Charlotte Gambill - Mending Fences pt2

[Music] hey welcome to Life Church I'm Steve Campbell I'm the lead pastor this is going to be a great time we shared together because of how great God is come on let's get this started well last week if you were here and if you weren't you can do a quick catch up I began talking about mending fences not your fences at home not your garden fence not you know your yard fence but actually mending the things inside our lives the building up of our relationships our marriages the things in our life that we are building that actually the enemy is hell-bent on tearing down and recognizing that actually in our lives we all have these walls that we're building these relationships were building these lives we are building and at any given time the enemy would like to put a hole in the wall of your life put a hole in the fence of your life and we based it on the scripture that is founded Ephesians which I'll reread to you as we get this concept back in our mind and move forward another step today but in Ephesians 4 1 to 6 in the message this is where we stayed for a little while last week it says in light of all this here's what I want you to do I want you to get out there and walk better yet run on the road God called you to travel I don't want any of you sitting around on your hands I don't want anyone strolling off down some path that goes nowhere a mark that you do this with humility and discipline not in fits and starts but steadily pouring yourself out for each other in acts of love alert at noticing differences and quick at mending fences alert at noticing differences and quick at mending fences and last week I began to explain to you that we have to live with an alertness to the things that come into our lives that if we are not aware of or we are not vigilant about they won't just come in but they will wreak havoc in your life if you're not living on this alert to deal with the offense to deal with the bitterness to deal with the disappointment then it will be allowed to take over a lot more space than if you'd have been alert to it you could have shut down before it did the amount of damage that it's seeking to do and so we have to live a little quick everybody say quick quick mending fences and I mentioned last week some of you it's been 22 years since you said sorry it's been a long time overdue since you went back and sorted that out you have had the bad temper for years and you are still having the bad temper and there is a quickness that God is after in our lives in mending fences that's why the Bible says don't let the Sun go down on your anger it's an idea that you're supposed to fix things quicker than often we want to because our stubbornness kicks in and we feel we all right and we'd been wronged and we don't want to fix it but the enemy waiting for you and I to stop being quick he likes it when we're slow and we leave it so I asked last week for you to write down some things to examine the walls of your life we went to look at Nehemiah who actually went to actually rebuild walls but before he rebuilt anything he took a walk and I asked you last week to take a walk that was your homework to take a walk around the walls of your life to take a walk around your relational world to take a walk around the way that you think and the way that you believe in the way that you speak to walk around it and Nehemiah as he walked around he examined the walls to find where the break was he examined the walls to find where the broken down parts were and as we walk around our lives we might not want to acknowledge that there is a break other is rubble whether should be a wall built up but until we examine where the break is we can't do anything about it until we examine and say I have a problem I have an anger issue I'm stubborn until we until we examine the walls and go I am err I'm a drama queen till we examine the walls and go I hold onto things way longer than I should to examine the walls and go I have let fear run amok in my life I have got an offense that I've never dealt with until you Ling to examine where the break is then we can't move forward so that's why we labored last week for a lot longer than I thought we were but the presence of God is here to help you and your God's kids and God knows what he needs to say to you and sometimes you gotta just lean in and go okay god I think this is what you want to rest on us this week and so I asked us to write it down some of you might have written it down in a physical notepad but you've got on your knee others of you you might have thought no I've got it here right in front of me today I'm thinking of it I know it is I said to my kids on the way to church I said you know what is it what's the thing in your mind you need to have something in your mind that when you listen this morning you can identify that's what I'm doing the work on because you can listen to messages week in and week out but until you start to get specific I tell you now you'll just have a lot of information maybe your Amen a few sermons but you will walk out of this door and life will kick in and you will leave all the wisdom that was dropped on your life at the seat where you were sat and sometimes you have to go okay today I have come with this in mind and today I'm gonna get a step to go home and take to help me make this better does that make sense we all on the same page kind of hearing amen not bad almost all of you will get all of you by the end of the sermon sometimes we don't like these messages I don't particularly like preaching these messages they don't get a lot of amens they get a lot of really do we have to do this you know can we don't have something more exciting can we not have a WoW message and I just seem to end up with all the owl messages and I'm sorry about that but I know that these messages are what have built my life changed my marriage helped me be a better parent helped me be a better friend these are the DIY messages in the Bible it's not saying go call your friend to come amend you fence I looked for that version of this message doesn't say give it to the pastor and they will sort you all out fear no that's not in there either it says that you have to be quick to mend your own fence so how do we do that now that we've examined our walls now that we've identified an area and I want to say to you if you are sat here with 50 areas in your brain this is not going to help you you need to narrow it down I applaud your honesty but you will be overwhelmed so what you need to do is just start with one or two and let's get those ones fixed and then you know what once you've learned this principle you can go on to three and four but if you sit here this morning thinking about all the things in your life that need fixing I guarantee you you will leave here more overwhelmed than helped and so focus in on something that you got this is gonna be my work for the next few weeks after you've examined those walls after you examine your walls and you identify what it is that you feel you need to work on then the second thing that we can learn from naio Maya is his genius plan of how to get the job done see Nehemiah saw that there were so many breaks in the wall there was so much rubble there was so much work to do that he could be sat in a service like this overwhelmed with well what do I even do where do I even begin how do I even fix this thing and so Nehemiah had the same revelation there's a lot of work to be done here and I need to break it down I need to make it so that we can actually make progress and so he had a brilliant idea which I am asking us to adopt as our step after we've examined our walls the first step is this it says named Irene 3 verse 28 after examining the walls he made a plan and the plan was this that he would ask everyone to go and make repairs and he says in verse 28 he told all the priests to make repairs each in front of his own house basically what Nehemiah came up with was the only way this wall is going to get fixed is if everybody axis what's right in front of them genius instead of some big strategy meeting everybody coming together breaking down all the roles and responsibilities everybody having a plan everybody happened to come to certain meetings is like when you open your curtains on the morning when you pull back the blinds when you wake up whatever mess rubble whole part of the whole you can see that is what I need you to do I need you to fix what is in front of you I don't need you to come and tell me what is broken two streets down it's not your no I don't need that I don't need you to come and tell me that so-and-so has not got out of bed and fixed his wall today I don't need you to tell me that either I don't need you to come and tell me that your whole and your part is not as bad as the person three doors down part I don't need you to tell me that either I don't need you to reduce the work I don't need you to exaggerate other people's work all I want you to do is when you wake up in the morning I want you to fix what's in front of you and I want you to fix what's in front of you and I want you to fix what's in front of you and lo and behold I will show you how we get all the wall built back up by everybody taking personal responsibility for what's right in front of them genius oh I don't know what you mean okay let me break it down even more I know you do know what I mean and you want me to move on but we're gonna go there today because this is how change happens right so let's say let's use me let's say one of the things that's in front of me is that I need to let me think of something I have so many things about fence I'm sure I need to work on say one of the things is I need to have more patience I need to not jump in and try and fix something when somebody else needs to be fixing it instead say that's me okay so I open my fence and outside my fence I see my children who have not done what I asked them to do and now I'm feeling like I need to go and tell them again what it is that they seem to have failed to remember I told them to do and now I see sir over here something else that I have been waiting for her and my patience is running thin normally what we do is we go tell the children to go do what it is that they need to deal with or we go and speak to the person about what they've let us down that we're waiting for but when you're fixing what's in front of you you have to go Charlotte are you being over-controlling Charlotte are you losing your patience and it's only been five minutes Charlotte are you putting a standard on them which is ridiculous for an eleven-year-old chill your jets back off calm down have a cup of coffee Charlotte can you hold your tongue or does this need to be said right now that's me fixing what's in front of me now when you're focusing on what I have to fix in me and say my children are focusing on when mum asks for something I need to be not lazy say they're working on I need to actually make my bed because she asked me and that was three days ago and it's still not made and in their mind it's like what's the point in making it because I'm gonna get back in bed tonight and mess it up again that's which is makes sense but to the Peron who walks past it every day it's just annoying right so it's not that they're deliberately being be naughty and it's not that I'm deliberately being a control freak it's that I want something and they want something different but what we do is we make that World War three and you escalate the making bed into something that actually has higher stakes in your marriage or in a relationship or in a friendship you escalate it up and you can see how it goes from something that should have never been an issue to something that now we're not even talking I want to be in the same room with each other so what we have to do is go I think if I work on the part of me that this winds up and they work on the part of them that this is a frustration there maybe I'll make progress and maybe when I do turn and look to the side of me I'll see that they've made progress too and behold we will have saved our family from stress and arguing fixing what in front of you well it wasn't my fault yeah that's not your part of the wall yep yeah but they said it far worse than I said it yeah but that's not your part of the wall they clearly need to fix what's in front of them which is their tongue and shooting their mouth off and saying things they don't mean but your part is you're holding a grudge you're holding a grudge you're holding a grudge you get more and more angry mom upset so the part in front of you is I need to let it go let it go play frozen if you have to I don't know what you need to do but I need to forgive but they haven't changed to make no difference I need to forgive to set me free because that fixes what's in front of me so this message means nobody is off the hook you can't sing you see and go it's the wife's fault because you have a part to play too you can't sit as you're seeing go but it's all the kids fault cuz now you have to deal what's in front of you you have to open your curtains and fix what's in front of you and you will find that when you get busy fixing what's in front of you you are not forcing on half of the things you used to cuz you don't have time because you realize I really need to fix this I have a lot of work to do I need to bite my tongue and stop telling everybody else what to do you realize I have a lot of work and you get busy an MA and you if we're gonna get this done I need everybody to take responsibility for what's outside their front door what can you fix that's right in front of you what is it that you wake up every day and it's like a repeat play of something that you actually need to stop having play out in your life where is it that you can identify something and say I'm going to work on that today you know it's not easy to admit and it's not easy to roll your sleeves up and to start to fix what's in front of you it's a lot easier to tell everybody else what to fix takes courage and boldness to say in a family scenario or in a friendship so now you know what I'm gonna fix this imagine the relief if your kids came to you and went mom I don't need you anymore to talk to me about my temper because you know what I'm gonna fix what's in front of me mom I'm gonna I'm gonna get I'm gonna get this beat in me I'm not gonna lose my rag anymore I'm not I'm gonna I'm gonna pray about it I'm gonna go mom I don't need you to don't need you freak out about it anymore I need you to know it's right in front of me I'm on it you'd be like hallelujah you know what just happened to my child what a gift that is to you but we all get to give that gift to each other we all get to say I'm gonna work on this so stop stressing yourself out about it and I might not always get it right but I need you to know I see it and when I wake up in the morning I'm asking God to help me with it and I'm praying for wisdom in it and I'm reading books on it and I'm getting help on it I'm fixing what's in front of me now when you begin to fix what's in front of you it's not long once you put your hand to this I'm telling you it's not long once you make this decision the progress starts to happen it's not don't let that people go let the enemy fool you that this is a 10-year project I believe if you actually roll your sleeves up and say to God I am gonna beat this thing I am gonna repent of this thing I'm gonna get help in this thing it can fast forward your life progress happens quickly once you step into the cycle of I am NOT gonna let this beat me I'm gonna I'm gonna change I have seen people change rapid fast and it's been a deep work because they have absolutely set their face like flint that I'm not living this way anymore so once you start fixing what's in front of you you start to momentum what happened with Nehemiah was that where they had all been down here in the rubble outside their own life trying to fix what's in front of them now all of a sudden people are making progress and as they're making progress progress means that you're coming up higher and now you're not down in the same conversations you used to have before because now you're perspectives of shifting now you can see actually I can beat that temper and it doesn't have to be the way I am I don't have to say that and there is another way to live and suddenly you start to make progress now as you make progress the enemy gets nervous because all of a sudden you are not drawn in by the things that you used to be drawn in before you temper is not lost when the beds not made you're not flying off the handle at the one little thing that you used to fly off the handle because now you're working on it so now there's a there's a momentum in your life and as you get higher from the pettiness because that's what it is your perspective begins to shift and you need you start to breathe different air and you start to realize this this I don't have to live down there I can come up higher now the enemy hates that it hates it when there's progress in your marriage or progress in the way that you talk or progressing your self-control or progress in an area of your life that you've been dog food for years it hates it so don't be surprised as you start to get progress that the enemy starts to come after you a little bit harder don't be surprised that as you're making the steps to fix something that the challenges become a little bit difficult he's not that bothered when you're in the rubble because you're doing his job for him when you're not dealing with you and fixing the hole in your fans he's not that bothered cuz it's like you've left the hole open for so long it's so easy for me to get you off cut off so easy to get me out of church so easy for me to get you're having a bad day but when you start getting up the ladder and start putting the bogs in and start bringing the fence together now he's nervous and first Nehemiah was going up the ladder and as he was making progress and all of a sudden you could see now solid walls weather was rubble before the enemy approaches Nehemiah to try and get him to come down off the ladder I want to say to you if you're going to fix your fences you need to stay on your ladder and avoid the chatter stay on your ladder and avoid the chatter word came to Nehemiah as he's fixing the walls and the enemy invites them come let us meet together in one of the villages but he knew they were scheming to harm him so Nehemiah sent back this reply I think this guy was from Yorkshire he says I'm carrying on a great project and I cannot go down why should the work stop while I leave it and go down to you the enemy came back again and said four times fifth time they come back so the enemy will be relentless in trying to get you back down to a broken marriage friendships that are on the rocks terrible atmosphere in your home back into your old ways no self-control he'll be endless to invite you back down to some of those conversations that you used to live in he does not want you to realize there's a whole different set of relationships there's actually peace that can be in your home newsflash you can actually sit down with your family and enjoy each other's company it is something that you can aim for it may take a while but you can get there if you stay on your ladder and stay committed to so they came back four times come down come down and four times named Isis no we're not coming down staying on my ladder the fifth time they come back and now they accuse him of something that he is not guilty of and they say to Nehemiah while you're doing all this because you think you're better than everybody else and you're trying to you know build something greater than everyone else and you want to be king over everyone else and this is why I think he's from Yorkshire this is his reply nothing like what you are saying is happening you are making it up out of your head and some of you need to realize that the enemy will get desperate as you start to fix your fence and he'll invite you not just once twice three times to come back down into the gossip to come back down into the circle who are also disgruntled about their husbands to come back down and hang out with the other women who cast on their kids come back down and hang out with the other guy that has a temper problem what's the big deal I mean she deserved it or he deserved it oh that's just the way is all the other person that's been dishonest at work and hang out in the company it will be one two three four times and you have to say I'm about a great work I'm rebuilding my life I'm fixing my fence and I cannot come down I'm about something better I've realized got us something greater for my family than where we'd been living for the last ten years and here's the thing you sometimes need to realize the enemy is making stuff up out of his own head he is the stuff that you're like oh I'm missing out or you know all people are saying this about us or our friends you know gonna leave us because now you know we don't look like we you still look it's just all nonsense and you have to make a decision as a mature man and woman of God I don't care whether you're 13 or whether you're 33 or whether you're 80 maturity is a decision I've met very immature 50 year old man and I've met very mature 16 year old kids maturity is a decision to do what I'm saying now maturity is a decision to fix the fence start with what's in front of you and start to go up the ladder and avoid the chatter some of you are trying to make progress but your progress is undone by the Facebook's you read it's just not good chatter fee to be in it's not helpful pulls you back into your past it's conversations that are not good they're not moving you forward there's comments on there and criticism on there pulling people down which is what you used to do and you're reading it and you think well because I'm reading it and I'm not commenting it's not affecting me don't be so foolish the enemy will take you either through your eyes or three years he'll take it any way to get it in you and you go to bed and it's in your mind and it's in your thought process so some of you need to go I'm staying on my ladder and I'm avoiding the chatter straight cleansing and healthy to unfollow some people just go you know what I don't think this is good for me right now ties me to a past I'm trying to move on from gets me in a conversation that I don't thinks helping me build forward Emma just know and be wise with your life and go you know what I need to fix something and this is not helping me fix it it's frustrating me fixing it I know what it is that would be the hole in your fence I don't know what it is that you would say it's been a long time I've not been quick with this but I know a God who is able hey whatever you're facing whatever you need from Jesus he's your ever-present help in time of need would you allow me just to pray right now just for you and your situations and circumstances that you're facing Jesus thank you that you are alive and you're ready to help us in every circumstance of life in our job situations with a family situation with everything that we face Jesus truly be Lord of every situational God great we pray for healing we pray for financial breakthrough we pray for all kinds of situations with extended family Lord that you would improve our situations today in the mighty name of Jesus we pray amen [Music]

Channel: LIFE Church

Views: 3,098

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Keywords: life church, uk, abundant life church, charlotte gambill, steve gambill, paul scanlon, dave niblock, mike harvie, jock james, matt hooper, life worship, dance again, wide open space, we believe, burn, love let loose, cherish conference, first direct arena, rocknations youth conference, xcel mens conference, lead, dare to be, miracle in the middle

Id: YH1_ssqmBEw

Length: 26min 56sec (1616 seconds)

Published: Wed Mar 21 2018