Billie Eilish and Finneas: Paris Meet Up Interview | Apple Music

[Music] Billy Eilish these are the once in a generation moments when a new artist can come through and create a moment bringing everybody together in agreement that the music the message and everything that revolves around it matters this is Billy eyelashes moment and this is my interview with her and brother Phineas right here on Apple music I've had this conversation with quite a few artists throughout my life and we've had varying degrees at this kind of conversation of sort of what does it feel like you know but these moments are pretty rare like I don't want to speak you guys but this is like this is a moment like I feel like there's a lot of people waiting for the Saladin's a lot of people excited about your music and so I guess one more time for the people like how do you feel right now being the kind of person you are the age and point in life that you're at about to kind of do this thing for real cuz I'm not not in this place so you know it's like it's like saying like how does it feel to be you I don't know how it feels to be someone else so I don't know how it feels to be me you know I'm saying and like I don't know I think I just have to sometime just sit back and actually look at what's going on like in Stockholm it was like one of the most like peak I guess life experiences I think we've had and I just was standing on that stage I took my in years out and I just looked at the crowd and they just said to them soaked it in and I just I sort of told them I was like I used to sit in my living room and cry cuz I wanted to this you know and like I never thought in a thousand years happened I thought my door was closed I thought the window was shut you know I was like oh yeah I'm past the point of that happening there's a lot to unpack there I mean first of all let's get back to the good part like why did why was that showing Stockholm so amazing what was it about that one particular night yes there was so much love in that room like I stood at the front of that stage and I just looked at everyone and they just they just screamed and they didn't stop and I didn't even say anything I just kept looking around and every like every time it it became so long that they were screaming they just kept going that's why I asked the question I mean it is a really tough question as any artist like how does it feel when you're at this point where it's about to go gangbusters but you know it's going gang like this is all I keep hearing about of these shows where it's like that every single night it feels like every show of this term we've only done six shows so far of this European tour and every show feels like the the final show like Billy's sort of speech and thank yous at the end of the show like like everybody chokes up and the crowd is like you look out and everybody's eyes are shining and choking up I like every show they all feel like this is it this is the let you know they mean like they feel like a farewell to or end in a weird way it kind of is because although it's like the birth of the album at the end of innocence the end of the first sort of batch of music that we put out even if it stays in the set it's or the end of like this yeah we're playing we've played every song that we have out every night right now because we only have 16 songs out and so as soon as the album launches and it's crafting a set out of that I think it'll be very different but it does have this kind of feeling of like and the tours went on sale long enough ago that I think everyone at these shows is is sort of lifers they're like long-term yeah so what it's probably the end of something special for them too it shows as a fan when you discover something that's really precious to you it's hard to share it it's hard to share it with the world yes there's something else I wanted to ask you about the invention which was on you felt like the door was closed or that the window was closed for you that would come as a surprise to a lot of people because I think they feel like ever since you put out ocean eyes and you guys put that out together and it's being just going one way at what point did you feel like you wouldn't we're gonna get a chance to follow your dreams it was before that I remember it sounds really dumb but I was sitting I was 12 I think and I was sitting in them they're like knows blade seats in Matilda the musical in New York on Broadway and I was miserable I was like I don't give a about musicals why the am I here I was like my mom wouldn't even know literally I wasn't even with my family because they were off I don't even know what and I was with you know like my godmother who's like basically my grandma because all my grandmas are dead and I was sitting we were sitting in the back and I just was like silent miserable completely just not there and I remember just falling in love with what I was watching like Matilda the musical when I was completely against the idea of it and I just loved it and I remember like at the end when everyone was bowing and then little Matilda got up and everyone stood up in the crowd and everyone was cheering I remember like a tear rolling down my cheek cuz I just was like all I've ever wanted is like to be on a stage and have people like cheering for me and what does that come from that that sort of desire for acceptance you know like the applause and the love that comes from people who are kind of strangers in a weird way you know what's the constant for me I think this is very interesting is throughout my life I've talked to so many artists who have said you know it's so weird because it doesn't actually fit my personality tight like if I looked at me on a piece of paper this job is not for me and yet I do it every night and I and I get something from it every night when did you realize that that was something that you were attracted to that idea of applause you know I don't know I always liked it you know I always loved being on a stage and you see a show of could looked at you know it's so funny she was but she was like she always had a beautiful voice but she was like circumstantially shy we'd be at a party and someone big bill you sing and she put a pillow in front of her face and sing like behind the pillow I never wanted to sing for anyone I never was like the kid who's like has to prove to everyone they can sing cuz I never thought of myself as a singer or someone being like oh yeah Billy's a singer and I just was like oh because I remember growing up with kids or like I'm a singer and they were like right yeah it's quite a stage cool thing to say yeah model feels like gauche unless that's like your full-time job like other people decide those things yes people decide if you're a singer I just never thought that that was who I was I didn't everything I did that I just like you know I just did it without realizing and so you know people were like when we would be it like a boy what would be called a grown-up party with our parents and they'd be like and I did not want to but I did though low-key and so I'd I remember stuffing my face into a pillow like you just said and singing like happiness is a warm gun or son [Music] you know I think is really interesting I think about a lot of performers too is that I think a lot of them and this is this is why I think interesting about you a lot of them myself included much more comfortable on a stage performing then than in an audience of any kind I think that's like why a lot of people start DJing they're like I can do this I can like choose what music gets played and I can I know why is that a DJ why because I hate parties yeah yeah so put me behind something where no one can talk to me so I kind of hear you up like I'm working I can't even see your legs it was like wow man you must be like the potty guy I'm like no not the potty guy but I like to control working you're like working at a party I just love music right and I have to be social in my job and so give me something to do right give me something to do with otherwise I miss Daniel I feel like a ventriloquist doll for an hour you know and in a way it can be applied in this direction too because I'm actually very socially awkward individual and yet I love having conversations before when the cameras are on yeah the thing I think is interesting though is that Billy is not that way Billy is a fantastic audience member and loves going to see concerts why I perform the way I do though because growing up all I did was jump the gate between GA and VIP just so I could be right at the front just so I could mosh right it's a really good no you actually you do you perform like a fan yes that's why I perform that way completely it's why I like the show so much you know some of owners got there they're like I've got to create a barrier between the audience and myself and a mystique and it's like now you're in there I perform like I'm right in the pit and I to make everyone who's in the audience if they're not in the fifth feel like they are who are your favorite performers growing up who did you aspire to be like or to be influenced by did you love performers yeah who did you jump the fence to go and see young thug yeah Lil Wayne yeah um Tyler also I'm pretty crazy unbelievable I mean just yeah I'm becoming a broken record about The Odd Future influence no it's it's unreal they changed everything it's unreal you know not not just in terms of this kind of like unbridled creativity in this fearlessness but also the fact that they did it independent they showed kids that you didn't have to play by the rules right you could just go and make these really intense skate videos and put music on them and don't cradle the influential right especially growing up in California yeah they felt like they were down the street influential in like every single place like fashion music in attitude and like style it was it was kind of insane to watch I mean like I was so little when it was all happening but did you have to smuggle like cuz that stuff was intense like I can't imagine you're gonna be like running into the living room well maybe you are and I'm then under estimating your family vibe but I'd imagine running into the living room and plugging in your phone and saying watching this video for Yonkers like it's like as I was always interested in videos and like crazy visuals and I thought Yonkers was like out of this world is out of this world I'm just I'm just like it's interesting like what how would the family dynamic deal with that kind of influence on a kid on someone your age at that moment in time yeah I say I mean that's a good question because I don't really remember I just remember being so excited about three thousand five by childish game you know that video just like blew my mind I remember showing everyone and it's the sweatpants video and like the sober video and like what was the music you hid from your parents like growing up do you don't I mean less was their stuff that you were like oh my god I'm listening this because yes I'm trying to get to because it sounds like you go for such an open environment in terms of creative like anything creative goes no matter how old you are just go for it right but what did it I'm trying to think it's kind of an open book hungry pretty I don't really keep things to myself yeah a lot of the time I have now from the internet because I realized that they're not into that but yes the internet just doesn't take opinions very well what's cuz it has a lot of opinions you know exactly but I was coming to what it's called democratization opinion huh but in real life I've always kind of just said the things I'm thinking and done the things I wanted to do and like never really hid I think when when there were times when I probably should have you know maybe I listened to waka flocka in the car with my mom and dad and like not the clean versions like when I was like 12 and stuff hard and the paint was just blaring with all my friends and they'd be like this is scary and you know it's like you know you like on to something when your friends are intimidated by what you play and I know your parents but your friends are like I'm not sure that what about you though Phineas what were you Harding I think just like anything like when I was really young like anything that had like overtly like like just like sexual undertones or like super profane and stuff yeah like any derogatory stuff just when I was like eight or nine there's a hot if he you cuz you with the older kids he would first do this yeah yeah for sure and I think I just was like I like I'm you I like they loved you so much more real but no I think just anything that I was like I know I love this but I don't I don't know how my parents are gonna feel about it you know just that like the way that all kids are when they like I think I don't want my you know parents to find out because they just don't know what's going on was it intimidating for you wanting to pursue your own creative interests knowing that your brother was older than you and doing it are probably achieving things first it was um I mean there was a lot of there was a lot of jealousy growing up from my side because you know he was he's out there he was out there he was doing his thing you you know he had a band and he would do like he play gigs all the time you he was you know on all these TV shows that I liked and he was you know and you know everything and I wasn't really and I was really jealous and also like I don't know I danced and I wrote horses and I I don't know what I did I just I don't know I was always really jealous and they always liked him more than me that's so much no it's so true Finn it literally is and it will find that it is cuz Here I am I'm good now and it's you know it's funny about it Phineas as well is it that's such a brotherly thing to say an older brother Lee thing to ser an older sibling thing to say but it's actually a very common thing when you're the youngest cuz I was the youngest and I'd be like damn I'm never gonna be good as good at sports as my brother I'm never gonna be as good at this this and this it's a weird dynamic it's you like your oldest morresy do I like my oldest more yeah what do you mean like do you like your oldest child more than the youngest without a shadow of a doubt but I I do definitely see that dynamic playing out sometimes right you know first through the door bloodied and bruised second through the door it's all been done before all right so there's it works on both sides do you not I mean from your perspective making music did you always recognize something in belly that she even necessarily doubted we talked about the doubt and the fear of not being out of achieve did you see it I don't I don't know how much Billie doubted what I felt like I saw in her but I definitely always was like she's so unbelievably talented and you know like I would say like super kind of cocky outrageous things to her in it like without much IRA irony like I remember before we started making music being like yeah let's make you like a superstar like I remember saying some crazy thing like that but I don't but it wasn't like a real I don't know I totally know what you mean and like I'm not saying that like if it hadn't like if our music hadn't worked I wouldn't have been like oh my god what happened but I will say that like it's never seemed like unbelievable to me because I just think she's so talented and like I'm like yeah of course she's so good you know and her eye is so good and all her visuals like her sensibility like to me it's like it all makes sense yeah I want to get to when we get outside I wanna start talking about the journey to the album because I really feel like what you've made on this album is just such an incredible complete body of work and not just to listen to but you can see it before you even see it thanks get out of here the conversation continued as we ventured out into the streets of Paris trying to find locations that felt see me but also kind of private but what is private these days when you're Billy Eilish so we've relocated to the streets of Paris see the kids already know always the kids already not you know what's really amazing right now is on the kind of audience that your music is appealing to you know it's your age group and younger it's kids who are kind of listening to your lyrics and your songs and absorbing them in a really meaningful way right how much access to that reaction do you have because you make the music and release that are you able to see how it's being received by your player audience outside of gigs I actually love like watching reaction videos I think it's so interesting to see the way people interpret yeah your art and like for me I feel like whenever I'm asked you know what is this what is everything overall like me what is this song what is it about it in the deference I feel like for this album especially was like very a friend for instance it's for me I love the this is my theory so much that I don't want to give away what it is yeah and take away the the opportunity of like you know what this is what I think she's talking about this is what I think she's yeah she means by this we definitely don't like cop-out on on versus you don't even like we're always trying to say something so I think it's great that people are trying to interpret them and yeah I mean I agree I think I think the the best example of that is like any time a kid shows up at a show and they have a tattoo of a lyric in one of our songs like I'm like that's great and they're like yeah and they give us like the explanation of what it means to them yeah that's maybe maybe it has nothing to do with what we thought it wasn't we wrote it but it's like I'm Way experienced right longs to you now you have a tattoo of that lyric yeah yeah yeah which lyrics do you think have resonated the most as far which lines do you see pumpin up with people were faring to a lot and as long as you've already released I think a big one has been if I loved you as a promise would you break it if you're honest why do you think that that is resonating to that degree there must be one who's who thought of that one was just I feel like I mean it just is what it is like you just listen to it and it I think you can understand that no matter what your situation is or what yeah their life is at all you know what I'm saying does it surprise you when you write words like that when they come out of you sometimes it does and especially when he does you know because again like you know Phineas started writing music before I did this where he's four years older than me he started when he was like 12 or something and he was so good immediately at 12 like like I still I have his notebook that he wrote those first songs in like I read the lyrics sometimes and it's just like shocking to me that he was he was writing from this place of like having been alive for four hundred years ago and it's like it just was so unreal to me and and then sometimes it's true I feel like I write stuff that I'm like where did that come from it's crazy like I listen to some of these songs that you know and I can't work out yet who's writing why that's good that I don't know that's the way you want it that's the point yeah yeah that's that's the idea we're doing our job if that's the case yeah and it differently is like I can't go oh that's a thin liner that's a billy line because it all closes wineries but you know the the the effort I just think you guys put into making sure the narrative of these songs is seen through like the detail of these of these lines like changing the words not to nerd out to however changing key words on courses rather than just repeating over and over again flipping them changing the meaning of them so I just feel like you go on this journey in your songs you know and if you come to the end of it and you feel complete either completely sad well completely angry will completely validated but you feel complete something yeah that's awesome to hear I mean no lyric is is too small to being concerned about I remember there's a song on on the new album called A&E and I remember that song had been written we were we were in Europe in February right now a year ago right and the song had been written like two months earlier like we wrote it in December but we just hadn't gotten like one rhyme on them that was one great write not do it sat for how we got it I think we got it right in in Oslo on like a Europe tour last year but it was like the fact that we even what was the line pleaded Assange was yet please don't please don't we already had was please don't try to kiss me on the sidewalk down in Silverlake that was the line and then we changed it to please don't try to kiss me on the sidewalk on your cigarette break for me like there was some I kept wanting to be like I want to write it but I want to say you know how can we say that this person has cigarette breath do we say with your cigarette bread like it's not it doesn't sound right and I kept we kept having all these different ones I was like your cigarette breath your you know your your coughing on me or some weird could not do it and you know please don't try to kiss me on the sidewalk on your cigarette break I know and it's all the points like it really is kind of like a desperately sad image in so many different ways yeah just the sort of notion of like just people poisoning themselves you take 10 minutes to kill yourself a little bit yeah and you want to share with me why why would you do that so the album starts with a whole bunch of exclamation points and probably the most teenage thing I've ever heard on a record in my life it literally is like I mean I don't know why you started your debut album proper with that but it cracks me up every time I hear it I think to disarm no I think it was like well no the real reason is because every time we would sit down to record you had to take it out I had to take it out yeah I was like I was like this is like this is Billy is like Lil Wayne lighter flick like you know how like every low in like that's Billy is like pulling out it's not gonna stick like the lightest leg does you're gonna be like can we drop the Invisalign gag cuz that's the only like we there was a moment where I was like let's put this at every song like you know like this goes with Tokyo Maybach Music yeah misaligns have just gone through the wrong but I think it was really like I mean it's it there's a lot of still paying for it yeah there's a lot of darkness on this album and in sort of its themes and motifs because of just like the things that we've seen and felt inspired to write about and talk about in the last year but I think one of the nicest things about starting it that way to us was like I think you you really get people's attention if you can make them laugh or if you can entertain them or amuse them yeah I think you're like things are more serious if you're laughing also yeah you've been doing that for a while I mean putting the words psyche which I don't think anyone's used since 1999 in a song was really funny to me and then Horsa like even in the first song and and bad guy you know when you do the DA like that's just a way of I guess lightening the fact that that's actually a pretty sadistic tune yeah and that's the thing about your songs as well as that you're not afraid to be mean do you know what I mean oh for sure for sure it's part of human nature I think at times is to be mean either been fun toe behind people's backs and you put it in front of the entire world right it seems to be a part of what this whole kind of initial Billie experience is is like we should we should have trust issues with you do you know what I mean a little bit through the music sure there's a lot of miss some what's the word I don't know what the word is but there's a lot of lying also yeah like on purpose and it's like it's not like how rappers lie in their music because they think it it sounds dope it's not bad at all it's more like I don't know making a character out of yourself I was gonna use the wick I'm glad you use the word character because it's really hot word to use around artists man I've got myself in trouble stirring that around before like this character you seem to be playing like it's not this in a server it's a rat yeah I wondered we really do and it's do you discuss the the attributes of the character before you write a lot for a party favor which was on you know the EP like that one we were I don't even know how what we started with but I don't remember anything before we were like let's write a song that's about you know breaking up with someone in a phone call in a voice message not even a phone call on their birthday yeah and then it really guided the song you know it like gives you rights it superiors it does it completely gives you the fact that you didn't actually announce that it was the person's birthday until quite a way through the song it's just such a yeah brutal moment these I mean these are brutal characters you guys invent these are these are I mean there's a darkness to your music that I think has really captured people's attention because pop music by its very nature is trying to capture the perfect emotion and emotions are pure but these are complicated feelings in these songs right not to overcook it but you know it's like there are some real you guys are writing it down these ending song some of them are us - a lot of them are us yeah there's you know the song ate off of the army which is a very sort of sort of almost like on your knees soundcloud loop type song that song I wrote from the perspective of somebody that I hurt so that's not even like I feel like when people hear that song you're like I look for baby Billie she's so hurt and it really was just I was a kid for a minute I really was and I the only way I could deal with it was to just stop for a second and put myself in that person's you know placed it's as long as you empathizing yeah it's me empathizing and the thing is that every lyric in that song is towards me so this is kind of like self it was whilst almost helping somebody else at the same time yeah I get it yeah so how many songs this gets over to some of the facts how many songs did you guys work on or deal with near completion that you chose from to make 14 on this album 13 and then we split the beginning of that guy into two tracks that's that's the number there was no no help me I'm always shocked when I hear when I hear that artists wrote 70 songs for a 10 song album like on one hand I understand it because writing songs is so fun but man we just want to get each one right and we don't want them to step on each other we also I feel like we're learnt I don't know I feel like I've noticed that a lot of artists kind of just make songs all the time they're always making music they're always in the studio they have all these like random songs that are half undone in half whatever and like that's cool but for us I feel like we almost never do that I feel like when we finish a project we don't have any other songs it is kind of the anti now like in a way I think that now that the distribution the way that you can get your music in front of your fans is so much easier and so much more direct there is this thing of like well I don't even want to start creating and I didn't want to start releasing so we are just getting this kind of influx of a huge amount of music all the time it's it's very anti what's happening now with a lot of artists like you said focusing on like one song getting it absolutely but it's hot but can you let go of a song of it's not working I mean how long will you stick it out for you said you had what song was it was it zanny that took months and months I mean that took so long that song is it to her like and and when the party's over just to get from the time that that song was written and then we were sort of playing it as an acoustic unreleased song live this time last year to the to actually being recorded and coming out with such a long process of second-guessing it trying to get it right just what you guys do in terms of like capturing them each moment is there's so much reduction in the music is so much about the vocal performance so much space given to the vocal performance the way you treat the vocals everything is done in a way that kind of puts the performers front and center and that's not easy that's really hard to get that balance right so much easier to throw at it bill bill bill bill bill hey it's a big track you guys do it so differently like it's so much I even bad guys like it's not a lot going on in it there's like nothing on it there's a kick drum and a bass guitar it's like it really hone in on things yeah you know we don't we don't make a hundred songs and then then we focus on Penza we make ten songs or less and then you know we we build from what we have we don't really make a bunch and then pick something [Music] for our third location it was time to talk specifically and in depth about the forthcoming new album when we all fall asleep where do we go I wanna talk about one song that really is like a like a brilliantly composed kind of modern unrequited love song like I'm not getting the attention that I need from you and I really wish I was and on top of that I really wish you were gay which is the you know the name of the song and just just tell us the story about that song because you know it's super charming that this really is like thank you I mean when someone doesn't want you back yeah you you you think about why yeah you start thinking oh my god it's because I do this it's because I have this I look like this I say this I said this I did that is all about you it's all about you you don't even think about whether you like them you know I'm saying yeah I feel like we're also focused on when people don't want us back and especially if you're in love with someone who's not in love with you your mind truly be in love with someone if they're not in love with you back I just love it I agree with you I think around like it's like you know you're right but but yeah unless you experience it back that's true love but finding someone attractive right matic and shinned exciting to you for sure right getting nothing back you can really you can be in love with someone who does not in love with you but you can't be in love with them yeah that's interesting you know because I was in love with that man Justin Bieber I will tell you that and I'm that was not fake at all I'm telling you bro that we're not getting into that I've done it before I'm not doing it again but the thing is with with wish you were gay it's like it's a selfish song it's a goofy selfish joke you know it's like I wish from my own sake that you didn't like me because you don't like girls not because it's anything to do with me don't worry it's not personal at all it's because I don't like any girls at all in the whole world you know and if I did maybe we'd have a chance but as it turns out I'm just not built that way actly exactly did you even for one second thing like should we write this like if this it was the last line of the Sun like we versus and Billy already had the whole chorus yeah with I just want to make you feel okay but all you do is look the other way I can't tell you how much I wish I didn't want to stay and we were just like what's the what is it and we had everything else and we were like I just kind of wish you were gay like I wish that I would say just all end yeah be like I'm gay I'm gay go away you're sick you don't have to go through like excellent explaining like what it is about me that you don't like and I don't have to you know take it personally at all and we can be so supportive of each other we can be friends we mean like I feel like you know but but yeah I think you're definitely like we didn't want to trivialize I think it's so something that obviously isn't a choice it's so obvious that it's not offensive or it's not it if it's not I'm not saying that something isn't offensive obviously it's that's up to whoever is being offended by it but I just mean like it's so clear that it's not it's not an insult and it's not like I don't know I don't know and I also feel like it's also you can relate to it no matter what I feel like you know I grew up with this girl that was like a best friend of mine and she liked girls and she would when we made this song she loved it because you know she was in love with the girl who didn't like girls and it's the same kind of thing I wish you were gay how I wish she was straight I wish you were yeah exactly exact all that Bieber Wow Wow hey have you met him no I don't want to meet him that dude doesn't and that dude does not want to beat me me I can tell you that really so it's still deep oh its deepest deep its deep and I'm you know what I'm gonna leave him alone he needs to do his thing he is got PTSD running through his blood I already know the first question I asked you right which is the most probably the most cliche hopefully the most cliche question of the day was how does it feel this is the thing this is the kind of misses like this is a rare moment when you know this albums gonna come out and if what you want to happen comes actually happens lots and lots of people are gonna love it like you don't want people to not love it no true no I don't right so a lot of people love it it comes with this sense of like being on and I mean we're on right now obviously we're doing this in public and there's some fans hanging about and it's cool and everything else but this may not even be possible in six months I'm not trying to scare you but it's kind of a thing you got a point and you wanted this right you used to cry and when you were young and like I want this so bad like was it this no wasn't this no I don't know what it was it's weird because it's not that I don't enjoy what I do it's not like I don't hate what I do and I don't hate you know I love so much of what I do so much that I kind of forget that I do because it's all that I do you know but and it's not that I don't like it it's that it's disappointing fame is not what you think it is famous pretty disappointing is great if I'm being honest with you fame is just so disappointing but I'm like I love it so - so first I don't know how to describe it man yeah cuz I'm that's good in fact the famous disappointing is good now you know the reality now I know the reality I'm not it's just I don't even know it's unfair though cuz I I don't like I don't have to wear it the way that Billy has to wear it did you want it when you are kid I think in the way that youth that you sort of personify famous success right and then I think as you get older you realize that sometimes they go together and sometimes they don't and for me there are so many metrics of like achievement that don't include it but I just mean that like you know we've made this album together in tandem spending like days in a bedroom together and it's Billy's beautiful voice singing it and it's her incredible creative vision on all of the videos and all the artwork and it is it is unfair though that I get to kind of turn it off and go to the mall when I want to and she doesn't you know that's that's tough and I don't I don't take that for granted I really am grateful for that and I don't I mean look around yeah if I you know where we are right now if I go out you know like Sunday in LA I can walk around Paris you know I'm saying yeah and I get to and so that's like that's tough you know and so funny because the dynamic is that you're the most common dynamic shift when you have siblings or best friends in a situation where one gets more attention than the other is a good person who's not getting the attention becomes jealous so it's kind of again you guys are so auntie you know it's like the whole dynamic that you have of like unhappy just being in the process to a degree in sharing and the experience and a wave like in control and yet you're starting to feel a little bit out of control right sobriety control yeah yeah but this is what it comes with you know yeah you want to dye your hair blue you want to with some bright trousers you know you want to rock this vibe that's what happens I mean I want to get you know I want to be successful I just want to be successful so let's talk a little bit about that about the relationship that you have on the road with your family and your mom is here there's always somebody with you obviously if it makes perfect sense at this stage in your life it's really important but do you think about what that will feel like when it's like time for mom to not come on the road would ever be a time right when you you sort of grow beyond that it has to be right there has to be I mean there will be a time when we're not always together yeah that's how life works that's my next question sure I mean it's just like it's it's not something to dwell about you know it's like we can't have this be the rest of our lives we were talking about it the other day which is like we have to I'm 17 dude I can't have my life exactly like this forever and he can't either you know he's just become like an adult he just got a house like he has a girlfriend and like wants a dog you know what I'm saying and it's like things that we it's weird it's a weird balance because I want to grow in my life and grow up and have a life but I already have my career yeah it's weird because my friends who you know I grew up with and stuff there they have jobs at like Jamba Juice and and now they're you know which is great and totally which is no but that's what I'm saying it's like they have a job as normal they have a job in some stores and they're about to go to college and they're excited and they don't and they're excited and it's just like there's nothing wrong with that and there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing it's just different can you relate to each other still you must have friends that you stole cans those that goes beyond jobs or careers or any of that stuff um there's about two and how many did you have before a lot more watch a lot nobody there's only a few people in the world that can understand this and there's you know there are some things in life that you just can't understand unless you see it right in front of you having a kid having someone die Fame and like heartbreak probably yeah depression yeah any form of that yeah I don't know yeah the cookie making is if the byproduct of any of those things not working or going well just can't understand it and you can't act like you do when someone you love loses someone very close to them you can't say I feel you you just can't and that's okay you don't have to be like I understand when you don't you can it's just about listening it's it's I feel like some people just try to act like they know but just listen it's it's not about trying to up their depression it's not about who's sadder who's who's gone through worse it's about listening to people and actually just caring about them so you're gonna tour a lot on this record you're already touring I mean most people put the out not into it you know I feel like you have been touring so I feel like it's just touring non-stop it's yeah we have like a love-hate relationship with tor I think the shows are amazing and until they get to see the world but I think there's it's a real feeling of isolation on tour yeah especially when you're actually dealing with the things you guys talked openly about in this conversation which is like you know how much attention to it but like being in a depressed state of some description and being in a room on your own in a city you don't know yep lonely it's lonely with your whole family around that's weird you know I think I think you're absolutely right it's like I feel so lucky but like that like be with my sister cuz we're best friends and everything but even then it's like if we're both feeling isolated and we're both feeling yeah yeah well like neither one of us is gonna be able to reach down and pull the other one out from that so yeah it's tough and then and then you have shows also everyone back home forgets about you and it's not like when I was when we were about to leave for this tour that was the main thing that was stressing me out and and just making me feel gone which was that having been on tour I know how it's how it works and I know that you leave yeah and it's a little bit of your friends being sad and then you're gone for long enough that life moves on and they keep doing things and it's it's the same way it's the same way as if someone dies you have to keep going it's not like you shouldn't be mourning them every two seconds and like for the rest of your life you have to keep going but it's like you know I remember hearing like we're not gonna do that yeah you are it's not like I can do anything about it and it's not bad it's actually a good thing that's how life works but it's just the reality of it see you recorded an album in a bedroom I mean talk about leaving you literally lived your bedroom and went out to the world I mean it's not like you know what I mean like that's a that's a harsh John we didn't we didn't like move to LA to try to make music we grew up in like a suburb of LA and we made music in the bedroom and then wouldn't have moved to LA to music oh no what the hell I love Los Angeles but but yeah I mean it's tricky and then and then there are these shows that are life-changing peak life experience shows and the people that are that are coming to see the shows you know make everything feel more important than the two of us and and you know so profound and those are the reasons to do it you know I think we often joke that we don't really like days off very much you know you don't like days they don't have a show or a component of that's when we really get in our heads to those time off is like dreadful yeah when you're doing a show you have that you have to focus on that and to put on the best show you can every night once the show's over that's you know you're you're you've accomplished your your work of the day but uh yeah you know when one of the last questions I want to ask you guys is why why do you think why we why were your homes go why were you in a situation early in life where you were given a chance to kind of live that life um Phineas was such a weirdo he would have been bullied and I was would have been a bully no literally honestly one 100% I would have been a bully and he would have been bullied it was like singing around the corner of life no I mean I don't know why our parents decisive film schools I mean really mend it um I don't know because I feel like I'm too stupid to homeschool my kids but I do recommend it because I loved it I loved it and I hate school too please do it's gonna hate it it's great but it also depends on how you homeschool because you know some people will just take their kids out of school and like make them be home all day and that's not what we did you know I feel like I've met people who like I was home-schooled for a year and I was like oh you weren't what you do and they were like I just sat home for a year and did nothing and it was horrible hmm and that's that's not how it should be and it wasn't like that for us it was more about specific curriculum and what you thought your parents about you should learn and what we wanted to learn yeah yeah yeah because school I mean again I we've never I've never been to school so I can't say it's bad or it's good or whatever like I don't have an opinion really but I feel like what I've seen is that it it just forces you to learn things that you don't know if you would want to learn otherwise from if you start if you're really young and you don't have even time to think about what it is that you think is cool and you're you you're they shove down your throat and you have to learn it hmm it's like what if what if you wanted to learn math I think you're right on time and there's a lot because there's a lot of conversations about curriculum reform that are getting louder and louder because I think that they're taking a look at the kind of the way the subjects are grouped together and the way that the kids are being taught and and they're tracing that these initial decisions back a long long time before things have changed and you know what's in your hands you just reach for your hand you know for your pocket you instinctively put out your phone are we for one or two or three reasons either it's getting a little hectic outside this interview or I'm getting a little cold in a bit bored or did I get it man I get it so but it's that's the reason I raise it apart from the fact that we're almost done is is because it's that's the instinctive thing that's like the purchase is it or is it just part of the evolution of what we're capable of and how we consume I honestly don't know it's both a maybe it's both I mean it's got a little trash on it we're like like communicating more than we've ever communicated ever in the history of the species and we are saving lives doing saving lives reliving worse at communicating we're communicating more and we're worse at communicating because we're we're supplying less empathy were being were being more like braggadocious about our achievements and art there's there's no social etiquette on on Instagram of not like bragging about everything that you've achieved even if your whole day was terrible but you went to a restaurant and paid a lot of money for a for dinner you're gonna post about the dinner you know I mean there's such a weird sort of like facade of of kind of we've become more consumed with the vicarious nature of our service in almost the nature in itself which to some degree bring a full circle you know kind of shields us from acknowledging these depressive feelings or these states that are very human it's really true right and we're not actually going into it you're supposed to go into it a little bit I think yeah it's really true I think that's like you know I think if there's anything that that I'm proud of to have done on a broader scale with the music that Billy and I have made it's to not shy away from like songs about self-loathing and insecurities and frustration and and and that anyone would empathize with those to me is like yeah cuz we feel that way for sure you know I think that's that's when you've like achieved something in music is when you when you've supplied empathy for people what's the thing you're most proud of so far what the music you made or what you've achieved album or otherwise hmm probably the fan base I think it's just a an army of real people and open-minded people and and I'm not even saying I'm I feel like if I said I'm proud of it it almost sounds like I am the only reason it exists it's not true it's it's them you know they these kids come came over here I'm not like hello I'm over here come you know what I'm saying like it's just like I don't know I don't know proud why not well [Music] I don't know what you're talking about crowd we grew up no I'm not gonna see that's the perfect thing to end on well we were up never being told that anyone was proud of us our parents never said I'm proud of you never not once not once and for us we took it personally and we took it like oh my god our pence was but what I'm feeling I'm more and more you know I'm understanding more and more as I get older is that it was more like our parents didn't didn't want us to feel like them being proud of us was the only way that we could accomplish things so if I said I'm proud of something that I've done I don't want to say that because it's because I've kind of learned from what I grew up being butthurt about and how it kind of actually turned out to be kind of good in a way it's like being told that someone loves you verse like knowing that they love you without having to hear that I think that was their approach always was like we don't need to tell you we're proud of this accomplishment because you know that everything that you do is something that we're proud of and prideful of and I think that that's like it's definitely like translated into the rest of our lives of like doing things for the sake of doing them and doing things for the sake of you know being excited about them and you know just like the love of things as opposed to pleasing other people yeah this is the out room it's like when there's like a long like a long-lost refreshed it now for the last two minutes but I just can't repress it anymore [Music] you

Channel: Apple Music

Views: 2,000,957

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Id: HyTiK6XjBi0

Length: 50min 42sec (3042 seconds)

Published: Mon Apr 08 2019