Hello everyone and welcome back to my youtube channel! My name is Jack Edwards and for today's video we are doing something... so dumb. I came up with this concept about five minutes ago and I've turned on the camera so i guess we're doing it. Basically I saw on TikTok that you can buy "decorative books" on Etsy. They are for interior-design purposes, they're for aesthetic value only and so i'm going to be putting them to the test. I am going to buy a stack of decorative books and then read them and i'll review them, i'll tell you what they're like... that's it, that's the video. All aboard the chaos train. Okay, so I'm on this Etsy store called BooksOnShow and they have all these different options -- there's actually so many. So, the question on everyone's lips of course is what colour do I go for? I mean, I'm currently wearing green so maybe i'll just buy the green ones? There was no logic in that decision at all, but then again where do you find logic on this youtube channel? I feel like green is quite in at the moment and I want to be trendy. Here we go, here they are. I mean I hope I get "Michael Jackson's Beer Companion" that sounds like a hoot. And the order has officially been placed and now we wait... [Intro music] On tonight's program ladies and gentlemen we have something that's going to make you sick Okay, so my mystery box of books has arrived and I'm so intrigued because there could genuinely be anything in here. But, before we get on to the unboxing I wanted to let you know that this video is in collaboration with the Census and that is because i wanted to remind my UK viewers the crucial importance of filling in the Census. This very special and important survey only happens every 10 years and it's mad to me to think how much has changed in the last 10 years and how different my life will be 10 years from now -- I could have a dog! I could be married! Oh my god I could have a child! Okay what we're not gonna do is have an existential crisis -- the point is, the Census gives us so much detail about the society that we live in and it can inform policy-making in fields like education, business, healthcare, and the environment, and so much more and that is why it's so crucial for everyone to fill in the Census, especially students otherwise those policies are going to be made more blind than this selection of books. I would honestly say it took me about 10 minutes to fill in and even though Census Day has passed you still have time to complete it and if you're a university student you should register at your uni address, so I'll leave the link down below and you'll get sent a household access code to your phone and you can fill it in. And now let's get into my selection of green books... okay they are definitely very green. Hopefully they'll be making you green with envy. I'm pretty sure they're in size order so this is the smallest one -- this is the Growing Pains of Adrian Mole by Sue Townsend. Okay i'm pretty sure there are multiple Adrian Mole books but I've never read one. Okay it looks like it's kind of written in the format of diary entries -- oh i'm excited to read this you know! It was only recently when i was watching an episode of The Chase I realized that Adrian Mole is like a human character and not like Peter Rabbit so that is a strong first book I actually want to read. What is the next book going to be? The Batsford Colour Book of Vintage Cars.....? Sure. I'm holding it upside down for a start... from the looks of it there's basically a picture of a vintage car and then a description of what that car is like so I might learn something, it's not necessarily something I'd pick out for myself but i'll give it a go, Honestly this feels like christmas -- this book is called- you're joking! You know I just said this feels like christmas? This book is called the Victorian Christmas Book! That's actually mental. Oh, the next book is fancy! Look at that! This one is called The Pilgrim's Way: Shrines and Saints in Britain and Ireland -- straight away I found Durham where i went to university and it talks about St Cuthbert and my college at Durham was actually called St Cuthbert's Society named after this guy so that'll be interesting to find out more about him. Um, the rest of the pages... we'll see. I did not realise this video was gonna be educational, I thought the one thing i'd learn would be "don't order aesthetic books" but so far this is looking quite interesting. The next book is called Cook for Hire. I reckon this is a cookbook --oh it is! And look how good that food looks. Although, the first recipe I've seen is called "tomato ring mould" which sounds... pleasant? Wait wouldn't it be fun if i cooked all of my meals just using this cookbook? I think I might do that you know? I'm going to go through this and pick out some recipes to try out. Okay, that's a win. Then again, anything to do with food was always gonna be a win. The next book is called How to Paint in Watercolors -- that is very lockdown friendly -- I mean I have zero artistic ability and no watercolor paints but you know what you never know when the knowledge from this book will come in handy, so i'm looking forward to reading it. And the final book is called Introducing Oriental Art. Well, Philip Rawson I would love to know about Oriental art. You know it's been a while since i read books with pictures in so i'm actually buzzing. So this is my pile of aesthetic books.... i have to say that is quite beautiful and it would look lovely on a bookshelf, but we are going to be seeing whether this is brains as well as beauty and so i guess i better start reading and find out whether these books are aesthetic... or just pathetic. This video may be a very strong contender for the stupidest video I have ever done. Okay so a couple of days have passed and, um, here's the thing. When, the books arrived I was genuinely excited because getting new books is always exciting, right? However, that enthusiasm quite quickly waned because saying that you'll read the books and thinking about reading the books is very different to actually reading them. Because i just realised I have no interest in any of these... like, do i care about victorian christmases? No, not really. Not even a little bit actually! But, today is the day. I've dedicated the whole day just to reading these books and I am bloody well going to do it -- so cheers to that. We're gonna need it. Also, this bookshelf has had the glow up of the century since i last vlogged. So my grandmother got me this light for Christmas and -- look! It's a book! It's a freaking book! How fun is that? That's awesome. I think I'm having more entertainment from this than i will from any of the books that I've got to read-- but I am procrastinating, let's go. Okay, so I have just finished book number one, This was the Growing Pains of Adrian Mole and I loved it, genuinely what an amazing book! I have given so few five-star reviews so far this year but this this was a five star the humour in this book is so dry and witty and British and i actually laughed out loud multiple times whilst reading this and that has never happened to me before when reading a book, so Adrian Mole is essentially a 15-year old growing up in the Thatcher era so think like Falklands War, that kind of thing. Basically, The Crown Season 4, except instead of Charles and Diana and Queen Liz this is all about an average middle-class family and it's basically just his daily diary entries where he talks about school and relationships and kind of discovering class and sex for the first time. His parents' relationship is so toxic i think it might have inspired the song by Britney Spears and they're both having these really messy affairs but we're seeing it from the perspective of Adrian Mole who just doesn't understand at all and Sue Townsend captures this naive, childlike voice and imagination so well. Honestly, I wish I'd read this when i was like 15 or 16. It's just all about double-meanings misunderstandings and chaos quite frankly. So much irony, such a charming little book... I did not expect this y'know! For example, on May 9th we have a diary entry that says "I've just realised that I've never seen a dead body or a real female nipple. This is what comes of living in a cul-de-sac." Wednesday, June the 30th "My mother wants to move. She wants to sell the house that I've lived in all my life. She said that we will need more room for the baby. How stupid can you get? Babies hardly take any space at all. They're only about 21 inches long!" I thoroughly enjoyed this so... who was expecting that? Not me. Also, alongside my aesthetic green books I also bought this selection of orange paperback classics -- oh wow that was satisfying wasn't it, look at that! If you're interested I did an unboxing of these books over on my second channel -- I'll link the video down below and you can go check that out after this video if you fancy it and, um, yeah... also good fun. Okay we seem to have had a little bit of a fall from grace. We might have peaked a bit too soon because book number two was... not so good. So this was the Batsford Colour Book of Vintage Cars. At first, I thought this might be a colouring book and was very disappointed to find out that it's not. It was just a guide to all of these different vintage motor cars but could someone please tell me why there was a racist comment on page 23? Obviously those words should never be used but like how do you manage to write a book about cars and still manage to be racist? How irrelevant! I mean, the pictures were nice at least. I think this was my favourite one. I think I'm just mad that it wasn't a colouring book because that would have been much more entertaining than this book actually managed to be, so on to the next one. Guys, I'm kind of losing the will to live a little bit here. So this next book was the guide to watercolours. It's framed as a kind of "beginner's guide" and that's definitely the category that i fall into but it's just absolutely not right. Let's find an example -- basically it would say it's going to teach you how to draw something but it would be like "just quickly sketch up a quick drawing of a human!" What do you mean quickly sketch THAT? If i could sketch like that I would not need this book. It really said "step one: be good at art" and i'm like "whoa, backtrack" I'm gonna need the absolute basics from you sir. Like it was just demoralizing when you can't even do step one. I do not have the facilities for that. This took me back to year eight art class and that's not a good thing. Honestly I've learned more from a 15-second TikTok than i did from this book. So, to conclude, Bob Ross if you're watching... [whisper] I think you might be dead... Bob Ross if you're alive and watching then don't worry about it, don't quit the day job because this man is not coming for your career. So, the next book is this Victorian christmas one and can someone please tell me why they depicted Father Christmas like actual Satan? Like, what the hell is that? I would not want that coming down my chimney. You're telling me that people are worried about the Call Me by Your Name music video when this exists? No, no, no, no, no, this is enough to ruin the Christmas spirit for me. I mean thank god i was not a Victorian child because i would not want presents from that guy... i wouldn't even want him present, full stop. Another thing I learned is that Victorian Christmas cards would depict, like, children being told off or a husband murdering his wife, so that's... festive? Also, what I didn't know is that December the 6th is St Nicholas Day and actually a lot of the time they would give presents on that day instead of Christmas Day, and the royal family used to eat swans on Christmas Day so... full of fun facts this. You know, when The Chase make my hotline bling, I'm ready... I'm ready now. I think i've mentioned The Chase multiple times in this video, can you tell I've watched a lot of daytime television in this pandemic? One thing that was kind of ironic was that I read this book all about the christmas spirit, uh, on a day where it has been one of the hottest days in March in London ever, so that was quite strange. But not more strange than Father Christmas in the Victorian era and, y'know, will my brain retain any of that information? Probably not. Moving on. Okay, you know I had high expectations for this cooking book? Well, it was very disappointing. Let me put it this way: have you ever read a cookbook that made you feel less hungry than when you started it? Because me neither until now. Genuinely, I lost my appetite whilst reading this because all of the recipes sound gross. I mean if these were all of the recipes that i knew i would definitely be needing a "cook for hire" because i would need someone else to come in with some new ideas. One thing i did learn and now know is that a "tomato ring mould" means that you make the tomato ring in a mould but, y'know, call me fussy but i just don't think I want the word "mould" in any recipe that I am cooking. And my initial plan was to cook a whole day's worth of meals from this cookbook but i don't fancy any of them and then the ones that did sound good were just so unrealistic like "stuffed squid" sounds great but where am I gonna get a squid from? So by process of elimination, because I didn't want to cook anything else, I am going to make chicken satay which does sound delicious. It's quite complicated -- it seems to have a lot of ingredients and I feel like my maximum is like seven, but i'm gonna head to the shop and i'm gonna buy these ingredients and then we will see what happens. Normally food is what gets me through the day so, um, we'll give it a go. Okay, so I have my ingredients--- will this cupboard door leave me alone? Everyone wants a cameo, jesus! Okay, so the ingredients are here and then this is the kind of instruction bit I had to make a few slight adjustments. For example, it said get the highest quality peanut butter but I got Aldi home brand so we're working with what we've got and if i can do this. It will be proven to be idiot-proof, so let's give it a go and see what happens. Okay, i'm trying to do a little DIY job on the almonds but i don't think it's working. I'm just taking out my anger at the other books i've decided to put them in the blender and I think this could be a good way of crushing them up, so -- listen -- don't be afraid to call me a genius. It's fine, Okay, here we go -- oh my god, it's not plugged in. You know that thing i said about calling me a genius? Oh i am a genius! No one -- [blender turns on] oh! No-one is more surprised that this is going well than I am by the way. Look at me actually weighing everything out. This is character development if I've ever seen it. Gordon Ramsay, i'm
coming for the crown and now we leave this chicken to marinate in the spices and coconut milk for like two hours and, actually, this doesn't look awful.... yet -- it's always good to clarify -- it doesn't look awful yet. But i'm sure that time will come. While i've been waiting for my chicken to marinate i have been reading the p--- what's it called? The Pilgrim's Way! I think my brain just glitched completely... maybe this isn't so good for me. But the section on Durham was really cool because I learned a lot more about the area that i lived in for like three years -- I say "like three years" because... oop- pandemic! In fact look, look at that picture of Durham Cathedral. That's where I should have graduated and instead my final term was University of Zoom. So this is the tomb of Bede in Durham Cathedral and when i was in my first year of uni i actually studied Bede's work so we were reading the Ecclesiastical History of England by Bede whilst Bede was literally buried like 100 meters from where i was sitting. That's kind of cool in a morbid sort of way, so this was quite nice to just reminisce because in my first year of uni I literally lived next to Durham Cathedral. As for the rest of the book... I kind of skim-read it, i'm not gonna lie. This
bit's sweet as well, um, in the front there's a message that says "to John on your very special birthday, with all good wishes..." and then that kind of looks like it says Stalin but i'm gonna assume -- i'm gonna assume it wasn't from Stalin. Also, kind of weird to think that that person either gave the book away that someone else gifted them or ........ died. Either way, i've got the book
now and i'm treasuring it, thank you maybe Stalin. And now hopefully the chicken is done marinating and I can do the next steps. So that there is the chicken and then in here we have like peanut butter, oil, lemon juice, soy sauce, all that good stuff, and chili powder, and I think we're gonna mix the two together and you know we've got the best of both worlds. You know what, I don't think that's gone terribly it actually looks kind of edible... and i'll take
kind of edible. Kind of edible is a win in my books. I just completely burnt my finger on that pan, so this better be good. I mean, it really does smell like peanut butter. Well, here goes nothing -- except maybe food poisoning -- whoa, wait a damn minute, oh my god! My compliments to the chef ... which is me! That's delicious. Well, I have to say I am now available to cater for weddings or funerals. I may cause the funerals -- I'll let you know in like 24 hours whether I survived this but i think that's actually a job well done. So, I'm reading, um, an Introduction to Oriental Art and look at these! Isn't that just stunning. That is, that is amazing. Like the art in here is obviously beautiful. This bit is especially cool because when i went to China i got to go to Beijing and see like the Summer Palace and so it's cool learning about the architecture and the designs behind those. Overall, this guide to art was quite lovely. I learned a lot more about like Buddhism, Taoism, Confucianism, which i think is really helpful when i'm kind of reading Asian literature. I know that's really nerdy but i did actually get quite a lot of value from this because it spoke about what different colors symbolize and what different imagery would mean and, um, I think that's quite useful when you're reading literature that is inspired by these religions as well, so i didn't hate it even though it was quite dense, like it could really have done with some subtitles -- what's a guy got to do to get some subtitles around here? You know, but that's a small qualm in the grand scheme of things. So, that is the final one -- maybe i should rank them from best to utterly shite. Okay, i've been tearing apart my house trying to find these books and it turned out my camera was balancing on one of them and that's why I couldn't find it, so take these recommendations with a pinch of salt because I clearly am stupid, But i am basically going to sort of tier-rank these books so, firstly, god tier: the Growing Pains of Adrian Mole. Of course this book was awesome, big fan, would actually heartily recommend and also i've seen there's a very good audiobook of it on Youtube so, if you're interested, check it out! Next we have the good tier: this is the book about Asian artwork which i enjoyed. Then we're gonna skip the okay tier because there's nothing in it and just go straight to the meh tier -- oh no, actually that's being quite unfair. I'll put the Pilgrims Way
and the Victorian Christmas Book Holiday Special ... what's it called? The victorian Christmas Book! Those two books will go in the okay category -- quite informative but ultimately not that interesting. "Meh" is Cook for Hire. Aside from that chicken thing it all just sounded gross and I think the primary reason for the existence of cookbooks is to make nice food. And then finally we have the "would not touch it with a barge pole" tier and that has How to Paint with Watercolors because it taught me nothing aside from that rule one of being good art is "having a natural ability at art" and then The Batsford Colour Book of Vintage Cars which loses points just for being racist. Obviously if we're talking purely aesthetic value then I think they do quite well because they've all got this lovely gold foiling and i'm into it. She is beauty, she is grace. And what did we achieve here? I'm not entirely sure, but the deed is done. Now I feel like I should address the elephant in the room... or the aesthetic pile of books in the room. I think a lot of you will expect me to hate this concept because "books should be read and books shouldn't be used just for decorative value" but -- but i'm not mad at it, like i don't mind. I think so many books each year are pulped and also these books probably all came from a charity shop, right? I imagine what this Etsy seller does is just goes to charity shops and then curates piles of aesthetic looking books so basically saves you a job if that's what you're into, and that means money for charity, more space on the shelves in the charity shops for other books other people may be interested in, and so I don't see the harm in it really. As long as books are out there -- y'know, these books could still be read and enjoyed by anyone -- I will get behind that, I will support that because it means more money in the book industry. Also, the Etsy seller definitely isn't responsible for the quality of the literature inside the books nor if they have any questionable themes because you can't expect them to like read through all of these... like i have just done. So, ultimately, if you came to this video expecting me to be calling out this Etsy seller and -- y'know -- suggesting that they should be descending down to hell on a pole like Lil Nas X then i'm sorry I can't deliver that for you. So, if you enjoyed watching this video and you enjoyed watching me suffer then you can give this video a big fat juicy thumbs up and you can also subscribe to me down below -- we are on the road to 400,000 subscribers which is -- that should be illegal. Also, if you haven't yet done the Census make sure you do down below. It could not be easier to complete so get on it. All the best, stay in touch, have a wonderful day and I'll see you next time! Bye!! [Outro music] In case i don't see you good
afternoon good evening and good night
