Horus the Chud | a Warhammer 40k story

father your son has returned I bring the destruction of Olympus I mean the Imperium oh Horus my favorite son what heartache you have caused me I only ask why why Horus why destroy everything we built was it because erder made you wear a little propeller cap that one time I told her it was a bad idea you truly wish to know father I I mean no sure sure guess the Imperium went woke father it it went what the ruinous Powers have given me a terrifying vision of the future one that sped me on to rebel I saw horrible things father Dreadful things women serving in combat roles oh we have those already I'm I'm pretty sure ethnic minorities front and center of the advertising V and jagy right there I mean what next calling it The Imperium of hecken whome non-binary folks well uh no not not really I don't know what any of that means really I'm here to put a stop to it father this is a white man's Galaxy um Horus this is getting a little uh nutty I I kind of preferred it when you were raving about the chaos gods or or whatever oh thank goodness I thought we were about to get demonetized bgy it's me J freaking grammaticus oh boy you got to come with me biggie we got to open a portal to the chud Dimension I would rather Horus killed me right here and now then go anywhere with you John grammaticus but you good no [Music] fine you see biggie here in the CH Dimension every living being's personality is governed by a three-point dial that goes from chud to Normie to woke you know most folks are normies like hor but some rap scallion must have come through here and messed with his Dial H I wonder who it could have been Mech we're in the flipping chud Dimension let's mess with a bunch of these dos what do they do who cares we'll just switch horse back from CH to Normie and everything will be hunky Dy wait do you think if we switch him to woke he'll not rebel against me well I don't know I'm not some kind of freaking Science Guy I'm John grammaticus yeah I I I know uh well it's with a shot good luck Biggie and remember if you ever get in trouble just call on me J gicus I would really rather not but uh thanks I [Music] guess oh Horus my favorite son why you're a child father the Galaxy was a peaceful place before your imper cist fascist karal dictatorship came along moris you're the one who led my armies so there's no ethical consumption under the Imperium father what was I supposed to do not genocide xenos you want me to starve you want me to starve don't you John W the hips I don't think woke Horus is going to work out then we got to go back to the CH Dimension you know the idea that all of our thoughts and feelings are governed by a three-point dial it makes you feel kind of cosmically insignificant doesn't it hey man I don't know nothing about Cosmic significance I'm just J freaking grammaticus indeed uh hey what do you think would happen if I just smashed horus's dial I don't know biggy that might have some crazy consequences uh you know I'm just tired of dealing with this by this point yeah just just like the audience is tired of dealing with my subplot well here goes nothing looks like we messed with a freaking natural order biggy I can feel myself be rip kind out of existence looks like this is the end for freaking prus we're in Mar mcf 1993 Warhammer World diama father well h could be worse say Horus have you ever heard of a guy named John grammaticus no

Channel: DreadAnon

Views: 115,750

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Id: 5NvxDcdgDHI

Length: 4min 40sec (280 seconds)

Published: Mon Feb 26 2024