How To EASILY Handle People Picking On You - Jocko Willink

there was this other topic that I kind of wanted to bring up that was from once again it was from jock alive and and there was a young woman and again this this goes to the kind of variety of different people that were coming uncle lives were all over the place so this this young woman asked a question that was kind of like how do you pan and I can't when you're at the live events there's light shining in your eyes so you're not really a hundred percent sure you don't get it it's not like you're not seeing the person face to face so I'm kind of looking out into the light I'm seeing this frame of a young woman and she asked something along the lines of you know how do you handle when there's people that are trying to pull you down and and and you know pick you apart hmm and I said well what do you do and she's like I'm in school and I said what school and she's in high school and I said what grade and she said I'm a freshman and I said okay so you're getting bullied right because essentially that's what that's what she was saying right I'm getting poked at picked on I got people trying to drag me down what you know what that's called that's called bullying I said so you're getting bullied and she said yes getting bullied so I said I said you know I thought about it for a second I said well I've got some bad news and I've got some good news and I'm gonna start with the bad news the bad news is that people can be mean and they can be mean for a variety of reasons they can be mean because they're insecure they can be mean because they're bullied themselves they can be mean because they're unhappy they can be mean because they're scared to be vulnerable so they put up that front they might be suffering and jealous and have no self-esteem it's the way some people are and there's some people that are just evil that get joy out of putting other people down so there's all those kind of people exist and they especially exist inside of immature people in high school so that's the bad news and then I said but the good news is high school is not life and when I said that it was actually funny when I said that like people started clapping because everyone in that room knew that it was true and that reminded me of another conversation that I've been having with people lately about about some about ecosystems something I've called eco systems so little ecosystems in the world that people get caught up in and they get caught trying to get to the top hierarchy of some little ecosystem somewhere and look I get it you know I get it Jordan Jordan Peterson was trying to ascend the top of our dominance hierarchy be the best you can I totally get that mm-hmm absolutely but we there's there can be a problem with this from multiple angles the world is filled with these little ecosystems and high school is one of them remember the little high school ecosystem there's someone that's popular there's someone that's you know there's all these little feet there's this ecosystem there and high school this is something you know you you look at a high school kid and you you try and explain to them that once you left high school no one really cares right correct if you care about it deeply you're actually uncle Rico right you know that's running around saying when I was in high school this and when I was in high school that but here's the problem and this is one of the reasons when I wrote way the warrior kid one one of the things that triggered me to write it was you know here I was at work war going on being real legitimate crazy problems and and dynasties and dynamics to figure out like things are going on and I come home and like my one of my kids would be sad that they got called the name mm-hmm or sad that they got a low grade on a test or whatever and I would be thinking like I I had a moment of clarity where I thought I can't believe they're I can't believe they're sad about this who cares and then I realized oh yeah idiot jock oh yeah that thing that's going on in their world is their whole world it's the Eco to see it's their entire their entire world is in that one ecosystem so it's hard for people to realize that their ecosystem that they're in is not the whole world it's the same thing with when you start going to college and I've got two kids in college now you know this whole ecosystem around first getting into college and once you get to college with you know where you're gonna get your MBA where you're doing your internship there's this whole thing right and once again if you step outside that ecosystem into just the normal world no one actually cares about where you got your degree yeah not no one because there's a little peep there's a group of people inside that ecosystem that they they go where'd you get your MBA Oh where'd you study you know and there's people that care about that there's other people that literally do not care at all yeah and I meet incredibly like from that perspective I mean incredibly successful business leaders all the time that don't have their MBA and went to some State School in Iowa I got props the other day from someone from Iowa that said whenever you think of that state yes from Iowa some state school and I whatever some little Community College in Nebraska and they go out in world and dominate so but that's not important we know that that happens look and there's people that go to Ivy League schools and get and they do great too but what I'm saying is they get in this little ecosystem where where what they're actually trying to do is onto the top of that ecosystem only for the sake of climbing to the top of that custom not how it measures into the greater world what kind of car do you have there's an ecosystem you can get wrapped up in you know I've got of my Porsche is better than your Porsche right there's people that are into that and there's other people that I do not care at all at all what about our little ecosystems we're right what did you do has a little own little ecosystem yep you know what I'm saying there's a little ecosystem who's who what the the podcast were old yeah has an ecosystem so all these things and those are just things that that you and I are actually actively in right we do jujitsu and we have a podcast so we could jump into like where you add on the hierarchy of these ecosystems and again Jordan I get it we're trying to we're trying to go up the hierarchy I get it but you have to be able to put that in check cuz why are you doing that what is driving you if it's if what's driving you to ascend that hierarchy is because it's gonna make a you better and the people around you better that's good if you're doing it for your own ego though that's a problem mm-hmm that's where it becomes a problem guess what the jobs or the companies the industries they get created they're sort of the jobs that get created by companies and industries they have their own little ecosystem right about I work here I work there I will I ran this region like you can see it it's an ecosystem that exists the SEAL Teams is a freaking ecosystem and everyone's in there going like okay where you add on the ecosystem where did you we know how many deployments if you don't where did you deploy to what what schools have you been to there's a little ecosystem that people are trying to get out and it's and I get it there's some positive to that right because you're trying to do better trying to work harder that's good then there's this thing the bar scene you probably can relate to this better than me there's an ecosystem of the yes and who's the owner and who's the manager and who's the GM and who's the head door guy yeah and who comes in your club oh who you gonna let in the club music scene real estate there's this ecosystems everywhere and so this is the point that I guess I'm getting to and where it ties back into this young female that asked this question when you what you have to do is realize that in most of these cases when you step outside of that little ecosystem no one cares about that ecosystem no one cares mmm no one cares if I was to tell my mom hey mom I got my black belt in jujitsu 2005 hey mom I got my black belt in jujitsu she well you know what would you know what she would say Oh congratulations know what she's thinking that I'm in a strip mall doing karate somewhere you know what I mean yeah that's what she's thinking she doesn't care at all she doesn't care at all mm-hmm your Porsche that you told me about I can introduce you to many people that think if you spent more than five thousand dollars on a vehicle you're an idiot never mind a hundred and fifty thousand dollars in fact if you ever hear me brag about a vehicle the vehicle that I brag about probably the most is my 1997 Dodge Grand Caravan that's the one I brag about the most mm-hmm so when you step outside the ecosystem of cool cars people literally don't do not care the the music scene oh I know this recording artist I know oh and I'm going to this studio it's like no one cares so my point in saying this is if you find yourself distraught about your failure inside some random ecosystem then remember that if you can detach and you can step outside that ecosystem you can realize that that ecosystem in most cases doesn't even matter at all hmm it doesn't matter at all

Channel: Jocko Podcast

Views: 829,120

Keywords: discipline, freedom, military, extreme ownership, leadership, advice, jocko willink, echelon front, navy seal, jocko podcast, excerpt, echo charles, leader, lead, win, defcor, discipline equals freedom

Id: dMdeDsonuqI

Length: 11min 10sec (670 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 10 2020