Consequences of Over Protected Children- Jordan Peterson

[Music] most children now have older parents right because people aren't having children until they're in their 30s and there's a big difference between having a parent who's in his or her 30s and having a parent who's in her 20s yep that the 20 year olds are still kind of like kids and they're going to be more usefully neglectful I would say well look wonder one of the things we used to do with my daughter when she was very little was you know well she was about a year and a half is we have her in a room alone and she would usually complain about that for a few minutes and then she'd find a way to amuse herself you know she she liked to take books out of shelves and put them back in and like if if you let her be get through that initial bit of misery then she would learn how to regulate herself and and she got very good at that and then so that's a good example of minor privation having a positive influence but you know children used to have multiple siblings and siblings toughen you up because there's tremendous competition in families amongst siblings and they had younger parents who had fewer resources and you know now parents are older first of all and second they're more resource rich and so they're more likely to schedule their children to death in some sense to provide them with all the opportunities that they feel would be useful and that's understandable and plus because they have fewer children each child is in some sense more precious you know not like if you have ten children you don't love all of them but you know there's ten of them there's there's only so much excess attention that can go around and they do a lot of socializing each other rather than being socialized by parents but if you only have one child you know you're gonna devote all your resources to providing them with absolutely everything you can provide them with and one of the dangers of that is that you'll over protect them and you'll provide them with too much and we don't understand those Amyx right we don't understand how much you should stay hands off your kids and let them go out there and make their own mistakes and and find their own way and and that's that's well that's tricky and and we're ignorant about it and so I think one of the consequences of that is that we do have a reasonable percentage of young people maybe young adolescents the kind that you hear about at University who have been over protected and over skinned over scheduled and under challenged in some sense and so they're not very resilient and that's and then of course what's happening in the universities the safe spaces and the trigger warnings and all of that there's good recent research on this trigger warnings clearly make things worse rather than than better we extend that overprotection far longer than is helpful you know it's hard though because as I said when you have resources you can use them to make your children's lives let's say easier but the question is like do you really want to make the life of someone you love easier and that's an incredibly difficult question

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Id: Ll0opgJ9_Ck

Length: 3min 26sec (206 seconds)

Published: Thu Aug 08 2019