EX-NECKBEARDS Share CRINGEWORTHY Stories

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Exce neckman's of Reddit when did you realize you were one of those guys any cringe-worthy stories you'd like to share I was quite the neck but throughout high school I was really overweight so I subconsciously thought by sounding smarted would make up for it I wasn't very bright as for an embarrassing story there was a period of a few months where I called every girl I knew by m'lady not making that [ __ ] up holy [ __ ] I just punched myself in the face I'm glad you have realized your ways early last year when my girlfriend at the time broke up with me I thought I was so unbelievably awesome that it was a mistake looking back at the way I acted I realized I was a total tool at the time it took a lot of self-examination for me to realize talking down to people and treating them like garbage isn't a way to make friends or really have anyone like you I have dated two of you one of them is a friend of mine now he's a better person the other he's going to end up in jail from his inability to believe he could be wrong was in - Wow way too much skipping duty and work ignoring responsibilities the South Park episode premiered with the fat dude who wore a wrist brace and a chip bowl on his lap and a greasy shirt playing Wow with no joy just emotionless boredom clicking away I looked down to see a bowl of chips I didn't even remember getting myself and a shirt I had wore for three days got up mid radon whoo-hoo 30% got a shower uninstalled left a goodbye message on our guilds forum six months later I had a girlfriend again and suddenly wasn't blaming everyone else for my depression and loneliness oh god haha I can imagine that episode must have hit home for a lot of people and encourage change I have to give them props for that it really was a what the duck is wrong with me moment and that shower I relived all the obvious signs friends and family gave me that I ignored because of this lifestyle boss slash cow walkers who were concerned I was tired all the time family concerned about my manners and posture that both completely declined will life friends guys I served with telling me to grow the duck up it was hard humbling up and apologizing for the next while 11th grade god damn 2011 was a bad year for me I became self-aware around senior year but towards the end and even then I still became more self-aware only in the past year that was also when I started shaving my neck but as well but now I have a trimmed well-kept beard I thought I was some kind of musical genius for some reason I was super into tulle back then and I remember I told ducking everyone that I was gonna make a four-song prog rock / metal concept album on conic sections yeah I can't listen to tall or dream theater anymore because they bring back so much cringe back then I was also all duck in which friend-zoned me if I could meet my seventeen year old self I would slap the [ __ ] out of me when people stopped inviting me to things / events duck man at least you got invited to things I remember a time in high school when I was so absorbed in myself that over a course of six months I realized no one invited me to anything I just showed up younger me was cringeworthy how what would be going through your mind the groups of people I would eat lunch with would make plans and I would just assume I was included I guess they were too nice to say anything else but I didn't have much in common with them hence why they didn't directly invite me to things I since moved on and made friends with people who I actually had things in common with I'm a field biologist during the summer and this past summer I decided to take the opportunity to grow out my beard because that's a few less items in my field gear it went ok but two stories come to mind that made me question the way I present myself I was asked if I was on my way to Burning Man I shaved that afternoon I was told I looked tetchy at a small Museum those local History Museum some small towns have they asked if I could fix their AB system at a small Museum I did I was never an egg boat but that was only because I couldn't grow one for [ __ ] I was however a total fedora all through middle and high school I didn't even realize it until my freshman year of college when a girl asked out told me flat-out that she didn't see me romantically at all but she'd be totally fine with going for coffee as friends I was pissed at first but said yes in hopes that I could turn her around on the matter she called me on my [ __ ] after about 12 seconds and said I want to get to know you better but if you keep acting like that we can't be friends I don't know why but it got to me I guess I realized that I valued her potential friendship more than her potential as a sexual partner she quickly became one of my best friends in the entire world and she helped me through a lot of issues with girls throughout college moral of the story you can change and the friendzone can be the greatest place in the world entering a long-term relationship really put my [ __ ] in check I used to wear an ugly fedora playing a program and self professed my music elitism and blamed the women who frames owned me as being superficial seriously date someone who will make you a better person prog rock is still cool though the summer after I graduated high school me and my buddy got into wearing fedoras not because we thought they were cool or anything we just thought it looked funny and we enjoyed them we wore them with cut-offs and gym shorts and dirty jeans at work and just whatever we didn't behave like neckbeards we just looked like them well about a year and half later I made her a dit account and that's when I realized how horrific my corncob pipe smoke in fedora wearing phase was god I hate so many things about the choices I make edit to be clear we made the decision to stop wearing them completely on our own it wasn't until just over a year arsh later that I started to realize how terrible of a decision it was as in I did not stop wearing it because of reddit I just stopped wearing it not about me I once knew a guy who at a glance one might label as that guy this was in high school the guy had a neck but he was always on his laptop wore the t-shirts and car keys all the time and he always had a fedora he wasn't fat to his credit that guy was genuinely a cool person he was intelligent funny affable and super friendly halav a dude we chat about everything from games to literature to shoes we'd share anecdotes we'd joke and it was never really boring or awkward he was a thoughtful person I was generally awake at that time of day and we got on great I'm glad I didn't judge him based on appearances sometimes it pays to be open-minded and not to write people off just thought I'd share a positive story to even out the painful ones I own a fedora or it will be or duck whatever I got it because I was in a jazz band and I thought it would be appropriate and make me cooler it did neither going home listening to jazz and practicing and playing better solos made me cooler also I went through a phrase where whenever I got rejected I would blame the girl by saying I was friend-zoned it was her fault for not seeing my qualities apparently I think I'm out of that phase oh dear I hope I am I used to watch My Little Pony I stopped after I watched a video of a con and realized who I being grouped with I used to be proud of watching it when I think about any sentence I said about MLP I feel awful and try to forget I used to watch a thing but then losers watched it so I no doubt I was a girl so I couldn't be the traditional straight male entitled neck bird that I was a total ass with a superiority complex I was bullied / ostracized a bit in high school because I had social anxiety was super awkward overweight and accidentally non gender conforming I was home sholde until high school no one told me girls shave their legs or have long hair or sit with their legs together so I overcompensated by reminding myself that I was much smarter than everyone else and also that I was a much better person because I was agnostic liberal and tolerant of gay / transgender rights I was from a super conservative Christian homophobic town I was that uh soul who couldn't stop talking about 1984 and the government I thought of other people as sheep I didn't really get angry / but that about boys not liking me that I secretly fancied myself as the kind of misunderstood Fedora type portrayed in Taylor Swift's you belong with me not that I would have listened to Taylor Swift because I was a huge music a latest who loved to talk [ __ ] about how much Justin Bieber and pop music suck other girls were [ __ ] and did see while I was some kind of cultured intellectual who doesn't have to wear loads of makeup just to make boys like her I never really had a moment of realization though I moved to a big liberal gay City after college felt better about myself and tried to be nicer to other people and just sort of gradually grew up whoa or thread I can relate to December 17th 2012 cracked point com published 6 harsh truths that will make you a better person I literally fell into every rabbit hole the article pointed out to the point where it easily cold bean cults 6 harsh truths that will make you realize your pathetic JSP 27 from then on I decided to make sure I would stop being an emotional whiner and pathetic then in May of 2013 I realized I was so incredibly unfit I needed to start hitting the gym I haven't been in a couple of weeks so I had fallen off the wagon somewhat but I'm nowhere near as bad as I was one year ago cringe-worthy stories oh Jesus where do I begin one I argued atheism with my Catholic best friend to the point where I almost unilaterally killed our friendship and the best part is I'm not even atheist yeah think about that one for a minute edit I'm Jewish in case anyone is wondering not totally religious but definitely not atheist - I'm such a nice guy was my ducking mantra from about 2008 to 2012 2008 to 2012 were also for years I like to call undergrad I for some reason thought I deserved to be in a relationship because I wasn't a dauch a bag like the rest of the guys out there no I wasn't in a relationship because I was a fat duck who complained about everything and had a toxic personality 3 I thought I was so ducking cool with my fraternity when we threw parties and instead of drinking cheap beer like a normal person I brought flasks full of cheap scotch and I offered it to women I offered it to women at fraternity parties what the hell was I thinking for fat logic up in this [ __ ] I have bad genetics no I didn't I had laziness as in I shall beaten less than three times per day and maybe should have avoided getting second helpings or third helpings at the dining hall five Oh God I really don't want to tell this story but I feel like this could potentially help people or give you guys a laugh I asked out a woman once with mems when I was 21 in 2011 she didn't take too kindly to it and then I called her a [ __ ] who only dates doubt she bags and not nice guys like me nope I did not see the blatant hypocrisy there at all at the time six creepily dated two women one in 2010 and another in 2011 by pretending to be the all-knowing junior / senior in college when they were freshmen yeah I didn't think to myself you have to pretend to act all wise to get a woman to talk to you you think I would have realized it before December 2012 as in seven months after I graduated college nope I didn't realize how bad it was I apologized to them and that was still pretty awkward and cringe-worthy so there you have it today I'm still pretty awkward but I've been told it's charming hopefully my friends actually mean it furthermore I have a tough time seeing my old fraternity brothers because it reminds me of a time that I really would rather not look back on but it still captured those late blunder years of mine I probably have more cringe-worthy stories if anyone wants to read them a girl that I crushed on for three years commented on one of my Instagram posts featuring a cannily saying oMG give me me and all of my neck bad attitude figured it would be wise to buy another and drive to her house after school give it to her surprise her have her fall hopelessly in love with me and we would ride my Segway into the sunrise I bought it it melted in my car I got lost arrived at her house two hours later turns out she wasn't there so I drive to her friend's house two hours later again the cannily now bears little resemblance to its true form arrived sweating like a pig hand her the floppy limp dick of a desert to her stand there awkwardly for five minutes then drive all the way back home make a bad luck Brian mean feeling sorry for myself you have been visited by the source Chihuahua you will be blessed with good pasta but only if you comment symma well papa
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Channel: TZ Entertainment
Views: 220,173
Rating: 4.8892989 out of 5
Keywords: reddit, askreddit, askreddit funny, top posts, top posts of r/, r/, r/askreddit, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, top posts of all time, askreddit question, askreddit top posts, ask reddit, askreddit reading, subreddit, reddit stories, best of r/askreddit, funny reddit, best reddit posts, best of reddit, Updoot Reddit, reddit and chill, toadfilms, Women, men, incel, neckbeard, creepy men, mlady
Id: wPnC-_vpqqc
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Length: 13min 56sec (836 seconds)
Published: Mon Jul 08 2019
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