Choose Life! The Greatest Motivational Speech of All Time

when god created the world out of nothing he had to produce he had to invent he had to create existence nothing existed he had to make things exist what does it mean that something exists what does it mean this is it means it occupies space to exist means to occupy space that's the scientific definition everything in this universe exists because it takes up space if it doesn't take up space it doesn't exist even a thought in your head takes up space that's why when you're thinking you are your mind is occupied emotion takes up space your heart is full of course it's emotional space which means when you have an emotion another emotion cannot come into that same space when you have a thought in your head you can't have another thought in that same space you have a book on the shelf you can't put another book in that place the book occupies its space so everything shares the same existence water fire stones thoughts feelings everything exists by this definition it occupies space another thing about existence is that it has many conditions to exist you have many conditions a person has enough to eat enough to drink had a good night's sleep has a secure home a roof over his head has friends a support system he has everything and what does that result in an existence in order to exist you have to eat you have to drink you need a house you need clothing you need security you need friends you need and when you have all of that you exist which means you continue to take up space then god gave all existing things a life the life of fire is not the same as the life of water although they exist the same way life means the effect you have on your surrounding the contribution you make to the rest of the world that's life the contribution of fire it gives warmth light makes things come apart the life of water it makes things grow keeps things cool and makes things stick together that's its life the life of a stone it gives stability a house made out of stone is stronger than a house made out of straw as we all know from non-kosher sources a human being exists and has a life only the human being is conscious of his life it's not automatic and instinctive it's conscious now sometimes there's a conflict between my existence and my life because some things are better for my existence not so good for my life some things are good for my life not so good for my existence for example the fact that you're all here in this room if i was here alone i would have the whole room to myself and my existence would be rather large this would be my space but you come into the room and you destroy it you ruin my existence because you know how much existence can you have if you're sharing the space with 100 people so i hate you it's not nice what you're doing to my existence on the other hand i'm really glad you're here because speaking to an empty room is not a life so the fact that you're here my life is better but the fact that you're here my existence is ruined and we're not even married can you imagine what marriage is in the vows under the chupa we need to be a little more specific we need to spell it out when a man marries a woman or a woman marries a man it should be very clear it should be explicitly stated you are my chosen one of all the people in the world of all the possibilities in the world i choose you to be the one person who will ruin my existence i don't want anybody else ever to ruin my existence because what happens people get married and two weeks later the guy is complaining i feel a little cramped i need i need room i'm suffocating say ah you see i should have spelled it out the vows have to be more specific actually there's a comedian who says i never understood why at a wedding the bride wears a bridal gown nobody else at the wedding is dressed like the bride but the groom is wearing a tuxedo like every other guy they rent it all in the same place why is that yes i figured it out by listening to the vows did you hear the vows that they make do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband this man they don't mention her name because if she says no okay fine um he's dressed come do you take this man no come on there's got to be somebody you like see you got to be more specific so sometimes existing and living are in conflict what should i do when they're in conflict should i sacrifice my existence or should i sacrifice life oh what kind of question is that of course you sacrifice existence why who needs it you take up space that's it you're gonna fight over that if your spouse needs more space give it away humility in jewish thinking is never deprecation of life we never entertain the thought that life is meaningless god forbid a moment of life is infinitely precious the humility is humble your existence you're proud that you take up space what is that you have a right to take up space and then demand all sorts of resources just so that you can continue taking up space humble it don't do that it deserves to be humbled it doesn't have any value so if you thought if you think every song is about you your existence is out of control you've spread yourself way too far and you have to occupy every thought every song has to be about you reign it in too much in fact that's what depression is you see existing is a little bit depressing by its very nature it's depressing and it's embarrassing so uh what have you been doing lately taking up space i do it very well nobody takes up space like i do it's embarrassing like a lump on the log and by the way let's spell it out what does it mean i take up space it means you can't come into my space get out of my seat i was here first this town ain't big enough for the two of us you know who said that kane said that to abel there were two human beings in the whole world and they said no no it's either me or you one of us got to go it's embarrassing and it's a little depressing because it's so it's so burdensome just just to exist you got to eat you got to sleep and if you don't eat the right foods and if you don't drink the right things and if you don't sleep on your left side on your right side with your had elevated on a sleep mattress on an air mattress oh god this is so burdensome so depression means if you add weight to your existence by worrying about it by fighting over it by by making it important you're making it heavier and at some point your existence becomes so heavy that you can't carry it anymore and your very existence crushes you like a ton of bricks and you can't make a phone call and you can't get out of bed you your existence is way too heavy the solution is live put energy into living not into existing it's a seesaw it's an amazing thing when you put energy into living you don't need to put so much energy into existing when you put energy into your existence you have no energy for life and that's why it's often very helpful when a person is depressed to simply say to them stop cletching find somebody who has real problems and help them and that is so curing it's good so in that seesaw we should always sacrifice the existence in favor of the life in simple words existing means i have needs life means do you have any needs can i be helpful to you existing means my needs life means who needs me what am i needed for what effect what contribution can i make outside of myself the previous debut said what does love feel like all the poets have been trying forever to describe love the previous ever said love is like this you're walking down the street burdened with your problems heavy heavy you're dragging your feet because you got so many problems and they're so heavy and then without without expecting you meet somebody you love your burdens are not so heavy your burdens lighten up it's fine because you met somebody you love life is buoyant it carries you existence is dead weight you have to carry it and it gets heavy so the solution is choose life this is the secret to our survival the other nations that made a vast noise what did they want what were they trying to accomplish they wanted to guarantee their own existence that the sun should never set on their empire so they built these fortified cities they created these huge armies they amassed great wealth to guarantee their continued existence and they're gone don't exist at all i was in rome trying to get to the airport and if you've been there you know the pedestrians don't let cars move so that the taxi is sitting there stuck not in traffic but in in pedestrians so i said to the taxi driver i said you know these romans are going to make me miss my flight he says these are not romans there are no romans the only people who are still here from those days are the jews that's so true the romans are gone there are no romans why because they tried so hard to exist that they killed themselves we had a different history remember in the torah it says that just before the jews entered the promised land moshe gave them a pep talk remember the pep talk he said let me tell you what lies ahead you're going to come into the land you're going to get comfortable and you're going to get thrown out you're going to be scattered to the four corners of the earth you'll be diminished to a fraction of your number you will be unwelcome guests in other people's countries they will pursue you they will kill you they will torture you you're going to be starving you're going to be confused you won't know what tomorrow brings and the people said is there a point to this what are you telling us and moshe said forget about existence live focus on be busy living because an existence you're not gonna have don't even think about it so that's what our history has been we barely exist but we are so alive in the times when our existence was literally down to the final hair thread we produce the greatest saints the greatest saddiquim the greatest scholars the greatest books the greatest social structures charitable organizations we were so alive and we barely existed even today we barely exist ask any member in the united nations have you ever heard of a jewish state in the middle east never heard of it it's not on the map doesn't exist what do they talk about every day at the united nations how much trouble the jews are causing how israel is messing everything up for a nation that doesn't exist we're pretty loud but that's been our history so you see if you don't put a lot of energy into your existence but you're busy living the existence somehow just takes care of itself this is why people have been asking for 5 000 years why are we here see every human being with a little bit of sensitivity is embarrassed by their own existence i mean this is it i take up space and that's it there's got to be more to it than that there must be i take up space then i make demands give me food give me this give me that i need i need i deserve i have to have and then what and then i can take up space now god this is embarrassing so every decent human being asks why are we here which in different words is why do i exist and we ask that question because existing doesn't justify itself it doesn't add up to anything okay like the bumper sticker life stinks and then you die but the mistake is don't confuse existence with life the bumper sticker should say existence stinks life never stinks and that's where we get really confused when instead of asking why are we here we ask what is the purpose of life oh you're confused the question is what is the purpose of existence the answer is life life is the answer not the question don't get confused so what does it mean i love you but i don't like you oh it's so obvious i love you because you're giving me a life i don't like you because you've ruined my existence so what so so how do we resolve that very simple ruin my existence go right ahead i'll be busy living i'll be busy living what is death life does not die that's an oxymoron it's like salt can't go bad well like the comedian says how does sour cream go bad life can't go life can't die life lives that's what it is life is alive dead is dead death means a person had a life and an existence and the existence ended doesn't take up space anymore does not need to eat doesn't need to drink so what's left life life continues it doesn't know what else to do it only has one talent life knows how to live that's it so when a person's existence is over his life is relieved now i don't have to share my energy now i don't have to go on this on the seesaw of sh should i put my energy in my existence should i try living now it's pure life the only problem is that life is not here because to be here you have to take up space so where is this life in the in the world of life this earth the physical plane is the world of existence to be here you have to exist and take up space hey this is what's wrong with teenagers if you ask any teenager anywhere in the world what are you angry about and they'll tell you they all say exactly the same words in every language in the world my mother ruined my whole life it's ruined my whole my whole life but that's ridiculous first of all life can't be ruined thank you life can't be ruined life only comes in one flavor and that's delicious existence can be ruined i mean people have terrible existences very sad very painful and some people have a very comfortable existence but life only comes in one flavor you can't ruin life life means whatever is going on and whatever your existence might be you have an opportunity to make a difference to make a contribution to do something how can you ruin that the second reason that mothers don't ruin teenagers lives is because teenagers don't have a life [Music] teenagers have an existence and it's not even theirs like this teenage girl who says i can't believe it my mother went into my room your room what are you paying rent it's not your room it's a room your mother lets you sleep in my mother went through my things your things nothing there belongs to you see but they get confused instead of saying my mother ruined my whole life they should be saying my mother ruined my whole existence and that's true mothers ruin your existence and not maliciously they can't help it when an important guy who owns the whole town or the whole island it's all his space he is the king he is the ruler he is top hancho and he's sitting at the most important meeting conducting the whole world his existence is enormous and his mother walks in i know i know where does my existence come from you carried me for nine months and i know you're right i owe you my existence mothers ruin your existence you see this is why you have to honor your mother honoring parents literally the mitzvah one of the ten commandments how do you fulfill that mitzvah by adoring them by sending them a card on mother's day you fulfill the mitzvah of honoring parents by doing menial tasks for them so that they don't have to do it you carry their bags you bring the food to the table you ease their burden and make their existence easier by giving up a little of your existence so in the ten commandments god says honor your father and mother and you will live when you give up a little of your existence for somebody else's existence now you're starting to have a life now you're alive when you take a dollar bill that's good for your existence and you give it to someone who needs it more to help with their existence what do you have life now you're alive shabbos god tells us six days of the week you should work but on the seventh day do no labor which means basically for six days of a week do whatever you need to do to make your existence easier if it's broken fix it if it's raw cooking if it's cold heat it up if it's hot cool it down make your existence easier but one day out of them out of the week one day out of the week stop leave your existence alone it is what it is it's fine if you take it too seriously if you go around the year always working and worrying about your existence you're going to get depressed so one day out of the week focus on life by leaving your existence alone whatever you bought before shabbos that's what you have you didn't buy it you don't have whatever got cooked that's what you have you didn't cook it so fine your existence is fine it really is even when it's minimal even when jews lived in a ghetto when jews lived in poverty when jews but shabbos i got no problems i'm content with my existence it's fine we focus on life why did god create the world and the very simple way of putting it god's perfection when we say god is perfect he's infinite he's we're talking about his existence he always was and he always will be and he occupies all the space it's all his but like the husband he came to us at mount sinai and said i can exist without you i'm really good at it i have an infinite existence i existed infinitely before you i'll exist infinitely after you my existence is great but without you what's the point existence without a life the existence itself demands a purpose a content and the more perfect you are the more you need a life to justify all that perfection in some way affluent people successful people are more likely to get depressed than people in third world countries because when your existence is fine then it hits you like what for so what now what and if you don't ask it your children will ask it okay fine so people who are still trying to improve their existence don't get depressed people whose existence is already fine now they have to face the question and and and so that's what a midlife crisis is you're going along doing fine you're halfway there and going to crisis what is that all about when you get halfway there it means that pretty much your existence is going to be what it is if you hadn't made your first million by now you know you're not going to make a million so your existence kind of uh stops being a challenge and then you have to figure out what's my life now i got to get a life this is why we say you know what happens when we drink i mean you may have read about it when people drink and get drunk their existence relaxes they say your inhibitions relax oh i hope not your existence relaxes and this is factual this is true because how do you know if somebody is drunk if they're still standing up you know because when he wants to talk to you sober he stands over here in america south america is different south america they stand here but when they get drunk they stand here and you back away and they follow you now you know he's drunk because he doesn't take up space he's lost his sense of space you go to buy a sofa and the salesperson says to you here's a nice sofa this will seat four people comfortably it's not enough information it will seat four sober people comfortable it'll also seat nine drunk people comfortably because drunk people don't take up space isn't that a fact would be cute to see nine drunk guys on a sofa sober up at the same moment drunk people don't take up space because it relaxes your existence that's why you never drink when you're in a bad mood if you're not excited about life don't drink as the worst thing you can do because if you're not excited about life all you have is your existence you don't want to relax it because then you're left with nothing purim we assume you're in a good mood then you can have a few drinks at a wedding if you're enjoying it then you can have a few drinks when you're excited about life then you want your existence to leave you alone so that you can celebrate life fully so you say lechayan meaning not i don't want to die you're saying to life rather than existence so i am going to drink this because i'm excited about life don't look for gimmicks life is happy existence is not you want happiness live you don't have to do anything to make yourself happy live life is happy existence even if it's really good is somewhat depressing we choose life and because we choose life over existence we will exist forever because we don't care we don't care about our existence we're busy living and life cannot die make sense [Applause] you know i do a lot of talking a lot of zooming many classes many subjects but that's all formal stuff hopefully good stuff but formal we also have a wednesday night meeting that's more informal and kind of hamish if you want to join us for that kind of an event interactive time for questions and so on if you want to join us for this side of conversation click on the link below and join us every wednesday night at nine o'clock well maybe not every wednesday night but we try to make it every wednesday night at nine o'clock a more informal chat which can be more enjoyable at times than the formal stuff so check it out click on the link and join us try it you'll like it [Music] you

Channel: Rabbi Manis Friedman

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Id: gZ1i28X64e4

Length: 37min 21sec (2241 seconds)

Published: Mon Dec 28 2020