Nine Positive Autistic traits. Nine Traits of autism that
you may not already know. Autistic people tend to break all the stereotypes, but there are some traits that
almost all of us have in common. Some may be familiar to you,
others may surprise you. Just wait till we get to number seven and eight. Welcome to today's Patron's Choice
video from Asperger's from the Inside. You're here with Paul and I make weekly
videos sharing the human side of autism, so make sure you hit Subscribe
to get the latest content. So ever since discovering I was on the
spectrum a couple of years ago, I've met lots and lots of other autistic people. And what I've noticed is that there are some
traits that almost all of us have in common. So I really don't like to exaggerate, but it's
no exaggeration to say that most, if not all, autistic people I've ever met have most, if not
all, of the traits we're about to talk about. So exactly how these traits are expressed
are uniquely different for every person, and that's part of what makes the
beautiful diversity of our community. But there are some strengths
that a lot of us have. So this video is based on strength and positives. There are also downsides to being autistic, as you may know, but this video
really focuses on those positives. Okay, trait number one, attention to detail. This is probably the autistic trait that
is most well known, most well understood. There are billion dollar companies around
the world trying to leverage the strengths of autistic people in the workplace by looking
for those unique individuals that have a fantastic attention to detail
and can really bring a lot to the company and see things
that other people don't see. So part of this means that we tend
to have specialised skill sets. So rather than being having our
attention everywhere and being able to do everything equally, we
tend to focus on one or 2 things. Sometimes they're called special interests, and our attention to detail in those areas means
that we have specialised skills in those areas. This does not mean we all fall
into the autistic savant category. Most of us are nowhere near that. We
have the entire range of intelligence. Some of us are above average. Some of us are below average. Some of us have incredible memory. Some of us have incredible memory for some things,
and incredibly poor memory for other things. So our special skills range across the whole
spectrum of all of the traits of humanity. But we do often focus our attention on the
detail missing the rest of the picture. So this brings us to the second positive
autistic trait, which is being persistent. And this relates to hyper focus and sticking on one thing and not being very good
at letting it go and moving on to the next thing. So I know for myself it takes a lot of energy to change gears from doing one
thing to doing the next thing. So that means that once I get into
the groove of doing one thing, letting it go, putting it down
becomes really, really difficult. So this links back into the
attention to detail that if I'm focused on one thing, I might be called
stubborn, I might be called rigid. People might say that my interests are
very narrow and I'm not willing to look outside that. This often looks like being very
passionate and having extremely high standards. So I know for myself before I can feel
confident with something I need to have about a 99% confidence level before I think
that I know something and what I've noticed that the neurotypicals around me, if they're about
60 to 70% sure, then they go with that decision. Whereas I feel like I need to keep looking,
keep asking the question, and be very, very, very sure before I'm happy to say, yep, that's
done and actually move on to the next step. This might have something to do with having a
lifetime of rejection and having the internal message that, well, maybe if I succeed then finally, people might accept me. So the next positive autistic trait is
being creative, thinking outside the box, ignoring social expectations, being
innovative, creating new things. And this could be in any area of
life, it might be art or music or dancing or writing or philosophy, you name it. I guarantee you can find an autistic
person who's creative in that area. So this is really fantastic
from a work perspective. When you couple this with our attention to
detail, we can think outside the box from a fresh perspective and bring something to
a team that would otherwise not be there. And this is one of the reasons that
there are so many really big companies looking explicitly for autistic
people to join their teams. The next trait is being honest, straightforward, direct, requiring - and giving -
really, really clear communication. So some people say that the reason they do
this is that it's just way too hard to lie. The kind of social skills that you need to
try and figure that out is really difficult. So we don't like unspoken things. It's so much simpler if we just speak something
out loud and then everyone is on the same page. So again, in a work situation, this can
be really beneficial for the whole team, because instead of making assumptions, I
would much rather see those things written out and check my assumptions to make
sure that everyone is on the same page. And we have extremely clear communication
between all of the team members. So this often takes more time because we
need to go back and check our understanding. But it leads to a culture of transparency where everyone can be genuine
and actually say what they mean rather than saying what they think is socially
appropriate or acceptable in the situation. So that means that we'll often put a hand
up and say "something's not right here" and this, again, can be a real asset to a Corporation where you need people
to actually say what they think. And I think one of the reasons for this that
I've observed is that autistic people tend to have this need to be really genuine
and authentic to themselves, which means that rather than just
following along with other people and doing what is socially expected, we tend
to be more comfortable going out on our own. And this goes back to the creativity point. I would much rather create something
entirely new and do it by myself than just go along with what is already happening
and say and do what everyone around me is doing. So that makes it easier for me to
say what I think because I'm less concerned about saying the right thing or
saying the same thing as everyone else. And as you may also see, sometimes
this means that I might come across as blunt or possibly socially inappropriate
because I actually named the elephant in the room that everyone else knew
wasn't supposed to be talked about. Trait number five is being non-judgmental, and
what this looks like is just having no clue that one thing is supposed to
be good or supposed to be bad. I just look at things and think that's a thing. I remember I was on a business trip
to camera speaking to all of the ministers and senators about autism advocacy,
and we were sitting in the canteen and there were a couple of women who were dressed
as if they were going to the horse races. So I don't know if this is across every
culture, but especially Melbourne in Australia, people, especially women, really dress
up and go and watch horse racing. So this is really elaborate, colorful
costumes, big hats and feathers and things. When I saw these two, I didn't really think anything of it
because it didn't mean anything to me. It wasn't even out of place. It took one of my neurotypical colleagues
to say, "Oh, that's a bit weird I wonder what they're doing". Whereas for me I was so out of place, everything didn't make sense that I
didn't even question what was going on. It was just fine. It was just a thing. Why would I judge it as good or
bad, or even notice that it was different? So how this plays out is a lot of
us tend to be radically accepting of diversity, especially within the autism community,
because we're all so different from each other. The only way we can coexist is to
be radically accepting of diversity, especially within our own community. The other thing this means is that I often
forget to respect hierarchical power structures, which means that I will talk to a
CEO the same as I might talk to the person, you know, begging for money on the street. And I forget that I'm supposed to treat these
two people differently, because in my mind, aren't we all just human anyway, so that
it can be a real strength, and it can also come across as a little bit weird
and sometimes socially inappropriate. In some situation, the next trait is being loyal. It's hard to make friends,
it's hard to find friends. It's hard to build the kind of relationship
that is actually worthwhile having. So a lot of autistic people
prefer to spend time alone, and sometimes that's because finding other
people to spend time with who actually, like doing the same thing, or it's a genuinely
positive experience can be quite difficult. So when you find a person or an
organisation or your employer or someone that treats you really well and it's
a really good relationship, we can work really, really hard to keep that because it's so
hard to find another solution that fits. Unfortunately, intense loyalty also
means that we might not be so good at ending relationships that we probably should. So that could mean going along with
a dysfunctional relationship or staying in a situation longer than we should, because someone else would have just left
because we're not being treated properly. So trait number seven is being highly empathic. Now you might think, Wait, what
aren't autistic people supposed to lack empathy? Isn't that what everyone
says? Actually, we know that that's a myth. There was an online survey run by Chris Bonello
from Autistic Not Weird not that long ago, and he actually found that a lot of people
say that they feel like they have too much empathy, and that is actually a problem
compared to not having enough empathy. So another way to think about
this is that we can be really sensitive to some things, and this
makes sense when you think about it through the frame of attention to
detail, we notice small things we can get affected by small things. One of the reasons that people think we
lack empathy is something called the double empathy problem, that it's hard to relate to
someone who's very, very different to you. But on the other hand, think
about someone like Temple Grandin. So she had this amazing ability to
understand and connect with cows that the neurotypicals around her just
couldn't really understand. But at the same time, if you're relating to
cows as much as you are relating to humans, then that probably says that you're not really as
close to your fellow human beings as you could be. In fact, this was why sometimes, Asperger's
is called Wrong Planet Syndrome, because some people literally asked the question, Am I the same
species as the people around me? Or was I somehow accidentally dropped here by aliens? And now I
have to learn how to get along with the natives. So the other interesting thing that
happens when you're really empathic is that you see the real
person that is talking to you. So if you're talking to me and you're sad, but you're pretending to be happy because
that's the socially appropriate thing to do. Then I will respond to you as if you're sad,
and that makes people feel really uncomfortable sometimes. I was supposed to know that
if you're pretending to be happy, I should treat you as if you're happy
and pretend I can't see the sad. So it took me a long time to learn that
just because someone is actually sad, if they're saying they're happy,
I need to pretend they're happy. And that just blew my mind. But unfortunately, these kinds of complicated
social dynamics lead a lot of autistic people to feel like we don't understand other people's
emotions because I thought you were sad but you're telling me that you're
happy and there's no congruence there. Actually, you're probably right. There is often no congruence between a
person's actual state and their actual actions. But this is just a really complicated
social thing that we need to learn. So number eight is that I have found that,
ironically, autistic people tend to be extremely flexible which, again, this goes
completely against the common wisdom that we're supposed to be rigid and not
liking change and all of these things. But again, if you think about
it, if we think outside the box, find creative solutions, ignore the social
norms around us, then anything is possible. I'm not going to do something
because I'm supposed to I can do absolutely anything. So when especially when you combine this
with difficulty judging whether something is a good idea or a bad idea, it's just
an idea, and I'm happy to think about it. This means that we need structure
and stability and routine and order and all of these things so
that we can actually function in life. Otherwise anything is possible. And I have no idea where to start. So another positive that comes
out of flexibility is that it means a lot of us have learned a
very systematic approach to life. So that means that I will get all the information and put it through my system
and come up with an answer. And this has great benefit for problem
solving and rational thinking and structure and organising things. And it actually comes from that need
for structure because I'm so flexible that I need to make a structure
for myself so that I can function. So number nine is having a
very strong sense of Justice. Now, this might come from a
lifetime of being treated unfairly. Who knows? But I find that a lot of us
really get stuck on rules and fairness. Perhaps if you're a parent, you may
have come across this phenomenon. For me personally, it's really hard to let
things go when I know they could be better. So a personal value of mine
is continual improvement. This goes hand in hand with seeing society and
seeing how people work together and thinking that is not okay in the future. We need to keep doing better. So the answer of 2it's just
because that's how we do it", "Because I said so" All of those kind of answers just
are not a good enough reason. I need to know that there's a process and a fairness and a justice to what we're
doing and that we're getting better at doing that. So I guess the message with that
is, do not underestimate us. The autistic people I know are some of the
most hardworking, persistent, determined people that I know, which means that we will keep
going and keep trying until things get better. And now for the most important lesson -
we've seen nine strengths, nine positive traits. It's important to realise that every strength
is in itself a weakness and vice versa. So the question then becomes, Which one do
you see? Do you see the strength or do you see the corresponding weakness? Let's take
the positive traits we've just heard about. Attention to detail means that
I miss the bigger picture. Persistence equals stubbornness. Being creative means that I don't conform. Being honest and direct means
that I can be blunt and tactless. Being non-judgemental means that I can
have really poor social judgement. Being loyal means that I might not be
able to manage relationships properly and I'll cling to a relationship that's not
working instead of figuring out how to fix it. Being empathic also means
that I'm highly sensitive, being flexible means that I need
a lot of structure and stability and having a really strong sense of
justice means that I often rock the boat and not everyone likes that. So as you can see, black and white
both occur in the same picture. And the real question is, Which one are you going
to focus on? So we might leave it there for today. Thanks to our Patreon Community
for voting for this topic. If you'd like to have your say in
next month's Patron's Choice video, you can become a Cup of coffee supporter of
this channel for less than a dollar a week. So thanks for watching. Make sure you leave a comment telling
us what your favourite autistic trait is, and we'll see you again next week. Bye.
