- Yeah, here's here's
me and Guy at the night, you see it looks like a nightclub, which kind of looks like
isn't that Guy Fieri in a nightclub. And then he put a shirt on
my head for some reason. So happy. - And then pointed it at me. - He's so happy, man
and he was genuine too. Though he wasn't putting on any airs. I was bigger at the time too. I was a big kid. So this is a story about how I crashed Guy Fieri's 18
year old son's birthday party. I know what you're asking. How could that have possibly happened? And why have you not talked
about it every day of your life? 'Cause that sounds like the coolest thing that's ever happened to you. And it really is. How this all started. I had this very, very stupid plan that I was calling the tour de Fieri. 24 hours, 1000 miles, three
funky joints in Flavor Town. Plan is to pack all my friends in a car. Go up to Santa Rosa, where
he has his restaurant empire eat at three of his
restaurants in one day. We get appetizers at one Johnny Garlic's entrees at another Johnny Garlic's and then dessert at Tex Wasabi's which I believe is the crown
jewel of the Guy Fieri empire. Why exactly where we're doing this? I don't know it was college. We had a bunch of stupid ideas but there was this like
loose idea in my head that I eventually wanted
to be a food writer and be in food media and
that I needed stories. And here I am roughly eight
years later having done this. So I suppose it paid
off in a very weird way. There's another very
strange key part of this. And that is the New York Times food review by a Critic Pete Wells of Guy's American kitchen and
Bar in Times Square, New York. So this review went mega viral. It was this like very pompous
food critic, Pete Wells. He's like another food hero of mine. He's a fantastic writer, but
he absolutely eviscerated. Not only did he eviscerated he danced on the grave of this restaurant. I now know weed a, weed? - [Stevie] Weed you some quotes. - I wanna weed you some quotes, uwu. That stays in the edit. Oh, that felt so gross doing that. Guy Fieri, have you eaten
at your new restaurant in Times Square? Have you pulled up one of the 500 seats that Guys American kitchen
and Bar and order a meal? Did you eat the food? Did it live up to your expectations? Did panic grip your soul as you stared into the whirling
hypno wheel of the menu, where adjectives and nouns
spinning a crazy vortex. When you saw the burger described as Guy's Pat
La Frieda custom blend, all natural Creekstone
,black farm Angus beef Patty, L top lettuce, tomato
onion plus pickle SMC, super melty cheese and a
slathering of donkey sauce and garlic buttered brioche. Did your mind touch the void for a minute? Now, keep in mind. This is New York Times critic, Pete Wells. He's not supposed to be
writing about Guy Fieri. You're not supposed to pick on a TV chef who all Guy Fieri does is
travel around the country, eating things he loves
promoting small businesses and absolutely saves them. Anyway, here's this
incredibly pompous review. And I was like, look I got a
visit Guy Fieri's restaurants. I need to make this pilgrimage myself. And I need to see if it is actually as bad
as this dude says it is. Or is he just eating there
in the wrong context? 'Cause to me the right context to visit the Guy Fieri restaurant is the vibe that he puts out on a show. You're on a road trip with your buddies. You may have had a few adult beverages, and you're out there down to
get slathered and donkey sauce, and drink some large blue
drinks and a fishbowl, have a good time and be
open-minded about it, which is exactly what we did. So I gathered my friends together and we started the tour de Fieri. This is about 5:00 PM. The goal was just to get
appetizers at this one restaurant. Then we move on to entrees. And then we noticed the menu is somewhat like how Pete Wells described, it is a whirling hypno wheel. But however, if you're someone who enjoys the cheesecake factory as I do, you go to these restaurants and they're there to please a crowd. So we just order almost
everything on the appetizers menu. I mean we got this like squid and lobster, baked cheese, flatbread. We get the Calamari, we
get the chicken strips, we get the nachos, we get all of it. We're having a great time. We're sharing these large blue drinks. And then we notice on the wall they're selling Johnny Garlic's t-shirts. So we decide screw it. If we're really gonna
nail the tour de Fieri. And we planned to, we
had to look the part. We're gonna buy a matching t-shirts, which do look like a combination of a Bootleg Harley Davidson t-shirt and like an Ed Hardy designs. You know, the one you may have
owned one of those shirts. And then we ended up going to the next Johnny Garlic's location. The sun hadn't gone down at this point. We're all in our matching
outfits and we get entrees there. We ordered the bison meatloaf. We ordered Guy's Hawaiian chicken, and as suspected the food
was all perfectly fine. The servers were all fantastic. We got our drinks on time. It didn't break the bank. By the time the third
restaurant rolls around, is where things get a little bit weird. So, we're on our way to Tex Wasabi's, which is known as Guy
Fieri's rock and roll sushi and barbecue restaurant. It's getting really late at this time. I called the kitchen and ask what time they stopped serving food. And they said, "unfortunately, Tex Wasabi's is closed tonight
due to a private event." And my heart absolutely sank. We had gone so far. I mean drove 500 miles up
to Northern California. This was like a coming of age story. Where it would've felt incomplete. If we hadn't finished the tour de Fieri. We're all sitting there
not knowing what to do, and my buddy Marcus, he just looks at me straight
in the face and goes. It's gotta be Guy only Marcus,
what are you talking about? It's gotta be Guy. He would never rent out Tex Wasabi's. Which is like a combination
of like a nightclub a Hot Topic, a Sushi Bar
and a barbecue restaurant. He said that he wouldn't
rent that out to anybody but himself. We have to go, at least see what's up. I'm like fine. Like, why not? We're here. And so we get to Tex Wasabi's and there's immediately
like these spotlights kind of spitting up out of the restaurant and we all walk up in matching
Johnny Garlic's, t-shirts looking like an absolutely crazy tourists fun girl group for Guy Fieri. And I go to a bouncer and we're like, hey we'd like a table for five knowing damn well, the
restaurant was closed. And he goes, Oh, I'm sorry. It's actually Guy Fieri his
son's 18th birthday party today. Oh, Oh, that is very interesting. So I stand there for a second and I'm like I'm gonna regret
for the rest of my life. If I do not try and do
everything in my power to at least argue the fact that I should get in the restaurant. I wasn't gonna be pushy. I wasn't gonna complain. So I told this bouncer,
Hey, I'm a food writer. I lied. I looked no part the journalist and truly was not at the time I was in a matching
Johnny Garlic's t-shirt probably covered in bison, meatloaf glaze and a little bit of blue drink
from the last restaurant. And he was like, you
know let me get my boss. So then a bigger bouncer comes. But this time I've already told the story. So I'm getting like a little
bit more fluent with it. You know, I'm kinda like
learning where I can add pathos to this and what not
really make them feel. I spin the whole yarn, he goes let me get the head of security. He's a smaller bouncer, but he's got one of
those little ear pieces with the curlies on it. And so I'm like, okay,
okay, now it's real. Meanwhile, I just got like my four friends standing behind me and matching t-shirts. We looked absolutely crazy, but he seemed to find
something endearing about us. So then he goes, let me get
Guy's personal assistant. This is like fighting video game bosses. So Guy's personal assistant comes down, by this point I am like
the boy scout master Who's been telling campfire
ghost stories, his entire life. And I just put everything
I have into this. She's laughing, I'm laughing. And then she goes, show me
something you've written. And I had not actually written
anything at that point. So I pulled up the most
official looking blog post on my blog and I give her my phone and she goes, "give me a second." So we're standing in the alley
and I'm talking to Dasan. I'm like, dude, I think she's
taking my blog to Guy Fieri. And a woman passed to
me and she is, Guy who? And I immediately kind of recognize her I was like, I feel like I've seen you. And I just go Fieri, she
is goes, that's right! And I was like, Oh my God, that was that was Guy Fieri's wife. We are suddenly one degree of separation from Guy Fieri himself. And then suddenly we turned and there's sort of a tunnel leading into the restaurant. We're in the back alley. And we see this towering
figure walk around the corner and person, if I had an estimate I would say it was six-five,
260 pounds of pure muscle. They looked like an absolute linebacker. But then I looked to the top of their head and I see some spikes sticking up. Holy crap, that's Guy Fieri, and he's coming on an absolute war path. I can not describe how thick this man is. Guy Fieri is six feet tall
of pure full back strength. He goes, hey, who the f is
trying to take a picture of me? And we're all like, Oh my
God, we pissed Guy Fieri. I can't believe we did this. And then his face just
brightens up into a smile. And he goes, "I'm just kidding bros." I heard y'all are big fans. Then he bro-hugged all of us individually. And he was so warm and his
hands were so muscular. This is getting into weird territory. And then he asked us, what
the heck are you doing here? Sorry, the restaurants closed. And I tell him about the tour de Fieri. And I tell him that his road trips trying to find funky
joints all across America has inspired me to take a road trip with my best friends,
up to his restaurants. And then he starts apologizing for Tex Wasabi's being closed, saying he feels bad that we
can't finish the tour de Fieri. And he says, Hey, I'll tell you what it's my son's birthday party. We don't want any photos or anything. So please just be cool. But you Guys can come in, hang out, check out the space, eat
the food, drink some drinks and just have a good time. Did Guy Fieri just invite us into his eldest son's 18th birthday party? And he did. And the space was absolutely incredible. I mentioned it's like a nightclub. There are lasers everywhere. And there are waiters passing around just all of Guy Fieri's greatest hits. Suddenly, we see a video of
Matthew McConaughey playing reading a Hunter Fieri birthday message. And we realized that Guy Fieri had all of his most
famous celebrity friends record videos for his son that he played around the restaurant. Like this Guy is just
filled with so much love and he receives so much
hate from so many people including this highfalutin,
New York Times food critic. And it made me realize why
we did the tour de Fieri in the first place that his
theory was exactly right. He's just someone trying to
create happiness in the world. Say what you want about unhealthy foods. Say what you want about his style, but anyways I digress. So at the end of the night we're all just hanging
out, having a good time. Guy goes, all right. All right. All right. You guys can take a couple photos of me. He decide grabs the t-shirt
off the wall, Tex Wasabi's and puts it around my
head for some reason. And then he says, you
know, I feel really bad you didn't get to finish
the tour de Fieri. So I'll tell you what,
come back tomorrow morning at 10:30 AM before service
starts at Tex Wasabi's and I'll have my manager set you up with a free tasting menu Brunch. And we were just like, what? You have no reason to treat us this way. We are imposing on your life. Guy Fieri is the mother
Teresa of the food world. And so we go, we sleep off
all the drinks that we had and we wake up the next day
and we go to Tex Wasabi's and sure enough there's already food waiting for us on the table. And his manager greets us. And if we thought it
couldn't get any sweeter she just starts spinning this whole story about how much working a
Guy Fieri's restaurants has mentor her and how
well he treats the staff. Obviously I can't speak for everyone. And then there is the actual food. I know it sounds stupid to say it's one of the best
meals you've eaten in your life. But if you think about the best meals you've eaten in your life, it's not just the best food, right? It's the best context. It's the family around it. It's the social setting. It's all of these other things combining to create a strong memory with that food. Even if that food is like avocado, Buffalo blue cheese, ranch, egg
rolls at 11 in the morning. And so we finish up this free brunch that Guy Fieri himself set up for us and we're all driving home. And then it hit me. People always say, never meet your heroes because they'll never live
up to your expectations. And I met mine and he
exceeded my expectations in absolutely every way imaginable. And that night really
did inform everything that I've done in my life since then, which sounds very dramatic. Again, I told you I was
trying to be a writer and I felt like I was at a crossroads. Do I try and be the Pete Wells? Someone who can spin a critique and absolutely eviscerate
someone with incredible pros or do I be the Guy Fieri. Someone who worked in silence for so long until he finally got a shot
on the Next Food Network Star and then became this
international sensation who only treats people with kindness and it was then that I learned critiquing will never be as important as building. So anytime I get sucked
into these holes, right? I just find myself getting
absolutely negative. I always had this little
Guy Fieri on my shoulder. Kind of pulling me back and saying, do everything with kindness. And I've really never had the opportunity to thank Guy for frankly, changing my life at a point where I didn't
know what direction to choose. So this is my official,
thank you to Guy Fieri. You have meant so much
to me and I hope one day, if I am anywhere close
to as successful as you, that a group of strange
teenagers will show up to my own son's birthday party and I can treat them with
half the amount of kindness and respect and empathy
that you showed me that day. So Guy from the bottom of my heart. Thank you. And thank you for letting
me share this story with you in the Mythical Kitchen. We got new episodes out every week and new episodes of our podcast, a hot dog is a sandwich every Wednesday, wherever you get your podcast. And hit us up on Instagram
at Mythical Kitchen, with pictures of your mythical dishes. I'll see you all next time. You can cook up your own feast while wearing the Mythical Kitchen apron. Available now at mythical.com.
