- We love every car here at
Donut, it's kind of our thing. But let's face it, not every single car is super exciting on paper. But sometimes, car manufacturers
go full Jonathon ham and decide to make some
seriously hotdogged-up versions of their most bassist base-god model. Strap on your Old Navy polo and your fastest pair of Oakley's, 'cause this is the list
of the coolest versions of the most boring cars. This is-- - [Announcer] D-List. (crashing sound) ♪ Cobalt SS ♪ - We're starting off this list with the mid 2000s Chevy. The mid 2000s was a time when American car manufacturers were shook from all these front wheel
drive, Japanese tuner cars, taking a bite out of the U.S. market. Like other manufacturers at
the time, Chevy clapped back! A hot version of their otherwise, less than exciting, front
wheel drive, Cobalt. Enter, Nolan's dream car,
the Cobalt Super Sport. This... (raspy breathing) This sport compact commuter
budded in late 2004. Initially making 205 HRSPRS from a supercharged, two liter, four-bang boy. The only transmission it came with was a soft design, five speed manual, which I think is pretty cool. But years later, in 2008, Chevy dropped a better Cobalt SS with a turbo charged 2.4 liter
ecotech, making 260 HP! Cobalt's got a lot of
love from enthusiast, and one auto journalist even called it, "The best sport compact car
ever made by general motors "and a potential future classic." And how could it not be? It's got a fricking boost
gauge on the A pillar and two-toned leather bucket seats straight out of freaking Pep Boys. Bet you could put on an Abercrombie shirt, blast some Hoobastank so loud in this car and just make all the girls
in the dELiA*s catalog lose their minds with how cool you are. (crashing sound) ♪ VW Golf Country ♪ I'm going to be honest with you. A lot of you guys know I'm a
huge Golf stanley, all right? The car, not the sport. Truth is, the base model
Golf has always been, you know, kind of a whatever car. It's an Econobox, that's it. It's a cool one! It's a cool Econobox, but
an Econobox nonetheless. My Golf... (laughs) Put down 57 horsepower to
the wheels for Peter's sake. You can't do much with that,
believe me, I've tried. Gimme GTI, talking maybe an R32, Golf R. It's fricking on Daddy-O. All of these are sick
versions of the Golf. But they are not my pick for this list because they are not the craziest one. My pick is the Volkswagen Golf Country. Do you like your Golf's with
bull bars and skid plates? Because you're in for a treat brother. This gussied up Mark Two was made for medium off-road driving. What does that even mean? We talking little baby dunes? It has an improved ground
clearance of 8.3 inches, a long travel suspension,
and synchro all wheel drive. The Gulf Country was
pretty off-road capable with the standard eight-valve golf engine that made 97 tough ponies. But this wasn't about HRSPRS, off-roading's not about HRSPRS. It's about bull-bars. And this one came with not
only front and rear bull-bars, just in case you run into a bull, and then back up into another bull. It also had little bull-bars
on the headlights, okay? Look at these bull bars.
(heavy metal music) These are the cutest little
bull bars I've ever seen. (crashing sound) ♪ Trailblazers SS ♪ - Chevy's from the mid 2000s, again, were nothing to write home about. Unless your mom's name is Chevy, and you were writing to ask her for a few thousand bucks for some sick bass-wood devil sticks with
premium leather tassels. Trust me. No one was waiting in line to
buy a base level trailblazer. But... In 2006... Chevy decided to have a little fun and slap a "SS" badge on the old off-duty cop wagon. Because let's be absolutely 100% real. Only people who look like off-duty cops drive trailblazers. Under the hood, the Trailblazer SS got the six liter LS2
motor that was standard in the fricking Corvettes at the time. It had a better diff for a better launch and came in rear wheel drive versions so you can just freaking rip donies all... Day... Long... This car is made for donuts. Apparently, it also handles pretty well. Just like other notable
trailblazers, the Donner party, this thing eats up track like
it's fricking human meat. The Trailblazer SS was
the first time Chevy put the SS badge on an SUV. Proving the point, they can
look like an off duty cop, but still drive like an on-duty cop. (crashing sound) ♪ Fiat 500 Abarth ♪ - The next car comes from
the shoe shaped country where the streets are lined with spaghet and puppets are liars. Talking about Pinocchio. He's Italian. It's not a huge part of the story, but that's where he lives. Lots of very powerful, very
vascular cars come from Italy, but neither of those words
correctly describe the Fiat 500. Although it's cute... and comes in a bunch of the
cutest colors you've ever seen and looks like a cute, little, tiny bug. It's not known for being
super fun to drive. But luckily, Abarth got their greasy nux all over these cars. Abarth 500s come all hotted
up straight from the dealer. They've got a lower ride height. They got a five-speed
manual, a fricking turbo. All in a car, the size
of a large dollhouse. Literally, I could probably
park one of these sideways in my second largest doll house, Fiat 500 Abarth's turbo charge four-pump, makes 160 HRS in a car that
weighs just over 2,500 pounds. Which means you can whip it around and zoom, zoom, zoom all day
long and have a blast doing it. Max used to own one, and when we reached out
to him for a comment, he sent his lawyers
after us threatening to, "Sue the pants off of us if
we put him in another video." You edit the videos, Max, you
put yourself in the video. So either stop doing that or
stop suing the pants off of us. But after months of back and forth, we did get an official letter from his secretary that stated, "The sound was my favorite part "of driving the Abarth. "With an emphasis on the pops and bang." This car has got a lot of pops and bangs and such a great sound. It sounds like a motorcycle. It's because it didn't have a muffler. The turbo is the muffler. The goat version is
the Abarth 695 Biposto. Which means, two sauces. This version gets the
power bump to 186 HRSPRS, and drops the weight down
to an incredible 2,198 lbs. Making it the fastest Abarth ever made. I'm gonna win. (crashing sound) ♪ VW Beetle RSi ♪ - When the New Beetle
came out in the late 90s, people went goo-goo dolls over it. The people's car was cute, but after a while you started
seeing them everywhere. And eventually it was like, "Ah! "Get these bugs out of my eyes!" "Get these bugs out of my eyes!" They did come out with a few very cool variants of the New Beetle. I'm talking the Turbo
S, I really liked them. And they also did a turbo diesel version, if you want to roll cool while you're looking
like a cute little bug. But... What if none of those models
get your wattle wiggling? What if you want to spend $80,000 on a beetle that isn't a Porsche? Well, you're in luck
because Volkswagen made a few super hot versions called... The Beetle RSi. This bug had the 3.2
liter VR6 out of the R32. One of my favorite engines of all time! Putting out 221 buff vascular HRS. It also had a Remus exhaust,
the six speed manual, and four motion all wheel drive. All of that makes for a very sick Beetle. But unfortunately, they only
made 250 of these fat bugs. So you're probably not even gonna see one, let alone drive one. Guess I'll just keep driving my take one. (crashing sound) ♪ Saturn Vue Redline ♪ A Saturn on the list? Are you pulling my chain, Pumphrey? No. The only time I pull chains
is when I'm flushing. One of my many, priceless, antique, high-tank, chain pole toilets. The Saturn Vue is one
of those mid 2000s cars that looked futuristic when it came out, but seeing it now, it's
like seeing a picture of yourself when you were a kid and you thought that you
looked so cool at the time, but 15 years later, and you're like, "Yikes, what was I thinking?" Base Saturn Vue either came with a dinky little four cylinder
making 143 horsepower or on a Nemic GMV6, making 181 HRSPRS. But under the hood of
the Saturn Vue Redline, lay the 3.5 liter V6 from the Honda pilot. All right? This car has Vtech. The 24 valve dual
overhead cam Honda engine with 250 HRSPRS was quite a
step in the right direction. All in a compact crossover package. Plus you get Vtech sounds from an SUV. Plus it was made on fricking Saturn. That's the only planet with decorations. It looks like basketball
going through hoops. And no, I do not consider
moons to be decorations, because moons are a planet's pets. (crashing sound) ♪ Dodge Omni GLH ♪ We've talked a little bit about
the Dodge Omni GLH before. If you want, you can check out our episode on Carroll Shelby. I will link to it at
the end of this video. It's one of my favorites. I'm pretty sure I cry in it. But in the early 1980s,
Dodge had this dainty little front wheel drive
hatchback called, the Omni. And it was... So slow. So Lee Iacocca brought his friend, Carol Shelby in, and Shelby was like, "Let me, let me get my
greasy knucks on it." And Dodge was like, "Sure, dude, "anytime you get your knucks
greasy, it's good stuff." And so they made a car
with maybe the coolest name of the 80s, the Dodge Omni GLH. Which stood for, Goes Like Hell. Shelby bumped the HRSPRS in
this 2,200 pound baby bunny from under 100, to up to
142, using the turbo charge 2.2 liter engine from the Shelby charger. But it was the last 500 of these that are really, the really cool ones. The Dodge Omni, GLHS. Which stood for Goes Like Hell Some More. They bumped the power up to 176 HRSPRS. It had explosive acceleration,
tons of torque steer, and amazing braking due to low weight, and drove like a Barbie Jeep that those Grind Hard
Plumbing Co guys made. Which is the opposite of boring. Those Grind Hard guys probably know all about my antique,
top-tank, chain-pole toilets. And we are looking for a toilet sponsor for our new office space, so hit us up. (crashing sound) ♪ Rambler Rebel ♪ This next car is... Old. I didn't even want to put
it on my sacred D-list. I don't know anything
about these old 50s cars. So I'm going to throw it to a resident hunky muscle car
boyfriend, Nolan Jay Sykes, because I feel like he's the only one who can really do this car justice. And if we're in a video together, it kind of feels like we're hanging out. - Nash is a company from
a long, long time ago. They used to make this
car called the Rambler, which was an Econobox
that was made and sold for super cheap to help the U.S. get out of the postwar slump. And it did just that. The Rambler sold like hotcakes. And that's saying a lot because hotcakes were one of the only foods
invented at the time. The base rambler came with
an 82 horsepower straight six that could do zero to 60
in 21 seconds. (laughter) But in 1956, they threw a 190 horsepower, big block V8, from the
much larger Nash ambassador into the compact rambler, and made what is arguably
the first muscle car. Back to you, James. (crashing sound) ♪ Toyota Tacoma X-Runner ♪ - This one is a little bit of a stretch because I wouldn't consider
the base Tacoma to be boring. So I guess what I'm trying to
say is this is a cool truck. It's a cooler version of
an already cool truck. I digress. This truck is xtreme. And you know it, because there's an X. And it's not experimental
or extreme if you use the E. This thing has got the
same 236 HRSPRS engine as other Tacomas. But it also came chock full
of tasty little goodies, and sweets, and treats
that make it a really cool cat Daddy-O. It's got Bilstein shocks,
it's got a limited slip. It's got a six speed manual and... a freaking hood scoop. And apparently, this X-runner
thing could outperform a Cadillac XLR in slalom
and breaking tests. All right? An XLR, that's like Detroit's
version of the Corvette. (crashing sound) ♪ Supercharged Toyota Previa ♪ Look, I hate to do two Toyotas
in a row, but let's face it. Toyota makes a lot of really cool cars, but they also make a ton
of really boring cars. And a lot of really cool
versions of those boring cars. I own the fun version of a boring Toyota. This is one of the reasons
that Toyota is successful. But let me ask you a question. When you think of European Supercars, what do you think of? Probably think mid-engine, forced induction, all wheel drive. What if I told you I wasn't describing a Bugatti or a McLaren. But rather, a Japanese egg van, Privia SC. SC stands for supercharged
made 158 buff horse eggs. Improvement of 23 horsepower
from the stock Previa. Supercharged van! Cool, you say. But here's the kickler. That supercharged engine is sandwiched between the
axles, making this egg van a mid engine rocket ship. So if you live in the 90s, and you got to take a bunch of your kids and their friends to pop punk
band practice or something, you'd be hard pressed to find
a cooler egg van to do it in. (crashing sound) ♪ Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution ♪ Wow! Here we are at number one. How time flies. Feels like we were just at
number six a few minutes ago. You guys probably saw this coming. There was no way that we're
going to get through this list without mentioning the
Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution. For 10... For nine generations, this car dominated rally championships, street races, and our hearts. It is one of the most
iconic cars in history. But what you probably forget about, is that the Evo is based on a completely sensible commuter car. The regular old Lancey Boy. And at some point we got
it here as the Mirage. This car, we'll call him Lance, is the nerd that was
picked on in high school that grew up to be a yoked billionaire. When the first Evo came out in 1992, the base Lancer was a front
wheel drive grocery-getter that made like 100 horsepower. But, the Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution kicked it up to 244 HRSPRS and ditched the front wheel drive for all the wheels drive baby. The Evo's iconic 4G63
engine can be modified to make tons more power. If you can figure out
what's been described to me as the tuning voodoo of an Evo, there are ton of examples
that make well over 1000 horsepower from a four banger boy. Do you know how insane that is? And once you add that all wheel drive, the big old fenders, the
hood scoop, the big wing. This is a completely different
car than the stock Lancer. But you don't need me to
tell you how sick the Evo is. Check out our episode
of Up To Speed on it. Thank you for watching Donut Media. If you liked it, hit that subscribe button and that notification bell. Want to learn more about the Evo? Check out this episode of Up To Speed. You want to learn more
about Carroll Shelby and the Omni GLHS? Good luck high school. Check out this episode of Up To Speed. I love you. (clapping)
