I Faked Losing My Memory

I think I have loved Jake since we were kids we were next-door neighbors and constant playmates it was the most natural thing that we became best friends Jake lived with his grandparents he was always over my house I think he enjoyed being part of a normal family so I made him play with doll houses with me he taught me how to play baseball we rode our bikes and flew kites we played princess and monsters Jake was always my knight in shining armor we played in sandboxes playgrounds and even did our homework together Jake and I were inseparable when we got to junior high we were each other's dates it was easier that way we were always together anyway I didn't have to worry if I was pretty enough to be asked by other guys Jake didn't have to be nervous about asking another girl we did a lot of crazy things together once when we were 10 years old Jake dared me to drink some of his dad's brandy it tasted awful I threw up right after and got a terrible headache the next day Jake teased me a lot about puking so I just pretended that I didn't remember anything that happened that's how we were always joking and teasing since we were always together we just both assumed that we would always be there for each other no matter what we got teased a lot especially by our families they called us mr. and mrs. we just shrugged it off besides I didn't think it was so bad if I ended up marrying Jake when we got older it would be great to marry my best friend when I would think about it I always pictured myself at a wedding with me walking down the aisle with my hand on Jake's arm it was like it was foretold I already met my soul mate when I was just four years old do you want to meet and marry your soul mate to click the like button and subscribe to our Channel don't forget to leave a great comment below but as we got older and things began to change I guess it's only natural that Jake started hanging out with other boys I had other girlfriends too but my best friend was always going to be Jake nothing was ever going to change that one day Jake went over to my house and brought a new friend along hey Sara he said this is Gilbert when I looked at Gilbert my heart totally stopped he was the most handsome boy I had ever seen when the Sun hit the top of his head his golden hair shone like a halo I felt like I was looking at an angel hi Sara Gilbert said he shook my hand and I felt the electricity passed between us Jake asked me if they could hang out with me that day of course I said yes Gilbert turned out to be a great guy it even helped that he looked like a model too he was funny and he was a good listener he always smiled when Jake and I got into our arguments I have to admit that I developed a little crush on Gilbert how could I not he was so handsome and kind so for months on end it became the three of us we watched movies together we had silly picnics in the park the summer before we all left for college our parents agreed that we could all take a trip with just the three of us so he went to the beach house of Gilbert's family and stayed overnight after dinner Gilbert brought out some drinks we giggled and laughed a lot knowing that we weren't old enough to drink yet but we did it anyway I wasn't used to drinking and I got drunk really fast the next thing I knew I was on the couch cuddling with Gilbert you're so handsome I told him while I stroked his cheek I could see that Gilbert was getting uncomfortable Sarah I think you've had enough to drink he told me he tried to push my hand away but I refused and instead I did the most aggressive thing I have ever done in my life I kissed Gilbert full on the lips I didn't know if it was his first kiss but it was definitely mine I only stopped kissing Gilbert when I heard the sound of something breaking when I looked up I saw Jake looking at us with a shocked look on his face somehow that look brought me to my senses I blushed stood up and apologized sorry I think I've had enough to drink I told the boys I'd ran to the bathroom and locked myself in I splashed some water on my face to clear my head I felt so guilty about doing something like that especially in front of Jake when I remembered his face I remember seeing anger disbelief and a little bit of disgust I knew I loved Jake but was I in love with him should I have kissed him instead it was a huge mistake to kiss Gilbert but he was just so handsome is this how it felt loving to different people at the same time I felt so confused and I totally dreaded facing the two of them again the next morning during breakfast the next day Gilbert tried to talk to me Sara about last night he started to say but Jake bite it in she doesn't remember he said when we drank some of my dad's brandy when we were 10 years old Sara did a lot of silly things but she forgot all about them the next day although I remember kissing Gilbert I decided to play along I lied and said I didn't remember doing anything the night before it was just easier to pretend that nothing happened that memorable evening was the last one we had in a long time I was off to a different College than the two boys I knew I would only see them during the holidays I was going to miss being with Jake all the time but it wasn't all that bad we were still texting and calling each other a lot I was glad to hear that Jake was still hanging out with Gilbert I was bummed to hear that neither of them were coming back home for Christmas or Spring Break Jake said that they had a lot of things planned with the boys I just reminded him to be good and not to kiss random girls you're the random kisser he teased me it was a good thing that he couldn't see my face because I still remember that awkward night so I didn't see the boys until the next summer on my first day back I heard a frantic knock on my bedroom door I jumped out of bed quickly and opened the door Jake was standing there all tanned and smiling I hugged him fiercely then I felt another pair of arms around us it was Gilbert it was a nice three-way hug from a group of old friends that summer almost felt like we were never apart we spent every day together just trying to catch up on Miss time I felt a little jealous of some of the things Jake and Gilbert did without me it sounded like they had a lot of fun in their College what about you Sara Gilbert asked break any hearts in that fancy College of yours I left a little too loudly and shook my head now that Jake was here I realized that he was the reason why I never fell for anyone in college no one understood me like Jake did I looked at him and that he felt exactly the same way it was a surprise when he asked Gilbert to go home early that day I've got to talk to Sarah for a bit he explained to Gilbert Gilbert nodded and left Jake asked me to go for a walk I was feeling kind of excited and nervous what was he going to say was he finally going to let me know that he felt something between us were we finally finalizing that we were an item now so we took a walk in the park we sat down on a bench and he held my hand there's something I want to tell you Sarah he began with all seriousness I thought to myself this is it it doesn't matter to him that I kissed Gilbert last year he knows that I was just drunk he's going to tell me that he loves me too I love you Sarah he said I beamed I've loved you from when we were kids I've wanted to tell you something for a long time I know that you'll understand Sarah I'm gay what I couldn't believe what I was hearing how can Jake be gay I mean he just told me that he loved me then he said something else that was totally unbelievable he said that he was in love with Gilbert and Gilbert felt the same way about him I just sat there and stared at Jake of all the things he could have told me that day this was the last thing that I expected I reminded him that he was upset when I kissed Gilbert all this time I thought he was jealous because he was in love with me then Jake laughed I knew you were just pretending that you forgot about that night he said I was trying to save your dignity I also know that you kissed Gilbert because he's so handsome I thought that was the reason I fell for him too but it's not just his looks you know how Gilbert is he's so great damn Jake he knew me too well but there was something he knew nothing about he didn't know that I was in love with him he kept talking about wanting his own family he never felt like he was complete because he never knew his own parents he was scared to come out to other people especially to his grandparents he kept asking me if I understood and if I was still his best friend I couldn't reply my heart felt like it was being crushed in my chest so I stood up and left it was just too humiliating I didn't see either Jake or Gilbert again that summer it was a relief when it was finally time to go back to school I went through a dating craze when I went back to college and I rarely went home I didn't want to see anyone from my past it was probably all over town by now everybody probably knew that Jake was gay I couldn't face everyone feeling sorry for me so I dated as many boys as I could I needed to prove to myself that men could fall in love with me I needed to prove to myself that I didn't need Jake's love so I ended up dating Wesley and he became my boyfriend then one day I was pregnant there was no other place to go but home I packed my bags and went home in tears my life was such a mess Wesley was just as shocked as I was he didn't want to be a father just like I didn't want to become a mom not yet anyway I was too young I wanted to get married to a great guy first and have a honeymoon I wanted a career I didn't want to be bogged down with a child it wasn't ready I don't know who called him but suddenly jake was back home with me too he knew I was going through a hard time we both cried a lot together I feel so alone I told him but Jake told me something that completely opened up my mind I felt alone for a long time too it's not easy being gay in this town I know people are judging me I had hoped for your support when I came out then the gravity of what I did suddenly dawned on me I kept saying that Jake and I were best friends but I left when he needed me most it's okay Sara he said I knew it was a shock he told me that he loved me he told me that being gay wasn't going to change the fact that I would always be his best friend then he told me that having a baby was one of the best things that could happen to anyone I don't want this baby Jake I replied you can't mean that you want an abortion Jake asked me with an angry voice you can't do that I sobbed and I nodded I knew I could never do that but what else were my option you can do this I'll be with you the whole time you won't be alone he said this baby is going to be so loved by everyone he begged me not to give the baby away he reminded me that he grew up without parents I nodded and agreed I could be a mother to this baby if I wanted to after a couple of weeks I started to feel better with Jake by my side he was my rock I got my strength from him then one day he told me some more news he and Gilbert decided to get married I must have cried buckets of Tears that day I was so happy for him I knew I could never have Jake even if I had deserted him in the past he was still there for me I was happy that he was happy somehow the thought of Jake and Gilbert stopped tormenting me I love them both very much and I finally decided that there was no room for jealousy if I loved someone Jake would always be my first love and if I loved him enough I would be happy for him too they decided to get hitched a few months before I gave birth Jake asked me to walk him down the aisle his grandparents didn't approve of their marriage but I was going to make sure that their wedding was going to be full of love and support it felt like the most natural thing I saw this happen in my head when I was just a child I was wearing a lovely dress and Jake wore a tuxedo Gilbert was waiting for us it broke my heart a little to let Jake go but if I was going to lose him to someone it was good that I was going to give him to a good person like Gilbert they never even left for a honeymoon my two boys stayed with me during the whole pregnancy you're so lucky Sarah Gilbert said as much as I want to be a father I guess I'll just settle for being your baby's favorite uncle hell no Jake cried I'm gonna be this baby's favorite person it warmed my heart to hear them that way the baby wasn't here yet and already they were becoming fathers as usual Gilbert agreed to give me anything that I wanted it was great it was like having two husbands that were super supportive they took care of me they held my hair back when I threw up they rubbed lotion on my growing bellies so I wouldn't get stretch marks they even went out in the middle of the night when I wanted to eat some pickles when I went into labor I was brave enough to endure the pain I was going to give this baby the best life it could ever have so I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl I waited to feel my motherly instincts kick in I looked at my baby and wondered if I could do the thing that I knew I had to do when Jake and Gilbert arrived to visit I saw them hold the baby in their arms they looked like a perfect family I'm finally giving you a wedding gift sorry it took so long I told my boys you're holding her in your arms then I handed Gilbert a stack of papers it was for my baby's adoption I was giving up my rights as a mother I was giving them my baby of all the years I've known Jake I've never seen him cry until that day and I never really realized just how much I loved him I loved all three of them I was giving my baby to the best parents in the world

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Views: 8,126,767

Rating: 4.8704996 out of 5

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Id: 3x-MEHNCC2w

Length: 14min 29sec (869 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 06 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/reneethecrow]

I cried so much at the end!