How Did You Outsmart Your Parents? (r/AskReddit)

what waves did you outsmart your parents as a kid you know how if you hit at your friend's house your parents didn't have to take you home that worked once I cracked the code on my computer timer by putting a layer of powder lubricant what you'd use for Pinewood derbies on the keypad I asked for more time online one weekend and then examined which keys were pressed then I just tried the farad combinations until I cracked it I hit save password once when my parents were signing me into the net I then spent the next hour also removing one asterisk at a time and figuring out which was each letter blocked my school's number so my parents couldn't be notified when I didn't show up for class genius I told really obvious lies so my mother thought I was a terrible liar I did that too only I took it one step further I hadn't realized that most people has a tell when they lie so I invented one that I use when I lie to my parents when I wanted something I would ask for something much bigger first when they refused I would ask for the thing I originally wanted and my parents would compromise and agree I found out later that this is an actual psychological trick people use door in the face I would stay up past my bedtime and read under the covers with a flashlight dang was I our baddest I did this to the fear of hearing one of my parents walked down the hallway and poor's outside my bedroom door was so exhilarating at first I just wanted to stop at a rest stop to get some skittles and my parents said we weren't going to stop driving for that but then I really had to pee and they didn't believe me so I pee myself subsequently pulled over at the next rest stop I was relieved and I got my skittles jokes on them this is hardcore my parents set up the TV so that I had to enter a code to watch the restricted channels I couldn't figure out their code and I knew that if I started at zero zero zero zero inches and working my way up to 9999 it would all be for naught if they simply changed to code once in a while so I figured out that there was a timer the television for instance could set the TV to turn onto Good Morning America at 7:00 a.m. or you could set the TV to 10:00 on the Cinemax at 1:00 a.m. if you did it that way you didn't have to enter the code so I would get up late at night after the parents went to bed and I would set the timer for Cinemax skinemax one minute ahead of the current time and boiler boobies flawless plan unless your parents happen to be sitting in the living room one night at 1:00 a.m. having a serious conversation about your behavior and you've forgot to turn the TV off my stet came up to me the next morning and said guess what happened last night game over I also tried to guess the passcode there were 9999 combinations so I knew I was in for a challenge why sat down and got it first try with the code 1111 I was grounded for what I didn't remember when I was around 7-8 they took my TV privileges away I turned it back on they unplugged it I plugged it back in then I notice about 10 minutes later the picture is gone I try all different channels but nothing was working I thought about it for a while and remembered where the cable was my parents had actually unscrewed the cable I went into the basement turned a laundry hamper upside down stood on it andr hooked the cable but dad was proud he left it on my parents did this with the Wi-Fi they did not think I'd figure it out it was two minutes of detective work in the dark addicts and BAM internet back on found out Santa wasn't real when I inquired as to the purpose of there being barcodes on the presents in the AOL days my mother would put a time block on the computer so I could only spend one hour a day online all I had to do is run a connectivity test and select a checkbox that would allow you to remain online for maintenance eventually I told her about that one when I found your book safe a little hollowed-out book to hide things in with a list of passwords my parents used in the skid log on whenever I wanted of course if it was dial-up so it could take hours just to get online we were also paying for it in ours like phone minutes those were strange times I'm a first generation kid my parents came as refugees from Cambodia I taught them English my family moved to China for a year for my dad's work we're not Chinese being a kid I picked up the language pretty quickly and became their 5yo interpreter instead of brushing my teeth I used to eat candy cane so my parents would think that I did I really regret doing that now and now you moderate a subreddit obsessed with soda tough break this was back when I was probably 7-8 years old growing up I would play Pokemon on my old school Gameboy til 1-2 in the morning every night my bedtime was around 830 usually my parents would come say goodnight around 9 o'clock then it was go time I would grab my flashlight gamma boys back then didn't have a light inside the screen and start playing under the blankets I was scared that I would course so I always had a book under there with me just in case did that all the time as a kid only without the Gameboy just a book I screamed bloody murder when I got spanked with the wooden spoon because the wooden spoon didn't really hurt compared to the belt over hand your mother was not doing it right at all I could show your mom a thing or two about spankings when I was 12 my dad would come back from work late at night and I was instructed to go to bed at 9:00 p.m. the latest I would stay up all night playing video games he cost me a couple of times and I realized how he did it is he felt that my blanket was still cold what I started doing was leaving the blanket on my thermostat so when I heard the elevator turn on I would jump in bed he came in my room for a kiss felt the covers and kiss me goodnight I did the same but then my mom got smart and started feeling the temperature of the computer caught me every time after that D when I was 15 I told my parents I was going to scout camp when really I went hitchhiking down the west coast with two friends I coordinated the trip to match up with my true back parking schedule and was dropped off packed for hiking at our designated meetup spot I checked in every couple of days to tell my mom how camp was going while me and my buddies hitched rides to the redwoods dangerous but clever I had to take a daily vitamin that tasted like but over the course of god knows how long I would stick it in one of my mom's potted plants by her front door and cover them up with dirt I did this every morning it wasn't until my mom finally repotted the plant did she find hundreds of vitamins encased inside whenever I didn't feel like going to elementary middle school I would pretend I had a fever I would rub my hands and blankets on the thermometer to make heat in the friction and make the temperature a solid 101 degrees brought the thermometer to my dad and got to stay home from school worked every time I found out that if you took our Renea thermometer and held it slightly outside your ear it would sometimes read above 100 just try that a couple times and mom would let me stay home she never caught on and never made me we try it when my mom was young she would collect change and go ask her dad if she could exchange it for bills he agreed and put the change into a big jar in his bedroom a couple weeks later she would take change from his jar and ask for bills again and repeated the process for a couple months before he realized I did this same thing but the change went into a bowl with the keys act I'd asked for the change in the bowl a few hours later asked for bills instead she'd say put the change in the bowl I did this for yours she only found out when I told her we had an actual cookie jar and at night I would take a few and fill the bottom of the jar with other crappy treats I never ate when I was in HS my parents put a master lock between the two handles of our boost cabinet thinking they'd won I just took the doors off this one is by far the funniest by far one of my best friends comes from a family composed of deaf mother and father and four pretty sisters who are not deaf my friend now well out of college tailed her dad at when she was in high school she used to sneak out of the house or sneak her boyfriend into her room at night he responded by telling her about his network of feathers that he had placed on all of the doors in the house he claimed to know whenever someone was coming into the house it's night and to know when his daughters were sneaking out based on which feathers had fallen off off doors and then he sat there smugly while his daughter got flicked one room over high school I was ditching school one day with my friends hanging out at my house while my parents were at work someone knocked over the large empty glass vars on top of the entertainment center instead of cleaning it up and lying later when they asked my siblings and I where it went I told everyone not to touch anything and to get out of the house when I came home later that afternoon my parents were discussing if they should get rid of my sister's cat because it knocked the VARs off the entertainment center my mom saw my friends and by playing Goldeneye and thought it was too violent for us eight-year-olds so she took my copy away I enabled paintball mode fired my gamma shock and told my mom that it was really a paintball game and I turned the blood off and she gave it back to me people were friggin not even the early days of household technology this this is why our generation blew everyone else away when it came to computers the first time my parents tried to take away the internet for me came when I was 7 I had been given an old hand-me-down compact laptop as a Christmas gift from my grandfather and since I grew up around computers this was an amazing gift since it ran Windows 98 though it was a big security risk for our network on that basis I was told that I couldn't have internet privileges on it and would have to use the family computer and this I soon discovered would not fly this in mind I formed a plan I waited until my father was working late one night after helping my siblings find some toys even three and five y oskins nitch and waiting for my mom to start working on some schoolwork I snuck into the computer room and set into action the laptop had no wireless so I was stuck connecting with a long Ethernet cable borrowed from an older town after quietly fumbling around with the router and my computer for a bit I started ie and found that it had worked my master plan could no longer be stopped for about three hours my dad ended up coming home earlier than usual and caught me in the act probably on Brummel Nick jr. or something he yelled at me for about 30 minutes and promptly took the laptop away for a month years later he told me that the yelling was an act and that watching his son figure out how to circumvent the rules was one of the proudest moments of him being a father using the parental controls to lock out the channels they watch when I got pee at them sometimes I wonder if parental controls were designed to control parents I was typically a good kid but occasionally would boat heads with my mom during one argument when I was maybe 10 - 11 I must have mouthed off and she called me a son of a B ha ha ha what's so funny ha ha ha you are correct Oh for Christ's sake just go to your room jazz hands my family's always made a joke of taking the easy response to some things like that's what she said or like your face and whatnot I was talking to my brother about an ex-girlfriend one time and called her a W from the other room my mom calls out your mom's aww followed by slightly quieter wait crap I was a skinny boy when I was young but I would just love all kind of sweets and whenever my parents bought any mind six people in the family so it wasn't just a bit of sweets I always found out where she was hiding them and ate it all the time joke's on her though I am now fat I'm pretty sure the joke is on you kinda lame 'but i was and ha purfles still am ridiculously good at sneaking food ice cream candy cookies you name it if i wasn't supposed to have it i knew exactly how much to eat so it wouldn't look like anybody had taken any of it it's funny though i'm at college now and my mom said something about how when she buys ice cream now it lasts at least twice as long ha ha yet this means she knows what was happening ha ha I went to Paris with my boyfriend for a few days without my parents knowing that was probably my greatest teenage sneaking accomplishment how the heck did you pull that off unless you live slightly outside of Paris every time my parents said no to something I would ask them to state their reasons why not it would usually amount to because of them I would just stand there staring as them until they were embarrassed and at least I was a logical sucker they used to password protect the PC so that it could only be used whilst a parent was home I guess the password a couple of hours after they set it up it would have lasted more than a few months if one of my siblings didn't tell on me in the days of XP I would reboot into safe mode create my own temporary admin account use it then remove it before anyone got home I hid my P in plain sight I'm a late 80s to mid 90s kid and I was a rabid collector of comic books had them everywhere in my room on my desk in overflowing long boxes stacks on the floor crap was crazy anyways at the time the savage sawed off Conan was still in print a relic of when Marvel experimented with the magazine format in the 70s along with Conan Saga which was just for a prince of old savage stories so whenever I got my hands on a hustler for example I'd take a magazine sized Conan comic undo the staples throw out all the pages then I'd take apart the porno the same way but chucked a lot of the pages with just words and reassembled the now streamlined skin mag with a Conan cover left them lying around with the other comics mum would come and clean my room off him 10 years after I left home I finally told her her might she claims she never noticed them she was the not in my house type when it came to that stuff so I believe her when I was really young I lived out in the country and my mom would drive me to school every day there was a bus that took the kids that lived in town home and for some reason I always wanted to ride the bus to the point where every now and then my mom would give me bus fare and picked me up in town them drive me home in grade four we moved into town so I started riding the bus home every day and it soon lost its mystique because let's be honest riding the bus isn't anything special bit of back story my mom isn't a super healthy eating and as a result I was pretty much never allowed to eat any kind of sugar whatsoever what I soon discovered though was that my mom still thought I was fascinated with riding the bus and I came up with a plan a couple of times a week I would tell my mom that I was just gonna go ride the bus around for a while I would take a book or something to do so it looked legit I'm sure she was just happy to have one of the kids out of the house so she never questioned it in reality I would take the bus down to the mall and buy as much candy as I could eat she never caught on and when I told her about it last Thanksgiving ten years after the fact she was devastated because it was one of her favorite weird cute kid things story to tell people I slept in the basement but somehow they'd catch me reading at night then I found out they could see the light through the cracks in the floor so I figured out how to slide my book partly under the water heater and read by the light of the pilot flame ha H a you would have been the first to die from carbon monoxide poisoning maybe you didn't know it at the time but you were there canary mix oatmeal and milk throw in toilet clave vomiting stay home from school for a week to play new Nintendo I used to keep my face buried in books as a kid I would usually do all the fun stuff during the day like playing outside and stuff but nighttime was reading time after the age of 10 and I got to where I would read all night until daylight while school was out during summer on course my mother once saw the light under my door and yelled at me to get my bus in the bed so I kept at behind my door when I went on my reading time I would put the towel under my door preventing the light from showing many a book was read from that time on I once snuck a drum kit into the house while my parents were on holiday I loaned it from a friend who was looking to sell and I gave it back the day before my parents came back and they were pretty confused when the neighbors complained about the noise by booby-trapped my room in order to catch Santa Claus using the electronics kit I got the year before a boy was dad freaked out when the Buzzle went off when Santa tried to drop off my stocking while I was asleep soo ho busted I was I dunno 10 I managed to sneak a tin of frosting out a store without my mom noticing I didn't steal I tricked her into paying for it they said I couldn't watch TV so I just would sit in the room and watch the reflection of the TV in the pictures we had in the room how I did this too but I would pretend to read and told my mom I was sitting in the living room because I didn't want to be alone my mother wanted me deeply to get confirmed as a Catholic I was a top ccd like Sunday school student but I did not believe in God or the events of the Bible I argued my way out of continuing the path to confirmation in seventh grade by rationally explaining that a confirmation confirms your belief so if you don't believe you shouldn't be confirmed because then I'm supposedly lying to God and that I can always go back and get confirmed if that faith comes back into my life they couldn't figure out a way to get me to do it so they acquiesced when I was grounded I shat on their bed I'm not sure this classifies as outsmarting your parents I wasn't allowed to read Harry Potter when it first came out because I was pretty young and my parents didn't think I could differentiate between fantasy and reality and thought that if I read them I would join a coven I'm serious anyway the books were in my school library and all my friends were reading them so I checked them out and would only read them at school I would leave them in my desk and not take them home so my parents had no idea I read them on the playground and got in trouble for reading during class my teacher was the coolest teacher ever and had no idea I wasn't allowed to be reading these so when I finished the ones in the library as could then had just come out I think and the library didn't have it she brought me her personal copy to read all was well until parent-teacher conferences when said awesome teacher told my parents how proud she was of my reading ability in that I had read chamber of secrets in a day I got a talking to it at that point they realized that they were being ridiculous since I had not yet started dabbling in the dark arts and I was three books in and I got a pass to read all of the rest when I was a toddler I would rip my diaper off and escape my room I still ripped it off when they duct-taped it on I bet they thought that was a crappy situation you have been visited by the holey dog air like and subscribing magnificent person [Music]

Channel: UE Stories

Views: 257,829

Keywords: parents, parents stories, outsmart, outsmarting, smart kids, smart, smartest, parenting, parent, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh

Id: suwrTJgZvTw

Length: 20min 20sec (1220 seconds)

Published: Tue Apr 07 2020