Best of Detective Carter

what the hell i supposed to do with him take him to the zoo i'm detective carter do you speak her any english do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth i cannot believe this [ __ ] first i get a [ __ ] assignment that mystery right cerrone put joe back in the back no no no no no you put your own [ __ ] in the back i'm not a sky cat did i tell you to wait for me huh what the hell you doing on this bus you think i'm playing with you i think i'm playing with you i ain't playing with you sit there 50 million dollars and don't you think you kidnapped chelsea clinton you want to eat fires with that y'all y'all y'all you sound like a karate movie y'all yo yo yo what isn't good [Music] oh [Music] do it again [Music] damn chin some greasy [ __ ] ain't got no better food like some chicken wings some baby back ribs some fries or something chinese food no sofa here i didn't say anything about no soul food i said you got some better food i don't want that greasy [ __ ] how you gonna sell a big box of grease i'm no punk [ __ ] i i've been looking for your sweet and sour chicken ass wipe yourself off man you did you know he did i mean what the hell you doing i just being polite well next time people liked my nuts i'm sorry why don't y'all take that badge and shove it up your ass all up in your ass 15 hours what we gonna do for 15 hours whoa oh hell no [Music] i'm late yeah you're late you're late man i've been waiting in the back of the diner for you over an hour man i was in the diner man i told you the back of the day you thought i was gonna do this [ __ ] up front man you crazy i'm gonna get busted you i was in the diner you weren't in the dining head in the back of the it don't even matter man i'm late you laid it don't matter man let's come on let's do this what's that a gun put that gun away man how many people you don't kill this year stop it man come on let's do it come on come on come on man don't be late again i ain't gonna be late come on [Music] 45 you better tell me something i don't know oh hi nade joy team of mob oh our tang okay find out right now i got somebody's old chopstick stuck up my ass lee why didn't you tell me this man rolls like this i told you i already didn't i did what you said i did this what do this mean man speak english to me that means i go this way and you go this way i'll go that way you go this way yes okay one to you man when the last time you played hide the rainbow row huh let's hear it lee the year the wreck i will slap you if you don't move this car hey china i'ma slap you fish you know i'm gonna slap you who darling you detective you not you you oh you oh do you understand the words that are coming out from my mouth don't nobody understand the words that are coming out of your mouth man oh screaming like you sound like that all the time when godzilla's coming y'all be tripping i've seen the movie maybe lord hammers what cut off our egg rolls hell no bite that thing bite it bite it like a little monkey go bite it hey girl yank it use them tackle teeth grab it pull on it you almost got it that's it what the hell what's this 500 chip sir you gave me 500 chips cause i'm black uh no sir i did not i just assumed you assumed that a brother coming in here could only afford 500 a row is that it uh no i didn't think that at all sir are you racist no i'm not how come everybody else around the table got thousand dollar chips and the black man got a nickel i don't know what the hell did that happen it just happened it just happened in it sorry oh this is crazy you think my people suffer 362 years of slavery so you can send us back to the cotton fields with 500 out of chips no do i look like chicken george to you what the hell is that i have no idea huh i think it should calm down i think you should go over there and count something give me my chips and i want a thousand dollar chips hurry up i just want to be treated badly is that too much damage is that too much ass why the hell you didn't tell me you had a bomb in your mouth i did no you didn't i said what the hell is boom the god damn what happened to rain hell no he don't win too far now lee shoot his ass right now lee shoot his ass what are you doing all you got to do is pull that trigger back and bam don't let him talk about your daddy like that show them lee yes hell you can lee ain't nobody up here but us man go up and he's trying to punch you kill him if you ain't gonna shoot him come fool his ass or something hey what's wrong with you you don't jump in front of a black man in the buffet line calm down sorry lee you can't be black that's a hype requirement same as riding a metal horn okay i'm about to slice you up like a giant california roll we'll be asking the questions old man who are you you no not me you yes i am you just answer the damn questions who are you i have told you are you deaf no you is blind i'm not blind you blind they're just what i just said you just said what i did not say what i said you that's what i'm asking you and you is understood shut up you yes not you him what's your name me yes you i am me he's me and i'm you and i'm about to whoop your old ass man cause i'm sick of playing games you me everybody's ass around here him i'm gonna kick his ass i'm chickening i don't know what the hell you feeding him but he is too damn big don't move i'll blow your ass cheeks off that's it i always cut your back why the hell you give me an empty gun then i didn't know tell us right now i'll cut your bees off and shove them in your mouth his beads his beads just his hair is stinking beads i'm trying to kill somebody man damn you want violent smelly frenchman huh do you want violence well you got it oh see can you see oh seeking [Music] come on crouching tiger don't hide that dragon ass up you are a super freak [Music] i'm a bad girl hallelujah holy mother of jesus she's a man i went to second base with a damn frenchman it's the crying games i'm broke back carter oh i'm not a man he's just a wigger you sure about that huh lee go over there and check the hardware if she got anything in her bag bigger than a three-iron we gonna beat his ass lee might be your brother but turn me to your sister everybody watch kung fu fighting that man was fast as amen you touch me again you're gonna owe me dinner in a movie you need a person a trainer it's like it says 180 pounds you're way more than a damn car girl i have a thyroid condition well stop eating thyroids look who messed up in some weird [ __ ] lady i mean man whatever the hell you are

Channel: DavidTorto

Views: 615,853

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Id: dQ1hAD4oofI

Length: 8min 47sec (527 seconds)

Published: Mon Apr 04 2022