Bill Cosby: 49 (1987)

[Music] [Music] [Applause] [Applause] thank you [Music] this life is very very funny to me now it's the only way I can look at it because if if I become deadly serious about it I would have to reconstruct myself I'm 49 years old it's it's a reality 49 I'm jogging jogging out on the street running and low pain went into the into the knee and look felt like a knife you know and I said whoa what is what is that you know I mean when I was younger you know something like that happened I just say you know I can't do that at 49 your leg you do like that and they say what's the matter with you didn't you hear us when we first spoke to you make it deeper and I'm angry I'm angry with it now because this is the body and I was an athlete and I know if something like that hurts you just take it kick it out even harder yeah laughs and then it went down here went down to the ankle and ankle turned over and then it came up to the hip and I had it in the hip and then the knee and then that then the whole leg was like this and all of a sudden I came to my senses and I said stop and I walked and then and it didn't hurt when I walked I said well it must be all right so I started to run again every day well everything came right back and a Reba hey get a little twitch in the shoulder when I was at my 26 oh God cuz what's that right you know 49 happened then it went down to my hand I tried to shake that out and went round in the back and my leg went out again and my body said I'm not fooling and I said yes sir you little thing underneath here when I'm running stop yes sir what do you want to do sit down we're right here that's fine you can't do that you got to rebut Hayes making noises now noises my father used to make [Applause] my father had a body like this one when I first noticed had a gut and he had things on the side when you took his shirt off his slices are all up here he put on a shirt and and the shirt went all the way down and covered up his belt and he'd sit in the position like this and it would come down and all of it was smooth the whole shirt smoothed out all and I could hear him sit down yeah he'd sit down you get up and made even morning and I was in my teens and I'd look at my scar I never thought I never thought that at one time when my father was 17 he had a great body and I never thought that I would inherit that body but it's here now that forty nine body lost my pecs don't have any pens used to have great pecs only thing left now here - dark dots but certainly not anything there that'll help to lift when I was young I ate two stakes football training table two steaks didn't chew em just ate them giving them Wow how people says oh look at that boy hyoeun hyoeun potatoes right never tasted the thing took two quarts of milk how did it have I give it all to get help in the outhouse crank it so fast got a headache across the clothes this I desert go up to the things where I'd like three slices of cake oh look at that boy in one small bird that's all what that was I never never everything was flat never showed a hump or anything now 49 have a roll things for us to grow gas starts to come up raise my right arm to get rid of it get a group of 49 50 year old people sitting there talking it all up going so I can whiplash [Applause] now I think there's a period this period of 49 on to whatever and then and then it goes away it goes away because my father's in his seventies now and and he doesn't have any of that he just he comes in he's asthmatic he doesn't have a gut anymore his body's just lemony as is not a diet it's just a natural thing he eats less each little eats like a bird don't need to my remember my father being very proud of himself he says you know I've never been full now just a little bit of this and a little pinch of that and something and he gets up and no I'm for dad don't you want some pot no no no pie thank you it isn't because his doctor said it's just he just doesn't have that appetite but now I want to eat I love to eat I mean it's just a moment man come on dear let's go out to a restaurant sit there and look at that menu I will have there so for me they put on pasta pit please how do you do that well we put it in the little sauce of the song to faith in you pull a small for good yeah that's what I opened close it enough said here that's all I do I would I just want to see it and it comes in sizzling in the sea and it sauce and things just even bald my goodness gracious look around you didn't take the bread take that bread this is good bread bread tear that bread puller and it says hop around lately this is so I don't look too bad leave the little finger up you know you try to look nice about the whole thing now it's sitting there me go to the Italian restaurant Italian restaurants they they don't do they're never finished with what you're eating they bring it to you sorry there you have the pasta everything and you go right you know and you start to dig in this would you like a little no no thank you guys really then you start anything would you like a little bit anytime they're always putting something on it as you eat your little I know that's gonna be eat seven bowls of pasta just sitting right there this is a picture of a man with great guilt because I've just killed myself hope it doesn't go to my heart right away finish dinner perhaps walk home if the restaurants close enough walk home back to the house take off the clothes that's the difficult part clothes oh yes ever 38 inch waist not bad when I look at myself I suck in so it isn't that bad I've learned to look at myself and say not bad not bad suck in turn sideways not bad not really bad 38 inch waist go to get Underpants wear jockey shorts by 34 [Applause] 34 - say they will stretch out to about 50 like a pair jockey short what size sir 34 so would you like him gift-wrapped put the jockey shorts on and around this part very very tight cutting the blood off meg getting numb take a pair of scissors cut him up the side let the leg breathe didn't know that fat collected here I wish there was a way to sit on the toilet with clothes on because when you naked you see it all and especially in this position and you look down and you see this fat just back and you look up you say I don't believe that it's right there all of us sitting right there and I know it's fat cuz I pinched it and it doesn't hurt that has no nerve and I just pinched it get out of here and I get up put those Underpants on and the the elastic which is about an inch wide an inch and a half goes all the way around and that presses so underneath that fat that pokes out and and above it is the pushing up of the fat so you get my trousers which are 36 putting a lot of pressure on the button suck in fasten it and you can feel pants going and and then the little metal thing little metal things gone opening up on just start nothing open up just hold on boys I'm going to dinner going to dinner thank goodness the stomach's way up here take a while before it comes down here but all I'm doing is when I eat I fill this out so that this is all smooth and round get up sound like my father now you come home get undressed food is here fat is here you bend over and my stomach is mashing against my thigh and I can get it down and do my is everybody just do it with one hand can't do it get do it with two Maggie I feel lazy gonna pop up sit back and rest whoo want to talk to God if you don't mind God who could you just may either give me longer arms or put the feet up here that way I could take the shoes off and not press on anything climb into the bed like this and see this thing I've got to lose weight start to turn and this starts to go before me I looked in the mirror when I was 217 my navel was all the way in the back I could put my finger this far into my navel my navel does not want to see light anymore and the most embarrassing thing and Mors and triglycerides or cholesterol the thing that started me on the diet was the day I came out of the shower most most embarrassing time of my life I got out of the shower grabbed the towel dry myself off that's fine pick up his toothbrush knocked it on the floor bent over to pick it up and water about a half a cup of water came out of my navel and it was loud when it hit the floor - and I said no no no this is it I gotta get in shape go on a diet 49 hairlines receding yeah lost about about a quarter of an inch up here just keeps going back I keep looking at pictures of myself sometimes go holding it up look at ya there it is going back little dips and stuff for showing up and I never saw before when I was combing it hairline receding not growing hair up here anymore yet I'm still growing hair don't understand that why is it that I can't grow hair up here I'm growing hair in places where I don't need hair I was shaving looking in the mirror and on this part of my ear I swear to you on this part of my there was a hair about two inches long sticking straight out just as proud and I looked at it I said are you lost what is the reason for this you know I've not bumped into any walls or anything there's no need for tentacles you know what I mean hair and my nose forget it this stuff grows I mean if I don't cut this every three hours I can get a foot I mean I can get stuff hanging down here but I can't get anything up here I cut the hairs around three o'clock went on dinner business shower chain went to dinner came back and I take off my clothes I go in the bathroom and there's a gray one hanging straight up I said how long have you been there he's it all through dinner my eyes my eyes my mom I'm not going blind just as I can't see like I used to anybody here to have Drive vocals anybody who tried vocals trifocals I guess it's new or something put in some try vocals might get my eye doctor you need dr old i said what for he said while you can we'll fix these so you can see way far away so then in the middle you'll pick up things about fifty feet away say then down here you can read your medicine [Applause] I'm sending the chair he gives me the exam is okay that's fine now read to read 450 feet away and I'm going xt y OU h p4 okay now read John said take it okay grind them up I come back two days later put the glasses on Maori we do the whole thing fine okay trifocals I can see any distance you want you name it I'll see it you know I get up to leave and the door was way I just man I don't remember the door being all the way down so I started walking you know just get ready for a long walk that's all and then I passed it I look back around in the knob was right here oh yeah I open the door I go out to get the elevated elevators our way what did they change this building so I put my ring out to press the button I'm right on it [Music] now the elevator door opens and there's about four people anything but their way I love that I see why you are way back there but this the thing to step on is up here I said golly that they ought to fix this thing you have to get up this high and when I did that if this is a New York City I did that in the people I don't kill us please I don't shut up I'm trying to get it in its elevated so somebody help me please so so the people people took my leg you know I mean they helped me and you know I said now wait a minute take it easy I don't want to hurt myself the doors closed and they were right here I swore this thing is really something man I've backed up and they were right there now the doors open and I look at now I gotta go why this about a three mile walk revolving door so I go around the revolving door and I come outside traffic as well but the curb was up here and I got across the street so I got down on the ground I'm trying to get over this thing man so somebody tapped me on the shoulder sir mr. Cosby I'm kidding around it was a giant eye that's why I don't sign my eyes I sign the thing did a big pad nice stepped off the curb it was really big was an eyebrow so I said to the eyebrow please take you to a phone I wanna call my wife so the guy walked with me in the phone booth lose weight but we got there in two steps that's why I must be walking good so I got some change my hand but then I looked at a corner trying to find the hole the hole was this big man picked up the phone I dialed my wife 9 my wife picked up the phone I said dear I have these glasses on and dr. Porter got trifocals and I swear it's dangerous I'm gonna get killed out here I'm at 46 in Lexington please come and get me before I get run over so my wife said idiot take the glasses off and come home [Applause] but see the beauty and the fun of it is is when you're young you really don't think that these things are gonna hit you you have no concept of it hitting you I remember sitting in my grandparents home and my grandmother my grandmother was sewing something and she said she said would you do this for grandmommy please and I took that needle man and I didn't understand why her eyes were like that I went good understand pulled it right around they are grandma called me anytime you know ya don't even bring me a needle now I have to start with my glasses and that's another thing you you wear glasses and then you lose them can't find them I lost my glasses like this one time and I was mad to one somebody took my glasses people always moving things every time moving something every time I put something down people moving that's why I can't find stuff the people would leave stuff where I put it and they said what are you looking for and I wouldn't tell them no because when you tell them something said we put it where it belongs so I don't want to hear anything I'll find my glasses they've got to be around here somewhere glasses and people touch things and always taking something Who am I in this house anyway Who am I act like I'm some crazy person or something protect me from myself we put it where it belongs weird laws can't glasses drop now where did I put the darn things and I walk past the mirror so I'm not telling anybody I'm not gonna tell anybody about this yeah eyes hair body mind that's the worst part can't stop it either it's not senility my grandfather told me about senility I'm not worried about that my grandfather said you become see now you won't know it [Applause] this when I was 15 years old I remember listening to my mother and father's friends 40 year old old people and they said you know my mind is playing tricks on me and I thought that was the dumbest thing I've ever heard in my life I didn't say anything to them but it doesn't make sense how can your mind play tricks on you if your mind is inside of your skull it can't whisper without you hearing it or understanding so how did it help can it play tricks on you stupid I was 15 it's not in the medical report that I tell myself to go get something and I'm excited about getting it I've walked farther in my house at age 48 because I told myself to go get something and then when I got to the room I couldn't remember why no no no no this is serious this is serious because it isn't like my wife said to get it so I said well it's not important now remembered when I'm ready I told myself to get up and it wasn't that I walked three miles and had time to forget it was a short walk it was from here over to here in my house how can I forget why I set myself after something that was important but something that happens I walked farther in that house whether it's upstairs or do another room to get there and then not know why I'm here but my body is excited about getting it my body says we're here pick it up and I said pick up one I'm talking to myself my body's here picking up and I'm saying why am I here and my body said I don't know my job is just to pick up things and my eyes they tried to be so nice they said well let's look around for maybe we'll find it and I said good find what am i I said we don't know our job is just to look around I said then why did you bring it up in the first place and minds it because we're tired of your arguing and so I stand there in the room and I'm making circles looking around for something I don't know what the hell I'm looking for and I get the feeling that in that room is the thing that I came to get and it's looking at me in North [Applause] and so I leave the room talking to myself I wouldn't know what didn't I go in there I was sitting here and I've shared something get up and go why I don't know your mind plays tricks I believe that there's about 3,000 voices and if one of them decides to trick you it will sell and will tell you get up and go to and it knows you you want it so it tells you to go you get up you go there and just as you step into that room this thought leaves your brain and it hides in your body now where does it hide here yes this is where it hides you know how I know because when I go back and I sit down I said you know I could oh yeah so my suggestion to you is when you're in the room and you can't remember what you came together no no not sit down take your hand like this don't let your children see you're doing this now and press real hard that'll send it up to the brain you'll remember like how you can just it just goes now the one I'm talking about you're sitting so I don't know where this thing hides and and and this one says call so-and-so and usually right pick up the phone and it'll give you the numbers now from here to here that thing runs out of your brain and now you're sitting there listening to a phone rang and you have no idea who you're calling now stupidity also goes hand in hand with this cuz you could hang up if you want to I mean this is not a communist country this is America you can hang up if you don't know who the hell you're calling I'm just gonna be stupid I'm just letting this thing ring and I hope the people Know Who I am now they pick up the phone and I still don't know who this is they just hello so I say hey how you done and they say who is this and I hang up now they call me back I say hello they say did you just call me I said who is this I may hang up on me [Applause] pitiful pitiful you got a Reba --have gotta learn how to live with it I want my wife back because it's wonderful it's wonderful better we've been married 23 years it's lovely I don't know how many of you just got married maybe two years maybe three maybe one year maybe a week but it's wonderful and and don't be afraid to argue I don't want you to make up an argument but just don't be afraid are you know when you're when you're newly married you can you get so you're afraid to argue oh god is this it it's going to be rich now I can't let it out first two years of our marriage I had a ball cuz I look at my wife when I wanted to and I said ray oh no wrong tears run down at Jesus you run upstairs and slammed the bathroom door I sit downstairs row row row row row row I don't know what happened to her in the third year I don't know what happened the Communist gut to her or something but I remember distinctly I looked at her and I said row and she said her things haven't been right since and sometimes marriage living with the person you don't have to have conflict you know you haven't had an argument in 3-4 months and last night was just wonderful and you wake up and you look at your mate and he's the dumbest looking thing you've ever seen in your life and he isn't doing anything either there but he just looks dumb to you and you get angry with yourself for marrying somebody who looks this dumb and he sits up and smiles how are you looking dumb smiling you go downstairs angry with yourself because you got to live for the rest of your life with somebody that's dumb you can't understand it and he comes downstairs smiling and looking dumb and he's got the nerve to say what's the matter with you this morning what is the matter with me why is it that there's always something wrong with me how come it's never anything wrong with you you know you need to see a psychiatrist but my mother and father smooth man don't argue long and some people say what are their old people and they don't want a heart attack no that isn't it that isn't it it's just that I would imagine 50 years after a while you learn what you want to burn your because I hear the two of them talking to each other and they will give up on a great opening and you know that's the fun part of life man your wife leaves an opening like that you drive right on in man turn that thing around and great it touches it oh but my mother and father won't even pick it up I'll give you an example what I'm talking about they came to my house my father took his head off put it in the chair my mother sat in the chair next to him dad went over to the children here it's the money for you and the money for you and the money for you the money for you came back sat down on his hat my mother's looking at him so my mother said you just sat on your head my father said I know it that was it now if if I left an opening like that for my wife first she would have done a half hour of eye rolls and arm waves [Applause] [Applause] it's time for him to leave my father stood up picked up his hat did not fix it put it on top of his head with the lumps and the dips all in it my mother looked up at him took his arm they went out the door my wife would have done another half hour if you think I'm going out of the door with somebody with a head on looking like that you've lost your mind I'm riding in the car with her father's driving my mother sitting on the passenger side my father goes past the turn to mine my mother's sitting up front like this I'm in the back like this I said mom she said yes and she didn't dad go past the turn she said yes I said well why don't you say something to dad my mother said your father knows what he's doing my wife would have done a half-hour on me would you please pull over so I can get a bus or a cab or something I like to ride with somebody who knows where they're going you know this area has already been discovered [Applause] wonderful arguments that I have with my wife I'm able to pay her back now there was a time she was way ahead of me after the third year she would win every argument not that I was wrong but she had this weapon she had developed I'd make a statement and I'd break out the Bible Reader's Digest and an encyclopedia and and and I'd say all three say exactly what I just said and she said and and and that sucking of the teeth oh it just tore me of it and then it just got inside of me there's talk you know and I had no answer for it and then the 15th year I was married the weapon came and now it gets to her just like mr. meek goes inside I've always looked for something to just burn her up there like it's a wonderful weapon and husbands get it but it takes 15 years for form to develop it you know I don't know why we take so long but it's a fantastic weapon my grandfather was the first one to have it I didn't know he had it when I first saw it because I was six years old I was in their home and we were playing a game downstairs and my grandmother was upstairs it was a two-story house and my grandmother said Russell Russell Russell my grandfather's and I looked at him I said granddad he said yeah I said gram dad grandmom just called you he said who as a grand mom she's upstairs and she called you he said when I said just now hmm my grandmother came to the top of the stairs she still couldn't see him cuz we were in the back part of the living room she said Russell will you come up here please I said grandad he said yeah I said she did it again he said home I said grandmom just called he said when I oh no and my grandmother came downstairs veins were popping all over her neck and there was a vein going down the center of her forehead that thing was standing out about a foot she said you heard me called you you know and the halo came over my grandfather's head he said if I had heard you my darling my love I would have come my god and I didn't know it was the weapon next time I saw it I was 15 my father had it then my mother called my father we were sitting in the living room and I know my father was away cuz I just finished saying something to him and my mother called him and he just sat there silence was in the living room and she caught up again and I said daddy said yeah that's wrong this disease is running through this family I said mom called me he said I never my mother came in she heard you got out when I called he said I didn't hear you damn you I have the weapon now love it love it nothing gets to him worse than that and they come in the room my wife called me man I don't hear anything and they come she come and I loving that I didn't hear a thing and I know it's tearing her out it kills them because they know you heard him they can't prove it wonderful good life yes my parents were lower lower economic people sometimes on what we called relief which is spelled welfare 15th and the thirtieth of each month the mailman was our best friend and my mother saved to me and my father said to me we want you to do we want you to do they said that to me and I said yes and I didn't because I was having fun just having fun because I had a feeling that no matter what who needed it it was going to be alright anyway and it was following and every once in a while it was alright and I didn't need much man is need get some sneakers put tape around them if they start wearing I'm still playing ball I still have friends we're still having a good time didn't drink didn't smoke one party no drugs just having fun man just out there and the teacher said alright read this and do that and I take the books home I took him home I took him home and I put him down and I went out and played and I was going to read the things but then it was time for dinner people said eat dinner so I ate the dinner and then it was time for the radio program I listened to the radio and then it's time to know it's time to go to sleep and so I quit high school at age 19 [Applause] another two years I would have graduated and I was out I was out I was happening my mother wasn't happy my father wasn't happy but I was happy and I was downtown looking for a job I was scalping places that I wanted to work in they joined the Navy and I looked so I signed up came home I told my mother joined the Navy she cried oh baby about say good move suppose the report down to the bus station I did I had no girlfriend I wasn't unhappy everything is alright I'm ready to go away this is a new life new experience bus ride going to Maryland Bainbridge so boys kissing the girlfriends girls crying guys got on the bus they cried on down the bus got to the place reported a little bag toothbrushing thing I saw man came over this company 217 I'm gonna be in charge of it then he started to talk about our mothers and he started talking about my mother it wasn't personal it was just a broad mother thing that mother my mother had babied me and I was not a man and that he was going to make a man out of me in six weeks something my mother hadn't done in 19 years and if he didn't make a man of me I was going to the Brig which is Jail I had no idea that I was going to be penalized like that and he went up and he talked in your face like this and you couldn't do anything could you go to jail you don't know what happened in the braid they might shoot you we marched to the barracks try to keep your head up and there was this wide-open spaces nothing wood floors and TV bunks little thing mattress following people parts are serving bourbon Cosby Harvick having this with my place in blue and in lockers about this big and put all of everything I hold into this thing like this yeah all right now to fold your clothes your phone if you don't fold it goes right nothing's going in every will I have an inspection every day and touch any curse you may be happy for your colors [ __ ] again not in the tow yard right give me a ticket I'm gonna fight for my country I don't beat this man up first [Applause] nice 2,200 I'll be back here at 0 400 and I want every living Slovak alcohol every bounder on the deck floor I got you on that other element I want to put it on a credit card didn't even say good night Oh God so everybody after you left me and everybody started lightening up cigarettes and boy that guy shopping yeah I'm gonna write my alderman about that guy get rid of him right away I don't know it started to fall asleep around one o'clock zero 100 woke up this man woke us up zero 400 just as I was going into the second phase of that I mean were you really going you don't hear anything and this man came through turn the lights on it's the first time I ever heard light and I didn't know where I was and I didn't know and the first thing out of my mouth I said mom I'm not and he had a stick and he put it in the trash can in this metal cab and started banging your socks and grab your socks and grab your socks and and I pulled the covers over me and I wanted to yell back and you are rude pull the covers over me shoot and I heard him walking his footsteps and he came to the buck that was the first bucket mine was a second and the kid in there still sleeping and man he took his foot he had a boot on and kick the bump and the kid took the stick and he jams that up wanted a second pow he didn't hit the kid he just crapped on top of the other one it came round and I was dressed I'm standing there had my pants on backwards and jersey inside out and shoot left you on the right foot right you wanted both shoes on the same foot the man looked at me and said you know I like you if you try I said thank you sir he said don't talk to me unless you brush your teeth and he went down that row and he started grabbing people and pulling covers and yanking and grabbing and throwing I told you to drop you over there and I stood there man and I wanted to say things I wanted to say now why do we have to but I knew that man would put me in jail he put all of us in jail you talk back to him this guy and he kept a cigarette in his mouth cigarette was just hanging down like this in the ash was about this long ash never fell off the cigarette and smoke went up this nostril and then he breathed it out through the other one then the Hat was cocked over this one eye and he just look at me told you who your mother was and who your mother didn't do your mother didn't do anything for you and get so mad you wanted to punch him but you knew then they would shoot you if you punch this left and I'm calling my alderman I don't care what's happen I'll call and get my committeemen to get this man fired from this job he doesn't know my father has Paul's fallout and everybody went outside and we stood outside his pitch black pitch black outside it and I'm hurting I want to cry because I go to sleep it's close I don't know where I am and this man as much it not be done it is 4:30 in the morning once to fight it 4:30 in the morning nobody you can't see anybody gonna shoot somebody you can sail this is stupid right face and I was in the Boy Scouts so I knew how to March and I made a right face in the kid was looking in so I said to the kid you're facing the wrong way and the man can't leave it and give the kid a chance went over and kicked him in the shed I've got to now you remember that praying that's your right side now can I write a stop crying I'm not telling my life for it back and we started much now I was in the Boy Scouts I was in the holly freaks marching band and I know when you march it left right left right left right left right left right did you did you did you did you did you did you do did you did you do so I know that but this man had some stuff we were marching paired up talk to the press hot dog they did a hard hit hard there are 10 lakh today pero hopefully turn night appalled and I didn't know what the hell to do it I didn't know what unlocked it humped wouldn't let not head tipped and so we're gonna hit ball along to hip hit block pit and one guy is stepping on my shoe and you wanted anything now my heel is out of the shoe and I'm trying to one hit off pause to pray as why you know not turn I mean don't do it hey kept down title like that I call you about a cono 2025 hump little all too long pause to pray the man came up what kind of don't try to be soulful around here that's martyred I said but no job but everybody turn phone who do you think our target out for their think you'll think I'm gonna air alright talk to you you'll get your face cold heart hey everybody he went crazy I know what I tell you tomorrow everybody boys don't cry why don't they giving me what happening everything what is this it's gonna fight against enemy people say the crying when the enemy comes or kidding is that what you're gonna do hello everybody went crazy - I just came in here because I got a girl pregnant [Applause] forward for those of you might hate it all panicked kidding here the whole injury and it's still pitch black out there and I don't understand what any of this is about I can't talk back to anybody I can't ask any questions just doing all this I can't March and it dawned on me then I I I wanted to to then ask if I could see the company commander I wanted to see the company commander yes I've only been there less than a day but I can talk to the company commander and I want to tell the company commander sir I want to thank the Navy for for what it has done for me I I now know what I want to do in this life no no sir I want to go to college I really want to go to college now I know I haven't graduated from high school but I from the way I feel I can go to college and high school at the same time and if I fall below a B and please you could take me right back in this Navy but I am going to study I tell you and as a matter of fact I know two fellows who should be in the Navy right now so if I bring you two of them then you let me out I'm going to college in high school at the same time because I want to thank the name before what it has done for me so that's what we're talking about when we're talking about motivation parents don't get enough credit for what they've gone through George Washington George's father did not know that this kid who cut down the cherry tree was the George Washington oh they tell you in the school George was you didn't cut down his father's cherry tree and his father came home his father George why did you cut the cherry tree down and George said father I cannot tell a lie for it was I and that's all I knew as was it because you're so honest I won't punish you and that's all the mention you have of George Washington's father you don't even know George Washington's father's real name except his name was George Washington's father no credit given whatsoever to the man who let this boy live now you know you come home and there's your kid and he's cut down a tree and you've got a safe good tree down and he says I cannot tell a lie for it was I of course you can tell a lie you're the only child nobody else here to cut a tree down and his father had to go to work you know my dumb kid didn't and I come over there's a tree laid out he doesn't know why didn't she take him to a psychologist psychologist well he's interested in forestry [Applause] George Washington's father did not know he was going to become the George Washington yet there is no George Washington's father's International Airport we let that boy live not knowing what he was going to become and even when your children become middle-aged or whatever you don't know what they're going to do Benjamin Franklin's parents in the house looking out the window there's their son standing on a hillside at the middle of an electrical storm flying a kite with a big iron ring on the end of the string asking for a bolt of lightning to hit him the neighbors loved it come in look at the Franklin boy come there and the lightning hit in the middle of his hair fell out and he went home and his clothes his food is it you know I found it they didn't know he was the Benjamin Franklin yet there is no mr. and mrs. Benjamin Franklin mall and they let that boy live I was 11 years old and the project's August 174 degrees Fahrenheit playing basketball that's how it shooting badly jumping and my mother came out said do you know how hard it is I get in my mother wouldn't you be you get in this house right now you know you can get a stroke in the heat stroke get in the house and I said what man she said you do it and I win and I was so mad I sat down hard on the sofa couldn't even breathe good my father came by said dad mom my father said you do what your mother says then I stood up look him in both eyes and I said I hate both of you and I'm running away from home and my father lifted me up over his head and said how far do you want to go he didn't know I was the Bill Cosby thank you good night good night thank you [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music]

Channel: Reelblack One

Views: 654,414

Keywords:

Id: 1_chNSFp22M

Length: 69min 48sec (4188 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 21 2019