*2 HOURS* OF SML MARATHON! (FUNNIEST JEFFY VIDEOS)

I get to take my welld deserved break hey shf peipi what do you want junior I'm trying to take my 30second break well instead of taking a 30second break how about you take an hour break and take me and my friends to the park the park ew that's gross why would I take you guys to the park because you love us and the park is fun it's outside there so much fun stuff to do no I really don't love you guys and the park is just uh it has a bunch of mosquitoes and stuff well no it's really fun outside we haven't played outside ever we're yeah don't be such a dweeb I don't want to take you guys but I kind of got some dishes over there I don't want to watch the dishes I'll just take you guys to the park really yeah don't get too excited though you guys stay on the playground I'm only going for fresh air cuz this place gets depressing okay thank you Chef let's go guys whatever oh my God where the park Chef B oh I know I drove you here okay just just go and do your thing play on the playground or whatever I'm going sit on the bench I only came for the fresh air all right let's go guys wa Joseph look how big this rock wall is I know it's huge I bet I beat you to the top no I can beat you to the top no you can't oh man I fell you're cheating you're cheating no I'm not I made it to the top everybody hey yo Patrick you're here yeah my mom dropped me off a couple of days ago I don't know what happened it's so crazy oh well I didn't know you came and played at this part you're missing a shoe yeah some dog took it it was really crazy oh wow Joseph I made it to the top I made it to the top Joseph no no no you cheated Junior how did I cheat cuz you're slow and you're a turtle no you pushed me down how did I push you down I didn't push you down you just tripped okay how about you raise me down this ladder then but but that's really curvy are you scared no I'm not scared oh my God my leg I think I broke my leg jeffp oh my God I can't believe you had the playround you break your leg I fell off this to the playground D let's just go to the doctor come on come on come on my leg hurts so bad yeah that's probably cuz you broke it you see this x-ray right here you snapped it clean in half I broke my leg Yeah that's why it's in a cast stupid you shouldn't have jumped off that stupid playground Junior I didn't jump off I fell off whatever now that my leg's broken what does that mean mister well it means you probably shouldn't walk or run or really do anything other than lay in bed for I'd say probably about 3 weeks 3 weeks but soccer practice is tomorrow I want to play soccer soccer you never wanted to play soccer do you with the is wrong with you where do you come up with this stuff yeah we don't have a soccer team near us well I'd say don't like do anything really just stay here and watch TV so what does that mean like he has to just stay in the bed now yeah for for a little while I'd say uh maybe just get him whatever he needs you know till he can help himself oh he already has that life all I have to do is lay in this bed what if I want to go play with my friends no you you definitely shouldn't go do that you're not going to be able to play with them you have a broken leg Junior h hey it's not all bad you know people are going to feel bad for you probably probably give you something you know they'll probably sign your cast give me stuff yeah I mean I wouldn't milk it or anything I mean don't be a dick but yeah milking it yeah hey Junior oh hey guys how's your leg yeah that was a pretty bad fault Junior you okay well I broke my leg see wo that that must have hurt Junior yeah it's still hurting pretty bad what are y'all doing here oh we brought you flowers yeah hope it makes you feel better flowers yeah yeah that's gay wow what what are these flowers supposed to do it's supposed to make me feel better oh I see flowers my legs back together it's not broken Junior don't be a dick man we're just we're just trying to help how are flowers going to make me feel better my leg is snapped in two I mean they smell nice yeah well what would make you feel better do you me yeah what would make you feel better what would make me feel better um H oh Joseph huh um you know that basketball goal you took from me uh yeah well um my leg is hurting pretty bad it would make my leg feel a lot better if you gave it back to me what I really like that basketball go why ji my leg really wants it back if you could just put it on the side of my bed so I could you know shoot some hoops because you know I I can't go outside and play so if I could play on my bed that'd be really cool okay I guess so here you go Junior oh now that's more like it where do you want it a little bit more to the left yeah that's that's good right there right there okay now uh where's the basketball dang it I forgot uh here you go all right I'm GNA make a shot with my broken leg all right all right do it Junior you are not Stu give it to me one more time one more time oh it's my broken leg blame it on the leg right this leg totally all right uh so um H what else would make me feel better uh Joseph yeah um can you just get out of here what yeah I I kind of just don't want to see your face right now my leg kind of hurts wow this this harsh what oh forget you then Junior yeah yeah okay now that he's gone Cody yeah oh this leg hurts so bad Cody what can I do to help Junior what what can you do um H well my back is kind of shore uh do you think Ken could give me a back rub uh I'm I'm sorry what can you think Ken could give me a back rub um I I don't know if I'd be comfortable with that Junior that's well my leg hurts really bad I think I think I think my leg would feel better if Ken would give me a back rub it has to be Ken though um oh yeah Ken that back R feels so good it doesn't mean anything right Ken oh it better mean something cuz he is digging deep into my back a little bit lower Ken he doesn't give me backwards like this oh man that feels so good I'm so relaxed Ken I need to speak with you in the kitchen right now wait wait what what hey bring him back my backround was feeling good now now I'm all alone with these stupid flow stupid flowers ow my leg up ow oh my leg hurt so bad I came as soon as Charlie and friends went off sh told me about your broken leg Yeah Dad I broke my leg at the part oh my precious baby my baby I know you're in so much pain if I was a more attent to Father this would have never happened Dad it's okay it's not your fault I I fell off the jungle oh I wish it wouldn't have never happen just tell me what you want do you need anything anything well do I need anything yeah anything well I'm kind of just name it hold on hold on here here here you go what's that it's a horn just just just hit it and then chapi will come in here and he'll bring you anything you want oh the horn yeah just just ring the horn hit the horn and Sh people bring whatever I want yeah okay thanks Dad I love you no problem just hope you feel better son a horn whoa sh baby can can I I I just really did not appreciate the way you were putting your hands on Junior and I need you to tell me that it didn't mean anything to you okay really you really mean it come here you big hunk of man what the hell is wrong with you go uh nothing so damn weird what's that noise Junior Che baby what is that noise Junior it's a horn what are you doing with a horn my dad gave it to me he said if I ever need anything just honk the horn and you'll come you couldn't just say my name you had to honk a horn well I mean if I say your name you might not hear me so the Horn's loud see oh I I wouldn't hear you call my name I hear you yell my name every day oh well so what did you want anyway nothing I just I just wanted to see if the horn would work really yeah are you serious yeah I didn't you just wanted to see if the horn would work yeah it well it works oh God wait where's Thomas th shabibi I was 2 fet away why could you just say shabibi well you might not have heard me I need Thomas you need Thomas yeah I need Thomas you make my leg feel better oh my God I'm not even gonna ask you I'm not even going to ask you you know what here's your stupid Thomas toy oh thank you shf peee oh I love th are you happy now do you need anything else nope I don't need anything else are you sure I'm sure you positive I'm positive finally Thomas wait Thomas I'm getting kind of hungry I need I need some ice cream chocolate ice cream Chad baby what Junior can I get some chocolate ice cream please you want chocolate ice cream now oh no wait wait chunky monkey I've heard of that before I want chunky monkey ice cream you didn't think about that 2 minutes ago well no I need it now please it would make my leg feel better what does it have to do with your leg your leg doesn't eat ice cream well you don't know what my leg does you can't judge him don't judge my leg just give me some ice cream oh my freaking God you're such a freaking bread I swear to God here's your Chunky Monkey ice cream Junior yay chunky mon hey what that says it's banana flavored ice cream I wanted chocolate well you should have known it has some type of bananas in it it has monkey on it well I thought it was chocolate because it says chunky and chunky means fat people and fat people eat chocolate that makes no sense where do you get your logic from and you better eat that ice cream I went all the way to the store for it well the only reason I wanted it is cuz it said chunky monkey and that sounds silly really you should have just said you wanted chocolate ice cream just eat the ice cream Junior but it's banana flavored and gross like you oh really oh really yeah well hey I need something else what why why I need spoon duh Julia I swear to God M Chef Pee I love this chunky monkey oh you do I thought you wanted chocolate ice cream well I did want chocolate ice cream but you didn't listen and got me the wrong one but it still tastes good it's amazing yeah yeah whatever now if you don't need anything I'll be in the kitchen what you couldn't just say peeee sh peeee well you are running away really fast um can you go put this in the refrigerator I'm done eating it you you're you're done yeah and also can you go get me a coloring book a coloring book yeah I really want a color please go get me a coloring book I would have to go all the way to the store to get a coloring book I just love the store please I want a coloring book with crayons my God Junior you get on my nerves I just want to hit you so bad dinosaur crayons please go go go please it'll make my legs feel better yay col book oh man my leg's pretty short but oh man soon I'm going to have a coloring book it's going to be so much fun here's your stupid coloring book Elmo yes I had to race all the way to the store before it closed just to get it ready set color I'm ready to color shfp where's my dinosaur crayons whatever here's your stupid crayons dinosaur crayons yeah is that really necessary not like the Crayons can hear you that's what the dinosaurs sound like oh I did not know that yeah okay I'm going to color um that's that's all I needed chpe okay I'm going oh wait wait wait wait wait wait I thought that was all you needed now I have to go pee what what yeah I have to go pee why you telling me this well I have a broken leg I can't walk to the bathroom can you bring me a bucket or something to pee in no you better crawl your ass in the bathroom wa shpi I can't walk it's going to hurt my leg can you bring me like a bottle or a cup to pee in why would you need a bottle or a cup it's not the 1800s we just don't pay some buckets or nothing like that but my leg's broken I can't walk oh my God please sh B I got a pee you know what I'll go get the stupid cup Okay Go Okay Cookie Monster come on coloring you here's your stupid cup Junior okay wait wait what are you doing coloring Cookie Monster isn't it beautiful no he's not red what what the Cookie Monster is not red he's blue that's stupid why did you have to throw the freaking coloring book that's stupid Cookie Monster is stupid it's your fault that you color him red no I thought he was red but just give me that stupid cup I'm going to pee in here take your pee hurry up ew ew ew pee is so gross hey sh B oh is that lemonade uh no but yeah yeah yeah yeah it is lemonade you can have it oh thank you B what what what what you're driving me crazy Junior what well I need the remote to my TV you need the remote to your TV yeah you need that bad huh I want to watch TV oh so bad that you had the honk the freaking horn I got you Thomas I got you freaking ice cream I got you your coloring book with crayons now you need a remote well yeah it's all making my leg feel better cuz you know I have a broken leg oh oh I I I totally forgot I forgot you had a broken leg so can I have my remote please here's your stupid remote I hope you better not call me again I swear to God I will put your freaking leg in the toilet and flush it okay well all I need is my remote thank you chpe whatever all righty kids it's time for doy the dragon hey kids I'm doofy the dragon what left me she took the kids I hate my life and I don't want to live so I'm going to put a fork in the electric [Music] socket that's so funny doofy oh man I need something else [Music] baby yeah I'm Wrecking some kids what hey my controller's dying sh baby what do you want uh my controller is dying see it's blinking so I need batteries for it you need batteries yeah oh I didn't know you need batteries oh that's that's very important it it'll help you with your leg wouldn't it there's no one at the doors yet P go get it something else it's always something all right Junior the doctor's here the doctor wait what is he doing here yeah he came to check on your leg make sure everything's okay okay hold on I have to go to the bathroom hey uh doctor my my leg still feels kind of kind of broken oh really cuz it's been 3 weeks I think we can probably get that cast off you take the cast off no why well well cuz I think it should probably be better by now oh no I don't think it's better I I think it's broken I I I don't really think so just let me have a look at it no no no no no Mr please okay believe me ever since I broke my leg look at all the cool stuff people have been giving me it's been really cool so please don't take the cast off I've been getting so much free stuff it's so awesome okay wait a minute didn't didn't I tell you not to be a dick what what yeah I think I told you that exact thing just 3 week I don't think you did I'm pretty well I'm pretty sure I did hey hey hey let's just rewind 3 weeks and see what I said okay I mean I wouldn't milk it or anything I mean don't be a dick but yeah see see I told you that exact thing almost word for word oh oh I'm sorry I forgot well anyway please don't take my cash off please let's just let's just pretend that is that's still broken okay we can do whatever you want cuz I get paid either way but I'm going to tell you this right now comma can be trouble for you okay oh okay so what did the doctor say junior um he said that uh my my leg is super broken like it it it did it has not healed yet it hasn't healed at all no well he said it healed wrong and he had to rebre it and so ow ow I think I need more ice cream and more I think I need I think I need a PS4 a PS4 I'm tired of my Xbox One the battery keeps dying and my controler it's stupid so go get me a PS4 cuz oh that make my leg feel better Junior I hate you so much yes oh my God I love this I'm going to get so much free stuff here's your stupid Hulk Hands Junior y I have Hulk Hands I'm the Hulk everyone get out of my way sh oh man please don't bother me anymore I got your hul hands I got you dinosaurs Legos freaking video games the Xbox a Hawaiian Punch why do you need Hawaiian Punch well cuz I like Hawaiian Punch especially cuz I'm Hulk punch are you serious oh just leave me alone J I'm going to go and sit down oh my God look at all the stuff I got just by saying that my leg's broken oh my God this is so so cool Hulk gu the TV on hey kids it's me doofy the dragon I'm having a meeting greet with all my fans tonight at the mall you can get my autograph and we can kill ourselves together this is a once in a-lifetime Opportunity [Music] literally I'm mean green with do me the dragon I have to go I have to go I have to go I have to go Junior guys what are yall doing here oh Chef PE let us in oh we're getting ready to see doofy the dragon the meet and greet yeah can you go oh yes CU I can go I can definitely go wait wait how are you walking Junior yeah oh no I'm I'm not walking I I I just had a burst of energy ow my leg it's it's so broken it is broken so so you can't go your leg is broken no no no I I still can go y'all can y'all can carry me no we're not going to carry you no no well maybe I could uh maybe I could get you know a crutches or a wheelchair nah oh wait wait come on Cody we're running late no guys I can still go I can still go oh sh baby where's my horn what Junior what do you want my friends are going to go meet and greet with doy the dragon I have to go but your leg is broken Junior yeah I know it's broken but maybe you could carry me right carry you what what am I I'm not a wheelchair you can't just ride on me I have to see do the dragon it's the once in a lifetime opportunity that's what the TV said look you can't go anywhere until your leg is fixed the Dr sisle I have to go meet jofy he's my idol I love him please it's not my fault you shouldn't have fell off of the freaking playground if my leg wasn't broken could I go yeah I guess well then guess what my leg has not been broken for the last 2 weeks it healed two weeks ago so I can go right so you've been lying yes I'm I'm a lie I'm a big fat liar and I want to go see doofy so take this cast off my leg so I can go see doofy so you lie to me the whole time for the last two weeks yes the last two weeks I brought you Legos dinosaurs everything and you lied to me I catered to you the first 3 weeks was true the last two weeks was a lot you fre Al I can't believe you I can't you for weeks and you want about the leg break the other leg my leg my leg hurt y your other leg is broke yeah it hurts so bad how does this keep happening to you I don't know sh B broke it because he was mad that I lied about my other leg being broken I used for like two weeks oh wow wow Karma yeah what did I tell you about Karma I don't think you told me anything about it uh yes I did rewind it do it but I'm going to tell you this right now comma can be trouble for you okay oh donkey this is the life right here eating Sly cheesecake for breakfast lunch and dinner just living it up the life right here but oh sweet baby Jesus that Rumble was horrible oh I need coke I need it oh oh come here [Applause] cook I need donkey donkey donkey oh oh something isn't right here oh my bowels oh I need the crap oh I need the crap oh donkey I don't feel right oh there's my Throne I've missed you baby oh oh I got to close the door we're about to have a nuclear war in here oh I'm about to sit down I'm about to go where no man's ever gone before it's one small crap for Shrek one giant M for donkey to clean up oh this is oh this is bad oh donkey I Need a Doctor oh donkey don I'm coming Shrek what can't be that bad what Shrek Shrek Shrek what's wrong Shrek what's wrong the the Devils have possessed my bowels what do you want me to do oh this is a turn from hell what do you want you want me to get your a doctor please don't get don't get okay I'll get you a doctor okay okay oh God I'll be right back I'll be right back okay wait what okay if I'm not here when you get back the toilet has taken my my soul okay and and you can have my cheesecake okay well okay well I'm going to go to your doctor okay all right hurry oh donkey oh oh oh oh donkey this is a this is a pain I've never felt before oh oh it feels like feels like all my intestines are about to exit out my butthole oh oh I've got nothing to hold on to oh oh don't oh donkey I think it's over oh what is that noise is my crap trying to talk to me oh I can't be talking crap oh I got to look oh oh donkey what is this oh it can't be it it can't be oh come come here little baby oh come here little fell you're all right daddy Shrek is here he is here I can't believe I had the baby I'm going to be a great daddy and and Mommy I'm both don't cry baby daddy mommy Shrek Is Here doctor doctor he's in here he's in here um where's Shrek where where is he Shrek where are you dony he's in here surprise Shrek are you okay are you okay guess what Mario what I had a baby what I know I was surprised too but like that's not even that's that that's not even possible I I know I was just taking the crap and I was like and then there was baby but but doctor is that even possible no it it's it's not possible you are a male correct Shrek yes I am a male well see there is no scientifical reason why a male would have a baby well then then why do you think he why do you think he had a baby I have no clue but I will research it for you okay how are you going to research it I um I would like to take a piece of the baby's skin or hair or maybe even a urine sample no preferably blood no doctor you will not touch my baby why ever not Shrek Shrek what's wrong with you he just wants to touch my baby for his Twisted Pleasures he's a pedophile he's a doctor go he's a do he's a doctor um sir it's just a standard medical procedure it's just a simple DNA test yes it's just a test I don't care I don't want anybody touching my baby get out both of you oh okay sir I'm terribly sorry no it's okay I don't know what's wrong with him don't get what Shrek what do you want come back here I need to talk to you what do you want Shrek don't okay I think it's time that you start helping out with the baby helping out with you just told me to leave and plus it's not my baby I don't have to help you at all it is your baby cuz you're practically the father how am I the father he looks just like you donkey how does he look just like me he's short he's fat and he's going bald he looks nothing like like me he looks just like you I'm not the father and that it doesn't even make any sense okay you know what I'm leaving I'm not helping you at all donkey you're still going to have to pay child support what child support is not my baby yes it is donkey no no I can't believe you would sit here and bad mou the family in front of the baby he doesn't need this he's too young it's okay Junior sh the bad daddy will leave now won't you Daddy fine Shrek I'm just going to leave I was going to help you a little bit with the baby cuz I felt bad that you had some random baby in the toilet but no you can forget it I'm not helping you at all cuz you're being crazy I'm just leaving don't ever come for me for help anymore it's okay baby don't cry all this yelling got you worked up and I bet you're hungry for some chees cake W let's go get some cheesecake with Daddy wo oh I just love cheesecake I'm on my eight piece Junior how many pieces are you on Junior you have you battle touch your first piece here let let me cut it for you all right Junior open wide hey junior junior eat your cheesecake right now Junior don't ignore me don't ignore your daddy here comes the crap Express turn eat your cheesecake Junior eat your cheesecake eat your cheesecake right now or else you're not going to get dessert which is more Che cheesecake Junior eat it fine if you're not going to eat your cheesecake then I will here Wy what you doing FR I just got me a new cow yep I went down to the cow Market picked up this whole B around here wait am I seeing double trip there's like a little miniature version of you right there you all sing double with it cuz I had a baby oh congratulations shre he looks just like you and um like a bit like Mario in there too that's what I said but Mario's like no oh well it's all right Mario will come around eventually I'mma play with him a little bit all right come your goody where's the Woody where's the Woody he lost Woody there he is oh found the Woody oh oh my where did the Woody go there Woody where's the Woody there he is where's the baby there he is you did a real good job here shre he's a cute baby there's nothing wrong with him well Woody um there is something wrong with him he doesn't eat cheesecake oh well what kind of Cheesecake are feeding this right here well shck that that's the problem it's too big he need pureed cheesecake needs to be ground up in uh like liquid form you know what I mean yeah but I don't know where to get it stay right here Shrek I'll go get you some all right Shrek this right here Jello strawberry cheesecake yeah we're going to take some of it we're going to put it in this bottle right here and he's going to eat it up like a big old V yeah it's actually working with he he's eating his cheesecake bottle yeah that's right I'm genius I should have kids of my own well if you need any more help Shrek I'll be out in the yard Hing for some shrimpos oh Junior has to burp all right burp Junior W just like your daddy speaking of being just like your daddy we must take a crap together let's go oh just like Daddy oh like Daddy H oh poop just like your daddy Junior W yes oh that was a that was a good one oh Junior we've eaten cheesecake together we've taken a crap together you've had a long hard day we should go to sleep okay Junior I made your crib all ready for you come on time to go night night tuck you in all right good night Junior oh we forgot to say our prayer to the god of Cheesecake put your hands together baby junior all right dear heavenly cheesecake we would like to thank you for being so creamy and delicious thank you for giving me the opportunity and blessing me with another me and thank you for allowing me the opportunity to terrorize and Destroy every toilet in the world amen good night baby junior oh so tired it's been a long exhausting day it's a good thing I bought those uh Fon lights ah much better Junior please that is trying to SL be quiet Junior please be quiet Junior Daddy's trying to sleep all right I'll get up I don't want to walk all the way over that to turn on the light let me let me try to [ __ ] junior just chill that can't [ __ ] [Music] oh it's a good thing I finally farted oh it was an odd number two if it was even we'd still be in the dark oh all right let's see what's the matter with you oh o Junior oh you're just like your daddy come here you time to go change your diaper ah yes all right baby time to change your diaper you got a big nauy I can feel it oh oh Junior let's get this diaper off of you oh Junior oh Junior what was that all right let's get the diaper off of you Junior oh this is oh this is a naughty this is huge naughty oh Junior look Junior this is good Junior just like your daddy just like your daddy all right Junior I got your new diaper oh Junior don't PE on Daddy stop oh don't peel daddy oh is in my mouth what is wrong with you oh all right oh bad baby bad baby all right I'll just change the baby diaper he's all ready for bed oh I bet you feel better getting that £10,000 crap out of you oh I forgot your uh first crap diaper for your scrapbook all right Junior time to go back to bed now that we got that big crap out of you you sleep like a baby oh you are a baby who's a call baby you are good night Junior time to go to sleep oh nice relaxed I forgot to turn off the light and I don't have to fart Oh Daddy can't F Junior oh Junior oh Junior help Daddy I can't [ __ ] Junior Daddy can f Junior help Daddy fart never mind Juni I got it Junior Daddy Daddy has it you can't fart once I fart just chill out Junior ah there we go junior junior don't do that don't fart after daddy farts and turn off the light don't do it go to sleep junior junior stop it don't fart stop fting finally donkey junor swear to God if I have to give up much better Junior It's Time daddy and you have a little talk if you fart one more time one more time I will beat you with your cheesecake don't fight okay okay okay okay okay okay I think it's over time to go to sleep oh Shrek Shrek Shrek wake up oh wake up 5 more minutes no sh pleas you got to wake up right now why don't care just just wake up you have to wake up right now don't care what what what don't care just turn on the news right now you got to see you got to see it why because just do it please oh Don you Don waking me up at 9:00 in the morning who does this I'm surprised you didn't wake up Junior oh breaking news the S Cheesecake Factory has been C cloning their cheesecake products this has led to people who have consumed a cheesecake to give birth or to poop out a clone of themselves if you do not wish to keep your clone you can give it to the sly cheesecake company and they will dispose of your clone properly and humanely so it was the Sarah Le cheesecake that made me have Junior yes Shrek that's what I wanted to show you child support no no child support no shre it means that you can you can give Junior to the Cheesecake Factory and and they'll get rid of them like because they's the one that caused it no no donkey why no here my baby no sh but it's just a clone I mean you don't even love him it's just a clone we get rid of him and then he's annoying you don't get you don't understand we ate cheesecake together it's okay Shrek I mean I'll eat cheesecake with you no it's not the same donkey it's not the same I've had I will take care of him for 18 years of his little life but Shrek is just a clone you can get rid of him he'll be off your back he'll stop annoying you it's not the same donkey he's mine he came from my c we ate cheesecake donkey cheesecake together we ate it oh you I don't expect a baldheaded Italian to understand just leave me alone donkey let me be with my but are you sure that's what you want to do Shrek yes donkey it's my calling I must take care of Junior he's mine okay Shrek if that's what you want to do then fine but I mean if you ever want to get rid of them the S Le cheesecake company will always take them back donkey I will never get rid of him okay okay well bye Shrek bye donkey don't worry Junior I'll I'll take care of you until you're 18 I can't believe Junior's finally leaving me time goes by so fast Junior I got your bags ready oh thanks Dad I was just taking a crap you should have seen it was huge oh that's my boy I raised your well didn't I oh yeah you did I can't believe my Junior's finally going off to college oh wait let me get your bag I packed it for you and everything I put your favorite snack in there cheesecake all right thanks [Music] Dad I love you dad I love you too son bye [Music] [Music] dad goodbye Junior oh [ __ ] I love Call of Duty so much [ __ ] I love it been my baby mom shut up we don't care Charlie Brown Charlie Brown 678 is that you is that you talking mess I know you ain't talking mess after I whop your booty last time my blind Grandma can play better than you and she in a nurs home dude I don't care about grandmother okay just us shut up I'm trying to play this game I see how it goes you better you better watch out next game f I got you [ __ ] Call of Duty fans get ready for quadruple XP Weekend it starts right now four times the XP all weekend long qu XP Weekend folk Charlie Brown Charlie Brown you have quad XP Weekend leave me alone about to turn up man got to get my 5 out energy cheers Jesus all right about to turn up man Charlie Charlie I just got me a 5 Hour Energy for I'm about to turn up this quadruple weekend how about you folk alone I'm going to report you yeah all all all oh man that that 5 energy F ain't doing nothing for me man feel like a 5c energy man but I'm about to go ask Mario for his credit card about to go get me some energy drink folk I'll be right back man hey Charlie Charlie hold it down folk hold it down I'm reporting you where Mario at what are all these charges on my credit card bullets Kool-Aid a mat pack what's a m pack hey F come here what do you want Black Yoshi I need you to do me a solid fol now playing what is it fol I I need to borrow your credit card why do you need to borrow my credit card Black Yoshi because Call of Duty is having a quadruple XP weekend fol and I need I need some energy drinks energy drinks yeah F come on let me you're not going to buy energy drinks with my credit card Black Yoshi energy drinks are bad for you why fol because they're just not not good for you you need to go buy like a salad or something and stop playing Call of Duty so much that's all you do go play go play a sport or something like football come on please follow let me borrow your credit card you're not borrowing my credit card Black Yoshi there's charges right now that I don't even know what they are what the what's a m pack well I don't know what you crazy white people buy I just need energy drinks you're not buying energy drinks with my credit card Black Yoshi just go away Forget You folk next next time you need me I ain't going to be there oh okay you Mario okay whatever I got to call the bank I don't know what a map pack is chef peee chef peee can you tell me what do you see on that plate right there the steak you ordered H the steak I ordered that's really funny cuz I never ordered a steak I ordered a hot dog do you not remember that shfp shfp I'm hungry so I want you to make me a medium rare steak and I want it in 5 minutes or I'mma kill you you got that good a hot dog you never asked for a hot dog you asked me to make you a steak medium rare steak I remember you came in here like shut make me a steak I've been hungry all 5 minutes please make me a steak or I'm going kill you and then you have your son coming in here like your oh please please I I need a little snack oh come and play horses with me ah please please that doesn't fly with me now you can't even make up your mind over this thing come on Bowser give me a break first of all me and my son do not sound like that your imitations are so horrible and second of all this steak needs to be turned into a hot dog in five minutes because you suck at cooking I never ask for a steak and you need to get it right okay or I will murder you I don't like using killing anymore killing is a bad turn I will murder you you got that okay oh Bowser I can't stand him I know he asked me for a steak I know it and then he expect me to change this into a hot dog how am I going to do that I'm not a magician God I wish I could just kill him get him out of my life why I can I can hire a hitman oh why didn't I think of this sooner yeah where's the phone book where is it time to find this Hitman hope it's easy enough uh no we don't need any life insurance we're trying to take lives right now um o need a Hitman called Black Yoshi 555 o folk I don't know what a folk is but whatever all right three five five 5 oh folk okay yeah man forget Mario man he won't let me borrow his credit card to buy some energy drinks man whatever I'm just going to sit here play me some Call of Duty oh man my phone ringing yo what's up folk who's this oh hello uh my name is Chef Pee uh sorry F uh I don't deal with PE PE that's gay fol no no that's my name I'm I'm looking for a Hitman come on man be for real F your name PP what's code word man code word code word code word oh code word uh the code word is Koolaid all right Bo who am I looking to kill it's my boss Bowser he makes me so angry all right uh one angry boss that'll be about uh uh $5,000 folk $5,000 I can't afford that there has to be something else I can do I'm a chef I can cook something for you I know um I got some steak right here nah folk I only take cash who hold on folk you said you said you a chef right yeah I'm a chef I can cook anything oh folk do do you think you can make me uh an energy drink with purple Kool-Aid in it that'll keep me up like all weekend long F I'm talking energy and purple Kool-Aid fol can you do it uh uh yeah yeah yeah sure I can do that all right we got a deal then you made my Koolaid and I kill booer all right I kill your boss for you all right bye-bye thank you so much thank you thank you thank you all right folk I'll be there soon bye yeah I got my Kool-Aid energy drink for yeah yes finally I'mma Be a free man now I got to make some some type of energy drink how am I going to do that oh I I can't really make one but I I have the money to buy [Music] some okay I got every single Monster I could find this will be perfect I invested all of my life savings just for this one moment and then I know it's going to be worth it he's going to kill my boss my boss Bowser now I got my theory it's going to be the perfect Theory correct me if I'm wrong but if I mix every single one of these energy dresss and just put it all into one it makes a big explosion of energy in your system it'll be full of energy for like weeks it'll be the perfect one and I got to add that little Kool-Aid that he's been asking for but mix it all together and just he just takes it to the mouth just gum it down he'll be full of energy just just running everywhere I'm full of energy just talking about it it's time to get started but first I'm going to start my music music playlist oh [Music] yeah oh yes my beautifuls [Music] [Music] okay I got the picture now I got to get all of these little bitty drinks inside of this thing we're going to start with this one sounds nice nice Oho a little bit of flavor M come on incredible Hook oh somebody going to need some muscle after this want to need a redab after this drink woo oh man I can smell the energy smells [Music] nice [Music] my concoction is complete oh yeah I need my special ingredient yeah it's perfect now oh yeah I almost forgot I got to get the Kool-Aid we going to come in here and check out my man and see how he's doing with my Kool-Aid energy drink all I got to do now is add this final ingredient the Kool-Aid w f what are you doing man you you told me to add the Kool-Aid this is the Kool-Aid right folk everyone knows black folks don't drink Cherry Kool-Aid since when oh since forever folk since the beginning of time man they drink grape Kool-Aid man what you doing so where am I supposed to get this grape Kool-Aid I got it right here F okay then just you this is how much you add right here what that that much yeah FK look at it it's already all look at it's gorgeous F exactly what I want you bald out here man you got every one of the monsters I tried to make the perfect one for you just make sure you kill my boss we'll do F yeah just start and give it one good stir yeah does it look appetizing right it it looks delicious huh yeah B man we going we going to turn up with this right here delicious enough to kill my boss absolutely both okay that's that's good enough to know oh yeah F that that good right there smells delicious right yeah F you you going to P me some or what you just going to stay here and smell it all day ctis I got you I got you here yeah oh look at it looks so energy likee and full of drink I guess all right F about to take a sip see how good you did man it looks pretty damn good but you know I'm I'm going hit that sit one time okay what's what's are you okay where the black Yoshi go black Yoshi come down here right now you still have to kill my boss what what did I just hear what I think I heard uh what did you hear Bowser uh that you wanted to kill me oh no no you have it all wrong Bowser it's just a misunderstanding I meant that I want to kill your test bus with this enemy energy drink I just made energy drink you're supposed to be making me a hot dog see see it's it's hot dog flavored I had to grind up some hot dogs in the blender and made the drink for you H I guess that does make sense my jaw was hurting a little bit yeah yeah you should take a sip of it okay I miss there's something wrong yes my energy drink is making every everybody disappear hey shabi what you up to uh nothing you want to try my energy drink oh yes I got a solid in dude you lose Joseph what what dude tell me how I lost what didn't I have solid well yeah you had solid but you can't get the eightball Winer you lose this game is stupid when you said pool I thought you meant an actual swimming pool not billage well I mean this is this is a this is a pool who's that I don't know come answer the door with me it might be a kidnapper hello hey Cody you came over to play well no actually I just wanted to invite you guys over for Hanukkah what oh it's like Jewish Christmas Christmas presents like Santa Claus yeah it's at my house it'll be great wa at your house I'm not going dude I already know I'm not going over to your house your house is weird Cody well I know but it would' be really cool you get 12 presents well that's what my mom said 12 presents 12 presents Jo yeah 12 presents I still have to think about it dude I'm definitely going Cody okay uh I'll see you at your house tonight Cody cool Joseph Joseph you have to go dude no I'm not going at all Cody's house is weird if you want to go go ahead if it's cool I might go next year how about that but 12 presents Joseph no no I'm not going to risk it dude forget it okay Joseph okay okay 12 presents 12 presents I'm coming for the 12 presents and that's it I just want those 12 presents okay okay let's do this Jesus Christ oh no C shut up man what man what you want uh hey I'm I I came over for hanuka oh look I'm not here for no no Girl Scout cookies no Salvation Army or no toys for toats okay no no no I Cody's uh Hanukkah oh oh you have a Hanukkah my Jewish brother come here okay welcome to my Jewish home I've been here before mhm well I'm going to get C Jewish ass oh okay what oh hello what is this oh this is just the Nazi cheeseburger say hello to the Nazi cheeseburger uh hello why do you have this oh well every Hanukkah we get a Nazi cheeseburger and we say mean things to it and we beat it up and call it names okay why are you smiling Nazi cheeseburger you're a monster give it a whack whack the Nazi cheeseburg Whack It Whack the Nazi cheeseburger okay wack it h harder yay take that Nazi cheeseburger oh okay so now what oh come look at a Jewish cake [Music] okay oh Canen you dirty boy oh you get whipped cream all over your well-toned abs and looks like we're all out of paper towel so I guess I'll just have to lick it off Cody your Jewish friends here Jo in I I'm having presents told you get in the Liv room what in the Jewish hell I um I I I you better explain yourself boy I I I I I have no excuse dad I I I think I think I have a problem well cut all that wickedy whack out and get in the living room your friend is here oh um clean yourself up can we have company uh and put some clothes on uh and this is our Jewish cake oh wow it says money on it for some reason we like pennies oh why doesn't it say like happy huko oh look and over here it's Jud off the red noos reindeer you mean Rudolph the Red Nose rinder jol with your wallet so tight won't you manage my finances tonight honey come bring in the manure all right I got the manure honey oh good oh good what what is that oh that's the manure yeah it's the manure like for Jesus birthday his second birthday oh so so so it's like birthday CS you blow them out yeah you blow them out on the ninth day oh wow this is this is really cool well um where's my 12 presents oh we we're going to get to that later oh yeah and Cody said he he's on his way he just getting prepared or something like that I oh oh I almost forgot I have to go get the bacon okay wow this is so cool uh uh uh and perfect I I guess he's perfect hey Junior oh hey Cody wait where's Joseph oh uh he said he would not come even for 12 presents oh oh oh I see you defeated the Nazi cheeseburger uh yeah yeah yeah he uh went down with two punches yeah wow two punches that that's a new record is that really part of Hanukkah no none of this is really really no they don't really know how to celebrate Hanukkah they just kind of overcompensate with all this Jewish stuff so so the money cake is not part of Han no that's not traditional at all what about jolf what jolf the red noos no that's clearly just Rudolph the Red Nose your mom was calling him Judo yeah I know what she said but that doesn't mean it's right well your dad was showing me the manure and it was pretty like wait wait wait wait the what the manure oh he means the manura I told him it's called a manura but no he they're not really Jewish they they just dry really hard oh okay well I really don't like Hanukkah so far well this isn't real Hanukkah but oh oh I made something I have to show you made something yeah what do you think what what is that oh the the place match this year you made these yeah I made it myself happy Huna yeah it's pretty clever like Hanukkah with huny yeah yeah isn't it great well who's that supposed to be in the picture what do you mean that's is that supposed to be you of course I mean look at my face that's clearly me but it's that's not your body Cody what it's got my face right on it I mean we went to a studio and had that done so there was no Photoshop whatsoever no obviously not okay I mean that's that that's that's good I guess yeah so uh where's Ken oh oh oh ken um I I have to go get Ken okay oh my God this is not worth 12 presents okay I got all the bacon and pork M that bacon smells good I know Jews love bacon it's so koser oh wow hey Junior got can why is he naked mom why do you have bacon and pork you get K butt out of my face cuz we love bacon and pork Oh my God Judith you know I love my bacon no none of this is kosher at all it's all wrong a happy manure happy Mano Judah sing some Hanukkah songs Hanukah song okay uh Jud off the red nose rain s it bab mom you didn't even change the words don't worry about it Hanah Hanah Hanah that's not even a song The Fish and and the pork and all the happy kids and kids what get K off okay yeah he's all naked it's getting really gross I'm about to leave burn man burn there will be presents I I don't know exactly how many I want my 12 presents now this is Mana bur slow I I I know there there will be presents okay I maybe 12 I can't guarantee 12 what is this is really weird I don't really like damn I'm messing up the cake another it's fine none of this is right anyway it doesn't matter and now we lighting the last candle okay now it looks beautiful happy Manu okay so what happens now on all right now who wants to blow out the candles to get the 12 wishes one there's nine candles not 12 and you're not supposed to blow them out dad oh shut up Cody you are a new Jew you are new to Judaism and you need to learn the rules uh excuse me Mr ucer oh what's up little [ __ ] okay uh so there's only nine candles how do you get how do you get 12 wishes out that's a good question oh oh oh yeah that's a real good question um you you multiply by two right and then you that's 18 then then you have to divide by uh a certain number that I can't remember right now but I know I know it's 12 it has to be 12 okay 12 wishes okay so it's like all right now buy your hands for Jewish prayer oh I love his prayers every year okay everybody shut up all right thank you Jewish Jesus for allowing us to live another Jewish Day on this beautiful Jewish Earth and thank you for Judo the red no reindeer for lighting the path for you to die on AC cross and thank you for allowing jolf to light that beautiful red nose and let it shine so bright everybody thank Judah thank you Judah thank you J thank J all right now who wants to blow out the candles make their 12 wishes like like like a birthday yeah like it's kind of like a birthday cake not really but I I want to do it oh all right little [ __ ] blow out the candas this is my first Hanukkah show I want to do it oh this is a new one for you okay so uh what do I want to wish for I want my 12 damn presents yeah good good blow okay so what did you wish for Cody I like how you noticed that anyway uh I wish for my 12 presents oh 12 presents yeah um yeah so uh you know 2012 presents oh oh oh we'll get okay let's get to that oh okay okay little [ __ ] you want your 12 presents you got to beat that Nazi cheeseburger open yeah you have to whack it with the Shabbat yeah get that Shabbat and beat his ass the Nazi cheeseburger yeah he ain't Jewish mom don't don't make him do this this is oh he has if you ruin this I promise I'll beat you again oh so so I grabed the shabat yeah okay get to Whack Him whack that Nazi cheeseburger beat his ass I already I already knocked him off I already knocked them off the ceiling fan though well you got to put a hole in them to get your presents you have to finish him so my 12 presents are inside this Nazi cheeseburg you got to destroy the Nazi cheeseburger to get your present on okay this is messed up all right Nazi cheeseburger whack it hit it do it do it now kill it do it hit the Nazi cheese kill that Nazi okay good hit little [ __ ] good job oh wow I actually uh broke them open empty out the Nazi cheeseburg and see what your presents are oh all my presents are in here yeah it out okay got flip it over oh there you go golf balls what it was full of golf balls ah you can never trust the Nazi cheeseburger that's the truth so all my presents are stupid golf balls y that's not what I wish for I wish for cool presents 12 cool presents blame the Nazi cheeseburger them Nazis always get you oh oh but we still have the Shabbat fight so every everybody go to the table oh Shabbat the Shabbat fight okay these are the shabbats mom what the hell are you talking about Shabbat like robots yes the red one is the Nazi Shabbat and the blue one is the Jewish shab Shabbat oh I hope the blue one win say hello Shabbat like they have like a big Shabbat fight every year yes we have a Shabbat fight every year and for the Last 5 Years the blue one has won because the other one doesn't have batteries in it Cody okay so so like he's undefeated yeah yeah yeah he's undefeated now who wants to see a Shabbat fight I want to see a Jew win fight fight fight beat him up beat up that n beat him up come on shabat go beat up I don't want to see a n Win you got to KN off his head knock knock it off go go go go up come on do it you can do hanukkah's over Cody tell your friend to leave you have to go home Junior why I don't understand what happened well the Nazi shabbats never won before so now they don't know what to do when they think Hanukkah is cancelled well I mean I mean he was undefeated though other one he was yes and he finally lost so yeah so uh so you're telling me that this is the end of Hanukkah pretty much yeah so I came over here to get my 12 presents and I didn't get any I mean you can have the golf balls I don't want golf balls Cody that's I wanted 12 cool presents like you said and now you know what I'm never coming over to your house ever again I understand that's that's okay okay so you know what let me out let me out I'm leaving okay Ken where's the whipped cream so guys what do you want to do today huh I think it's see what you want to do today yeah what you want to play playtime Junior yeah playtime that sounds fun I mean I wasn't even thinking about that but sure let's play it but every time we play it it gets really dark and we get in a fight and but it's fun guys you want to play Joseph I'm down yeah okay let's play all right you're going to be Sally my daughter you're going to be my wife and we're all going to hate each other right all right let's [Music] go so k um I know you're dating my daughter but uh if you're looking for a more experienced woman uh you should give me a call okay time for your bottle what's for dinner oh oh oh you have pumpkin peas and a donut oh oh and your typical five beers damn it woman what am I going get a real meal that is a real meal what are you talking about that's junk food [ __ ] that's not junk food you eat this [ __ ] every night oh [ __ ] don't start this [ __ ] with me all the time y have me make a whatever whatever when are you going to get a real job you know I'm looking for a real job oh you're looking I'm always looking only time look the window please I'm trying to feed Phoebe oh you supp the breastfeed Phoebe Sally well I don't have any tits Mom thanks to your bad genetics it's not my fault oh it's her fault her chest is flatter than her [ __ ] back oh at least I don't have a 4 in penis 4 in is that's six [ __ ] no it's not it's a CM size penis I said it's 6 C you have a smell Pano yes he does like it's like Pluto it's not really like penis but people call it a penis it should be a penis it's not shut up B I need another beer oh yeah get another beer I drink because of you typal typical you typical you [ __ ] eat all the [ __ ] food fat ass oh you call me a fat ass yes oh my God I want to kill myself [ __ ] hate that [ __ ] we're out of beer well you're the only one that drinks it Junior I had a whole case in here last night well you drunk the whole case last night there's no way I drink that oh have you seen yourself you're disgusting we're disgusting have you seen yourself naked in the mirror [ __ ] Junior I can't believe you even went there went there you're ugly you know what you know what I'm glad we're divorced I'm glad we're divorced too I pray every night thank God what look look when are you going to pay the child support I need child support for sh child support yes you know I'm looking for a job well I need child support I don't care if you're looking or not I I'll get a job by the end of the day okay I'll get a job by the end of the day oh yeah you're right I can count as many Grain on sh on Earth before that happens get account oh man I'm so nervous about this job interview but I really need this job um excuse me sir I'm here for the job interview oh hey Junior may I take your order take my order Jeffy you're supposed to interview me oh okay yeah interview me do it again oh man I'm so nervous about this job interview um excuse me sir I'm here for the job interview Jeffy what you're supposed to interview me oh okay oh hey Junior may I take your order I'm here to apply for the job as an astronaut are there any jobs available oh yeah do you I think there's one left hold on one second okay but what do you uh what do you think about that um is that a stick figure with boobs mhm yeah um her tits bigger than her face Junior I'm talking huge yeah they are um Junior what do you think that could really happen what her tits be bigger than her face I mean yeah sure anything's possible I mean you drew it so no way yeah I mean looks like it um what can I do for you Junior I'm applying to be an astronaut with there any jobs available oh yeah um do you have your resume my resume uh yeah it's right here oh let's have a look at that MH oh Junior what I can't read oh but let's have a look at your uh your background check no oh I'm sorry I'm sorry no way Junior what you have a DUI on your record I can't be hiring somebody for the astronaut position if you got a DUI on your record that was a long time ago I was young and stupid I'm a changed man I have a big happy family I really need this job oh you have a family yeah big happy family you know wife and kid and has a kid you know all right well if you invite me to dinner and I see your big happy family then I just might hire you for the astronaut position you want to see my happy family mhm and then you'll give me the job yep as long as I have a happy family yep [Music] W washing dishes okay just be nice just be nice moo you big fat cow oh great now you're home yeah I'm home now I got to he your big though whatever I need a I need a be M dad what is it Sally I I think I want a sex change what a sex change look it's Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve okay s yeah Sally you just can't just change your gender whenever you want yeah but but Junior I'm tired of being a girl I want to be a dude Cody you agree to be a girl you're going to be Sally okay yes you're Sally God made you that way yeah God made you that way you can't just change your gender you don't have option you want to piss off God yeah you're piss off God you either have a penis or a vagina if you're born with a penis you have to keep it born with a vagina you have to keep it that's the rule that's the rules all right fine Sally shut up yeah so how did your job interview go today uh it went uh uh it uh what it went okay it's just the boss said that he'll hire me if he can come over for dinner tonight and see that I have a big happy family going to happen that is not going to we're not a happy family I know I don't even like you I don't like you either you stupid [ __ ] but look if we can just pretend tonight that we're a big happy family in front of my boss tomorrow we can go back to hating each other okay um I don't know what do I get of it well once I start getting paid Millions I get I get half I get half I get half of the half half of the half half half I get half of that [ __ ] I know so yeah you you you'll get half yeah I get half and and we're just just got to pretend that we're big happy family so so cook dinner okay everyone about their best behavior okay there you go phoi sit with Daddy okay everything looks perfect oh is everything ready for the dinner tonight mhm what what's the problem now why is there beer at the table because you drink it every night but I can't let my future boss see that I'm drinking beer what you don't want them to see the real you well I can pull up a picture of a cow and he can see the real you well I can pull up your police report and he can see the real you oh my God you know what [ __ ] if if my boss wasn't coming tonight I'd punch you in the face punch me in the face I would punch you in the face I would have [ __ ] hit you in the face I don't care I want to pun perfect timing that's my boss all right guys um just just please be on your best behavior just act like we love each other okay just for tonight I hate you okay everyone on your best behavior hey oh hey Junior wow nice place you got here yeah we can't afford our mortgage yeah I stay up late at night and have depression cuz I can't pay my bills but uh yeah uh dinner's ready oh okay well I can't wait to meet your family yeah they're really nice Dad what is it s like back the [ __ ] table well I I I know this might be a bad time but I missed my period so I think I might be pregnant again pregnant again yeah you're a [ __ ] just like your mother you're a [ __ ] a filthy [ __ ] hat beat uh uh Jeffy this meet my daughter Sally nice to meet you yeah she she she's a [ __ ] she's pregnant twice at the age of 16 I mean she's an all AG student right right Sally tell them yeah all A's all all A's and all D's and her [ __ ] puss okay come to the dinner table well that's great all right dinner is served hey um Junior where am I supposed to sit supposed to sit oh God what you Dad you do bab Junior what was that for she was in his seat such an [ __ ] dad uh Jeffy please sit down oh thank you Junior wow this dinner looks delicious Junior where is it uh well it was made by my wife so it's crap I mean I mean it's a plastic Pizza and uh ice cream in a cup wow Junior you got a beautiful wine oh thank you you're so nice uh Jeffy uh why are you blind um what's that supposed to mean Junior I mean my my wife's not only beautiful she's she she's pretty what pretty go ahead and finish your s pretty pretty pretty [ __ ] fat move move I mean I mean uh I mean actually she's uh we we insult each other that's how we compliment each other yeah oh well uh in that case all you [ __ ] are ugly as [ __ ] what thank you so much oh wow take your baby away crying you she's crying really loud get her out of here that's really loud D you give her give I'll she's L I'm going shut her up I'm going shut her up I'm going shut her up God shut up shut up shut up that'll shut her up Dad how'd you get her to stop crying uh let's just say she's on preheat okay so uh how did you two meet uh oh yeah tell him Junior cuz I would love to see if you can remember uh how did me and her meet uh well I was walking through this barn and I kept hearing this moo moo and I said I wonder what that is so I walked over opened the door and I saw what I probably would say is the biggest fattest smelliest cow in the entire world and I said I'm going to marry that and now here we are I don't remember it like that let me tell you my side of the story well I was taking a jailhouse tour and I wanted to find the biggest ugliest piece of scum that was there and guess who I found who oh you you dumbass oh that's it the disrespect oh the disrespect you calling me a cow yeah I'm calling you the biggest dad dad what does that smell uh your your mom's cooking oh no it's not because I cooked earlier uh uh what is that oh there's something in the microwave Sally go check okay what is that smell what did he put in here what my god dad you cooked my baby Jesus Christ Fe me Fe me so I'm really interested in being an astronaut yeah I really feel what the hell Dad you CED my baby junior what the hell are you thinking you have another one on the way what's the problem the hell is going on Who wants dessert oh I want dessert yeah honey go get the dessert yeah dessert oh okay act like I didn't see that dessert um here's the dessert it's green beans yeah green beans you like green beans what the hell is that it's it's green beans that's green beans oh I hate green beans so do I get the job [ __ ] no Junior I hate green beans but we have a big happy family [ __ ] your happy family your family is [ __ ] she it's all your fault it's my all your microwave e e e e e so disgusting so disgusting what's wrong Chef peipe I got poop on my shirt did you not see that big turd well I did thank you for unclogging my toilet oh you're welcome but it wasn't fun at all I hate being a plumber it sucks oh well you're just going to stand there naked oh I forgot I had no clothes on let me put on a new shirt okay oh stupid doooo shirt well um so you don't want to be a plumber what are you going to do now for a job I'm not sure I'm like out of a job now I don't want to cook for Bowser anymore that wasn't fun Junior just bothers me oh well um I have a friend that owns a company and he could he could possibly get you a job what he wait hold on a company hold on I'm almost had the shirt on all right so yeah yeah my friend Mr Goodman he owns a Goodman Enterprises and he could get you a job I mean you know I mean if you're if you're smart enough and if you're if you're good at at doing certain things so yeah no doubt Mario I am very smart just just give me a chance where's this place at um well I'll give you the address I'll call them and let them know that you're on your way so just go over there and I promise you he might give you a job oh dude I really need this job I hope he can all right that Goodman Enterprises all right I'll give him a call okay so just head over there okay put in a good word for me Mario I will H bag and crimp bottom um excuse me sir uh is this the place where I get my job interview oh yeah and uh and you are oh I'm PP oh yes PP yes H um so uh but you're here for the job interview for the uh for the debt collector salesman oh yes yes sir I'm here for any job that's available to be honest okay yeah absolutely um and if you are uh if you're looking for a job wh why are you dressed in such a crappy outfit like a like a dirty chef uniform that says Chef Pee PE on it um I have a legitimate reason um look my last job I was a plumber right so I was you know trying to unclock the toilet and then this I got F matter on my shirt H FAL matter yes I know it sounds weird but I I'm I'm being honest anyway that's besides the point that's besides the point anyway so uh what what prior job experience do you have um past job experiences uh look I don't really have any past job experiences besides being a chef um from for many many years as you can see from this this ugly attire and uh I was a cop for a day but I I I got fired because I tased someone okay and I was a plumber I told you about that one but the the feal matter problem you you know yeah feal matter yeah but besides that I don't have any more experience so do do you have balls p PE do you want to succeed here at Goodman Enterprises I'm I'm pretty sure I do but yes of course I want to succeed I want this bad okay do you have balls p PE I'm talking I'm talking big balls we we don't want little Tic Tac balls here at Goodman Enterprises you have to have watermelon balls freaking watermelon balls to work here I let me see your balls PP what let me see your balls I don't think this is appropriate to compare Hep I swear you need to show your balls if you want to work here um Goodman Enterprises does not accept failures okay if I show you my my balls am I guaranteed to get a job depends on how big your balls are PP I I mean I never compared to another guy like I'm not comparing them to another guy I'm I'm comparing them to Tic Tacs or watermelons I want to know what do your balls look like PP you want to really see my balls I want to see your balls PP God you want to really see my ball PP I want to see your balls fine there you see them PP we were talking metaphorically here I was I was totally kidding okay why you tell me anything well because the last couple people when I asked to see their balls they just walked down come I believe you but you got balls PP that's exactly what we need here Goodman Enterprises that's nice to know God damn it PP you're you're hir you go really yeah wow I could have done that from the start but um what do you have to do on the job PP your job title is debt collector and salesman okay okay all right you think you can handle that um yes uh I I can all right these people they did not pay their bills so they owe us money okay if they owe me money they owe you money you're here to collect that money yes I understand I hate a thief God damn it P words right out of my mouth okay yes they are yeah they're thieves they're Crooks okay horrible people disgrace to humanity yeah you got that right yeah so what you're going to be doing you're going to be calling these people PP you're going to be calling these people and getting that money from them okay oh no problem you are going to call them and you're going to say you owe us money you are okay those exact words this is this is your script PP okaye get after me all right okay okay hello hello my name is PE PE okay my name is PE PE okay no not I say you know no all right my name is PP my name is peee you did not pay your bill you did not pay your bills so help me God so help me God you are um you are very good and then after you get that money from them you sell sell sell okay I don't see how this is going to work get [ __ ] out of my office okay you're fire what I'm just kiding your high get out I'm confused I'm just going to go uh I think this is my office hey B what are you doing um nothing much I'm just getting prepared good all right well this is your phone right here you're going to be using that to call the customers to get my money back okay wait so so this is my office right yes it is I was lost for a minute all right and that computer you're going to use that to look up the clients and you're going to be using that to deposit the money that you get from them directly into my bank account okay oh okay all right across the hall here we have a screw ball how you doing screw ball good yeah that's screw ball hi screw ball don't talk in don't distract him okay he was employee of the year last year okay well that's that's nice I would like you will never be like him okay he's top priority do not distract him do not speak to him unless he speaks to you okay okay get to work PE PE make me some money all right I'll do my best oh what's the password Goodman didn't even give it to me God hey new kid um yes is is scre ball prickly pineapples what what are you talking about the password it's prickly pineapples oh thanks uh screw bottle P um yes I got something for you hold on you uh you want some meth I gotow I don't why would I want meth it's good for you no I'm good okay I I don't need any meth why because I'm a sober person why because I don't need drugs hold on hold on hold on I got a call coming in weirdo hello no no never Teresa no you cannot know no more extensions pay your goddamn bill sorry about that Teresa thinks she owns the damn place oh that's kind of harsh hold on I got to I got to piss okay damn yeah I just pissed um I have to go check something throw them have a good day kid oh my God that's so gross that's to get to work o my first customer looks like Margaret oh wow she is in the hole I hope she's a good person and doesn't give me too much too much talk it's ringing oh hello oh hello is this Margaret oh yes it is who is this um hi I am PP calling from Goodman Enterprises oh hold on hold on what' you say your name was oh um it's peee oh peee what are you calling about there well I was calling from Goodman Enterprises to let you know that uh I hate to say this but you owe us $500 $500 yes ma'am $500 oh wow what what are you going to do if I don't pay it well I I really need you to pay it because well if you don't pay it we're going to disconnect your services and we we don't need that happening ma'am Yeah Yeah well yeah do you think there's anything we can uh you know work out yeah what are you wearing dear oh yeah you like a big honky man what are you wearing I don't think that's necessary to know what I'm wearing oh it's very necessary I think we can work something out here uh no how about we just work out a payment that'll be nice oh yeah I can pay you let me take my dentures out oh oh oh God my D out oh where you at big boy I'll come down there right now it's just weird okay maybe I can do better on the next customer okay second customer hopefully this person isn't that as weird as marget was um bitman carito whoa he owed $750 man I thought Margaret was in the hole jeez come on pick up pick up H it's be carito residence what can I do for you today um hello bitman um wait is this bman see this is bman oh hi bman I am PP calling from Gman Enterprises and I hate to tell you this but you owe $750 and if you don't pay it you're oh oh be this is not bman what what do you mean you just told me you were bman what are you talking about bman used to live here seor this is no longer bman I'm confused can you like get me bman then oh let me check and see if he's here bman I know coming no he's not here I just heard you say that you come on you can't fool me sir I'm not fooling you uh okay bye why would you damn it why would he hang up in my face I didn't make any money oh come on I got to make some cash man this job is stressful I really need to get some water oh man I need some water breaks are good kid what oh what oh my God got to get to my desk PP come here damn yes good man all right PP do you know what this is um my guess would be a copy machine you're damn right p PE and you want to know what I need from you um what do you need 5,000 printed copies of your ass on my desk by 2 o00 okay I don't understand 2 o00 why would you need my pictures of my ass PP you don't get where I got asking questions you do it get it done okay 2:00 oh my God I don't understand why Goodman need photo copies of my butt it's so weird all right next customer um Tyrone hopefully this can go very smoth now how much do you owe Tyrone no $900 what's with these people in their payments all right um hello is this Tyrone uh yeah what's up um hi Tyrone my name is PP and I'm calling from Goodman Enterprises just to let you know that you ow $900 and if you don't pay us you're oh for real yes for real oh damn y um I was wondering can we establish a date on when you can pay or make your payment uh how much I owe again you owe $900 I I just told you this so sir oh uh yeah um I don't know if I got it what do you mean you don't know if you have the money you should have the money sir can you just give me a date maybe tomorrow today if you have it I mean like I know you can do it uh I really can't oh oh who who are you calling for again I'm calling for Tyrone we just established this like two minutes ago oh man you know what he's sleep what do you mean he's sleep I've been talking to him for like 2 minutes already I'm sick of this conversation can you just tell me when you're going to make the payment uh nah can you just wake up Tyrone then uh all right hold on wake up Tyrone please n he he ain't getting up I hate this damn job why does my life suck so much Hey kid uh you ready for that meth yet get my office run now what no good man good luck with that kid um excuse me Goodman did you call me in here sit down pee um okay you done [ __ ] me up pee pe oh um how did I do that Goodman P do you uh do you know what a corporation is um not really but I'm learning mhm okay well picture this a corporation is like a beautiful caterpillar okay all the caterpillar's legs are functioning and moving in the same direction they're always moving forward okay and you PE PE are a busted leg how am I AB busted leg you have prevented this company from moving forward I am a beautiful monarch butterfly just flapping through the woods okay this is what I'm doing these are my wings and what does that have to do with me because you have prevented this beautiful caterpillar of a business to not become a monarch butterfly I'm so confused right now Goodman pee PE get the fu out what get the out P oh god oh man oh so hungry me too but all we have left is this stupid Go-Gurt that's the last piece of food well I want it I want it too well I wanted more no I want it way more how about the oldest gets it well that's not fair cuz you're always oldish oh I didn't even notice that means I get it right no no I think the youngest should get it because um I'm not as fat as you and you can eat your fat what that makes no sense Junior I'm not even that fat I'm pretty slim well we got to find out who gets it I mean yeah we need to find a way to figure out who deserves this the most well we can flip a coin no that's boring are we in football no no o how about whoever survives getting hit by a car you know gets the Go-Gurt so okay the last person that is alive get to eat the Go-Gurt okay yeah we can do that right all right who goes first uh you oh well yeah I I guess yeah that's cool let's do it uh okay Dad I'm ready it's uh I don't think this is a good idea shut up Junior I can't even hear you this Go-Gurt is delicious you did good Bowser you did good M burnt mac and cheese my favorite sh B what are you doing oh I'm cooking burnt mac and cheese like you asked burnt mac and cheese no no no shpi I'm not eating that again you cook the same thing over and over again you like a robot all you do is cook the same thing clean and do it over again well that's what you ask for me you want me to be a robot I'll be a robot oh man I can't wait to eat burnt mac and cheese you're right B I am a robot be beep bo I'm shpb and I'm a robot yeah you are you are a robot shfp a big stupid robot shfp is a robot shp's a robot oh my God I got to call Cody and Joseph guys what's wrong guys yeah Junior you sounded really scared over the phone all right guys what I'm about to tell you is completely true okay what is it spit it out chef peee is a robot what jior what makes you say that no way he can't be a robot dude guys guys listen listen I was going to the kitchen because it's burnt mac and cheese night and I was whoo whoa whoa hold on tonight is burnt robot so he is a robot yeah he's a damn robot oh my God guys guys guys hold on Junior I ate the whole bow what about that one little burnt noodle right there oh trying to hide from me are you come to Daddy you Joseph did you eat the whole Bowl oh dude I ate all of it I'm stuff I almost feel like throwing up but you know because it's burnt yeah yeah but guys my dad basically confirmed it shef's a robot really yeah my dad said cheffy is a big stupid robot no way yeah guys so so so what am I going to do I didn't know I was living with a robot this whole time that's weird yeah so I think we should go try to communicate with sheipi cuz he's a robot you know like to the Rob robot yeah see if we can like tell he's a robot like you know look him in the eyes and stuff yeah oh yeah let's do it dude all right guys come on oh man I can't wait to eat some of this burnt macaroni and cheese uh Chef peee what do you want junior oh oh you want some burnt macaroni and cheese don't you um I'm oh no no thank you um well what do you want um we just uh we just um I've never seen a robot before me either he's so lifelike um we just want to stare at you yeah what why stop it why are you looking at me who made you shf peee my mom and my dad oh he thinks he's a person what did they make you in like a laboratory no they made me in the bed butt ass naked what where did they get the parts for you what look a baby is made when a man and a woman and 9 months later a baby is born wait wait wait wait so you need a woman to do that yeah well e gay wait wait wait wait so so girls have two butts what no Junior God just get the hell out of here um um shpe well then do you poop yes I poop what kind of question is that well like do you poop batteries why the hell would I poop batteries Junior do does it look like I put batteries up my ass well well that's how you get a get a charge right no I don't get a charge like that what the hell is wrong with you you think I'm a weirdo well how do you get a charge then I mean you can get a charge many ways you can go and outside and hit a old lady and get a charge W he get he gets charged up by hitting old ladies who would make a robot like that that the only way you get charged no you can get like a lot of charges doing illegal things I mean murder you can get a charge uh maybe burglary you can get a charge I mean you can burn stuff and get a charge burn stuff burn mac and cheese he gets a charge from burning mac and cheese that make sense now why would they make a robot that gets charged doing crimes I don't know that's awful um sh well how do you take a shower yeah I mean just like every other person I take off my clothes and get in the tub what do you mean but when the water hits you do you like short circuit what kind of stupid ass question is that Junior do I look like a robot us to us I swear to God these kids are stupid what are you doing Junior guys I have one more thing that'll prove shp's a robot what more proof do you need yeah what is it guys if he can't do this he's truly a robot okay come on let's take it Chef Pee what do you want to you're not trying to eat my burnt macaroni and cheese uh can you do me a favor what now can you do this caption on this website that says I'm not a robot sure I guess wait what the hell what are you doing on this website I watch Minecraft videos look look you're not watching anything on here you know what I'm going to take your laptop wait wait wait wait why couldn't you do the capture for me because I'm not going to do it on that website he's a robot he's not doing he's a robot he's a robot can't he's a robot just just go to your room you're not getting your laptop back okay he's taking my laptop for spare parts God he's a robot God he's a robot my God these kids are stupid guys so it's official Chef pee's a robot yeah yeah you think you know a guy yeah dude it's so weird yeah I know this whole time these last few years I've just been living with a robot I can't believe it I know it just it just doesn't make any sense who's that let's go see who that is who Could That Be hello what do you want you want to buy this rock what a a rock $10 why would I want to buy a rock it's a good rock I don't want to buy a damn Rock okay it's hard I don't care if it's hard or not I can buy a rock outside okay 20 I'm not about to buy a damn rock look just go leave please go and take your rock somewhere else man I hate people and I wish they all die oh my God oh my God guys you hear that you hear that guys guys did you just hear what I heard hates people he hates people he's trying to kill the whole race he's going to try to kill everybody on Earth what do I don't know I don't know guys guys guys it's up to us to save the world yeah we're the only one that knows about this we have to stop Chef peee the robot yeah how are we going to do it though I don't know um water right water would would would kill him yeah let's try water let's try water yeah let's do it shabibi what die robot guys he's short Circ I think we get him why would you throw water in my face I I thought your mustache thirsty you I'm not thirsty you [ __ ] oh guys why didn't water work I don't know dude maybe his skin is hiding his circuits and everything yeah yeah like it's protecting it so we have to like rip his face off right oh yeah rip it off all right uh let's try to rip his face off yeah let's try that why is Junior being so stupid today uh yeah peee what now Junior can I touch your face what no but I really just want to grab your face I'm cleaning right now I can I just grab your face no no stay back I just want to grab your face I just want to grab your let me grab let me let me grab your face let me grab your face let me grab your face grab your face his face face well that didn't work yeah you just get really mad yeah that was how are we going to get his flesh off his face well maybe we could take like a baseball bat and just whack his circuits out of him yeah yeah dude and then we could submerge him in water just submerge him yeah that would kill him yeah yeah dude we got a plan Joseph go fill up the bath toe robot let's go okay Cody there shf be doing dishes like a freaking robot yeah so I want you to hit a home run okay okay got it you got him Junior why would you hit me with a back C I knew that would work I'm going to kill you1 where are you going Junior go the stairs go the stairs Junior what what you run Cody run just go without me Junior too late no Cody just get up I know it's too late for me Junior save yourself just get up Cody okay get good come on Junior you you can't run forever run go that way go that way dud junor come back here I'm not done with you come here time to no sh your time to do no no no no no no no no shab he he's dead he's dead guys what's wrong dude's dead no way dead man we had to guys we had to save the world yeah we did no more CH who's that I don't know Chef PE yeah what's up I just went on vacation on Christmas and I just came back but but but but you were a robot no no I bought a robot that looked just like me so y'all wouldn't get mad because I was on vacation but and how did he do uh did he do good did he look just like me he act like me didn't he I know I know just come look just come look okay what Junior you destroy my damn robot well well we thought you were a robot we thought you were going to kill everybody and no no that was a good robot I rented that robot how can you destroy something I rented I'm sorry Chef peip oh my God what am I going to do now can you do something for me real quick Chef Pee what now Junior um can you do the caption on this website so I can sign in W only 10 more minutes to tr friends come on oh I've been waiting I've been waiting oh wait wait what time is it dang it it's 6:00 a.m. oh got to wake up Junior so he can go to that stupid summer school thing Junior get your failure butt up Junior oh wake up wake up wake up Dad what was that for get up you know you got to go to summer school a summer school do I have to go today yes you got to go every day you're a failure you got to pass so you have to go well well what if I'm sick you you're not sick stop faking it okay Dad I'll go yeah you better are you taking me no I'm not taking you you dumbass Charlie your friend is on jeez oh well then who's going to take me H probably sh pee pee so you should probably go and wake him up God okay and hurry up I don't want to go I got to get my book I'm not even sleeping I know it's going to come it's coming it's just a matter of time a chef peee ah Chef peee here it comes Chef peee wake up D it what was that for I wasn't even sleeping well you got to take me to summer school oh duh I'm not the failure you are oh well can you make me breakfast first God so what do you want for breakfast then Junior um um I want french fries come on now you know you can't have french fries for breakfast how about the has brown or cereal no I want french fries you can't have it no no you're not eating french fries no I want french fries I want french fries I want french fries I want french fries yay french fries you better eat every single french fry every single one of them okay I'm going to eat this one and I'm going to wait a minute and I'm going eat that one no no we don't have time for that come on we got to get you to school you're going to be late bring your fries with you we can eat them in the car don't forget your book oh oh that's not my book that's your that's your cookbook oh that's for me yeah that's your cookbook that's kind of nice but but hurry up we still have to go come on all right come on Junior you're going to be late I'm coming oh oh yeah B Be My french fries damn it we don't have time for that come on just I'll I'll bite some fries later my French fries oh my French fries Chef BB shut up about those french fries you dropped them it's your fault but I want some more look I'll get you your stupid fries after you get from class okay you have to go to summer school first oh okay Chef peei now hurry up get out my car Bo I love school listen n i memorize my entire calculus book for homework because you're a nerd dude at least I do my work dude don't make fun of me my parents got a divorce I'm going to punch you in the face dude not in the face I have a medical disorder a I could be out outside playing right now but I'm stuck in stupid summer school and that stupid calculus book I didn't know what I was supposed to do with it I just gave it to sharpee as a cookbook me neither dude I just used it like to play soccer I just kicked it around that's cool dude I just burned my book I used it for s'mores you know had a campfire hanging with a couple of buddies you know eat it wow I mean well I mean I guess it wasn't that bad I wonder what the teacher's going to say about us uh not really doing the homework hey class was supposed to start like 2 minutes ago where's the teacher I sh D do I [ __ ] I'm late class I I stuck in traffic the whole way here the whole way and I drive by Suzuki and I hit every car in a parking lot on the way here so let's get to work class let's learn H okay class to start of the day we have a new for exchange student from Mexico her name is Cecilia come here Cecilia come tell the class how dumb you are cilia she dumb she dumb I don't know what she saying what are you saying you dumb go sit down CIA oh everyone laugh class okay okay stop laughing all right so today we're going to learn about drugs and how dumb they make you if you use them so we have officer Goodman as our guest speaker for today so come here officer Goodman and teach the class how dumb they are hello class I'm officer Goodman of guy py thank you thank you hey hey officer Goodman oh yes sir yes sir have you ever shot anybody yeah I've done it a few times cool well anyway anyway I'm here to talk about uh rape and drugs okay and to start off my uh my lecture here I have a real live criminal let's take a look at him okay all right clap this is Bubbles he's a really vicious criminal okay he's uh he's serving 15 life sentences for very dangerous crimes okay he's uh he he was charged with rape aggravated rape acquaintance rape um date rape and police officer R okay and uh and so does anybody have any questions for the criminals yeah oh oh I got a question hey bubbles wh why did you do the crimes you did like why did you rape people cuz I like booty calm down calm down the t is M oh oh oh I got a question for bubbles um excuse me Mr Bubbles how is jail what is it like well we get full course meals full course meals we get to watch all the TV that we want you get to watch TV too we share bunk beds with a roommate oh man I always wanted bunk beds we get the shower with our roommate you get the shower with your roommate too we get to play basketball outside wow you going to play basketball outside um um Jail's nothing like that because it's fun we ain't got no homework no homework I really want to go to jail now no no no no no no no no no no no no no next question please next question um do you get beat up in jail nah you know I'll never get beat up unless I'm doing the bean you know what I'm saying oh it's fist by this police Pig okay all right right there um we have uh we have time for one more question okay oh yes the uh the minority in the back iOS and like I said um I don't know what you're saying ma um did you understand that no no oh we didn't understand what you said we're just going to skip your question okay all right class uh now we're on to drugs okay um the bubbles do you approve of drugs no see how does a man who has nothing to live for not like drugs because drugs are bad okay what do drugs do to you that's a good question okay class if you do drugs it will make your PP small okay yeah I must have taken a lot of drugs all right class we're going to do a uh a real life drug bust here at the school I'm going to call my friend Jorge and he's going to uh deliver drugs to the school and I'm going to arrest him okay all right give me one second all right class I'm going to call Jorge and he's a drug dealer and that's bad because drugs are illegal okay I'm going to get them on the phone now oh Jorge yeah um I'd like to order some drugs you good yeah I'm delivered to the school you're not a police officer no no no I'm not a police officer yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I'll have the money a few minut all right bye bye all right class Jorge is on the way okay and uh when he opens the door and he shows me the drugs we're going to arrest him it's going to be really funny okay so y'all laugh I don't know what you said guys um anyway um bubbles I'm going to need to take those handcuffs because those are my last pair and I need to arrest jge in front of the class so uh can I trust you if I take those handcuffs off for you not to run yeah I'm black you can trust me [Music] okay's it's okay guys I'll catch him later always do go go run bubbles go your free I'm free wait wait wait wait I'm no stab him stab him don't freak out guys don't freak out calm down calm down it's okay I'll get your friend back he just might have PTSD okay what's that I think I hear Jorge want some drugs no I don't hola I'm selling drugs hola Jorge all right Jorge introduce yourself to the class okay hi kids I'm J and I'm a drug deer you must have a small peee no I don't man wa calm down calm down all right jge show the class what you brought in today I brought drugs man okay are you proud of bringing in those drugs yeah man this is great man and you're not worried that you're going to be uh caught by the police why are you a police officer no I'm I'm not a police officer okay I will leave you officer go man okay all right so right now are you in possession of illegal drugs yeah man get on get on the table get on the table resisant class somebody want to volunteer and uh assist me today oh oh I'll help you officer Goodman what do you want me to do goodness what do you want me to do I need you to calm him down while I get these handcuffs on you done hey stop being a bad person I'm not man I'm a drug dealer man well that's bad all right I got the cffs on you go back to your seat thanks for your help okay all right jge stand up oh man all you're going to jail not again man well don't do the crime if you can't do the what whatever come on yeah all right stay right here until the end of class and I'll come get you okay all right man all right class that concludes the drug portion of the lecture we are now going to go to sexual harrassment in the classroom okay so let me pull down the screen here and we'll get started all right class this is going to be sexual harassment by me officer Goodman okay so now we're going to talk about sexual harassment in the classroom all right class the number one thing people claim the sexual harassment in the classroom are girls boobies okay they say oh your boobies look nice well these right here are boobies okay but in school it's a face okay so don't say boobies oh that makes perfect sense now it's a face I like your face Cecilia yes good little mushroom fell he's got the right idea so anybody have any questions about the face okay my mom has a pretty big face oh dude you should bring her into class one day now on the penis okay all right class a female can sexually harass a male as much as she wants okay but the one thing she cannot do is say penis a good substitute for the word penis is PE PE so I'm going to draw a penis okay so this right here is a penis okay but in school it's an elephant okay so you have his body and his feet okay and you know what's underneath an elepant right nice okay peanuts okay that peanuts other than anything elephant any questions oh cool I'm going tell my dad that I have an elephant no I have a really small elephant oh dude you got a small pee peee man it's a medical disorder all right class that concludes my lecture for today okay oh well it appears that my shoes have been stolen does anybody know where my shoes went I think it was because when I released Bubbles from the handcuffs he stole my shoes typical black person okay all right that concludes my lecture so don't say boobies don't say penis and don't do drugs I'm going to go get your teacher so all you sit tight right here come on Jorge I didn't forget about you a damn man all right come on come on Bing Bong all right crass uh everyone have fun I was at Kim nail getting my nail done my wife Nam it Kim you ready to runn crass all right CR are you ready to R Kaku Ras ah D we only got 1 minute R in Crash that's time for one kakur Rus problem before we [Music] go Charlie and friends was filmed in front of a live audience oh hi guys I'm Charlie and I'm late for class I need to hurry up and get there oh Charlie you're late oh man you you're funny Antics I swear hi guys I'm Charlie and I'm late because you dumb ass [ __ ] all right crash tomorrow is show and tell so bring something you want to show and tell about but but wait what about the homework D shut up oh thank you for reminding me your homework for tonight is to do 100 calculus problems and bring it to me tomorrow for credit any questions yeah yeah yeah I got a question uh well it's not really a question it's more like a statement my school homework we all do homew okay then 200 culus problem for you because you die you're free to [Music] go all right guys let's get back to work everybody in position what's the point in working working today we're all going to die how about you just kill yourself well what if I do anger stop being mean to sadness whatever all right guys assume your position let's wake him up morning time all right guys let's go find daddy I'm going find Daddy hey Daddy what doing good morning Jeffy um are you hungry Jeffy Jeffy are you hungry hungry Jeffy are you hungry all right guys he uh he wants to know if we're hungry are we hungry I don't even know I don't even know I I guess we don't even know let's tell them Jeffy just answer me are you hungry I don't even know Jeffy if you don't choose something to eat you're going to have to eat green beans [ __ ] we ain't eating green beans I don't want to eat green beans they're gross well guys if we don't pick something he's going to make us eat green beans what's the point even eating we're all going to die shut up sadness I want to stick my peee in some Cheerios good idea anger let's stick our peee in some Cheerios Jeffy just choose something to eat what do you want to eat Daddy I want to stick my peee and some Cheerios you're not sticking your peee and Cheerios why I have to know why yeah why why why can we not stick our pee peee in a Cheerio box ask him why let's ask him why Daddy because you're not going to do that Jeff no Daddy I want to know why why can't I put my baby in a cherium because it's gross Jeff let's just go to the kitchen come on Jeffy stop that since you didn't choose anything to eat you have to eat green beans we are so [ __ ] but we don't like green beans this guy is starting to make me mad I don't know how many times I have to tell him we don't like green beans let's tell them again but Daddy I don't like green beans I know you don't like green beans Jeffy but you have to eat them so open up R aler red aler we have green beans coming right towards us what do we do thr the pl throw that plate but Daddy's going to be mad do you not see what's coming right towards us launch the plate come on Jeffy eat your green beans Jeffy why'd you do that all right all right guys we dodged a bullet on that one good work but what are we going to eat now let's ask for 17 pancakes 17 we can't eat 17 let's ask for it anyway 17 is a perfect amount I I like 17 pancakes but that's too many all right all in favor of 17 pancakes raise your hand man oh that looks like two against one let's ask for 17 pancakes Jeffy look at the mess you made D I want 17 pancakes you're not getting 17 pancakes no Daddy but I want to eat 17 pancakes well you're not going to get 17 pancakes all right guys well uh Daddy's arguing with us so uh let's make chicken noises Jeffy you're not getting 17 pancakes that's it Jeffy you get no pancakes is he [ __ ] high this guy is starting to make me mad he must be [ __ ] hot I'm going to have to hit the button no I'm going to hit the button NOP no pancakes for Jeffy are you [ __ ] high daddy [ __ ] you I want pancakes right [ __ ] now I want pancakes I want pancakes I want pancakes I want here's your cat piano play a song great now let's play a song Let's play the most annoying song we can think of how about we just stay really quiet shut up all right Jeffy move your piano here's your pancakes Jeffy where uh where uh where the marshmallows guys oh no no marshmallows this guy just try to give us pancakes without marshmallows flip the plate flip the plate hold on hold on let's not jump to any conclusions here let's uh let's be civilized and ask him where the marshmallows are um dadd where's the marshmallows we don't have marshmallows Jeffy flip the plate yes Jeffy why would you do that whoa guys hold on hold on hold on we're receiving a message from the uh from the lower intestine here it says uh we need to poop and the closest place that we can make it to is the kitchen sink poop in the sink yeah poop in the sink we can't poop in the sink that'll get mad well we only got 10 seconds 10 nine Jeffy you made a mess with the green bead and now the pancakes what's wrong with you what I have to poop you have the poop 8 7 6 Jeffy don't poop you can hold it make it make it the bathroom no Daddy the sink no no the bathroom DD 5 4 come on Jeffy just hold it I'm not going to make it Daddy 3 2 when we just [ __ ] ourself all right Jeffy we're here use the toilet D it's too late I already pooped my pants you already pooped your pants well guys uh we didn't make it but uh we'll get it next time we'll get it next time daddy that's that Jeffy today you've been a bad boy what did he say he uh he said were a bad boy no he did not yes he did s calm down calm down calm down no he [ __ ] lost his [ __ ] stop stopy stop if you stop crying I'll buy you a toy later just just go play or something all right guys let's do the usual and spank our diaper for 7 hours straight who wants to start who me me me me me all right go [Music] ahead whoa whoa guys what is that I don't know what that is but I want to rub my pee on it be be careful let's check it out oh sorry Jeffy I didn't mean to hit you what is that Junior oh this is my balloon a bon can i r my PE PE on no but you want to pop it with a knife yeah all right here take this knife and pop it that scared the [ __ ] out of me he lost his [ __ ] again uh [Music] Jeffy what's wrong Jeffy Daddy I popped a balloon and it made a sound you popped a balloon and it made a sound yeah dad that's what happens Jeffy no Daddy not this time this time I said Jeffy let me get in your butt and I said no Mr Bon please don't get my butt Jeffy it's your bedtime put your PJs on all right guys it's time to put on our jammies but uh before we do anybody in the midle listen hop hop oh I am I am all right how many times should we listen to it 20 20 times 20 20 times yeah let's do it oh hop hop hop we just go to bed do hop hop h hop like they always do hop hop hop like a bunny do and hop hopity hop hop all right Jeffy are you finally ready to go to sleep all right guys we're uh we're all ready for bed let's let them know oh am I Daddy see I got my carrots on and my bunny suit on I'm R B all right Jeffy well good night good night Dad all right guys well uh that concludes our day so uh let's go to bed wait hold on who's taking the night shift oh I I will all right great what if a monster poops in our jammies oh don't worry I'll let Daddy know all right great good night oh yeah I'm in control now okay so I just put Jeffy in bed and everything's good no no somebody pooped in my jammies nobody pooped in your jammies Jeffy no Daddy they did they said I'm going to get Jeffy in trouble I'm going to poop in his jammies and they dumped him on jammies Daddy and they pooped you pooped at them Jeffy no I didn't daddy so uh whose idea was it to adop him I hate washing dishes B's favorite cup let me make sure don't get any scratches on it you got to make sure it's very clean oh Angry Birds oh I swear cleaning never ends wait junior is this your bowl of fruit rops I'm sorry said i c in my eye I'm sorry you bastard why were you throwing a ball in the house anyway why did you throw it in a cereal well I didn't get my ball on the cereal the cereal got on my ball what the hell are you talking about Junior well I I thought I was Tom Brady and you were wide open so I threw it to you you just you just can't catch you suck oh my God Tom Brady are you serious Tom Brady you had a basketball I would have understood if you said LeBron James or maybe Chris Bosch maybe even Kevin Durant but but Tom Brady which Tom bra is my hero and you can't catch you suck Chef peee oh my God I I could strangle you right now you know how many poor African starving African kids would eat this cereal they would die for this cereal the stupid fruity loes right here they would die for the cereal yes that's pretty stupid they get out of Africa what what anyway my ball is really dirty chpi can you clean it no I'm not going to clean your ball after you thrw a cereal clean it Chef peee do you know what you just did what oh you're in a heap of trouble now you just broke your dad's favorite cup you mean you broke it what the hell you mean I broke it you broke it no I didn't you broke it how did I break it well you know if you would have caught the ball when I threw it to you and it wouldn't have gotten my cereal it wouldn't have gotten dirty and I wouldn't have told you to clean it and I wouldn't have thrown it over there so you broke it junor just set the hell up you're [ __ ] all your examples and reasons does not make any sense but you know what I'm not even going to sit and argue with you you're going to tell your dad exactly what you did let's go yeah let's go Charlie and friends was filmed in front of a live audience got to poop got to poop oh hi guys I'm Charlie and today I have to poop but there's someone in the bathroom please come out whoever's in the bathroom I'm sorry I'm taking a cup well how am I going to use the bathroom I really got a poop I know I use the litter box if cat can do it I can too isn't that right Mr Kitty you want to use it with [Applause] [Music] me oh man Charlie you know how to make me laugh go go keep walking I don't want to tell him no you're going to tell your dad you're going to tell him exactly what you did Dad what do you want don't you see I'm watching Charlie at friends uh yeah you're busy you're right uh yep I am I'll tell you later no you're telling him now tell him um Dad I got to tell you something really important what is it is food ready no it's not food it's um um tell him um I went potty all by myself what stop lying no Bowser he did not go to the potty by himself he barely even knows how to go to the potty look he wanted to play Tom Brady in the house so he threw the ball in the house and broke your favorite cup wait you broke my favorite cup no why were you thought oh no should be throwing in the house you no better than that you know better than that I dare you you stupid little boy where's my belt where's my belt no just wait just wait I got the good belt too no Dad it's not my fault can't you ever throw in my house again what is wrong with you Jor you're not Tom Brady you don't have four free don't to ever go in my house again do you hear me now do you hear me now yes I do yeah you better whine that's a good weapon I need a pat on the back I hate that my dad beat me I hate it I hate it I hate you dad I hate you stupid dad I'm going to call 911 that's what I'm going to do I'm going to call the police and tell them that my dad's been beating me please open up oh that must be the police officer hello mister did you call 911 about your dad beating you yes I did yes I did he beat me all the time you see my bruises uh I don't see any bruises where where did he hit you son he hit me on my face and my arms and everywhere M yeah no I don't see any bruises so you can't arrest him no I don't I did not witness him beating you and I don't see any bruises on your body so I cannot arrest him at the moment well can can you at least go tell him that if he does beat me that he'll go to jail forever please because I don't want him to hit me anymore yeah I'll talk to him where's he at he's in his room all right Charlie you and your silly Shenanigans Hey sir can I speak with you oh my God it's the Bas what are you doing here I didn't give you permission to search my house well uh your son let me in and uh yeah he said that he were uh you were beating him oh is that true no no that is preposterous I would never beat put my hands on my child I love him too much well sir I know it's hard to believe I know but but there are adults out there who beat their kids what and I'm here to tell you that's crazy who would do that I have no idea but I'm here to tell you that if you beat your child that's illegal and I I will take you personally to jail you you got to be kidding right like when when has this been illegal it's it's always been the losser I mean like I've always beat my child and I never got in trouble for it before oh so you just ad to beating your child I mean I mean like uh whoopings discipline the the good stuff you know what I mean right no anyway all I'm saying is you cannot put your hands on your child you can you can uh yell and and scream and if he says a bad word wash his mouth out with soap or if he does something bad put him in the corner for 5 or 10 minutes or so but you are not allowed to beat your kid good well okay I don't see how that is going to discipline him though what is that going to really do what is it going to prove it builds character guess so do not let me come back here to this house okay I can't beat him no corner or soap in the mouth okay all right yes sir you might want to apologize to him I think you heard his what apologize for what apparently beating him he his his feelings are really hurt he called the police he's a little kid all right I'm I'm out dear I'll apologize oh stupid big meanie dad stupid mean he's going to be so funny Junior I would like to say I'm sorry cuz I know I was kind of harsh on you the first what the hell is this um I'm drawing on the wall I drew your big mean stupid face oh you know what I know how to solve this I'll go and get the bill dang it what um you know what even better uh go and stand in the corner what yeah go and stand in the corner what's the corner what's that mean go I'll show you come and stand in the corner go Junior go stand in the corner right over there that corner yeah that corner right there why um because you've been a bad boy okay breaking my favorite glass and all that turn around oh oh okay so what what do I do um you stay there look at that wall why um because I said so that's why okay what what is this going to prove it's going to prove that you've been a bad boy um okay uh H how long do I stand here how long does you stand here uh 5 minutes yeah okay um all right uh um what what have I to go pee turn around oh um whatever I have to go pee well you pee on yourself then or wait 5 minutes I hope you wait you going to learn today um Bowser what is Junior doing oh um he's just standing in the corner but for what because he drew the wall and he broke my cup oh yeah he broke my cup but what is it supposed to prove I don't see how this is a punishment that's what I said shut up Junior sorry this is so stupid how long have I been here a little over a minute a little over a minute and I have to spend 5 minutes in this hell hole yep I hope you enjoy it oh this is so stupid it's not going to do anything oh dear God it's starting to get to me I'm going to go insane oh it's like a never ending corner I'm getting claustrophobic I think I'm going to throw up Dad I think I'm going to throw up shut up Junior I'm trying to watch hi guys I'm [Music] Charlie oh God I'm boxed in oh God I don't feel good oh my god oh I hate the corner oh God oh God I can't take it anymore I can't take it [Music] anymore oh man that was a funny episode of Charlie and friends all right Junior it's time to get out of the corner um Junior I know you hear me Junior Junior what what do you want um it's time to get out of corner Junior no come on get out of the corner your time is up the 5 minutes is up I don't want to leave the corner this is my whole life now Julian what the hell are you talking about you you've only been in the corner for 5 minutes what are you talking about I've changed Dad this is the new me how did you change in 5 minutes so standing in the I've seen things Dad I've seen things you've only seen drywall dad just just let me stay here this is my whole life now Junior if you don't come out of the damn Corner look you can play with your toys now look at all these little beautiful toys you used to play with all the time your Pony and your train I don't want to play with these anymore what I want to go back to the corner no no Junior you're going to play with your toys right now h fine I guess I'll play with Thomas yeah choo choo I know you're enjoying it who Could That Be it's probably my stupid friends y what's up Junior yeah hi Junior what do y'all want whoa what happened to you dude uh I spent 5 minutes in the corner 5 minutes in the corner y oh that's a major time bro yeah I got tatted up oh look at this yeah see look at my tat Thug Life wa dude that's cool yeah my man Mac hooked me up I got to admit dude those are hardcore tach yeah yeah I had some serious time in the corner I'm a changed man y'all want to come inside yeah it's freezing out here dude okay um so Junior what are we going to play today well we can play trains I call Thomas okay oh look I have to say this junior what has happened you seem weird something changed yeah y'all guys don't understand what the corner did to me it changed me I'm a changed man I get it I get it the corner you don't get it Joseph you don't get it until you spend 5 minutes of your life that you can never get back out of the corner the constant crease The Never Ending crease in the corner the popcorn drywall wondering why it can't be so smooth they just eat at you it eat at you it eat at you you go crazy the constant silence the constant wonder if I don't know what time it is I don't have a clock to look at okay when is my time going to end when's my eyes going to end God damn it when is it going to end what is it going to end Junior what is going on in here what's with this big mess um i i o you're in trouble now you're going to the corner I don't care I want to go back you don't care you coming with me you get in that corner and it's for 10 minutes this time it ain't nothing new this is my home anyway um hi Junior uh we came to visit um Junior I used to think you were cool but now you're just sick you need help junior junior come on speak to us Junior y'all are just telling me stuff I already know look Junior I don't know if we could be friends with you anymore if you keep going down this this sick path that you're headed on yeah it doesn't matter you can't change me the corner made me this way and I'm going to stay like this for the rest of my life no helping him Cody well look your dad said that we have to go home so I guess we'll see you tomorrow bye-bye Junior don't let the door hit you on the way out all right Junior your 10 minutes were're up Junior what the hell are you doing come here junior what the hell is wrong with you why were you hang yourself dad the Corner's too much Dad what are you talking about the corner it's too much you're insane Junior I don't give a damn what did you just say I don't give a damn I'mma beat you you know what I'mma just wash your mouth out with so that's what I'mma do oh so you like to cuss I'll teach you how to cuss then watch that dirty mouth of yours how do you like soap D tastes good doesn't it oh yeah yeah taste the bubbles taste the bubbles tell me what the cut word do you have

Channel: SML Remix

Views: 4,818

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Id: Lepz8Dmt4jU

Length: 138min 13sec (8293 seconds)

Published: Sat Feb 17 2024