All Praises Due To WAP | Brilliant Idiots with Charlamagne Tha God and Andrew Schulz

it's so stupid it's positively bruised yep charlemagne got andrew schultz we are the brilliant idiots and uh this week's show is sponsored by who schultzy man squarespace okay turn your dream into a reality with squarespace squarespace makes it easier than ever to launch your passion project whether you're showcasing your work or selling products of any kind with beautiful templates and the ability to customize just about anything you can easily make a beautiful website yourself and if you do get sucked squarespace's 24 7 award winning customer support is there to help head to squarespace.com idiot for a free trial and when you're ready to launch use the offer code idiot to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain let's get the show started it's time for [ __ ] to talk oh all right what is the talk english spanish what's the talk yeah rose dialed in what is [ __ ] talk bent leaves rovers and bins what does [ __ ] talk blind private island's the m boy just [ __ ] talk hey hey uh what's the talk um what is [ __ ] talk ay hey yo you killed that bro hey man city girls out this [ __ ] you know i always said the testament to a great female rap song is if dudes will sing it even though it's about doing things to dudes i don't think it matters when it's me okay go uh only because like you know of course me and every other listener right now have our eyes a little squinted like keep going according to the internet i'm gay so it don't matter like it don't count when i sing a girl song they they expect me to be saying boy this [ __ ] make boobies wedded in a whale they want me to be saying that they expect me to be saying that that's nothing yo but okay maybe not you but do you remember that song shoop by salt and pepper yeah i remember shooting let me get you back to the subject she'll paint the one though just because you don't know it no let me get it back to the subject no sex they can get hot make you work up a sweat would you shoot to the loo my darling darling yeah that [ __ ] was cool you don't know the words it's all good bro you know i know i'm gonna be honest with you i wasn't really into salt and pepper was dope um they were really dope my sister loved salt and pepper right hooks their hooks were amazing right i can't forget that hooks you know push it push it real good oh what a man what a man you can't forget the hooks but it's lyrics i remember hey yo yo yo baby poppy ooh come here here i go here i go here i go again girls what's my weakness man okay now chilling chilling modding my business some some dudes came around and i couldn't believe this i swear i swear [Applause] i started to say there's something there i swear i swear my name is my witness the brother had i don't know man i know this [ __ ] talk lewis poochie ysl [Laughter] all right what does that mean taylor school your old uncle what does it mean when a [ __ ] be choosing wouldn't be cruising choosing choosing or cruising i know what that mean that mean autopilot that mean you ain't showering weeks at least [ __ ] you got some [ __ ] in your teeth now too because you've got some salad in your teeth you got a whole [ __ ] garden in your teeth right now anyway uh [Laughter] i'm only saying that because she was making fun of me because i had a booger hanging out of my nose during the entire [ __ ] squarespace read in the beginning of the episode she let me read the whole goddamn ad and then at the end of it she's like oh you should probably take that gigantic booger out of your [ __ ] nose throw up taylor grow up all right um so you're really feeling this whap oh so you want to get right to it positively brilliant what a [ __ ] idiot what can i tell you what happened oh no you were about to school charlemagne on something well i don't remember the question you just asked the [ __ ] what does choosing people we off you taylor they don't even like hearing you talk i just was trying to know i was like no we can't tell you no they really don't like hearing you talk again they said they don't know why andrew gave you a microphone technically it was already there she just took it i just oh god you got you got you got you okay okay can i tell you what happened to me over the weekend real quick what happened to you over the weekend so i um you had that be good did you have a baby because this is like this is like starting like this you're not even coming off the [ __ ] this podcast it's like you in the starting five uh-huh it's not even five minutes in are you saying that you got a story this story better be fire we talked about [ __ ] we didn't talk about god damn salt and pepper this better be fire what to do with you know girls you know just being kind of rude to guys so i was in the car and i'm driving to my friend's house and i stopped like this guy comes up to me he's like yo my windows are up he's like yo what's up so i shoot him away whatever he's still trying to talk he taps on my window oh so i decided to give him a dollar like is this what you wanted act like oh [ __ ] he was with his friends and they just kind of busted on him and he kind of tried to cuss me out but the light turned green so you you rejected him by calling him homeless yeah he was really upset about it and now charlotte listen what do we what do we rate stopping the whole podcast to share that story and right before right before she cut you off shows you asked me what did i think about [ __ ] we're about to talk about wet ass [ __ ] and here comes taylor talking about homeless people yo i'm gonna be honest with you that's mike that's that i think the mic needs to get turned off for the ride i really do i really do i'm not even gonna lie to you i thought you would like that story i thought it was clever and i thought it was a good like uh slap back or punch back if you will come back i liked it it was good the punchline is there no the setup was horrible the setup wasn't good build it out build it out build i think i would have i would have brought you into the world with whap boom well listen to what we're in the car you know what i mean you and your girls are all wrapped up the seats are [ __ ] soaked just sliding off of them accept the scenario you know what i mean like literally you're trying to drive and you're you know you're slipping and sliding all over the place right so a girl so a dude pulls up you know i'm saying no you know a dude pulls up and a dude can smell it he was like yo y'all smell wet i smell some wet i smell some what i smell some what you hit a speed bump some rap shot out the window hit a homeless guy inside the face right there wow she pulls over the dollar was soaking wet right taylor the style soaked away because you brought it out of your other purse i brought it out it was in my mind moist style to the dude right okay what happens next he got offended he got offended but now we gotta punch this joke up yeah because see right now the only joke that would make sense he got offended because the dollar had a smell to it you don't you don't want that yo imagine the dollar smelled like george washington i don't know if i wouldn't do this yeah i don't see you can't be like that taylor you don't want to get you gave him the dollar right yeah you give him the dollar he's offended now he has to say something to you he rings out the dollar oh [Laughter] how crazy do we want to get with this he doesn't go crazy i mean the craziest would be like he rings out the whap into his own hand and then starts beating off right in front of you whoa whoa come but what if he was like guys can't talk like that only women can leave that leave that's the cardi and megan the style you know what if he's like this meal needs a little a salt and pepper listen jt from the city girls not jt young miami one of them say playing with me [ __ ] like playing with my [ __ ] playing with you [ __ ] like playing with my [ __ ] uh-huh i don't even know what that means but it sounds amazing that's the way it meant i don't think i don't think i recall i don't i didn't get it you know you should have asked them what the definition of broke means for them like they said what broke is oh you mean like what's the number yeah oh okay wait we're not done with it what is our out charlotte we need to out for this what is our punch out he's got to say something to her then she has to have one more line and then we're out so he's got to say something to set her up to bury him maybe we should just turn this into a dramedy bro oh we want to go real you want to go like he's sad maybe maybe what were you thinking he rings he rings the dollar and then he says to her like yo you know truthfully um i was just trying to get some money because i'm rushing to the hospital and i'm about to run out of gas you know i'm saying my child is you know in the hospital right now and i'm trying to get there because she's in the er but i might run out of gas so you know i know you're trying to be funny with this dollar but that's kind of disrespectful and then what you would have did taylor what you would have did then seriously what would you what you would have done if you had told you his child is in the hospital he's rushing to get to her his child has been in an accident he's low on gas he's about to run out of gas what you would have done then you could use my dollar to you could use that dollar oh wow so you want to give him a ride no to the hospital with his dying why was he not there already huh exactly he's trying to get there he's making a living so he could pay for them hospital bills okay so boom the guy goes damn all you got is a dollar and then somebody in the car goes cause we all poor whap i need it i don't know i don't know if that was it i i'll be honest with you i don't know usually i'm on board bro that one that wasn't it that wasn't it you know what listen shooters got to shoot bro we averaged 30 a game okay we are proven all right we taylor to the bench to the bench to the bench garbage minutes positively brilliant what a [ __ ] idiot all right andrew i mean why positively brilliant gotta be whap right everybody's talking about it we love it when girls talk about sex and the hotter the girls are the more we love it when they talk about sex simple as that whether it's a podcast whether it's a rap song whatever you got to do if you're a hot chick if you want to talk about [ __ ] you could be a millionaire if you're a hot chick willing to talk about [ __ ] and you are not a millionaire something is wrong with you simple as that i um i i i think i like what because i like what for all the reasons i like anything and for the reasons i've always loved something i love things that are polarizing i love things that people love and i love people i love things that people equally hate oh who people that make a living off writing think pieces with no thought uh the the the woke crowd that's so woke that they need to get some sleep because they so goddamn tired okay because because here's my thing if you're a certain age like if you're like i'm 42. yeah if you're over the age of 40 and you're upset at what you're really a hypocrite cause whap to me is very tame based off all the music that i grew up on and the music i listened to whether it was little kim saying i used to be scared of the dick now i throw lips to the [ __ ] handle it like a real [ __ ] had the hunt touch edit eddie jackman and then something something take it in the butt whoa what that's what she said exactly so why is wap kyle my neck my back my [ __ ] and my ass crack yeah that's crazy what the [ __ ] is t and i like why but wipe is tame compared to those records put me in your mouth megan and carter are doing what they're supposed to do they're 20 something years old those are the records that you should be making at 20. every time i'm on the gram i see women with their tongue out in the mirror you know showing they shape having a good time twerking they just doing it on a million dollar level what's the problem tell me the pushback i don't understand any of the pushback i can't even factor in it's not appropriate why what about this climate is it not appropriate i don't know people ain't getting their dicks this seems like you're sheltered in place you might as well get your dick sucked and if your girl doesn't do it right if she listens to what when cardi b said hit the dangly thing in my throat you know that part of the song yeah yeah all i thought about was it damn she don't got her chances removed that's not a tonsil that's a dangly thing in your throat no tonsils are the shit's back here that was you don't just snip that off dude i didn't know i thought that was possible no that's the case that's the [ __ ] a lot of women don't realize this that their [ __ ] is actually that dangly thing back there that's how women achieve orgasm if you're listening right now i'll as a biology biologist biologist neurologist gynecologist as a gynecologist also that too i'm all of them honestly the way the best way women can achieve orgasm is if the penis hits the dangly thing in the back of the throat like cardi b says that i mean it might it might be something to that because when cardi said it i saw a bunch of women agreeing that's it preached preach adam and i'm not gonna lie in my day and by my day i well you know i'm not gonna put that out there all i'm gonna say is what what i've seen i've seen women really enjoyed it hey now what do you mean in your day i've seen women i've seen women really enjoyed it i've seen women god damn it i've seen women take [ __ ] you know what i'm saying like just do their head on it make sure sometimes we gotta just get to it shows here i go here i go here i go again all right sometimes you just gotta get [ __ ] to it but i've seen women do that i've seen women make sure that the penis absolutely hits the dangerous thing in the back of their throat is what i'm here to say yo i yes they do that i um i actually i actually whoa whoa i just heard something she said women pretend you mean like when they gag they pretend if the guy has a small dick we're gonna make them feel better but i'm sorry if the guy has a small dick they're gonna make them feel better by acting like they're gagging on it when it they're not well that is absolutely horrifying to hear here i was here i was this whole time thinking i'm earning these hot but in reality in reality you're saying that girls could be faking the gags yeah sure i mean did you know this i know that you're single back in your ho days uh um no because well yeah i didn't know that i knew that uh but the thing that makes men better is when women just tell us the truth but i guess with dick size there's no need to tell me the truth because yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah cut out that true [ __ ] with dick sizes yeah there's nothing i can do about it you know what i'm saying but guys know i know i know guys i'm one of those i know the satisfactory dick i don't need to go listen i've heard stories of guys who are afraid to get head because their penises are so small that's a true fact because their penises are so small and that's so good and they're so good at head because they don't want to show off their oh i believe that about every guy that says he loves eating [ __ ] is that they don't have big dicks that's not true that's not true yes it's like dude guys who good at shooting usually aren't good at dribbling because you know i am a good vagina eater i think i think you're not thinking but i've actually worked at it i've worked at it i've read books on it the ultimate kiss i've studied this thing you know i really do know how to give good conga lingus and um i have a pretty decent size penis seven inches three fourth eight when it's warm out no a few inches of girth now here's the thing did you start learning how to eat [ __ ] after that uh after what happened with uh your girl and like she hooked up with that guy with a bigger dick remember she told you his dick was bigger were you like do i have to compensate do i have to compensate now with my tongue because um she got that hammer i think that might have been around the same time but actually i started learning how to eat it well because a young lady told me i was trash at it like straight up she told me i was trash at it so that's what made me go out there and become better at the kung galinger's game and by the way i hope that there's nobody listening to this podcast saying oh my god they're being so explicit today blame the whopper yeah all right cardi b and making the stallion have raised the bar sexually explicit talk is back at least for the week i'm okay i'm with you in that regard and i think it was needed i think it was needed bro i don't even understand why people are really upset about this record because it's just a song it's entertainment like if you don't like it simply turn the goddamn radio off you don't have to go listen to it on title or apple or spotify there's so much other music out there what are people upset what are people upset about what's gonna happen right i understand i understand back in the day like if you listen to this like satanic rock music you're worried that they were gonna go like shoot up a [ __ ] school or like shoot up a ball or if you're listening to some super dark [ __ ] you're going to do some horrible thing you're going to commit suicide whatever the worst case scenario if you listen to whap is you suck dick better that's the worst thing that comes from this song no are you are you trying to or you start going are you start going to the doctor because you know you realize you don't have that weapon you want to know why you have this vaginal dryness so you think maybe it's a lot of people with that dap you think there's a lot of drought i asked people there's a lot of desert-ass [ __ ] out there complaining about this song because they know what they're working with bro i'm not one to start any internet conspiracy theories but i think that a lot of people vaginal drivers is that's my theory vaginal dryness is common in what what is it a common symptom of stop oh god mark hey hey mark that dwayne jesus christ all right matter of fact we could just bleep that cause i don't think they'll figure it out that's a good mystery vaginal dryness is a common symptom of what stress i don't know old age menopause boom we're getting somewhere menopause oh old age older women sitting back watching cardi b and making the stallion oh get it get it in and they get a little jealous and a little envious so they get online and under a fake page and throw out those fake think pieces about how they're the worst thing to ever happen to music and how you know they're going to be what causes little young girls to be [ __ ] and thoughts and this and that you know what causes little young girls to be [ __ ] and thoughts when their dads aren't around okay or when they're badly influenced by they see their mothers from their mother all right okay you can you can pretty much let your kids watch anything if you're the one instilling the proper values inside of them already yo you saw that post duval put up nah what do you put uh so fire it doesn't exactly relate to this but i think it does but it's uh it's life is about perspective you know kind of like uh continues that conversation we had last week but it's basically like so there's two twins right and they have this alcoholic father one goes on oh i saw that i did see that right one of them one of the twins goes on to be an alcoholic because he saw his father the other twin goes on to never drink alcohol why because he saw his father life is about perspective right you could see something your parents are doing and go wow that's normalized i'm gonna do it or you can see something your parents are doing and go wow i would never do that you could do the exact same thing with a whap video you could do the exact same thing with [ __ ] everything stop acting like people are like such are these like um they're not dogs right you can't just go sit and then people sit down yes they're influenced don't get me wrong and you have to be concerned with your influence i just don't think any of the influence here is that bad suck didn't better influence to do what though because here's the thing megan and cardi aren't in that video encouraging anybody to do anything it's just an entertaining video right you watch it and you laugh what you gonna do norman needs dances you probably do that what you gonna do try to do a split like megan carter yeah you'll probably do that you know i mean would you want to run around a nice little fun house yeah you probably do that have you walked down the hall like kylie to open up a door yeah you probably do that but what is that video encouraging you to do hit like why do we think that you're to watch that video and immediately immediately want to go hit the block and sell some [ __ ] because here's the truth to the matter i love the city girls city girls lyrics are way filthier than that city girls lyrics encourage you to do way more than whatever megan and cartier talking about in the whap video but you know why y'all not attacking the city girls because the city girls aren't as popular right now yes now give this now now now the city girl's gonna hit don't get me wrong if it wasn't the pandemic coronavirus that album would be booming all throughout the clubs everywhere right now everybody would be on that album but being that they're not as popping as cardi and megan you know you can't get no clout off talking about them you know you you know you can't get no clout off saying you don't like what ain't nobody gonna retweet you talking bad about what megan i mean not talk about it about the city girls right now they will about [ __ ] though megan even said he goes she goes hello dudes was will scream slapping my knob word for word and cry about [ __ ] by a little boy it's the truth though slob on my knob like call in the cop check it with me and do your job come on man put it in your mouth by acanelli all of that stuff i think the very i think the song is brilliant i think the video is brilliant because it's been damn near what five six days and we still talking about it and anything anything that leads to a bigger cultural conversation which it did because it led to this whole conversation about music and the influence of music on young adults and people and you know that's those are good conversations i'm not mad at it uh i think that's what a great piece of art is supposed to do god bless what else did you see this week's shows that you thought was a positively brilliant honestly i made you say what a [ __ ] idiot oh um i don't know which i mean do you think kamala is going to be the deep dive like where where do we get in on that because go ahead i just think it's so funny you know what i think what a [ __ ] idiot is um there's this uh it's all the democrats like the super left-wing super left democrats not the moderates that are probably very happy with these choices but the super left it's gonna be so funny to see them all start to like justify biden and kamala to people that they were vehemently against within the democratic party because they're like establishment politicians it is hilarious to see them all start to fold back into the oh this is a perfect opportunity this is great you know there's that tweet going around and i can't verify it but like sean king back in i think 2018 was like two people actually that's accurate he literally goes two people i cannot get behind are joe biden and kamala harris and then literally yesterday tweets out oh kamala harris we got to get behind her a black woman in the oval office come on bro well you know um i'm a person that's been on record supporting kamala harris um i like kamala harris uh i would te and and like i've always said i would tell people to do their research on kamala has because what what turned me onto kamala harris was back in 2015 when i started paying attention to the progressive stuff that i heard she was doing you know as a prosecutor and in particular the back on track program back on track program it it took non-violent offenders uh on a path to like new jobs and helped them rebuild within their communities and even her stance on we that's why i never understood when tosi gabbard came at her the way that she did because it was always kind of widely known that kamala was a supporter of like marijuana like she had weed cases that she would routinely reduce to misdemeanors and we possession cases weren't even on her dockets like she wouldn't even charge folks for that so i it's it's weird to me it's actually a great um opinion piece that was written yesterday by a public defender in san francisco her name is nikki solis and she spoke on kamala being the most progressive d.a in california and what was so interesting about that article she said i thought let me see if i can find this i can read it real quick again i wish i knew more about kamala i just know that there have been people who are incredibly critical of her and she's a prosecutor right this is what she said nikki said i grappled with this idea of defending a former prosecutor for a long time but i have to say what i feel is right the record just to set the record straight on harris and the headline of the article is public defender i worked with kamala harris she was the most progressive d.a in california and she said that you know they didn't see eye to eye on a lot of things but she said for the most part she was a progressive prosecutor i think and again i need to look into comma more i'm sure there's plenty to be critical of but i'm sure there's plenty to be supportive of and i think it's actually a smart choice because they're going after the moderates the extreme left is never voting trump they're either not going to vote or they're going to vote democrat because that's what they do they're already locked in their ways everybody is fighting for the people in the middle and people in the middle who are looking at riding in cities and going oh my god i don't want any of that i own a home i don't want anybody to throw you know bottles at my windows people who look at the kind of unrest that you see happening right now regardless of how they feel about race or anything else they do want as trump often says law and order and who better to deliver law and order to those people in the middle than a [ __ ] prosecutor yeah it makes people comfortable man you know trump keeps talking about the suburbs and the the boogie man the the the dog whistles he's throwing out like oh black lives matter's gonna come to your house yadda yadda let me tell you something don't tell all you [ __ ] up you got 40 to 50 million people unemployed in these streets they don't come you living in these suburbs behind these gated communities you better go google tupac from the 90s when tupac was talking about how when you got this country that isn't taking care of its people and you got the wealth gap so extreme and you got these people at the bottom and these people at the top but the people at the bottom can see what the people at the top are eating at first it's going to start with knock knock knock hey we're hungry could you please let us in they singing a song next thing you know it's gonna be knock knock knock yo man we [ __ ] hungry could you please let us in next thing you know it's gonna be kicking down the door coming through blasting cause y'all got all this [ __ ] food and y'all ain't sharing that [ __ ] so america this ain't got nothing to do with race this got to do with money if you think for one second that black lives matter protesters walking across your lawn is the problem wait until [ __ ] in a in a few weeks when you start seeing [ __ ] jumping your gates because they know that's where the [ __ ] money and the food at and who better to tell black lives matter protesters specifically to not go and break into gates or break into those communities ain't gonna be just black lives matter though i'm just saying let's say it is let's say it is no let's not say it you just said it i'm going off yours i said poor people i said 40 million unemployed i'm going off you're hypothetical i said 40 million if i did i was wrong but i said 40 million unemployed people i said they said i actually said it's not about race i said it's about poor and rich right you're gonna have poor people jumping the gates of these communities right to get into these [ __ ] communities right by the way i live in one of those communities the point i'm making has nothing to do with race uh in terms of the protest what i'm saying is let's say you did need somebody to condemn the black lives matter protest now i'm not saying that's the right thing to do i'm saying let's say if you're part of the government you're part of the establishment politicians and you need someone to condemn it you can't have joe biden the author of the crime bill the guy who's got sketchy racial past be the one to condemn it but you know what you might want to do you might want to have that prosecutor prosecutor who is a black woman condemn it because she's going to get away less smoke and she's going to make way more people feel comfortable because she's not though that's actually what made that's actually what was one of the we'll see really no that was one of the really impressive things when everything was going on senator harris was on the front lines really talking people through these protests really talking about why these people are in the streets why these people are out there doing what they're doing she was doing a masterful job at that actually like i the best thing that happened to senator harris when she dropped out of the presidential race because it's like from then it's like her star just rose that's when maya rudolph started spoofing her on snl right and then he's protesting everything started happening george floyd started happening and she started getting out front on on she was the only person that said this on the podcast she was the only person who answered the defunding the police question perfectly well and didn't let megan on the view catch her up they asked her does she believe in the funding the police and she said well i absolutely believe in taking resources from these bloated police budgets and putting them back in the communities and then megan goes but do you believe believe in defunding the police and she goes well megan what is the funding the police book mean to you because i just cuz i just you just asked me and i answered because she's smart enough to know not to fall but that those words the [ __ ] police has become a trigger you know what i'm saying yeah yeah it's like it's like a gotcha it's like oh she really wants to abolish the police journalism for sure she answered that question the best out of everybody that week i actually said that on every so program that i was on here's the question right i think biden i think we all agree biden is a corpse right there's no reason that he should be running it's absolutely pathetic it's sad not voting for joe biden it is sad yes exactly presented exactly and it's sad that the democrats have even propped him up this long and they are thanking their lucky stars that corona has happened so that he doesn't have to do any of these public speaking events or he doesn't have to debate trump they're they're so lucky that this has happened and they'll probably want to extend this as far as it possibly can go as close as it possibly can be for the election to protect them but when we're voting for the president we really are voting for kamala because i think they give biden a year in there i think they give him a year and then he goes honestly i'm tired it's hard for me i'm too old for this kamala's going to take over i mean i think he's out of there in a year so is kamala are you ready to vote for kamala as your president i think that's the question you have to ask [ __ ] yeah okay i think senator harris should be on the top of the ticket now i thought that when she ran in the primaries i mean i i was asked like you can google it i was asked on like cbs or something they asked me like if i had to vote right now would i vote for i said senator kamala harris and i didn't know that was an endorsement you know i just thought i could just ask they asked me if i had to vote right now right what would i vote for and i said her but yes i think she's absolutely ready to run day one and that would be another smart thing for joe biden to do it'll be smart to show us what your shadow cabinet might look like you know what i'm saying reveal to us who else is going to be around you because i highly doubt you would just go see a hawkeye movie just starring hawkeye i might because i love the marvel characters but the democrats don't have that kind of cache with me but if you show me a hawkeye movie and then you show me like well captain america is in this too right you know what i'm saying our uh uh black panthers in this too even if it's just in the trailer for a second i might go check it out right that's all i'm saying but um yeah i mean listen senator harris to me is like is is is kind of like the cardian made video in song okay polarizing baby and i said this i said the reason she would be the best choice is because there's nobody else he could put on his ticket that would even move the needle bro i don't care if they love you or hate you are they talking about you are are you creating some type of energy do they have to pay attention to you right that's what senator harris brings to the ticket as far as marketing and promotion let's not act like it's not a goddamn party and andrew you know just as well as i do when you're promoting something you got to put something on the [ __ ] flyer you got to promote put something on the [ __ ] bill that people want to see okay are you are you going to put seats in the stands with this [ __ ] ticket right yes you will right any everybody else i don't know i can't i don't know anybody else that might might have did it for him in this way yeah i don't know but i would also encourage people go do your own research on senator harris i need to i need to look into it so i really don't know that much that's all yeah so don't listen don't listen to the the twitter don't listen to instagram don't listen to youtube don't listen to trump supporters go do your own research it's so it's so much stuff for me about her [ __ ] her record sorry why are we even allowing joe biden to run for president why is everybody okay with that like that is mind-boggling to me we had trump run for president i thought that way but he's not he doesn't have cognitive decline like i literally would rather i would rather let me let me really get this right let me slice this thin here i would rather a person who was sane and had their their wherewithal whatever that term is then a person who i disagree with on a lot of viewpoints than a person who didn't have their brain i think that trump doesn't have cognitive decline but you don't have cognitive anything when it comes to being a president yeah that's my only thing i would have no experience whatsoever but think about it when it shows think about this who would you rather watch your kid right someone who you disagreed with politically on things and even maybe disagreed with on how to watch your kid or someone who had literally lost their mind brother i'm not letting none of them watch my kids so we figured this piece to get you all right okay i don't even know why you said watch the kid are you on are you a q a i don't know i'm just reading i'm just seeing all these goddamn pizza slices and people's comments and [ __ ] yeah [ __ ] talking about pizzagate i'm not letting none of these [ __ ] watch my kids until pizzagate hey yeah give you another i give you another fun fact i'm not even gonna sit here and act like i i knew this the whole time i i learned this from the public defender uh the public defender nikki solis um said how kamala harris founded this coalition called the coalition to end the exploitation of kids and she said kamala spearheaded the task force to combat the human trafficking of young girls and that kamala didn't prosecute young girls for prostitution she recognized they were victims who needed treatment for trauma and not criminals who needed to be in jail and i read that i was like wow like that is one of those talking points that right now i missed all this goddamn pizza that would stand out because i see a lot of people like really going after these politicians going and going after these people that they think are part of this secret pedophile society pedophile rings so if you see somebody who has a record for years not somebody that just started doing this [ __ ] somebody who has a record of for years going against human traffickers and not you know prosecuting young women for prostitution and actually helping them to get trauma so they i mean helping them to heal their trauma that could go a long way bro yeah that's all i'm saying yeah i don't say that's that's why i tell everybody y'all just do your research the senator kamala that's all that's all i ask that's it that's it and listen make up your own mind ain't nobody making you vote i'm just telling you what i'm doing all right yeah that's it i'm vote i'm voting for sending the common laws and do you think people really have an understanding about like what da's and ags do no they don't right no i don't think i have one that's what i'm saying like i can't you could say all these things about kamala harris and her record i can't disagree with you because i don't know yet next week i'll do a little deep dive i'll figure some [ __ ] out etc then we can debate it but i just don't know if one what you're saying is wrong i assume it's right if you're saying it but two i don't know if there's other information out there to dispute it i've always heard her record especially on like marijuana convictions was bad i didn't realize which makes no sense right that's the that's like one of the biggest ones that i'm like how like she's even on this marijuana board i can't remember the name of this [ __ ] but she's been on this [ __ ] for a while like i i don't know i don't know i just i do know that you know because i saw somebody post yesterday they posted a meme and it was michael b jordan playing oscar grant in fruitville station and they said if you watch this movie and you were sad this was the prosecutor who prosecuted and it was senator harris oh it's not it's not even [ __ ] true senator harris wasn't she's not even in that district you know what i'm saying like she's not even in that district so how the [ __ ] would she be the prosecutor on that case that like that never happened so it's just like yo people get all of this different information via social media and one person says something and then this person runs with it and they start mixing things up and crossing lines and it just gets it just gets really really bad now how do you feel about her her white husband dog i don't care let's go but by the way that's a good conversation i would like for her to have because she didn't get married since she was 50. what got married yeah she got married in 2014. so i would like to know shocking to you guys you know growing up in oakland chief kids going to howard i don't i don't think so nah she had no kids no kids don't got kids but she don't have kids but you know the interesting thing about that is like i would love to go yeah somebody needs to ask her why she waited so long i'm not i'm not that's not a question i should ask i'm a guy now i asked her about her white husband before she what did you say she said i fell in love i just asked her i was like you know a lot of people question you because you have a white husband and she was like i i i grew to love who i grew to love right that's right wasn't nothing you could do nothing you could do ain't nothing you gonna do bro when that white [ __ ] dap comes through what is it no come on shows you better than this come on come on come on that white ass penis gun nothing you can do it thank you i knew i was missing something right there though but you believed in me you kept throwing the alley i threw the alley i threw it then i got the rebound he missed it you threw it back to me man [ __ ] we went with ali right back baby but no i'm happy i i'm um it's gonna be interesting and by the way nothing is guaranteed let's not act like this is a slam dunk victory in november okay nothing is [ __ ] guaranteed people gotta go out there and they gotta vote yeah you know and it's gonna be a battle it's really gonna be a battle it's gonna be funny it's gonna be interesting to watch i'm actually i will have to say what a [ __ ] idiot to the trump administration only because i i think i believe in them a little bit more when it comes to they petty and they social media tactics and how they attack people and they disappointed me yesterday yeah it was weak it was weird wrong come on man yeah like you literally first of all i was i was impressed that they had an ad ready for senator harris and i knew they were gonna do that they threw two ads out there but the ads are whack and i tell you why the ads are whack because the ads really show why senator harris is a tough [ __ ] because the ads are about her attacking joe biden and donald trump said senator harris was so nasty and so disrespectful and i can't believe joe biden picked her bro that says that says a lot that says a lot that i can call you on your [ __ ] and you still say man that's a bad [ __ ] she need to be on our ticket you know what i'm saying and i thought it was whacked that donald trump called her nasty and disrespectful for something he could use against biden senator harris was calling joe biden out for his racist segregationist bussing policy right trump you've been pushing the line a little bit on biden when it comes to how he talks about black people yeah so why would you give that up there's a i got to show you this this is my this is my favorite headline that i've seen because of course now all the headlines are coming back uh what is april 3rd 2019 kamala harris on joe biden's accusers i believe them now she's his vice president what's the problem just stop believing him like what's going on what happened between them like you're not gonna still be his running if you still believe him no think about it like this because i cuz because joe biden actually um put out a statement about that right this was that was in april when he said that because they were asking they were asking her about joe biden's inappropriate touching they didn't ask him about the reached it because i don't think the tarari [ __ ] was popping at that thank you it'll be wrong inappropriate touching and uh there are some people said like he like tried to kiss him or something like that yeah and if i'm not mistaken joe biden put out a statement about that well he didn't deny it he just said he got to start giving he said he know the times are different and he got to give women more space or some [ __ ] like that hold on let me find that i read that i read that quote before and that's why i was like yeah joe biden pledges to respect women's personal space and he kind of gave an apology i guess it was an apology let me see if i could pull that up yo bro i'm honestly yeah he said he said joe biden has pledged to be more mindful about physical contact with women hoping to draw a line under a controversy that is clouded his respected white house bid and joe oh he said social norms are changing i understand that and i've heard what these women are saying um yeah and he's gonna be more mindful it's the way i've always been it's the way i try to show i care about them and i'm listening the boundaries of protecting personal space have been reset i understand it and i'll be much more mindful so once again once again kamala harris speaking truth to power i believe the women joe biden coming through they acknowledge yo i was kind of foul salute to you kamala for not being afraid y'all gotta listen they gotta come with some better [ __ ] man i'm serious this [ __ ] is kind of weak bro they got to come with some better [ __ ] cuz i like the fact that senator harris stood on the debate stage and uh pressed the [ __ ] about why she was oppressed why the [ __ ] did you have these racist segregationist policies and i was one of those little girls that's why i don't understand why trump using that like trump you could have used that against biden and and you you calling a woman nasty and disrespectful because she's questioning somebody about her own the [ __ ] out of here y'all look this [ __ ] is i don't know man i was disappointed i've seen i've seen the trump campaign come with some much better [ __ ] you want some heat you want some heat i mean just to be something a little smarter like that wasn't smart that wasn't strategic man it just wasn't i'm excited though if trump does lose imagine how funny he's going to be when he like when they're trying to get him out the white house i just feel like he's going to be crazy petty that's anything's going to happen now i'm saying if he was to lose i would be funny how to get him out because i feel like he wouldn't want it you're not going to want to leave he can't wait to get out of that old ass building he lives in nice hotels and [ __ ] like that he don't want to be in that [ __ ] i've been seeing that in him bro what i've been seeing that in him well he don't want to be there i don't think he wanted no no you don't want to be in here yo would anyone bro like with anyone it's the worst job it's like the second you get hired half the country hates you the rest of the world kinda hates you or at least is very critical of you unless you you know i guess do right by every single country instead of doing right by your own it's it's just the worst job they tear apart your family tear apart your wife they make fun of your kid they literally make fun of your [ __ ] child like it's just the worst it's the [ __ ] and let's say hypothetically speaking that he's doing this not because of ego let's say he do it because he truly wants to help let's say any president do it because they just want to help let's just say that obviously they all have insane egos and they're all sociopaths to a certain extent but like let's say you really are doing this because you want to help and then while being helped you're just getting torn the [ __ ] apart every single day yeah that's the game these people but you know and he's not even getting paid and he's like don't pay me [ __ ] that that's why when you're a public servant uh it's not about you that's just the truth to the man you're a public servant it's not about you but it's also not about my family bro it's not about my kid like like it's just some weird [ __ ] i get it like i'm gonna tell you what else i thought was positively brilliant did you see the [ __ ] trailer for the fresh prince of bel-air like i don't know if you would call it a reboot but it's somebody like it's a re-imagining of the first prince of bel-air but it's a [ __ ] drama no you know that [ __ ] looks fine it's actually gonna happen you always seeing that that came out like a year or two ago you're a liar no i'm not i saw the interview with will smith and the guy yesterday but is it real no he's been discussed that a long time ago it came out that's why i gotta look this up is it real though no it didn't yes it did prove it taylor show us all right it came out i mean i saw it yesterday when will smith actually interviewed the guy because they're now in production of it but that trailer came out a year ago or so oh but it's actually it looks amazing and the reason it looks amazing is because um it's a drama right because when you think about the fresh prince like you know we laugh at the song like yeah hey west philadelphia born and raised on the playground where i spend most of my day set up laughing chilling all cool relaxing inside the pool but then a couple guys they were up to no good what was the up to no good they were up to uh started making trouble in the neighborhood what he got in one little fight what did they get in the fight for it looked like it was over basketball but we don't know what they really got i don't know do you know how much trouble will smith must have been getting in in philadelphia for your mama to ship you all across half all on the other side of the [ __ ] country from philadelphia to bel air that's a good ass point somebody must have been trying to kill you or something you know what i mean like you must have really got into some [ __ ] what do you think that he got him leave too then the mom didn't leave because she got that whack and they weren't gonna work they weren't gonna let they weren't gonna yo i'ma tell you for real yo maybe semi rap though she probably had a she probably had a boyfriend that was with the [ __ ] the boy was like look i'ma tell you something now your [ __ ] good enough to defend you but not your son not your son i can't help you i can't help you son you know he's boom all right you gotta fight his own battle but you i ain't letting nobody hurt my wife nobody can hurt them we're gonna keep this river running let's go keep this river running we're gonna keep this god damn river running you hear me okay yo you know it's a shame bro you know how amazing and like passionate preachers are when they speak about god and they speak about life yes sir we need a preacher who like just breaks away from the congregation to just talk about [ __ ] in that same way like imagine that same cadence imagine that same direction imagine that same passion but talking about whack bro just think about that this should be a deep dive yo let's talk about it bro let's talk about it play some ass first oh my god this episode is sponsored by while we're talking about waps you know what you need for a waff you need a had you need a hard ass dick if you're gonna have a web you need a hard ass dick you heard me okay and how you gonna do that you're gonna do that with blue chew same active ingredients as viagra cialis all those things only it works twice as fast you're not sitting around for an hour waiting for that [ __ ] to get in 20 minutes boom you're ready to go and you give your girl you give the lady you're trying to impress you give the side chick you give whoever it is the night of her [ __ ] life [ __ ] it make a weekend go away magical weekend for two three i mean you gotta have enough dick for as many people as you want bluechew.com promo code 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something shows you don't understand how accurate you are with that uh actually i actually had that conversation this week with a great great friend of mine um who i love dearly brother vagina is god what what what why are we lying to ourselves everything creates everything we do revolves around the vagina we create life through the vagina life comes out of the vagina life goes in it we all work hard so we can have a little bit of change to take care of our vaginas because in the words of jt and young miami broke [ __ ] don't deserve no [ __ ] you understand what i'm saying yes when we talk about vagina when when you when you talk about it in disrespectful ways and you know you talk down on it and you talk about wanting to beat it up and you talk about how you don't love these these hoes and you know [ __ ] ain't [ __ ] all of that nonsense it's it's it's complete garbage we worship vaginas but what if they want us to beat it up well you try your best but as taylor told us they lied to us no okay that's oh is that not god is god not a forgiving god is god not a forgiving god come on now you put that little you put that little whap in somebody's shoats and you think you're doing something and she's just uh uh instilling that confidence in you as only as only a faith and a higher power could only a god would be that merciful and give you that kind of grace that's what that's what that's what women need to start calling men with little penises that's what they do to us they give us grace grace yes that's grace yes that is grace the vagina's god jokes the vagina might be gone you have a really good like preacher like he had the face right and everything yeah you had the cadence going i kind of wanted you to keep talking about vagina keep talking i would have been i would have been an amazing scammer i promise you yes if listen and why scam i mean preacher if things if things if things that wouldn't go right i had a i had another backup plan um but now i'll just be a pastor really what what denomination huh what religion oh i don't know how about you said denomination i was like what the [ __ ] is he asking me right now i thought i started to start i started the name decepticon don't say optimus prime megatron isn't it denomination it is that right yes all i'm simply saying is i really do truly believe that i believe women and i and and and schultz isn't going to agree with me on this i believe women are the closest thing we got to god on this planet bro interesting yeah why won't i believe you on that i don't know sexism i mean i am sexist [Laughter] but in the good ways what i'm in the good ways of sexist explain like i don't think you should have to protect yourself that's my job to protect you okay that's very sexist because i'm not looking at you going oh you're capable of protecting yourself just as well as i'm capable of protecting you that is sexism taylor how you gonna say that as a black woman when all black women say all day long is how we don't protect y'all yeah no but in a way you know how he's explaining it it is yeah because at the end of the day sexism is hot like women love sexism you know like i don't ever let my girlfriend let me look up the definition before you even taylor do you want men to protect you or not taylor do you want that black men to protect you or not i don't need all men to protect not all men but your man should he protect you yes okay okay now see i don't agree with that taco what if you're walking by yourself uh-huh right and some guy say two guys just jump you god forbid for no reason it's just some dudes it's just some dudes sitting on the step watching you get beat up like that ain't my girl that's [ __ ] up they're not supposed to intervene no you're right you're right that's sexism the world runs on sexism before you watch we think we're going to intervene if a dude's getting beat up we're going to videotape it [Laughter] right the dude's getting beat up [ __ ] outta here bro it says sexism is prejudice stereotyping or discriminating typically against women yes on the basis okay i discriminate on women on the basis of sex in terms of i will not allow you to fight for yourself i will fight for you i will protect you i will provide for you now is that a stereotype though meaning that if a woman is is getting into it with a man all right should i just assume she can't fight yes exactly no you shouldn't all right should i just assume she can't be the man uh yes you should are stronger than women though say it with your chest say it with your chest because that seems sexist what you just said that was wild sex is right there sounds like we got something in common whap you gotta be specific taylor you gotta say men are physically stronger men hurt technique that's not true hey bro with hey because he made us different why'd he make us different why did he make us stronger why did he make you guys emotionally stronger he made us stronger you ever had a kidney stone say what you ever had a kidney stone i don't believe in them i never had one either i'm sure that uh chris has had an infinity stone chris had everything [Music] how was the pain chris because i'm prepared to argue it was bad as child birth and it lasted two weeks and no child i argue i have my wife beating that category that's sexism that's what i always hear men say they say kidney stones feel like childbirth how would a guy even know what child birth is stephen well i'm guilty then because that was unbelievable pain what were you what were you saying like when you felt the pain like what kind of sounds are coming out i was on the floor throwing up i i had to go to the hospital twice you have contractions whatever they were i don't know but it was it's the same concept it's something moving through a space that's too small for the space yeah that's all it's the same thing you all know it's not a huge like ladies yeah insane it's not a human but i'm saying all that to say women are designed to take a different level of pain than men are because we can't even can you you know what chris said kidney stones took him out nonetheless pushing out a whole human being yeah you know what i mean different level so yeah so you guys are stronger in terms of your ability to take on pain okay but that's sexism god made things like that you gotta allow sexism to be part of the culture is it sexism or just the way uh biological constructs yes that's what it is are you saying that's what sexism that's what sexism is it's built off of biology that's why we can't be against sex like when you try to act like men and women are the same you're gonna get a lot of trouble but if you just acknowledge that we deserve equal rights you deserve equal opportunity you deserve everything a guy should have but we're all so different then everything's good does it hurt when girls poop because i've never seen anything where a girl like you know how on movies the tv shows when you know our stomach hurts we gotta run to the toilet and yeah i've never seen that with a woman it seemed like women just get it out quick no it wouldn't retreat huh i'm just trying to find some physical contrast well not i've never been constipated before but like whatever you eat it will it's gonna come out is it ever so much that sometimes it comes out of the vagina hole too no that's not how it works no i think i think that women i think that if we had to equate strengths of men and women i think that at the end of the matter rating we would all end up with 99. say again based off i said if we all had to equate our our strengths as men and women at the end of the matter rating we would all end up at 99 just based off all of the different things like physical emotional mental spiritual nurturing whatever it is maybe maybe it's not that we end up in 99 but maybe it's like we got you know 100 we have like uh 80 points to go around and sometimes we have more points in like the strength category they have more points in like the emotional category like it's just but at the same time we all get you know when you say emotional because men are definitely emotional no it's not that we're not emotional i think that women have a more complex emotional spectrum okay so like you feel more things we feel less things and we feel them way greater so where women feel a million different things on a million different levels men feel angry happy sad hungry hold on hold on hold on men feel the emotions that society tells us we're allowed to exactly yeah until until we do the work on ourselves to allow ourselves to feel all of these other emotions i think a lot of women feel those emotions already naturally yes you know you know women will say things like oh you want you open up yeah i'm all vulnerable society tells me we ain't supposed to do that yeah right so so then our emotional reactions are only shown when they hit the extremes and we can't bottle them up anymore whereas women women are allowed and rewarded for having these uh you know lesser emotional output not even outbursts is the word but like they're just like yeah i'm just feeling a little grumpy today you're just allowed to feel that way where guys we just gotta be like nah i'm good stiff upper lip let's go absolutely let me ask you questions so that's sexism that's gonna say and it shouldn't be the term of like oh that woman's acting like a man if she acts or is her emotional state is not with a typical no we don't say women are like a man no you guys never said that before when we call you crazy it's because we're judging you based on a man's a man's emotional spectrum so if you're behave for example if i go yo you're acting crazy i'm saying that as if one of my boys acted like you because i would call him crazy if he was acting the way you were acting that's what crazy is whenever men call a woman crazy though like i've been called oh taylor acts like a guy because i'm not as per say soft or like i'm not as emotional or that's refreshing i like that kind of stuff but a lot of guys don't like that though yeah [ __ ] them do you know that yeah i don't yeah i don't like to do that either i don't like to do that with men or women i don't like to say somebody's acting like a guy i don't like to say somebody's acting like a girl i'll say something exactly and i don't like i don't like calling people [ __ ] because calling them [ __ ] is calling them god and why would you call them something that you actually enjoy you understand what i'm saying and i hate what i hate when i hear women call guys [ __ ] because it's like what are you saying yeah you're calling them yourself you know what i'm saying like taylor tell me when you call a man a [ __ ] what do you mean by that i guess like you said like i'm not insulting myself because i [ __ ] but um yo what do you mean but i want to hear it i could see so he's going to contradict herself and it's fine i'm not going to teachable go go go no but i know when usually when women call a man [ __ ] it's like they're they're soft and like they're being a punk all traits sadly that some people label on women especially the soft part okay not the punk part but per se but the soft part so you're using you're using the worst version of yourself and you're calling it to someone else yeah when i call someone a [ __ ] or when i call someone a [ __ ] i'm not talking them i'm not talking to them as someone who's being a woman i'm calling them i'm saying you're acting as if you get entered you're acting like you get penetrated yeah like you're acting in a way like you get penetrated no it's the same thing i'm gonna be honest i have to i would have to uh yeah every time i've done that in my life it's been wrong because like whether you call the person the p word or the b word or even say stop act like a girl like we do that and it's that is very insulting to women because i'm gonna be totally honest with you i know some women that is harder than all you [ __ ] right right is this the truth to the matter i'm just i've i've always had more women around me than guys and it's only because women have shown shown me to be more tougher and more logical now now i ain't talking about toughness when it's a physical altercation time to fight i'm just talking about the rigorous [ __ ] that you got to deal with in everyday life on an emotional mental spiritual level only women gonna help you get through that tell you that right [ __ ] now especially black women that's just the truth to the matter i i am who i am right now because of my mother and my grandmother and my my father definitely assisted in that process but a lot of the negative things that he instilled in me right the the man things my mother and my grandmother absolutely balanced out if that makes sense you know what i mean i don't know i don't know what by i don't know what my mind state would be if i only listen to my father because i mean i love my pops but he just was a [ __ ] in a real way right you know you know what i'm saying like my father's the type of person we'd be sitting around and three's company will come on and my dad say look at that maggot but you didn't say maggot he was like you're living with them two goddamn women and ain't doing nothing right that's the kind of stuff that seeps into your brain as a young child until you have a woman the divine feminine right who can say no that's not how you should be talking about people yo that's not how you should be talking to people is that where like sexual harassment comes from is that the seed of it where like he's upset because that guy's living with two girls and he's not trying to [ __ ] neither one of them right and then you hear that and you're like oh [ __ ] if i don't constantly try to [ __ ] girls people think i'm gay and now anytime a girl walks around or she's cute or a girl's walking down the street or a girl drives by or whatever now you're like i gotta hit on this girl or else people around me will think i'm gay that's a great statement but she led with sexual harassment so i will say no sure all right i don't know why you live with sexual harassment what do you call it street harassment uh stress cat calling cat callings yes but but what you're saying is true the the the constant trying to prove that you are a man yes that's what you're taught men do sleep with a bunch of women pile at a bunch of women be a pussyhound yeah right that's what you're taught so yes that is instilled in you by usually your father or uncles or older people in your life like that's just the truth to the man i tell y'all the story all the time when i confronted my father about cheating my father looked me dead in my eyes and said to me oh you only got one girlfriend one one day you gonna understand so in my mind i'm like am i supposed to have a whole bunch of girls one's too close to none bro i was i've always been like a faithful dude that could be with one woman you know what i'm saying so yes if if i'm out here cheating and creeping whatever it's because my daddy instilled something in me that was wrong i was broken yeah i was a broken little boy you know what i'm saying i was a broken little boy and that's why i had to go do the work on myself you know what i'm saying i had a lot of trauma can you tell i've said this before in front of you i think so when i got caught it's just an interesting expectation to be upheld it is right it's like it is being a man bro fight for your masculinity it's exhausting like it's exhausting fight for your masculinity every second wait wait being society's version of a man have that like clearly i don't feel like i have to fight for my masculinity every second okay i've got my balls tucked between my legs and my dick on top it's i felt like i had to fight for my masculinity i don't feel like i have to but i also haven't had the same experience as other people have grown up so i now it resonates with me more like to people who constantly would just be like hitting on every single girl they saw it was like oh you are fighting for your reputation you're fighting for your masculinity in a lot of ways it's not even about the girl it's about yourself so you're cat calling this girl it's always usually with their other friends yeah so your friends think you're somebody not so you can be with this girl so when she rejects you don't be upset because it never was about you getting with her in the first place yeah yeah it's about your ego but that's why we always say men lead with ego on all these issues our ego says we have to [ __ ] a bunch of women our ego says we can't be faithful to one girl you know what i'm saying like yo come on we used to give guys [ __ ] back in the day when they only had one girlfriend we never did that well i mean but you know what i've always said shows the true story i've always said you've always been a good example because when i've seen you with your woman that was the one woman you was with that's right it's in my mind this is you know this he's still faithful now but i'm talking about the conversations we're talking about eight nine years ago you know when i used to live listen when i used to live for an out-of-town shoot where are we going to win [Applause] i am so glad i gear i grew up because i had a lot of work in them screech you hit me different times i had a little work in them screech i was a i was a wild boy now but it's good to get that out good to get that out the system it was all ego i'm telling you it was all legal it was me um coming into this new version of the idea of me being able to try on the [ __ ] cape bro you're the superhero you want to try it out i never been this version of charlemagne five six years ago tv and breakfast club booming you know understand like and as a wise man told me one time a superhero gonna test out his superpower it's like a girl gets a girl gets a boob job she's going to wear some cropped shirts she just wants to see how them things operate in the real world she wants to see what she's going to get she wants to see if she goes to the nightclub you know and you don't blame her hello deeper like you know you're a young black man who grew up on a dirt road in montgomery county south carolina and um you get to a certain position and now these women that you either grew up looking at in king magazine or watching on tv speak on it be on tv now whatever talk about it blue checks you got that blue check box hey they've been hearing about me talking about this little seven inch three fourth eight when it's warm out august comes they won't see what it's about yeah i mean you on the radio talking about sucking farts out of women's ass as well let's see about it they want to see what's up if i'm really about that [ __ ] i'm kicking on the goddamn radio they got a dangly thing in their throat charlemagne they need that [ __ ] moved out the way that's all i'm saying so yes it was a wild time about eight nine years ago but it was all driven by ego and the best decision i ever made in my life was 2016 october 2016 when i said i'm gonna grow up and stop being a little ass boy and start being a [ __ ] man and be a real father and and real real husband okay and my life has been amazing ever since now i want y'all to really think about this and i'm not even [ __ ] joking yo go back and look at old pictures of me y'all give dr sandy a lot of credit and dr sandy deserves a lot of credit but one of the things dr sandy instilled in me was a lifestyle change when i stopped all that drinking all that that that smoking you know all that staying up all night eating bad you know sleeping with a bunch of different women those dark blotches used to see in my face yeah that was just guilt and regret oh okay that's that's that you get those blotches in your face when you ain't living right when you out here doing wrong by your girl every time i cheated on my wife a little patch got darker you know what i'm saying so if you ever thought i was out here looking like a bruised banana or a bruised eggplant that is the reason why but boy when i change my lifestyle clear it up and and stop leading leading with ego and i mean i mean am i not glowing wow you might be glowing bro am i not going come on look at the glow no it's true dude i didn't see the glow on top of your head yeah honestly the lights are reflecting off the top of your head you have like a little halo thing going it's amazing god no god know what i'm do listen god knows what we're all doing oh you hear me yeah he knows he he or she knows what we're all doing we can't lie to our creator so when you see somebody i'm telling you what they're going through you'll see it all in their face you'll see it in their eyes when they are living the way they're supposed to be living glow i just had to check my [ __ ] make sure i'm cute that's been cute let's pay some bills and um let's do a little uh [ __ ] you won't care about next [ __ ] bills yeah we gotta hit ask an idiot today you know what [ __ ] let's just all right let's take a break for a second uh from tight muscles tough workouts signs of aging to simply making it through each busy day everyone understands what it feels like to be tense and sore so everybody can benefit from thera thera1's cbd products now you know i [ __ ] with cbd uh but this brand of cbd was started by dr jason worsland thera body exists to provide you with the best scientifically validated natural solutions to help soothe your body and relax your mind it started with the revolutionary thera-gun percussive therapy device when dr jason saw the benefits of using cbd in his treatments he created thera1 to bring you cbd products done right okay a lot of cbd products claim organic but still contain a 30 filler and these fillers are potentially toxic with their ones industry-leading cbd products you can ease discomfort soreness and stiffness fight the effects of inflammation support better sleep quality and that's all crucial for 2020 trust me okay there are one test their products four times before they get to you every product is usda certified organic grown in the us and their cbd extracts are the highest quality available anywhere their one cbd products are full spectrum that means it's the most effective because it contains all components of the hint plant simply put there one customers are truly getting all the good stuff okay you can use thera one's warming lotion in your morning routine the cooling lotion or massage oil to recover that's what i use after i work out body bomb for targeted relief and the sleep tincture to drift into a deep night's sleep i get that little cream and i put a little on my forehead here a little on both temples and rub it in my god you'll sleep like a baby why do people say sleep like a baby when babies don't even goddamn sleep why do we say that why we gotta really take some of these old sayings that we use babies rarely i mean they sleep but they sleep at the hours that you're up so don't really matter they're saying when they sleep like a baby like you could kind of turn on the lights they're not gonna really wake up like that if they're really sleeping they're not gonna wake up like that okay well now through label day which is monday september 7th there one is offering our listeners a buy one get one free for all thera one products but you've got to go to thera1.com idiots if you don't love what you get from thera1 send it back for a full refund within 30 days of purchase that's t h e r a e dot com slash idiots for a buy one get one free for all there one products through labor day um what you got this is from d hill underscore fit what would a united states look like if all races truly had an equal start and slavery never occurred do you think one race would still rise as dominant just wondering what america without prejudice or systematic racism would actually look like would one race rise is dominant i think that it would be sort of like it is now um where different races would thrive in different fields um but it would be very competitive because you know we don't know if certain races make great doctors you know you got all these stereotypes so this grace makes great lawyers this race makes great doctors this race makes great basketball players we don't know because i think a lot of times based on your race you gravitate towards certain things you know what i mean it might be some fire asian rappers out there jen may not be the only one yeah you know what i'm saying it might be some so it might be a lot of amazing uh italian basketball player i don't know you know what i mean it might be some great i'm sure it is great black lawyers but i'm just simply saying we gravitate towards certain things based off what our race is so i think it would be very competitive but i think um i think you would you'd be surprised at what people could do yeah if opportunity yeah i think people always find a way to like create hierarchies to like make themselves feel better without doing anything because that's all hierarchies are right it's just like how do i give myself status without working for it oh i have blue eyes and blue eyes are the best why are they the best you go to countries where everybody has blue eyes and they like brown hair and brown eyes because that's what's unique you know so it's like people always find different ways to create hierarchies what i think what would happen is maybe those hierarchies wouldn't wouldn't be like racially specific maybe it'd be about religion or like maybe dicks you know it would definitely be a big dick it would definitely be dick size but i promise you yo but even in history no you didn't see that there are times in history where i think it was like greek history or roman history i forget you could look it up but like where they s they tricked everybody into thinking big dicks were um gross and they were like animalistic and it was their way of like fighting back against big dicks so the people in charge tricked all the women into wanting little dicks and that's why those greek statues all got those tiny little dicks like me yo chris chris you know [ __ ] how are you just telling me this and you know the story i'm sorry yo chris how are you just telling me this and you know i have a phobia about big dicks yo chris no i know you would have been the first one you've been the first one yeah get them big dick animals out of here i've been leading this tribe so yeah all these big dick [ __ ] is it greek or roman what is it chris greek it's greek right and and break it down exactly there's a racial component isn't there yes they're egyptian teachers uh i don't know about that but i know that in the in the artwork they they specifically tried to celebrate uh smaller men in that regard it wasn't the case in roman and uh you know the great the greeks obviously had a very liberal attitude towards homosexuality too so that was part of it what a [ __ ] waste of stone i mean god damn nobody appreciates low dicks not even on a nice statue you should have been in greece bro greece they loving little dicks out there dogs i don't know i don't have a little dick say well i had a big clearly i would've had a big one in greece you would've had a big old greek dick bro that's what you gotta do it's like not for real though yeah they call you the greek freak bro i'm gonna start calling myself that around the house baby i need you to call me bog d from now on the [ __ ] you mean bog d big old greek dick get that dick bogged down in your [ __ ] oh my god what is happening what's going on yo what's what's really going on [Applause] he turned 13 again because [ __ ] is god that's it vagina is god thanks all right women are god go taylor go all right next question deep in that ditch gotta get a [Laughter] oh my gosh oh my god crazy [Laughter] maybe not oh what it always christmas time saw off this dick put it in the middle of times square now you got your christmas tree for town square with this big whole day wrap some christmas lights around monday and you put some christmas presents on the bottom lipstick hey you got a big old christmas tree that's how they talk in the old days too got this big old goddamn christmas tree dick all right you think them balls man balls them gifts lick them gifts girl let them give something to this big old christmas tree those ain't balls those ornaments on that goddamn christmas tree you see them goddamn ornaments under that goddamn christmas tree now it's in the middle of the summer [ __ ] talk about christmas so let's dick out pull this dick out the middle of the stomach talking to his wife now come on now don't act like you don't like this christmas tree now you see them ornaments now why is they always gotta go to the country come on now gonna be the angel and get on top of this tree oh my god come on taylor give her a video give us another question before we get right back into this hey hey the reception for the reception for the tv isn't working honey can you fix it why take you want me to bring my remote over there to change the channel can you say tv you want me to bring this goddamn optimal remote over there to change the goddamn channel now come on now you got to press the buttons now come on now press the button right underneath the netflix button touch that watch that number come on oh you said come on come on what you trying to turn can't turn on nothing can't turn on this tv without this goddamn remote now [Music] oh my god what is wrong with the hedgehog from calvin underscore knox 92 okay what new industry will pop up from this or what industry will look vastly different after covet i don't know if it's a new industry but uh you're going to see a lot of variations of the audio business a lot you know um because i think that the kind of content that we're producing like whether it's podcast uh i think that there's going to be you know scripted audio content which already exists i think it's just going to be a lot more of that because i think that we showed you know through a pandemic this is this is what people want they want information they want companions it's like it's like same thing with radio like radio has always been people's companion people get in the car and they turn breakfast club on in the morning or they turn angie martinez in the afternoon or dale hughly in the afternoon because they have a companion that they can ride with i think it's the same thing with podcasts yo let me go see what charlotte and show's doing i'm on my ride home i feel like i'm with them i feel like i'm kicking it with them so now i think it's about uh storytelling i think you're gonna see a lot more storytelling in the audio space you know what i mean that's that's that's what i think that's yeah i agree man i think that sounds right just more like uh kind of advanced um scripted higher production podcast probably but also now this since we're at home i think there's this great opportunity to do visual i think you see like all these podcasts that don't have a visual aspect i think a lot of them are like yo let's just cook up some some video for this because we're not doing nothing anyway we might as well but yeah i see that for sure um [Music] what else chase 589 says what's the song that brings you closest to tears i don't know but whatever charlotte was just doing with that southern character brought me very close to i don't even know how he started that oh yeah i got a song that'll bring you closer put it put it in your goddamn mouth baccanelli cause when i put this goddamn christmas tree in your mouth and hit that little dangly thing in the back of your throat you're gonna start gagging and your eyes gonna start watering and you gonna cry you're gonna cry goddammit all right put it in your mouth roccanelli that's that's the song that brings tears to mind tears of joy though tears of joy right tens of goddamn joy uh-huh here's the joy cause i'm glad i got the kind of bald d that [ __ ] brings tears to a woman's eyes and i can touch that little dangly thing in the back of your [ __ ] throat okay and and charlotte that's exactly how a woman talk to you when you got a little dick and you talking to her like that you feel that bald deed don't you you feel that bobby don't you okay okay yeah yeah sure sure whatever you say yeah bulk d bulk d i don't know what a bug b is what is it before you bought a window oh bog d go bug d go i think it's balls deep now it is you're saying i'm saying bog d big ol greek dick that's what the [ __ ] i'm saying bog d all right i know what i'm saying bog d okay of all balls deep has always been the stupidest thing ever ain't nobody on in the history of the world ever put their balls in a vagina no you disrespect god like that you go up to the balls you put the dick all the way to the balls i know that's how everybody [ __ ] as you go all the way to the balls like why are we acting like that's hard to do exactly what if you got a two inch penis balls deep you still balls deep that's no bragging balls yo i went balls deep on her last night well be fire if you're like yo i just went head to head i went head deep on her bro and then it filled up i filled the whole thing up head deep that is big dick all right because there's so much left after you put just the tip in yeah you don't think you don't know what i'm talking about like you know when you put like a like a thimble on your finger so you a sewing needle like you know that little monopoly thing hey man i just want to tell y'all that this episode was brought to you by wap so uh any sexual explicit explicitness that you heard in this episode lame cardi b and meg the stallion okay i want to be i want to be as sexually free as cardi b and make the god damn stallion and i'm going to tell you something man salute to make the stallion uh calling out here calling men bottom feeders i think that's a very derogatory term for an ass eater why and um i think it's a slur bottom feeder is a slur really but i'm gonna tell you something i ate so much goddamn ass on saturday i'm not even gonna lie to you bro talk to me about it i was just eating i was just i just i don't know it was just something about even though she called us a bottom feeder it was just something about hearing that and a record that kind of just like empowered me you know what i'm saying when megan was like if he eat my ass he's the bottom feeder like damn you you like it enough to give it a name even if you think it's a derogatory name or a slur still in this like yo that's what's up you know what i'm saying we we call ourselves team eat a booty gang you know what i mean i hope that you brothers out there's eating your wife booties i don't know what to tell y'all if you're not i'm not you're not that [ __ ] but you're not married yet you're right you know what i'm saying once you get that ring put that ring you got to get that ring around the ass that's all i'm saying so it's just like yo if you're going to be a bottom feeder be a bottom feeder with your wife and um yeah i ate a lot of ass this weekend bro i'm not gonna lie to you what'd you guys have for dinner friday it was saturday saturday was no but i want to know friday because that's what you're going to taste on saturday no yeah 16-hour digestion cycle so whatever you had friday you were tasting saturday i don't know what it tastes like but i know that it's intoxicating really and um oh yeah you love some ass like i smell it right now everything oh okay remember when they used to call you boonky knows he knows technically aren't you that now since you're you know what else they used to call me dick okay they used to say hey they used to call me broken nose and up again so they would say hey bunky knows show me that snuffle off against dick that's what they used to say to me and i'll be like [ __ ] big bird what's the word god damn the podcast right now shut the [ __ ] off bye everybody [Laughter] listen as always if you listen to this podcast you think we're smart you think we're intelligent you think we're brilliant yeah absolutely right if you listen to this podcast and you think we're just a couple idiots who don't know [ __ ] you're right too mr brilliant in his podcast thank you for listening

Channel: Brilliant Idiots

Views: 182,840

Keywords: andrew schulz, andrew schultz, comedy, comedian, stand up, brilliant idiots, flagrant 2, sports, entertainment, pop culture, commentary, comedy club, near me, jokes, charlamagne, charlemange, breakfast club, interviews, wax, paige, taylor, alexx, alexxmedia

Id: JoDHLaGrMB4

Length: 95min 37sec (5737 seconds)

Published: Thu Aug 13 2020