HOW SMOSH BEAT DEFY - SmoshCast #1

and it's an email saying that we've all been effective immediately laid off people were smashing defy mugs with baseball I know I know that Jake Paul calls former smashing debris at the apt and we were all we were all single on Valentine's I know dude hey everybody welcome to the first ever Smosh cast whoa well it's already off to a great who are you oh that's oh Jesus my name is Ian Hecox I'm Courtney Miller I'm Shane top we are some of the people that are on a youtube channel called Smosh yeah yeah you might have heard of it may-maybe they've been around for a few years there yeah there's a lot of things to talk about I guess the big thing on people's minds and probably we probably click bated the title you know I don't know yet is where the heck have we been in the past 3-4 months and back yeah it's been hell it's been a journey jeez let's just take us all the way back to November November it was like November early November it was the first couple weeks of November yeah so we were we were all working at her at her parent company defy which most people know by now and everyone's in love with them oh yeah they're the best company to have ever existed they have a great reputation I would say they're up there with the greats like Enron the devil corporation devil core nope Satan Corp Wow whichever corporation made the terminators well there goes our Apple sponsorships so back in November October who knows because this feels like an an eon ago yeah we got a lovely and this is completely out of the blue we did know we were in the middle of a writer's meeting us yeah it happens and like there were like rumblings around the office that that things weren't too great and there were people that were starting to trickle out of the company mind you for the past year before that every couple months there'd be just mad of layoffs and like 30 people would lose their job and we'd all be like oh my god this sucks we'd our budget kept getting cut and cut until we were like we're shooting sketches with nothing so basically we're just hanging out and then all of a sudden we get this email that's like everyone get on the phone in 30 minutes emergency meeting yes and so so here like oh that probably can't be good I don't think I don't think I rise the gravity of it but our head writer immediately was just like well all right start packing up your thing he literally like with us it's over and I was like whoa it's just a phone call we don't know that but boy did he call it yeah yeah so we got on the call and and they're like well by California law we have to let everyone know that we're giving you a 60-day notice yes we had till January 2nd yes my god to to you know find your work till then you find another job so everyone's like gosh that that really sucks but at least we have till January to figure out you know and that was a Friday yeah so weekend happens obviously not not a good weekend nobody sleeps yeah and Monday comes around and we're still sort of working you know trucking along I'm writing a script and and then we get an email I remember exactly what I was doing I was in the writers room with Matt Robb and a couple other people I think it's like some smoshgames people and we get this email and it shows up on on Matt's computer and he's like yes his email and it's an email saying that we've all been effective immediately laid off yeah everybody at once everybody like go get your paycheck in this yes yeah goodbye yeah so funny thing was because I don't know I felt like it was a moment that I needed to remember I was like selfie oh my god I remember I took a photo some dark humor and like I think in the photo and yours like I wasn't there actually what I was I was working I was filming on the Goldbergs and I got home and I got the text I saw the text as soon as I got home of like hey everybody got laid out it's over and I was like oh my god and I quickly got all my stuff together and I drove all the way in the office and by the time I got there all the sadness had dissipated and now the party started yeah yeah so there there was an immense amount of delirium after after the layoffs so nobody knew what to do I I was writing a script so I was like well I don't think Smosh is really gonna be over so I guess I might as well finish this script so I'm just gonna sat there and finish the script I forget now it's these past couple nights been a blur a little bit so some people went out and God's got a fair amount of booze yeah and we we were supposed to shoot the very next day so we had a whole bunch of crafty and snacks yeah every dominos ever yeah we have a bunch of Domino's yes but yeah there was tons of food laid out whatever I brought I think I brought some beer full disclosure I was like all right I'm gonna grab a six-pack bring it over to the office yeah and yeah people were sad but it was one of those things it was kind of like kind of felt like a high school graduation or a college graduation words like we had spent so much time here together doing crazy stuff and then it was over immediately we I was expecting to continue to work there for a long time I and suddenly and you know yeah there was that optimism in my head and all of us were saying oh it's not over it's gonna come back but at the time really thinking back on it it very likely could have been completely over at them I think there is still there was still some hope because because when that first the termination of everyone happened there were all of us kind of gathered in the smush room and like everyone was like really down a couple people had speeches I you have footage from that moment I feel very bad that I was like I'm gonna film this right now I just felt I was just like that'd be so weird to have footage of this moment and Matt Robb of Smosh games was like he came in and gave this amazing speech I almost wish I had filmed that but like we were like this isn't over like that just because this is happening like we are to to like we're doing too well and we are to together with this so like yeah so there was still hope and like still a chance we were all still gonna be together but it was still like end of the world feeling - what was the real kicker - was that we had had our best week ever the week all right like we literally had like we were planning a celebration I actually because we had Smosh main Smosh pit both had their the best views ever and subscriptions were up like Earth it was up six hundred percent everything was doing great so we were like oh my god we're we've never been more successful and then suddenly oh we're all now out of a job so the party turned into a little bit of a show some people started breaking some things I won't say if things actually happen but I say mayhaps yes yes people stole things mayhaps there was damage done but hey I don't know and mayhaps somebody and I don't know who I heard peed in one of the like the one of the guys I was essentially running the company I heard that somebody peed in his office oh my god oh my god I fully believe it that's yeah and like mayhaps people were smashing défi mugs with baseball I know I know that yeah I know about that and that's I heard that someone so crazy that somebody like used a plunger on one of the computers what they took a wonder too one of the CEOs computers who would do that yeah I don't think anybody has video okay I just can't believe someone needing that's crazy yeah that and that guy and that guy never show never showed back up to the yeah to be to be fair these this the the leaders of defy you know don't say names but they fired everyone and then didn't talk face to face with anyone didn't didn't didn't show up didn't show up and I was like really bummed about that I was like okay cuz I was trying to learn a lot about just being a leader and and what's it like to do business as I had never worked as an office place before and I was just really bummed sounds like that just seems like really poor leadership skills because part of being a leader is yeah you're gonna fail sometimes and even if it's a massive failure you got to own it and they really didn't know bummed me out the the large issue for me add to Phi was the leadership yeah you know I and I told people before I felt like defi was just kind of rotten at the top and you know we had we had huge issues with with the person that was directly above us mmm-hmm and I went over him to to tell the other the the higher higher-ups I was like hey look this guy's a problem he's terrible for the culture he's you know he's people are leaving yeah because of his leadership yeah and I got a response I was like you know nobody nobody cares about Smosh more than us we're gonna do something about this and they did nothing know what I will say though a cool thing was that the three and a half years that we were there it there was a bond that all of us had Smosh had because we were kind of all put in this part of the office we never really saw I didn't see many of these corporate types that were in control of it but we banded together and we were always trying to make great stuff we're always having fun and doing crazy [ __ ] and we all had this kind of common enemy we were kind of like uh these corporate overlords that are always it felt like an 80s movie it did they were we were The Breakfast Club and defi was the principal that would come in every now and then back stop having fun you got to do this whatever like okay it was tough because they didn't have a sense of humor they didn't understand what somebody it was a really weird dynamic like I was saying this earlier it feels like a bunch of theater kids were just like put into a cubicle yeah I got to give him credit like we were able to do a lot of stuff and we were able to use a lot of reason yeah so I mean like I can't I can't completely dumped on define like they they got us to where we are at we just needed better leadership we needed a company that was that was actually behind us yeah rather than just kind of like they're yeah really not really doing anything to kind of like help push us forward or create like a seem to hold us back sometimes in terms of relationships with other youtubers well yeah cuz I mean I know I know there were definitely some some youtubers that wouldn't work with us because we were right because they yeah and they've talked about that in their on their channels like yeah it's not so so that happened that all happened and then you know because because the way that the company was shut down it was complete anarchy like then there was nobody there was nobody saying like okay now you don't have jobs this is what you're doing there is there is nobody deciding what would happen with the channels the channels were locked at first nobody could even get into him not even here right yeah yeah so yeah so also we came back the next day or somebody came back the next day and there was an eviction notice yeah but on the door my god yeah so it's like and it's like who do we tell about please yeah we have no idea we had no idea who to look to like all our stuff was still in there all of our props all of our costumes yeah because you you need some sort of guy and it's like they were just like okay like get out but like they also left like so yeah the other one they weren't even there they were technically fired too cuz the company was just crumbling yeah I'm not I'm not totally sure no idea yeah but it was there was there was no turn - no there was no structure at all within a day yep basically had to just take things in our own hands I contacted somebody I was like hey do you have access to the channel and then I got access to the channel yeah cuz it was like we had like a full week of just I was just at my apartment like all right so I'm chilling now doing nothing and then we all were like okay we're gonna meet up at Ian's place and talk and maybe film something because let's let's keep making videos but it was there was something kind of cool about then knowing we're going into this phase where hey we're gonna make videos just us from scratch and I was like this is kind of cool cuz this is kind of where the channel started from yeah like forever ago you and Anthony just decided to film videos the two of you and it blew up from there and after becoming this massive thing it was kind of going through I kept saying when it was all happening it was very sad but I kept be like guys this is kind of like Avengers - yeah I'm like Avengers Tower crumbles and we got a gun scrap together and do it ourselves it really felt like a cheesy that's what we ended up doing like yeah you know one of the things that was sort of like validating for me was the fact that everyone came together and helped and you know we had some people come out and shoot for us just cuz they had always they had always shot with us there you know they believed in what we were doing I mean I paid some editors out-of-pocket I just you know the the show had to go on yeah yeah we filmed some videos on my iPhone I edited those on Final Cut yeah yeah we all did a little extra I had to learn how to upload a YouTube again because I'm so different from what it used to be yeah yeah cuz I mean like look I like I know like people people at home are like wow you don't upload your own videos you're totally out of touch but look when you have like four channels and you have to schedule those uploads and you have to make sure all the metadata is there multiple loads a week yeah you need somebody to do that on call so much work man and I realized that very quickly yeah because I man some thumbnails that I decided to that I thought I could make oh yeah I'm taking a crack you know like some argh okay like but it's a lot of times like those those some nails a lot of work goes into the ones that we have on those channels so much hard work I have immense respect for people yeah all by themselves yeah I don't know how they do it it's insane yeah I think a lot of youtubers that we don't realize have people helping them behind the scenes do but there are still youtubers who do everything by themselves just crazy yeah and then months kept going by and we were we would meet up every now and then and film stuff and it was really fun and we were still holding onto hope of like this is all gonna come back yeah everything's gonna come back the same and I mean at least for me I can speak you know get got into December and like towards late December I was like alright this this may be over I was like scary this is starting to get scary because we were we were in silence we were we had radio silence because Ian couldn't yeah tell us really what was happening but there was so much happening yeah so I I thought I I didn't have any sort of control over what was going to happen cuz you know we had we had sold Smosh years and years and years ago if I summoned if I went out of business then it was in the hands of the bank and it was just gonna be sold to the highest bidder essentially so the monopoly man Smosh yeah so I mean I realized after like a week or so I'm like wait a second like every moment that I that I'm sitting here not trying to figure out a way to pull this out I'm wasting so I hired a consultant that was a guy that I knew we started trying to find a way build a business plan and essentially like pitch Smosh to investors and try to pull together like an investing PETA get the monies to to buy it and it was really it was weird man like I got like a crash course in like business stuff yeah we're like we're like going to these like like meetings where there's like this like investor guy that invested in all these like tech companies and he's sitting there he's like all right what you got he's got a cigar all right what you got kid yeah show me the stuff I've heard of this YouTube thing sounds hot so yeah it was it was really exciting and and it was another validating thing where all these investors we were talking to actually knew what Smosh was and that was the only reason why we got like seat time with them because they didn't need to give us the time of day but it was sort of validating like this thing that we've built actually has you know value yeah this thing you put over a decade in actually kind of means something yeah cool but the problem was the time that that we had to get it was just too little of a time so as that was going along we were starting to realize like less and less like we might not be able to get together this like group of investors and then we also kind of realized as we're going like okay even if we get the investors I won't have a controlling share this company and it'll be controlled by some random people yeah so that was that was starting to be a little bit scary that kind of fell through and then there was some other companies that were thinking about acquiring it one particularly bad one actually almost got it had some foreign clear like in the lead right like yeah yeah some foreign company in there their whole plan was like okay here's what we're gonna do we're gonna take Smosh and we're gonna just hire a bunch of other people in other countries and start like new smosh's there so like we're gonna go to Thailand we're gonna we're gonna find some talented Thai boys and we're gonna we're gonna and they're just gonna be like Thai Smosh we're gonna spread Smosh across the world like a plague we're gonna infect every country with Smosh so I so that didn't happen yeah the idea that they wanted to like take that control and start doing that stuff like yeah and I had a whole bunch of the terrible ideas there's this freaking guy that was kind of leading it he was like I mean like there's all these things we could do with merch like like really wacky things like we could sell a Smosh straw but it like doesn't work and it's like that would get like a article in like the New York Times oh no I'm like hey you know how straws are polluting the world how do we do that better yeah how do we troll the planet more that he was like pitching these like wacky crazy ideas trash it's just already trash but it's $29.99 take it stupid issues one of the issues of that is that that's somebody that thinks that Smosh is a kid's channel it's like oh it's like a wacky crazy fun time it's like it's it's really but it really is the approach of so many business types when it comes to honestly when it comes to YouTube in general yeah that is like it's so hard for them to grasp that mature people like this like people actually and I don't know they think of it as this just Nick jr. thing cuz they see the slime videos they're like oh so everybody on YouTube is a kid it's a hey and even if even for people who are kids who are watching this they're smarter than that yeah more mature than that yeah 12 year olds don't want a straw that doesn't work yeah and then and then yeah his his whole argument was like well there's a there's like akb48 which is the 48 member jayx pop band and and he's like well then they went off and made like a Vietnamese version of that I'm like yep but that's a format like Smosh is a brand it's it's it's people making a certain kind of comedy like a family Smosh isn't a format you can't just put that onto like other things so thankfully in the freaking zero hour rhett and Link come and save the goddamn day all like like I don't remember I don't know it was like well we got a call with them and and we essentially told them what we thought the price was and the responses I think we could do that that's such a rhettandlink response well I think we can do that that's my read and Lincoln president this this whole like these the past like three or four months was a rollercoaster of emotion whereas like one day it was like you know we'd have a good meeting with somebody would be like it's this is this is gonna be the thing and then next day we get like an email back like I'm sorry just in the time we can't do it and it's like everything's gone to [ __ ] were all screwed yeah and it was just literally every day was like we're gonna make it we're dead and then make it dead that's why you never told us really what was going well obviously we're under an NDA for the the stuff but also since it was a a rollercoaster I know honestly if you were telling me every day that that stuff was happening I probably would have cried like twice as much because that's like scary and you yeah you basically told us you didn't want us to have false hope a lot of times yeah yeah and it was also it was gonna to a point we'd hear about you know we'd hear about these companies and the one we were talking about and when I would hear about that in my head I'm like even if it gets you know bought by this company I don't know how I feel about signing on to it if it's gonna be another defy exact gonna be another one of those situations because I love this job and I love Smosh but when working I was like oh but what if we controlled even more yeah then defy then it's not gonna be fun when I'm gonna get to do what we love I mean cuz I knew for a long time like wanted to be more like creatively involved and not just writing and and being in the videos like I had all these ideas all the time and so I would go to somebody at defy and be like I have this idea say was a show or merch or whatever and like they huh cute okay go back to get your makeup for the video bye bye like very dismissed and already you like it's been such a short amount of time and I feel so involved and I really feel like I'm helping Smosh a little more the reality now is that it's kind of just us doing our yeah that link we're like here's this studio we have do whatever you want I mean that's because rhett and Link have succeeded because they're in control like they the the thing that I love the most about about mythical which is their company is that they don't have any investors they own it yeah which is huge that was that was the big concern when when we were trying to thinking about getting investors for Smosh you're not in complete control but they are so they're smart enough to know that you know it worked for them it could work for us like you know you could say it's like the partner Avengers we're doomed but then rhett and Link our vision come in and they save everything and you know they have a vision and they had a vision for us and dreams come true so for Ultron was a lot sexier than if I Oh word I wouldn't yeah I don't really remember age of Ultron I just kind of blocked that out it's just kind of there it is just kind of there it's really just kind of there yeah okay well I liked it so I like it it's but it's just kind of there because Avengers 1 and Avengers infinity warriors are both just yeah it's it's like a you know yeah I was like I said it's like a sandwich except the bread is the good part oh you know it's like I don't really care about the turkey and capaci but I like the bread the turkey and the what caprese okay I guess you wouldn't have Turkey and caprese it'd be a caprese saying sorry welcome to Smosh Italy basically we came very very close to ending up in a in a really terrible situation and I made it clear that if we were to end up with another defy I was not going to go along with it and it would be very likely that nobody else would go along with it as well although I did think it would be pretty funny if like everybody dropped out except for Keith yeah I'm Keith just running Smosh on his own just making like tons of money crushes he's the next Jeff Bezos like a lot of people on social media throughout this process we're like why do you guys need a new parent company like why do you need that all you guys can do it on your own and like they're kind of right but there was the whole aspect just to answer that was you needed to get it out of jail first like you needed to buy although we couldn't wash from the monopoly man yeah it wasn't ours yeah like just to even get supper and I think this is like a the dream team situation where like this is as close to being our own company as it could possibly get but it's like safer and like like friend links people are like giving advice and trying to help us like hair this is some ideas and like to be better but like you don't have to do this if you don't want like it's it's like a very collaborative thing it like when that does happen but for the most part it's been like us like there's no like creative director that's telling us like you need to make a science show or a nature show and those were those were cool shows like they were awesome but like they were is kind of that he wanted to do like going like well TV's pretty cool so we can make a TV show right let's be TLC yeah why not and like I had fun cuz yeah they they came to me one day and were like hey we're gonna have you do a science show called Smosh lab and I was like okay they're like yeah cuz you're you'll be like the science one I'm like I don't know anything about science but okay and and like a lot of likes a lot of like the show but it was weird though because it was not my idea at all and I felt weird in the show sometimes cuz I'm like I don't know what I'm doing I'm just gonna try to be silly here but stuff like that would happen and it was always it was always trippy whereas now we get to really kind of come up with what we want to do and organically create it there was so much content I remember when we had all those shows we were releasing videos every single day and some channels do that like like sugar pine they sugar pine seven releases video every single day and it's them doing it like I don't understand how they do it but like we were doing that with these crazy well produced shows that were so polished like we I remember won't eat your show had like six cameras at one point like on one set and they wouldn't they weren't doing well overall because because I feel like it didn't show us off it's not authentic yeah we were given a lot of lines were like this isn't like you and Olivia don't have like any you know like you didn't have any animal content like for that everybody likes yeah almost but you weren't like hey check out this awesome snake that I love so much well yeah and here's the thing to like say somebody saw whoa nature shows like oh my god I love this subscribe and then the next day they're like what is this one hour song machine I'm not into this music show yeah well what is this science show this isn't what I subscribed for and and I and meantime we had done a challenge like 2000 early 2017 called try not to laugh and it blew up and it did really well and for forever we were like hey we should do more of those and they were just always like we don't we don't think we it wouldn't work if we kept doing it whatever and we were always like yeah but it did really well we probably should do it again it was really fun we finally finally started getting the chance to do them and then of course they blew up and it was just a matter of because they were they had the show all these shows I said well this is just more I think they had every day a different kind of show because they wanted to have every possible kind of show that a brand would want to advertise on that's it seems like they was just like oh we just have lots of product that you can shop yeah it's it's its packaging something into a specific show so that you can sell it to an advertiser later yeah and it's just when you're when you're thinking about selling an ad first before the content scary it's kind of yeah and we've this week already was the first week who got and we got two shoots mosh pit stuff and already you and I were like hey let's do a show where we just talk about dating like let's talk about how we're we're awkward on dates whatever and how can you tell me about this who's interested in buying it see okay Cupid we need some gold bars but yeah that was so cool was just something we wanted to do were like we want to try and it was just yes is all around everyone just like yeah go for it like we there's just so much opportunity already in like everyone's just it wears it's so much more creatively stimulating it's also it also looks so much better here this studio space is so much cooler looking than the DMV that we used to work in unlimited avocados in the kitchen just okay and unlimited unlimited Lucroy I know insane we rationed off our Lacroix I killed a man over a Lacroix Beckett to five which is perfectly acceptable it was perfectly fine it defi had a you're allowed to murder other people for Lacroix rule yes well there was one laminated slightly flavored beverage man this other guy I you know I think he was an editor we opened up the fridge there was one Lacroix we looked at each other I grabbed a pole wouldn't a wooden rod broken in half he grabbed a champagne bottle broke that and we just we just battled it out who uh Star Trek style who died uh well he died no he actually he was okay he recovered from his wounds and I went him in the hospital was like sorry buddy he was like how was it I was like it was alright it was pom-pom it's not my favorite coconut is the worst that's not a terrible scream the only one I can't stand honestly is just the original no flavor is a dumb thing I can get with who has just carpet carbonated water without flavor is weird it's weird I'm sorry I've never liked it I've never liked Konya water water water do you know anyone that says water word or no or lower lower Washington worse Wersching there's a girl in my high school that that would say wash well I think she from New York I mean no looks like every other every other word was like normal like California and it was just like ba ba ba ba ba wash yeah like I don't know about that oh and she also said ruff instead of roof she'd say like oh look at the rough oh I heard people do that huh Wow she must be from Mars yeah but there were other terrible things about the defy office the fact that it was in Beverly Hills for some random-ass reason there was no other production that is in Beverly Hills it's just medical offices and like agencies well not just one office either they had two offices on Wilshire like those are not cheap we like we like petitioned to move to a better area like every single year but hey it would be cheaper if we moved away from here mm-hmm and we'd be closer to everyone we wouldn't have to commute for like an hour through some BS traffic they really Drive there was awful you know we hired a real estate person and they just can't find anything they just can't find anything there's no there's like three houses in Los Angeles yeah who's your who's your real estate guy uh well she's right here Alexa I'm sorry I don't quite understand that ah see sorry buddy we're trying tried we tried you know next we're gonna get that Google one though yeah I think I think also a big thing was how massive Ian's beard got very large daddy'd up for Smosh you guys you don't understand in every way well you see I really have to take on the full role of Smosh dad it's been said a lot on the Twitter's that I am essentially like the stepdad of Smosh and I'm just trying to keep my family together yeah you're the you were the singer the single dad defy was the the rich stepmom that came in and kind of just took over yeah I have a name of a stepdad though cuz like stepdads always have a one-syllable name like Rob I like Turk you're like it you're like an ABC family single dad yeah sorry freeform you know what I think you should do I think you should grow out the beard a little bit more you should get it like straightened and sweep it so you have a upside-down bowl cut like a stranger things situation just like yeah it's the book nice yeah I I've come more into my beard yeah I haven't seen bare face you know or this is technically actually grizzly bear face but like naked face yeah well I mean the issue was like a lot of sketches you know you don't want to have every character you play be a bearded man yeah especially if you're trying to play like Kim Kardashian yeah doesn't work and stuff you know so without all the crazy videos we're shooting I was like well I'm just gonna work on my unemployment I'm an employment beer ya know parent company november/december didn't and then kind of went away in January then you Harry Oh see you shouldn't shaved it down februa Harry starch nope yeah it didn't have one for March March doesn't well that's it for the podcast forever no I never got to grow my beard out I don't think I ever will yeah well I play a teenager on on Goldberg's personally my beard what it was I didn't one day you'll get a majestic beard like mine thank you right now I just have peach fuzz but Shane it went a little crazy we did a little Jean cuffing it's been getting wild live in Jean so I started cutting my jeans let's get into it when you were sailing once you were single you really started yeah literally within a week of being single I was like you know what I think it's time to roll up these bad boys instead of dyeing your hair like every girl or getting bangs yeah but my my Jean cuffs are my bangs throw it up on the table over here just listening there is a leg on the table and there's a tough he's wearing high-top bands uh yeah so I rolled him up once and then I was like I like this and honestly it just keeps going up yeah at some point they're gonna hit my knees like some point your ball sacks just gonna be hanging up oh that's the goal also going back to a ball sack what do you call it when it when it hits the toilet well that's yeah that's the that's Kurt Maloney one of the our he wrote for us for a while he referred to it as laying anchor and and he was like yeah you ever lay anchor and I was like what he's like yeah it's when your ball sack dips into the water of the toilet bowl and I go dude that's that's a long way down that's like their date so far a long way down or your toilet is currently clogged yeah that's why the water is too high or your balls are too low and you know the ratio is off the bathrooms here are very nice oh my god in the bathroom at defy was all oh my god bathrooms can be awkward and boy were they dead silent but also far away like I've watched you like it's a silent film but even more it's I have you seen a quiet place that bathroom is quieter than that yeah but more terrifying well and okay well got to the point where you guys put a little weird yeah Rob put a radio in which was the greatest gift to mankind and I would I would always just switch to the Spanish stations yeah but I never could poop there I pooped there once and Noah was in the bathroom washing his hands and he kept laughing kept laughing at me now I will never ever poop in public again well speaking of pooping defy it the height of its business had maybe 200 300 people working out and the men's bathroom that everyone had to share had two toilets two toilets and two urinals yeah and they were always the urinal or the toilets were always in use there was always two people there dead silent on their phone didn't sound like they were pooping they were just in there for a solid hour just sitting err yep uh you know that's funny because uh the women's bathroom was like always empty I think that's cuz if I just hired a bunch of bros yeah DIF I had a lot where a lot of a lot of women there and what also sucked this was the worst part is the stall doors to the toilets had a massive space oh yeah those gaps they were had massive gaps and you've probably seen that at public bathrooms like oh there's too much space yeah for this bathroom door and so I would sometimes walk past on my way to get some paper towels see some accidental DOM and I would just see a fully grown man sitting there like he's in confession just staring forward and we'd make eye contact it sucks and I'm like oh man now like I can't look that guy in the in the eyes ever because I've made eye contact with him while he's dropping a deuce that's that you're most vulnerable like do you only the only eye contact the only pooping eye contact you should ever make is with a dog if you own a dog they're gonna look at you while they're pooping and that's a trust thing that's your best that's your best buddy but you should not do that with any human ever you know that's how you create the ultimate bond with your dog you both poop at the same time in looking yeah everybody knows that everybody listening knows that but you have to finish before the dog does yes or else he is the Alpha you always yes is so true so true your job you'd obviously just excuse like sorry bro you disappointed me oh my god there's dogs here there's dogs running around this office a dog-friendly office it's cute and waiting for a cat-friendly office I know good smell it's great for me because I unfortunately my I have my hand on we have our hand on Kourtney's shoulder from yeah listening we are consoling Cortney right now yeah and it's because it's so the dogs in the office is nice because I miss my dog he unfortunately is living in Utah with my mom because he really loves climbing he loves mountain coming he who already got his new rock-climbing shoes he Chuck's up his hands and he goes he liked the city life but he looked at you one day and he goes I'm afraid Courtney I must go to the mountains what is that voice Jorah Mormont but yeah basically he was like such an anxious dog and you guys saw for yourself what kind of what kind of anxiety he had when I leave and it was like uh not so he was anxious I'm an anxious person and know crazy and so like that was just stewing between him and I and like because I was working so much and when I got Jango at first like I very quickly realized it was kind of a mistake but I had people in my life that were like willing to help me yeah you're in a relationship you have a significant I'm like okay yeah they definitely like held my hand and guided me to this dog and we're like yes get this dog and like they were saying they were gonna help me a lot and like basically that first few months with that dog he was going all over the house like all over the house he was going to my boyfriend's place my place my dad's place my sister's place at work he didn't have any consistency and he was an anxious boy like he would try and chew through doors to get to me because he was like in such a panic and like that's her I just I my heart cannot take that it's a lot and yeah so with that inconsistency he just he never knew where he was gonna be the next day I was always worrying like okay what about tomorrow where's he gonna meet tomorrow and like I had a really crazy past with dogs when like we just had really bad luck with dogs getting sick and passing away so I was so fixated on giving this dog an amazing life and I just didn't feel like I was succeeding and that like I would drop a pencil in my apartment and he'd freak out and be like are you leaving me yet like are you leaving me now like he I felt terrible like I and I tried trust me guys I researched every possible way to help a dogs anxiety but he was like a rare case where like I talk to professionals like think people like Cesar Millan I was talking to and they were like honestly it doesn't like this is just one of those cases where it's there's no help like unless you're just always with them yeah and I mean it's a lot harder when you're living living by yourself yeah and you have a dog the same issues cuz I have a big old dumb German Shepherd and you know luckily I have a backyard run around and chase squirrels and chase that all those 16 outdoor cats and live next to my house yeah she says plenty entertained I think yeah she's got that like I still do feel guilt because I too was in a relationship when I got when I got that dog so it was like okay well she'll be at home with the dog and keep the dog entertained well I'm out doing you to be things but now I'm sort of faced with the similar thing where I'm like she could be in a better home yeah and if that if that opportunity presents itself then then I'd be willing to give her up but you had a good place to give Jenga yeah yeah my mom has a giant it's like a Doberman Rottweiler mix but they became best friends immediately they like run around the yard they're playing in the snow like he's he's having a great time I'm very happy with with where he's at now so like I couldn't even go to the gym and like the gym I'm a more docile person my cousin regularly and like not getting like to relax at the gym go there to sleep throw some some cowbells I don't know how nice that's how you get your anger out nice I mean it sounds like to me that you need to get a pet that doesn't give a [ __ ] about you which is why you should get a cat because they don't give okay no they actively hate you but it's kind of fun yeah I grew up with cats there they're really great and I do love them I just I right now I feel like I don't even feel right getting a pet right now because I like you I still hurt they'd hurt it's like I feel like I failed like oh dude and yeah III haven't got I want to pet so bad I love animals beyond imagination but I haven't ever had a pet since I've been living alone because I'm gone much that I'm like any pet I get I'm gonna feel awful for it that I'm not there for ya I'm gonna want to play with it all the time but I can't I mean I bought a few succulents recently and even still I get relaxed okay yo can we talk about how awesome air plants are for a moment yeah your air pants yeah dunk in the water once a month and then it's fine it's like once a week or something but yeah it's like they don't live in like soil or anything they're just this plant and you just dunk it in water for like ten minutes or something then you pull it out I think you're referring to something from Harry Potter this does not exist it's a baby the crying baby and they're so aesthetic too oh I see that's the thing too like I was like what am i even like a little hamster or like so you don't wanna I just don't want to risk me I can barely my cactus died recently guys I've had a lot of loss in the past 12 months no see no deer hill looking in that regard you should feel like a failure yeah we can't go but yeah like having a cactus die yeah you shame see the thing with a cat or a dog they will like they are actively like in your face so you're like oh yes I need to feed this thing like but I'm just I'm very scared I'm gonna mess up like I'm I'm definitely not ready to have a baby I'm gonna do something wrong considering like like come on look at where we are we're working wishing that people shouldn't have had us I wasn't a mistake seven kids in my family I was one that was planned not the only one but sure I mean it no you're the one that was like have you ever just like put either of your parents on the spot but like which one's your favorite no oh I think I asked as a kid but at this point I don't know but we did have the girls really alright dad who's a mistake you knew was plan to me like told us the story of each one it was great all right Holiday Inn can we talk about a Courtney's weird closeness to her to her family for a second so she sent a photo to us last night that was uh it was the side of her pants pulled down so is her ass cheek and I said you on it and I realized she was out with her with can I talk about yeah I'm just watching you're just ready to stab me yeah it's fine no I really so she sent this photo to us and I realize like she's not with her dad and her brothers for that photo to be taken it had to have either been your brother or your dad taking a photo of your ass mm-hmm I will say on my mom's side of the family people moon each other a lot yeah it's like a thing but I but I will say because because I think Ian's un eyes family for the most part because my dad's side of the family and and for the most part my family were not a very touchy-feely affectionate family we're very much like I am very proud of you perhaps I will hug you someday very much like there's nothing wrong with like with with mooning and there's nothing wrong with that mm-hmm kind of but I think the thing that I have a question about is like the setting up the photo like like because it was in like the back of a car so what happened was I was in the front seat um they just picked me up because that you'll understand why I had you written on my right ass cheek you will understand very soon try not to laugh yeah okay yeah I wanted to be a surprise well they're not gonna know true some people may yeah there's a try not to laugh with the valley folk and this ass-cheek Valley right here but yeah so I had basically I had written on my right butt cheek and his my brother's birthday we were going to a concert and I was in the front seat and I was okay Clark happy birthday and I got up and I showed him the cheek and you he was grossed out he's wearing out maybe it's just me who's overly comfortable with everyone else I but our family is very affectionate and close to each other but like yeah that was that and then I asked him to take the photo and he didn't he was he felt kind of weird about it but he was down oh it was just cheek he's just right she just you can't handle the left bro relax it's just cheek just just cheek for my bro just dude we we can't call anyone weird though when we do what we do yeah everything I do is normal I say I'm very thankful for well because it was it's seven kids in a family there would be like four siblings sharing a room at one time like we were forced to be closer with each other you know and I'm honestly I wouldn't trade it for the world except for I think it I am now like I'm very much an extrovert so like being around people it definitely is a comfort to me so when we had those months with defy being gone and waiting like and then I had Jango it was like I couldn't leave the house I could I felt like I would do as much as I could for him like taking into the park and whatever like I would get him is tired and content as possible he'd still be anxious whatever I was alone and then and like my family I would go to my family's house but they were like all off doing other stuff like didn't help that much so like coming to this office setting and being surrounded by people every day again has been like such a relief like so much and I actually even took a little bit of adjusting yeah I was like oh it's people I forgot how to human for a little bit just going around grabbing everybody yes I don't know if I'm an extrovert or an introvert I took a quiz and it was it was like it took an official quiz it's not like a BuzzFeed like you a potato or a cherry and then it's like it was what art what are you a potato a cherry that's more important oh we got to take the official potato or the cherry APA it wasn't a BuzzFeed quiz it was very legit it was a Facebook quiz yeah but I don't know I feel like even a quiz the Miz with a quiz I'd worry that I'd be I'd get in my head and I'd overthink questions and I wouldn't answer necessarily accurately it was nice though with a quiz it was like very much agree very much disagree and then a bunch of dots or you could be indifferent and like it was a lot of questions or like I didn't even know how I felt about it so I do in different spectrum though for sure yes my therapist sent it to me I think it's so weird people like brag about it I'm an introvert yeah it's become it's become like because I'm an introvert same with your zodiac there's a great book called quiet which is about introverts and extroverts whatever and it's it can be measured literally within months of being born yeah because it has to do with literally how you are processing stuff and they talk about how an introvert an introverts laying in a hammock reading a book is actually getting the same mental stimulation as an extrovert who's at a dance club with music blasting only one person's on Molly the guy reading the book he's loving but uh yeah and so like just because you like hanging out with people doesn't mean you're an extrovert necessarily and just because you like spending time alone doesn't make you an introvert so it's really interesting and it's not-it's not black and white yeah and being shy and being outgoing are different than being introverted an extrovert introverted is when you you recharge when you're alone experts are you recharge when you're with people yeah I don't know I actually think I might be an ambivert then that would that became a thing with their like well I have some traits that are introverted but then also extroverted so I guess I'm an ambivert and it's like everybody everybody just a human being yeah it's it's that's the thing I mean there's extreme cases for sure but for the most part everyone is somewhere in the spectrum I mean I would say I'd say Damian is someone I know who's who's very introverted and I mean he loves people but if he doesn't get that time by himself it you can see it messing with him I don't know for me I I feel like because I need both I need both daily I feel like if you have some people that say they're introverted like maybe you just have friends no cause like if you spend time around people that you don't really want to spend it is drain it it's like you gotta force enjoyment and you gotta like force the conversation like if you have if you have good friends and this obviously isn't just the only qualifier for a good friend but if you're comfortable and you don't feel like you have to force anything and you could just hang out it's like the it's like a thing in Pulp Fiction where she's like uma thurman's talking about the thing where it's like oh like we could sit here and not have a conversation and be okay yeah that's being comfortable with a person yeah I think for me I know a lot of times why I think I'm an introvert is maybe because I'm not necessarily a people pleaser as much as I when I'm around people that I don't necessarily feel super comfortable with I feel like I have to entertain like oh I'm afraid of them being bored so I got it yeah I got to keep the conversation going I got to make sure they're they're having a good time and that's exhausting so then I end up wanting to just get home and be by myself so I can relax yeah and not have to worry about warming for me it's like I'm extroverted I guess like for on the quiz it was like I'm 64% extrovert but like I tend to in a comment more for a 66% I would I would like 69 percent robotic dream hey you know we went like an hour and this is our first 69 jokes oh wow we just fist bump for those yeah we'll have to make sure every single podcast we do we'll have to time it out how long cuz I don't think we're ever gonna make it to an hour again I think it's 15 minutes probably so sorry you were rudely interrupted cord that's okay I was just saying like I'm an extrovert but I listen a lot and I like to sit and observe and listen like I'm I'm a I guess it's me absorbing the people around me but I'm not like like I definitely have that entertainer like yearning for the center of attention but once I actually get like the center of attention I'm like oh no no no no no like this I've seen that happen before by the way it it's it's I like I feel bad but it's also very funny well--that's could you be like guys guys and then as soon as that it was like yeah you're just like um okay so the same way too because everybody's that way doesn't yeah but especially like now because now I'm technically leading Smosh yeah Ernest and when like we have the group of everyone together and I'm like saying something and everybody's like turn to me listening listen everyone look at me we all look here's like fluid comes out of every quick say something business like synergy synergy is the business word ever since that uh Lonely Island yes so this was the litmus test for every meeting that I went into when we were trying to find a new home for Smosh if the sort of business leader that we were talking to said the word synergy within the first paragraph then I was just checked out it's like one of those buzz words that people use that don't really know what the hell they're talking about it's a great word but if you have to use it in like every sentence to try to sound like you're some sort of business expert it's like Shh hole disclosure I don't think I know exactly what it is it just mean like cohesiveness yeah okay yeah it's a fun word it's a good word but kind of like 60-69 I'm [ __ ] associate is I've seen YouTube channels who have [ __ ] number one Smosh [ __ ] oh my gosh can I bring something up it is semi Smosh related something happened on Valentine's Day - Anthony I saw so he did a video like with about like Jake Paul fans okay and Jake Paul got like mad on Twitter and like tweeted at him I there was an article about it can I topic but like no because youtubers that have [ __ ] like there was some [ __ ] happening on Twitter about is that the definition of [ __ ] no names anything we want this was Dex Dex are TOCOM oh that garbage way I've know I've never seen this website in my life but it was like Jake Paul Carr calls former Smosh youtuber Anthony Bhatia and in he did tweet what shake doesn't know those kinds of words apparently lawyer Jake what is this photo they have of Anthony Wow he's like it's it's like basically how they looked in the conversation we're not gonna be able to show that to anybody but it and he's like oh and Jake's like mmm controversial youtuber Jake Paul is beefing with former Smosh member Anthony Padilla due to his video discussing Paul's uses with his young fan base being their appearance but seriously like apparently Jake tried to DM Anthony about it because he was upset and since I guess Anthony like didn't get a chance to read I'm sure he's are nuts um and so Jake decided to make it public and tweeted at him being like like yo what's the problem What did he say said you're making videos with my fans to try and make them and me look bad I've never had a hater mentality so maybe I'm missing something but you should be upset with yourself oh no that's wild Anthony should box him actually he might you might have a chance I don't think I get these and it's got some reach but I don't Anthony's a lover by training Anthony's not a fighter I don't think I don't think Anthony I don't think neither Anthony nor myself have ever been in a real fight accidental fights I've never been I've never been punched in the face on purpose oh that's right Anthony punched me in the face I know yeah okay I don't know well cuz I got punched in the face because I must Ruthie he was practicing yeah Jake Paul tried to try to start beef with us once and I just ignored the tweet oh he was mad at we don't need it I don't even want it I don't even want a that's whatever it's whatever but yeah that sucks well that was very Valentines like yeah there's no love in that we were all we were all single on Valentine's Day I know dude oh yeah that this is actually my first time this might be my first time as an adult being single on on video whoa oh really holy crap so I've I've been single on many a v-day who's my first single v-day in like three years oh all right well less of a pound but I'll pound it GUP yeah you know I tried to find love on Valentine's Day I went and saw Aleta battle angel and I did not love that wait so my brother said it was really good he was like raving about it it's it's do you get used to the cool CGI it's got really cool fights you get used to the giant yes I was I was not bothered by that at all but look I will never hate on someone liking a movie because I like plenty of bad movies the dialogue is pretty garbage sometimes I think there's parts of sickness that's chappie literally hate no you see her within like the first two seconds and I turn to my friend Eevee battle and you see the battle angel and I turn to my friend I just go that's Aleta I don't get excited I see James Cameron's name attached to things like I do because I feel like there's always technical advances that are awesome yeah technically and he obviously knows how to create a blockbuster he made two of the largest movies ever literally yeah one of which now has four sequels planned and have you seen the time ten years you seen the titles for old wrinkly blue aliens in this next one four sequels you said yeah that they planned a billion I cannot believe that avatar that movie people commit suicide because of that movie because that world that was created was so beautiful to another was it called Pandora was that the name I saw that movie seven times I saw it once in theaters I was in second row far right it was 3d still I was John it was wearing a leather jacket get ready for Avatar the way of water avatar the seed Bearer avatar the token writer and Avatar The Last Airbender he's just like screw it I'm buying the franchise yeah and avatar the quest for any whoa yo these are straight-up sci-fi novels sitting like really bad I and look I'll say this too there's different aspects of movies that I enjoy right like and with this one like Aleta and same with avatar I'm like I'm not going to this movie for the insanely good dialogue or story structure I'm going because it's gonna be epic I enjoyed I enjoyed avatar when I first saw it but like there's not a fan base for Avatar you don't see people going to comic-con dressed up as their favorite their favorite avatar care they're not eight feet tall and blue Oh true but they don't even want to be cat captain Scarface man with the big night right captain Scarface man with the knife that's or or like tough pilot girl did you see the Halloween costumes for avatars Olivia had to wear one for every costume party ever yeah the only good bodysuit costume I've ever seen was the zero suit samus one that one was like a good material yeah and fit really well I even tried buying the Captain Marvel one by that same company but that one didn't fit as well I'd like the material was loose and weird well maybe in the next avatar they'll come out with a better bodysuit and then we can all be we can all live out our Navi fantasies they've had ten years to develop it so hopefully alright well that about does it for this first podcast time I swear will get better at this I had a honestly really enjoyed this this went a lot better than I thought it was gonna go I have to say good job guys we're fist pounding he's pounding listening we're doing it trill I got Captain Planet Captain Planet please subscribe to this podcast on you're listening to this on or if you're watching this on our YouTube channel I don't know do this YouTube channel called Smosh cast I'm guessing it probably is please subscribe to that as well we're gonna do this every single week we're gonna have a sort of rotating people through here we're gonna have some people that you that you've seen in Smosh videos we're gonna see we're gonna have some people possibly from behind the scenes but that are part of the Smosh family yeah and we're gonna bring in some of our some of our friends from the YouTube realm from time to time and bands Dwayne the rock Johnson Dwayne he'll run every other week and we're trying to I'm trying to get in contact with Aleta the battle angel to come on see oh this feels really good to be here okay I really I'm happy things are going so well I'm happy too I love you guys I love you guys all right and we love you we love you I love I love you you guys kind of love but I definitely love you guys yes oh come on I had to do it to him [Music]

Channel: SmoshCast

Views: 933,518

Rating: 4.9745607 out of 5

Keywords: smosh, smosh pit, smosh is homeless, the rumors are true..., #smoshishomeless, #smosh, ian hecox, podcast, youtube drama, courtney miller, shayne topp, jake paul, anthony padilla, alita battle angel review, matpat, defy scam, smosh games

Id: BypadfcDY3M

Length: 68min 24sec (4104 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 22 2019