BITTERNESS: MOST-DANGEROUS, MOST-DEBILITATING, MOST-COMMON SIN

if you open your Bibles to Ephesians 4:32 32 what we're looking at this morning is probably one of the most dangerous deadly and prevalent sins that I have observed in my 40 years of serving Christ Church and that is people who are not enjoying the kind tender-hearted forgiving life that God gave to us as believers and so this morning it's communion sunday communion sunday has attached to it almost like a little reminder that communion is when we examine ourselves before the Lord and before we partake of the bread when it's past and before we partake of a cup when it is past we have prior to that examined our own hearts and made sure there is no unforeseen unconfessed and unsought for the cleansing of the Lord's sin in our lives if we live with a conscience void of offense toward God that means there's no unrepentant sin our life and toward people that means there's no lingering unsettled difficulty relationally with someone else then we have and we enjoy a kind tender-hearted forgiving life that's what God has given to us as believers now I reminded the first service that always in the New Testament the gathering of the church was for Christians now if you slipped in and you're not a Christian you are welcome this morning but you'll think we're a little crazy because you don't understand the operating system it would be like being dropped in to Macworld convention with one of those whatever that other system is you know you would think they were crazy you know what I mean or dropped into a country where they all speak one language and you don't and we've all experienced that church always biblically and throughout history has been the gathering of the body of Christ to be nurtured to be challenged to examine ourselves and to go out from here and live such winsome lives that people want to follow us and find out what makes us different and that's why we open all these outreach events and the concerts and and all other things that we do but this morning before communion are you enjoying a kind tender-hearted forgiving life which is what God gave to us as believers that's that's the essence now most of you know this verse by heart and and what we have is we are saved by God's grace and and never forget that for by grace have you been saved through faith and that not of yourselves it is it's not by works it's a gift that God gave us so that none of us would boast that it's our works that's salvation we are saved by God's grace but God's grace that saved us goes on salvation is the most amazing work of God in the universe stars are great galaxies are amazing atoms are intricately constructed our DNA is a wonder of divine engineering but salvation is so incomprehensible the scriptures say angels angels these beings that never tire that that as far as we know are with powers beyond anything we can comprehend these angels long to look into what we have because salvation is so marvelously designed by God salvation is an absolutely free offer of an endless journey as a beloved family member of God Almighty Himself nothing compares to what God offers you know most people like to travel can you imagine going on an all-expense-paid trip somewhere can you imagine going on an all-expense-paid trip where no expense is spared somewhere but can you imagine doing that with God as our father and how he shows us I mean you know it's kind of like doing the National Geographic only instead of them trying to figure out how everything got to be so nice the one that made it shows us I mean that's just a tiny bit of what salvation is when every when everybody looks at salvation nothing compares to it in fact if you think of what every human has ever longed for salvation abundantly exponentially above the greatest desire of any human's heart provides think of what people are looking for people long for pure delight I mean they find it in sensual ways and chemical ways they find it in thrills but they're looking for that pure delight God says I will give you more than you could ever dream of of pure delight how about absolute security people are always wanting security in fact you know with the events going on people are every month is becoming even more greater amount of people trying to secure themselves through different means with current world events God says you want absolute security I'm the only one he said I'm an only company that offers absolute security he who watches over you neither slumbers nor sleeps the Lord surrounds us he said nothing shall befall you said you want absolute security comes from me endless satisfaction how about immortality did you know that's what the billionaire's club is working on I mean they've already done the cryogenics you know the flash freeze as soon as one of the them dies they flash freeze them so that they can preserve them now they're trying to download their mind before the the organic part of it dies so that the non-organic the electronic part because they're in electronica they can download that because they want to have immortality Allison whatever's name is the guy that founded the Oracle software I mean he has spent hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of millions of dollars in longevity in life advancement they want immortality the problem is the prescription for immortality is written down and they say we want anything but that but the author the only one that has the the the endless life offer said there's only one way and the world says I don't want that way I'm gonna design and find a different way well endless life got offers and so much more and that's God's offer of salvation and that comes as a result of salvation we become at the instant of salvation by God's grace kind and tender-hearted and forgiving why are we those things because Christ forgave us and it's the response of our heart a heart that's been saved salvation is eternally permanent salvation is graciously unconditional salvation is fully paid for by God alone so in other words we are saved by God's grace but secondly once we're saved by God's grace were to obey by God's grace to be kind to be tender-hearted to be forgiving that no one could ever do anything to us that even in a small way reflects how much we've sinned against God and as we said last week there is a humility that comes in salvation that we become the most guilty sinner we know personally in the whole world if you're saved this morning you are the most guilty sinner you know of in the whole world you don't really know anybody else you don't know why they did what they did what prompted them how they got there what they really did and what God thought of it but we know our sins are painfully aware to us were aware of conscious of them inside of God so we are to obey by God's grace now here's a verse to think about this is first John 2:4 John is writing at the end of the era of the Apostles here's the last writing apostle he is the last living witness of Jesus Christ's earthly ministry as an apostle and he's looking through the churches through the lens of of all that God has revealed to him and he writes a very sobering epistle first John is very sobering this is just one verse he says he who says I know him and does not keep his Commandments is a liar and the truth is not in him well that's negative that wouldn't play well in 21st century Christianity that's that's down a downer we don't want Downers well we want we want everything to be positive do you know what he's saying right there if someone claims to be a follower of Christ and doesn't keep the operating system that salvation brings they're lying they don't really know Christ now think of the implications of that the only reliable evidence of a person being saved is not a past experience of receiving Christ did you know when Jesus ministered to the Jews they all thought they were God's people all of them even the ones that murdered him we're doing so because they thought they were followers of the true and living God they did not have a personal relationship with God why because they thought they became members of God's family because they were in the Covenant it was kind of genetic that they were born in the right family or they thought it was because they were circumcised it was kind of a surgical salvation or they thought it was ceremonial that they were following all those ceremonies and rigmarole of the temple did you know we have the same thing today we have people that think that because they were born a Christian family they're a Christian because they were baptized they're a Christian because they they repeated after someone a set of words that never did anything internally to them they did not get a supernatural rebirth they didn't get a new heart they didn't get a new spirit but they did pray did you know that the only reliable evidence of a person being saved is not a past experience of something they think an experience or an emotion or a high or they said something but a present life that reflects Christ that's what John said if you claim that you know him and you are not living the life you're a liar and the truth isn't in you why because the truth is so powerful Jesus says my truth set you free and it's so powerful that if you claim to have that truth and I do not see it operating in you John said you're not really in the family of God we are to obey by God's grace and the only reliable test of salvation is a life and what's the sign and seal of our salvation who does all this how do we know we're saved it's the Spirit of God what does he do in our lives the Spirit of God produces something in all true believers he produces a reflection of Christ that is kind that is tender-hearted that is forgiving in fact right here in our text I told you to turn to Ephesians 4 right here in our text look what it says it says truly born again people are to put away sinful behavior by the grace of God how does that work it's the Holy Spirit Ephesians 4:32 32 talks about what we as believers are to do as evidence of the new operating system we got so that's we're gonna look at this morning you're ready are you in Ephesians 4:32 32 let's all stand we're gonna read it and pray and ask God to open it to our hearts this is the sinful behavior that grace puts out of our life Ephesians 4 starting in verse 30 and do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption verse 31 let all bitterness wrath anger clamor and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice verse 32 and be kind to one another tender-hearted forgiving one another even as God in Christ forgave you wow what a connection the Holy Spirit brings change that issues into a kind tender-hearted forgiving life as evidence of the new birth that's what we've come to celebrate let's bow for word of prayer father I pray that you would open our hearts to your word that you would open our hearts to respond that you would help us to rid ourselves of the deadliest of the cancers that spreads that poisons that entrap imprisons and wastes away so many believers who would never think of some illicit substance or some illicit sensual sexual perversion but they fester smolder with bitterness and unforgiveness toward those that have bumped and scraped and cut them off and offended and hurt them in life how deadly is the cancer of an unforgiving spirit that left untreated leads to the deadly condition of bitterness that poisons everything I pray that not one of us who know you this morning would come to the communion table with your hands reaching out to us these elements to remember your death on the cross and as we reach out for those elements for that bread may we not take it with hands losing with a defilement of an unforgiving bitter heart I pray that we would know your cleansing that we would rid ourselves by your grace this morning so that your spirit engraved pours out the kind and tender-hearted and forgiving life that's our prayer in the name of Jesus we ask it amen you may be seated what are those words in verse 31 have you ever thought about the the vocabulary that God uses it's interesting what the scriptures say in fact the New International I love how it it starts verse 31 if you have the NIV it says get rid of I mean isn't that kind of that's clear get rid of don't keep around this is deadly it's it's poisonous it's it's it's spreads it's like having you know anthrax in your kitchen in your flower container and you might accidentally spat you know put it into something get rid of it don't keep it around get rid of what what's first on the list bitterness bitterness reflects a smoldering resentment bitterness is a brooding grudge it's an attitude where a spirit of irritability keeps us in perpetual animosity we become sour in life and venomous toward those close to us doesn't sound very good does it and yet it's so present and so allowed and cultivated the second one wrath seumas it's a wild rage it's it's a passion just blowing up with no restraints anger or gaya is the word it's an internal smouldering it's that subtle deep feeling that just that that's always kind of under the surface like a reef to sink things clamor crowd gaze the word is a shout or the outcry of strife that reflects itself in public outburst when someone is out of control and their face and there are words and there they're just out of control clamor slander actually the word is blasphemy ax in Greek it's the ongoing defamation of someone that can only come from a bitter heart it rises from a heart embittered and then the last one that ends a verse is just the general term for evil kaki is the word and it says evil is at the heart of all this an evil in our heart and evil aloud in our heart will will soon permeate our heart and will darken us so what's the answer it must be put away from you let all bitterness wrath anger clamor and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice what he's saying is is beware a bitterness it ruins the kind tender-hearted forgiving life bitterness ruins it did you remember I mean things are happening it's cascading these days in fact it's gonna be interest tonight the last question from last week is the first question tonight about prophecy is he interesting but can you remember two or three weeks ago the Paris thing I mean we have our own things and we've kind of forget that the international ones so quickly but did you know when the terrorists were shooting up all the concert and everything in Paris do you know what the French government immediately deployed hundreds I think even thousands of troops to they surrounded the reservoir that the three million people that live in Paris all drink every drop of water from because they said if some Terrace is so blatantly shooting up one cesium 234 or 235 or whatever cesium number is on the periodic chart thrown in there would would just poison three million people did you know bitterness ruins poisons what God wants to do in our lives there are many infections of the soul that are caused by sin one of the more powerful infections is called bitterness bitterness slowly infects a person's life systemically you know bitterness is the difference between bitterness and other sins is other sins are kind of like a mosquito bite and mosquito bite harms the area it bites but if the mosquito is carrying malaria its systemically harms the life bitterness is systemic and it just crops up everywhere every part of a person that's embitters life becomes defiled Hebrews 12:15 tells us that their joys become soured they can't get any joy out of stuff it's all sour to them their hopes are dimmed there's just no hopes left their spiritual life gets distant in fact God just seems to far away in the dark somewhere in the fog beware of allowing bitterness to destroy your life one of the struggles believers have always faced while seeking to follow the Lord is bitterness that's why if Easons 430 is here it says verse 30 don't grieve the Holy Spirit of God don't don't pour water on the furnace that energizes your life don't put out the source of light and warmth and power in your life and then what's the very first thing he lists that is a quencher of the holy spirit verse 31 don't grieve the spirit so put away bitterness and get back to verse 32 a kind tender-hearted forgiving life that the Holy Spirit brings the immeasurable power of God has stopped when people disobey God's grace teaches us to deny ungodliness but when we resist that grace our sin grieves and quenches the Holy Spirit see there are sins that we'd never do that but there are sins that are allowed and you just say that's how they are they're easily hurt they hold on to grudges just take some longer than other people that would be like saying we'll wait until the melanoma is four-by-four before we take them in you know we the copay is so high let's just wait until it gets bigger you know and deeper see bitterness is deadly bitterness is a deadly fast growing and easily spread form of spiritual cancer in the New Testament every time the word bitterness is used it's always a form of Greek word pick you know think pick X ice pick it's it's the same root it speaks of something sharp that pricks or cuts and the the Greek word used for bitterness implies something that punctures and penetrates deeply so that makes verse 31 very fascinating look at verse 31 you know what's fascinating about it number one it's the very first sin listed after Paul warns about the horrible dangers of grieving the Holy Spirit of God in the life of a believer bitterness is first on that list don't forget that don't forget that closest to the the grievers that quench the spirit of God his bitterness an unforgiving attitude second the verse is right on the other side of another warning look at verse 29 you know what's interesting is verse 30 about the Holy Spirit being grieved is sandwiched between these two very graphic pictures see what verse 29 says it says don't let any corrupt words out of your mouth one of the dangers signs of a bitter person is they always say rotten things about the people they're hurt by and you can always be sure you're going to get a little volcanic eruption of venom if you bring up that person or that situation or whatever you know I I i watch this all the time I I talked to people and and they come in and I sit there and open the Bible and I take my pad and I say oh just unbroke and just talk I want to hear everything on your mind that you came in for and I just am taking notes and sometimes I go oh could I just ask I don't want to stop this but caius well no question because they've gone on and on and on I see did this happen last week they look at me and they go it's the first time they smiley go oh no no no that was in the 70s I say you can vividly recall with facial grimaces something that happened 40 years ago you really have a good memory could you give me five verses on the spot mm-hmm no I came here to talk about this you know and it's just they're consumed and it's fact I was speaking someone this week and they told me how they did not descend into bitterness in a horrible situation in their life was that the person that counseled them says are you sure you want to take that person with you on every family outing every every holiday observance every party do you want to bring them on every trip you go to you want to take them into your bedroom at night you want them actually to be in bed with you at night because that's what bitterness does that person never leaves your life they're constantly in front of you and you choose that and basically it's unhealthy but what is bitterness bitterness is a consequence of an unforgiving heart how did we even get into this we're in the Lord's Prayer right there verse 12 forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us Hawaii because of verses 14 and 15 do you remember those verses from the Lord's Prayer it says if you forgive men their trespasses if you just say there's nothing you can do that I will ever hold against you because God is not holding anything against me your heavenly Father will also forgive you verse 15 but if you do not forgive men their trespasses neither will your Father forgive your zhh you know there's three ways that you could take that verse number one you could say Jesus didn't mean what he said that's how some people they just come to it they say well he didn't mean that or you could say he wasn't talking to Christians he was talking to the the wicked apostate you know Sadducees or you could say that this is not congruent with the rest of scriptures and all three are incorrect this verse jesus said it and meant it this verse he said and meant to believers and this verse squares with everything else in the Bible first John 2:4 Hebrews 12:15 and on and on week ago what Jesus is saying is there are consequences in the life of a believer getting saved only solves eternal matters we are still responsible in life for the consequences of our sins boy did I learn that when I was little we used to host in our home men from the Lansing City rescue mission gloriously saved they knew verses they they served and loved the Lord and their livers and stomachs were shocked because they had been decade-long alcoholics there are lifelong consequences to choices we make you choose to be unforgiving in this life the consequence is what Jesus said his strongest warning do you remember that from chapter 18 in fact let's turn there chapter 18 verse 34 this is what Jesus said this is this is the strongest in the Gospels warning to believers Jesus makes of all of his teaching to the disciples this was the the high-water mark of severity he never says anything this strongly in the Gospels he does say it in Revelation he does say in other places but not in the Gospels do you member verse 34 I never what Jesus said he said that the strongest warning Jesus ever gave his disciples he warned that the result of bitter and unforgiving heart was grave and as we look there he says in verse 34 he brings up this this idea of the torturers in fact I want to read it effect it's so good I don't want to paraphrase it Jesus tells this long starting in verse 21 he starts telling this this parable and as he gets down to verse 34 he says and his master the one that forgave him the incalculable ten thousand talent deal which is a picture of God the Father his master was angry and delivered him to the torturers some say Oh God would never know it's not the executioner's he isn't losing his salvation he isn't being killed and and no longer part it's to the tormentors he delivers him to the torturers the the tormentors until he should pay all that was due him what's due to it what what is due God what do we pay God we obey Him that's the sacrifice of our heart his obedience this guy is going to be in the Tormentor still he obeys and what's the obedience the obedience is to be kind and tender hard unforgiving like God in Christ has forgiven you what happens if we don't what if we think we're an exception you no exception is implies the church we think that's for them that's for them we read the Bible oh that's a good one for my wife oh that's a good one for my husband oh that's really good for my kids we're supposed to read the Bible that's really good for me and I need that change in my life what does he say if we're exceptions to the rule and we can can cultivate this bitterness bitterness leads to intense inner torment now look how Jesus says it in the next verse verse 35 34 would have been a great story and we could just push that off into the collection of great stories Jesus told but he he points it at us you ever feel uncomfortable you know when I was teaching my boys how to hunt you know they're cleaning their guns and they're turning them Torah make oh well let's turn that the other way here let's all point our guns that away you know while we're cleaning out in case you know I know they're empty but let's just do that you know Jesus points it toward us and we start feeling uncomfortable that's why everybody says well he's not talking to us it isn't what he meant he didn't say that he was talking to someone else no he did mean and he is talking to us and he says in verse 35 so my heavenly father will do to you if each of you he individualizes that right down to each of us are responsible for God to from our heart forgive our brother his trespasses we have to be kind and tender-hearted why because bitterness leads to intense inner torment jesus said that we hand ourselves over to the torturers verse 34 when we embed our hearts against someone those who live in the gall of bitterness imprisoned themselves in an emotional concentration camp that was what I told you about the first said you want to take that that person that you're so bitter about you ought to take them with you everywhere they'll go on every holiday trip with you they'll be at every wedding and everything else they'll just be there all the time spoiling everything because you're imprisoning yourself with them what's amazing is we become the victims of immense self inflicted it internal torment nurturing bitterness is as foolish as drinking poison it's just like diving into a dark pit not knowing what's at the bottom just jumping that's foolish so it's bitterness our refusal to forgive walls us into solitary confinement and bitterness becomes our tormentor as we're confined in the situation Jesus warns that any believer as a candidate for this unspeakable emotional and mental torment when bitterness producing unforgiveness is practiced now back to Ephesians because you know it could get a little bit hopeless you know if you just keep talking about this but Ephesians contains the way out that that's the blessing of all this do you see why Paul lists bitterness first and verse 31 in the lineup of spirit grievers do you see why he says put away all bitterness because it's so deadly so dangerous it's so painful it's so quick to spread it has to be dealt with right away a bitter person is cut and punctured by the words of others and those wounds untreated by the healing grace of tender-hearted forgiving attitude become a source of malignant poison you see we're going to go through life and we're going to be constantly scraped cut bumped bruised bit that's just how it is but we have an internal antiseptic that keeps those wounds from being it doesn't take away the ones it isn't that where we don't deny that people have harmed us it is not denial you don't say no one has ever abused you no one has ever done anything it's not denial it's applying the antiseptic and the antiseptic is the Spirit of God verse 30 that seals us and we choose to not allow a bitterness and wrath and clamor and evil speaking to be allowed around we rid ourselves we put it away see the grace of God that brings salvation teaches us to rid ourselves of these things God is standing ready to pull you know I'm a beekeeper and early on for 20 years or more I've been doing this in my my sweet little boys buddies always wanted to help me and they would get that bee stinger and they'd go running to mom I said don't run to mom let dad pull it out first because that little muscle is squeezing more and more and more and more that poison it and the quicker you get it out the less venom gets in that's how we have to be with bitterness and when we see someone that that stinger is in there we pull it out by God's grace well there are dangerous signs we have to get to communion so it's almost time just a second we have to say no to bitterness every day why and this is where we'll pick up next time number one because bitterness imprisons our emotions have you ever been a bitter person they're imprisoned you don't want to they're almost like and you know they're gonna blow up at any time it's like a hand grenade the pin is off and you're just holding it down with your foot and you don't want to move and you just don't want to get around them because it imprisons their emotions it poisons their life it opens their life to the devil that's what it says in verse 26 and 27 of Ephesians for bitterness opens the door for the devil to come in and influence a believers life and make them act like a pagan a lost person lost people have no capacity to forgive believers do Satan short-circuits us behaving as a believer we become acting like a lost person bitterness closes our life to God it grieves the Holy Spirit and I could read you that and I could read you that but when we come back we're gonna look at how to spot and get rid of the signs lack a concern they're not they're oversensitive they avoid meeting people they hold grudges they end up experiencing mood extremes they're kind of like all over the place they sulk how do we get out of the bitterness trap it's wonderful if if you think about it you have to make a list of people who have hurt you and you have to make another list of things you've done to hurt them and then you take a good look at how you have hurt the Lord and then you pray and ask his forgiveness and then you destroy the files you cannot play for decade old grimacing tapes and relive that's wanting to be confined with whatever has embittered you so what's communion communion is our declaration we choose to be forgiving we've choose we make a mint repentance is a change of mind that leads to a change of behavior at this moment no matter how far I've gone away from the Lord in bitterness it's just one step back of repentance and say I choose because of the grace of God that has brought me salvation to be forgiving of others I ask you pull that bee sting of bitterness out of me and heal me and I release them I mean they probably really did something horrible and God can take care of them better than we ever could and communions when I declare I choose to be forgiving just as God for Christ's sake has forgiven me let's bow forward a prayer as the men go to prepare to serve us let's just ask the Lord to reveal in our hearts and minds if there is even one person that we are holding a lingering smoldering infected attitude about that's poisoning our life and if so say Lord I repent you're right I'm wrong that sin that's poison I hate the solitary confinement of my unforgiving bitterness walled in here and I ask you to set me free that's all it takes in God's grace floods our lives are we enjoying the kind tender forgiving life that Christ bought for us father I pray that as we bow before you that there would be no offense that we're aware of that we have not repented of that we would be like Paul striving to always have a conscience void of these offenses against you or against anyone else and I pray that this would be a communion of the kind and tender-hearted and forgiving ones bless this bread a picture of you taking all of our sins upon your body on the tree and we worship and thank you forever for that in the precious name of Jesus we pray amen

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Keywords: Bible, God, Jesus, Christian, teaching, biblical, teach, sermon, trinity, church, lesson, traditional, truth, true, divine, theology, freedom, guilt, testament, pure, interpret, spirit, holy, John, Barnett, christ, father, heaven, hell, doctrine, doctrinal, sinful, forgive, forgiveness, history, teachings, chapters, verses, discover, the book, ministries, dtbm, Dr. Barnett, controversial, repent, helpful, sin, the, book, dr, john, doctor, barnett, training, videos, series, resources, savior, god, jesus

Id: rwo92ehjgPo

Length: 39min 6sec (2346 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 24 2020