Don Rickles & Betty on David Letterman (2010)

right [Music] it's the main point [Music] [Applause] the years of my and then CBS Orchestra [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] hey I don't know why I do that welcome to the show you folks alright everybody okay you feeling good are you like me you feel good you look good yep you work hard you play hard right you know what day is happening this weekend it happens every year we can York Fleet Week OH anybody here participating in Fleet Week [Applause] but it's when American men and women the Navy Coast Guard says sailors Marines everybody comes to New York and they leave their vessel in the harbor and they have a big time and it's like a like Mardi Gras really but it's for armed services and it's a wonderful thing but you know it's a little depressing because New York City is still one of those towns and it's not Leamington Ontario [Applause] [Music] [Applause] obscure Canadian towns for a hundred Alex yeah say you're a sailor and you okay in town on Fleet Week and you go to dinner and you come out in your submarines been stolen you know what that's you know what I'm saying that earlier today I saw a couple of sailors in the what a coincidence they bumped into former mayor Eliot Spitzer really yeah and they were asking him if he knew where they could find girls ah [Applause] [Music] ha did you notice it's hot the weather is already creeping up is going to be a very hot summer I fear very hot today I walking on Fifth Avenue past st. Patrick's I saw a couple of nuns sitting out front on the porch rolling cold cans of butter on their neck [Applause] summer is just around the corner here is a sure sign that a summer today that's a true story my hand to God on this one the UPS guy asked me to put sunblock on his legs true story [Applause] here's how here's how nice and summery it was today this happened done at West Side Story anybody see the West Side Story instead of rumbling the Sharks and the Jets were barbecuing at they weren't rumbling [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] well Memorial Day weekend is ahead I know it's only Wednesday but you want to get a jump on being stuck at the airport for 24 hours I mean you really look forward to that eight hours on the runway leave them through Delta's SkyMall magazine [Music] it's Memorial Day though and you know it's the day that we honor uh military heroes with a mattress blowout sale at sleepies that's not that's not right [Applause] [Music] a lot of barbecues this weekend you have ittle barbecue anybody here have it already that's great because those ice caps just aren't melting fast enough ah I always here's what I like to do I put a like a five minute on and I'm no Emeril Lagasse who well whatever I'm barbecuing here you take out your steak and you put it on the grill and sear it on each side for about five minutes and that that brings out that carcinogens that's that's exactly where your we got the big barbecue weekend in my house this weekend and it's not gonna be easy the family got together and we have to tell mom she's not coming to the picnic because we're replacing her believe me she's not going to take that easy but here here's who were taking her place [Applause] I don't know if you've if you've been at a picnic or a barbecue where and everybody's in a good frame went and then something goes haywire and because something always can the potential for danger is always there at a barbecue because you've got people probably a drunk you've got the hot coals and and you've got the blazing the Sun and you get people uh you're overeating well last year I always try to keep an eye on my Uncle Earl because he's like my money he's my guy and I kept looking at him and I thought he's offended look at him and I noticed that he's drinking out of a flask and I thought well alright I'll you know I'll give him that one well then later it turns out it was not a flask he was drinking the charcoal later [Applause] [Music] by the way many of these jokes are told annually who tonight season finale of American Idol [Music] [Applause] what do you folks in another time zone I mean honestly I thought I had gone deaf there for a minute now well and it was a special show guess who showed up Paula Abdul ah [Music] she was not supposed to be there she just wandered it [Music] [Applause] I know a lot of you folks are only here because you couldn't get in to see Sex in the City - am i right I mean the thing opens at the midnight tonight and the two hours of the aging actresses shopping for shoes and I when I heard that I say hey cut me a slice of that I'm gonna be there [Music] and in this one Aidan is back right and if you know what that means there's a good chance you're gay that's right [Music] [Applause] but what a storybook ending to Sex in the City - at the end Samantha becomes the next mrs. Larry King how about that Gulf of Mexico you all remember the Gulf of Mexico it's the Gulf of parking you need a 10 Park now they have endless unlimited parking for the old Gulf Coast huh and British Petroleum you know it's somehow they're gonna make money on this they are already figuring out a way to make money on this a they they're losing millions and billions and billions of dollars a day on this oil leak they're ruining the environment killing off the wildlife but yet they found a way to make money on the big oil spill are you aware of this no no here watch watch ready to fire up the grill this summer say goodbye to boring old charcoal briquettes and switch to new BP tar balls freshly harvested from the Gulf of Mexico BP tar balls toxic hydrocarbons and volatile chemical compounds make any grilled meat spill delicious try BP tar balls and turn your next barbecue into a tar vaq you [Music] [Applause] you are folks familiar with the Justin Bieber yes he popular young star and he's just a kid he's like a 11 I don't know runner been on the show a very personable very likable young fellow and wherever he goes of people go crazy the young girls just can't get enough of Justin Bieber well we have a brand new segment tonight to kind of kick off the holidays and the name of this segment is called Justin Bieber ouch really Justin Bieber house Justin Bieber Oh Justin Bieber out all right take a look [Music] let's go to mothers hope [Applause] coming up time to go and Piedmont bird colors remember son flocks not only good for your skin it's delicious on chicken stick around Duke for for 45 years the community of Piedmont California has had an annual high school bird calling competition and typically each year we will have the winners representative of that competition here on the program that's what we're gonna do tonight I think you'll find it enjoyable so do me a favor please welcome third-place finishers finishers Catherine Harley and a críticos and Sara Siskind girls come on out please and you are Sara come on all the way over here kids [Applause] thank you very much for being with us tonight I knew you all go to the same high school is that correct yeah and is a Piedmont high is that where this yeah what what year are you guys in we're all seniors seniors and they're looking forward to going on to college next fall yeah where will you be going I'm going to University of Colorado at Boulder it's very nice there how about yourself University of California at Davis well Davis it's AB it's a big veterinary medicine school are you gonna study to be a veterinarian I think managerial economics will be the option and you I'm excited to be going to be going to Tufts in the fall Oh Tufts up there in the Boston area well good for you well that sounds like a lot of fun first year in the competition yes and everybody first year third year okay so you're a seasoned veteran and and what is the what is the what is the impetus to sign up for the competition is it just a love of Ornithology usually there's an announcement and it's like free pizza bird calling and kids go free pizza and you free pizza I I indulge in pizza [Music] and you peaches well okay so you guys were the third-place finishers what did you what did you win this trip [Music] okay and the bird tonight is what northern Gannet the northern Gannet I've never heard of that Jian GA an OTT GA and the there it is right there okay and what can you tell us about the bird sixty-eight percent of the species live in the British Isles so so you take it from there and what does it eat generally it's small fish earrings any pelagic species a it's a sea bird then yeah it's a diver it looked a little like what we think of as a sea gull and are a plumber something like that in that family okay and and how do you research the call that it makes um there's actually a lot of websites that have bird calls and you just listen to it do it over and over again and we met with our biology teacher and he helped us as well free pizza all right Catherine Harley Anna críticos and Sarah sis can take it away kids third place winners ladies gentlemen northern Gannet here we go [Applause] we're looking tough thank you so much [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] I mean it's a wonder the place isn't full of northern Gannet took three took three today that yeah next Angelica Kong Devon Duffy and Tom Eric Hagen ladies gentlemen come on up [Applause] Angelica nice to see you devyn let me see you Tom Eric how nice to see you and you kids are all juniors same high school the competition is held at the high school there Piedmont high is that correct yes first year in the competition yeah all three of us and what was the motivating factor here other than the free pizza we just wanted to make some memories make some memories [Music] and believe me these are the memories that will last a lifetime [Music] [Applause] and you any thoughts reflecting now on the competition why you're in it and what have you learned I don't know just an excuse to dress up like a bird and act do what I do okay sure yeah I just wanted to make a fool of myself on national television [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] well I do that every night and I've made a pretty good living alright the the bird of choice tonight is the tundra flan Tundra Swan I don't know this but it sounds like it might be endangered is it endangered not at all not at all alright where do we find the Tundra Swan the Tundra but northern northern latitudes more up in the frozen tundra it's over all of North America North America so this is the Swan that we see and and I've always been told that the Swans a mate for life is that correct yeah Rose you know yeah okay now I would think that this I've actually heard a swan say it's kind of a honking isn't it as a little bit of a honking yeah sort of yeah okay you know you're the experts okay Angelica Kong Devin Duffy and Tom Eric Hagen and second place winners with the Tundra Swan take it away kids [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] thank you very much [Music] are you thinking to yourselves and sounded a little like the northern Gannet [Music] put a couple extra guys on the doors I don't want the swans in here now either all right ladies and gentlemen here we have your first place competitors say hello to Andrew Morehead Emma Nichols and Zachary Heiser come on out [Applause] Zachary come on over here kids you're all seniors what are you gonna do after high school um I don't know I'm a junior [Music] [Applause] what are you gonna do for the summer I'm going to an acting camp in Santa Cruz okay I'm going backpacking in Europe oh man well good luck and be careful over there were you going to school you told us already you're going to UC Berkeley's all right yeah I knew sir I'm gonna be performing in two shows hairspray and painter rockin wagon at our local community theater but you know paint your rocket that would be a great show nothing wrong with that I get to work on that immediately ain't your rocket okay man all right settle down everyone please now what is the bird we're hearing tonight the red-billed chopped I've never I never heard of a red-billed chaw but what can you tell us about the bird it's a bit like a crow with a red beak um it's a non migratory bird names where then in Ireland Ireland and other parts of North Africa so but we don't don't have them here in North America yeah okay Irish and why did you select the Irish red-billed chaw well uh it's some a fun bird you know practical call you just really spoke castaways and when you say fun bird [Music] [Laughter] okay Andrew Moorhead Emma Nichols and Zachary Peyser it's the Irish red-billed chocolated gentleman here we go [Applause] [Music] typically [Music] if you know anything about me at all you know that I consider you all to be winners so let's finish up now with a collective group call here they are ladies gentlemen your bird Piedmont bird call competition winners for 2010 take it away kids [Applause] [Music] all right here we go our next guest is a good friend of ours and a comedy legend he'll be performing at the Orleans Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas on June 5th and 6th Eirias mr. warmth himself Don Rickles [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] Ricki Thanks I mean if I'm like they never like that poor get rid of me fifty-one years Don Rickles has been a headliner 51 years a headliner in Las Vegas Nevada nobody nobody and nobody comes close to that well thanks there by the way it's great to see you again even you don't look good ah but uh no you look terrific okay well we're getting older too and I get older too but I feel great Don let me ask you a question if there were no Las Vegas where would a guy like you have had such a great career on a sanitation truck [Laughter] [Applause] what was the old Las Vegas like when you started out well you know you had to do good cuz everybody had a gun that's true the owners used to sit in another Jew crack and I'm gonna put a bullet in his head know that you know there were wise guys but they were great they were you know if you weren't funny and you know your home burned right but how did you ever have any trouble that anybody could take you aside and say hey knock off to this or knock off the no Sinatra as my bodyguard Oh Frank was pivotal in your career wasn't it you kid yeah he woke up in the morning went the summer wind does Rickles alive anyway no Frank let's bet I could say a lot about him courses yeah anyway but now take us back taketake to how long you have that [Applause] your work with those birds and I like that first group wouldn't kid kids do on the college can you see one of them be President someday well they were cute kids didn't you think they were cute yeah they were all right yeah now you know what adorable they'd be your buddy Johnny Carson used to have them on his show all the time so what do want me to drop my paints a fire a rocket [Music] [Applause] in-out Don Rickles dropping his pants and firing a rocket here we got David stand by got ready firing a rocket about you say something yeah going down down memory lane now tell us who was in the original Rat Pack me were you a Rat Pack guy no I was the guy that stood outside the steam room saying pass me my pants anyway don't have a steam room and Frank's big joke was to throw me out in the nude by the cabanas and all of your jewels in a beach chairs we go yeah because you know the Irish you guys went but did you an apartment but you leave anybody that much no I was going to say the blacks but that would be okay no but anyway but you drank pretty good in those days those guys drank pretty good yeah I drank vodka pretty good yeah I used to got a girl I never get excited except the leg kept going up anyway but what does that mean the leg kept going up there on the air but it means the bird got excited I think I gotta write that down yeah it means that he's the bird got excited ladies gentlemen if you're just tuning in now listen tell us a little bit it was you and the Sammy your good friend Sammy Davis jr. yeah Frank of course Dean Martin well now you know what they advertise all the time are these a Dean Martin roast oh they look and and you're featured in them tell us a little thanks some flavor though you know what David the truth of it is there was such a and folks every time I every time I'm here I look out and I I kept that thing I'm going blind because you people on television don't know it so it's all black in there either that or I got cataracts but don't you but no but what happened the class of the group you know people like orson welles you know restless soul jack benny you know Dean Martin of course we've gotta go yeah there was so many great people Ronald Reagan Ronald Reagan was was great I read I kidded him when he was the governor and I did the roast is what guy went yeah you know he's making pancakes these are little so I understand thank you they just to keep me going because you're no help I know but then it was a Brett garrison who produced the roast rat garrison rest his soul here he was great and you know how he did that day and ladies yumin Heat he always said everybody had for something written I was kind of proud of this and every time I I did the show he said Rickles does whatever he wants I trust him let him just do his thing right and I never had anything written for me and I just winged it right off the top of my head and one thing I always remember is Frank Sinatra always used to sit when I was the hostess but he'd sit next to me and eat smoke and the smoke was coming up and say what the hell is this London anyway Frank laughs how do you not I would have been on the jelly with Jerry Lewis telethon yeah but it was good fun but he ever do you ever watched some of those tapes now because they there's some like you said tremendous talent represent I do but every time I do the wife wants to drive out to the cemetery anyway so many of them are gone rest their souls you know that so many greats I'm still here because God said keep it going right yeah anyway I'm for you [Applause] [Music] on Ricky 51 years in Las Vegas and so you've seen it all you've seen it go from the humble beginnings not so humble really but its beginnings to now it's just like a corporate amusement well it's right when how I used came in you know he came out of the closet and made this a fantastic yeah no I don't mean he was gay of being gays nothing wrong with that he just lived in a closet he was peak no he did he would have Shrike yeah he would take a shower without the water he was a recluse cause he was weird I hate that show the cards so this crime show the film show the film anyway [Applause] anyway those days we all used to hang out together the cocktail waitress you were single in those days I was in heat yeah anyway I can hardly wait till the show to be over to get this going again yeah [Applause] if you're laughing that jokes gonna cost me I'm married 45 years and when I get back to the hotel she couldn't say let's hear that thing about the leg again and this time makes me laugh [Applause] but it was working late doing shows running around different canal we were lonely day via the the cocktail waitresses today god bless today they got families and kids and they got a lot of obligations in those days when the first thought out there's only three or four hotels and we were all only and want them to be together we've got the Lake Mead believe it or not like water-skied Oh book an alibi I just sit in the chair go I'm up anyway but but it was fun it was great fun and you and you met girls and I was I was a late bloomer I was 38 before I got married I just this sit in the tub and make it bubble anyway [Applause] No anyway so Frank Frank fixed me up in the swim girl oh I never got Margie anyone she said Don I got this girl for you she's perfect and she was blonde kind of cute glasses you know and a little space like you little space in the little space on the front teeth between her front teeth yeah and and every time and every time we made love she started a whistle I didn't know if I stuff to remain t [Music] [Applause] all right now when we come back I had a little bit of a bone to pick with you if that's all right you could pick my bone we'll be right back with Don Rickles ladies [Applause] [Applause] tomorrow is Dave welcome to Robert Downey jr. and okay go spit out the gum right now [Music] we'll be right back [Applause] what is it done [Music] are usually the only comedian that headlines in Las Vegas these days are there other comics alone on it Jerry Seinfeld why sure Jerry is it the life yeah and a funny guy there I don't want Bob Newhart of course my other friend and there are many you know I'll leave out too many people that I think of funny but it's changes and I mean everything's different now that when that the tiger got loose and killed everyone [Laughter] what's what's wrong with you [Applause] [Music] oh by the way I just got to get this in Paul Shaffer yeah the cameraman get out of the way sir yeah mr. miles I just came back from a tour of Canada and everything's great everybody and there's one Mountie still sitting on a horse Gong mmm where's Jeanette MacDonald right your kids don't remember those days Nelson Eddy and Jeanette the ground you know the Mounties you know and I was in Canada I had a wonderful time I had a leak in my canoe and how to leave early oh that's good leave that in hey ho ho ho too bad you're not taller by now anyway Don is the voice of mr. Potatohead in Toy Story 3 when will that be opening up in theaters June 18th that's a big deal Don can you've been into the previous two right here in 14 years ago am i you're great my kids they love that yeah they love pop Pop's mr. potato you know they're cute kids they're gonna come into a lot of money if I let him yeah sure let's show them a clip Don this is you as mr. Potato Head in Toy Story 3 let's take a look here [Music] you would not believe what I've been through tonight you're fresh healthy it's terrible you've lost weight and so drawl ah you're a sight for detachable eyes [Music] closed 23 I was watching the the Craig Ferguson show one night at the shows it right on after this one yeah and and they say the special guest our Don Rickles and I think well great I mean I I'm excited and wounded at the same time because I thought what why it would Don be going on another show you know what I thought I'll be honest with you in there you are and he's sucking up to you and I'm thinking and you're talking about Oh Barbara loves you and you come out to the house I see has he really been to the house you talking about Craig Ferguson has he really been out to your house no okay but you'd like you all go to dinner and his wife and my wife and herself I don't know Pete Alice Sally is a dear friend of mine right do sit over there and why did you bring up Craig Ferguson all because I had this bone to pick because I'm sitting at home alone watching TV thinking to other shows I didn't know that I it was a week it's a show this show is this the time killer and you help me with the hotel room when I'm staying at the Hollywood in oh but now I use a bill I'm not through yet Dave you brought it up yeah yeah I mean if you said to be done you're gonna be the co-host with me you'll get my money we'll be together all the time I wouldn't make us think about it how did you brought it up I certainly need all the shows [Applause] [Music] I thought I was your buddy I thought I was the guy well I guess you'll fit into three or four times but I must say the one man you know he's alone oh and when the show's over puts on his baseball cap gets into his underwear and hides under a bus but anyway that's true exactly right nothing wrong but he gave me a wonderful party years ago at 21 he did he really did and invited all his cast and crew and I thought that was so great and Regis Philbin to this day has tried to commit suicide over that four or five times because we just want them to be invited he's not big enough know anyway so he's not he's not big enough he's not thinking of it and the other thing you know Regis had surgery they had they they really ought to remove the clot in his wallop has he ever picked up a check [Applause] I'm deaf no we I've had three dinners with you each one memorable and I hope we have many many more please god I hope so to it you know Dave really now that I'm on the show again every time I come back I'm I'm very inspired and things have gone well for me and I owe a lot to you for being so kind to me and my my family and we have a big home now with hunting dogs [Laughter] really Johnny went away and I thought Carson was too so I thought it'd be the end for me and then you came along with that booming personality made it so nice I love ya well I love you too I think the world of you the one the only Don Rickles ladies [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Applause] how about that guy that's it that's one-of-a-kind that's it that's all we got left punctum on tremendous enter our next guest is a Grammy award-winning singer-songwriter whose music is the subject of this forthcoming tribute entitled to broken hearts and dirty windows songs of John Prine now please welcome with special guest iam games of My Morning Jacket John Prine [Applause] [Music] [Music] wish user and happiness I guess I wish bears I wish you don't do that guy do ever found someone [Music] because if you just like a deer well around here [Music] the kids don't know yes how hard it is tuition is good [Music] [Music] I guess not it's like Christmas card a tree throw it in here then it decays and dies snowman [Music] new house [Music] nothing me with me got no hay no pride [Music] so much love that I just can't hide yeah so much I just gave high [Music] - I have a Chevy stay a driver say you drive around the town - you just get bored let me change your mind [Music] one else to do [Music] in your heart it's born with your mind and it changes you [Music] - doggone shame I wish you luck I wish you happiness [Music] wish you to the we should have minutes I guess a leash [Music] [Applause] thank you very much Jim good to see you that was beautiful great to have you broken hearts and dirty windows the music of John Prine ladies and gentlemen that's it have a great holiday weekend [Music] [Applause] [Music] good night everybody [Music] try me weed Oh

Channel: The Great Don Rickles

Views: 75,728

Keywords: don rickles and ronald reagan, don rickles andy griffith show, don rickles and frank sinatra, don rickles bob hope, don rickles biography, don rickles best lines, don rickles best, don rickles best jokes, don rickles bob newhart, don rickles clips, don rickles cigarette box, don rickles carson, don rickles comedy, don rickles comedian, don rickles eastwood, don rickles early yearsd, on rickles funniest moments, don rickles frank sinatra, don rickles greatest hits

Id: eHgOPgFYKEw

Length: 43min 31sec (2611 seconds)

Published: Tue Jul 31 2018