I decided to speedrun Cookie Clicker in the worst way possible

so today we're doing probably the worst speedrun of my life because we're doing cookie clicker but this isn't just regular cookie clicker because i thought you know what might as well torture myself even more so this is the cookie clicker speedrun where you can't click the cookie we can't do any of this there's not that that can't happen in the speed run instead what we're going to do is wipe our save and then start the speed run as soon as we wipe the save and now we're sitting here for probably like the next 10 minutes so in this speed run what you need to get is a golden cookie the golden cookies can randomly spawn anywhere here and they give you some cookies but we can't touch the actual cookie so we say here and don't click it why do i do this to myself so basically when you get the golden cookies you can use those to buy like these clickers grandma things like that and then they could actually give you cookies but for right now we do nothing and it's great let's go oh we got the wrong kind of golden cookie well that's unfortunate it gave us the wrong guide no good try this might take a bit chat oh let's go lucky cookie number one 13 cookies baby okay now we have to hope we get another one okay that is the first part all we need is one more of those and we can buy our first clicker but we have to get lucky enough to get another one of those no i mean it kind of worked i'm gonna keep going we'll lose about seven minutes but we're gonna go for one more golden cookie lucky let's go let's go finally we can actually play the game all right now is the fun part where there's a is something that's clicking on the cookie let's go auto clicks once every 10 seconds chat hooray so we're gonna get a couple of these before we get grandma because grandma is a hundred so we actually need something to start doing something isn't this 18 hello 18 cookies hello let me click you there you go bud 0.2 cookies per second feels good to be the king oh we see grandma's face now look at her go so now we want a frenzy we don't want the lucky golden cookie we want the frenzy cookie your cookies are popular in the neighborhood i've only made like a couple of them oh frenzy let's go give me grandma give me that grandma give me that old woman let's go grandma cook those cookies i see you over there i see you you're looking nice let me get another grandma we're gonna have a grandma army right now chat we're gonna have a grandma army this is the revolution of grandma's the most famous grandma army that has ever existed oh my gosh i can just keep buying grandmas there's no stop to the oldest grandmas and i might as well buy some cursers a couple of those we'll get to 10 on those look how much cookies we're getting per second this is beautiful okay i think we save up for a farm at this point now we have a lot of grandmas they're doing their thing but now we need farm which grows cookie plants from cookies that's not how cookies work but okay we got the farm we got the grandma and the farm it's beautiful and yeah we'll just keep getting some more grandmas now we probably want some more farms yeah we're basically just uh going through and getting more stuff as we go i don't know the exact ratios that are the most optimal i'll keep it a buck 50 with you but we'll figure it out look at that farm go look at it go look at our army of gran they're not even doing anything oh they have ages she's a hundred and she's still going strong making cookies that is devotion okay so we can get grandmas are twice as effective which will be very good so we're gonna get an upgrade for our grandmas because they are grown strong right now this is where the fun part starts coming in people are bored for a while but now we have grandma's doing twice as much and now we can buy another farm soon get the cheap this upgrade okay that's good we need another golden cookie that's really what we're hoping for oh mouse and curses we should probably get those as well okay we can about to get another farm and then we'll also upgrade grandmas pretty soon i don't even know how these are farms these are like the weirdest looking farms i've ever seen in my life might as well get some more cursors too they're cheap they just work out okay so we kind of are very behind world record but to be fair they got two good golden cookies in a row while we didn't but they're about to end in two minutes so we'll hope we're kind of on that same track all right i feel like it's time to save up for grandmas are twice as effective and we'll go from there grandmas let's go 94 cookies per second i feel like we want farms next or do we want to mine first before we get farms i think we get a mine first and then we get farms yeah golden cookie let's go frenzy okay here's where the here's where it gets exciting again look at that cookie sparkle it's beautiful we get a mind right here it's going to be beautiful thank you cookie clicker give me those cookie mines and now we can get some cheap hoes it'll be beautiful we can get some sugar gas as we go on maybe later oh look at all those cookies raining from the sky it's a beautiful thing all right we definitely want another mine before we go on give me more mines look how fast we're earning these cookies we are about to be done with the frenzy but we still will have a lot of cookies a lot of stuff we're gonna get out of this too 2676 cookies per second right now this is just beautiful this is just what you wanna see alright it has gone down a little bit but still 500 500 is pretty good and now i think we want to save up for uh getting some mines things like that some farms we want to upgrade our stuff that we have nana is aged 106. nana please all right we're gonna get farms twice as effective that's gonna boost our stuff up a bunch then we're gonna get mines twice as effective and we're just looking good i wanna get the sub one hour if we could get the sub one hour i am going to be extremely happy i'll buy three more grandmas just for the viewers that's for the fans we have psychedelic rapper andrew jd who is age 108. what is this game what we want to do is i'm just going to copy this person's exact numbers 33 grammars it'll be beautiful i'm a copier it is what it is why would i develop my own strats when i could just copy the ones right there it's beautiful the grands grandma no grandma no once we get our next cookie frenzy we are going to be balling i just need some golden cookies come on game give me the golden cookies that i'm asking for cookie shortage strikes town people forced to eat cupcakes just not the same do you see how many cookies i'm making we don't have a cookie shortage you're just not looking for them some people i swear but we're going to get farmer grandmas we're going to have our grandma's finally working all right grandma's oh look at him go granda i'm glad you're a farmer now all right we're now making a thousand per second oop golden cookie oh we got the bad golden cookie we needed those at the beginning not now oh that actually hurts so badly that would have been the win we were hoping for them for so long and then they just do that to us but that's okay we're still doing really well sub one hour is very much in our horizon literally if we got that cookie frenzy we would have won we would this speedrun would be over by now i guess this is what i signed up for oh this painful chat this is literally painful so now our choices 500 seconds is not that fast so we want to keep upgrading but oh that's annoying sub 50 is possible if we just get a golden cookie we win we we literally win right away why is oh wait is that the achievement wait do you not need oh you just need a million in general well we won i guess you just need in general oh i thought i was just get to a million cookies like right there well cool i would have spent more of my money if i knew that true never click make one million cookies with no cookie clicks this kind of defeats the whole purpose doesn't it yes it does and that's what my channel is about how much does this add to you okay it's not even that much but we could have like gotten some more stuff if i knew that it wasn't just whatever you know what good run anyway we got the sub 50. and now if we look on speedrun.com we got a 49 minute time so we're down in 25th place i'll take it i will take a 25th place you know maybe not the greatest thing in the world but pretty good if we just got that one last frenzy instead of that terrible golden cookie it would have been much better but we're going to take what we can get and yeah that's the run i kind of want to grind out this game 100 000 likes and i'll go for world record even though i already have other stuff that i promise to do that too for but i'll do it for this one too baby yep thanks for coming out chap

Channel: EazySpeezy

Views: 1,005,750

Rating: 4.9518571 out of 5

Keywords: EazySpeezy, cookie clicker, speedrun, speedrunning, speedrunner, speedruns, world record, wr, speedrun world record, cookie clicker speedrun, speedrun cookie clicker, cookie clicker world record, cookie clicker wr, neverclick, true neverclick, cookie clicker true neverclick, nerverclick speedrun, true neverclick speedrun, memeruns, memerun, meme speedrun, funny speedrun, glitch, any%, meme, eazyspeezy speedrun, any% speedrun, cookie clicker any%, eazyspeezy cookie clicker, cookie speedrun

Id: 78WkdPDPXkk

Length: 8min 41sec (521 seconds)

Published: Fri May 14 2021