Father Mike's Funniest Moments - Part 2

and look at this restaurant is phenomenal like all the people here and he said that's where you're wrong I was like what do you mean because he says you look around and you see all of the people sitting in the seats he says I look around as the owner and I see all of the empty seats I'm like oh that's what I do in math like are you trying to tell me that when you go to Mass I don't get anything cuz all that happens is the god of the universe transforms bread and wine into his body and blood and feeds me with himself that's but I don't get anything out of mass at one point one of the college students was talking to a small group and said I'll follow Mike's pretty funny isn't he and one of the high school students said well I mean he's like priest funny he's not really funny but he's kind of funny because you're not expecting that of a priest and when I heard that I was like oh yeah that's true if you enjoying this video please like and share it I'm putting together father Mike's funniest accenture presents moments please subscribe and hit the bell should be notified when that comes out and I'm never going for a holy communion it was like I was like just so excited this is like really it's really him you know I'm saying never received one source even he's like the body of Christ I'm like Amen for real this time you know kind of thing and I get asked to do this thing Bishop can I go to that thing yes like great he says no great I'm jealousy a priest cuz you have someone telling you what to do I'm like just get married you can do that the same thing like hey just never like your first date and remember we're walking next to them you know you kind of walk in on the street and all of a sudden you do this like hand bump thing if you're a guy this what you did you're walking along and you're like okay you're timing the bumps right so like okay so like okay walking bump mm-hmm bump and grab like I remember the first time I ever went on a date before I was a seminarian and now still manera nice you know arm risks with this girl and pretty soon my hand was like cousin it on the Addams Family it's kind of this creeping over like yeah this is nice I mean honestly I'm sitting there the entire time like this is I can't believe this I've made it I've arrived and drunkards is right before slanderers or gossips I just wanted to vent hell I'm even in weird ways jesus heals people to prove that he is who he says he is Jesus walks up to this man he can't hear and he can't speak and so it says in the scripture that Jesus walks up to the man puts his fingers in his ears then spitting touches his tongue and says be opened imagine if you were that guy you don't know what's going on here I mean you can't hear right this guy's coming up hey hey come here no it's okay touch is your tongue what are you doing people of a certain age of a certain gender who are getting increasingly mad that their friends are getting engaged and some of them maybe in this room on your Facebook have you experienced an abundance in the last three weeks of like oh well now they're engaged everyone the whole world is engaged what's happening to this kind of thing and what happens it's all I'm happy for them I'm happy for them I'm happy for them like what's wrong with me like little giants you know movies up their ragtag group of kids who put together a football team or Mighty Ducks with a ragtag group of little kids have put together a hockey team a lot of ragtag groups of kids running around we call them gangs now but back then they used to be like sporting teams and then this crazy thing is when they get there the stone is rolled back and you'd think they'd be like oh yeah was that today awesome Mary Magdalene stays right and Jesus looks at her says Mary and then me then Marie's eyes are open right she's like all rub on I you know he's awesome my mom she has a birthday on November 4th most every year and did you know how fast you were going and I said I think I was probably going 75 it was a 55 fYI and um yeah it was I was late for math you guys I have to like automatically give you a ticket because on the third warning it's three strikes ticket but he says but you know you know you're honest with me and you know you're on your way to church and the state's gonna give you some grace today so here's your warning read it rip it up please drive the speed limit I'm like thank you so much I was so grateful you know this day I love that the state is gonna give you some grace today Thank You state of Minnesota for giving me what I'm accustomed to receive from the church because some of you a couple of you are called to marriage the rest are called to be priests and nuns but a couple of you're called to marriage ten like I didn't read that message that's why you need to this disable the function on your text messages that says read thanks man if you haven't done that that means you're someone's parent or grandparent um living in Spokane Washington he put just interrupted my story living in Spokane it's like not eating meat on Fridays or having to fast during Lent where it's like if you didn't even if you wanted a date without me normally you'd be like okay fine whatever but if someone tells you no today you can't have meat it's like I want meat so much it's not it's not because you want meat more that day it's because like well someone else is telling me I can't have it but I want a new pope and now daddy and

Channel: The Joy of the Faith

Views: 54,383

Keywords: father mike schmitz, father mike schmitz relationships, father mike schmitz confession, fr mike schmitz, fr mike schmitz confession, fr mike schmitz advent, fr mike ascension presents, fr mike ascension press, fr mike schmitz ascension presents, father mike ascension presents, father mike ascension, ascension press father mike, father michael schmitz, father michael schmidt, the joy of the faith, fulton sheens funniest moments

Id: G6hqZCb33Oc

Length: 5min 44sec (344 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 16 2020