Dad/Stepmom Kicked Me Out When I Was 7 mons Pregnant, Now Wants Me To Take In My Half-Brother.. AITA

[Music] first store is titled am i the a-hall for refusing to take in my half-brother after my dad kicked me out when i was seven months pregnant i female 32 lost my mother when i was young my dad met my stepmom and got married to her shortly i have a half brother and we grew up together i was dealing with issues and resorted to the outside for support i found out i was pregnant when i was 17 and my dad was mad at me he took away my college fund and saved it for my brother he and my stepmom told me i needed to get a job since i wasn't going to college and ended up telling me to leave the house when i was seven months pregnant i lived with my ex's family despite issues i had with my ex until my daughter was 2 years old we got separated and moved out from my ex-family house and rented a place that i paid for by working at a restaurant my daughter is doing well and is concentrating on school and dart i heard that my half brother dropped out of college and that he got involved in debts that my dad ended up paying for my half brother went back to live at his parents house with his pregnant wife but my dad couldn't pay more cage anymore and decided to sell the house pay for debts and buy a small apartment my half brother never reached out nor tried to have a relationship with me i met him at the restaurant and he started telling me about what happened with my dad i tried to end the conversation since i wasn't feeling comfortable and two days after that my dad was at my door i told him he wasn't allowed to come in after he started asking about my daughter and suddenly started to care i asked him why he came and he went on about his health problems his daughter-in-law's issues with my step-mom and how the apartment wasn't bearable with the constant fights and arguments he asked if i could take in my brother since his wife can no longer stay with them and causing issues he said that my apartment was spacious and it's only me and my daughter there he said that his son can't afford a rent right now and that i should take this chance to get to know him and his family better i told him i can't take him in i didn't want to bring it up but i reminded him that he kicked me out when i was seven months pregnant my dad told me that i'm his sister and needed to help and ask if i'd react differently if he was not my half brother the argument went on he told me to not try to punish him by using his son and that my stepmom will then be right about me if i refuse we haven't talked since and i have mixed feelings about this i feel awful to be honest and i don't even know how my daughter would react to this now for the top comments not the a-hole your father abandoned you in favor of his new family and now that he's gone to crap expects you to help him don't allow these people anywhere near you or your daughter it's just too much for me to take when i'm barely able to stand on my feet i have experienced difficult times and my family didn't bother even ask how i was doing they weren't even there for my daughter to try and have a relationship with her my stepmom still feels the same about me and expects me to keep the peace i think the best thing for you to do is to go no contact block them from all forms of communication and don't look back best of luck to you not the a-hole girl no don't let him guess like you into guilt they kicked you out and forgot about you at one of the most vulnerable times in your life don't adjust anything for them your brother will figure it out if daddy stopped saving him you figured it out no ma'am don't allow any of this negativity into your space and who cares what your stepmother thinks about you she doesn't sign your checks she doesn't pay your bills and she doesn't help you with your child nope yeah brother can go to a homeless shelter or something not ahol he doesn't get to take away your college fund give it to his son then come back and ask for your help when his son squanders his opportunities you're doing well for yourself and your daughter and him adding that barb about his wife who even cares what his wife thinks especially after all this time stepmother couldn't even raise her own son to be independent and capable what makes you think i care about her opinion now for the next story am i the ahol for telling my youngest daughter that i cannot give her away at her wedding long back story i have two daughters anna elder and carly younger who are a year apart carly and anna were close when they were younger but drifted apart in their teenage years i think she started resenting carly because scarley always seemed to do well academically and socially anna decided to take loans and go to a college she wasn't really a fan of carly got a full ride to anna's dream college anna became very resentful after that she was sure that carly chose that college to rub it in anna's face i tried my best to accommodate them both anna refused to talk to carly and didn't consent to any form of therapy carly refused to compromise as anna kept being unreasonable in the end they both stop talking to each other neither of them has ever asked me to choose between them as long as i don't bring up the other or try to get them to reconcile i have a good relationship with both of them now anna is a single mom with a three-year-old kid alex who is always in between jobs and in debt me and my now-wife help out when we can she receives a bit of child support but i have to admit that she is struggling carly on the other hand lives comfortably has an incredible job and is living with her long-term boyfriend recently carly announced that her boyfriend proposed and that she wants to plan a wedding in 2022 she asked me to walk her down the aisle and i may have cried a bit however anna found out and then she came over to my house and had a breakdown about how she always thought she would be the first to get married in the family and she has always wanted me to give her away first i tried to console her but she ended up getting angry and told me that i should refuse to give away carly or have a father-daughter dance with her at the wedding at first i refused but she then threatened to cut off all contact between her alex and us if alex wasn't in the picture i would have cut anna off as things stand i need to consider alex's well-being carly is staunchly child-free and is very possible that alex is going to be my only grandchild without my help alex's life is just going to be much harder and i cannot abandon alex with a good conscience while i understood that carly would be upset alex was a child and he is priority i spoke to carly explain the situation i told her that there was still time and i would figure out a way to get anna to change her mind if not i still promised her that i would still be very involved with her wedding except those two things carly just left and told me not to bother with her anymore and told me she wasn't going to invite me to her wedding i definitely know that anna is a nail putting me in this position but am i the ahol for expecting carly to be more understanding now for the top comments you're the a-hole you're letting your daughter and her selfish once win you're not choosing alex you're choosing anna over carly shame on you if i were you i'd go anna's bluff she sounds like she's not doing too hot in life my guess is should go no contact for a week before realizing she needs all the support she can get i agree with this assertion you would not be abandoning your grandchild anna would be purposefully taking him away from you sounds a bit like you were just giving in to the daughter who throws the biggest tantrum it sucks to see parents choose the selfish bratty kid because of the grandkids yet throw away their other daughter who is obviously not as important and she isn't providing you with grandkids you're the a-hole stop rewarding bad behavior carly deserves to be walked down the aisle by her dad i would also be prepared to bet that if anna ever gets married she will still expect you to walk her down the aisle and throw a tantrum to make it happen you're the a-hole holy crap are you the a-hole your oldest child has been an abusive monster to your younger daughter for the better part of her life and as you've described it here you've been complicit in it the fact that you would even remotely entertain anna's insane demand grandchild or no shows how unsupportive you've been if you want any hope of keeping carly in your life tell anna she's being ridiculous and you're not going to allow her to dictate the terms of your relationship with carly jesus christ i can't believe you need someone to tell you this you're the a-hole hundred percent neither of them has ever asked me to choose between them well anna just asked and you gave in to her immediately you just chose your overly jealous daughter over what the one that was more successful carly's being punished because she was better in school more social etc how is that fair and using your reasoning as carly will never give you grandchildren is that the price of love to you it sounds like anna has been throwing herself a pity party because she doesn't want to come to terms with the fact that she is different than her sister not worse or better but different and you just validated her not coming to terms with that i'm glad carly uninvited you from the wedding who treats their daughter like that and still expects to be in their life now for the last story am i ahal for not following ax's wishes to not be involved with my son well she was technically a fling but i'll still say x though anyways i was a young and dumb 18 year old who thought i was so cool for hooking up with an older married woman she was 30 and that was considered older to me i admit it was not my proudest moment but i was going through a bad time in my life and was making a lot of reckless choices things ended after three months and didn't hear from her again don't think i'll have enough characters to explain the whole story so i will need to keep it brief i found out we had a song together jay who's now 20 he knew about me four years and found me her husband found out she cheated as soon as she got pregnant but still stuck around while jay was growing up i never had a clue about his existence until now when jay reached out he just wanted to get to know me so we met up from there we started talking more regularly and i learned about his home life jay doesn't get along with his dad at all felt they were never closed for as long as he can remember and there was always this detachment that he didn't understand until he was told the truth the more i spent time with jay the closer we became it's made me feel sad honestly that i couldn't be in his life sooner and feel like i missed so much we talked to each other regularly and he comes to my house almost every other weekend safe to say we've bonded quite a lot a couple nights ago i was contacted by my ex and she told me jay has completely pulled away from her husband and doesn't want to speak to him she feels my relationship with jay is what's causing this and asked me to limit contact with him when i refused she berated me for causing them problems and said i don't even belong in his life when i've only been a dad less than a year i ended up getting some things off my chest that i didn't get the chance to do before since finding out i had a son our fight didn't get anywhere and i haven't spoken to her i did talk to jay about this and he said whenever he visited they fought and jay got tired of his controlling behavior turns out they were also fighting because of the fact jay was spending more time with me while it makes me feel good that my son wants to spend time with me i do feel guilty that it's caused him to distance himself from my ex-husband i feel like my presence has made their strained relationship worse and i don't know if i'm being a selfish a-hole here by not limiting my involvement i have encouraged jay to speak with him but he seems set on not wanting any more to do with him now for the top comments not the aha he deserves a relationship with you it's great you welcome him with open arms and are treating him with honest and caring respect it's clear he doesn't get enough of that at home also don't blame yourself for being young and dumb you were only 18 and she was the experienced adult who should know better i wonder what people would say if it was a 30 year old man who impregnated an 18 year old edit in case it wasn't clear my last comment is to imply that this woman sounds like a predator 18 is so young and i hate that opie blames himself when what she did was very shifty as for the strain on the marriage is from her cheating she should have known your son would come and find you eventually sounds like your son's mother and her husband thought as long as you weren't in the picture they could pretend to get past the cheating not the ahol your son is a grown adult and can choose to spend time with whomever he wants if his stepdad did a better job bonding with him as a child then maybe he wouldn't cast him aside like he is doing now this drama is on them this drama is on them one the mom cheated with opie two her husband stayed with her and rescinded a fair baby three the mom never told opi he was a dad then gets all pissy because he's getting involved now and only knew him for a year because he only learned of his existence a year ago yeah i think this drama is on them sums it up pretty well not ahol wow you have done everything right and nothing wrong sounds like jay unfortunately has a bit of a toxic life at home jay is a grown man and can make his own choices i feel sad for jay that he has felt that detachment from his let's call him stepfather but realistically jay should be and feel supported to get to know you i know this as a dad if i was in a situation i would support my son to meet his bio dad hopefully that made sense if crap hits the fan i'd be prepared to take him in and show him the fatherly love is obviously lacked for 20 years it's what's made me regret my action the most although i could never regret having jay he and his dad had to live with the consequences of our actions jay's been living on his own since he started college so he's not currently living with them but i'd still be willing to help out in the future if he ever needs it i'm doing what i can to make up for the years we lost now and that's the end of this video folks as always leave a comment and hit like and subscribe and if you want more of this content turn your notification on to get updated on the latest videos and i'll catch you in the next one stay safe [Music]

Channel: GC Reddit Stories

Views: 105,787

Rating: 4.8856139 out of 5

Keywords: bf, aita, r/aita, relationship advice, reddit stories, update, bridezilla, entitled people, cheating, girlfriend, wife, husband, divorce, parenting, relationship, advice, mother in law, relationship stories, dna results, not the father, parental, reddit update, reddit relationship advice, reddit relationship, reddit cheating, aita update, family drama, open marriage, Curious Redd, open relationship, x bf, caught, stories, cheat, x gf, reddit, askreddit, surviving, infidelity, gurlcan reddit

Id: 2cyDSAsd3XM

Length: 14min 46sec (886 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 06 2020