Finding Our Positive Self Talk | Sandra Fuentes | TEDxGoshen

hello everyone it is so great to be here in front of a live audience it feels so good doesn't it thank you i want you to take a moment and think about how many times you talk to yourself in one day what was the first thing you said to yourself this morning before you opened your eyes i want you to hold on to those words i talk to myself about a hundred times a day and that's not exaggerating first thing i said to myself this morning breathe and then i said and i realized what was happening tonight i said do not trip on stage if some of you have seen my social media videos you know exactly where i'm going with this i have tripped in front of a live audience i have knocked things over my family can attest to that and i have stumbled over my words my words so think about this our words we get stuck using negative phrases negative words all the time we beat ourselves up i know we've heard this before i can't finish my homework there's not enough time i will never meet the right person i'm always home and then this one i have gained so much weight i do not fit into any of my clothes we talk about ourselves to ourselves all the time but it's when we turn those negative phrases those negative comments into something more positive i can finish my homework i will meet someone i am beautiful it's hard it's very hard i'm not going to lie to you but it can be done i've had to do it and when i say it has to become my morning my afternoon and my night that's what gets me through the day so yes i talk to myself a lot i own a women's clothing store and gift shop my vision was to create a comfortable space where people would feel confident walking through the door without any judgment we created this personal shopping experience because that's what it's all about it's about the people walking through the door it's not about me we have these signs all over the walls so when you walk in you feel our messages take your place make your mark and live your life we all want to feel our best we want to laugh don't we we want to feel inspired that's part of our self-care this one she's in the fitting room be the best version of you this one beauty does come in all shapes and sizes you might get a laugh out of this one you decide which one you are and this next one here well this speaks for itself i want to tell you a story there was a woman that walked into the store with this little boy she's walking around and i could hear her talking to herself i can't wear this this will never fit so i give her a moment and then i ask her if there's something i can help her with she smiles and she looks at me and she says darling everything is beautiful in here but i could never wear anything i'm much too old i'm a grandmother as she points to the little boy so i laugh and i say to her do you have a few minutes i said sure i said i'm going to put something together for you put it in the fitting room and then you tell me how you feel so she she smiles i bring her over to the fitting room about two minutes pass and all of a sudden i'm at my desk she opens up those curtains and she looks at me and she says i cannot believe that this fits the face the smile she said i can't tell you the last time i put on a pair of denim i smiled i looked at her and then her little grandson was with her sitting in the chair and i said but how do you feel she said i feel like a million bucks true story i replied back to her and i said that's what i wanted to hear so we had a cute little laugh and i said i'll meet you over by the desk right so she comes over she's cashing out and as she's leaving she turns and she looks at me as she's walking out the door said i want to thank you for making me feel so good about myself i will see you next week i smiled and i said thank you one week later there we were coveted i didn't want to get out of bed i didn't even want to open my eyes i was depressed completely defeated everything i had worked we had worked so hard for was falling to pieces i was numb there's no other words but num all those signs that i hand picked for the boutique meant nothing they disappeared as if they didn't even exist that's when we knew we had to recreate the store i knew i had to change my way of thinking i had stopped all of the negative comments all of the negative head chatter i had to reinvent myself talk about a deep conversation we did it we went online at that time everything was shop from home because that's what everyone was doing you're on your phones you're on your computer i figured it out i had to create a website knew nothing about websites but i had to do it i had to become focused i had to become determined and i had to become productive every single day we went online social media the facebook i mean everyone was shopping from home instagram personal shopping virtual shopping who would have thought we had to do it i knew it was the survival of our business that if we didn't think if i didn't think of something better i wouldn't have been able to reopen our door i had to do these live videos in front of a live audience do you know how hard that is but it feels good i want you to go back to those words that you said to yourself this morning before you opened your eyes some of you well maybe you'll laugh at what you said others may have realized that something has changed the struggles that we face the obstacles that are thrown in front of us the unthinkable situations they make us tired very tired but i know i know it's an opportunity to make us stronger and it makes us stronger and better as long as we stay committed and positive i can i will end of story thank you you

Channel: TEDx Talks

Views: 28,781

Keywords: Business, English, Life, Life Development, Positive Thinking, Self improvement, TEDxTalks, Truth

Id: h8b7nbi9bgA

Length: 11min 29sec (689 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 10 2021