DEFCON 19: The Art of Trolling (w speaker)

Video Statistics and Information

Video

Captions Word Cloud

Captions

as I said in my biography this talk is dedicated to two heroes that we've lost recently Ronald Reagan and Macho Man Randy Savage I'd like to add a special note also for Bubba who recently died of Police Academy Fame good guy so I didn't have time to Photoshop men also I've never seen him in a cowboy hat but what I'd like everyone in the audience to do to demonstrate your love of these great American icons is well I'm going to shout America and I want you all to shout fuck yeah so America nicely done okay get this going yeah so welcome to the art of trolling I submitted this talk actually as a joke I did not expect it to be accepted I've submitted yeah so I like many of you have probably submitted many great talks to DEFCON that have been technical and brilliant and insidious and many nature's and they get turned down every time the one time I submit a talk that's you know kind of stupid it gets accepted so goes to show okay can you still hear me I've got one of these that's probably the feedback is so okay raise your hand if you can't hear me okay so I'm Matt Joyce I'm also known as open fly I am someone who's actually trolled people before sadly and this next slide is important so trolling is innately going to piss some people off hopefully none of you are going to get pissed off at me and for the duration of the talk try to suspend your hatred and whether or not what I'm talking about is ethical or not it's irrelevant it's more about the technology the mythology and the lulz which is important so we're going to move on the troll we need to agree on a definition of what a troll is a lot of different definitions of troll have been bandied about across the years and with things like LulzSec and so on and Anonymous running around a lot of different people are trying to fuck with what the word troll means and it's become oh my god I'm going to go protest people killing the whales that's a troll it's not so we're going to go with a couple of these really bad definitions are kind of great the one that really is the best is one of the very bottom on the cyberbullying laws definition I love that makes the assumption that everyone is generally helpful that gets trolled and they're emotionally distraught as a result of it so it's actually kind of like that definition I troll them but uh here's my definition I came up with this and I think it's pretty much one of the better troll definitions out there it does involve a thirty year old single Scotch if you don't drink you should start if it's against your reer religion or morality you know you can't be a troll sorry son Zuko quotes I'd like to see more of them in conferences because I know pisses off attrition org so if you do submit or present here son zoo quotes throughout all of it don't even have to actually be quotes just tag them okay so before we get into like modern-day trolling let's go back in time to the prehistory when the world was young and people were discovering that trolls not only carried big things and hung under bridges they also you know piss people off so God is not a troll in judeo-christianity God a lot of people were telling me this guy's a troll he's not this is proof this is Bethel bunch of kids made a joke about one of his his prophets and he summoned bears that's not funny that's just dick but God had a son Jesus is a troll he walked around in the Middle East preaching everyone being friends with each other the last guy to do that was george w bush o loki kind of a badass but a lot of people don't know that his best friend was a long wolf which was kind of important and of course he know loki needs no introduction everyone knows him but prometheus a lot of people don't know the full story about how much patrol this guy was he was fucking dedicated so how everyone knows about him stealing fire but does anyone know like the real story behind why he stole in the fire it all started as a practical joke Homeslice was like okay Zeus is at a banquet with all the other gods and a couple Titans they're hanging out they're going to decide what Zeus is going to get as an offering from the people of Earth so Prometheus being the asshole that he is basically dresses up bones inside of like pig fat and makes it look really good then he dresses up meat inside of like the bowels of swine you know if you're Scottish that might appeal to you but Zeus was obviously not happy so Zeus picks the bones he ends up with bones being dedicated to him by the people of earth and being the asshole that Zeus is he goes okay well if I can't get my meat no one else can either in steals fire from people Prometheus not about to let his joke die steals fire back to people being the biggest asshole and I guess whatever Greek mythology that's a good one so for that for his crime he ended up being chained to a rock and had you know Eagles ripping out his flesh and then growing back every day which severe dedication good guy then there's the coyote the coyote is probably the most positive figure of a troll in the history of Native American lore he teaches many good and wonderful lessons he's kind of great a lot of people think another good one would be like the African guy a Nancy a Nancy was not that cool uh Nancy basically stole everything good he ever did from other animals all of his stories he basically jacked the speedran sane of four one nine scammers okay this guy is a modern-day icon so stabby here was inadvertently part of a troll we picked him up as an orphan robot at resistor some guy walks in and says hey does anyone want a robot arm and you know you never say no to that ever so anyways stabbed he's hanging out with us where you going to the TechCrunch hack day where there's a whole bunch of web entrepreneurs doing their hackathons doing their startup businesses including the AOL team which by the way failed it hard we brought in a giant systematic arm connected to a blade and we hooked it up with Twilio set it up so that people could contact the stabbing arm via the phone choose the mode of stabbing and then we had a little stab our ID it connected to it to fired it up we thought this was hilarious it turns out so did everyone else at the TechCrunch we ended up like coming in like 14th place of three but we were still invited to the the row of like winners of like the three people who won and they made us an honorary runner-up just so that they could get us into the row of people that were actually presenting real business models at times so people would be coming down the aisle and going yeah yeah what's this it stabbed people you guys are trying to sell this so now we're going to get back to classical trolling a lot of people people may know some of this stuff the big ones are logical fallacies these are how you talk to someone you know piss someone off through conversation this is the one most people encounter it's also the one that most people are unprepared to deal with because our American educational system has glossed over the fact that our brains basically have fundamental flaws in them it's real easy to make someone say something stupid or believe something utterly insane so I've basically taken the highlights comic books here and reworded them to to illustrate so appeal to Authority is a great one I personally like to choose an authority no one else recognizes which I've kind of illustrated in the top one where some guys taking advice from his dad who's boring are introduced on the markets of the Orient obviously he does not have a monocle or a top hat so he knows nothing of the markets of the Orient but you know he's an authority figure move on over here we got the appeal to probability what are the odds and this one is actually kind of useful especially when dealing people in academia who rely upon probability you know simplest answer is likely the most likely yeah the best part about this is people have presumption of what the actual odds are so sometimes you can actually convince something is untrue when it's actually true because the actual odds are not understood denying the antecedent is kind of great just because this is wrong doesn't mean this is right you know great ways of talking with people but note the the top one that one's important 911 trolling is some of the best out there it the now the great part is is everyone's covered the obvious stuff now it's you know these rallies did it the CIA did it it's important to like take a positive spin on this and go at it from another angle and be like our heroic CIA agents were killed in a botched attempt to blow up the towers by terrorists who actually struck on the same go for gopher insane arcane and you can have a lot of fun with this one and no matter what you do you're going to piss people off denying they have to see that here is crucial so the argument from ignorance basically on this one evolution creationism arguments are basically founded about them and those are also great one reason its grades because there's dinosaurs involved and everyone loves dinosaurs so we got the Raptor Jesus people running around on top of Triceratops it's pretty great arguments migrants are really easy to do and they problem with them is is you can't use them on audience like you guys you guys actually have a fairly decent breadth of knowledge where you're going to sit there and go this doesn't work but if you're ever like at Bible study and you want to fuck with people this works so this is um Adolf and Hans discussing a correlative policies while I was doing these I got progressively worse and at some point they switched over from being Connor and Mark to Adolf and Hobbes so correlative ballast e's are the best on earth in fact correlative fallacies are so badass that doctoral thesis people will actually get into real serious pissing matches over whether or not they're correlative analysis is actually correct and you can take this to every level so you can argue over like percentage error in a test three layers below someone else's test you can this is basically how the people argue about whether or not the world is global warming or global cooling you can argue any which way and just prove any argument using correlative analyses and correlative analysis but uh you can also do horrible horrible things with them as shown in the top one okay hold on I will read it aloud for you because somebody asked so the little boy says I wonder why the black guy always dies first in these films to his you know darker skins friend well it's obvious the the reason black dudes always die first in horror movies is because they are genetically inferior to us aryan folk i don't actually believe that in fact my identical twin brother is african-american thank god he's not here right now so historian fallacies are the also great because you can go with some really arcane ridiculously wonderful shape with these so i've done a couple of good ones here they're good i like i like personally prefer the one to the right where the kids insinuating you know they're only 300 of us you say but you know I ask you what Leonidas could do with 300 choosing people out of history and taking them into the wrong era is wonderful because people are taught growing up that these are these are important stories that give us a message of hope and prosperity and so on but obviously many of them are you know they're not the norm these are exceptional people and exceptional times in exceptional circumstances which makes them great did you do the false dilemma ok the false dilemma is a really good one this one actually works on a lot of people and it works in two ways one it can easily get them turn around and the other one is it can interfere 8 them to the point that they lose coherence in their brain they just go it's like idiot mode for fury and you all know an idiot mode is right you start talking with large technical terms and everyone just glaze over believe everything you say I'm sure most of the InfoSec people in here know all about that there are entire business models based on it yeah I said it okay so we'll move on from there the young Republican with the if by whiskey I just love the namely if by whiskey uh it's it's kind of a way to compliment someone while calling them an asshole and you know it's the ultimate high form of policy it's yes I agree with you it's wonderful that you that you support stopping the slaughter of whales but you know whales are godless killing machines something's out of fact maybe a little bit better I came without that up the top of the head moving on behavior modification so I did a little bit of research on this because behavior modification is one of those things a lot of research has been done on a lot of it was done in the 50s and it was done by people who are attempting to stop communists gays fascists anyone you could think of obviously in work so this is the important part for you guys your InfoSec professionals you have to stop viewing people as people view them as software a lot of the same things are true you just look at them as a black box design and you're basically buzzing the ever-loving crap out of the person until you see a response that looks anomalous then you pick out like a scab most of this is basically how most trolling works on any basis it's look fine exploit so this this little bastard right here was the first body ever wrote I was on IRC a lot in college and I needed to go to class yes yeah only college so it goes back that far but I was an IRC a lot in college a lot and I need to go to class so what I did was was I automated myself on our seats that I could continue to call people names and harass people while I wasn't there so this bot basically just sat on there responded to certain people and if it heard its name would make certain responses that I would usually make you but occasionally say things I usually say and no one caught on to it for something like three or four weeks and the only reason they did catch it because it was responding just a little too quickly so this is a great hilarious but B also made me feel like I'm a bad tool so actual modification of human behavior involves changing people surroundings so these are the Martin and pair seven characteristics I pulled off Wikipedia and they are actual behavior modification guidelines if you will so what I've done with these is I've modified them to meet my needs and call them the seven characteristics of behavior modification for the most part they're important but one of them relies a lot on accountability and responsibility and being ethical this one doesn't exactly the opposite zero accountability is absolutely vital the fact that I'm caught talking to you is only happening because I don't do as much horrible crap as I used to do one of the guys in the front row here actually chased me down the hallway the first time I met him when he found out that I was the guy from IRC so this you got to be careful doing this you know lots of proxies LulzSec the shit out of yourself but my second version of the bot kind of made fun of that it uh it basically worked off of IRC logs and it generated a whole bunch of separate bots that would live off of an IRC log it would see a new character enter enter into a channel based off of that character's enter time and repeat the text that it said at that time there was multiple different ways to uses the primary one is you could take a very busy channel record the traffic and replay it into a channel that you didn't like flood the hell out of it no one would realize it was being flooded because they'd see different people having real conversations not realizing they're all BOTS so when I was demoing this for the people at Noisebridge I pre demoed it on a German IRC server using a an IRC log based off of the hackers movie script so it rejoined all the characters in time with the movie and had them talk to each other as such I was interesting I have two versions of that but one of my website is actually for using what's that stupid site called free note is it now not free no to tour that's the one yeah sorry about that the reason all the tour nodes don't work on things like IRC or forums is people like me it was too easy we used them all then we went back to proxies which are a bitch to find unless of course you're one of those horrible people who you know steals them so this isn't a very important piece of technology right here 3d scanning and with the help of the MakerBot team at Maker Faire this year I helped them get 3d scans of the moon my moon that's my ass it's on Thingiverse it's open source there's a lot of different technology and trolling and you can use all of it I assure here so this one's kind of my my favorite and most famous I got bored one day and embedded an mp3 player inside of a hand-grenade so this ended up on a whole bunch of blogs fine a couple hit Boing Boing and hackaday which is great but a couple months later the TSA found it on my Flickr feed and blogged about it not once but twice basically my mp3 player personally is never allowed on an airplane now the really great part here and I'll leave it to all of you guys to you know bitch to the TSA about is none of them actually provided attribution and this is a Creative Commons image so we have some fun with that okay so this one's another good one how many people here are familiar with shmoocon goods it's really hard to get tickets luckily one year a friend of mine was there and contacted us the Friday of shmoocon starting I was about to grab a bus down from New York and he goes you're never going to believe this shit these guys have actually made their badges out of plastic and I'm like okay get a dollar bill send us a picture on your cell phone he does we marked up a whole bunch of fake badges and laser-cut all of them this one was massively scaled in bubblegum pink we had another one that was normally scaled bubblegum pink but with a unicorn on it we also made five black badges because that was one of the most common types of plastic we had and we made five of them I didn't realize that black was actually being used when we got there we realized holy crap not he's black being used it's the organiser' badge so as far as I know only one person managed to get into the conference with one of the black badges because I only gave one out before I found out that that wasn't allowed but somebody did get in with the giant bubble gum pink badge which was confiscated and then sold to charity but yeah interestingly enough this is water cut you could pry plasma cut some derivative or just use cardboard in color right and you could probably screw up their game because note how this has numbers and some sort of game involved with it so did theirs we change the barcode to basically say fuck you people were scanning the barcode seeing fuck you and going what how does this work into the game they thought that our badges are like some sort of secret game this one I have to note because DNA is prolific in the world of trolling and I'm sure there's there's members out here I would like to say the time fag is its douche and I'd like to know when death hey bio is going back with nirodha again but uh so troll Forge was something that they set up initially was private and then they went public and then then what private again and then went public again and then somebody stole the tarball and now it's on an EU and I don't know why but troll fortress hilarious because they created their own version of trolling software and I suggest looking at this because it'll give you a great insight into how trolls go about bypassing filters there's this is actual like InfoSec research these guys will actually go after failures in things like CAPTCHA systems and this right here is basically four or five years old but demonstrates the degree of complexity that was involved in bypassing and fucking with people on forums highly capable people doing utterly worthless crabbing then you wonder this is how LulzSec comes around when someone gets very bored yes if you won't want to know mole SEC is actually ran by a name a guy named Dylan VA of the il LAN you can find him on pound lush on risin a lot a lot of people don't know that it's true this one is my favorite I never did this but whoever the hell did this gets hell of a lot of points this is a 4chan troll basically someone called up and convinced Oprah Winfrey that there were over 9000 penises out there raping children and she went on the air thinking that there was a real organization out there that had over 9000 penises all raping children it said it in that exact way I really have no other way to explain that that's just it's astounding okay ethics this is kind of important it's hard to get into so when you first start out this is like hacking it's like playing you can play with your friends that's okay you can play with people that you don't know in environments where you expect people to play with you that's okay like if you're on IRC there's a certain expectation that you're going to be fucked with you when you're on the DEF CON Network there's a certain expectation you're going to be fucked with when you're in a Walmart gets a little gray when you're at your cousin's wedding there are certain things you just don't do you can apply that or you could be more moral about it but the end result is is how you choose to go about playing with things like this is moderately important but the most important rule out there has nothing to do with ethics it has to do with being funny if you're going to be a dick you better be funny otherwise you're going to end up you know getting stabbed in the face or something it happens I it'll probably happen tonight no he's not actually he's in New York okay you know what I'll tell you a quick story about mr. stab because I got some time so Mr stabby we pick him up we're working on him we originally set him up as just trying to figure out his wiring and fixing pneumatics on him and we're setting up a basically a pinata party with the robotic arm this is actually where he got his name we got very drunk and the pneumatic arm wasn't doing a very good job of Smashing the hell out of the the pinata so repeat us whoever met him was inebriated and ran up to him he goes I've got an idea while many of you think Bri has great ideas some of his ideas are less than great this one was a let me hand the robot a knife so he didn't like duct tape and in there he's little to pincer arms he tries to attach like a butcher's knife to it we're sitting there going he's going to kill somebody so I'm walking up it was like dude doesn't your lease have the Three Laws of Robotics in it turns out his lease does have a Three Laws of Robotics in it now that he didn't put him in but mr. stabby at that party apparently someone got enamored with him and we woke up the next morning and found out that he had been profiled in the Columbia newspaper like Columbia University's newspaper someone had done a very serious background check on where the robot came from where he was manufactured contacted the manufacturers tried to figure out where it was sent who it did work for and they got as far as the university that it was sold to in the 70s and then nothing no one knows where where'd spent 20 years and suddenly ended up on it for those who didn't hear the argument is jail entirely possible so that's that's the origin of stabby ok so what do we learn thus far trolls are heavy contributors to cultural values and that's true for every hacker out there there is a troll in fact the original hacking began with defacements for the most part well not the original but stuff that we did the stuff that people of my age group grew up in we had to facers like well SEC everywhere we all knew them we had hack Weiser global hell all these funny people in fact let me tell you a quick story because I really don't have as many slides left as I thought so this is this is a good one in college we set up a honeypot I was my alpha we set it up as a shell server and hand it over to the hack wiser internal IRC server and said this is a compromised machine please use it through one of their members and then we had TTY snoop setup and we watched what everyone was machine and pulled their exploits one guy hopped on with three gigs of binaries and it attempted to execute every last one of them in row x86 binaries we watch this guy for two hours attempt to run every single binary he had on an output so this is the level of competency you see in people who are script kiddies but the level of hilarity that comes out of them is also fairly great LulzSec basically took sequel AI and turned it into an art form they're all going to jail eventually but they were hilarious and that's important our art devotes behavior invokes emotion the modern behavior modification techniques is kind of true we haven't seen the full impact of that yet you haven't seen trolls get fully involved with Google+ or with Facebook there are a couple folks out there one of my friends Tom Ryan gave a Blackhawk thought last year about tracking people with insidious intent on the internet using a fake woman named Robin sage who by the way is my girlfriend he fucked her so the reality is is instead of creating one person on there I could quickly modify one of my scripts to create thousand people on Google+ I have a script that I didn't finish in time for this event but is mostly done and what it does is it generates fake graphs easy to do in GNU plot and thanks to the guys who broke into MIT install of doctoral journals you can now associate any one of those graphs with a doctoral journal you just say this graph is from there and most people will believe you in fact this what this has worked in academia it's a good art it's the problem that you're gonna run into with behavior modification is as people are innately trusting of certain areas people are innately expecting things to be right in certain regions they're just like machines you throw them a curve ball at the right time and they're going to fail so defining standards in the practical application of cutting-edge technology it's kind of true troll Forge and other people basically standardize the way in which you interact with by passing CAPTCHA systems so that their scripts would work between different formed units and so farnum's so forth so on and so forth it's a it's pretty vital to technology that people continue to play with stuff it's pretty vital that they take their planes in the next level and build from there so these are references I added pretty straightforward the troll Forge one is on their behavior modification is on their music piracy links are to the grenade and a couple of other scripts I added and I'll add more as the week goes by but at this point I'd like to ask anyone for questions magnets actually there is a guy in the audience right now that has a great response to that my friend aesthetics over there from Noisebridge had a phenomenal troll the noise bridge crew got together and went to a Clown Posse concert and they offered to do a science fair to insane clown Polytechnic right so they're trying to teach them how magnets work how rainbows were scientists Juggalos just not just not the clowns that you showed me you know those girls were Oh God I assure you they're oh we have another question yes and my name is actually registered to it if you want my home address I am a pirate okay don't tell any of the people I work for that I am though just between us how do I answer that a big part of what we do is manifest destiny you what shipping supplies plenty of shipping supplies is anyone getting this joke Oh oh yeah this is a good one by the way convert all of your your measurements for data to metric to imperial I've been using hogsheads of bytes recently on the internet just to fuck with people and they actually believe it's real works okay any more questions ah so this is important I wasn't lying about that this guy billing we've known him for a little while he's kind of shady we thought he was New Yorker for a while he really wasn't turns out he was a Fed and this is all secondhand but uh billon was basically run around on the Internet being a being a baller you know hanging out with the women you know booze inch boozing sending us lots of updates about his life and we realized that he was very quiet whenever LulzSec was doing anything big and he would drop off of IRC and he started targeting people that we knew like 2600 nets IRC serviced them they got hit by a whole bunch of LulzSec people and we were like okay we got to know this guy he knows all the same places we do and we slip we talked to each other we all confirmed that we were all not involved except for villain no one could figure out villains actual contact info so I highly recommend if there are any federal agents in the audience you hunt this villain down villain is he's large and blond very blond okay any more questions you okay anyone else no one really oh I got one I can't make out what you're saying shout it you know what this is an important lesson if you can't hear someone just respond with something that sounds like what you thought yes absolutely wholly from my heart deeply and morally I believe everything that you just said I would kill to defend those ideals okay anyone else okay actually this is a good argument if you ever want to deal with the fucking European one they know jack shit about our geography they give us shit for not knowing their geography most of them no don't know anything about ours they think that fucking you know Idaho is next New Jersey they also the metric system is retarded for reals if anyone ever actually thought about this for more than five seconds they figure it out yes you can divide by ten its decimal yeah woohoo you can't fucking have it quarter and third it like you can at a 12 12 or a base 16 system and basic Steen goes into binary it's a 2n and it's perfect square okay you know it's conspiracy it never happened if I had to choose a running mate Christopher Walken that man would kill for me I'm sure okay not only did we land on the moon we killed God when we got up there I stole that from the onion but my god that's a wonderful piece of literature I highly recommend reading it okay anyone else you ah so glorious agents of our Central Intelligence Politburo charged valiantly into the buildings intent on destroying the edifice to capitalism that was ruining our nation however unbeknownst to them radical Islamists like this guy right here look at that fucking beard basically destroyed the building they had no idea there was actually going to be a terrorist attack that was actually successful what were the fucking odds yeah I'm sorry I can only speak the truth crap flooding there's actually this bot that actually goes on IRC I don't know if any of you have actually met it but it basically talks about shitting that's that's the actual crap flooding bot that's all it does yeah maybe I was promised cake to all I got was a beer it's pretty good though thank you okay I've got 10 minutes I have more questions shoot babies okay about what oh yeah trolls are highly important to reproduction if there are late any ladies out there I highly recommend okay I'm going to call this talk because people are walking away

Info

Channel: Christiaan008

Views: 425,558

Rating: 4.4974279 out of 5

Keywords: DEF, CON, 19, Hacking, Conference, Presentation, By, Matt, Joyce, The, Art, of, Trolling, Video

Id: AHqGV5WjS4w

Channel Id: undefined

Length: 41min 32sec (2492 seconds)

Published: Wed Feb 15 2012

Reddit Comments

This is a terrible lecture. He basically reads off his slides and repeats dead memes. Sad because the topic has great potential.

👍︎︎ 6 👤︎︎ u/Myxomycota 📅︎︎ Oct 11 2015 🗫︎ replies