Dr Gabor Maté’s Ultimate Advice for Younger Self

you have to believe in your own truth and you have to deepen your relationship to your truth and you'll connect with people that are also seeking the same truth as you are even if they don't see the way you do so never be afraid of you on truth and to explore it also don't be afraid to let go of it if you find that there's a deeper truth that speaks to you and at the same time whatever you do out there in the world do an equal amount of work internally because if you don't your work in the world will not be as effective my wife said to me literally she said to me addressing my workaholism she said look you've got to realize you're a workaholic and so that challenged me and so i really had to make a decision of of what kind of life do i really want now the work is very satisfying and there's a lot of appreciation for it out there in the world but at the same time if i identify with it if i make it my identity and and who i am i deplete myself and i suffer and i impose suffering in my in my primary relationship as well so i've really had to look at my life so i have slowed down and and uh literally now every invitation i get has to be vetted and approved by my wife which is not a matter of yielding control to her it's a matter of recognizing that and i need support in making these decisions and as a result of that i'm enjoying life a lot more and at the beginning of your movie uh uh our in mind john joseph says that we have to suffer to seek the truth some worse to that effect and whether he knows it or not he's quoting the great greek playwright aeschylus who in his agamemnon the chorus says be human being suffering to truth so literally it was that suffering imposed by my workholism that led me to have to make decisions and to understand the truth if you could pick up the phone and make a call to the 20 year old gabor and give that young man a bit of advice what would you tell him where was he getting his medical degree no he wasn't he was at that time his add was too powerful he couldn't go to medical school yet because that took more concentration and discipline than i was ready for i didn't go to medical school tonight i was until i was 28. so what i say to a 20 year old look inside at that time i was going to save the world through politics not to ignore the politics but be at least as much attention internally or more when you're casting on the outside and you don't have to work so hard to be liked and loved you're okay just relax kid you know and allow life to come to you you don't have to force it and uh open your heart don't don't just focus on your clever brain so much you know open your heart and see what possibilities reveal themselves to you and that it's not your fault the way the world is and even the way you are it's not your fault it's not a fault just accept yourself what is the best advice you've ever received in your life i'm a colleague a co-worker i'll i'll tell you two things one is i had an aunt who was a physician herself and she had not wanted to be a doctor she wanted to be a writer but complying with her father's wishes she went to medical school and she was taken to auschwitz where you saw she saw her parents taken in one direction to the gas chambers and she was sent in another and very sensitive very wounded soul but she saw me much more clearly when i was younger than i could see myself and once she quoted shakespeare to me and i know it's a cliche and i know that it's in the mouth of the character polonius in whom shakespeare puts this phrase it's even hypocrisy but it's so true and she said to me she wrote to me to dine on self be true you know i wish i had understood what that meant but that's the best advice i got and then when i was a physician but i but the part of me that wanted to write hadn't really expressed himself because that was really in me to write and to share something with the world and i had a patient who used to be an english professor at the university of british columbia he was quite a well-known canadian poet warren talman i said to him when he came to the office once for a medical visit i said warren i want to write but i don't know what and he said don't everybody said don't worry about it he said you were right when you're struggling to teach the world and that's what happened there's a lot of people out there who see the truth but they don't control the media and they don't write the scripts for most movies um so therefore you might not get validation out there but you have to believe in your own truth and you have to deepen your relationship to your truth and you'll connect with people that are also seeking the same truth as you are even if they don't see it the way you do so never be afraid of your own truth um and to explore it also don't be afraid to let go of it if you find that there's a deeper truth that speaks to you and at the same time whatever you do out there in the world do an equal amount of work internally [Music] because if you don't your work in the world will not be as effective [Music] you

Channel: Motivation Thrive

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Keywords: dr gabor mate, gabor maté, advice for 20 year olds, advice for young people, i wish i learned this when i was younger, Motivation Thrive

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Length: 6min 34sec (394 seconds)

Published: Mon Dec 07 2020