How I Stopped Living For Others And Started Living For Myself ✨

i'll never forget what my philosophy  professor said to us on our first day of class   he said philosophy is about unlearning  everything you think you already know from that moment i began to slowly  unravel my views on the world   for the first time i started to question  what it means to live a good life   to be happy to live a life that  is truly meaningful and fulfilling we all ask ourselves these  questions in one form or another   but i never thought about what this looked  like for me and how it applied to my own life   for the first time i felt like i was figuring  out how to live life on my own terms to me   living life on our own terms means to form  our own unique perspective of the world   to let go of the narrative  that's been handed down to us   make room for new possibilities to know that we  hold the power to be the writer of our own stories   and allow our lives to become  the message we send to the world   i don't have it all figured out and i don't think  anyone does but there are some questions that   really reshaped my thoughts and my vision for  life and i wanted to share them with you today what truly motivates you for so many of us the  motivation behind our actions is money status   good grades other people's approval or praise well  i don't think that there's anything wrong with   that i've always wondered what do these external  factors mean to us and how fulfilling is it really   in the book the happiness equation the  author talks about the difference between   intrinsic motivation and extrinsic motivation  people who are extrinsically motivated will find   it difficult to continue to do something because  the tasks might not be in and of itself rewarding   but people who are intrinsically  motivated will be satisfied   not from reaching a specific  goal but from the work itself i have personally felt that the extrinsic  motivations in my life can only take me so far   with youtube with minimalism relationships fitness  goals or new hobbies so now anytime i decide to   take on a new project connect with someone or  pursue a new path i ask myself what is the true   motivation behind this and is what i'm getting  out of this truly worth my time and my efforts in my recent video i talked about how  society makes us feel like we're never enough   and i realized that i unknowingly carried this  mindset with me all throughout my life i felt   like i never had enough time on the weekends  never earned enough money never enough trips   never enough cute outfits and the list  goes on but then i realized that i   wouldn't even know if i had enough because  i never defined what enough means to me   from that moment i took note of how much i spent  each month how many pieces in my closet i actually   wore how many trips were memorable to me and how  much of my free time i wasted versus spent doing   the things i loved and no surprise it turned out  that i had more than enough when we determine what   is enough for us we can stop chasing what we lack  and begin to just appreciate everything we have   it's not giving up on our goals or  just settling but it's being content   and choosing gratitude so i hope you try  to pay attention to what you truly need   and what you don't what is enough for you  and what you can cut out from your life   and you might also find that you already  have everything you were looking for we all have our unique strengths my husband and i  were reminded of this when we worked on renovating   our house together he is very measured and  calculated and i'm an ideas girl and tend   to look at the bigger picture instead of focusing  on our differences we eventually learn to use our   natural skills and talents to work as a team and  realize that what each of us brought to the table   were equally important the point is we're all so  special and focusing on our strengths is a way to   shine light onto what makes us truly unique this  way we won't feel like we're constantly falling   short or worry about not measuring up to others so  take a moment to ask yourself without any effort   what are you naturally drawn to what excites you  what makes you feel alive confident and fulfilled while i understand that many circumstances are  far beyond my control i also know that i can make   empowering choices along the way to shape the  direction towards the life that i want to live   i think this is why it's so important to take  some time to envision and plan out our lives   even if it changes with time the plan isn't  to calculate every little step of the way   but it's a chance to map out our priorities  and set specific milestones for ourselves   which can give us a bigger purpose and it can  guide the decisions that we make in our day to day   this way we're no longer letting life happen  to us but we're letting life happen for us this can be done in so many different ways it  can be as simple as writing a personal mission   and vision statement in our journal or creating  a vision board to actually piece together your   dream life every once in a while i like to  write down all the different areas of my life   my health relationships career passions  spirituality visualize how all the different   dimensions can come together to shape my  success happiness and true fulfillment for most of my life i felt like i had  to act as myself instead of just being   myself saying all the right things wearing  what's appropriate smiling at the right times   going through life from one  predictable milestone to the next i remember feeling quite empty inside  because i was just mimicking what society   and everyone else expected of me instead of  taking the time to figure out who i really was   the thing is no matter how much i want to  point the finger at others i realize now   that the only person who was actually holding me  back from living the life that i wanted was me i know that saying phrases  like don't hold yourself back   is much easier said than done because most of  us have close families and friends and people   in our lives that direct us down the path  they believe is the best for us but there   comes a point when we have to draw a distinct  line between respecting the opinion of others   who love us and trusting our own  voice that is telling us otherwise now i try to listen to that inner voice   because i feel that it's the only way  to live a life that feels true to me   it has led me down some wild and unknown paths  but that's okay because i was happy to know that   it was a path that i chose so whatever you're  contemplating on i hope you don't allow others   to hold you back but most importantly i hope that  you don't hold yourself back remember there is no   right answer in life so let's experiment do the  things we want and learn the lessons as they come i truly believe that we all have the power to  start writing our own stories the way we see fit   so i hope you take advantage of what's been  handed to you to create a beautiful story   that is uniquely yours thank you guys so much for  watching and i'll talk to you very soon take care

Channel: Malama Life

Views: 602,028

Keywords: Why I Stopped Living My Life for Others, Living life on my own terms, Living the life you want, Living my best life, Living a good life, How to stop caring what people think, How to stop caring what others think, How to stop comparing, Main character, How to be the main character, Self love, Self love practices, Self love habits, Self love routine, Self care, Self care habits, Self care routine, Self improvement, Loving yourself, How to love yourself, Malama life

Id: xceTcVykI40

Length: 9min 16sec (556 seconds)

Published: Thu Mar 03 2022