Graham Norton Show 2007-S1xE13 Miriam Margolyes, Rupert Everett and The Zimmers-part 1

welcome to the show oh it's been exciting as did so many award ceremonies this week now that did you all watch the BAFTAs these yourselves see there was some controversy at the awards I know if you watch because not all the really big shows one especially that one with that you know the one with the bloke in a coma if she's living in 1973 what's up all their Strictly Come Dancing didn't win we are we head off to the after-show party offers at the Natural History Museum oh nothing says woo like having a party in a museum lots of people there X Factor winner Shayne Ward and he spoke to me can I take a coat yes laughter I quite a bit to drink yeah no seriously I spent 15 minutes talking to a prehistoric skeleton that he was Joan Rivers thought she was quiet my favorite my favorite award ceremony this week was the greatest Britons 2007 did he would see that what the hell was going on there it was an ITV oh it's classy you know a who sponsored a little oh my god David Beckham David Beckham won the award for Best global achievement yes oh this year global achievement next year the world Dame Helen Mirren she won the film award when she picked up the trophy she told the audience and these are the exact words it's great to be up there with fish and chips bangers and mash and a good old cup of tea but what category was seeing best value meal what's in the big award of the evening the Queen was voted the greatest living Briton just in time that day will come day off one one newspaper said that the greatest greatest living written awards the Queen beat officer Paul McCartney so wish I'd watched it now here is the actual award she won that that do you really think the queen wants a tacky piece of plastic she owns Canada she's not the crown jewels you know you're on your left is the queen or diamond the largest cut diamond ever produced and next that on a velvet cushion is a bit of perspex it that you got off Kate Thornton Sharlee himself I'm so glad my feet touch the ground they usually do I'm trouble water there now Rupert at the moment you were slight royal connection how I do actually yes I've been working on a film a remake of the old st. Trinian's films in which Alastair sim played a headmistress of a very bad girl school probably no one knows those films anymore and I'm doing the same role and I was thinking about who would be my role model and then I turned on the television and there was Camilla the Duchess what she called cut core ball actor having a drink doing the girl and smoking doing all those things wearing rubber gloves I thought she's my girl she's fantastic it's good he's a picture of you the Knights would count me far away now Camilla no I haven't but I do love her well I have and she's lovely she looks like everyone she's a cracker she looks like she's a real laugh she is a laugh she's a dear lady honestly and I get quite pissed off when people are nasty at all so I didn't ever said worse watch out man she really is a love you love her and she would come to the film and enjoy it well I hope she will we're hoping to have a royal premiere that would be fantastic right we probably should edit this out then and it's happening you're be you were invited but the last time we met each other we went to see the queen of country would see love to Dolly Parton yes we did we have we got two nice her sort of a sort of meeting meet-and-greet we had to queue for about how well 45 minutes long in a tunnel you know and I've been dying to go to the lavatory for ages so I farted and no no well Miriam understates legit but I was irritated we're standing in the queue and it's like nice people here will COO with the dolly pitcher she's letting us balls for fart and it was the loudest roar well I fart a lot I think I'm it's like but I don't know why but I think it brings people together I think it's an encouraging human thing to do we all do it yeah we all do it you know someone cuz you're isn't it what's the thing you're having done is that at the coal : I've had it I've had it actually this is um it's a sort of party political broadcast as on behalf of of colonoscopies because it's a wonderful way of checking what you've been eating and and the harm it does to you as you check it as it goes it well what happens is you lie on your side and the doctor puts a lot of tubing up into your and then it all sort of comes out and he looks at it all the way up and you know and it's really worth having done so please please do it have you done it no but you meant to a guys meant to do it by thirty five forty apparently I don't know why guys should be different are here's some travelling news and what it is is you're both you both jet set don't you go on plane yeah you travel all around the world so this might interest you according to a new report this week taking Viagra could help travelers overcome jet lag now I know it's on a great image a Plane full of businessmen all dose of Viagra is the red-eye flight whatever you do don't hit my Agra before getting on the plane it's very hard to get in plane it looks like you've got a gun in your pocket no no honest it's an erect penis look I still can't get on the plane and you don't want an erection for the whole flight cuz you can't put your little tray down for the meal word the stewardesses must be liking the invite announcements though erections can be found here remember the nearest direction may be behind you oh dear planeload of overexcited what would that look like Oh school because I think there may be a theme to this evenings check because you you've entertained people on planes you were doing a film was it in Morocco you doing film and you were travelling back yes it was poor little rich girl and it was a difficult shoot and everybody was a bit depressed and tired you know which you couldn't get on on films and I thought if I exposed my breasts it would cheer people up in those days they were they were curvy they were they had some life in them Salvation Army now raising the fallen and I didn't mean to be offensive at all I meant to be you know caring and loving and I just took off my bra and streak down the middle of the plain clothes cast right through the toilet to economy it was wonderful this one but did you get a round of applause actually no that were just shocked fate but I will do anything to cheer people up that's very nice view so let's see ah where do you live now Rupert do you live here with Univ in America or I live here in London all the time most of the time yeah but you said much time in LA do you work out of LA for a while and you know I lived in New York and I still do a little bit and in in Florida as well but I prefer living here actually it's nicer well now at joy Britain's in America err posh spice offices she's moving is his tragedy we still call a posh spice rather than her name but she said she's been seen out about with a certain problem now am it's obviously little colder in LA than we thought I guess a problem was wearing a one leg of tights as a top she's no fool because she then bought these right and I've got some these are called petal tops right and what you do is you get these and do that you see and you put them on the thing it's like you know for a non-slip in the bar seriously you do don't you have a picture of it with them on dearly are see it's like bum Jo joggers nipple is it wouldn't it would stop that joggers nipple no stop it being seen right but I must say I think the nipple was less obvious than the great big thing maybe they're leaking is she pregnant what you might be no but she's had a bunch babies doesn't she do you want some leaky lady you go you don't have to put them on now but they're there for later boys good so you didn't drench the back of his head love it she just had a baby she claims let's see how old's your baby she's three months three months ah who's there after the baby tonight my mother your mother Amaya oh how cheap talking talking in the background talking reckons hey did you see where David Beckham is at building up a collection of avant-garde Modern Art yes he hopes to amass a valuable private collection it really is a race isn't it who's going to get back his money first art dealers or the Church of Scientology David David loves art and according to one paper he recently gave Victoria a painting he bought for 250,000 pounds there's some life like I say now one can use paper asked David if you like Raphael and Donatello and Beckham provide I do like all the Ninja Turtles Beckham's are the only footballer to be good at art at Wayne Rooney is also a gifted painter you were interested in art as we were teenager when you you worked as a life model when I was at school I earned some money as a nude model and I wrote to Augustus John who was a very great painter that I saw on television being interviewed and I offered myself as a model to him and for some reason my parents allowed me to do it I don't know I don't know why so they send you packing off to a gossage John's house by yourself no they took me there and drop your door in fording bridge and emption mmm so I just I just had a pair of knickers and a top and you know my school uniform I think or something like very sneaky I don't know because they were very respectable believe me and I August's John then was about 80 87 or 88 I think and it's not often that an 88 year old will see a nude girl of 17 if you know in his own home and he said coming coming coming he's a quick big fellow in a boiler suit and and did rot he'll take off her clothes and so I did quite quickly and decorously and and then but this was a bit that was a bit unexpected he looked so smoothing his beer very nice fella um and then he said climb that ladder I didn't know when it climb ladders clothes do I sort of got her went up the ladder and we're not what you could do off of the ladder sort of one one foot on one rung and the other foot on the other ones I was a bit spread out you know and and he drew me and and then I came down the ladder sixteen oh when I went to I was sitting an exchange course to Paris when I was sixteen and my family were very worried about me they thought I was living a life that was too loose and they sent me to a very respectable family in Paris and just on the body balloon and the first afternoon I got there the madam of the family said everybody would maybe like to take a walk now in the Bois for the afternoon that's Nikki and I were talking to the Bois and I'd been living a very bad life in London before my mother was adamant that I was you know going to pull myself together and get everything right but nobody knew the body bellowing which is the big main Park in Paris is is the sex Center at from 96 drugs everything everything you want bad can happen there that's all the bad policemen all the Brazilian she man all the hookers or the everything so I was walking through the Buddy blood did you do this and I came across this van and it was like juggling up and down and inside there was ding ding ding ding the fascinating that this door open and this woman got out the six-foot woman of huge black hair a big fur coat enormous breasts in a kind of tiger skin bikini and she went to the back of the car and she opened the door and the whole of this fan inside was a kind of a boudoir had a glitter ball on the ceiling it had tiger skin walls and at a pink bed on the floor and then she stood beside and she saw me and said hey you you want sugar and she opened her coat and in her bikini she had the most enormous thing if that wasn't enough because she all she saw my look of horror she said and I got sugar too and she turned away she had these little old kind of goats haunches and I became friends with this girl and she was called Delphine my whole exchange course I spent sitting in the front of her truck while she beat men up in the back of it and it was extraordinary a trip really then she died I mean it was an awful ending the story she moved her truck in the end to she decided to get out of Paris she thought she'd going working the countryside and she got shot by farmers I dunno why that sort of funny it's like yeah she was found shot by farmers but little bit bullets anyway no it's not funny here's an interesting story I gotta where to go with that Oh actually it's back money this is the next story but a granny gray suffer from headaches right went to the doctors and found that she had a bullet in her head this is all linked now I'm no medical expert but I believe the headaches could have been caused by the bullets in her head they could of course be it also caused by the frisbee in her nose quite painful right there wouldn't you the son she then when she saw this x-ray she then recalled being shot in 1943 you could easily forget that when two shops and we'll shoot what does that remember I doing lying pool of my own blood went to the library eventually eventually the doctors found the rusty bullet can't have been fun looking at granny's rusty bullet hole here she is whoa she's fine her name is Jin Jin gang gang side time the metal bullet hitting the metal thing

Channel: 220GuiltySquid

Views: 541,416

Rating: 4.7081785 out of 5

Keywords: graham norton, graham norton show 2007, graham norton season 1 episode 13, graham norton miriam margolyes rupert everett, graham norton miriam margolyes, graham norton rupert everette, graham norton the zimmers, the zimmers interview, miriam margolyes interview, rupert everette interview, 220guiltysquid

Id: -csCsOkW1U4

Length: 21min 4sec (1264 seconds)

Published: Sun Jan 19 2014