Now, he may say he's not ready because, one, he just doesn't want a
relationship with you. And I know that might be hard for you to hear and a hard pill for
you to swallow. But I don't want
to give you no BS. I don't want to sit trying to give you this nice answer that makes you
feel okay because that doesn't really help
you in this situation. (Music) Hey what's up everybody, this is Stephan Labossiere aka Stephan Speaks. Now, I just want to be
real with you right now. You know when I sit down to do these videos, I sometimes overthink and over analyze and wonder how I need to convey these messages to you. But you know, my
favorite thing to do I know what my best
practice is, is to pray before I speak
on these videos and just let my
spirit lead me. And so, with today's video, I want to address this issue that I'm constantly getting questioned
about by women. Whether I do my lives
on social media, them emailing me, and it's always about well, he's not ready
for a relationship what should I do? How should I handle
this situation? All right. So, let me make it
real clear up front. When he says he is not ready for a relationship, stop dealing with him. That's the first plain
and simple answer. But let me further
explain this because again, so many women get caught up in
these situations going about it the wrong way and only causing more
problems for themselves. Listen, here's the reality, when a man tells you he is not ready for
a relationship number one, do
not get confused by the fact that he
may behave in a way that makes you feel like he has feelings for you. Because that can
be very confusing and you can start to
latch onto his actions even though his words
are telling you something completely
different. Now, I know we always say actions speak
louder than words, but in situations like these the actions and the words have to be consistent
with each other. If they're not, there's
a huge problem. And so, when any
man can say to you he is not ready for
a relationship, that is the default answer. I don't care what
he does for you. I don't care how
he treats you. If he says he is
not ready for one, do not make yourself
believe otherwise because you're setting
yourself up for failure. Now, he may say
he's not ready because one, he just doesn't want a
relationship with you. And I know that might
be hard for you to hear and a hard pill for
you to swallow. But I don't want
to give you no BS. I don't want to sit trying to give you this nice answer
that makes you feel okay because that doesn't really
help you in this situation. The reality is that he does not see you
as the one for him. And you know what? That's perfectly fine because he's not
the one for you. And I'm glad at least somebody's recognizing
that in this situation. Don't internalize that, don't take it personally
in the sense that there's something
wrong with you. Listen, it doesn't
matter how amazing and great of a woman you are. Everyone is not
going to like you. Everyone is not
going to see you as their potential wife or someone they
want to invest their time and energy into. And that's fine because you're not going to
view every good man as someone you want
to invest into and spend your life with. It's just the way life is, we don't connect
with everybody, we're not going to want to take it there with everybody. So be it. The quicker we can
recognize that, the quicker we can move on and be ready and
willing to receive someone who is truly for us. So, again, he just may
not see you as the one, but rather than
tell you that, he'll just say I'm not
ready for a relationship because he may want to enjoy you in the moment. He may want to continue to hang out with you and gain whatever
benefits you provide without him having
to commit to you and you obligate him to being officially in a
relationship with you. But regardless, you've got
to take him at his word. He says he's not ready
for a relationship, leave it at that. But now, there's a
other side to this. He may say he's not ready
for a relationship because guess what? He's
actually not ready. He may recognize
within himself that there are issues
he needs to address or there's some foundations that he needs to set. Again, it may have nothing to do with you as a woman. A matter of fact, it may be out of
respect for you because he views you
in high regard. He does believe you
deserved the best and he recognizes he is not prepared or willing or able to give
that right now. And if that is the case, you still have to
leave his ass alone. It doesn't change anything because guess what? If he is not ready to
give you what you need, then you don't need to be
giving him what he wants. That's only going to shoot
yourself in the foot. You've taken away
any incentive for him to get his
act together, for him to be able
to come back later and you guys can
come together and be in a relationship. So, regardless of whether he doesn't see you as the one or he's truly not ready the answer remains the same. You have to let him go. Now, a lot of women attempt to play
the middle ground and still remain friends and
they'll say to themselves well, I'm not going
to have sex with him. I'm not going to get
too involved with him. But you got to stop
lying to yourself because many times you fall right into that trap. You end up doing
girlfriend stuff, you end up sleeping with him, and even if you
don't, you become so emotionally invested and consumed by
this situation that it completely
takes your eye off of where you should be focusing. You, your relationship
with God, your purpose, your growth, you cannot let this man be a distraction
in your life. If he is not ready to be what he needs
to be for you or to fully commit to you then let him go. When he's ready,
he can come back you guys can discuss it and if things are
what they need to be, then you can have
a relationship with this individual. But do not get caught up trying to play the
middle ground, because you're only
going to play yourself. So, ultimately listen, there are going to
be some situations where the man is just lying. There are going to
be some situations where the man is
being honest. Either way, you don't need to get romantically
involved with him. You need to be
honest with yourself that you cannot
handle trying to be just his friend
in the meantime. And if there's truly
a connection there, there will be an
opportunity later on. But you don't need
to be sitting around waiting for that opportunity. You need to shift your
focus back on you. You need to make
sure you're doing what God wants you
to do in your life. And when you do, you'll receive everything
that is truly for you. Don't get caught up
in these situations. Do what needs to be done, focus on your growth, and you're going to see the blessings come your way. (Music) (Music) (Music)
