Hello everybody, my name is Markiplier and welcome to the "Don't Laugh Challenge" We got Bob, Wade and Tyler. ...and Ethan.
I wasn't gonna forget, I wasn't gonna forget you
Ethan: I thought you were gonna leave me out We got Bob, Wade and Tyler, And that's it! Nobody else. Amy's over there. Hiiii!
(what, no intro for Chica?) Mark: Okie dokie, thanks for the great positivity. Well... Others: Oh, wow. Ethan: She's not laughing, and neither will you be.
Mark: We're gonna... Yep, that's right. This is the "Don't Laugh Challenge" which is true to its name. We're not gonna laugh, so Wade's gonna go first cause he's like the hardest to make laugh probably of all of us. Uh, so, we're gonna attempt to make him laugh. We've got a new selection of props. Here's a glorious insert of all of our props with angelic choir music, intro anime explosions, Ethan: Why are you making this so difficult every video?
Mark: *laughter* Also, here's an elaborate score board for the exact times and dates of with, which people laugh. Spoiler alert! Here's the end result! Anyway, it's late. We are tired. We just ate a lot of chicken and dumplings. So if we laugh, we are probably gonna vomit
Bob: Oh, yeah.
Mark: if laugh at all. This is the least funny part of our entire lives. Here we go! Bob: SQUUUUUAAAAAAA Collective: SQUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAD! *poor Wade* Mark: We have two minutes. We're gonna make it two full minutes, two looong minutes, that you have to not laugh. Amy: I don't think I have a... Mark: You thinking about dead people? *nod in confirmation* *Tyler plays kazoo* Tyler: I'm an elephant. Mark: What's up my Cranky Crew?
Ethan: FUCK! Ethan: I knew you were gonna do that bullshit!
*Mark giggles* "Ethan": I'm Ethan, and this is CraaAaank Gameplays! Ethan: That's not my intro! "Ethan": I'm gonna play some Happy Wheels for all you guys I looooooove Jacksepticeye! Woooooo! Yar, I'm a pirate. Top o' the mornin' to ya laddies. Mark: I'm Jacksepticeye.
Bob: *moans* Tyler: This feels good. Bob: Oh my God, he's so excited. *Mark giggles* Hello everybody, I'm old Markiplier and we're gonna play some Amnesia Custom Stories today. I have a fake laugh. *laughs high pitch* Mark: I'm gonna stab you in the balls! Ethan: He gotcha!
Mark: Nope. Mark: I'm gonna stab you in the ear!
Ethan: Wow! Mark: Top of your head.
Ethan: What a reaction! Ethan: Alright. Mark: Alright, goodbye then. Bob: You gotta smell this. Wade, you gotta smell-
Mark: Smell that? *giggles* Bob: Look I'm not gonna touch you, just smell.
*Car horn ending round* Mark: Well, that sucked ass and dick.
Ethan: It's me, Ethan: LordMinion777. Mark: Alright, fine. Fuck it, you're outta here.
Ethan: I'm gonna go. Mark: Spit your water out, like a...
Wade: I swallowed it. Mark: Oh, gross. Mark: K, ready?
Ethan: Mmhm. Mark: Two minutes on the timer. Mark: After you. Tyler: I'm Craaaank Gameplays! Tyler: Welcome my Cranky Crew!
Mark: That's- Mark: That's not the- Wade: Crank, crank, crank! Mark: That's not the intro at all. Mark: Hi, I'm Crank Gameplays before I dyed my hair to copy all the other YouTubers. Tyler: Genital jousting.
Mark: Why is my channel still dying Mark: *giggling* even though I'm so desperate? *Mark old man groan* Mark: Oh boy! Mark: I came to see the good circumcision.
Bob: *samurai noise* Bob: Are you ready?
Mark: This doctor's amazing.
Tyler: Oh, no! *screams* Mark: This is the human vagina, also known as the Earth. Watch as the ovum is penetrated *thump* over and over and over again. Ovulation has begun when the rotating action engages. Wade: Does that count as laughing if he's sitting there laughing? *end signalled* Bob: Chica. Ethan: *giggling* I stated laughing cause I thought of the... Mark: "Want me to put it in you"?
Ethan: No. Mark: Oh okay.
Tyler: Oh, that was...
Ethan: I thought of... Ethan: So it's me you want? *Ethan and Mark laughing* Mark: Am I up? Mark: Are you unfunny bastards gonna try to make me laugh?
Wade: No.
Tyler: Yeah. *others laughing* *Ethan attempts to play Darude - "Sandstorm"* *Ethan fails miserably* *Ethan continues, with LITTLE success* Wade: Nevermind. Ethan: It's me Ethan: *between laughs* Lord Minion 7 7 7 Wade: *discouraged* Hey, look. It's LordMinion777 from high school when I had fucking hair. Bob: Hey, look. Bob: It's me. Bob: LordMinion777.
*Mark laughing* *everyone laughing* Bob: Thank you for-
*accidentally knocks his own glasses off* Oh, fuck! *more laughter* Mark: Why was that funny? Bob: Thank you for setting that up, everyone else. Mark: It's just like, *mimicking others* Mark: "I'm Lord Minion" Mark: "I'm Lord Minion." Mark: I was just like, what? I just realized the ridiculousness of it. Mark: Three, two, one, start the timer. Mark: *singing* Oh oh OOOHH Oh oh oh! Mark: IIIIIIIIIIIIIII, I'M GAYY! Mark: *devolving* Oh ohhh, I'm gay. Mark: III'm Ethan: *between laughs - also between Bob's legs* What is up my Cranky Crew? Mark: This is another hilarious reference to something you did in the past. Ethan: Marching band. Wade: Screwed a possum?
Ethan: You're a... Royal Guard? Ethan: You were? Part of the Royal Guard? *Bob laughing* Mark: You just... you just (incoherent) you're out there by yourself? Tyler: Oh, it's wet! *Wade laughing*
Tyler: It's wet! Wade: What are you- Really? Staples button: "That was easy." "That was easy." *end signalling* Aww, man. Ethan: It was the pièce de résistance. Mark: Ready? Tyler: Mhm. Mark: Can you tell the difference between these two creatures? Ethan: Excuse me. I'd like to sing a sooong. Everyone but Tyler: I am special. I AM SPECIAL! Mark: AHH, my girthy COCK! OWW! *Mark sighs* Mark: Remember the simpler times where everyone just made fun of your mom? Bob: Change. *Wade chokes* *everyone dies laughing* Wade: That combo. That was a good one-two punch. Mark: Yesss Ethan: Get ready to make me laugh, boys. Wade: Was it you before Mark? Bob: Let's go in front of him Bob: and you draw a caricature of Ethan.
Mark: Okay. Bob: Yeah.
Mark: Okay. Bob: Longer. Mark: Wait, Ethan, look at me.
Button: "That was easy." Bob: Longer.
Mark: Longer.
Bob: Yeah. Bob: Girthy-er.
Mark: Oh, okay. Bob: Can you draw him saying, "what's up my craaaazy crew?" Tyler: "What's up my Craaaanky Crew?" Mark: Tell me if this looks like you.
[*drawing of the word GAY*] Tyler: I got you this gift, Mark cause I remember way back in wrestling... Bob: How Mark has always wanted a penis? Tyler: No. Tyler: With that tiiiny dick. Bob: Do you think that will fit in your tight pants? Mark: You wanna take a picture with me? Ethan: Mmhm. Bob: Fans love that.
Mark: Will you post it on Instagram? Ethan: Mhm. *Ethan starts laughing* *Bob laughing*
Wade: What just happened? Wade: Did somebody fart? Bob: Was it Ethan that farted? Wade: He made, he made himself laugh. Bob: Would someone fart? Wade: Oh, he spat! Tyler: He's out. It came out.
Wade: It leaked. Tyler: It came out.
Wade: He leaked. Bob: Wait, wait, wait. Mark: Something else came out too. Wade: Oh my God, Bob! Wade: Did you have to do it on me!? Bob: Yeah, it's funnier if it's on Wade.
Wade: Gross! Mark: Are you crying? Bob: I'm not allowed to touch Ethan.
Wade: He already spat! Wade: It already came out.
Tyler: Yeah, he really did. It had some projectile to it. Mark: Hey, it's okay.
Wade: It smells so bad. *Bob laughing* Tyler: I thought Chica farted. Mark: You're doing great.
*end signaled* Tyler: Judge, did he spit?
Wade: Awww Bob: It's me. LordMinion777. *clicks scissors* Change. It's me. Markiplier. *clicks* Change. *Wade chuckles* Bob: What's up my CRAAAAAZY BOOOOYSSSSSS!? Wade: *through laughter* Whaat? *Mark breaks* *everyone laughing* Ethan: "What's up my craazy booys?" Mark: You guys don't even need to play, it's just Bob. Ethan: I love the click-click "Change". *laughter* Ethan: I have severe acne and there's nothing that I can do about it. It's my body and I can't help it. I take medication but it doesn't go away. Mark: I'm tired of your acne. Just fuck me. Please. Mark: Just-
Tyler: I'm Markiplier. Tyler: I've got dick on the mind. *end signaled* That sucked. It's official, we're not funny. Amy: Three, two, one, gooo. *Mark plays kazoo* Mark: You don't like Trump. *continues kazoo* Wade: Oh God, that tickles. You're pushing them, it tickles. Stop. Wade: *laughing* It tickles! *Bob laughing* Wade: I can't! Wade: No, stop it! Bob: Wade, come here. It's okay. Come closer, Wade. Wade: *giggling* I'm sorry, Bob.
Bob: No, no, come here. Wade: Ow, my tooth!
Bob: Put your arms down. Wade *giggling and freaking out* You hit me in the tooth!
Bob: Just put your arms down. It's okay, it's okay. Wade: No, no, please.
Bob: Shh, shh, stop it's okay. Shhh Wade: His eyes are watering!
Bob: It's okay. Bob: Okay, bend over. *end signaled* Ethan: Change.
Wade: Oh God! *Wade gasping for air* Bob: You fucking robot! Ethan: They call me Good Ol' Scrote Eyes.
Tyler: Such a beautiful-
*Mark groans* Tyler: Right in that Earth. Ethan: Wow, I'm seeing the future.
Mark: Oh, geez. Earth. Bob: *out of breath* It's me. Markiplier. *Wade and Mark laughing* Bob: Change! Markiplier: It's me! Mark: *giggling* Markiplier.
Tyler: It's me, Crank Gameplays. Mark: Give me more subscribers.
Tyler: Change. Bob: Woo-hu!
Mark: Wade. Mark: Please. Tyler: It's me. Tyler: Ethan.
Mark: Wade, let's- Mark: Wade, let's- *starts laughing*
Ethan: When I sway... *Wade spits all over Mark*
Ethan: When I sway back and forth.
*everyone laughing* Wade: *dying* I just spat on your dick! Mark: Yep, you sure did. And my tits. Wade: I held it together for so long and then just him like spreading and smiling, just b - the dodge ball right to your dick. *laughing* Mark: I'm Markiplier. I raise hundreds of thousands of dollars for charity. *Tyler laughing*
Mark: You wanna do a charity stream? *sexily* Tell me you like to do charity. Wade: Hey, Crazy Cranks. I'm Grandma. Wade: My boobs fell a little low this year. Tyler: He did videos with his grandma. Wade: I'm your grandma. Wade: My boobs are a little lower this year.
Bob: Wade, can I get a... *others laughing*
Tyler: Don't even-! Ethan: *laughing* "I'm your grandma. Boobs are a little lower this year." Mark: *voicing Chica* Many people, long ago decided that we as a society must- Mark: Really
Ethan: What is up my Cranky Crew? Ethan: Ahh, fuck. Wade: Hi, the carpet does match the drapes. *others laughing* Mark: The carpet does match the drapes. *thwock*
*giggling* Tyler: I'm the King Cock. *end signaled* Mark: Alright, ready? Everybody ready? Amy: Three, two, one, go. Mark: I'm All-Star Quarterback, Tom Brady. (Eagles fan) Bob: Alright, it's important that I hold both of these- *Mark giggling* Ethan: What's up, Bobbleheads? Bob: Would you back up, Wade? Mark: Yeah Wade. Wade, get out of here.
Bob: Hang on. *Bob gasps and releases breasts* *everyone laughs* Bob: What's up my craazy kids?
(RIP Tyler) *everyone laughing* Mark: You wanna be up, Amy? Amy: You're sure you want me to be up? Mark: You wanna be up?
Ethan: Do you wanna go? Amy: I mean I will but it... Mark: Come on. Bob: Are we going?
Mark: Yeah.
Tyler: I already started it.
Mark: Hit, hit, oh. Mark: We start- oh.
Bob: Okay. Bob: Alright, Mark and I have a thing. Alrighty, Mark. Let's do a simulation of YouTube. Mark: Yeah.
Bob: Okay Bob: This is a handful of attention. I'm a viewer. *giving Mark some attention* hh-hhnn--hyeh! *more attention* chh-d-blhhh!
*Mark giggling* Bob: Happy Wheels video? *full load of attention* CCHH-DE-DEH-BLAAUGH! *Mark laughing* Bob: Ooohhh, I'm good for like two weeks. Mark: It's me. Crank Gameplays. Ethan: Why do we keep using the same joke about me!?
*Tyler blows kazoo* Wade: That's Chica, that's Mark. *Amy breaks* Ethan: Oh my God.
*everyone laughing* (Please send help) Mark: You okay? Amy: It's up my nose!
Mark: Oh, no! Wade: Is this the "7 Second Challenge" or the "Don't Laugh"?
"Mark laughs* Mark: We gotta make Bob laugh!
Amy: I- Mark: We have to!
Amy: I'm good.
Mark: We have to. Wade: I'm your old college roommate. Wade: These are wrist braces 'cause Warcraft ruined my life. Mark: Oh, that's just sad. Ethan: Change.
*pelts Mark with a dodgeball* Mark: Owww! Wade: God! *laughs*
Mark: Fucking hell! Mark: I'm combing the comedy out. Mark: Fuck. Laugh. Please! I'm desperate! Ethan: Change! *whap!*
Tyler: *collapsing* O-off! *Mark laughing*
Wade: My God! Wade: I don't like this! Ethan: Change! *pelt!* Mark: Oh, fuck! Ethan: I got him. \o/
*everyone laughs* Bob: Jesus Christ, what's wrong with you!? *all laugh* Mark: So that was the "Don't Laugh Challenge" with Bob, Wade, Tyler, Ethan, and myself. Ethan: Amy.
Mark: Amy was also here. Mark: Hi, Amy.
Amy: Hi. Ethan: And Chica, Chica was also...
Mark: And Chica was also a part of this Tyler: She ran away, where'd she go? Bob: She's fucking out. *Mark sighs*
Wade: Here's all that remains of Chica. Mark: These, these are always a time and a testament to the limits with which you will test friendship and a realization of how hollow and empty we actually are as people. So thanks for not laughing with us. And as always, we'll see you in the next video. Mark: Buh-bye!
Others: Bye!
