Couple Reacts to the DEEPER Issues with Jada and Will's Red Table Talk

[Music] here here's the thing i know you got things to say um here's the thing you know i don't like sensationalizing and stuff like that right right um and so i would usually normally back away from public something that's hot in the press right now yeah absolutely um i would usually back away from it but we're sheltering in place we ain't got nothing to do i'm going into it without any of the presuppositions of what their marriage is like or what they're supposed to be doing or anything that's been in the tabloids or press i think i want to respect the marriage as a marriage period and without any of the the gossip that goes around i'm going into the listening to them directly yeah i think it was it was important for me because of the kind of conversations that we initially started out having about this we're from a perspective of you know being marriage coaches and stuff like that and i honestly think there are things possibly that we could say that that or that we will be saying that will speak to something other than oh girl ooh let me tell you right type of situation because that was done i know you wouldn't be doing it let's go into it let's go into a clean let's go into a clear and let's just watch and see what we see okay all right here we go this red table for me um just all the stuff that's going on in the press i felt like it was important to come to the table to really clear the air somebody made a statement for me that wasn't a statement i made that went cray-cray and one of the reasons why i wanted to come to the table is the media the headlines we specifically never said anything yeah we were purposely not saying anything any headline that says jada said or will said or the smith said is not true we've specifically never said anything pause yes first of all my man will don't look good to me like i don't and i know we're gonna talk about it but i just i don't even like the way he looks in here like i feel like i just want to go hug him not from like who is will smith hug but like come here give me a hug brother but here's the thing and and and i'll get into the until to more will later the thing is is that number one um what they're doing right now is controlling the narrative they are olivia poping their situation i wouldn't don't do that okay they're a little bit right but no really they're they're controlling the narrative and so because they're controlling the narrative they're already letting us know that this is something that they've kept silent jada um will and jada have always been very uh protective about their relationship anyway yeah regardless of the gossip right and the idea that they kept these things silent what they're saying what they're literally saying is is that okay we we've been forced to speak out now i say that to say this you said you're worried about him she is very i mean this is her show this is red table talk and this is her thing she's made up she's beautiful she's doing all she's doing all that right yeah she looks amazing but you got to understand the studio is where they live this brother is like all right let's just do it and as far as i can understand and see maybe we'll see more later i understand will to be a full-grown man right who is not about pretension unless he's doing a role you see what i'm saying i'm not saying that there's no rosemary it's always going to be roles being played in these type things but what i'm saying is is that he probably said okay let's let's just go ahead and do this okay okay okay i still want to give him a hug but okay and you can give him a hug all right so coming to the table was like we just felt like it got to the point where you got to say something yeah and and to stop that cycle yeah you know there's people's feelings involved right right you know and at the end of the day i don't like how all of this came to be that doesn't matter it's all love honestly and i would usually not you know that that would be something i wouldn't comment on at all yeah you know and i feel like it's a situation that i consider private you just feel like it ain't really nobody no no nobody's business but yeah but now black twitter has claimed it as dave business so what happened jada okay so let's start with that's him being funny what happened four and a half years ago started a i think it was about four and a half four years ago um started a friendship with august real quick the idea that it num i'm not looking at the number i'm looking at her asking four and a half years ago and he says that's that shows that they've already dealt with this right okay i just want to point that out but have they and we're gonna put a pin in this have they dealt with it play i just i have questions all right let's see if they answer we actually became really really good friends and it all started with you know just needing some help you know me wanting to help his health his mental state because for me that was the thing when i when um when og first came around he was he was really sick he was sorry okay no no you go first and then i'm i don't maybe okay no wait let me go go this was three years i'm sorry four and a half years ago which means you have a 23 year old boy who came to you sick and she said i wanted to help him yeah i wanted to help him with his health and whatever else it was it was going through to me as an almost 40 year old woman aka you you were mothering him yeah you you took it up on you to mother him what were you going to say well the first thing i i noticed number one will say og what that means is yeah what that what that tells us right now is is that there's no ill intentions and that he's still referring to him in their nickname right okay and they're looking at august's mental state okay so he's in a mental state now here's one thing that i do no and i and i do recognize what you were saying or alluding to is that women do tend to no matter how powerful a woman is no matter how great her husband is women tend to find their purpose in broken men um and i don't know we will continue to watch this but it's easier to if you're in a position where you're lending help or lending a helping hand women are nurturers so part of the fulfillment of their nurturing part of it is in their children but the other part of it isn't broken men you see what i'm saying so i see i see the potential pitfalls here we're going to listen to some more but i see where this could be this could be an issue for him yeah you mothered him i'm angry with that but go ahead baby the outpouring for him from our family was initially about his health yeah and i mean we found all those different resources you know to help pull them through and from there you know you and i were going through a very difficult time yeah and we decided i was done with joey yeah you kicked me to the curb with you yeah marriages have that though marriages have that yeah we basically we broke up we decided that we were going to separate for a period of time and you go figure out how to make yourself happy boom boom what's boom i feel like we're going to be at odds with this this whole time but go home what's your boom baby what's your boom no no no no we're not going to be at odds because we we are we aren't at odds if we're looking at it from a counseling standpoint we never are at odds right baby but what i'm saying is is that he pointed out something very important they were finished with each other they were at a separation point okay separation is not a divorce you know one thing that we believe in isn't um functioning or working separations where you get away from each other in order to heal but that does not mean you violate the marriage but what i'm saying is you're looking when he says that that identifies something here right there's always a subtext and what we're looking at is what we were talking about before that mothering the idea that in order because i'm not with my man who my husband i'm looking out for what makes me happy and what makes me happy as a powerful woman because jada pinkett is you know how i feel about jada pinka smith she's a she's a very powerful woman yes and with that idea because she's i mean they're both they're powerful individuals singularly or individually so but a woman is still a woman and she will always if it's available she will find her place in a man who needs her so here you go you find a broken man or a broken man is already in your midst he's attractive he's young but jada doesn't need anybody to tell her she looks good she doesn't need to feel any good she's not she's not looking for self fulfillment in a sense that i need to feel better about myself and that way she's looking for purpose and that's where the that's where the the breakdown comes in at you see what i'm saying absolutely well at that particular point in time it was indefinite yeah i really felt like we could be over yeah no we were over and then what did you do jada you know i think what'd you do from there you know as time went on i got into a different kind of entanglement with august one thing i want to get clear about and clean up one of the things that was kind of swirling in the press about you giving permission which is uh you know the only person that can give permission in in that particular circumstances myself because i could actually see how he would perceive it as permission because we were separated amicably and i think he also wanted to make it clear that he's not a home wrecker which he's not i'm thinking so i mean because this is your red table and you like brought yourself to the red table i think um you need to say clearly what happened as far as what you and i decided we were going to take our space and what happened yeah and then i got into an entanglement with august that's what i said i keep seeing an entanglement yes yes a relationship yes it was a relationship absolutely i was in a lot of pain and i was very broken now in the process of that relationship i definitely realized that you can't find happiness outside of yourself mm-hmm that's the problem right there because she wasn't looking for happiness outside of herself she wasn't chasing a dude she was looking for self fulfillment fulfillment self fulfillment in someone else and i do see where her what i'm looking for is those glimpses of weaknesses that caused her or it made her able to do that it was enemies of a separation she said i was hurting yes and she said i was in pain so now she's in a place where she's hurting and she's in pain why is she hurting and in pain if she implies that it's because of the breaking of her marriage then there's a place to be fulfilled you see what i'm saying yeah but she never had to lean on she never had to as far as we know as far as we know as far as we know pour into will as a broken person she never they they're both hit strong people right and i think as women this is where a lot of times let's just say we have a great marriage but we're still feeling unhappy unfulfilled and a lot because now you're also dealing with someone whose kids were probably getting to that age of grown and didn't need her anymore either exactly and so when you get to place like i'm very unhappy i'm very broken i'm very unfulfilled before you start looking outside of everything else that you have going on what has just happened in my life in my direct sphere of influence that has said that has made me basically unhappy in this place so because we put our purpose into our husbands our family our children when those things go in a different direction when they don't need us anymore and it's just us left with we have no idea who we are after that because we spent years in her case probably 18 19 20 years 23 years if you count trey being something a mother for all of these people in your life and now it's like i'm unhappy because we don't maybe realize that we've been putting ourselves away for the sake of our family there you go and luckily enough you and i were also going through a process of healing in a much different manner i would definitely say and we did everything that we could to get away from each other only to realize that that wasn't possible so we come to the rear table so i mean i'm in the jada position right now so you know you during that time launched into an interaction you're absolutely right she looks very like oh like what else is he coming with because that last question she wouldn't expect him you're absolutely right he's also pointing okay when when a man continues to say okay what did you do what's going on uh-huh what's happened how did you get here what he's doing is he's beckoning for you to be accountable oh yes now women do the same thing but they do it a little bit different and they do it a little bit more aggressive because a woman is hurt in a way that she could articulate her hurt in a in a very focused way a man tries to be logical i'm not saying he's hurt now and i would say would you say he feels hurt because it's resurfaced i do i do um anything that's i mean any any scar that's reopened it might not be as deep a wound but it's still painful you see what i'm saying and so now he's saying well be accountable because i am not a part of this what did you do yes and understand that you were wrong in doing this right okay let's let's see let's see what uh they say with august what do you feel like um you were looking for i just wanted to feel good it had been so long since i felt good and it was really a joy to just help heal somebody yeah boom there it is there it is there it is it was a joy to help heal somebody it was a joy to help nurture somebody it was a joy to help build somebody it was a joy for to be needed as a woman really quickly this is just one of the things that we tell people all the time especially after coming out of a bad relationship or you're trying to rediscover yourself or whatever find ways to serve other people not people to get relationships with but find ways to serve other people because it's there that you will find your joy it's there a lot of times that you will find your purpose unfortunately she took a different path serving organizations yes yes through organizations yes feeding the hungry we're in the middle of a pandemic right now how can you help your community around you if you're going through this in a way that doesn't put you in a position to harm yourself or damage yourself even more or damage somebody else and the worst thing you can do is bring someone else into your place of brokenness in order to make you feel good absolutely absolutely i if i'm to be honest i think augustus happened to be there at the wrong time he was at the wrong time he was there because he was introduced to them both and he wasn't um he was an acquaintance that's still needed that still had needs yes absolutely and she um and she she was in the wrong place too that's a big word that's a that's a big word but when it's said when you and i don't i don't i'm not trying to say anything bad about her because remember that she's still his wife and he still loves her yeah uh otherwise we wouldn't be here he wouldn't be asking he wouldn't be at this table i'm not but when you but we have to be honest about exploit i exploited his needs because i needed to feel needed i needed to feel good i needed to be a nurturer i needed i exploited his needs because of my needs i think that has a lot to do with my codependency codependency which is another thing that i had to learn to break in this cycle just that idea of needing to fix and being drawn to people that need help don't want to say too much but i do want to emphasize that my codependency needing to fix and being drawn to people who need help now i don't know their relationship but will does not strike me as a person who does not who needs help because he's had his he's his head strong as her so wait a minute here we go with that piece of i haven't been happy in such a long time how long probably since like you said since my kids left or because they also raised very independent children so they probably raised children that didn't need them as long as they likely would have if they hadn't as well but but also i think it's a mistake to label it as a codependency because there are just some people who are nurturers right and we just have to learn how to channel that effectively in a way that does not make us codependent right so it's i mean i guess it can become a codependency but i think for those of us who are nurturers and want to help people and want to fix people it's not a weakness as much as it is a strength you just haven't learned to control it and monitor it in a way that benefits you or or protects you i should say the problem with having an overt strength as a feminine being is that in many cases you deny your femininity and because you don't see jada as jada is a strong woman let's be real with this jada is a strong woman who was with a weak man i'm not saying weak as he's a weak individual he was weakened emotionally mentally he had troubles and so she wanted to fix you see what i'm saying that's so very important it's huge because there are women who are so independent listen independence is not a problem being strong is not a problem getting what you need to get paid is not a problem making as much as the man makes is not a problem because you good go out there and get your bag what i'm saying is is that when that becomes your stomping ground for so long mentally and emotionally you will [ __ ] yourself and the things that you may need as a feminine being as a feminine being yes and we cannot deny the femininity you can't deny that there is sex is set listen your sexuality your a a attraction to men and whatever the case may be is undeniable right fitting something receiving receiving good good receiving is undeniable doesn't it this has nothing to do with uh what gender you're attracted to what i'm saying is is receiving is undeniable so when you put yourself in that place of strength and she is strong and like i said they're both headstrong and i and i love them both dearly as far as their strength right um but there's a weakness there and if you don't address that weakness it will overcome you if you don't address it or if you continue to suppress it because you're trying to be something else yes yes this is just you can be holy feminine and a feminist at the same time right and there is a balance in learning how to be able to articulate your femininity while standing up for yourself as a feminist person and so it's just you have to make sure that you're not suppressing anything because then it bleeds and spills over into other areas like this where you did not realize there was something you needed right because you were trying to compete the goal is never to compete with the man it should be to just say i am equally as valuable as he is absolutely and these things sneak up on you see i'm not saying she didn't go through the pain i'm not saying that she didn't have the needs i'm saying it snuck up on her because she didn't think she needed it yes absolutely boom whether it's your health or whether it's your addictions there's something about that childhood trauma um that feels as though it can be fixed through fixing people versus fixing me yeah and i think that that whole process with all really showed me that and taught me that and i'm really grateful for that lesson i feel like that husband like i'm with you at the press conference now i got to be with you at the press conference while you like to tell the world about your transgressions like i love i love my baby i'ma stand by my baby no matter what well you know i definitely i definitely understand um why it would look that way or feel that way but i actually don't look at it as a transgression at all through that particular journey i learned so much about myself and was able to really confront a lot of emotional immaturity emotional insecurity and i was really able to do some really deep healing okay go ahead call the bs bus i called the bs bus i called the bs here's the thing though with that to say let's let's take a journey of when this first began i was dealing with and i brought somebody into our home into our life that was dealing with the lot who was sick and i helped him and i nursed him and then to say i was just looking for something to make me feel good because i hadn't felt good in a long time and then on the other side of that say i confronted a lot of my emotional insecurity and you see your mistakes but you do not call it a transgression a mistake is a transgression can you explain for the churchy and the non-cherty crowd what is a transgression transgression is just a um breaking of trust period that's what a transgression is um keep going are you talking no i want you to finish that uh it's a it's a breaking of trust and while they were not in a position to trust each other in that kind of sense it obviously hurt it obviously was a breaking of something and i think the breaking of trust came to be um where his name was sully he said i feel like the man who was with who has to support my woman his name was sully in in the midst of what she was doing and discreetly now here's an issue go ahead and finish your thought because i i need to i want to make this point and the only reason why and i get whether you and will have gotten through this and y'all call it a transgression between each other or not is one thing but i think they're talking about themselves as if it's just them in this scenario and first you have august who initially trusted you to help him through a situation and it turned and i don't know who made what move who did what but initially they were supposed to be a situation where you were helping someone and then for that to turn into a relationship only for you to then leave him broken and go back to your husband that is a transgression that is a break of trust right there yes then we don't know how your children dealt with this either right because he is the same age as trey okay and probably just a few years older than jaden so now you've broken a trust with as as as a parent that says now can i trust you around my friends right right that is in my opinion i feel like that is a transgression that you need to own up to and and need to work through as a grown person here's the problem okay what we do what she's doing and what we tend to do in order to save face again they've already dealt with this so we don't know how they dealt with it or what they've done to deal with it or whether there was any kind of interaction that was deeper than this right here of course we're only getting surface we're only getting surface because this is them owning the narrative but the thing is is that she's calling it a healing that's not a healing hmm tell him baby that's not a that's not a healing she's misdirecting healing is healing from a scar of being hurt this is a character development this is a character flaw this is an issue that i did of my own because i was weak in this area i'm sorry you see what i'm saying yes this is where she needed to be that's good and when you cover correction with healing then what you're doing is you're not taking accountability which we talked about earlier is why he was calling her out in the first place what did you do why did you need this what do you think about this now the thing about will i what i really love about him is because i know that those aren't just questions to call her out or whatever or to clear his name he's not being totally selfish he's asking those clear points in order to make it clear for the public that hey you were going through some things and he and he loves her through that he loved her and and that's powerful but at the end of the day knowing this hearing this listen if i'm with my wife and and we break apart and come back together knowing what you did while we broke apart is going to be an issue unless we walk through it and deal with it together what you did and and we're going to be honest they seem they strike me as very honest people i'm going to tell you you hurt me by doing that yeah and if doing that you did it because there were weaknesses in you then certainly that deserves some level of accountability because if you never take accountability for those weaknesses are they really even fixed are they really even healed or are they really even corrected because we're all human we're all going to be weak we're all going to be broken we're all going to have these same hungers you see what i'm saying so what do we do with those hungers we look at them and say this hunger i can no longer abide by you see what i'm saying yes that's good okay yes yeah i i don't like the idea that she's not taking responsibility the very first thing she did you said you said you saw the defensiveness or the ability the the posture of what do you mean or the posture of okay let me get ready you saw that earlier um and now she's taking words and she's redefining them redefining that's a good yes so it fits her narrative about her to the public you know and as i came through and started to realize certain things about you and i he decided break all communication with me right which was totally understandable right um and i let that be and hadn't talked so she's saying as i be is she saying what you said earlier as i began to go back to my husband he was hurt so he broke all communication the boy what he did was i'm sorry i don't mean to call him a boy what the young man did was in his 20s he was a boy in his lower younger 20s he was a boy right i'm trying to respect the parties i'm sorry but what he did was he did um no contact he did yes and you do no contact with people who abuse you you do no contact with people who hurt you you're doing no contact and here's the thing and here's how you you're right there was a young man there was a boy in there because he didn't pursue he was looking for like how can i make this stop hurting because an older man a stronger man would pursue like look it's mine you feel me yeah i know exactly what that's like you understand what i'm saying so the idea he's stupid so the idea is is that he's hurt now yeah because she found herself she found her fulfillment and now she's looking back at the man that she really sees as a man and and that's the thing she's looking now to the men that she really sees as a man and she said oh he broke all communication and i feel like there was something left in there that she's not mentioning it's so brushed off yeah like uh he broke our which he was perfectly you know understood to do i understand but really what you're not saying is that you dismissed the wreckage that you left behind you and went back to what was comfortable to you and that's how it got out and that's what happens that's how it got out when you go through something like this and they still have it sounds like they still both have an affinity for the guy ugg they call him mog right when you go through something like this you have to have um a reconciliation with him because if not he's left out there and he's talking and he's trying to save himself and this is how these kind of things get out this is not no ordinarily ordinary infidelity yeah it's not it's not because he's i don't know what kind of person august is what i do know is that he was hurt before he left him or before he met him and he got hurt after her you see what i'm saying ready yes so it is a little weird that all this stuff is coming out now since this was yeah because for me this was years ago right you know so the fact that it's uh coming up now and i think it could feel weird for people that we're laughing and and talking about it but it happened so long ago you know and our experiences of working through it fighting through it talking through it and therapizing right through it i think that the why now is weird yeah when i say it's been a huge healing on my life and just what i had to confront and discover yeah you know he hasn't wanted to you know og and i haven't talked in so long you know what i mean so i don't know this this this all seemed very strange you know but i'm just but don't try to paint it like he's an opportunity there's no journey that you and i have had together because i feel like they're would you say i said but don't try to paint it like he's an opportunist like she said it's very strange it's all of the sudden it's very strange which i get it's all the sudden it's very strange but also don't paint it in a picture as if he's just being opportunistic either just like just less and i think that's where it's coming off a little bit disingenuous to me right and a little bit selfish because you're taking this i've learned so much about myself rode and and it's just you're really not leaving any level of but i also realized i might have effed up a little boy's life a young man's life it's almost like taking a higher road in a very condescending way yes that's exactly it and that's a perfect word so thank you oh you got it a lot of couples that go through those periods and a lot of couples that have to separate and i think it's over and you know the one thing i'll say about you and i is that there's never been secrets right we came together uh young and we were both broken in our own ways and to be able to make mistakes without the fear of losing your family is so critical yeah it's the idea of any relationship and trying to get to deeper understanding of love is going to be forged in fire yeah there's no what will said is very powerful and very resilient revealing the ability to make mistakes without losing your family without the fear of losing yourself the fear of losing yeah now i'm not going to say because there's a lot of speculation there's a lot of gossip there's a lot of um presupposition i don't want to have anything to do with that because they're not speaking on that but what i am saying is that the ability to make mistakes without the fear of losing your family is huge because it speaks towards his value regardless of what he did it says that he may may have made some mistakes too absolutely and he's going through that he's talking about that a little bit we're picking that up but then she goes back to personal growth and let me just be clear the ability to make mistakes does not make making mistakes a necessary thing right the ability to make mistakes means that we're going to be committed but beyond this um but in order to be committed beyond this i need to know who you are in this and beyond this yeah you see what i'm saying and so i think it's very important again they just said therapies and stuff like that so maybe they went through therapy and maybe they have a clear understanding of who each other are and i i could kind of get that but for public consumption i'm not seeing enough accountability one of the things that i'm deeply grateful in this whole process between you and i is that we have really gotten to that new place of unconditional love because i wasn't sure i was ever going to speak to you again i know i know yeah like the fact that i'm speaking to you again it's a miracle that means he was hurt by it he was hurt by it or by whatever they went through during that particular point in time because you know he just wasn't done i think it was more towards this but you know we're not we don't get have a clarity yeah but i'm saying he looks he looks cool now but you can you can see the body language and and certain things that this is still not comfortable for him to have to talk about because and this is one thing i'm very interested in if i were able to sit down and talk to will smith as a man i think he'd be very interested in seeing how he healed from that pain i think it's important because i trust him uh in the sense of just haven't heard him talk before i trust him to be honest about number one it hurts number two you don't just get over it number three but this is how i got through it you see what i'm saying it's very important for us to really understand i think as a guiding individual like that he is to to help other men to see how he got through that kind of pain it ain't for the week at heart there's just certain things that you have to go through and it's like and i wish that's very true you know i wish that wasn't the case i do that wasn't the case i sure wish it could be all magic and miracles yeah you got to go through some to get the answers that's true you know and i'm just happy because i definitely believe that you and i we never ever ever thought that we would make it back yeah there's a real power in the just knowing somebody's riding with you no matter what yeah and you really can't know that until you go through through some stuff you know i don't want to go through this no more yeah no i don't either yeah you see that i don't want to go through this no more listen look at like mess up if you want to listen i can't go through this no more that hurt that hurt and that that was him saying that hurt me right like i don't want to go through this no more so i would love to know dear will i would love to know that she said i wouldn't i won't take you through this no more i'm sorry i'm sorry that i did it not not that i wish it didn't have to be this way not ambiguous or big or fluffy but i wish i had not have done it and i wish i had not have done it to you perhaps that happened behind closed doors and they got to that understanding again they're good people as far as their strength of mind is concerned but i would have liked to see that because that's necessary for other women to to understand women who cheated on their men that's necessary for men to see because men peek in on this kind of stuff man so many men are talking about this stuff they ain't gossiping but it's necessary for men i see a whole lot of men coming through well i've seen a few men coming through and really championing the staying of them together through this and i think it's because you have a lot more men probably who have had to sit on the other side of this than not right and so i see i've seen several men like yeah you gotta go through some things yeah like will and jada said it ain't for the weekend and faint at heart like absolutely but you shouldn't have to go through these things you don't have to you will because you're immature and your character needs improvement just like jada said hers was and she didn't say it like that though she said she was immature well she yeah i mean she's immature but i would like her beauty just to be honest i would like her to be more i feel like there's no yeah there's no lamenting right there's no lamenting again i understand what you and will got through y'all got you know a great relationship with truth and honesty and transparency absolutely i just still feel like there are other and again what you do with your kids is none of my business and even august made it our business thank you but like you know but from that perspective there just seems to be like there is such an arrogant bend to i've done this and i've accomplished this and i did this that there's no like real a i really messed up right they missed the opportunity to make their marriage relationship goals or she missed it because she's not addressing it directly i just feel like if you're going to do this for public consumption make it and make it a learning account yeah make it a learning opportunity for others to see how we can get through this rather than for protecting yourself or your ego your image yeah i'm gonna get you back first and then you're gonna get me back i think you've got me back i think you've i think we're good on that okay okay might that's probably true and i don't think it's about getting anybody back no for me it is okay um i'll give you that teddy you see that and he didn't say just kidding but they laughed but you know i will definitely say it's just part of it yeah you know if you expect to be with somebody for a lifetime 25 years and counting 25. we ride together we gotta go together bad marriage for life i didn't think that was bad like i thought that was actually pretty cute so everybody's like like oh my god i saw it on my timeline too that's a play on bad boys it's a play on bad boys we know that just it probably wasn't the best timing i told you the first year we were married what did you tell me that i can love you through anything and i didn't believe you yeah if somebody looked through a crystal ball and said this this this and this is going to happen i'll be like no way yeah you thought i was that that i didn't have the girth that it was going to take to write i did yeah i didn't know if you would be willing to find the deep capacity to love me i don't like her laying it up on him i do appreciate that he says i will love you through anything and girth is kind of a weird word weird word will but uh it's a masculine word so we'll give you that but at the same time the idea that i did not know that you would have what it takes to love me we're refocusing the issue upon his capacity rather than her ability to be lovable amen you see what i'm saying yep regardless of his capacity it does not excuse the ability there are people in switch situations women who have the capacity to love and have loved and are loving right now abusive men who do not have the ability to love them back that's not a kudos to her that's a shame on him you see what i'm saying right so it's reinforcing that idea of you gotta love somebody through the hell forget the high water like love them through the hell regardless of whether or not they are lovable right and if they're if they're loving you in a way that warrants you to love them through that hell it's just another sign of inaccountability we see it so many with males it's very very struggle love it's very rare that we see it with with a woman who who in in a very pr type of way or very image branding type of way will not re receive that or accept the accountability again just to be fair public consumption we have no idea what accountability she should see accept it privately but i but if you hurt me you need to know that you hurt me address that you hurt me acknowledge that you hurt me and don't do it again let me ask you a question before we end this before we end this sure 37 seconds 37 seconds okay but after this because now you've walked through something that basically reopened old wounds i would imagine that in reopening those ovals there may be some tension because now you got to see the meme that's basically this basically like tearing up your manhood you've got to see the memes that's not painting your wife or your husband in a certain way yeah how then does the couple get through the recurrence like because now it's like it's an aftershock and the aftershock sometimes is just as hard as the original earthquake well the good news is that they're already celebrities so they've been through a lot of the they they have tough skin they have thick skin and that's what they're going to have to ride on is that thick skin you know what i mean don't pr your marriage be merry you see what i'm saying that's the best you can do but you're just gonna have to have thick skin through it i mean it it'll go away eventually unless it's like the jordan meme you know what i mean yes um it will go away it will not be headlines um later this year we are voting so you know there's other there are greater more um more important things that are that are way bigger than this and i think people have had a people have had too less of a life to really be fixated on jada and will um i don't mean to be smacking anybody's hands uh we're taking the time to look at this because we're curious and we wanted to look at it in a fair way right um because i didn't like everything that was going on across my timeline but i wasn't going to just argue with anybody because i haven't talked to these people all i can do is is observe and see what i'm seeing but at the end of the day thick skin thick skin will it hurt absolutely thick skin doesn't mean you don't get hit what it means is is you don't let the hit knock you down that's good that's all that means that's great so you know they're going to have to do that i love it that makes perfect sense you want to finish this or you no i think we're good i think we can end it here um and say hey listen if you guys want us to do more of these leave a comment let us know and we might do some more if we can get kenyan to agree to it all right we're kenyon and takara martin and you just watched a clip from our podcast the soul ties podcast if you want to hear more the link to the full episode is below in the description have a relationship question that you want answered leave a comment below and your question could be featured on our next live and don't forget to subscribe and hit the bell so you don't miss any future episodes thanks again for watching we'll see you in the next video

Channel: Ask The Martins

Views: 70,781

Keywords: jada pinkett smith, red table talk, jada pinkett smith red table talk, jada entanglement, jada pinkett smith august alsina red table talk, jada pinkett smith august alsina, will smith entanglement, will smith and jada pinkett smith red table

Id: _FflNRCVF6M

Length: 49min 23sec (2963 seconds)

Published: Tue Jul 14 2020