Gabriel Iglesias - I Just Turned On A Man

[Applause] [Music] [Applause] that's a long walk one thing I got to give it up to you guys is your air you guys can breathe here I live in Los Angeles and I didn't realize I was being deprived of oxygen I got off the plane here I took a deep breath I was like oh my god I can do math [Applause] you know and then we flew it was totally nice flying it I won't say what airline cos it wasn't this one but anyway they said you can't say the names you don't want to offend those sponsors and stuff and uh you know big hand for West yet start carrying bigger seats so fluffy people can enjoy the ride no matter what seat on man even if it's first class it feels like Coach but no man it was uh it was a rough ride coming over here and kind of had a little food I got a light we hit a little air pocket and the plane dropped like 50 feet like that I'm sorry I don't care how tough you are when you're in the sky and you fall out of the sky I'm not gonna lie I was gay for five seconds I was a Brokeback Mexican yes LS I got recognized by one of these guys who comes up to me right he just walks up and he's staring yeah and I know the look he's looking at me like I look at Paco's just yes you know because you're so funny can I hug you in a line all right and I gave the guy a hug and he's like in my ear he goes you're gorgeous at first in my head I was like but then I thought about it oh my god I just turned on a man shoe oh my girlfriend I said you better not mess up I have options favorite time for me in my life was when I played football in high school and I've always been a big guy so of course when you're a big guy on a football team they put you on the front line on a bunch of other big guys are right in front of you you're looking at each other and you're saying stuff to one another to try to intimidate the other guy he's looking at me I'm gonna kick your ass I'd look at him and go this city is not fluffy friendly I've been to some of the diners what's simple that no tables only booths in certain restaurants that sucks and you guys know exactly what I'm talking about because we can get into the booth but then we eat oh that sucks and then you get out and you go home and take off your shirt and you've got that red line going across right here that's what I love amusment parks I love them but I can't enjoy them because they're not fluffy friendly you try to get on the ride and they got all the safety restraints you know bringing your fluffy like us that's not gonna happen right that's why I miss the old rollercoasters 1 bar 3 clicks that was it right we never felt we never fall seriously we never bug you know who falls the skinny guy who sat next to us that's Sioux Falls that's a friggin [Applause] never long and my buddy mondo is built like me just like me since we need to get on a ride what are we gonna get up he goes they have a ride here it's like a log ride and you get inside the log ride and it goes up the hill down the hill makes a splash I go huh what about the pool bar there's no pool bar seat belt no seat belt you just get in and go like well let's do it so we get in line and we get to the front of the line right now we got to deal with the lady with the headset the one who takes your job way too serious how many people okay three there two there we get to the you guys can have that one and she gave us our own log so we jumped in she pulls a lever we take off we're splishing and splashing right three minutes into the ride the moment of truth we get to the hill [Applause] [Applause] my friend turns around he looks and he says Gabriel let's flash the camera I said you stupid on three forgets we get off of the ride we're soaking wet we go to the bottom of the hill we want to go by that picture we get there and there's a lady behind a counter with a bunch of monitors behind her and she's covering one of the monitors I tell my buddy what boat are we on twenty-two she's covering screen 22 cuz oh we better sneak out of here oh yeah we're gonna sneak out of here frigging we get stopped by security and you haven't lived until you've been stopped by a security guard with a badge in the shape of a mouse this guy swore I'd hold on ma'am can you move your hand thank you you guys see that photo right there you see that that's a disgrace we can't believe anyone could take such a photo at this park do you guys recognize the two large women in this picture and it wasn't until we got like this close to the photo that we realized something about ourselves and that is that when two full-grown fluffy men are going downhill at a 45 degree angle with no shirts on going like this we both look like sexy [ __ ] Toronto you guys were amazing thank you very much thank you thinking thinking thinking thinking thinking thank you [Applause] [Music] [Applause] you you

Channel: Just For Laughs

Views: 9,820,198

Keywords: Just for Laughs, JFL, Stand Up Comedy, Stand up, Comedy, Comedian, Montreal, Stand up comedians, comedians, best stand up, stand up comedian, youtube stand up, youtube comedy, just for laugh, Gabriel Iglesias, gabriel iglesias stand up, gabriel iglesias standup, gabriel iglesias comedy, gabriel iglesias comedian, gabriel iglesias youtube, youtube gabriel iglesias, Gabriel Iglesias JFL, Fluffy JFL, Gabriel Iglesias I Just Turned On A Man, Just For Laughs Gabriel Iglesias

Id: Pc5KfDv94Iw

Length: 6min 59sec (419 seconds)

Published: Mon Sep 25 2017