Ayahuasca | FULL DOCUMENTARY from Aubrey Marcus & Mitch Schultz

you [Music] [Music] uh [Music] [Applause] [Music] me ayahuasca is first and foremost a specific plant pretty much universally in the amazon ayahuasca has been regarded as the mother of all plants and it has the qualities communicating with and potentiating the energy and particularly the healing qualities of other plants creates an opening for other medicines to be more effective vine serves as a inhibitor of a digestive enzyme allowing the dmt and the companion plant to be taken up through the stomach through oral administration companion plant is an agent of consciousness and it is an agent that facilitates spiritual healing ayahuasca happens also to be the name [Music] as i like to say there's more to ayahuasca than what's in the cup and you generally couldn't ingest all of what there is to the medicine in in a cup and a lot of it's interactive a lot of it is synergistic a lot of it has to do with being at a point in your life where you're ready to uh make a change [Music] and coming to ayahuasca is based on a personal calling to it that's the way it's always been through the course of human history in relation to these plants there's always been a mystical calling associated with it [Music] ayahuasca it's in a class of medicine experiences that are conscious visionary and open up our heightened senses of awareness all of these things together help us get more clear about our passion our purpose our mission and as a result to be able to release the the craziness in our own human drama and experience more peace throughout our lives the idea of a plant having a consciousness that you can communicate with to the western intellectual mind is just yeah they can't even touch that so a big part of the work that i'm dedicated to doing on a on a consciousness level is to open people to greater possibilities than their mind can presently conceive of once opened it just becomes an ever you know an exponentially expanding process that i think there's no end to [Music] the sacred plants have a way of going directly to the cause it's not that the symptoms are ignored but the primary treatment is not focused on symptoms it's focused on the actual cause of the condition [Music] the only thing we we think is like oh that's who i am you know there's no conscious thought of like all right let's look back and see how you know the death of my brother or my drug abuse or parents divorced at an early age how those things imprinted a certain emotional response and also how they continue to play out in life i was going through a rough time in in my life as a journalist i'd witnessed way too much violence death corruption and i just lost all hope i thought that i was stronger than i was uh i think many of us you know i put on this mask that i can handle this and i i was seeing all of this negativity over and over and over and eventually uh it got to me [Music] i wasn't living i i just was being sucked down into this negative vortex of ptsd so it has this mood elevating effect it's also a natural antidepressant that's why it's one of the most effective treatments for depression and depression is largely one of the major epidemics worldwide right so there's a lot of desire for people to get out of their psychic [Music] stuckness and i was sitting on the plane and looking over the amazon it in all of its beauty seeing you know ribbons of rivers cutting through the greenery and it was like the force was telling me i can cure you have faith [Music] [Applause] one of the first things i was taught about ayahuasca about my first maestro was stated in very simple terms she said little brother i was going to take out everything bad in me and leave all the good [Music] i keep getting asked you're going down to do medicine work again to me this is just like working out the body you know if someone goes to yoga for a week and then they go the next week you know it's not like dude two weeks of yoga in a row like are you crazy this to me is the same thing but for your mind and for me you know i'm in the middle of breaking down a lot of different barriers and walls and things inside myself and you know through further sessions and then the integration i have immense confidence that i'll be able to build all that back up even stronger but there's a point where you're over training so you know there is a place and a time for stopping pumping the brakes but you just got to tune in and make sure that you're allowing yourself enough time to integrate [Music] going into tonight's ceremony i can sense a potency brewing here that i wasn't really anticipating when i came but i'm excited for it you know i'm looking forward to whatever comes and whatever that'll be you know i've learned enough throughout this process to just have faith [Music] i mean i don't think i'm a bad person i just think something's broken inside of me and i just want to fix that maybe i don't love myself as much as i should you know i i think back to when i was young maybe like a 10 year old 12 year old and i recall being very happy as time went on i didn't feel like i knew where i wanted to go in life and i didn't really know how to solve that problem and i just realized i would put myself in harm's way a lot because i was so unhappy with my choices in life i'm in a place now where i don't know how to get out of this i still realize that i didn't have that youthful happiness and after hearing about ayahuasca i was like you know maybe this will actually set those pathways in my head where they're supposed to be it's nice to have a support system of you know strangers virtually but also like i got my brother here too so and i really wanted to go home just because it was so difficult but now i've just i know i have to see it through and just the fact that i say that and i'm going to do it is like a new confidence [Music] pretty much the sole legitimate response to coming to ayahuasca is based on a personal calling to it but as we've seen this is not easy this is hard and we do this not because it's easy but because it's hard that's what makes it what it is and it actually contributes to the effectiveness of it as a healing process so um you know this is not for everybody but for those who are right for it it's probably the best option there is [Music] to work with with these medicines you get a lot broader perspective and you and you have a quicker opportunity to jump to some of these higher levels of consciousness and and make that transition a little easier um even if it's just a short glimpse you have an idea in the back your head when you come back like okay it's possible and i actually felt the ayahuasca going through my veins and like fizzing through my veins and going all the way up into my head and i could feel it just fizzing and working around and at the same time it was telling me just lay back i'm taking care of you you know something's wrong with your brain chemistry i need to fix this and i have these visions of ayahuasca literally going through every cell in my brain and in my body and just taking the ones that were out of shape and just making them correct again and that's why ayahuasca is so incredible because it knows what's bugging you and it gets in there and it unlocks memories that you may not even remember you remember and allows you to process them and and in a matter of hours that's why some people call it 10 years of therapy in one night [Music] it's super important to do this work with people who are significantly skilled who know what they're doing who have the tools and the techniques for helping people navigate what can be a disorienting process so the the set and the setting is [Music] vital [Music] so [Music] the energy that is created by don howard and donner bear is so intense and just hearing people purge and just the energy coming off of everybody i almost can't handle it you know already i'm dealing with all like the weird the weird odyssey that's happening like in my body i can't handle it and something inside me just tells me to move and i just get up and i totally walk in the dark i i was frustrated [Music] we all have toxic negative or contaminating energy in our bodies that we're holding in our being this is simply a process of of disengaging that and allowing it to come out it's part of a cleansing process and often associated with healing that may be the very cause of of some subtle condition you have that needs to be alleviated [Music] is [Music] oh i don't know the act of purging and physically pulling things out that hurt kind of it made room for other things and i know i didn't physically like pull a bunch of pain out of my body but it really felt that way [Music] so the chicapa serves to clean the are clean the energy fields and make one more receptive to receiving medicine and then the chicapa becomes an instrument of transmission the reason for the tapping on the head has the effects of opening one's receptiveness opening the crown chakra in particular to receive energy through that portal [Music] i didn't know what more i could get from them because i've i've had so many journeys and so much transformation and and this trip has really been about the medicine teaching me that i need to love myself and i i had a profound vision the first night where the ayahuasca showed me everything that i love i i saw dolphins and whales something that i just love to the bottom of my heart and and people and nature and and then the ayahuasca turned to me and said why is it that you have so much love for all those other beings but but when you look at yourself you barely have any and and that really really resonated with me and and made me realize that so many of us including myself we just sometimes we're so concentrated on others we forget to pay the favor back and replenish our own our own souls [Music] something about this process though that brings the majority of people to a common realization and the realization is simple uh it's really not new at all in fact it's very very old but it's been largely lost in the modern day because of the an overemphasis on intellectual analysis and you know certain assumptions that the human mind can find all the answers [Music] well i tried to commit suicide when i was 18 my senior year in high school and it's a it's a thought that keeps coming back when you get into those dark places but i i know i knew the second that i woke up from having flatlined and and being called dead um that i wouldn't do it again ever um but that doesn't stop those those thoughts but what's been really interesting is how na now i can start to use that in a positive way [Music] [Music] work with these sacred plants of antiquity tends to bring one to the realization of core truths that not because someone else believes it or because we're supposed to believe it it's simply because it is revealed to us as is true [Music] it was almost like the ayahuasca grabbed me out of the bed because i was really in the middle of the experience and it was so intense i could barely get up but all of a sudden i felt this force just pull me out of bed and drag me into the bathroom and i'm standing there in front of the mirror looking at myself in the mirror and then all of a sudden i i split into two people and one myself and the other this part of myself that needs to love myself and the medicine was telling me look at look at that woman you know she's got a big heart she's she's an amazing person she's very caring you have to show her some love you have to you know she's going to die if you don't give her love and nourishment everyone needs love and nourishment and for the first time in my life i looked at myself as if it wasn't me and and just another being that really needed love and i felt so sorry that i hadn't given myself love [Music] and and for the first time in my life i i turned to my face in the mirror and and looked at myself into my soul and said i love you going into the next ceremony my intention was surrender because i feel like i didn't surrender my control enough the first time and i was too afraid [Music] and so i got very afraid very fast and the world was very vibrant very beautifully colored but so much so that i felt like my head was going to actually explode [Music] and so i said i think i need to go to my room and he said if you need to go to your room you can but you're safe here and if you need to talk to me again i'll come and counsel you and like help you and so then i just made the executive decision to leave the maloca of course i ended up naked i ended up throwing up all over my floor and i ended up sitting in the bathroom for about two hours trying to you know come back to myself and like i'm naked and i'm afraid and i don't feel my body then i was able to just separate my judgment of myself completely and it went in front of me and then i just said i am not ashamed i'm a good person and suddenly it it just got easier i was relieved and i stood up and i just stared at myself in the mirror for a very long time and i didn't recognize myself [Music] i know for my own personal growth oftentimes i don't even know why i'm coming to ceremony you know at this point for my own personal growth usually that clarifies after the ceremony in the midst of it though there's this consistent experience of patience and waiting [Music] hmm [Music] [Music] being an engineer i've tried to solve this problem myself for a long time and when i first started on this path i didn't have a really refined streamlined reason and have an anxiety about it how to put it in just a simple sentence here's what i'm looking for so when it was my turn to go up i went up there and i asked mother iwasco to basically unlock the part in me that's holding me back from being the person i want to be [Music] [Music] do [Music] [Music] what hit me again this morning my brother keeps coming up and as much as i feel like i'm getting to a better place and i feel like i am getting to a better place with that there is some deep trauma that's still there there's some deep trauma from from the time that i found my brother i found him the next point and uh i can still see his face sitting there extremely peaceful but dead and that's [Music] that's hard it's hard to see that um [Music] go back to all those questions oh god man why couldn't i've been there to do something about it you know why wasn't i there um [Laughter] why did that have to happen to him it should have been me it should have been me multiple times prior to that why my little brother [Music] oh and so there's still [ __ ] there there's still [ __ ] there that has to be cleaned out [Music] up [Music] i try to look at it you know i hear these people explain what they've seen and everything seems so real and vivid of what they saw and what i saw was foggy but what i saw initially was only like 15 minutes after drinking maybe 20. i saw a key floating in my mind and it was just there for a couple of minutes and i was having an internal conversation and i was like okay this makes sense there's a key here i want to unlock something so this must be the key but how do i get from this point to the actual lock you know what what's the path for the lock and then for whatever reason i kind of got out of that space in my head and it kind of all just went back to reality [Music] often people come in a state of relative turmoil a lot of friction in their lives and over a period of seven or eight days which is usually as much time as is needed to realize a shift in that sometimes it's a complete fix sometimes it's just a step in the right direction but uh there generally is a predictable improvement and the way people feel about themselves the way the the ease they feel with the medicine itself well now i trust it a little bit more you know being able to witness the transformation of strangers and it's like what should i be afraid of if it's helping people helping everyone around me it it's definitely for me i got the call to come here so i just need to stomach it better i mean i don't mind the purging so much it's just um the unlocking parts of myself and working hard to deal with the problems that usually we push aside that's the difficult part but i want to do that that's why i came here to change [Music] sat with that big cup laid back doing a lot of self-talk to just kind of relax breathe just sending like nice pretty colors down to your belly and just letting it calm calm itself out a little bit and and that was helping and that was great because it was starting to really come on maria's son was just starting and it felt like a uh i felt like it was in a lung is what i kind of equated to because there was this breathing aspect and this constant pulse slow [Music] steady it's like all right okay good but all that kept coming up was all of this extraneous work [ __ ] it just it was endless and that's all i kept getting was just this constant flood of work and i kept pausing and going okay how do i make mitch a better person how do i make mitch a better person what what can i do to help the world you know those kind of things and then it would just come back with all this work stuff i was like okay fine i'll go with that um and again i couldn't get comfortable and the rest of the evening was about dealing with this back thing again and trying to understand why it's happening and what is it that kind of keeps clicking that thing and sending it off everything's connected all aspects of ourselves spiritual mental emotional and physical are interconnected the key to the healing of a physical condition is actually to approach approach it from a causal perspective which is often rooted in a traumatic life experience or some psychological thing that's happened or some spiritual injury that one has received which is manifesting in a physical way or a psychological way yeah once i got up there and laid down it was a strange experience when they were talking about doing suction and don howard was telling me about this beforehand i was like oh they're gonna bring out some like rubber things that they stick on you and they push down on those you know they're gonna pull this stuff out and i lay down and donald bear's mouth is right on my back and he's several times and i could almost visually see strings getting sucked out of me and i don't know what those were or how they weren't they seemed to be living but they didn't seem to have any sort of recognizable life form to them they look like long strings but had a physical tangible nature to it [Music] me [Music] [Music] you know i felt like i was tracking a beast that's inside me that had been plaguing me hunting me you know limiting my bliss limiting my effectiveness and who i want to be and i wasn't even aware of it but it felt like the last shadow it is for me you know the way i've tracked it it's the thing that's keeping me from my highest potential and my highest bliss [Music] it's another beautiful part of this medicine she shines light on our shadow so that we can look at it and we get better looking at it and we get we get more curious about what that is more curious about that part of me that i've been denying or judging or guilting and shaming i get more curious about all aspects of myself because i know as i bring them into the light as i presence their experience their message their teaching i become more able to to offer it love and support listen to it be with it and slowly it becomes a part of me and sometimes that becomes one of my eventual strengths and when my when my weaknesses can become my strengths and i know the process of actualizing that then i start to become ever more powerful [Music] we are all very critical of ourselves i think but to varying degrees you know and i've always been very hypercritical you know and i'm quiet and i barely mess up if i can help it you know and it's always because i'm afraid of [ __ ] up essentially so i keep a very myself on a very tight leash so it seems like i kind of had to lose control in my own way to be able to um realize what i need to work through [Music] it was maybe one of the most challenging nights of my life it started when don howard came by and he has a habit of saying just the right thing so he said to me a warrior's heart beats his one heart and instantly i understood what he meant and it really kind of sunk in because largely this kind of work is is based on surrendering uh to the experience and the ego has a hard time surrendering and so the whole act of surrendering is is extraordinarily therapeutic just by itself releasing expectation the acceptance of what is oftentimes some of the most powerful um experiences and ceremonies are something completely unpredictable that we wouldn't have scripted you walk out with thinking where did that come from how did that happen [Music] i know my own my own makeup the way i am there's probably a lot to break down inside of me before i'm going to be open to these things it's not in my nature to ask for help and essentially that's what i'm doing here i'm asking for help from something that isn't tangible it's it's kind of a stretch for me [Music] yeah you know i'm sure i'm blocked off spiritually in some ways um so don howard when he walks around and gives you your little your little pep talk he you know he touched me on my heart and he actually said that some previous ceremonies but i didn't i guess i didn't take what he was saying literally and asked me if i loved myself and i'd never been really asked that question i never even thought about that i changed my attention that night just you know help me open myself up to you to the medicine [Music] it took me to a whole another place i don't want to guess what it was because i don't want to ruin the magic i started talking to ayahuasca and she started working on my heart and showing me things she was just showing me my family and the things that are important to me she's like well now that we've got that open we can move to other spots and that's when my brain just started just going just sizzling and i'm like what are you doing up there and she's like we've got to fix what's wrong in there and as i've mentioned before i had a problem with depression [Music] drank the cup even though every part of my body did not want to drink the cup i'm so over ayahuasca oh man i can't believe that i had to do it again but sure enough you filled it up you know two-thirds cup and i knew i was in for it so but i just resolved to just take it [Music] and i sat there and i contemplated puking immediately to escape from the situation you know but i didn't and i started to kind of lean over until i just couldn't hold myself up anymore and i went down to the mat and uh once again it was round two on the beautiful hill and i describe it as beautiful hell because every part of my body just wants to wretch and i feel feverish and exhausted and nauseous i'm curled up but the visions in my head are that you know beautiful phantasmagoria of this menagerie of beasts and colors and lights and kaleidoscopes but i didn't give a [ __ ] i was like oh okay i get it and i just sunk lower and lower and lower into this state where you know i've surrendered to my own death before but this was much much deeper and i fell to the point where i was literally nothing [Music] my body just went completely still i didn't have a desire to move i wasn't thinking about my back and my mind was completely still there wasn't anything going through it and then 15-20 minutes the medicine started getting in and doing its thing and i went right back to finding my brother right back to finding him laying there on the bed seeing his face knowing immediately that he had already gone but there wasn't the same emotional attachment to it that i've had the last three years and it was interesting because i started moving around the room not by choice but just getting different perspectives [Music] i slowly started seeing matthew's legs rise that's why it's by feet and this large trunk or vines kind of was growing up out of me and he came right up into it and disappeared up into the up into the air yeah he moved on i guess this is kind of the best way i can describe it right now it's still kind of unfolding it's not a process of becoming more repressed it's not a process of psychological dissociation from trauma it's an integration of trauma it's an integration of all aspects of ourself that's why this is integrative work to foster and to midwife and to birth a new self integrated with that experience [Music] all right i'm nothing absolutely nothing uh just gave up my my right to everything that i've ever thought i was or wanted to be just let it all go and um i started to to cry not sobs i didn't deserve those just soft pitiful tears of nothing [Music] i whispered i said uh i'm sorry grandma [Music] i'm sorry and she came and she said aubry get up [Music] i said i'll be get up and with tears streaming down my face last bit of strength i had i just listened okay grandma get up [Music] it's like there is a drum in the distance she was a drum quietly [Music] and like a like an animal just back to the very [ __ ] corner just at the brink of the absolute deepest abyss found a little bit of strength i said all right graham i'll fight fight with everything i have [Music] she was telling me she's like you know i've got all this stuff gathered up in here i need to get out we need to get rid of it soon i'm like well what's going to happen if i get rid of it i was like are you still going to be here because i want to hang out more and i'm like i'm not ready for you to leave yet and she's like why about other people i got to work on i said okay i said well how am i going to be able to reach you when i get back home to florida and she's like well maybe we'll figure that out tomorrow i said oh yeah i will see you tomorrow night when i and she's like yeah i said okay how do we take a a life-changing experience and and make it real and and see that into our daily walk the integration process is as important as the ceremony itself that's when we bring it home into our lives before the ceremony last night aubry gave me his special rock that grandma gave him and i was really really touched [Music] i don't want to be 50 suddenly and have a lot of things that i'm still dealing with from like my teenage years and that stuff can stay with you i started focusing on my fear again which is a problem um and i was just clutching the rock and it got very hot it felt like a heart it wasn't necessarily mine but i'm holding it and it was something precious um that was to protect me that i had to protect too and i just sat there with the rock and at the end of the ceremony aubry came and sat with me and i want you to know how much it meant to me that you did that um i haven't always had your back in situations and even though you might feel like you're nothing you're quite something to me [Music] you know you start to have choices to what you build back in your life have choice to remove all the judgments that separate us and keep us in our niches and close our hearts and there's a lot of old habits that i still have and things that'll take time to break but the real benefit comes when it's work i get to start from ground zero again you know even now um i've had quite a few experiences with psychedelics but even with you know natural medicines and i lost it even after this week there's still integration to go back and do um again a lot of the stuff with my brother is going to still be unfolding but it's a it's a good thing i look forward to it and constantly looking to to let him live on through me [Music] and and for the first time in my life i'm leaving here very confident about myself my love for myself and the love i have for me is no longer just in my head it's it's moved down to my heart and it and it's there to stay and i thank the medicine for that [Music] the first priority in this work really is is very self-centered and and appropriately so before we can be of optimal service to pachamama and humanity we must become fit for service [Music] and particularly with this medicine ayahuasca it seems the vast majority of people have a substantial and long lasting beneficial change in their entire psychic field and that includes body mind spirit heart and soul [Music] i'm aubrey marcus creator and producer of the film ayahuasca hi i'm mitch schultz director of the documentary first of all we want to thank you for watching the film but we also want to mention that while ayahuasca can have amazing transformational potential it may not be for everyone we highly recommend that you educate yourselves if you go down this path become very informed on who you're going to be drinking with where you're going and also your own personal head space yeah we can't stress the importance enough of set and setting and also going to ayahuasca in response to your own personal calling but do the research make sure you read all about it talk to people who've been there and make sure you're going to a center that upholds the highest standards of integrity and experience thank you so much for taking the time to watch this and if the message has resonated with you please share this with family and friends thank you thank you

Channel: Aubrey Marcus

Views: 607,200

Keywords: aubrey, marcus, aubrey marcus, optimized, personal journey, explore, personal

Id: HfM-HhLgDeY

Length: 51min 58sec (3118 seconds)

Published: Mon Nov 23 2020