How To Stop Being A People Pleaser Right Now - Gary Vaynerchuk | Motivational Talk

it's uncomfortably simple out there which means it's ridiculously complicated what i mean by that is it's no different what i'm going to talk to you about whether it's life or business right now is really no different than if this was a health conference i would come and they would say how do we get healthier and i would stand up here and i would say i'd like you to eat better and i'd like you to exercise every day and i would say thank you very much and i'm out that's actually the answer but we don't want to hear it we'd rather buy 29 [ __ ] apple vinegar [ __ ] we'd rather buy some [ __ ] thing that [ __ ] tightens your waist and performance enhancement drugs and [ __ ] ass implants and all this other [ __ ] the reality is it's super simple if for some way through a joke or an analogy or a conversation here today or an answer to a question i can get you to start the process of genuinely being able to handle judgment because you finally are exhausted exhausted of living your life based on other people's opinions including stranger pants 96 and your mom those two extremes and listen i know how many people here consume my content thank you so for the ones that do you know my example is the anonymous comment from sallypants49 or rickface or jumpman36 so it's the two extremes it's you don't do things because somebody says you're ugly or you're stupid in a comment and you have no idea who they are and they're hiding between an avatar and some [ __ ] name over here all the way to mom that that's what i spend all my time on from this person to that person why is that dictating you this one makes a lot of sense to me ironically that one makes a lot of sense to me you all went through high school you all lived life trying to do [ __ ] to impress other people and we still do it at scale the only thing listen i'm not out here living my life trying to convince people how to make money like me because making money is a talent like singing and playing sports some people are better at it than others can it be taught of course it can be taught you can always be better at something than you were at a starting point i can be better at dancing and singing and basketball but i'm not [ __ ] gonna be lebron or beyonce do i think people can go from the kind of person that can have a forty thousand dollar a year business to a three million dollar business yes i do do i think the person that has the natural skill of a forty thousand dollar a year business can make 45 million a year no i do not do i think that we completely need to recalibrate our relationship with what success looks like yes i do like we're out here talking about making a million dollars a year as the entry point to balling when the one percent of americans top earners start at 440 000 a year if you make 440 000 a year in here you were in the one percent earners in america one of the richest countries in the world we're [ __ ] confused my friends there's people in here that are 29 that are that think their life's [ __ ] over next year because they're gonna turn 30 and they don't have their [ __ ] figured out there's [ __ ] 88 year olds running around jersey that haven't [ __ ] figured out their life [Music] i don't know what miraculous situation of my parents having sex at the right moment me being born in the soviet union me growing up in edison and working in a liquor store in springfield but i'm telling you right now whatever those dynamics were i sit here back home with an amazing amount of gratitude to my perspective forget about anything else i've got going on i'm trying to spend the rest of my life to articulate my perspective so that you can debate it against yours i'm not trying to have you have my perspective i'm just trying i don't think by the way i don't think i'm right i don't think i'm right i don't think i've earned the ability to tell anybody anything i think if i disappear tomorrow on some tragic accident i trend on twitter for a half a day and then everybody moves on with their lives like i get it but i'm telling you if you're [ __ ] here today please hear me i can give you every tactic on linkedin and tick tock and facebook and email and text i can give it to you you keep watching what i listen you want to have business success watch what i do for the rest of my life publicly copy it verbatim but then put in your [ __ ] in it and i promise you you'll be successful because i'm [ __ ] really good at my [Applause] [ __ ] that my friends is not the interesting part the interesting part is why can i do what i do why am i not scared to make content on tick tock when it's all teenage people right why am i willing to spend a ton of time having a ton of different [ __ ] going on and if something fails i don't give a [ __ ] i have vaynermedia i have vaynersports i have empathy i have a million things going on inevitably some of those things are gonna fail things that shouldn't fail but they're going to when you have 87 things you're not going to go 87-0 my ability to deal with your judgment when i go 70 and 13 is my strength why are you only doing one thing why don't you do [ __ ] because you're [ __ ] scared the question is why like i'm just trying to get to why like who like who's gonna cast judgment my friends every person here that's not 100 happy including myself is not doing something because of judgment of somebody else 100 that's the [ __ ] game more importantly how do you start chipping away in a world where you were parented or your environment made you that way how do you chip away here's how you storytell that is the responsibility and almost the way i feel i live i have figured out over the last decade or two really actually half decade to a decade oh i have gift for gab same reason i could sell same reason oh i'm a good storyteller so i'm going to give you stories why do i put out those analogies those clips saying the same [ __ ] because there's only 15 truths i just have to say them a million different ways to catch you at the right time with the right slang on the right platform at the right moment i appreciate you too i appreciate you too [Applause] you know how in high school you were worried about your zit and [ __ ] i used to be scared of [ __ ] when i said i was like [ __ ] i don't go to [ __ ] school what i learned through life was nobody gave a [ __ ] about my sit they were worried about theirs it the number why do i tell that story because right now people here are in debt or can't do something because they're just staying above ground but that's because they bought a house that was too expensive not using rooms in that house and they don't have the humility to sell that house and go back to rent because they don't want their friend from high school or their grandma to judge them because we manifested that you have to own a home and if you did and now you're not just staying above water and you sold that home and moved into a shittier neighborhood or a smaller house or rented now your actual life can open up but no the ideology of owning a home and the inability to take a step backwards to text three steps forward is going to make you unhappy till the end yes [Applause] from the extreme of getting somebody in here this evening to go home and sell their [ __ ] house to getting to getting to getting one of you to not buy a pair of off-whites that you can't afford in those two extremes are no different than [ __ ] sallypants98 to your mom this is a game of the edges this is a game of the edges everybody's focused in the middle 90 95 99 of the [ __ ] you think about and you consumes in the middle so you don't pay attention to the edges it's a [ __ ] game of the edges once you get your relationship down with the seven [ __ ] people that matter the most in your life and actually get to the place of saying i love you but [ __ ] you and once you get to that same relationship over here which is super simple i'm not sure i even know you and [ __ ] you that's the game now don't confuse [ __ ] you let me explain what i mean i roll with empathy and compassion and sympathy this isn't [ __ ] you for hate this is i'm not willing to live my life under your judgment of what life is because eventually let me tell you the biggest mistake people make that i've observed through the millions of interactions over the last decade that i consume there are people right now that are living their life still in their 40s and 50s based on the opinion of their parents they think they're doing the right thing because they [ __ ] actually love their parents i get it i love my parents so uncomfortably much it scares me but they live it because they're appeasing lawyer two kids living in this area doing this job don't take risks because we told you not to we came from a generation that didn't so you're doing that or i was once an entrepreneur and [ __ ] it up and so we were scared so now you don't do that they live for their parents they think it's good because everything's good because you're doing what your parents want you feel like it's good and then life keeps going and then what starts happening is they start to resent their parents because now they're popping to their 50th birthday their 60th birthday their 65th birthday they get a health scare and they're like [ __ ] i'm not doing what i want to be doing my friends until our society and this country especially redefine success in being happy not being rich everybody will continue to go down the path that we're seeing in our society of depression anxiety drugs i believe it the most do i believe that there's people here that are lucky that are talented and love something and they build a business that he actually loved that process and it makes them a lot of wealth yes i do they're i'm one of them i genuinely love my [ __ ] i love it the most thank god it also manifested in financial success but if you watched my behavior you would realize it's the chase when and if the jets win the super bowl before i buy them [Applause] i'm probably when and if the jets win the super bowl before i buy them you're gonna see a video of like 61 year old me being [ __ ] now i gotta buy the knicks what i realized about me about why do i love garage sailing why have i probably rolled up some people in this room's house to buy [ __ ] over the last 10 years is because i love the hunt i wake up at five o'clock in the morning on a saturday after working 90 hours a week because my hobby is to go to [ __ ] old wick town wide sale or [ __ ] metuchen's town wise sale two times a year to go through people's trash and buy [ __ ] for a dollar that's worth seven not because of the dollar and the seven but because maybe just maybe this is the day that i roll up on somebody's house and find a rare 1947 cracker jack green lantern ring worth 80 000 and even the 80 000 doesn't mean [ __ ] i get paid more to stand right here than that i just want the [ __ ] hunt you

Channel: Gary Vaynerchuk Fan Page

Views: 1,017,024

Rating: 4.9314198 out of 5

Keywords: Gary Vaynerchuk, Business, Entrepreneur, Garyvee, speech, talk, new, gary vaynerchuk 2020, gary vaynerchuk motivation, gary vee, garyvee motivation, motivation, gary vee fan page, gary vaynerchuk fan page, How To Stop Being A People Pleaser Right Now, stop being a people pleaser, people pleaser syndrome, how to stop being a people pleaser and take control of your life, stop people pleasing, garyvee stop caring what others think, garyvee stop judging yourself

Id: 3XQnW5yW8Xs

Length: 12min 57sec (777 seconds)

Published: Tue Aug 18 2020