your personal statement sucks

so this is going to be a pretty Niche video for maybe like five people who happen to be subscribed to me and also happen to be applying to something that requires a personal statement but but sadly I I saw a tweet and now now I want to talk about it I'm sorry before I get into the tweet I should State very clearly that this video is going to toe the line on advice for applying to graduate school which I need to tell you right away do not take advice on applying to graduate school you need to talk to like 10 people like your undergraduate advisor your research advisors talk to current grad students talk to people who apply to the program you want to go to last year and find out what they did and take all the advice from all those people including losers on YouTube apply it to your specific personal situation because everybody is different everybody is applying to different programs they have different backgrounds like I am just trying to avoid the comments on this video where they're like well actually I didn't need a research statement for graduate school so why are you spreading misinformation about graduate school and I just so the tweet I am off Twitter and that I stopped tweeting in November and I kind of just look at it not nearly as often as I used to so now when I see a tweet I just respond to people in real life like have you seen this ridiculous tweet that's what this is right now isn't that embarrassing am I the worst here's the tweet it's not the real tweet I I don't want to like shame someone for tweeting I that's the worst part of Twitter is that it makes me mean and I don't want to be a mean person and I don't want to be a mean person so I am not going to shame this man and put it on a YouTube video that maybe 200 people will see when he only has like 200 followers on like this tweet isn't that serious he doesn't deserve to be canceled over this bad take it's fine like it's fine so I'm just gonna give you a facility of that tweet here it is dear astrophysics graduate student applicants please note that saying you looked up at the stars as a child is not nearly as interesting as you think it is signed a new Prof that's the tweet I want to make this more General so like if you're applying to astrophysics graduate school you would say I looked up at the stars as a child if you're applying to film School you would say I was enchanted by the cinematography of The Lord of the Rings movies if you're applying to Dinosaur School you would say as a child I had a formative experience at a museum where I thought I was digging for real bones but it was just like an activity and on and on and on just like the general stereotype of a person who is really interested and excited and has been talking about going into this field for a long time whatever that would be every time I say looking at to the Stars just imagine that for your field and he's suggesting that it's not original to say this because as someone who has set on those committees and look through applications I want to say like 90 of personal statements have two paragraphs of the two-page limit dedicated to my interest and thing as a child and it's just it's bad it's a it sucks it's not a good personal statement I don't want to be a mean person and of course because it's Twitter everyone just read this in the the most cruel way possible and it went viral for astrophysics academic Twitter standards meaning I saw like eight people quote tweet it with like their hot takes and those hot takes kind of ranged from like old men being like graduate school is too easy these days why are they writing personal statements instead of taking exams all the way to like how dare you make fun of these these children who just want to go to graduate school how dare you they don't know their little babies and with all things on Twitter the the truth the real answer the real hot take which I deem myself completely 100 able to give and be correct is somewhere in the middle so like obviously this guy is wrong graduate school has never been harder to get into these Stakes are never higher than right now like some schools are requiring like first author papers like Publications to get into graduate school that's insane that's messed up it's never been harder to get into graduate school and secondly graduate students are not children graduate school is a job they are applying to a job this is also wrong in the middle is where the answer is first I don't think it's very nice to mock these students these job applicants on Twitter the people who write bad personal statements are always going to be your first generation students your International students people who maybe English isn't their first language or they are the very first person in their entire family that they know of to go to school and they want to apply to graduate school but they don't really know what it is they don't know how to do it and when they look on the applicant website and it says write a personal statement they think of course I'll write a personal essay about my life in relation to topic so if you are applying to astrophysics graduate school you would talk about how you were interested in space as a small child that makes sense it's incorrect that's not what a personal statement is but it makes sense that people would think that and I think it's not nice to make fun of them but also also this hot take of being annoyed by this like it's valid I have been in these rooms where you are going through 400 applications with the committee to get that number down to 10 applications which means you literally have to read 400 personal statements where 386 of them are like their childhood story and it's just it's inappropriate it's not what's supposed to be in a personal statement and it's not good so in this video I'm going to explain why that's not good and I hope to not make a habit on making videos about tweets because that's just that's so pathetic in order to explain why your personal statement sucks I need you to put yourself in the shoes of the people who make the decision you get 400 applications you have 10 spots and maybe like 12 wait lists that you're gonna extend so you are sitting in a small conference room with like usually something like two graduate students a postdoc and like three or four associate professors because like the tenured professors would never and you're all gonna read the things beforehand and then like discuss and just chop down the lists until you get 10 and like you want to be done by 5 PM you send in seven things in your application so you send them a hundred dollars scam uh three reference letters a CV a research statement and a personal statement seven things and that's it that's all you are to this group of people and here I would like to remind you some people had different things when they were applying to graduate school and that's okay and that's fine just breathe it's okay if every video is not 100 accurate to your expectations and if you had a different experience leave a comment below tell us about your field and how it was different I applied to physics graduate school I've been on committees for physics and astrophysics graduate school applications that is what I know I bet you could extend it to your situation while keeping in mind that it's Unique for everybody okay just breathe it's okay if the world isn't catered to your exact lived experience it's fine okay the seven things first of all let's talk about this hundred dollars that's a mess right what's that hundred dollars for in the past it used to be like we take that hundred dollars and we use that pot to fly the 10 accepted students out and show them the campus and do like some soft interviews and like introduce them to the labs and I'd be curious how that cost that much money like if you get 400 applications at a hundred dollars each how much are 10 flights but they're not flying the international students in and that's like half so how much are five flights and they're not paying for hotels because they ask the current graduate students to host them in their homes like that's a normal thing like I'm supposed to invite a stranger from Nebraska into my home just because they got accepted to graduate school like I'm happy to go to dinner am I supposed to make them sleep on my couch in my studio apartment do you know how much you pay me as a graduate student I'm supposed to host someone that is a mess I never did that but people did I can't believe they even ask that is insane but since covet they've been offering like a zoom interview option so like where's the money going I understand that they they put a hundred dollar price tag on the application because if they didn't have that like barrier to entry every single student would apply to every single program just in case they happen to get in and you would get all these lousy mediocre applications that no one spent any time on you wouldn't really know who actually wants to come to the program so like you you pay a hundred dollars to show that you want to go for real but it's kind of messed up and also because as you'll see it's kind of just a random Lottery that means the rich people who can afford to apply to like 27 programs get like 27 golden tickets and like one chance to get in whereas if you're poor you like have to pick your top three and you only get three golden tickets and that's not fair I don't like that we're sitting in our conference room we have 400 applications we want to cut this down to 10. cancel 100 there's six documents left you start looking at the CV and making Cuts so this is where you'll see like a GPA cut like everybody with below a 3.0 is out of the pile and I'm not saying you cut a 3.0 it would be different each year it would be different what program like medical school I think you have to get a 4.0 I've never seen anyone in any of these rooms I've been in like debating if someone with a 3.6 is as good as a 4.0 like nobody cares as long as it's above some thresholds um you start cutting if people have Majors that don't really align like you apply to a Linguistics program but you have a chemistry degree that doesn't make sense or like it could even be up to things that aren't even in your control like maybe they just hired three new assistant professors that do condensed matter Theory so they need a bunch of graduate students that are interested in condensed matter Theory to fill those labs so when you write your application even if it's perfect if your CV has like this huge background in like Atomic experiment physics they're going to be like oh we don't want this person right so you go through whatever your program's looking for that year and you toss out the applications that don't fit that based on the CV and through that you'll lose like a hundred right so now you have 300 applications for 10 spots you've gone through the CV that doesn't matter anymore all of these 300 people have a good CV they all have the good background like it's fine next thing you look at are the reference letters and reference letters are really annoying because sometimes they're like three pages long when really they could be yes or no statements right you ask for a strong letter of recommendation and the person writes this long flowing letter about how you're so exceptional and you're so much stronger than your peers mathematically and if you're a woman they'll write about what a good team worker you are and how nice you are laughs so those are either yes or no right like a no reference letter looks like I had Colin for chemistry 107 in the spring of 2022 and he received a b-plus like that means Colin didn't have anyone to ask he asked a random Professor he had and that Professor was like I can't really write you a strong letter because I don't really remember you but I will write what I know I guess and Colin is like yeah I guess and that's a no right so you go through all the reference letters you throw out all the people who for some reason asked a professor whose course they cheated in to write them a reference letter and the professor is like oh yes I will write you a reference letter he cheated or he got fired from my lab or she was not a very good student and those people get thrown out um so as I said the reference letters though they're either yes or no like there's no frilly flowerful beautiful wonderful written reference letter that would make someone go this person automatically gets in unless someone really super famous wrote your letter nepotism next the CV knocked out like a hundred people the reference letters knock out like 50 because most people know to ask for strong letters and most professors are honest enough people to be like I will not write you a strong letter and if a professor says that to you say thank you so much for telling me and find someone else so you have 250 applications left for 10 spots and you only have two documents left right your research statement and your personal statement what you look at next in my personal opinion is the most important document in your application which is the research statement usually like three pages long you detail the research you did in undergrad and you kind of wrap that and weave that into a beautiful little statement of what you want to do in graduate school and why these specific program you are applying to you must write this specifically for each application is the one for you so you need to research the website and look at the labs and make lots of factually correct statements about the work you have personally done and the work you want to do I say factually correct because saying something stupid in your research statement even though it's like an honest mistake and it can happen to anybody will get your application tossed if you accidentally say something like I used the Chandra x-ray Observatory to look at Radio wavelengths it'll be like that doesn't make any sense or if you say I did this laser experiment to look at electrons in the nucleus that doesn't make any sense you don't even understand what you did throw it out and I think this is where most people get thrown out because they don't have their advisors read their research statements or sometimes people will reference research that doesn't even happen at the program they're applying to like like imagine you are applying to a like ecology biology program and you want to work with animal habitats and you just talk and talk and talk about how you love big apes and you're so excited to like work with linguists sticks and chimpanzees and like their habitats and you're applying to this school that only has dolphins and they're like why would she write this giant application about apes when we don't have any Apes why would she apply here she won't be happy here throw it out like it doesn't matter what your other documents look like your application does not make sense so this is where most people get thrown out have your undergraduate advisor read your research statement it's the most important thing next we're down to 50 people okay we started with 400 people we are down to 50. all 50 of these applications are awesome like they have good CVS they have good letters that say yes and their research statement was interesting and accurate and they are all talking about research they will do at this program any one of those 50 people would be a great candidate for this program and this is why I said it's like a numbers game any one of these 50 people would be great they would do great work they would be doing great work they would be acceptable graduate students to finish the program and produce research for the University right they would be fine at this point in my personal opinion I think you should just do the lottery system um but that's not what happens you read a personal statement that is your last document you have made it to the top 50. your application is perfect you have your last moment to impress upon the committee that you are an amazing candidate for this program not only is this program perfect for you you will enhance this program you will be a great students and you have two pages to do this and you've chosen to spend two paragraphs of these two pages a third of these two pages talking about how when you were a kid you liked space I would very specifically like to say I do not think this will count against you no one's gonna be like this loser like space tossed them out but it doesn't add anything you have these two pages to shine to be an exciting interesting candidate and you said you liked space when you were a kid I don't know how to impress upon you that in the group of the 50 best applicants to an astrophysics program every single one of those people like space you liking space is just a fact it's not interesting it's not really evidence that you would be a good candidate for this program because all these people like space as I said generalize this you're applying to film School all of those people liked Steven Spielberg you're applying to volcano school all of those people volcanology all of those people did a volcano experiment in second grade with baking soda and stuff you know it's just it's nothing it's like those people who can't get dates and they're like I don't understand why I can't get a date I'm nice and it's just like nice as the floor everybody's nice what else do you have everybody likes space what else do you have and that's what I mean when I say this sucks like you've already made it so far into this application process you are one of the top candidates and only one in five people is gonna get a yes and you did not use these two pages wisely you did not say why you're a good candidate I would really quickly like to Rapid Fire some other things you shouldn't say in a personal statement because again this is a job application and this is not a personal essay so do not talk about your boyfriend or your girlfriend and where they're planning to go to graduate school saying something like my girlfriend applied to the University of Cincinnati law school so I would like to go to this physics department doesn't add to your application all it says is like okay but if your girlfriend gets into the University of Louisville's law school y'all are moving to Kentucky because why would you be in Ohio when you could be in Kentucky am I right [Music] that looks bad in your personal statement because it's like well maybe this guy doesn't really want to go here he just wants to go wherever his girlfriend goes for the same reason don't talk about the location like don't say like I want to go to the school because I really like skiing it just doesn't add anything the personal statement needs to be about you personally and also the program you're applying to um I'm gonna say something controversial I don't think you should mention like any family issues or mental health struggles I'm not saying that it's bad to have them and I don't even think it would negatively affect your application but again it doesn't add anything to it I don't think your depression is going to affect your graduate school experience but I also don't think your employer is necessarily need to see it on a job application it it doesn't take away anything but it also doesn't add anything to your application you know what I mean like if you are going to need accommodations when you get into graduate school that's fine you deserve those get those but after you've been accepted is the time to talk about them if that makes sense I stand by it I just personally in my personal opinion for me personally I don't think that stuff is appropriate for a personal statement on a job application okay so now here we are you're still in the top 50 and your your personal statement is clean now it's two pages of blank and you're probably saying what the hell do I write in this and what is a personal statement and to that I would say I don't know I don't like them I don't think they should exist I already said at this point I think there is no difference in doing a lottery system like are we seriously just going on Vibes like who seems chill who seems fun I don't think any of that stuff actually determines how good you will be as a graduate student I don't like these I don't know what they are abolish the personal statement but that's not a good way to end a video where I said I would toes in line on advice so let me tell you some things I have seen in personal statements that worked that were good that enhanced an application because that's what you want to do by the time people are judging your personal statement for vibes you have already proven that you are a good candidate so you just need to enhance that application here are some things um people use personal statements to explain like bad gpas or interesting Majors like again I don't think you should talk about like family struggles or mental health issues but saying something like I had a really rough semester sophomore year due to personal issues you can see I've recovered from that and I've gotten A's in all my major courses since then but that explains why my GPA is so well perfect if you are an art major applying for a chemistry program you need to spend a paragraph explaining why your interest in art is attached to your interest in chemistry and oh by the way if you look at my attached transcript you'll see that I took all the chemistry classes and then it's like oh that's actually really interesting it's not it's not an odd major to apply for a chemistry program it's it's interesting um some advice I received in graduate school that I thought was really helpful your mileage may vary this is just like my opinion man was to act in Academia like the level above where you are like you know dress for the job you want so when I was a graduate student I was acting like a postdoc like I was making my own research contacts without my advisor being involved I was starting to do my own projects write my own papers and then as a postdoc I was acting like a professor like I was teaching courses I was getting grants so if we extend that advice to being an undergrad act like a graduate student start taing for courses if you can start doing Outreach if you can and talk about that stuff in your personal statement talk about your teaching skills talk about how you did an Outreach event for elementary schoolers and you really like doing that and oh by the way I saw that on the program website you guys have this Outreach group that I would love to join it just shows that you did your research about the specific program you're applying to and the things you want to do why you're a good candidate so it doesn't mean you can't talk about your childhood at all no I mean if you have a really interesting background like if you are the first person from your small town in Sri Lanka to come to America and go to graduate school and you are going to get a Physics degree so you can go back and be the first physics teacher at that small Rural High School because in the past everyone had to go to the town to get physics like that's really interesting and exciting like oh what an interesting background perfect um I was actually thinking about the difference in like someone who's like in high school I was really interested in string theory and I read Michio Kaku books right like that's not interesting like everyone who's interested in physics as a high school student read popular science books but you can compare that to Michio Kaku who is rumored to in high school have built a particle accelerator in his garage like that that's interesting that shows some technical skills that is a thing you would put in a personal statement about a thing you did as a child but just reading books is like not that interesting we all do that right yeah so your mileage may vary follow your own dreams take lots of people's advice except not like your mom's take advice on being an academic from people who have experienced Academia like your random uncle is gonna tell you to just just call the department chair and tell them you're interested in the school drop off a resume and that's bad advice only the real ones stay till the end so I'm gonna give one last it's advice I hate giving advice this is the only video I will ever do on graduate school advice which is why I want to say if you get accepted to graduate school you need to be paid a stipend you do not pay for graduate school classes you get paid okay there there's like two types of graduate school right like there's training programs like Medical School veterinary school library science and lots lots more like education school where law school right where you do this school and then you take some sort of certification exam and you become a thing those you usually pay for I'm talking about over here if you do research if you work for the University you need to be paid for that work so like science physics philosophy English if you're getting an art restoration degree that that's a training program but if you're getting an art history degree and you are doing research you need to be paid so if your acceptance letter does not list you will be funded for five years and you will receive a stipend of this much you did not get in it's a scam they are scamming you into paying for graduate school to support the people they actually want there by paying them that sounds really mean to say but it's true um this this philosophy school was like oh sorry you didn't get into our PhD program but you can attend this master's program that's like a different a different Masters and it was like a scam like they phrased the letter like well if you pay for this two-year Master's Degree for three hundred thousand dollars maybe eventually you could get into the PHD program except literally no one ever got into the PhD from the master's program and the master's program just funded the PHD program that's a mess that's a scam that's upsetting can you imagine applying for a PhD and they're like no but you can do a masters no you applied for a PhD I'm gonna tell you a really embarrassing story when I was finishing my PhD so like before I even was a postdoc I applied for a bunch of postdocs but also some faculty jobs at like small like Community College like small schools where I was like I would be a good candidate for this like it's not a big R1 it's like a small school and I did okay and I got one like a phone interview and they were like great job come out for the interview and it was 2019 so it was before and I did all the whole in-person interview with the 30 minute meetings and I gave the talk and I taught at example class and didn't hear anything didn't hear anything and I was like I guess I didn't get that job that's okay because I took a cool post-doc and since I didn't hear anything which is how it goes like you just they just ghost you even though they met you and shook your hand like whatever eight months later like I'm in a postdoc I have moved across the country they sent me an email and in the email it was like Angela thank you so much for coming to our interview and it's like babe it was eight months ago but whatever and they said we interviewed three people and you happen to be our third choice which like that's not very nice you could just say I didn't get it you don't need to tell me what number I was but like fine and then they said I regret to inform you the position has been canceled so like they've lost the funding for the position they were not gonna hire anybody and it's like fine you didn't need to tell me I was third place for a job that doesn't exist anymore that is not nice and then further down in the email they said but we would encourage you to apply for this position and I was like why would they want me if I was third place and I clicked on it and it was a part-time adjunct position teaching one class contract so for one semester for three hundred dollars a credit hour which is nine hundred dollars I actually didn't apply to be an adjunct I applied to be an assistant professor how dare you respond to my application being like or you can apply for this much less prestigious position for way way way less money and no job security not nice what a blow to my confidence good thing I was already in a postdoc can you imagine if I hadn't gotten any job and I got that letter just like oh I guess that's where I'm at oh it was in Ohio [Music]

Channel: Angela Collier

Views: 112,530

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Id: tz42lx6BhqY

Length: 31min 47sec (1907 seconds)

Published: Sat Feb 18 2023