A Christlike Home (1) Christlike Husbands And Wives by Zac Poonen

okay are these two sessions we're gonna talk about a christ-like home and for a christ-like home we need a christ-like husband christ-like wife christ-like father and christ-like mother who will raise up Christ like children I believe that is God's desire we read that God predestined us to be conformed to the image of Jesus Christ so everything he plans and works is with that goal so you can say that your home is fulfilling God's purpose not if you're earning a big salary or you were able to build your own house or any of those things but only if your home is becoming more christ-like and if it is not I mean if you're serious about your Christian life you should humble yourself and say Lord my home is not fulfilling your purpose and God really blesses those who are honest and acknowledging their need many people do not experience God meeting with them because they don't honestly acknowledge their need the very first marriage in Cana they came to Jesus and said there's no wine the wine is finished we had some when we started but it's all run out maybe you had the wine of happiness and joy and love when you started your married life or when your children were babies and small there's a lot of joy but it's gone and if it's gone the solution is to go to Jesus and say Lord it's gone acknowledge it don't keep pretending that you have plenty of wine don't try to call something which is not wine wine be honest that's the first thing and remember this always that God is on your side against the devil right at the beginning of the Bible we read that it was God who brought Adam and Eve together and established a home that teaches us how interested God is in a home he's the one who established it the very next chapter you see how God the devil came and divided that home separated Adam and Eve he started blaming his wife and from that moment this business of blaming started and you find today homes are full of husbands and wives who blame each other ultimately and in divorce the Bible says God hates divorce Malachi chapter in the last book of the Bible in Malachi God hates it and he's never ever changed his mind on that and Jesus spoke very strongly against divorce and yet divorce is something which has become so accepted among even Christians and believers that shows how Christianity is a million miles away from God to call that Christianity is ridiculous that is not Christianity that's Babylon and the easy way in which a lot of people just go around divorcing I don't like somebody so I divorce its absolute the world is drifted to the place where there's no fear of God and the very next chapter in Genesis that's Genesis 3 how Satan brought a separation being husband and wife in the very next chapter you see wayward children with Cain also the devil got into Cain as soon as he was as soon after he was born maybe it was a sweet little baby when he was born like every baby is but obviously not brought up properly by Adam and Eve grew up proud arrogant like a lot of Christian parents children today and we can blame the children but the Bible says train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it so we see that we're living in a time of tremendous need the world has always been like that but among Christians and in the midst of all this Jesus says you ought to be a light the light of the world your home must be like a light in the midst of darkness sometimes when you're flying in a plane you look down you see all dark at night and here there's a light in one home and there there's a light in another home when you pop move over some deserted areas here and there you see a light I think God looks at the world like that all covered with darkness but here and there alight to home that is seeking to be christ-like so I want to say to you that if you don't have that passion in your heart it'll never take place you must have a passion in your heart to be a light in the world in your relationship as husband and wife not just the areas where other people know but even in private if the devil can still see that you're alight we are very careful that other people should not see our failure what about the devil are you a testimony to Satan husband and wife the way you live together at home the devil and his demons who watch you all the time are you a testimony to them the way you bring up your children that's remember God is on your side that's what I want to say God is on your side against the devil and he is more interested in your building a home a godly home than you are yourself you must believe that to me faith is faith for anything is to believe that this thing that I'm seeking God for God is more interested in me having it then I am interested in getting it whether it's forgiveness of sins baptism in the Holy Spirit bringing up your children in a godly way building a christ-like home to have faith means I believe God is more interested in helping me to build my home in a godly way than I am but God will never do anything if you don't have a burning desire to have such a home and to be a light for the Lord so there are promises in the Bible like if God be for us who can be against us what a wonderful word for husbands and wives even if you have messed up your life so far to believe that God is on your side if God is for you who can be against you that all the demons of Hell try they cannot be again you must have that faith don't ever give up and say oh this hopeless my wife is hopeless my husband is hopeless there are so many people who say that well you keep saying that it's hopeless then it will be hopeless because you don't have faith like the people went to the Canaan's land and six hundred thousand is in sin it's hopeless we can never conquer these giants so you can look at the difficulties you face you can look at the problems your wife is like this your husband is this is hopeless then it will be hopeless but if you can be like Joshua and Caleb no it's not hopeless if God is on my side things are going to change even if my wife is evil or my husband is evil if God is with me God can get a foothold in my home through me one person it's amazing what he can do but I find that so many husband just sit back and say yeah my wife is like that Sheila be like that she'll always be like that because you don't have any faith oh people say my husband is all careless irresponsible he'll always be like that he will always be like that because you don't have any faith for him God is not able to get a foothold in that home because you are full of unbelief you keep saying it's hopeless hopeless hopeless my partner is like this you'll always be like this then they will be like that faith is to believe that God can change things that's what we read in the very first chapter of Genesis he took that rotten world and changed it into something beautiful this is the God we worship and if that's the God you worship I believe that I don't believe there's any situation that God cannot redeem and save us from no matter how spoiled the situation is or a person is or how wicked your partner is or how bad your children have become God can redeem it you must also believe a promised God says those who honor me I will honor first promises Romans 8:31 if God be for us who can be against us 1 Samuel 2 verse 30 says those who honor me I will honor think of saying Lord I want to honor you in my home never mind if nobody else is honoring you but I'm you got a foothold in my home through me one person and if do people imagine wonderful it's even better we want to honor you and as we honor you we believe according to this promise you will honor us definitely those who honor me I will honor take another promise 1 Corinthians 10 and verse 13 God will never allow you to be tested beyond your ability but will with every trial make a way to come out of it to escape you know that married life brings many trials you believe that every one of them is a trial you can conquer and overcome God will make a way of escape or are you so full of unbelief and say oh it's hopeless that's the reason why many things don't haven't changed so far as long as God is not even able to get one foothold in one person in the home there'll be no change he's gotta get at least one person on his side and one is enough that all the others in your home be against God it doesn't matter if God can get one person totally surrendered to him it's amazing what he can do so Christ is our example we want to look at husbands and wives in this session and then parents and children in the next session so a husband is called to look at Jesus and to be like him to be he's our example you know the Bible says in Ephesians in chapter five and verse stop going to talk about the home relationship when he introduces the subject of home relationship with this verse the home relationship section begins in chapter five verse 22 and goes all the way up to chapter 6 verse 9 wives husbands children parents servants masters that also there can be in a home all the way up to chapter 6 verse 9 and the whole section begins with an introduction in chapter 5 verse 18 what is the most important requirement to build a godly home be filled with the holy spirit to be filled with the holy spirit is not a speak in tongues it's to build a Christian home remember this is the introduction to building a Christian home be filled with the Holy Spirit and when you're filled with the spirit words will come out of your mouth words of singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord always giving thanks for everything this is what happens imagine if you in your home there's a song in your heart giving thanks on your lips because you're filled with the Holy Spirit can you imagine how it will change the whole atmosphere of your home it's so different to the average home in the world where there's grumbling and complaining and murmuring all the time about something or the other and then the children pick it up from the parents and they become like that but think of you're filled with the Holy Spirit and instead of all that there is singing praise to the Lord and Thanksgiving a spirit of Thanksgiving even if you're not always thanking with your heart it says not always with your lips you know it says in verse 19 with your heart you may not it doesn't mean we're saying anything we can always be giving thanks and singing in our heart even if we don't vocalize it in words and then the next thing is verse 21 the spirit of subjection to one another that means recognizing the boundaries God is drawn around each person God has drawn a boundary around the husband a boundary around the wife a boundary around each child and we respect that boundary we don't tread into that boundary like they say give space to your husband give space to your wife don't tread into her territory and robber of her dignity as an individual don't rob your children of that dignity as human beings that's their boundary that's the meaning of be subject to one another you know even being subject to my children for example as a father I must not humiliate my children in the presence of guests at home by punishing them publicly I must punish them privately that is a way of being subject to my children I can't say I'm the father I can do what I like I'll thrash you in public no be subject to one another that is how the whole theme of the home begins and learn it and all of you are not yet married learn it now be subject to one another God is the only one who's got no boundaries he can do whatever he likes wherever he likes all the rest of us have got boundaries and we should not tread into an the persons boundary your wife has got a boundary you can't do what you like you can't go around humiliating her publicly that's a boundary she's got a dignity as a human being your husband has got a boundary you can't humiliate him publicly etc etc and then goes on to say about let me talk about husband's first husband's love your wives verse 25 as Christ loved the church so the example for husbands is Jesus Christ and it goes on to say further down in that section that it is like Christ is the head of the church further down just as Christ loves the church we are members of his body in the just as Christ also does the church was 29 so we must love your wife verse 28 like his own body that's the meaning of being the head now there are two type the word head can mean many things in the world in English head of a department in a university head of a country the president head of the army the general or head of the body which head do you feel you as a husband are in your home head of an army head of the country it's because that understanding head of the department no head of the body but it's because people have not seen that meaning of head that a lot of husbands act like dictators because they have misunderstood the word head here it says very clearly head of the body so also husbands must love their wife is their own body Christ is the head of the church so then there's a lot of scope there to meditate on what it means to be a head and the body the body is the head is useless without the body some husband's think I'm okay I can do a lot of things I can do even my wife is not there I can cook I can take care of myself you have that attitude you'll never have a Christian home because home is not just a matter of cooking food and producing children it's a lot more than that so being a testimony to the devil about how to people can become one in God's eyes and how they can manifest a love and a concern and a care and a humble relationship with one another which is a testimony to Satan as to what the gospel can do which is never possible before the day of Pentecost that's why you don't read anything about Holmes in the Old Testament home is not important you could have a very bad home like Moses who would fight with his wife and the children are disobedient but he could be the leader but not in the New Testament the New Testament says if your home is not right you cannot have a responsibility in the church completely out of the question if your children are wayward you cannot have a responsibility in the church that's so clear so the New Covenant brings us into a new possibility of relationship with one another in the home so we must remember that that we can now build a home where the relationship between husband and wife is like the head cares for the body the body the head is useless without a body think of your head was cut off can't just float around by yourself the first question I need to ask how that I want to ask husband's here is do you see the necessity of your wife as much as you see the necessity of your body or is it only for the purposes of sex cooking the food washing the clothes well if that's the case no wonder your marriage isn't such a mess think of how you care for your body how we care for it we wash it there's an injury we treated me the human of a mosquito sits on it we drive it off imagine coming to that level of sensitivity towards the needs of your wife that is what it means to be a christ-like husband sensitive to the needs of the body what an example and let me so turn you to look at John chapter 10 Jesus said in verse 11 sorry John chapter 10 I am The Good Shepherd that's what he says in verse 11 I'm the Good Shepherd he's a shepherd of the sheep and as a shepherd it says in verse he calls his sheep by name and leads them out when he puts forth his own he goes ahead of them I like that he calls his sheep tenderly in Kerala I probably is there in other parts of the country too hmm there's a very rude way in which even Christian husbands called their wives they call her Eddie said he means hey you like you call a pig or something or a dog and I have in all of our churches there I preached against it never call your wife Eddie or even your children call them by tender names he calls his sheep by name I remember after I said that one man came to me and said brother it's out of love that I call my wife Eddie I said why don't you let your wife also love you and call you Allah oh no no no then he got light we are so blind such rude words to say hey you he calls his sheep by knee he's a shepherd respect your wife and he when he puts forth his own he goes ahead of them first for a shepherd is one who goes ahead he doesn't tell his sheep hey go there he goes in front he takes the risks he's willing to face the dangers first [Music] not in the way you see a lot of Indian husbands and wives walking weather why husband is piped in front and the in the villages either woman carrying a load on the head not that type of going ahead it's going ahead as an example if you find your wife is not up to the mark in some area maybe she loses her temper frequently or grumbles and complains how to deliver her from it are you going to whip her from the back that is a hireling come on get rid of that habit a Good Shepherd goes in front and shows by his example how to overcome those sins that you see in your wife it's a tremendous responsibility to be a husband don't ever take it on unless you're serious about it I mean it's just like a tremendous responsibility to be a general of an army or the prime minister of a country you're not your own boss if you you can't take those responsibilities lightly I mean even to be a teacher in a school or a principal of a school is a big responsibility or even some of the jobs you're taking it's a big responsibility it's a very big responsibility to be a husband in a home to be an example a hardworking person I mean if you're a lazy person I would suggest you don't get married just destroy yourself with your laziness but that's not a good example imagine if you're a lazy person and your wife is also lazy and your children are lazy what's your home going to be like you say brother that's my temper and what go and hang your head in shame before God and say Lord I got to be changed some of you have been in the church for so many years when are you going to get rid of your laziness when are you going to be a hard-working person to be an example don't you see Jesus working hard how hard he works there's no laziness in God's kingdom so good Shepard is one who works hard for his sheep because she goes astray looks for that cheap to bring it back he goes ahead he never goes from behind to push saying you must be like this in you must be like that it's a pathetic thing I see today in many Indian men who want to go abroad to make money they don't have qualifications so they marry a nurse because they know that nurses can get jobs in the Gulf and in America and then go care of their wives and sit at home looking after the children and cooking the food while the wife is earning the money are these Christians they have no understanding of God's Word they should hang their heads in shame it's not necessary to go to America and the Gulf it's not necessary to earn so much money it's necessary to build a godly home very very important it recognize that and yet there are so many Christians who don't have any clue about all these things and the end result is these effeminate husbands who are more like women than men they the children suffer because of that you are an effeminate irresponsible lazy husband I guarantee your children are going to suffer all their life because of what they see in you you better wake up I'm speaking strongly because I've seen enough children messed up because the way they fought they saw their father live at home irresponsible lazy wayward I want to save the next generation from messing up so it's time to wake up in this area follow the example of Jesus go ahead and be an example in every area so that you should be able to say to your wife follow me that's what and it says here they the sheep hear his voice I like that let your wife hear your voice don't be one of those silent husbands that's not God's will God wants husband and wife to talk together and share their heart with each other it's not God's will that you should just how how do you talk to your good friends let me ask you how do you talk to your good friends don't you talk and talk about you you you suddenly forget all about your quiet temperament when you're talking to your friends why don't you talk to your wife like that your wife should be your best friend if somebody else you who's your best friend your answer should be my wife that is imagine if Jesus never spoke to you if Jesus treated you like the way you treat your wife hardly ever talk to her I'd feel miserable if the Lord never spoke to me so I see so many areas where I can see Jesus as my example Jesus protects me from danger and that's a responsibility for husband to see possible dangers in the home that's what it means to be christ-like to recognize I want to protect my home from these dangers music and movies and other things that can ruin my home and ruin my children it's the husband who must take that responsibility even before the children come to keep the home from danger husband is the one who the Shepherd is the one who leads the Sheep to green pastures to provide food the husband is the one who's got to take the responsibility I've got to earn food for my family do you take that responsibility seriously you work hard you say lord help me do you think God won't help you he will help you if you take it seriously but if you just play the fool in that area then God sees that you're not serious about your life there's a tremendous need for repentance on the part of husbands I find so many of them take things so casually as if this is not such a serious thing at all so remember take the example of a shepherd it not only provides good pastures for the Sheep it says in verse 11 I lay down my life for the Sheep imagine working so hard that you're willing to lay down your life this is what it means to be christ-like a christ-like leader Jesus gave a demonstration of it by washing the feet of the disciples willing to do any dirty job for your wife or for the home I pray that God will raise up many husbands like this in our church this is God's will so those just a few things you can think about it further and then I want to move on to the wife the wife also has to be christ-like because the Bible says to the wife or to the woman in 1 Corinthians 11 in patience 5 we are told the wife is to be like the church subject to Christ but sometimes the church you look around is not a very good example of submitting to Christ you know that so I want to give you a better example Christ himself and that's in 1 Corinthians 11 and verse 3 I want you all to understand that Christ is the head of every man and the man is the head of the woman in other words again the same picture the husband is the head of the wife and God is the head of Christ so now get this picture in the same way that Christ is subject to God the Father the wife is to be subject to man her husband like Christ accepted God the Father as his head the woman has to accept her husband as her head so who is their example in this passage not the church Jesus Christ and that's a perfect example so just like Christ is the example for husbands we find Christ as the example for wives - in the way Jesus submitted because the father told him to do you know this word submission unfortunately in the eyes of many people is a dirty word and with the women's liberation movement which has affected so many people around the world and is affected a lot of people in Western countries and has gradually affected westernized parts of India you know this removing removing of the veil from over the woman's head started with the women's liberation movement a hundred years ago even in America and all churches women covered their heads but with the women's liberation movement fifty years ago women took off their veils they were honest when they took off their veil saying I'm not in subjection to any man or to my husband but remember that it's a sign of a rebellious spirit when a woman takes off that bailing which God is said in the same chapter in 1 Corinthians 11 it says further down a woman ought to have verse 10 a symbol of authority on her head because of the angels it's in the context of a woman being subject to a man so I'm just telling you how you got to be careful of that spirit that there is in the world that's come over to India from the Western world you see it in all these charismatic churches where no woman ever believes unveiling your head it's it's that spirit that's come over from the Western world and it's the spirit of Satan of a satanic rebellious I will not accept God's order that the man has to be the head of the one who said that I'm equal to the man ok let me see what I have a home you built sister and let me see give me 20 years and I'd like to see what your children are going to be like I prophesy they'll bring dishonor to you and be a headache to you because you can't violate God's Word and expect godliness God to bless your home completely out of the question so what I'm saying is the important thing is not the veiling of the head you can wail your head and not be subject to your husband at home that's worse it's that spirit behind it which says who said he's my head imagine if Jesus lived on earth and said who said the father's my head I'm equal to him was Jesus equal to the father or not yes or no yes all of you say yes and that's right Jesus was equal to the father and do you know in God's eyes a man and woman are equal absolutely equal the one man is not superior before God over the woman the man is not some special favorite of God no men and women are equal before God but yet the woman has to be in subject why'd Jesus Christ was equal to the Father and yet for the purpose of redemption he subjected himself to the Father and demonstrated in a world which believed that submission was a dirty word he demonstrated that submission can be a glorious thing a man can demonstrate that by his total submission to Christ and a wife can stem instal submission to her husband so both have the privilege I have the privilege of demonstrating the glory of submission by my total submission to Christ that means as soon as the Lord tells me something going to apologize to your wife I'll do it immediately that's the glory of submission you think a man doesn't have to submit of course he has to Christ and the woman has the opportunity to demonstrate that spirit of submission in our home now a woman may say but my husband doesn't know the Lord like I do maybe you're right there are many cases where a husband is thoroughly disobedient to the word maybe an unconverted what should a Christian woman do in such a case there is an answer because this is not new to the 21st century even in the first century 1 Peter chapter 3 and verse 1 1 Peter 3 verse 1 in the same way you wives be submissive to your own husbands even to those who are disobedient to the Word of God unconverted so that you can win them without speaking one word by your behavior what does it mean in the same way why does the sentence start with in the same way because it's referring to the previous paragraph Christ is your example 1 Peter 2:21 in the same way wives in which way in the way your great example Jesus again here you see that Jesus is the example for wives where you have been called 1 Peter 2:21 Christ suffered are you suffering sister because your husband is disobedient to God's Word you have an example Christ suffered leaving you an example to follow in his steps in the same way wives be submissive even though he committed no sin maybe your life is godly sister he was reviled verse 23 are you being reviled by your husband he did not revile in return in the same way wives submit to your husbands while he was suffering he did not utter any threat he could have said wait till God judges you you fellows did he say that you're a godly sister and your wife you're suffering under your husband do you say way to God judges you you're not following Jesus he kept entrusting himself to him who judges righteously in the same way wives entrust yourself to one who has promised he will never allow you to be tested beyond your ability never when he is getting too much for you he'll do something either soften your husband's heart or convert him or kill him but he'll never allow you to be tested beyond your ability that you can be sure of you have God on your side your husband's unconverted he's with the devil so what you've got God on your side who is stronger behaved like Jesus Christ behaved like Jesus Christ in the same way and you can win them isn't it your aim to win this unconverted husband win him without speaking one word don't preach to him I'm sorry to say I have met some sisters were converted and whose husbands are not converted we had some of them in CFC around here now and when I saw the spirit in these women in those wives I could I understood why our husbands are not converted their preaches they must be going home and preaching to their husband and the persons are sick and tired of their preaching have they understood how to win their husbands without a word now and I said your husband's will never get converted not if they see your life and then I've seen other examples of why husbands who would not allow their wives to come to the church and the wives by spirit of submission won their husbands over even non-christian as by spirit of submission so we have had good examples and bad examples that you've seen but it's winning them without a word what a wonderful example to be you know like Jesus again you can say but my husband doesn't know as much as I do of the word well Jesus could have lived in Nazareth and said Joseph and Mary don't know as much as I know about God and I know about his word and they he was absolutely right and he saw Joseph and Mary sinning and he had never sinned and yet the Bible says till the age of 30 he's submitted Jesus is your example can you submit to somebody who is unconverted somebody who doesn't know the word well look at Jesus he submitted to Joseph and Mary you see I'm getting tired of it well he didn't get tired after 30 years and after 30 years of submitting to imperfect Joseph and Mary you know what God said about Jesus at his baptism this is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased do you want to hear those words this is my beloved daughter when whom I'm well pleased do you think Jesus never suffered anything in those thirty years how many times in those thirty years he had to deny himself to do what Joseph and Mary told him to do when he has a little boy probably didn't want to do that but he said no I will please my father so the reason you submit to your husband is because God has said it when you see it like that it takes on a different colour not because your husband says you submit to me no God has said it be like Jesus Christ I've said this that if the Bible had said husband submit to your wives I would be the first person to do it I go to my wife and say well darling what do you want me to do now I'll do it tell me I'm your servant because God has said husband submit to your wives it's not because she says not because your husband says it because God says submit to your husbands when you see does God's command it takes on a different colour so the other thing I want to say is you know when God made Eve isn't it interesting that he took a bone out of Adam's body so that Adam would always remember hey she came out of me she's part of my body you know even a child born to a mother was not is not born like that it's not from the bone of a mother the child is born in a separate sack inside the mother's womb with just a little cord connecting it to the mother that's all even though the child is born out of a mother's womb it's not connected in the way that Adam's rib that's why a wife is supposed to be closer even than a child that's why a husband should love his wife even more than his children always always it's an unfortunately a bad habit that we have in our Indian culture which many Christians in India also followed that they love their children more than they love their wives I never want to love my children more than I love my wife I never want to love my wife more than I love Jesus Christ there's an order in my life Jesus Christ my wife my children and is it like that in your life can you honestly say all of you husbands and wives that you love each other more than you love your children I hope you can say that before God because if you can't say that you love your children more than you love each other you're not going to have a Christian home you might as well forget it just build one of those worldly homes like there are thousands and millions of them in the world you just make another one but if you really want to build a godly home you better follow godly principles that your wife is part of your body he doesn't say anywhere that your children are part of your body so there is an order the Lord first in your partner necks and then the children all your life don't follow the Indian culture where children mean more than marriage partner you examine your heart the attitude even when the children are small see whether you love your partner more than you love your children you may find you may discover that you don't love your partner do you love your children more that's what leads to divorce so often and so that's something we got to keep in mind but further in the way the Lord did it was he said it's not good for man to be alone you know Genesis chapter 2 in verse 18 and that's something you must remember it is not God's will for a man or a woman to be alone to be lonely and yet in many homes we're husband and wife live together they are lonely two lonely individuals who hardly speak to each other except when they have a fight and then they talk a lot and is that the Christian home that's a godless home it's a shame to call that a Christian home you can live together in the same home and say well we're not divorced but you're lonely it's not good for a man to be alone it's not good woman to be alone God wants them to have fellowship just like head and body really close and then the Lord says I will make him a helper Genesis 2:18 the same word that Jesus used to refer to the Holy Spirit is Jesus was there you know he was part of the Trinity there when he made he Father Son and Holy Spirit Jesus was the his name was not Jesus then the second person of the Trinity but he was there making Eve for Adam he said this is a helper and the same word when Jesus came to earth and came as Jesus he used the same word in John 14 and says to his disciples I'll pray to the Father and He will send you a helper John 14 and verse 16 a helper so all of you sisters you not only have Jesus as your example you have the Holy Spirit as your example you're a helper like the Holy Spirit's a helper and the one you see the wonderful thing about the Holy Spirit is he does things in a hidden way he doesn't come with great pomp and show great pomp and show is not his way for example when he helps me in the ministry he doesn't make it all obvious that the Holy Spirit is here you think it is me but it's not me I know it's not me it's the Holy Spirit I wouldn't dream of trying to stand up here without the Holy Spirit let me show you a verse isaiah 45 verse 15 as I have 45 verse 15 you are a God who hides himself the Holy Spirit is a God who hides himself he hides himself so much in ministering through me that you think it is all brothers Act it is not brother Jack it's the Holy Spirit and if you remove the Holy Spirit I would have nothing to say here that is how effective he is but he doesn't take any credit for it he just quietly supports from the back inward Lee does everything and it doesn't matter to him that other people think that brother Zack is doing it can you be a wife like that from behind supporting in a hidden way even if you get no credit for it and your husband gets all the credit for it see this is a prayer ministries like this a lot of people pray for me I don't even know who they are but I believe in the day of judgment God's going to call them all up we've got if I get a reward they're going to get a big part of it I know my wife prays for me so a wife can be a tremendous helper hidden not wanting to be prominent the Holy Spirit doesn't want to be prominent are you a wife like that or are you trying to overshadow your husband and your husband looks like a dumb effeminate because overshadowed by this mighty woman I want to tell you that's not Christ like it's not this it's not you're not a helper you're the leader when you say what to do my personality's like I well the Holy Spirit's come to change our personality I'll tell you my personality was very shy you won't believe it but it was true people who knew me when I was 15 years old when I was in school the xiaomi is very shy and timid and when i joined the military academy they laughed at me say you're gonna defend our country we can't believe it they said but see what happened on the Holy Spirit film he changed me completely the Holy Spirit can change your temperament I tell you he can I wanted it I said Lord I'm not naturally bald and type of person who can stand up before people I'm timid and shy and afraid to stand before people the Holy Spirit change my temper he can change your temperament if you're the arrogant bald type of woman over shouting your husband the Holy Spirit can change your temperament and make you a wonderful wife who's a support for your husband even though you know more of the Scriptures you know when you read of Aquila and Priscilla I don't have time to show it to you in structure but in Akula and priscilla very often it comes priscilla and aquila what does that mean I personally think it means priscilla was the most spiritual one if you look up the number of times the this couple come in the New Testament I'd checked it on months many times it says Priscilla and Aquila that means your wife's name comes first and but she never did anything without her husband that's a wonderful thing even when they have she felt that hey this Apollo's is going astray you read about it in Acts chapter 18 they called him home and sat together with her husband she knew more of the scriptures that's how he taught now there are two practical things I want to say also in conclusion two of the biggest problems in married life come through relatives and money there are many other areas also but relatives and money are a big problem now the first commandment in the Bible do you know what it is the very first commandment in the whole Bible for man not for Adam for us Genesis 2:24 before sin came into the world the only commandment given in the Bible before sin came into the world Genesis 2:24 a man shall leave his father and his mother and be joined to his wife and they shall be one God's desire is that husband and wife should be one and if that is to happen he must emotionally leave his father and mother that means not let them control his life anymore he doesn't mean he doesn't care for them but now his decisions must be taken not consulting daddy and mummy but consulting his wife that's another thing which most people in India never practice and that non-christian practice has come in to Christians where a man even after he gets married is more attached to his parents than to his wife he cannot have a Christian home because you have disobeyed the first commandment in the Bible you can't do it you have to I don't mean that you don't care for the example as Jesus he was subject to Joseph and Mary for thirty years but when he moved out after his baptism the very next thing you read in John chapter 2 is his telling his mother Mary at the marriage at Cana a woman what have I got to do with you what a word she got the shock of her life in John chapter 2 when he said that hey is this my boy who is obeyed me for thirty years yes because he's moved out of the home it was difficult for him to say that to a mother who suffered so much for him and it's difficult for yous brother to say that to your parents that now my wife comes first but jesus said it he's your example if you want to follow Jesus and if you want to build a godly home and also for the woman in Psalm 45 what is the woman supposed to do Psalm 45 is the bridal Psalm a psalm of the bride and bridegroom Jesus Christ and his bride and again the example of Christ in the church he's talking about the bride and the bridegroom and there it says listen o daughter speaking to the wife in verse 10 Psalm 45 10 listen daughter you're getting married now give attention forget your people and your father house now this is your new house that's why you change your name your last name has changed now your husband's name and that's the one you're going to that's your house now forget that it doesn't mean you don't care for them and that also Jesus has proved that even though he was hanging on the cross he cared for his poor mother sweet in the midst of all that suffering he's I've got to provide a home for my mother that is a good example you don't let your parents interfere in your life you don't let them emotionally control you with their tears or whatever it is and you dis take decisions it is you and your partner but if your parents are in need you care for them provide for them I remember husband runs asking me whether my parents are in need and from my earnings I want to send them my money but my wife doesn't allow me to do it what should I do I said don't let the left hand know what the right hand is doing it's very simple your wife is your left hand don't let her know what the right hand has done that you supported your parents obey Scripture there's an answer in scripture for everything you have to help your parents when they are in need definitely care for them you they need to be cared physically maybe you need to bring them home in your home and look after them do that but make sure it is not their home but your home there's a lot of difference between you living in your parents home and your parents living in your home even though physically it looks the same it's not the same the other area is money the most important thing I would say to all married couples in relation to money is live within your means stay in the circle of finances God has drawn around you if you go outside that and that is by borrowing borrowing is because I don't want to stay within the circle God is drawn around me economically I look at that fellow he's got a bigger circle I want to buy what he has I want to get everything which makes my life more comfortable but if God is not giving you that much money don't borrow don't use a credit card to buy things which you cannot afford that's why I've never had a credit card in my life I've never been in debt in 71 years not a single day it's not that we've not been poor if you knew how much my wife and I earned when we got married I can say honestly we earn much less than any of you sitting here when you were married much much less even allowing for inflation what did we do we never bought new clothes we never bought anything we couldn't afford we never went on holidays we never spent on anything because if there lots of things we couldn't buy we had a little baby we could only buy things we my wife would stitch the clothes for the child we couldn't afford to go to shops and buy because one reason we feared God who said oh no man anything a circle was small it says in Ecclesiastes chapter 10 and verse 8 Ecclesiastes 10 verse 8 the middle of that verse if you break through of that boundary wall a serpent will bite you God has drawn a boundary of finances around you you break through it a serpent bites you and let me tell you something in the Hebrew language in which that is written the word for debt de beatty is the same or very similar to Serpent's bite same word here the Serpent's bite is a debt do you want it do you know the number of people who are in debt every church I go to I say are you in debt we got it cleared as soon as possible I've removed elders from being elders if they remained in debt and didn't seem to clear it people have come here with debt and I said come sit with me tell me how you're spending your money every month and I say knock off this knock off this you don't need this you don't need this you don't need this and you can live within your income and you know I've taught them how to live it then come and they're prospered after that and become very rich so many people have come you're riddled with debt and they got Freed's not I never gave them any money we don't get money from the church but we teach them to see God's kingdom first and teach them to live within their income and not only when we were married after we started living here even in the days when the church started my wife and had very little money when we couldn't afford to buy rice in the open market my wife and I would stand one hour in the ration shop queue and there were other believers who walked by and smirked and smiled at us look at this guy servant of the Lord standing in the ration shop queue we used to stand in the ration shop queue to buy kerosene because gas was too expensive for us and I know some people who come to our house yet who laughs at us we'd go and buy the cheapest possible beef from the cheapest possible place people laughed at us but the people who laugh at us are the people who got into debt and they suffer I never got him to death he doesn't matter if you eat simple food I'll tell you that we never got sick but all these people we used to buy fish maybe once a year or twice a year we couldn't afford it boy we're healthy and strong our children are healthy and strong only for one reason not because we don't love fish it's because we refuse to get into debt we never bought new clothes for our children on their birthdays because we wouldn't get into debt we couldn't afford it when that chil clothes wore out then we would get new ones even their school uniforms we pass it on from one to the other there are many ways in which we can stay out of debt if you want to but if you want to be tipped up and stand up to the latest style and buy unnecessary things then you the serpent will bite you and it'll be very difficult to get out of the Serpent's bite once he's got you so be careful in the area of money I say this from my experience I wondered in those days why God was taking us through all this now I see the Lord says because I want you to make you an example to other people so that you can tell them that even when you had little or nothing you did not borrow dear brothers and sisters be careful in the area of money so many people there's no need to buy so many clothes you don't need a sari every year I never did that for my wife it's a waste of money when we have enough clothes why should we keep on buying clothes living slips simply now God expands your boundary then buy other things we bought a washing machine when we could afford it not when we couldn't afford it we could live without a washing machine people man is lived without a washing machine for 5000 years how did they do that so what I say is if you follow these simple principles you can have a really godly home and now I want you to sing a song to each other husband and wife okay we're going to sing it to each other and if you're embarrassed to look at each other you don't have to look at each other but mean it to each other mean it to each other will you let me be your servant let me be as Christ to you pray that I might have the grace to let you be my servant too don't be so proud to say hey I'm going to serve you I'm not going to let you serve me let the other partners serve you too we start with the first words when you let me be your will you let me be your servant let me be as Christ to you [Music] pray that I might have the grace to let you be my servant to we are pilgrims on a journey we you're travelers on the roll we are here to help you John the Milan bear the loan I will hold the Christ's light for you in the night time of your fear I will hold my hand out to you speak the piece you long to hear I will weep when you are we when you love I love with you I will share your joy and song we have seen this journey through when we sing to God in hand we shall find such harmony or not all we have known to get oh Christ love and agony will you let me be your sir [Music] PS Christ to you [Music] I may be you be my servant you can get a copy of that in a card if you haven't already got it let's pray Heavenly Father we know you have a tremendous desire that there should be godly homes all across this land of India and here in Bangalore many many lights in the darkness and Lord these wonderful families that are here who sat here eagerly listening to the word I believe with all my heart that most of them if not all of them desire to have a godly home help them to be willing to pay the price that each of us will be we'll have a godly home we pray in Jesus name Amen

Channel: SermonIndex.net

Views: 39,765

Rating: 4.818182 out of 5

Keywords: Zac, Poonen, Revival, Repent, God, Sermons, Jesus, SermonIndex

Id: XM7fUtXVfE0

Length: 64min 20sec (3860 seconds)

Published: Tue May 17 2011