Death of Brian Laundrie | Gabby Petito Case Update | Narcissism Warning Signs

hello this is dr grande today i have two questions can i provide an update on the gabby petito brian laundry case given the report that brian laundry is dead and what can we learn about narcissism and domestic violence from this case just a reminder i'm not diagnosed anybody in this video only speculating about what could be happening in a situation like this if you enjoyed this video please like it subscribe to my channel and consider supporting me on patreon i will put the link to patreon in the description for this video first i'll go through a quick summary of this case along with the updated information and then offer my analysis 22 year old gabby petito and 23 year old brian laundry were engaged couple who lived in northport florida with brian's parents on july 2 2021 after visiting gabby's family in new york the couple departed on a cross-country trip in a ford van it appears as though they wanted to establish some type of social media presence as they traveled to various locations like national parks they were involved in a domestic violence incident on august 12th in moab utah neither of them was arrested brian flew back to florida on august 17 but then returned to utah to reunite with gabby so their trip resumed on august 24 the couple traveled to grand teton national park in wyoming at some point after this probably between august 27 and august 29 gabby was strangled and left in the national park brian returned to north port florida alone on september 1. gabby was reported missing on september 11 two days later brian disappeared gabby's body was found in wyoming on september 19. a massive manhunt was initiated to locate brian laundry although he was not charged with murder rather illegally accessing a financial account belonging to gabby it seems likely that eventually he would have been charged with murder on october 20 human remains and some personal belongings were found in a reserve in florida not far from the laundry family home it was immediately clear that the personal belongings were the property of brian laundry the area had previously been underwater which may explain why the discovery was not made sooner the next day on october 21 the authorities confirmed that the human remains belonged to brian laundry by using dental records the case has drawn to a close with the death of brian laundry now moving to my analysis what happened in this case here's my theory based on the information available this is just my opinion i think that gabby and brian had a destructive and toxic relationship like many of these relationships it was characterized by ambivalent feelings so strong feelings in two directions feelings of fear and anxiety on one side but on the other side excitement and passion some of those opposing forces was inaccurately perceived as leaning in a positive direction so when adding and subtracting there was like a net positive value again the way they saw it they saw a net positive value one of course really wasn't there in reality the couple was trying to find their way they wanted excitement and adventure they decided to take a road trip it gave them a sense of purpose and perhaps it was a distraction from their relational problems in reality the trip did not solve their problems it amplified them it is likely that the incident in utah was one of many not just the first time that something like that happened often when somebody's caught a domestic violence situation they have offended many times before that brian who has been described as strange and temperamental was a violent individual who was able to stay under the radar because he had gabby in an isolated situation traveling across the country in a van throughout the trip brian started to become more erratic after almost getting arrested he becomes particularly angry he realizes at some level that there are consequences for his behavior if he keeps being harmful if he keeps mistreating gabby eventually he could be arrested he becomes more angry with gabby because he perceives that she's doing this to him he believes he should be free of all consequences he should not have to answer for any offense he is resentful toward her for that incident on august 12th brian's bad behavior escalates he lashes out at people at a restaurant the stress on gabby is so pronounced she actually goes and apologizes to the people he offended the wheels are coming off of the relationship the combined force of gabby's affection toward brian and her increasing level of fear create a situation where she doesn't feel as though she can escape at some point in late august during some type of argument brian laundry loses control and strangles gabby potito it probably was not premeditated rather it was in the heat of the moment not being prepared ryan doesn't know what to do once his rage subsides he is now fearful of consequences he has some awkward encounters with people in wyoming he tries hitchhiking with a couple of people they view him as unusual and odd he may have been trying to escape the area or build some type of alibi brian decides to flee to his parents in florida on his way he uses an account belonging to gabby to get money after arriving in florida he tells his parents something that prompts them to hire an attorney it may have also been that they figured it out brian came back alone so they knew there was some type of problem that may have some legal ramifications brian goes on a camping trip with his family five days after he returned to florida for the final time ryan is struggling to regulate his emotions he knows that he has committed murder he is fearful about going to prison for the rest of his life there is no way out he doesn't have the resources to go on the run he knows the authorities will find gabby's body soon he didn't do anything to hide her body and the authorities knew approximately where she was it's only a matter of time before he's arrested for brian ownership is not an option he cannot take responsibility brian decides to go to reserve not far from his home and brings an end to his own life it's not clear when that happened but the authorities using dental records to identify his body suggest that it didn't happen just a few days before the discovery he had probably died some time ago the death of brian laundry brings this case to its conclusion we will never know exactly what happened considering the narcissistic characteristics that he likely possessed in his final moments he probably did not feel remorse rather he was just feeling sorry for himself during this whole situation brian was trying to exert control he controlled when gabby died he controlled information like not telling the authorities where her body was and ultimately he controlled his own exit strategy he had about two weeks to consider his course of action it was not impulsive he knew full well what he was doing in one sense brian laundry avoided justice and another he paid the ultimate price for his crime there are many conflicted feelings about whether justice was served in this case moving to the next question what does this case teach us about narcissism and domestic violence a related question would be how can similar crimes be prevented in the future both men and women can be perpetrators of domestic violence but this case of course involved a man so that's what i'll focus on one of the keys to preventing domestic violence is understanding the tendencies among men who commit these types of offenses here is the profile of the most common characteristics among these types of perpetrators being between the ages of 20 and 34 unemployed or low employment a criminal background 70 percent have been arrested for at least a misdemeanor 35 percent have been arrested for a felony failure to take responsibility for offenses always blaming the victim and excessive drug use as far as personality several different features are evident including anti-social narcissistic borderline schizoid and dependent many of the warning signs involve narcissism that's the trait that really stands out offenders often have characteristics like being grandiose self-centered and having a sense of entitlement as well as some characteristics specifically related to vulnerable narcissism including being insecure resentful vindictive full of shame hypersensitive and angry in addition we see anti-social characteristics like being deceptive impulsive and irresponsible here's some of the warning signs specifically around narcissistic and related traits a man who is willing to destroy themselves to destroy their partner a man who seeks to control their partner believes that they own their partner develops a destiny mindset like they can't picture a world without their partner they're destined to be together no other outcome is acceptable threatens their partner by telling them they'll never find anyone as good as him tries to make their partner feel inferior and a man who suffers from narcissistic rage a temper of any type is an important warning sign moving to the last question can a perpetrator like this ever change the answer is technically yes but in reality it doesn't happen a lot interestingly age is a major predictor of a decreased risk so as a man grows older their risk of offending drops dramatically older men are much safer from a standpoint of domestic violence but age is only going to count for so much change just because someone is older doesn't automatically mean they're going to be safe counseling can help perpetrators but a person has to want to recover they have to want to make changes that's the real problem narcissistic people are very resistant to change because they don't have insight or empathy so back to that original question what can people do to prevent situations like the gabby potito brian laundry case realistically it's probably about mate selection more than anything else changing people is challenging putting up what the violence is not a good idea it's all about picking the right person initially no positive emotion like love affection passion excitement or comfort can outweigh high levels of anger immaturity narcissism or low levels of empathy and insight the presence of the undesirable traits should be the primary consideration those are my thoughts on the case of gabby petito ryan laundry as well as my thoughts on narcissism and domestic violence please put any opinions and thoughts in the comment section they always generate an interesting dialogue as always i hope you found my analysis of this topic to be informative thanks for watching

Channel: Dr. Todd Grande

Views: 532,171

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Id: 88hAL3QyFKQ

Length: 11min 29sec (689 seconds)

Published: Thu Oct 21 2021