Beautifully Broken | Kimberly Jones Pothier | Joni Table Talk | Joni Lamb

welcome brokenness lead to healing and can there be beauty from ashes today we'll introduce you to a woman who lived for years in a prison of fear and insecurity but it was in her brokenness that she found a love that would completely change her life but before we talked about that amazing testimony joining me around the table is my daughter Rachel lamb Brown how are you I'm good we like testimonies don't we we do and I'm so excited about our guests today so many of my friends really enjoy her and she's got a really big impact yeah and they're all especially through social media that's awesome and Rebecca lamb wife how are you right I'm always great honestly why are testimonies so powerful actually when I heard this was the testimony show I was like yes I'm so excited because those are my favorite because every one has a story and people can relate to other people's stories yeah argue if somebody's story you even argue all day long you can surely can't argue someone's experience yeah argue it's what Simon said that's right that's right Cindy Murdock how are you I'm doing great and so excited about this show it's gonna have so much drama in life well for Kimberley life started out promising she was born into a loving family but even at a young age labels placed on her by others and even herself would lead to a life of heartache loneliness and dysfunction but she would ultimately learn the value of being beautifully broken now we call you Real Talk Kim and Rachel you wanted to know why do we play that well I went on Twitter and it was when I first started like 2014 and I went on Twitter and had nothing else to do and so I was on Twitter and I put my name in and my name was used and so Twitter said we have a great recommendation for you Real Talk kills so Twitter named me oh my god literally Twitter it god is intentional he knew that I was one gonna go preach and you keep it real I thought that's why they do me that I thought it started cuz of the brokedown car on the side of the road weld I had a lot to do with it too that's how that's how God put me out there cuz God will literally qualify you you don't even need people could be like who is she where does she come from God man when he trusts you and he says girl you're gonna keep it playing you're gonna tell your story real you're gonna talk about how you drove that dude to drink and how you couldn't keep man and man it's just like I can say things to the world and they're just like I did on the cross for you to be a side chick they're like I love it I love it well let's go back to the beginning if we could because you were you were raised in a pastor's home you were PK and but it was a very strict if you were illegal is a denomination that you were raised in so do you remember like his little girl like being in church all the time yeah yeah I even remember like there's a reason why I was the way I ended okay I was the preacher's kid that my dad would be like brother winters you can go whip her right now because she's not like I'll ever be in the church like like was my father and mother yes I would just mean just mean from the get-go and so growing up of course you begin to sing in church yeah and if you will perform in church yeah but there wasn't any real connection between you and God at that point what was going on where you just play remember how I was liking awaking at 7 and I remember one day I was sitting I was hauling in church always in church I mean I was like like under the seats picking peoples poses you know hold my feet down so they can shout and I just one day at 7 like the seven years old clearly sitting on the front row and and looking up there as those people were staying in one glare morning when this life is over wait I'm thinking yeah really think of what it could happen with all y'all like this is what happens to look like y'all look miserable I don't believe nothing you're saying yeah I remember that very moment like a shift because the enemy he starts young like when he knows that you're gonna be a force he knew doesn't get Mike together about 38 years old I've got four shift yeah and I was gonna become honey wood I'm just what God's called me to be so he's trying to take me out of young age as I remember he just made me I just tainted religion just man I mean everybody's miserable that were hypocrites I didn't I don't like church I didn't so I ran and got married to a teen trying to get away from religion oh so you just wanted to get away from it all yeah and from the age of seven you kind of made a determination like this isn't what I want this is nothing I want to be a part of no and I remember I mean I like remember the shift when it happened and from that point on it was like I was just disconnected and I was disconnected from religion I was disconnected from God I just was running I wouldn't married this dude I didn't think this marriage counted and I was like what God said you need to put in your book I'm like but not my book cuz I passed this dude on the street right now I don't even know what it looks like because it was like that fast yeah and I just was running and running that would just set me up all the way through I was at rock Parsley's Church saying him on his praise team and we were coming home from Israel and Lester Sumrall and rod parsley and mama parsley mama parsley scared me to death and we were coming home and they she was the preacher oh my god she was a preacher and she said that they said when we get home we're gonna we're gonna to sit down and talk to you because we can we can see you looking at that boy I'd only been divorced you are not gonna light that piano boy you are not allowed to date him you are do you have a call in your life and you're gonna jump out of the farm to the front band and I remember uh as soon as I got home midnight I get my load you go I'm like bye Felicia I left and married him and probably stayed married to him a lot longer 17 years than I should have trying to prove right partially wrong so you seems like you were like I'm gonna do what I'm gonna do no tell me what to do cuz you were raised in an environment we're like do this do this do this and you're like no I'm in my own when they couldn't preach and I remember my mom and dad tell a story it's in that book about how I would just put on my little Barbie dolls up like I don't understand how men look like that a GQ you know I'm a little like there were hobbits like I don't understand my god is so bad like we it's Eve's fault I hate it Eve Eve the only time in history a woman's ever know what she wanted to eat what's in the garden I mean that broad we just dated her lay so I just remember like like put my little Gaza I'm like I guess since I can't preach I'll have to be praise and worship who would ever thought after all my rebellious years see people were sleeping on me no and I hope you're ready for it today because it's gonna bless you for sure I love your authenticity and I love your realness your transparency because your story tells people who are watching today that even if they've made mistakes that God's not through with them and so tell us about that the marriage ending and now you had two beautiful little boys but is that when your world crashed I remember I would I was always like I just so and just just just like codependent on the deprivation pain of this marriage it was so toxic to preachers kids alcoholism sin will take you further than you want to go and cost you everything I thought that we were only out of church like three years I lied to myself and I remember we had to move back into my mom and daddy me and my boys I said about a while helping us in ministry there right cuz we hate your church I'm like what I thought I've had you in church your whole life they're like no you didn't we never went to church till we came here and I remember God was like man you lied to yourself for all those years and I found myself one night it got an abusive and it was like when when he would drink it would get abusive and and I was that girl that said if anybody ever lays a hand on me I want to take a front can I beat the tar go when you get in a situation like that and and the enemy starts breaking her self-esteem down and telling you that it's your fault that they're drinking and your big mouth drove him to drink cuz I'm good as always God was I I could hold my own okay and I found myself in a bush one night with no shoes no phone and I remember God speaking to me and I'd never heard God speak to me and I heard just a still small voice cuz I was desperate at that moment $500,000 house I was a designer told people I could decorate and they believed me and I was banking and I remember sitting in that Bush that night and I said I got a call of God on your life and he ran and he ran and he ran and one ounce of obedience would be more for you than all the prayer in the world right now you've got a surrender you got to go back to your mom and dad's the place you've ran away from at 18 and you got to start full circle 20 years later okay so you got out of that abusive relationship and you took your two boys yeah and you went back home yeah what was that like the first girl way because we were kind of like the bar being can of ministry here I mean you know it was like we were we were we were some mega churches mm-hmm doing praise and worship and nobody knew what we were living in because you can't tell people you know when you're when you're in ministry you can't really be real that's why I'm so real now yeah cuz I'm just saying somebody who's got to be real so that people aren't lying and going to their graves miserable because they just couldn't get healed because they faked it put masks on and man I went back to my mom and daddys lost everything lost my car's lost my house I had to be extremely humble you people talking about me yeah I wanted to defend myself so bad and I heard God say you lift so nobody believes it and I vindicate you don't you worry about people don't meet you clap back uh-huh get your tail and hide out and I need you to I need to do not disturb up on your heart and I need you to get to know who you are and I need you to look at yourself in that mirror and I need you to talk to yourself because how could be someone's escape and not their duty like I didn't want to drive another man off with my big mouth I didn't want to be so broken that if a man knew I needed just was eating me up and man I went on a journey with God I tell you what it got real I think I'm gonna give you your God yeah tell us about the journey because that's really important oh you had never really been intimate with God after all those years of ministry Carl even had enough fallout I just even had my grace you know people in charge do that okay well no you said you didn't like gospel music and you had you'd listen to bands at your little or so my mom and mama would come in and start blaring like Gaither band or something I was the devil was after me I was just so thankful that they did do that I forgot about that yeah so tell us about for people who are watching that say I want to have an intimate relationship with God I know about him I know he died on the cross I've been to church my whole life but I really don't have that intimacy you're talking about well you know it took me doing it I think what we think in life in society you know everything's quick fix like you know we just we just you know doctor says that we have high blood pressure we want to go get on out of pegs you know they just I put a girdle on just yeah we don't want to get and deal with the inside and I remember laying in my bed one night and I said God here we go like you ain't fixing it cuz he told me I'm not good I can't take your pain away this is where the body of Christ is we think God's a genie in a bottle yes and he said I can't take your pain away you got to get up and walk away from it you got to stop stalking it you got to stop going out there breaking your own heart over and over again and man I laid in that bed I'm never it was the shift I laid in that bed I was like okay God here we go and you got eight hours you got eight hours cuz yo I was laying in bed every night kill him kill him with it specific yeah how ordered that do dad and I want him dead with the Train cuz I knew Benny here couldn't bring him back from the dead my guy said girl your heart is Nastya and I remember laying there y'all laying there having to go back like kindergarten in my prayer like God I want to forgive but I don't know I want to forgive and I think this is where we get in life and in church we just do we just get immune and we print stuff down and we don't talk about it cuz we're what if they know about our past don't talk about it cuz there's somebody out there waiting on your transformation I member laying in that bed it's okay card you got eight hours cuz Lincoln and Morgan are gonna need some oatmeal they're about eight hours and I'm gonna need you to have healed me and I remember that night I made up my mind this is it I'm getting up ain't looking back I'm not gonna stay stuck because you ain't stuck unless you want to be and that's what I learned that night you are not stuck people say I will go preach around the world preach this come out sermon and then I'd be like how many people first up the whole church stands in heaven it's mentality yeah and it's also being empowered to make your own choice his God's made us Victor's not victims be you it's like he's given this victory but we have to choose to walk in it yeah and the devil wants us to get into self-pity it's demonic comes going this downward spiral and it's never gonna be better when Jesus already has one but we have to choose to walk in it and the other thing that's really interesting is that you were raised in a church you were raised in home always talking about God but yet you never got to experience intimacy with Jesus and that's what Christianity is all about and when you had to see God for who he really was you fell in love with him who's like like literally what I learned in that season was when you hit rock bottom you found out who the rock is at the bottom which you can't take it to the phone no more you gotta take it to the throne because God will put you in that separate season and he'll say I'm terrible darkness come on that wilderness my pit and then you get this oil dripping off of you did you come out and you already free from people cuz they talk at them they talk about just you got thanks and please yeah what did your parents think when you came home and about your journey I mean because they probably saw someone yeah this way and then to Mouse to you this way can't imagine how proud they are you know what it's almost surreal it really is because I'm doing things that nobody my family's ever done and I wasn't handed a woman there at lose platform or you don't have a father that did know but he wrote books you know I didn't know how to run a book I didn't know how to you know I had to start all over again and so they look at me today I mean I'm passionate of their church they gave me two years ago and preaching all around the world writing three books that was a special ed my whole life you ever thought I was gonna write books and man just sign with charisma that's awesome okay so eight hours God you've got to do something did you go to sleep no girl I did not stay right there and I felt because I had an experience with God that night okay so tell I literally I remember I remember laying there it was almost like I had a bodily experience cuz I felt something like it was almost y'all like not now in my meetings when I see people you know you just have this touch like oh my god I've never had this and it kind of takes your breath away and I'm like that's God it's like the power of the Holy Spirit yeah and I felt it for the first time in that room and I didn't leave and I came out looking different I don't know what happened but God came in there and took all the anger out of me the bitterness out of me I didn't hate people anymore like it happened in the eight hours but it was because I said I ain't leave it when you put a demand on the Holy Spirit say I'm ready to help god help me and then what happened was like I walked out went to work that day and man dozen trees were green and it wasn't gray and blue it was all of a sudden I just the joy that I just felt the breaking yeah and didn't you would your job that you ended up doing wasn't that where you had to really be a one on one with people and you were struggling to like gosh I didn't like people I remember the first person that ever set my chair they maybe guy gave me a you were doing makeup right because you had the water you had to go back to back to work nine dollars an hour yeah and I mean I left a big old house and now I'm not just by yeah and and I had to go work for Estee Lauder which I hate their purview they make you wear navy blue polyester suits and I look horrible navy blue so it was like everything that I did tested that God was like I just could see him I'd never say I got a plan but I knew he was laughing at me like girl we were pretty although because I was a girl I was cocky I was a brat I was selfish and he put me right there one on one and I remember that first lady her name was everyone and she sat in my chair I was scared to death cuz I don't know how to do makeup but literally I used to wear glasses cuz my eyebrows are not on fleek y'all just have a great makeup lady here but when I tell you I said there looked at that woman and I thought oh my gosh like I'm gonna need this job and I started doing that lady's makeup as a girl you are so beautiful man what God created you he created you cuz he was bored and gave you everything perfect you don't even need a lot of make that girl bought the lip gloss and came back the next Friday eyes ever line it was new nude works on everybody also she said I have a proposition for you she said I've been going to a counseling for the last ten years because my husband of 28 years walked out with my best friend and I've been going to counseling and still stuck and you did something yeah last week in that chair I walked out I opened my blinds I felt like I could run through a troop leap over a wall I don't know what you did but every Friday I'm gonna come sit in your chair and I'll buy another lip gloss every week and what was happening was God was showing me that for so often we get caught up in our own struggle that we don't even like we're so caught here that when we start helping somebody else you see somebody's waiting for your transformation something I would have never walked through that divorce I would have never had to go sit and do makeup on and I've been still over there laying in the country club with my little Mercedes and my $500,000 house and my Gucci bags and that divorce took me to set it set me up for God was taking me the trajectory shift he said if I can get you to love one person because I didn't like people if I can get you to love one person then I'll move you to the counter manager position you'll be over six people and if you do that and y'all I got fired from that store it was it was Belk and I got fired from that store for timeclock fraud with a whole lot of age okay remember they said I thought oh I'm getting me I'm getting me a right now a promotion up in here and I walked back you don't have to walk out with security they said you're getting fired I was like what they said you stay clocked in all night long I was like what did you think I was doing sleeping in the back of the store let me tell you look I did everything strategic with god yeah get out of his way and you didn't mean to get it I mean I won't that was security like humbling and I walked got home and the estee lauder executive called me her name was Brandi and she said I just caught me who's Connie she never called me I'm calling to check on you and she goes well good because we have a job for you at Bloomingdale's and we couldn't intersect stores so unless you quit or hello you got fired now we can start your new job tomorrow sometimes gotta shut that door cuz he knows I would never moved cuz my kids needed yeah romain noodles yeah wow that's always stayed right there and then I went work for Bloomingdale's and in that run of the whole cosmetic Department and I left there five years ago Oh five years ago well tell us about this guy that the lawyer got in your life no but of course now you did eventually leave Bloomingdale's and go into ministry okay so listen this listen this Joni so I was driving a hoopty that's a brokedown car for all you mature people that don't know and it was a 300 I swear it was a 300 Chrysler a little completely on the outside but it was broke down on the inside and it had me sitting on the side of the road almost every day going down 75 because it's one hour home when I record on our coming and one day I was sitting on the side of the road I'm getting so free like I literally would be walking through the store just touching people because I was like I mean I was just so free like God and radically changed my life and I remember one day that there's smoke started coming up and I'm sitting on 75 like always that all I could think about was Broadway God you think of everything you've given me my own smoke machine [Laughter] hello some people are you sitting on the side of the road in your hooptie feeling like God's forgotten about you oh you want to give up you upload that video went viral Wow Bloomingdale's y'all oh my god sees you're ready it went viral I mean like overnight I thought said you hey chef there's my old smoke machine I'm like dude every time you got me something side the road no off he's just gonna do a video that is a man they went viral and I got to lead Bloomingdale's and start preaching and God began to open doors so at some point this man came into your life when you were ready yeah but that was important don't you think girls that God heal and prepare her before you bring this man absolutely I think she said she's getting to experience marriage so it was supposed to be I think two other times who you were in really broken relationship and now you're thriving and you're with someone who celebrates from behind yeah and two hats don't make a hole when it comes really people need to be whole people and you attract what you are and I always attracted broken men yes so I was finally healed and this young man was not what I was looking for all right willing for nobody else so free and getting a travel and that's another time when you're ready when you're Julien yeah and I mean I'm sober you're thinking I told God literally when he put me in timeout to get Mart ready I don't know give you here and then I'm gonna eat harmony and I'm gonna help you out I didn't I got so free lost to my purpose I would've been thinking about that's so good that's dude I met on Facebook like ladies singles out there you can't do did you meet your soul face yeah it's really perfect guys you can go look at their page like I went to this page all of a sounds like I'd be like this and then I just kept looking at what his friends were saying his heart love people like my heart love people and he was a dude and love people like that and he just all of a sudden he asked me if he could call me and I knew it would be the one if I let a man called hate the phone like me - yeah what'd you have for lunch whoa yeah I just hate it like I put needles in my eyeballs and I let him call me and then all of a sudden I start on my finger like he prayed for me and that was like if they don't pray baking's day he needed to braid the braid I remember the fourth night he said we talked about ours that's another good sign man I did - and he lived in San Diego my guy was longest come time so you know what it made you get to know your heart and I fell in love with that man before I ever met him we'll see and his parents were on the show with us and so they stock your page they were on the show with us and they had mentioned to Susie my daughter in love about they had a son so then she probably wouldn't have accepted accepted his friendship on Facebook he said Susie and said hey there's she had said something to me but he contacted me on his own yeah he like he determined it himself and we started and it was the same thing because when you're talking on the phone you don't have that physical interaction so really see someone's lit hard and really see there's a genuine connection she went throughout - its raw in the consistence right yes calling every day twice a day for me and your is they're faking it they're gonna is gonna expose that's gonna fall off at some point so what happened was his his mom and dad said watch the show we were on and when he watched it she was on the show and so that's what he went a-looking on Facebook on his own and the thing that's interesting too is that kind of like you were your and your purpose that's how I was I was just being obedient and when you're just focused on God you're obeying him he'll bring you you don't even have to work for it yeah yeah yeah yeah that's so amazing that's love you got married ten months yeah marry due 10/9 like he moved he was 50 years old have been in San Diego his whole life now y'all look at him he is the sexiest sorry thought a man never left San Diego has to be loved San Francisco I mean great cities right and that's wonderful that's wonderful the book is beautifully broken and you can see we love talking with Kim she's such a blessing we are out of time I want to thank her for sharing her story with us be sure to pick up a copy of a book beautifully broken it's available now and for more on her ministry you can visit online at real talk kim.com well if you're watching today maybe you've battled with labels that you or someone else put on you I want you to know that just like he said Kim free he wants to set you free today there's a toll-free number on the screen we have amazing prayer partners standing by ready to pray with you you can call from literally all over the world we want to pray for you today you can also go to day Starcom and click on prayer send us your prayer requests there's something about that power of agreement and I say what I just believe that some of you and your heart has been stirred and you're like well you know what maybe maybe God's not through with me I believe that is a word for you today well don't forget to join the conversation online after the program by leaving us a comment on Facebook or Twitter we want to hear what God is doing in your life through Table Talk we love to hear your stories miss Kim thank you so much honor I love your energy I love your joy I love your exuberance for the things of God and we just pray blessings upon you you reach people that maybe no one else could reach I believe that's gonna happen well thank you so much for watching thank you ladies we'll see you next time bye-bye for today [Music] this has been a day star television production you

Channel: The Way Of Life Church

Views: 18,607

Rating: 4.8110237 out of 5

Keywords: the way of life church, groeschel, lifechurch, life.churchtv, church, god's word, sermon, Christian, bible, God, Beautifully Broken, Kimberly Jones Pothier, Broken, Beautifully, Joni Table Talk, Joni Lamb

Id: 7rQ3cC1dqKQ

Length: 27min 55sec (1675 seconds)

Published: Fri Dec 07 2018