Dealing with Aggressive Drunks and Avoiding Confrontations - Jocko Willink

Jaakko had an incident I wanted your opinion on love your book and podcast always listen apply your lessons to my life job and family I was driving home one night with my wife and four-year-old son in the car when some drunk idiot was walking in the middle of the roadway he stood in front of my car refusing to move running his mouth my wife begged me not to get out of the car gotta reach to his front reached into his front waistband like he had a gun and all and although myself being a police officer and having countless incidents and experience like this I didn't feel he did more like drunken bravado or grandstanding any case so I was armed and having trained in boxing and a little bit of jiu-jitsu felt I could have handled the situation this lasted about a minute of him standing there and eventually I just drove around him while he was running his mouth calling me names and all that stuff my first priority obviously is getting my family home safely and making sure nobody will ever do any harm to them but another part of me felt like what am i teaching my son I mean is that okay um you know is that okay to let people disrespect you at acting anyway they want towards you so I dropped off my so I dropped off my family and went back looking for the guy he was gone I guess lucky for me as well as him I'm questioning my decision not out of ego but only because of the example I want to be to my son that you never go looking for trouble and confrontation but you don't back down from it either ever okay well just first of all you won just so you know you won you got a wife and a kid yeah you won right so options will be options here but for one if you're police officer you could call the police you could you know get on your radio and call him to say what's going on and have this guy arrested before he causes an actual accident being out in the strode like an idiot being out in the road like an idiot so that's an option but but the other thing is like what are you trying to teach your son are you trying to teach your son that he should fight every idiot that offends him he's if you if that's what you teach him he is not gonna have a very productive life or a very nice life so there's too many negatives right that can happen there this actually happened to something similar to this happen to me a little while ago I was down by the ocean that might appear in the neighborhood where I live and there was a like a Tweaker crazy you know drunk on drugs and all that and it was it wasn't as direct as this he wasn't he wasn't saying anything me but he's Yellin swear words and and he's in front of my kid my kid this is when my son was probably six or seven years old and he's just alone he's isolated but he's swearing him just acting crazy right and what I did was I said to my son okay you see this guy right here have you heard of what drugs are this is what drugs do do right here this this guy this is where it ends up so this guy's a miscreant he's a criminal you know the other thing I told him I said what if this guy attacks us what do you think would happen and my son was kind of you know well you would choke him because my son trained you to - at that time he was well you would choke him I was like that's right I'm not afraid of this guy we're not afraid of this guy this is no factor cuz we know how to fight we know how to defend ourselves but that being said what we want to do is we want to avoid this situation you know there's all kinds of all kinds of bad things that can happen there Lee you know this I told my son like this guy could have a knife guy could have a gun this guy could have this guy could just have a blood-borne disease right this guy could have a blood-borne disease now I go get in a fight with him and now I have a blood-borne disease you know what it would it that's horrible it's a horrible situation so like I said I told him that this is this is why we trained this is why we know how to use firearms because when people are maniacs and and if they're insane and psychopathic and they have weapons you need to have a weapon yourself you need to be able to defend yourself so our pride is what I teach my son my primary objective is to be safe right - to not get to avoid these situations and guess what if you still feel the need to like be a man in the situation or prove that your man or prove to your son that which is valuable I'm not trying to put that down you want your son to see that that that you should be strong and that you should be able to stand up for yourself and that you will don't ever have to back down to anybody but that's why your son comes with you to the gym that's why he trans Jitsu that's why you trained you so that's why he watches you day in day out day out working out being strong being tough going to the gym training with firearms that's why he sees all that stuff so he knows I mean I'll say right now my kids if you were to ask my kids like against a random person in the street they would they basically think I could beat up anyone in the world because any training all the time right that's all they see me do so so that's that now the disrespect part the IDE disrespected me right just respect I'm you know disrespect me is one thing but now you disrespect my wife hmm right well again how can you be disrespected I know that's what I explained I wouldn't explain to my son you cannot just be disrespect be disrespected by someone that has no respect for themselves and if you are a drunk idiot in the street you have no respect for yourself you don't you cannot disrespect me it is impossible for you to give me disrespect you can even respect yourself as a human so so that's just that's just it doesn't even count and I'll tell my son that all day long or any my kids that all day long you can't be disrespected by someone that doesn't even respect themselves you know what I am respect I'm even respectful to this drunk idiot giving him the benefit of doubt I am respect so you know then the other piece is not backing down from trouble right and I'm not gonna back down from trouble but I am going to avoid it and I'm gonna avoid it and you know what trouble avoids me yeah it avoids me and if you are working now and you're staying strong and you have the confidence because you know you can handle yourself trouble is going to avoid you 99% of the time and the other thing is you gotta tell your kids I mean my son is getting older now if he gets in a fight with someone he could kill him I mean that's just straight-up what could happen and so now I've got an you know he's a young kid so he's got a he's got to do the things that you're talking about in this question himself who's that he's not gonna back down I got explained to him listen let me tell you what comes with getting in a street fight a cool rush this is fun right it's fun so you get that maybe you get a little bit of props you get a little bit of respect from the from the you get a cred right some street cred from your people yeah let me tell you what else comes with it along with those two things which are which are cool right possible jail time possible injuries possible lawsuits the broken hand I mean even if it's just okay those are the big ones right jail time which there's been plenty of cases where there was a clay case here in San Diego guy punched another guy fell on the curb dead died right now those things really happen yeah not to mention you could get you know you get jail time you get an injury not not to mention you could get killed right cuz you think you're a tough guy guess what you're the greatest MMA fighters in the world get caught with a crack in the face and they get knocked out you fall down and hit a curb you you could die so there's that aspect too but then you get to the injuries right cuz you get in a street fight you're gonna get some kind of an injury you're gonna get some kind of an injury it's just gonna happen you know whether it's just a little cut or a little brazen you're gonna have something that's a pain it could be a major injury you could break your hand that happens all the time lawsuits because now you're gonna get sued you know they're coming after you and it's just a stupid thing like a rip jacket or scuff me it just isn't worth the it isn't worth it especially because we're talking about an individual that you can crush in an instant and that has no value as a human this fan what this person's doing right none this person is an idiot don't go down to their level and play that game instead avoid that and go to the gym and train more and be ready you know that's my opinion good job on walking away going out to find the guide luckily you already said luckily you didn't find it yeah cuz right now who knows maybe you'd be the guy that's on you going to jail the cop that oh you're a cop and you were armed and you went and got in a fight with this guy and you pulled your weapon because you were losing then you shot him and then what do we see when you see somebody that had a cell phone and they recorded the whole thing and they see you pushing this guy around yeah it's not a good situation and you got to be Woltz were responsible when you're carrying ultra responsible you're carrying you know that we all know that when we carry we got to avoid that's that's what we have to do when we're packing well yeah and you can kind of tell when when someone's scared you know when like if this guy and a guy in the street and you're in the car that's I don't know that seems wrong besiege I run and you go home but you know if someone's like get it like if you're walking on the sidewalk and he gets in your way that's you know it's kind of different or whatever but avoiding the situation yeah and you're not scared because you're prepared or whatever and you you simply walk around or go the other way or something like that the people with you they can tell they can tell you're not scared if you tell you're making the rider but if you are scared whether you fight the guy or you run away scared they can tell that to ya so I had another situation another day I was walking out straight with my hope well oh yeah with my whole family dang yeah going to get some ice cream it was a couple months goes in the summertime I'm gonna get some ice cream hell I had a discipline disciplinary breakdown in my own mentality I'm just going to get ice cream yeah so we're walking down the street and out of nowhere this guy just gets in my feel like stood up and got in my face look really fast and I I just kind of looked at him and sort of did the you know into the semi not a full-on fight stance but I turned you know like a quarter turn and just looked at him because I thought okay we're gonna rock and roll we'll make this happen any almost instantly what happened where you just described it happened as soon as the guy got in my face he look immediately within what within a half a second immediately back down and walked away it was like he was just trying to prove something then he realized really quick he was gonna get crushed yeah but anyways that's the same thing you know like I could tell oh you want to fight you know yeah that story about Malheur euler gracie : there told me this story and i guess you know how there's a really good surfer and ola was out surfing at a spot in San Diego and you know San Diego like all surfing areas is pretty um territorial and there's some there's some or some aggression in the surf in anyways some guy started getting aggressive with with Hoyle ER and Holder said to him some classic line it was something along the lines of hey man you surf for a living I fight for a living if you want to go to the beach let me know otherwise be quiet I thought that was a great line nicely done all breath this time we win but it's the same you know when they're small for those of you don't know who either Gracie is whole there's a small small guy he's a obviously a master of jiu-jitsu but he's only 150 pounds 155 pounds maybe really small guy and he's a nice guy so he's not a guy that he's not a guy that's gonna be intimidated he's not he's not his looks are not going to intimidate anybody I don't even think he has cauliflower ears I mean it's just he just looks like a nice guy and he is a nice guy and he's got a nice presence about him yeah so what I'm saying is what again to reinforce what you just said when someone is confident to that level even though they're 145 or 150 pounds and looked like a nice guy with a smile on their face when you confidently say look you know what I do for a living I fight if you want to go to the beach and fight let me know and the guy says oh you know what I'm good and I'll just leave you alone that sounds like a plan the little detector goes off like danger you know yeah danger I'm gonna get my ass beat yeah but and some but some guys are as far as decision-making goes some guys are crazy you know we're like how you said like if they're like on drugs or this guy in this case if you sit in the middle of the road acting like you know boys in the hood kind we got a problem here currently that's what he said he was doing like he's obviously off you know like he's not a decision-maker kind of thing so you know if you jump into a situation with them it's kind of unpredictable in that weird way you know yeah let me tell you something else let's say the guy has a gun or doesn't have a gun you had the moment to get away from him yeah if you thought you had a gun you get away from him right let's say you said oh you know what I'm gonna confront him right now so you you let's say you get a shootout you kill him guess what you gotta do now you gotta hire a lawyer you gotta hang up you gotta take a break from work because you're a copy there's all these things not worth but it's just a pain in the ass is what it is it's almost like I mean maybe I'm wrong here but it's almost like you can't really like what what's the thing what's the goal we're going for the first question today yeah what's your reason why yeah your reason for doing this yeah like I'm gonna go out and and I'm looking I'm gonna look for the guy but then like what's the goal like what's the out like what are we going for there we go look for him to tell him not to do that again or what to arrest enough to kick his ass to believe right what's going on yeah and then even that you don't a lot of times we don't I know when you're in that moment you don't think past that you're just like I gotta get my whatever my revenge really is what it is he shouldn't have done that to me I'm gonna go teach him a lesson kind of a thing I mean that's the feeling ya know yeah but guys are weird man you can jump into that weirdness but I just go home if you're family and watch when the confrontation happens the best-case scenario isn't good the best-case scenario oh yeah this is the best-case scenario that's gonna happen yeah it isn't good yeah because you got even if you walk up and knock the guy out with one clean punch you gotta you got a broken finger you know you got a broken knuckle even if you walk up and choke the guy you got his grimy puke all over you know what I mean it's just there there's nothing that good is gonna come out of ya and OH other than it feels good to fight but that can easily be remedied by going to the gym and fighting all your buddies and in this case I don't know you know this guy oh you you knocked out a weird homeless guy in a in the middle of the road and getting your family like I don't see how that's cool yeah no God I mean maybe I don't know if that would feel good I don't think so yeah but yeah it's kind of weird this one time we went on this cruise and it was me Terry Tim you know he's like takes huge joke like I'm kind of big or whatever Tim and our girlfriends this guy was behind us in the booth we're at a restaurant or something and um we were like what I guess the booths were flimsy so we're shaking the booth he was behind us he got up all crazy he's like hey God yeah you guys are big but you guys keep knocking the booth we're gonna like basically called us out to a fight kid like tattoos everywhere on his neck and stuff and at first I was like man is this guy joking over like what's going on I was confused and to be honest I was like stunned like almost like I didn't this scenario was so foreign to me Oh sniping and not even know what to say I don't even know what everyone else was doing that's how stunned that was but then Tim he was like he's stacking stuff so he was like this be serious right now it just jumps ace that he like stands up goes to fight him but the guy was a weirdo that's the thing it was like all of us big guys you know and Tim was like he wasn't scared oh he was ready like fight so it gets in his feet that face there about if I want us cruised by the way we're fighting you can't fight on a cruise No so it's this big scene you know and the guy like he was like I don't know I guess he was ready to die or something because he was like kinda down the fight and guys came in like I think broke it up or whatever went to make this big report it was like this big thing so it was all just a pain in the ass is basically right we're saying like what if we fought that guy you know the autumn Elizabeth or what if Tim Potter yeah whatever is getting arrested yeah you got a lawsuit against him and we were on a cruise yeah exactly it's all stupid yeah don't do that Ken stuff

Channel: Jocko Podcast

Views: 909,064

Keywords: discipline, freedom, military, extreme ownership, leadership, advice, jocko willink, echelon front, navy seal, jocko podcast, excerpt, echo charles, leader, lead, win, defcor, discipline equals freedom

Id: Kba8PZwzS0Y

Length: 17min 32sec (1052 seconds)

Published: Tue Jun 25 2019