Every Joke In Avengers: Age Of Ultron

language wait a second no one else is gonna deal with the fact that cap just said language I know just slipped out who gave the order to attack Herr Strucker is the Avengers can we hold them the Avengers I'm going to surrender you didn't see that coming somebody want to deal with that bunker thank you fine accept it and for gosh sake watch your language that's not going away anytime soon guys stop we got to talk this through it's good talk Thor report on the Hulk the gates of hell are filled with the screams of his victims but not the screams of the dead of course no no wounded screams mainly wintering great deal of complaining and tales of sprained deltoids and gout labs all set up boss Oh actually he's the boss I just paid for everything and design everything make him look cooler he's got increased metabolism and improved thermal homeostasis her thing is neuroelectric interfacing telekinesis mental manipulation she's fast and she's weird how's he doing unfortunately he's still Barton that's terrible if you brought him to my lab the regeneration cradle could do this in 20 minutes oh he's flatlining call it time and Helen I expect to see you at the party on Saturday unlike you I don't have a lot of time for parties well Thor either so I take the tank fly it right up to the generals Palace drop it at his feet I'm like boom you looking for this boom are you looking why do I even talk to you guys everywhere else that story kills that's the whole story yes war machine story oh this is very good then quality saves where are the ladies gentlemen Oh miss Potts has a company to run as I'm not even sure what country Jane's in her work and the convergence is made of the world's foremost astronomer and the company that pepper runs is the largest tech conglomerate on earth it's pretty exciting there's even talk of Jane getting a Nobel Prize yeah I think they must be busy because they'd hate missing you guys get together but Jane's better sounds like a hell of a fight sorry I'm missing if I had known it was gonna be a firefight I absolutely would have called I'm not actually sorry I'm just trying to sound tough you find a place in Brooklyn yet I don't think I can afford a place in Brooklyn right up to the generals Palace I drop it at his feet I might boom you looking for this [Laughter] spends his life avoiding the fight because he knows Owen sounds amazing he's also a huge dork checks did that I seen her flirt I'm close you think that as maybe the world's leading authority on waiting too long don't what do you mean up close you've had a tough week we won't hold it against you if you can't get it up it's physics right so if I lift it I then rule Asgard yes of course I will be reinstituting prima nocta bet your ass Steve he said a bad language word do you tell everyone it's a very very interesting theory I have a simpler one you're all not worthy sorry don't turn green why is he trying to kill us you just roll over show your belly every time somebody snarls only when I've created a murder bot people create smaller people children lost the word there is that what you've come to end the Avengers I've come to save the world but also yeah Ultron killed Strucker and he did a Banksy the crime scene when back in the day he operates off the African coast black market arms there are conventions and meet people I didn't sell him anything strucker's prize pupils candy everybody is afraid of something cuttlefish deep-sea fish they make lots this cannot swim to hypnotize their prey and then I saw a documentary terrified I'm look at me do I look like Iron Man Stark I'm sorry I'm so I'm sure that's gonna be ok I'm sorry nobody has to break anything clearly you've never made an omelet you beat me by one second I know you've suffered I can't physically throw up in my mouth the girl tried to walk my mind take special care I doubt a human can keep her at bay fortunately I am mighty we've done the whole mind control thing not a fan yeah you better run sleep sweet sleepy [Music] how could they can we buy this building this is an agent of some kind molar agents sorry for barging in oh yeah we would have called ahead but we were busy having no idea that you existed what about that dr. banner how long does happen going on as what okay madam banner I'll explain when you're older Hawkeye you know I totally support your avenging I can feel the difference don't take from my pile what else you do me a favor try not to bring it to life it's been a really long day like Eugene O'Neill long you know the director of me I'm not the director of anybody I like the look you're going for inconspicuous though near miss I need your help it's nice to be needed it's dangerous I'd be disappointed if it wasn't guys multiplying faster than a Catholic rabbit outwit the Platinum bastard Steve doesn't like that kind of talk you know what romanov the most versatile substance on the planet Emily used it to make a frisbee an Android design pirate robot you know I really miss the days when the weirdest thing science ever created was me oh well I'm decrypting nuclear codes and you don't want me tell you it's all Tron space consciousness informational noise so now see I'm not being pushy happy I'm gonna try and keep them that way you're not a match from a captain thanks partner what do you think I've been doing if you could fry whatever operational system Cho implanted yeah about that no you have to trust me time to don't you want me to help you put Jarvis into this thing no of course not I want to help you put Jarvis in this thing this is the opportunity we can create Ultron's perfect self we have to I believe what you can see that coming then why would you bring stock is right oh it's definitely the end times but we need to go right well done I get first crack at the big guy my man's when he's waiting for that's true he hates you the most through the city No have you been juicing little vibranium cocktail you're looking I don't want to say puffy hi cap get incoming incoming already came in you get hurt hurt them back you get killed walk it off okay look the city is flying we're fighting an army of robots and I have a bow and arrow none of this makes sense you can't save you'll never why were you napping for you were bothering me Wow hi coming to you nobody would know nobody that sighs well I'm an old trauma sitting on him oh yeah I'll be missed little bastard I miss him already pull her out of mothballs with a couple of old friends she's dusty but she'll do fury you son of a [ __ ] whoa you kiss your mother with that mouth yes now this is gonna be a good story if you live to tell it you think I can't hold my own we get through this I'll hold your own you had to make it weird number six boat is topped and locked door or stock top it it's full of people it's terribly well-balanced well if there's too much weight you lose power on the swing Romanoff you and banner better not be playing hide the zucchini [Applause] okay what I'm not going to leave you here come back for me when everyone else is off not before hmm you understand you know I'm 12 months older than you oh for God's sake you're unbearably naive well I was born yesterday but if you put the hammer in an elevator would still go up elevators not worthy I'm gonna miss these little talks of ours huh you think you could find out what's coming I do besides this one there's nothing that can't be explained that man has no regard for lawn maintenance want to keep staring at the wall or do you want to go to work I mean it's a pretty interesting thought you and Tony we're still gazing into each other's eyes

Channel: Meme Machine

Views: 22,296,542

Rating: 4.9232392 out of 5

Keywords: Avengers, Avengers age of ultron, avengers jokes, avengers age of ultron jokes, marvel, marvel cinemaric universe, mcu, avengers 2, Every joke in Avengers: age of ultron, every joke in avengers age of ultron, wanda, vision, wandavision, disney, Disney +, Disney plus, falcon, winter soldier, avengers funny moments, age of ultron funny moments, hide the zucchini, observations

Id: gu-nJ3DUpqw

Length: 12min 46sec (766 seconds)

Published: Tue Mar 14 2017

Reddit Comments

[u/v1p3rsbite]

Tony saying “Good talk” after he shoots those little stun missiles, and that feeble reply of “no it wasn’t” cracks me up every time.

[u/BornIn1980Fine]

I loved the scene where they were just sitting around talking and messing with thors hammer. There needs to be more of that in the next movies. Also wtf was up with scarlett witch's weird ass twitchy the ring walk out of the room when cap comes in to confront strucker?

[u/Groot_2709]

Hopefully Avengers 4 will have more of these in-team jokes and conversations! In my opinion they were the best part of this movie and really showed them as a team!