How To Make Yourself Understood Every Time! (r/AskReddit)

our slash asked ribbit people who can express themselves clearly and make themselves understood whenever you open your mouth how the hell do you do that I'm better at expressing how I feel now than when I was younger for me personally formal higher education actually helped a lot spending multiple hours a day hearing other people discuss and express relatively complex thoughts made it easier to find ways to express my own thoughts I was going to say make sure you use the right words but actually it's make sure you use the right words for the right audience not everyone is at the same level of comprehension so knowing what works for who is one huge hurdle to get over first read a lot it gives people a much better command of language and abroad a library of ideas to draw from when expressing their own thoughts on the other hand as Steve Martin said some people have a way with words other people not have way practice arguments help as well debating skills are actually quite useful in being able to articulate what you're feeling into actual words it's not uncommon for even well-spoken people to fall apart when they are under pressure they can think of what to say before and after but when they are under the gun they can't spit it out practice makes perfect learn how to listen we'd a lot especially nonfiction no one is born articulate as with everything you learn from seeing good examples of other people explaining themselves clearly bad examples also help you see what not to do we've all read muddled articles and had that one professor who can speak for an hour and not get a single point across I'm introvert tried to force myself to be extrovert didn't work so after some time I realized few things back slash I can take time to collect my thoughts and answer as clearly as I want / can back slash less words are always better if they convey the message clearly this is very easy medicine to get into it also doesn't drain me because this is how I am in my career I have always been offered management / leading role very early and I think this is a reason why my answers and directions make sense are easy to understand and easy to follow according to my bosses slash cow workers you need to understand your audience there's no one-size-fits-all for expressing a point no matter how smart you are explain something the way you would want it explained to you edit yes of course you have to give leeway for you knowing more than the others it is also more along the lines putting yourself in the other person's shoes and then looking at the question retrospectively the idea will not be to blow your own horn but to help someone else understand in a way that you would want to understand will you at the stage they are at if you make a habit of typing clearly eloquently and with proper grammar it will influence the way you think if you type like every letter is a Herculean effort and your life depends on sending that text quickly then that's how you will express yourself generally as well review everything you write edit it and don't hit Send or post until it says exactly what you mean I guarantee that will make speaking eloquently much easier as you will become used to forming Chris clear thoughts you'll also find yourself stopping and considering what you're about to say before you say it become an Dungeons & Dragons DM I started a lot when I was younger I usually think the sentence in my head before saying it moreover how can you not cry when you argue knowing what you can and cannot articulate I engage only in subjects I'm familiar with I was badly abused as a child by my mother my siblings I was bullied at school by both kids and teachers at one point I had almost stopped talking I was so shy that I would cry if strangers talked to me I wasn't scared of them I was scared to speak I left school at 15 my mother threw me out I got a job and somewhere to live I swore I would never let anyone bully me into silence again I put myself through college one of the subjects that was available along with a unit of corporate law was conflict resolution I found my voice I just covered I'm a feisty one and extremely articulate nothing I learned before or since has been more useful I could mediate a trade union dispute without a hitch but do you think I could solve a dispute over a toy between my toddler's not a snowball's chance in hell just keep going like just keep talking it prob sounds awkward only to you think before you speak if it hasn't been said yet read books preferably any type that has conversations in it this will do at least two bones it will drastically increase your vocabulary so you can be more precise with your word choice and by virtue of essentially giving sound to the conversation in your own head you will be experimenting with how things sound between two or more people this is a form of creative thinking and will exercise your ability to think about how other people will hear your words reading will also change your life in a thousand ways that you might or may not notice but almost always for the better confidence also I took a public speaking class but if you're not a confident person it's hard I sold my soul of the age of eight language listening to people who experienced something similar to what I did so it feels like the same perspective but they're using words I never would have different people have come into my life or movies or shows that have been personal motivational tools and I get hooked on how some people can express themselves watching and learning and taking notes on others expressing their own self has helped me find the language and courage to do the same for myself I spent a huge portion of my childhood arguing with people older than me yawns barks live it helped me gain the ability to quickly articulate my point and hammer at home as quick as possible conciseness helps you don't always need to use a lot of words instead you need the right words I just be do the things I mean to say and be do and and there you go I've gone and be done it something I would recommend is communicating with friends or family through voice recordings when I first started it may have been to talk for two minutes straight I can't really remember now I can easily hit 15 minutes with clarity and have probably made hundreds of recording and listen to hundreds as well from my friends or family it's also not bad practice to listen to your own recordings often you will get to see how you sound what do you like about it and what you want to improve talk clearly no mumbling or talking quietly don't lie or step around what you're talking about if you don't understand what you're talking about then don't bother to look smart and explain it in a way that people can understand no big words to make yourself look smart read a fuckload books the beauty isn't understanding your audience if your message isn't understood that's on you not the recipient years of talking to yourself careful practice and logical effort spending a moment listening before speaking helps considering language internal choices is useful recognizing when you're being heard vs when you're talking at somebody and a bit of Education mom taught deaf kids dad was a great and skillful natural communicator with charisma route the but following their lead and getting to be a better listener made me an improved communicator and trying to understand why I'm not being heard when I'm not is key reading for the full understanding the context of every word then you can use it to listening for faster uptake of content practicing mindfulness for clearing your thoughts and not being confused with a lot of information get over your anxiety not by pushing yourself to the dangerous situations work with past situations watching Netflix detective TV series everyone in police or everyone anyone who wants to masterfully create an alibi they are God imperfect speakers that guy in your mirror he's cool try to speak with him he knows the other clues don't say fillers like and stuff you know but whatever well not adding things other than your point makes everything you say more punctual as well as makes you appear more confident in what you re laying don't be afraid of pauses it's good to think before you speak and most people will not only wait as you pause but they will also respect you for forming sentences mindfully some people will get impatient because they don't actually care about what you have to say and communication will be harder with them it's also completely acceptable to say hold on let me think about that so they know to wait and then form your thought and say to them and some people act like you taking their minutes by making them wait is disrespectful but they have an unhealthy perspective about their own importance and the value of silence it's okay not to cater to those people most will respect you and enjoy the thoughtful things you have to say confidence rooted in the belief that your thoughts are valid and your concerns a legitimate reading and writing a lot gives you a better grasp of language pacing yourself active listening is an important communication skill as well if you know and understand your audience well then you can speak to them in better ways I stopped being scared of what people think especially my parents because apparently voicing a logical opinion is considered disrespect also presentations in high school and university I learned people will only listen if what you say interests them so I learned to make everything I say interesting just you mmm you know be smart about words and think stuff you know what I mean read a lot of books think about what you are going to say before you say it say what your audience wants to hear say what they feel but can't come sure into words while being and predictable it takes a lot of practice a good grasp of language and always trying to extend my vocabulary reading definitely helps with that I love that suddenly everyone is replying with perfect punctuation so transparent think first point brevity Eman ESL /l professional and I found that my tips for my students have really helped me with my own ability to express myself and with public speaking learn to slow your brain down before you speak organize your thoughts as much as possible don't be nervous to ask your conversation partner for a second to collect your thoughts before you respond use a thoughtful pause to take a beat the best public speakers know how to make a pause work for them finally when you feel your brain moving faster than your mouth too many thoughts and inability to correctly put words to them focus on what they are saying for a bit bullet points that's the best advice I can dispense write down in short bullets the main arguments and read them out loud consciously and clearly once you feel it is coherent go for eating it in front of a few people try to peer through their responses and see which points need some tinkering to make them clearer the more opportunities you take to prepare for expressing yourself the less you'll feel the need to as it will come more naturally eventually this is essential skill and no one is born with it thanks for watching if you enjoyed this video give it a thumbs up and subscribe to the channel for more videos just like this one

Channel: Horsing Around

Views: 19

Rating: 5 out of 5

Keywords: reddit askreddit, funny askreddit, askreddit scary, askreddit school, askreddit truth or dare stories, comments from reddit, stories from reddit, horsing around, reddit horsing around, best of reddit, askreddit top posts, askreddit best posts, reddit top posts, askreddit how to, askreddit tutorial

Id: GX7VbtFWjF0

Length: 12min 6sec (726 seconds)

Published: Fri Jun 05 2020