Your Mom's House Podcast - Ep. 484 w/ Yoshi & Redban

this episode of your mom's house is brought to you by satva luxury mattress the only online mattress company that provides free delivery setup and mattress removal [Music] [Music] today's episode is sponsored by better help go to better help calm / ymh to get started today christina and i both huge fans of counselling therapy if you will we both have been doing it for years I can't imagine a life without their to me at this point now I feel like one of the the greatest feelings in my week is that I don't know that moment when you are just done with a session and you walk out and you either feel like wow I got this off my chest I feel maybe validated about something or somebody connects the dots oh yeah not somebody your therapist helps you connect the dots in something absolutely and you just feel like this breakthrough kind of feeling it's so it's life is so short and so many people suffer with anxiety and depression and talk therapy is one of the best ways to resolve anxiety and depression yeah it really is it's important remember these are licensed therapists available worldwide you can do this via text chat phone or video and this is something that's available on your desktop mobile Android or iOS it's it's really an easy thing to get started with and you have a lot of flexibility to you can change you can figure out who you match with and you can talk to somebody within 24 hours it's a big deal you can get which is different than your normal therapist sometimes you have to wait an entire week yeah this is something that again we're we're more than happy to talk about because we we actually live this we do this I'm going this week on Thursday oh good for you I move it around even if I can't you know if I can right the party is what you're saying I have a set day but I can't make it happen that day I make sure to reach out and it is like I don't know it to me it feels almost like a cleanse in a way absolutely so I'm a huge huge fan of this there's a financial aid available but it is a quite affordable this is professional real licensed therapists there are many ways with which you can get in touch with them you can do this like we said over text chat video or phone please go to better help calm /y m/h let him know we sent you there you go all right all right all right let's do it [Music] you gotta put on my other mom glasses for this go ahead Jean I I'm pleased to announce my denver shows are sold out so we've added a late show Saturday it just went first it went on sale today so get those tickets now right now right now right now right now cuz they will move fast go to Christina P online for those ticket links and I don't even know why I'm just so excited I know Denver you're doing the like what is it a midnight show I'm doing a midnight show on Saturday at the Comedy Works downtown the comedy books downtown club which is such a wonderful venue and divestment just so excited I can't wait to see all you guys there and the writer died tour keeps on rolling February 23rd I go to West alone Springs Oklahoma at the Cherokee Casino February 28th through March 2nd Madison Wisconsin D come on your comedy club on state April 4 through 6 Minneapolis hits many sodas at the Acme comedy club may 10th and 11th Tempe Arizona Tempe improv may 31st through June 1st I'm here right here right here in sperm bank California at Phillip Harris comedy club and then June 20th through 20 seconds Washington dick come at the dick [ __ ] improv all ticket links at Cristina P on I will see you there genes alright and Eugene this is by the way Obi one yeah we haven't heard from him in a minute I'm selling it let's see I'm in Long Beach at the terrace theater okay low February 7th there's a hundred tickets left so it might be singles the next day Chumash in Santa Ynez same deal and then the next day Reno February 9th same deal so there's scattered tickets and then the following week I am in Montclair New Jersey that sold out Pittsburgh on Valentine's Day The Early Show sold out the Late Show has a few tickets remaining same deal with the next day the 15th in Cincinnati sold out the the Early Show Late Show has a few tickets left Cleveland the next day same deal and Washington DC the next day at the Warner Theatre same deal Early Show sold out last show has about a hundred tickets here's what we just added actually added it last week and didn't forgot to mention it we added a Late Show for skeezy yes a Late Show in Medford so the Boston area the chevalier theater April 28th get those tickets The Late Show has been added it is Tom Segura DICOM slashed or there's also a bunch of other shows I feel like people don't even people keep hitting me up asking me about like why don't you come to like Richmond Virginia or Kansas City Indianapolis those are all on sale they're just in May and June so go to uh Tom Segura calm slash tour and then slash wet tor tor tor tor tor yeah you can pull that volume back up thanks brother elementary school yeah that guy who the [ __ ] talks like that on tour ah [ __ ] I don't even know if I have that here your tour bus tour party I'm ready man I got got a lot to talk about oh my god there's so much to go over today we got great guests today it's gonna be a lot of fun today don't we really fun guests we have two people that we haven't had in your mom's house in a minute in a hot minute yeah and they are going to both be here it's gonna be like a throwback has going to be a celebration why don't we go you ready to start I'm doing and ready bra let's let's get let's get the show started oh just nicotine brother deer raccoon in the [ __ ] McDonald [ __ ] [ __ ] dead in the [ __ ] this [ __ ] got rabies like a [ __ ] don't bring anyone [Music] yeah I have to say I'm a little jealous I'm a little jealous that a guy can the guy with a dead raccoon can go into a McDonald the we can't I don't even want to don't get me start all my god I almost forgot Morton's Steakhouse the best steak anywhere what I was gonna say was so McDonough her dry aged beef all they got at all I mean what's your favorite one though I I believe what is the yeah way to go we were gonna discuss the difference yeah what do you what's the difference well let's get into that later but I wanted to talk about and by the way there's over eighty locations of warns look them up yeah so they I'm gonna go to the one in Denver I think as you should yeah sounds like a great pre-show or post-show meal well that's a neat part about Morton's being or maybe meet everybody there right well I'm saying the Morton sponsors and we're we are promised discounted meals at any location across the United States yeah that's true but I mean come on that's a perk baby don't want to start bragging about this mister so anyways yeah the McDonald's thing is it's a bummer right we've had to return I returned a couple of handbags I got my deposit back on the car yeah I also cancelled an order on jewelry yeah and that for you or for me no it was for me well were you gonna get it was that chain with the medallion yeah Tommy Bynes number one yeah well the good thing about jewelry is that the resale value is pretty high well I realized but you know I also I mean through therapy actually I've discussed that and learned that you know sometimes it's okay to just want something and I can afford it and get I could afford it I should say yeah just get it just treat yourself yeah well lesson learn though let's treat yourself too much listen don't have to million dollars I don't have two million dollars but I gave it back but you know what life's still good it's uh it's not like there's no other source of income you know sure we have obviously great sponsors that we love on the show we've been touring touring touring and tour touring yeah this past weekend was [ __ ] crazy I know I mean I cannot tell you what that was like it was like shooting a special every night I saw your pictures on Instagram bananas I got to tell you like thank you to everybody that came out in Oklahoma City San Antonio or were they Houston and Dallas right Poston and the full charge kicked off every show I said it so I just I just wanted to say thank you it was it was really right and I saw you you went with a tour bus you got your tour bus there's time and I I noticed that Bert was kind of showing off about his tour about well I wouldn't call his a bus I know it a minivan yeah it's like an RV kind of thing yeah it's really sad too yeah like he his bus sure has a one bathroom really yeah one one well how many did yours have well - I'm not gonna pee with the peasants in the front of us so I have my own I had my own separate shower you know I have a bad day I have my own chocolate phone set up in the back satellite Wi-Fi surround sounds like it's a whole different thing and then like he painted his name on his it's so can you think now I think this might be worse idea right the fundamental difference in personalities between I love Bert first of all he's like a brother to me right but I think the fundamental difference like if I could sum it up between you and Bert is that Bert will wrap his tour bus and a photograph of him shirtless yeah and yours is like i'ma flashed rather die right yeah like I and I honestly I'm kind of I sided with you on this thing like I can't think of a worse than to do I figured he even realized that within a week he was like this was a bad idea when like scores of people at look what you're trying to sleep at night and when they would be like oh there's a vehicle and then they're like hey wait a minute yeah there's a guy's name and face all over the thing yeah people can we come in ya know he's a crazy anyways if you want to I don't know make them feel bad hosts that we know that your bus is fake we saw you have an RV and not a bus Tom's the tour bus champ clearly your but your bus looks broke you know just like I mean if you want I don't know you don't anyway I'm gonna tell you how to act yeah yeah yeah yeah you know maybe just I don't know just showing his yeah let me ask you because I was very curious about your bus life how did you manage number two's on the bus well there's a strict pretty much rule I mean I talked to actually Brian Regan about this he owns badass tour bus he's also been touring like this like 15 years and because the rule the general rule on buses is no browning right you just you can yellow you can yellow all you want but you don't Brent unless we're talking a real level [ __ ] 10 emergency right now why is that though because what happens is the way that the technology like obvious it's a toilet so you're like why can't I brown there yeah well the way that these are set up is that like the brown smells we'll get into like the vents Mel [ __ ] it'll be taken till they yeah so it's probably in a tank but right it isn't cooking and if it's and if you took out hot one it's like it's it's not gonna be good little-known Road rules back to we did not we weren't allowed to brown on the Winnie so you have this thing where you go like straight up I told anybody on the bus I'm like don't [ __ ] on here also don't feel embarrassed to say you have to ship and then then the drivers are totally like the drivers know and they're and I go like I have a no brown policy and they're like most people that's a great talk to have with oh yeah injure oh yeah anyone's got a [ __ ] he's like I'll stop whatever you want so I could like when I told him I don't want anyone a [ __ ] he goes it would be best he's like I've done a lot of the I've done what's wrong rockers no yeah but I imagine like drunk rock star [ __ ] and die that's probably why they know how bad is barf everywhere but I asked Regan I go dude you have you own this epic tour bus yeah can you I mean isn't that kind of step with the [ __ ] rule he was like well I got like the new [ __ ] well I got I so apparently the state like if you get a tour bus built now okay you make it state-of-the-art there is technology now where he's like others like coffee grinds and a whole system where you don't have to worry about it anymore oh I see so yeah but yeah I see like when you build when you custom your new thing you can get that other level you know be really great well is if you could build a plumbing system when you flush it just shoots the poo out of the exhaust pipe yeah yeah the bus goes I think there would be some really upset motorists maybe but you could do it when there's like a bicycle tour like you know those alright ride their bike just let all your diarrhea out of the back of the bus like find those groups of bicyclists and then diarrhea keep going down anyway and they're like I don't know was a bus a bunch of [ __ ] came out of the back those guys Burt named Burt was his face yeah you have a bird's face on that less though yeah that would be cool huh speaking of Braun mmm you know last night I was getting ready we're winding down for our evening mm-hmm and then you disappeared into the bathroom and I was like are you going to make brown now and you're like no no I'm just gonna go read and then of course I I put it together that you were browning because I heard the sounds and I I started to smell the smells through the door oh you didn't and then it was so interesting because you came out and you were like alright are we can I make marital love's now linking and that's fine I'm just saying it was interesting because there was no lag time there was no refractory period between your browning and then your need to ejaculate yeah and usually like I would be like I'm gonna brown him I take cool off let the let things settle and then go sexual but not you you went straight into it well the thing was mm-hmm that Brown interrupted my sexual desires so I went upstairs like I'm ready for sex oh and then it was like hey but we kind of need to make a pizza and then I went back that's I'm seriously blown away because I didn't realize well thank you and you know what's so funny about you what is you're way more affectionate and I knew it no I knew it cuz I was like she's like we were watching Sesame Street with the kid and you're petting my head and I was like this guy wants nookie I know it cuz normally you're not that affectionate Sesame Street turns me on I wasn't I wasn't being new to no is so nasty to laugh at that bloob and don't you encourage that that is so nasty yeah that is so nasty but yeah the I notice you're nicer to me when you want you want to ejaculate that's not true I also feel like no true by the way good job last night now good job you are so gross so we're nice though last night that was them didn't fart the whole time I know and you didn't ask me to congratulate you about not farting the whole time that was cool it's a big a deal it is it oh and I also you brushed your teeth which I know is an use mouthwash yeah it's cool to tell me a guy out there that would do that before they sleep with most girls most girls yeah is that really you wouldn't do that for just road beef mm-hmm Road beef gets a rubber and no Lube yeah and you don't brush your teeth um no no no I'm like no you're getting lucky you know yeah - the that's there they're just low yeah lucky to have you that gutter dog that came in Jesus Christ I mean they [ __ ] that by the rub-rub shirts yeah those girls yeah they're great don't get me wrong I love them okay I don't put it out there like you're hooking up I'm not hooking on asti I'm not hooking up I'm letting dirty dirty girls all right so God married guys ten years kind of so sound like people so just before before it went down which laying down before the McDonald's took their money back yeah they one of our great the greatest prank caller ever as far as I'm concerned fart Simpson hands down DJ skull vomit in a prank call ah that he had done to McDonald because he had heard the the news that is our sponsor I was like before and then he sent this and then like I felt bad last week so I didn't play it but now I'm like now it's in the past right anyways it's pretty funny I'm over it now - and that's time to make fun of them yeah you want to hear the call sure he called up a burger place and then it's me as the caller oh my god here we go hey I know it sounds crazy how do you feel about working with McDonald's like free McDonald's all the time uh-huh try it out hey what else many many french fries same innovative french fries yeah cheeseburgers I like the markers what do you mean the markers are good yeah it's so good it's delicious [ __ ] yeah burnt Chrysler dude now I feel like it's gonna be a regular part of my diet you got a diet you want to die you get on a diet doesn't help where are you calling will you let will you call it from you know McDonald's you call from McDonald's yeah I got a red truck you do the answer is yeah just let McDonald's have a little [ __ ] stay would you like to order something burger is fillet of fish chicken nuggets many many french fries he just started laughing yeah yeah she like me she did she like what's your name yeah she you almost got in there with her yeah but then and then she's like cuz you just kept laughing yeah and she was over you know that somebody else no I know that's something she handed the phone her friend there was like this high were high when she's messing with that was so funny yeah that was great you're like I got a red truck okay great thank you Bart Simpson that was hardcore fine II got a fart Simpson VanCamp calm yeah I got all his prank calls it's really fantastic sounded are worded in that call I'm sorry they got a red so I didn't say it speaking of McDonald's the McDaniels is what cardi because Daniels McDaniels on her Instagram this [ __ ] guy it's really crazy he has a dead raccoon yeah inside of McDonald but some people eat raccoons in parts of this country right yeah I don't think that's a good excuse to bring a dead women maybe put it on the table and around maybe you just trapped one and yeah get any at acquitting right this guy's the guy commentating just nigut him brother deer raccoon in the [ __ ] me down he's right he's the sensible one is the one who is actually [ __ ] dead [ __ ] this [ __ ] got rabies like a mall [ __ ] this is crazy dance [ __ ] crazy go bring it in there where the food at he's right [ __ ] this [ __ ] put the raccoon on the table yeah why isn't everybody reacting that way like this guy's out of his mind okay I finally see this lady here look at her hand she's pointing right way the lady behind look at her she's like this yeah she's like she's telling him you gotta get the [ __ ] out of here with that yeah [ __ ] oh my god everyone is suspected I would never in a million I would let the guy narrating this open for me I know I said Silurian he's pretty funny but here's the thing here's a deal man I mean there's a lot of homeless people in San Francisco and they're all funny they're all hilarious no this guy was lucky enough to catch his dinner and maybe he stopped not gonna eat that fur in some McNuggets no he's not good I know he wasn't gonna eat it later that doesn't look very appetizing give me something to eat before you go to work look at this [ __ ] krungel man there this [ __ ] right here seen it all [ __ ] echo and put him on the table he's so nasty so nasty yeah so nasty he's so right it's gross well as long as we're on animal whoops do you mind if I show you a clip that I found okay that I thought you might like it's um they're the dentist one oh you have it in your bag it's the the dentist one oh okay thanks okay mm I just figured since we're on the N how did you - I was just on Facebook social media Facebook that is not what you did yeah real I swear to god I'll you know me I'm always on the socials I'm looking at stuff I'm finding interesting things for the show no there you go so this one's for you that's a nice cleaning this kid's braces the braces are dirty and the rat is eating out the food from the bracelet do you realize that if I were in the same room was that kid out taking that thing and throwing it with everything I have in school yeah that would have grabbed it out of his hand be like hey watch out splatter against you wouldn't let a rat clean out your dirty braces oh you know I've never seen you get this grossed out by stuff usually I'm the one that's true and I'm so excited I finally found your thing which I'm happy it made you I know I made you really yeah because I'm usually the one having to watch guys attack oh I got some of that for you don't worry thanks don't worry but see how happy it made you yeah it major now I get it Oh since we have this is actually this [ __ ] as big-time this no no this is a big deal because we lost our sponsorship money we have some new merchandise oh right that is uh in the store and this is like pretty exciting stuff so what we have first of all is that whenever I have overstock of like a specialty tour mate tour poster from weekend this one got people flip for Paul granese designed it he's my man awesome poster designer this is the one that's from Oklahoma City San Antonio Houston and Dallas they always go quickly so just go to the store see if you can get one they're all signed it says let's get physical making comedy and it has me with a knife and a cowboy yeah it's it's really awesome it wouldn't be my first choice for a tour posters yeah they were very popular sure so try to get one of those then really exciting this was a design that was sent to us actually like a couple years ago oh yes and we actually I actually have this mousepad at home that's right and then we decided to have them made because people would ask me about that and in addition to that we have custom try it out guys stickers from the try it out guy and these are you so basically you get them together so you get to try it out guy you get the mousepad it's a great drawing of the try it out guy oh my god so funny if you uh if you have a chance blue van I don't know if you can find out who designed both of those try it out but I'd love to give them a shout and then finally for the people just hits on the tracklist it's become such a phenomenon here the last weeks we decided to do an official cool-guy Club included so foot up on ya the foot up because my favorite part the foot is the signal of course that you're putting a butt plug in so it's our own little wink and nod to everybody who's in the cool guy Club yeah and you can let people know that you're also you're a card-carrying member official member of the cool guy Club so thank you very much those three items are heavy added to the store merch me that calm slash Tom Segura that is so nasty it's pretty nasty cool guy cool guy Club that's is that Josh Potter's voice okay no it's just a cool guy oh by the way this is just to tell you how amazing our fans are yes we really do have you guys are the best the funniest unprompted just them hearing about what went down with McDonald's know our fans went to McDonald's Instagram page and just bombarded like if you open any of the recent post McDonald's it's just your mom's it's Holly and I I was pointed to it by somebody and I was like oh we didn't make we didn't ask people that know we didn't they just did it on their own they're the best they're just for comments like this is under like a regular McDonald's post it says so here's the deal man you fired ymh for Terry's review of a butt plug and Jax leave those other dudes are in the cool guy club guess who's not you McDonald's it says good morning Julia I wanted to let you know I build all these McDonald's for you Julia that's the type of guy you're getting can you believe only four strokes come over and try it out it says rip McDonald's ymh was the best thing about your company since mu soup maybe do some research next time Wow yeah well that is a good point I mean if I feel like we were told they did their due diligence and then they got upset about what we normally do so whatever I guess they put a post where they wrote something about adventure and this person wrote adventure you didn't want to try it out with Terri jeans up all you had to do was take ten and twelve benadryl and try it out could buy Hitler's this is like all there yeah anyways thanks very much for that yeah another thing that's happened in the an Instagram world is you guys pretty on top of Garth's Instagram for a while now like every time garth posts something he all the comments it's it got to the point of your mom's house yeah I was looking at Garth's every post and within seconds it was just littered with ymh there were no more genuine garfi yeah well his his team has starting has started Auto banning thing hack the moderators there have taken like they look for hot words now you know they found words like I think piss on me yeah but they're still worried you can get in there I'm sure there are some that they haven't caught on to yet like I don't think they know that Garth could be in the cool guy Club but I don't know that maybe they don't know about hardcore fun yet no not at all I mean that's that's definitely I really like that that's a that's a newer thing for sure so by the way his new album is titled fun oh he asked for listeners or like fans to send in suggested hashtags like y'all are better at hashtags and me so y'all suggest them and it was nothing but your mom's house I I suggested the big ass fun album oh that's good I thought that was fun yeah I really like fun I really like fun yes stadium tour his work got inducted to Hoffy but now he should definitely go for five could you play the other clip that she says do we have it um that would be so hardcore fun that would be so you know what oh yeah our word is a word it I don't know if it's in yellow you how are you today are you having a hardcore fun are you having a hardcore fun oh last week's thing oh you're having a hot here I found it oh thank you oh oh you did have it yeah what is it you are completely [ __ ] that is really that's really something you know but she doesn't pronounce the word that correctly either she doesn't pronounce it that correctly oh she says she says it you are you are completely yeah what did she say you are you are completely what I don't know what's the next thing everybody are completely [ __ ] with a little vocal fry on the end - yeah okay I got it now I got another thing you are completely [ __ ] yeah yeah that's good hardcore fun this is a teacher English too so you try and learn English yeah go to her yeah yeah really something gene you told me that you were mm-hmm you were what was it you were at it we had a lunch and you so I went to I sometimes I go to this place in Malibu and I sit there and I have lunch and I just look at the ocean and I was there's a couple next to me it was like like the rich the rich guy yeah and he's got like the hot 20-something year old model from yeah Siberia she's literally from Siberia and and they just gone like they went for a walk and they were having like a champagne boozy lunch and and he in he's he's trying to woo her and get laid and you know she's like well in my country we don't have sunshine and he's like well I can't believe that because you're all the sunlight I need like that kind of [ __ ] yeah and at one point she's like you know I I don't have a good memory I don't remember things and he's like what I hope you remember our first kiss I know it's so rad because I'm sure she was a smoke show dude and here's the deal man is that I totally was like judging her I'm like whatever she's hot but she's like this dumb box arrived which is what you want in that situation I'm serious what do you wait what yes I guess cuz he just wants to go we're trying to smash you what yeah you know want a [ __ ] professor right you know that's true somebody who's like that shiny that's and that's exactly how she was talking yeah like he would bring up a point and then she would over talk about it like he's like yeah a friend of mine got fired the other day because he didn't observe the brand or something she's like I totally agree it's so right to do what the bus tags yeah like she's just so anyway I'm judging her I'm judging her and then he's like the guy goes at what points like you know you're perfect right and I know and then he's like what are your tattoos of and then she goes where that the first one is Socrates the unexamined life is not worth living and I was like oh my god that's actually really smart and that's like nothing I live by she's like the other one is a startled and shit's like a [ __ ] heiress thought about and I was like oh my god she is perfect like it was you're like you like that yeah and smart yeah I'm the worst person in the world I also would say that's not perfect but yeah to be smart well it's kind of a bummer when like if you take out I remember you take out a girl god and you're like just you know easy to manipulate you get excited and then you know she starts with her all her words you mad [ __ ] she's got all these thoughts yeah you know yeah it's kind of depressing well you know that's what he wanted cuz this girl was clearly a like a Siberian model like she really was cute and he just wanted to get it in there after lunch like I think because it was a hotel and I think he wanted to be like let's just go through school right now yeah let's go I know next time if you don't mind maybe snap a couple pics oh babe well I mean so NASA if we can examine it guys want to take a look I can't even see you doing something like that honestly doing something like what like just like well maybe like in ten years when you have your full midlife crisis yeah and you abandon the kids and me yeah but what I mean right now I got a bang bus like this is crazy I is that all you guys are doing our first shorty bangbros look yeah like I just tell I have somebody go in the audience I'm like pick out Guzzi ones you know like her whoever's on the rub rub shirt that is the candidate go get them line them up yeah I'm on the bus we do a little drive around the venue everybody rides the pony yeah and then we throw him out the door okay um I guess now that he's in prison we can talk some smack did you hear these rumors about Cosby that he would do a similar thing what's I had heard a rumor this is years ago okay Rudy that the cause would have somebody pick out hose too damn that's a rock show move I've never heard that happening at Comic oh yeah especially at a Cosby Show the like I know little [ __ ] yes over maybe this isn't Cosby but I mean Cosby is like people whatever Hamleys and bring the grandmother to see you know I know for this [ __ ] but that's why I when I had heard this before I was awesome but yeah so he would have girls suck his pain through a fence did you hear that what yeah I swear to God I promise you he would I know you've heard this I heard this but from a reputable show business insider source I heard wait a minute I heard the fence story about another economic though maybe it's that other person okay maybe not the cause it doesn't sound like a Cosby but it does them above the fence oh okay maybe it's the other person I'm thinking through the fence yeah you can't see him being like that oh my bootie is squirting through the fence somebody gotta clean up how much to do with the cause it couldn't have watched what how much to do it with him not now now he's all blind I thought you may not now he's a convicted now his eyes don't work that really wasn't the rule for me that I was looking for I'm not the rapey part yeah the rapey parts kind of bad mmm who would you rather do though Cosby or Weinstein don't feel good about the balls oh who would I rather do yeah consensually you don't have to be drugged I'll probably the cars between those two really yeah Weinstein is so disgusting he's so disguise but so is cause now yeah but less so I can see the the degrees of grows Weinstein is horrendous and the cause is gonna make me giggle a few times I don't know though it not if you're awake he might be he might like you lifeless you know that's true he might be annoyed that you're a chatty kind of how you are with your Siberian [ __ ] huh you think he would just put it in while you were sleeping yeah really yeah that's his whole mo he's the key that's what he likes right yeah I guess that's really gross I know it's such a bizarre proclivity like I don't there's the sleeping body yeah I mean that's like that's toeing the line of some serial killers yes this is almost dead ball oh yeah I mean that it's imagine if he would have done some kill bells not his dark hour like The Cosby like like to [ __ ] him one the sleeper and people are like that would be grateful that would be like his breakthrough I know most of New our I feel like we have to open the comedy gates and allow our convicted comedy friends like you can do one more hour of stand-up but you have to talk about the darkest [ __ ] yeah just give it to us you got you can't no more yeah I mean he would straight just sit in a chair for like hours sit there didn't to our set I know he did Jesus to be odd to be completely honest like I know he was funny when I was a kid right yeah I don't think I could sit there any of those concert videos like I would watch Eddie Murphy over and over yeah with him just [ __ ] sitting in a chair I could watch I can't take that oh yeah yeah Bill Cosby himself was like the first thing I ever saw yeah and it was here's the thing I mean I didn't have a developed comedy mind ok 9 but I was in tears mm-hm watching that guy I mean I was a kid but for someone just sit there and tell talk and just make you cry laughing like that yeah but isn't that crazy that he could entertain a nine-year-old yes that his sensibility and his real stuff was just so dark so dorothea he's a [ __ ] murderer he's not a you know what I mean yeah let's drink oh hey are we by the way confirmed blue band for this dr. Drew's show start next week we're gonna be recording our first episodes next Monday Monday so and they'll come out the fall they'll come out on Friday if everything goes right audio will come out Thursday video will come out Friday on our YouTube check it's very exciting can we plug these the contact stuff for people yeah you sure can so dr. drew is gonna be watching clips he's going to be answering emails and questions and he's also going to be talking to comics if you want to ask dr. Drew a question you can write an email to dr. drew after dark at gmail.com that's dr dr e w after dark at gmail.com or you could this is a set up number yeah it'll go straight to voicemail but if you know you have a like a really urgent important question yeah you want yeah and i would also suggest if you're calling in and leaving a voicemail please have your thoughts put together before you leave the voicemail you may even want to write out a script of what you want to say and I know it's gonna it's probably gonna get a lot of jokey stuff which is fun I mean that's just the world we live in but if you have a real question he'll answer that too so if you want to ask him something real yeah leave the sincere yes it's not a joke that yeah first name is doctor no no it's it's yeah legit like the guys and the guy really is this very smart thoughtful oh yeah and see your dude so I mean you know he can answer your questions so you know that one's coming there you go leave a voicemail you throw us on the screen to write the number yeah yeah so it's eight one eight two five three one six nine three that's eight one eight two five three one six nine three and also leave a callback number in case for some reason dr. drew would want to know yeah answer follow-ups yeah I'd say don't don't leave a callback number we get that in the message oh okay okay there you go there you go mom ignore Christina as usual talk is so ready I hope your Siberian second wife the cool guy there was an awesome awesome suggestion and that was from Pete Holmes we we realized it kind of all tied together and that was that the previous week when we played Terry the cool guy he was putting his butt plug in yeah and he was here that his is uh what's it called his mistake his ruined or gathered right yeah everybody kind of just let it go and then you want everyone just kind of well everybody was like yeah that happens right but then Pete Holmes made a great point you have that clip of Pete Holmes listen to Pete Holmes here when you hear a real orgasm or a real laugh when you speed them up or slow them down they sound like animals alright and that's how you can tell he said you know once said that if you actually really slow it down mm-hmm you can hear if you hear it in like an animal sound you can tell that it's real and if it doesn't you can tell that it's fake okay so one of the things that happened to me I've been thinking about Nicole Terry a lot I wanted to know you don't actually see it huh did he really have an orgasm okie-doke are you telling me I'm getting to relive the audio well here's the normal let's listen to his normal no thanks I don't really damnit well here's hey are you toying with me that's what I thought you know are you messing with me don't believe it he had a real ruined orgasm well I wanted to listen to Pete's suggestion and have a little test so I talked to the boys and I said can you slow this down so see of this Oh Bueller you guys hired like a forensic audio exactly we spent money and time on this absolutely thousands of dollars and what we wanted to know is does this sound like an animal oh that's that's the home suggestion right Rose let's see [Laughter] it does sound like an animal yeah it slowed down yeah it'll be down even more and see if you really hear an animal close your eyes oh it does sound like whoa he sounds like a grizzly bear yeah yeah that's real that's Terry dude is that real yes that slowed down that's super slowed down oh my god that's really scary yeah that's crazy that's your Uncle Terry that's not my uncle Ted I think that's Kristina's Uncle Terry and I think the verdict is that's a real that's a real yeah he was really cranking it that's it I think that I don't think he was playing with us you know no I never thought I mean that sounds like the [ __ ] eye I know I didn't think he was joking though I that guy's all in you think so he's all in we actually have a really crazy revelation about it now I know what should we do it now yeah dude I had no idea that we actually played but read that after our okay okay we actually played hey Terry yeah on this show his name is Laura his name is Pierce but we just call him Terry and I had no idea that we played him like a hundred episodes ago 50 or something this was from episode um 439 so that's about 50 episodes there's like almost a year here I go here's what it stands out a Pete's been in the game for a minute yeah he has been [ __ ] things this footage looks like it's got it the [ __ ] stuff game I'm just gonna be trying out and he's still the same guy same old Pete shirtless happy and what [ __ ] stuff hi there my name is Pete and today I'm going to be demonstrating a new toy that I got and the cool thing about it is it incorporates a power drill and a flashlight and your heart look at the Glee oh he's going that is Glee that's something I haven't felt since I was 4 you can't I mean look at that and look at the stache is this from the 70s it's old no I think my guess is that this is probably I mean I know the internet wasn't these enemies but he looks like he's like a - and the hair mid-90s that's crazy he's still he's still [ __ ] Joe [ __ ] stuff yeah on the on the internet making videos I mean did he make he made that I think he did I think there's a very good chance that he made that doesn't look like he bought it from a store do you think wait a minute now this Becca this is opening up a whole new thing do you think Terry made that [ __ ] sleep then did he custom no [ __ ] leave no no no no that's that you can buy oh okay no I mean I'm I'm on the road a lot you can sure what so you and your friend can yeah I mean everybody that opens for me on the tour bus yeah well charge and you do the double so we'll do it right before the show like just we're gonna put our dicks in it and we [ __ ] it then we come on each other yes and then cool thing yeah we just come together and have a great it's like how Madonna and the truth or dare documentary would do a group prayer before every show and full charge to you a group jerk it's comedy man yeah funny guys do the [ __ ] leave in there and go ahead and perform I don't thank you for not I don't want to watch this again so thank you for not yeah so if you guys wanna help visit Gary again he's there and I bet it worked unfortunately he didn't have an orgasm on that tape oh he didn't know check this out we got an email gene yeah hey mommy's I can't believe the reaction Christine gave to the video of the book of the bro making some sweet review vids of bro toys for his fellow bros who use toys it was broma phobia at its worst it's almost like she doesn't support the looking good bro totally LGBTQ movement at all just here for the crown molding Joe wow you got really called out I think he's right I think I am bromo phobic guy called you homophobic called you a Joe hey so this is type of guy again I'm bro phobic not homo bromo what's going on my ear see that's too complicated you look like Wolf Blitzer with all this [ __ ] in your ears I love it I can't do it I feel like the the ear buzz is too loud and then I'm always worried about them falling out I'm too self-conscious they look terrible on you really you look like a total Dada nerd I kind of like it no you look really stupid I gotta tell you I love you so I'm gonna tell you yeah it looks silly Tom hmm it doesn't look cool at all you look like you should be out in Afghanistan doing a reporting yeah it's a little intense for just watching a guide jerk video I love it but you're so intense you're like Anderson Cooper there well I'm from Kabul I just wish that this one would fit like the other one right they don't why not we're not professional news we were so dumb by the way we were wearing he's wrong and then the viewers wrote us in there like maybe don't wear them like your stupid stupid [ __ ] [ __ ] yeah and they sent us pictures of the correct way to wear these yeah but the correct way first of all works it's worse for me personally yeah and then I don't like it I don't like how the sound is I like to hear the ear muffs mmm I mean even though I look ridiculous mm-hmm no let me see it looks intense you look really weird does this one does it look let me see the other one well that ear hole is enormous is the headphone yeah am I wearing it the same yeah it looks terrible on both sides you look so nerdy hmm it's so nerdy babe thanks well I'm standing outside the cafe and both sides haven't agreed to terms there will be no funding as of now for the wall but we'll see after a speaker and the president and reconvene we're hoping that they'll be able to vote on whether or not the government can reopen back to you wolf that's what you look like whereas I look like we are the Braxtons and you'll see that we Anna I can I am Treena tape margin that's it I am keeping my dork phones in thank you I'm keeping them you look really nerdy it's fine I like it I really like it no chicks are gonna date you like that you're not gonna get your Siberian model that way you said that you're getting a lot of cool fans out there I don't understand what everyone was a [ __ ] stupidity right thanks for bringing it up our people say nice thing yeah I did I did Melrose I was on the the Joe Rogan show yeah and I got up on stage and a drunk woman in the front and goes Kristine you [ __ ] [ __ ] and I was like that's a little intense lady it does a lot of women out there fully [ __ ] full of [ __ ] and it's like I I wouldn't I'd leave out the [ __ ] you know I felt that kind of made it harsh I was like whoa I forgotten for a second don't you agree like [ __ ] [ __ ] is too far it's a lot yeah stupid [ __ ] okay dumb [ __ ] yeah it's a lot by the way this Christine stuff I I just remembered I was looking at our wedding album yeah do you know that when Tom and I got married the priest that married us in the Bahamas during them ceremony called me Christine yeah I think legally that gives me an out I think it means that like you know we're serious but we're not married you know you're terrible right that is so rude baby now your name's not even said I met you there's a lot of ymh listeners out there that would love to be married to Christine oh I bet I bet they're you're right yeah and you are welcome to take them what is happening to us well nothing I just feel like you know it's pretty obvious women are stupid Tom laughs did he open her mouth well here's the thing why don't we take a quick break and we'll come back with one of the all-time most celebrated favorite guests I mean people just absolutely love Yoshi oh yeah we'll be back here with Yoshi in just a moment we'll be back to talking about farts and dicks after this quick break and we are back with one of the all-time Hall of Famers a first-ballot guest if you will oh yes he always has amazing stories and we're so happy to welcome back the great Yosh make yourself useful you stupid dumb [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] we missed you your fans are so nice to me they really are they love you there and thanks for having me on the show of course and I have to say there's a trend in show business when someone becomes really famous and success used to be closer into the malls all right pull it back yeah put a camera like this yeah okay is that better blooming is that good don't forget he's like a shy asian guy oh god it's like I think so okay I think so there's a trend you said in what I noticed over the years once someone becomes really famous they will cut off all that less successful friends so you guys never did that oh yeah I appreciate it nobody I mean that's I know I mean I'm not gonna name names but you and Russell Peter's been really good to me and of course Norton and I tell but yeah yeah of course been well you're a friend we loved you for years yes you had no reason to but thank you Oh we've always we've always been big fans you know I mean we actually got together you were up in Sacramento when I was there not this latest time but like a year and a half ago or something yeah yeah and you came you did spots yeah and you were very generous with your shell and yeah I like I really like your fans you always be back always make me laugh man where have you been we haven't seen you in new at two years now a long time pretty close to two years yeah are you yeah because also last time we you talked to us you were you were Valen you get paid to allow medical testing to be done you do those trials I still do them yeah and just I understand okay if they're listening now for the first time yeah when there's a new medication they're like oh this will treat maybe Alzheimer's or pancreatic cancer cancer they have to do a trial to see it the effects of the drug on a live human being right hey those people to be essentially human guinea pigs right they do it on animals first yes they do on Asians and you sign up for these yeah is this your primary income sources I just don't make enough money I mean when I do show with Jim Norton or a tell and and Russell it's a really good month because they're so generous mm-hmm but I don't still chose and quite after when I do my shows regular shows have the female audience are covering their faces so yeah that's not a best way to make money right but yeah primary but I do get really weird gigs on the side you know like consulting stuff and a dope business and things like that right because again for for the new listener yeah you worked in the adult business as like it was it editor or yeah and producing DVDs and PR and for a long time yeah this month it's actually I hate 28th year mark involving a business yeah and me and my friend Brendan daily saw the movie to show time for pandemic it's it's been on it we were kind of shocked because I thought maybe 4,000 people watch your first week he told me not to give the number but the number was significant higher first week people have been watching it on Showtime yeah porn yeah it's available now yeah what's it what is the premise of the it's a funny documentary it is no I there was HIV outbreak in adult business 20 years ago mm-hmm and there was a guy named Mark Wallace been accused of spreading HIV he's supposed to lie on test results and we found him and but even I was kind of shocked it was very ambiguous made he lie oh that's it that's part of the movie you'll find out in the movie but I worked on it I'm still kind of like confused about whether or not he lied well what happened was paperwork looked suspicious but the medical facility that he was getting tested moved to another location so the paperwork was a little messed up and I don't think it's necessary he might have not done it it could have been honest mistake on the clinic you know so so we still don't know whether he knowingly lied is there I mean I think he's guilty and affecting people he was so difficult meeting with the industry people because whenever there's some HIV case they do this backward map who are infected and see who has sex with em last one week a month they go backwards and test everyone and see who's you know and if they're a negative obviously didn't infect anyone well Mark Wallace didn't want to get tested he was the last guy to be tested he refused to do it for a long time and finally we did it yeah but there's a little bit you know it's 20 years so even my you forget things you know like so so what does he do now yesterday I mean I was shocked when Brandon found him three four years ago because honestly if if that was my daughter and she was just HIV positive because I'm I will kill the guy but he's still alive and we found him in Vegas is he still like around the adult business though I don't know what he does but I don't think so yeah yeah even like world-famous Milt Allen Tom Brian mailed sorry Tom Brian no Tom Bayern what is he known for I mean this guy he it's he's spending consummately since he was 18 and he was in the business for 30 years and you know I think he's driving uber there's nothing wrong with that but if you don't take care of your personal finance it's not like I could charge them I mean the bad shape too but there are people who they're having hard time making transition from performing the business of a long time in annuities like you guys are very successful comedians but you know there's other comedians too you know over the years you know they're struggling or yeah there's a time limit on everything in every form of entertainment you know you need kind of an exit strategy sure so that makes sense yeah yeah I'm actually gonna go from I'm planning on from comedy into the adult business Oh as a performer but I'm gonna get into that like that dad older dad pours that is that a genre yet it's very popular actually dad stuff well like I'm saying like I'm I'm probably do stand-up I'm hoping another 10 to 20 years yeah and then it'll be like - I tend to talk you could do it for 40 more years common but it's he's physically it breaks him down to tour so there's a joke of being serious I'm being serious I think well I think about I'm 30 I'm gonna be 40 right so if I do it stand-up for 20 years I'll be 60 right that's a perfect time to kind of like wind down the touring and be like I'm gonna get into some hardcore scenes you know I'll be fully gray by ya and I'll just be like I'll play older you know I'll be like I wanna work I got it go to the bathroom and then I get like the nurse do you know what you know what that's interesting yeah there was this really old Japanese guy he had one on his pH stays porn he was having problem with that and no one at the retail store in Japan would help him so he actually travel to the actual company and when you show the up this is like 10-15 years just with his tape yeah I'm having trouble with my tape yeah so complaint huh I'm gonna travel yeah so he just happened to show up and they were making pornos so he started watching and whoever's the male talent was a having problem so they asked the old guy he must be in 60 some years old do you want to try it so he's been [ __ ] ever since then why yeah he must this is a dream tell me more inspiring stories like this awesome you could do that or I was thinking we could franchise Morton's be franchise owners yeah it's a good idea or porn and whatever whatever you want about that laughter like instead of going more traditional like we have the studio space right I start shooting like content here and then put it up on my own site and people have to subscribe or buy directly from me you know why this is so funny to me I was in Vegas over the weekend for the foreign avian and works you know how'd it go it was great Esther could kill that she was great yeah okay I remember her poster she hosted and I was really shocked because I haven't been at the award show in seven years I was shocked how well the show ran and how disciplined the audience were because you know David tell Jim no no those guys are very funny but they're always a there - no no they did host it before but the problem is this young grow so show their tits and I don't care how funny you are no one's gonna be laughing at your jokes when girls are showing their that's true at all you know it's a problem at Tom shows a lot there's a lot of hot chicks showing their tits and they show you're that kind of guy right everybody it's the [ __ ] tour and when Esther was hosting discover some way more professional and proper and the show right I want to [ __ ] with a girl that's true yeah that's something to do it it was around very very well and cardi B was great oh it's right yeah it was fantastic yeah and what'd she do perform a song or beginning and at the end of the show and really I couldn't believe the production of it was amazing oh but the reason I was telling you you know how they make this gag porn like the old remake like Avengers 2 but they make porno version yeah my parrot and stuff right I was talking a couple of directors did she make a parody porn about podcasting people doing porno okay so when we walked in I'm not even joking yeah when I walked in hands like they could rent from you guys uh-huh I felt our show it's fun come in your mom's house people just shoot all over your mom I'm expecting top dollar come back in a couple hours right thank you Yoshi can I ask you I yeah have you ever have you ever dated a porn star or had sex with a porn eat the ass and [ __ ] all the time I got nothing I don't know I don't know about dating I hang out with a couple of them and I'm little nervous because like what am I gonna do you know I'm old you know but you don't know you're not you look about 30 you are the perfect guy yeah Josh Potter should both Hosea Josh Potter I'm sorry one of our producers a huge hilarious comic and you guys are built to date these porn girls I think yeah yes because great you're not gonna be weirded out yeah not judgmental judgmental you're both like down for you're not needy high-maintenance guys I don't I don't think I'm jealous I don't think dating - right we're but there's certain performers like it's not even sex I like I like their personality yeah okay so even better yeah and then you can eat their asses when they can they want it mind yeah and your if you but ate their yeah I would imagine so why well because I think no there's a difference between work and private stuff you know I don't but I don't assume I don't know we'll see but um the girl died like right now Charlotte Oakley and Adriana chechik they're really good personalities you know but you like their personality yeah there's pretty because it's a business full of beautiful girls you know but some of them have like no [ __ ] personalities and you know bummer these are the girls you like meaning you know them personally or you're you're just into their work I don't know them personally but I could tell by their Instagram I think Instagram is really you don't know them personally oh I mean I couldn't meet them but I like Y like I've known so much you you're I think that one of the big issues from good guys yeah dating a girl in this field is that yeah I think you're that you wouldn't get jealous right of the work I won't get jealous but I'll be I'll be more like concern for them in what way well I'll be worried but certain people that they would work with you know I know some of the reputations yeah but you could what do you mean by that certain people's reputations what do you mean I think hmm I better be careful I think some guys have some good reputation and bad right yeah and I think I think some of them could read a girl and figure out some of the girls are submissive so they might do stuff that they shouldn't because they won't complain what they could get away with it there's other girls there's other girls that's so powerful and strong they won't tolerate so you're saying that there are guys that would push boundaries without asking and kind of a right for you it also because you're kind of well-informed you'd be talking to your you know girlfriend in this situation be like make sure you probably want to work with this guy why don't I heard Segura's great but some of these other guys like right yeah yeah the girl would be great yeah he's a really strong performance he's thoughtful scenes over quickly he can take a dump and then go right into the scene it's definitely not gonna hurt by the way I don't want to promise anything but because because get a conversation Mobe into the business because a conversation over the weekend it was very it was very surprising yeah convention for me but I had several conversation I think I have a pretty good chance eventually I'm pretty sure I could get rocco siffredi on the show here oh my god he's still my heart my favorite really it was to come yes I was really I was really really shocked because um what happened was I have very bad breakup and I have to say Oh Yoshi you were dating somebody no no from evil angel oh right that sorry I remember that mm-hmm and I was a few years ago now how many years ago it'll be seven years next month mm-hmm and Christina and I think you Sarah - but Oh Jo Kasai you're very compassionate person and I think you after we were recording I think you were concerned how angry I was because yeah it kind of eat you alive inside when you're angry all the time and that's that's the issue I have yeah deal with but I was shocked because um I made three or four new people working evil angel and they come up to me you know offering friendship and say nice things because people who got me fired from evil interests seven years ago oldest people are gone and last my December they got all five good and does that make you feel better knowing that those people are fired now do you feel vengeance has been done so I worked on this podcast coat the last day of August this porn star that ended up killing herself a year and a half ago it's on audible and it's for its for audible listeners only right now right now and then it will be available to the general public in April okay Bhairo famous Jon Ronson and I feel vindicated the things that they have accused me it's clear if you listen to podcast I was vindicated it's it's all why are you mentioned in the podcast I'm in it and I've been mentioned and and then producer Lena a wonderful job what is the prep because I actually heard about I saw this in the news yeah that this was announced the Jon Ronson is is the host producer executive user of this podcast and then we've ordered a storyteller yeah and he's done other big ones yeah man who stare ago which George Clooney starred in he wrote a book called Frank which Michael Fassbender played in yes you're a book all Psychopaths vest you read oh that's a favorite thing so but this this the last days of August yeah is a podcast that he produced a multi-episode podcast yeah that explores why she killed herself that this well-known porn star a huge star yeah so what happened he he made us this is technically season two season one it's got the butterfly effect mm-hm and it's a story about how wide available porn on the internet like pornhub and things like that how it destroyed porn industry and how much they had impact on people especially young people their attitude bisexuality and things like that so that was kind of fascinating and it's great yeah it was ranked like top 5 podcast 2017 I don't know much about the sexuality aspect of it but I know that the business side the fact that the internet and like free content beginning thing destroyed the revenue of something that people used to just have to pay for sure so season one is about how high tech destroyed the industry season two with August it's about how industry had an impact on individuals right and 2017 five adult performers died to suicide and three overdose or three suicide she overdose so it was a it was a really rough yeah hi but the recent Jon Ronson picked August aims because he wrote a book call so you've been publicly shame it's uh oh yeah I've heard of that yeah he wrote that book so it was combination of year before he covered other business and also public shaming this is a perfect storm of [ __ ] it's a terrible story he was going to work on a story about Alex Jones but he shifted to other shames so um they were contacting people and one that they mention my name he he and his producer contact me about a year ago and then I talked to them and I helped him what you know they were asking me certain things and I hear you know I'm that expert but I know a little bit more because my experience you know a lot more and but it was really hard on me and them and I think it's they told me that it's a very sad and dark story and but it's very interesting story were you friends with the girl no I avoided her because everybody telling me she's nice typical Canadian but her husband is the guy who got me fired from evil angel oh so I feel really awkward meeting her yeah okay but no no this was all this part of the conversation was all prompted by the fact that you mentioned Rocco oh yeah what about it what you said that you had oh this was a one of many conversation I had with people and the people who got me fired see why don't what a ok select Game of Thrones people that you hate they get killed but not in the way that you wanted to be so I wish I wish they'd forget fire after the podcast cuz I have something to do it they got fired for unrelated to that podcast ok so I had no I had no bad you know so yeah I'm happy I guess you're out of there but not the way I want it does that make sense to you yeah I'm sure you want it to be more hateful and directed to yes I agree I'm the same way so wait so how do you know Rocco and are we going to talk to him about yeah mhm and tell him that I if he remembers our conversation we had backstage when Tom was shooting why are you shooting some deaf Gio so how many was Russell Peters and I he and I had a very heart-to-heart intimate conversation about his Hungarian wife still together oh yes good and he told me some childhood stories even we had quite a moment Rocco I really did we didn't amazing at him he's amazing he's absolutely amazing person he is a wonderful man he won once again 1 mil foreign performer of the year wait he's back performing he's performing yeah he retired he went aboard and it wasn't the whole people he wasn't he wasn't at the convention but there's new people Evo Angel and every one of them woke up him say hi I'm so-and-so I love hearing all the stories about you and I hate Adam and Kevin the two people that got me fired so that's what they know how much I hate them so that's how they introduce themselves to me I hate the atom in Kevin but I think they seem pretty it's incredible how they have changed the plays they're doing a lot of new stuff because they're really suffering because the piracy only way you know just like when I had a conversation with Dave Attell there's some guy in England stole his complete act and doing them work what yeah and I I told him Dave what are you gonna do and like he said like well what am I supposed to do you know flying too long to punch the kind of face I think a tailless attitude is only thing I could you just keep writing your material yeah there's a guy touring with Dave's material that's what I heard it's like Gallagher and Gallagher to remember the brother picked up exactly he liked licensed titters yeah I know unlicensed like is the is the guy in England is he must be like a open or level comic right he's just like yeah I think so so I don't know if they were still doing it that's not a backfire pretty bad you should and I think evil angels are doing a lot of new things you know so like as long as you create something new and you have a better interaction with fans and I think ironically Instagram and things like that are helping a lot of this female talent with their fan base I agree okay can harness it they have more power now maybe they can build websites right the membership-based and create their own content that's the big thing right yeah do that I think that's really helping the girls in the business almost shifting power away from the studio and right and some of these grows you know they have 3 4 million Instagram followers and I don't know you make money but I think they are cuz that's a lot of pictures you know so so that's a one good things you know and wait you know she you mentioned when we sat down here that you're not producing a show you mentioned a stand-up Kesari can you how did you think though we still don't have the answer why do you think that Rocco would be willing you're like I think that that might happen because when we ask that last time I didn't have any sort of support from evil angel or they're saying this is a good thing for you they don't really know you but because the theaters new people even Joe they're willing to promote the company non-traditional way and and I could tell they listen to your podcast and other stuff and and they're all about promoting the performers doing brand I got you so next time when Rocco I have a big project to promote I got you it'll be easier coming from somebody in upper management now what happened with because you saw this Netflix documentary I'm assuming right yeah so it wasn't the whole thing that he was leaving the life and that was how it ended right right back again I think so because I think he still have financial responsibility he's family you know yeah he have to work and I think what I I think it's it's even in a documentary I think or maybe something I read afterwards his wife it's not jealous at all like no no no she seems totally cool I got some yoga today I'll see you later yeah yeah it's like if this is what make you happy and go do it you know don't just stay home and do nothing you know and right and the hobby yeah cars and I always say Barack was like Michael Jordan porn absolutely and if he's even at the 70% level that's still 70 percent Michael Jordan you know would you say he's a very strong performer I didn't even realize I said that and when I heard you say I didn't know yeah that's all you man yeah you introduced us to that lingo because that's how Rockhold you know female talents he's like strong perform yeah absolutely Russian once it's really tough I don't know what's up with that yeah tough as an Eastern European run Russians yeah not fun no no they're they're really strong they could take beatings there DT out is what he's saying beatings yeah well not literal beatings but that's a vaginal beatings I believe it because we're bred for [ __ ] yeah and we're very hard hardened does he still is he still pretty hardcore in his movie making I think so yeah and he has another so he has other he'll pick you know he'll maybe do one scene but he'll they have cup other straw mill performers but I think Eastern Europe and Russia because it's a interesting geography right like they've been invaded they look really strong genetic and these are like tall beautiful girls and they're physically beautiful but they're physically strong because it's not an easy place to survive that's right rough terrain yes communism that's right Nazi throw it up the German screwed it up those regions absolutely you know those people are not flimsy no they're not Rocko's seems up from what I remember to always kind of always go for the leans into that yeah why is that that is just boring to him so what badger is just boring to him yeah see yeah he's over that's what John Salley and said [ __ ] [ __ ] it's all about [ __ ] you know a nice quote is that Nietzsche now sorry so back now because because you could bake with the vaginal sex but you can when you have a huge stake in your answer you can't fake it that's why a no is like a big part of it because ever since 1997 with Viagra there's a lot of guys cheat you know like John and I agree with him I think just seeing naked girl enough to get your dick hardness and if it's not you shouldn't be in the business so raka was before 97 it's it's all him he doesn't have to cheat oh I see yeah he's never never soft no now it's interesting you say the vagina is kind of you can cheat but then the but you can't cheat as a woman in the female talent there's no pretending well I mean okay there's an attendant right because it's not as flat as well as the Machine if you like those my favorite painful yeah yeah the vagina stretches it's it's meant to accommodate with pain or more yep sure that's I I didn't know but I hope you everybody go and listen to the last day last days of August because in season one I think if you really want to know what's going on in yeah if you want to know what's going to PO industry you sure because I think this just you might agree porn is important because we don't have an adequate sex education in this country unfortunately yeah and that's good they don't teach kids and I think parents are irresponsible and they're scared to talk to their kids well guess what when you do that kid's gonna talk to other ignoring kids or what's likely porn yeah yeah I'm so there I think industry's hosts trying to change and I think that suicide last year really shocked the industry and every no one was talking about that podcast because I think they're really afraid what's in it and and people people get blamed for her death in that thing you know so mmm-hmm that's why that comedy show you're doing yeah it sounds really light-hearted so what is the yeah you are booking a comedy show there's a rehab place called Sunny Acres up in San Luis Obispo yeah and we had a one show and rehab for drugs and alcohol okay but Tony you may be quarter of the audience member are registered sex offenders low-level whatever that means that's what they told me exposure exposing yourself to a minor maybe lewd and lascivious why that's exactly what my friend he said yeah that was this thing I'll tell you why cuz we used to live in a really dicey neighborhood and there's that what is it called not the AMBER Alert you crime maps you can look it up on LAPD crime maps and it'll tell you what kind of crimes and pedophiles and sex offenders are in our neighborhood and lewd and lascivious conduct I think was the biggest one exposing oneself to a minor that's a biggie - yeah just it was just sort of fun hobby I had back in him we live in the bad neighborhoods I know I got to shoot out by a couple of comedians for doing it sure what happened what do you mean well so some of the comedian's some of the convenience think I'm kind of promoting sexual assault and things like that oh by by providing an entertainment for a little bit of all sex offenders right but they're in a rehab facility yeah they can't leave and this is like their last resort so I apologized to people who've running into a place but it's a huge land and I forgot the guy's name he made tons of money and he had this huge land incentive of his you know this road like you had to be thousand feet away from school and church ever yeah and so he has this facility which is so big that it's away from the oldest area that you shouldn't be sure and then he's providing these guys their last chance to turn their life around and and sex offenders need a laugh - yes right but what's funny is I I did only one show with the rosy trend and you know it was a little uncomfortable because I still have a sick sense of humor so I had a 3/8 grade t-shirt eighth grade - movie so I had that I had that t-shirt on and I did a show and the head for the sex offender is wearing that shirt and I did a show for them and I had a lot of six jokes and there was very careful what they laugh because they're worried the dishing laugh of rape jokes and things like right sure so so so so when Rosie went up she did really well and I had three or four female committees either cancel they want to do it because they figured out the knots I don't know I told them from day one yeah okay sounds like a really good gig for a woman I know and I tell you I've done a lot in my day I've been to Afghanistan I've done City Arabia I don't know if I could I think I'd be a little timid I shouldn't you know I'm glad they're trying to rehabilitate the rails but I'm not sure them I'm their guy so here's my pudding pop would do it let's Cosby all the way now that's a prime good friend oh look at a guy in Cosby from sheet a bunch of puzzles I guess my thinking and it's a very minor minority thinking I've been going to Germany a lot dearly what's in Germany they're there their way of dealing with sex offenders or pedophiles are even if they I saw someone they'd rather they get some help and they will be charged and that they would try to help them and they do help them but the way we have a system here is there's there's not even no chance of trying to get help because you'll be ostracized and we might go to jail so in a really weird logic you're putting kids more in danger because you put enough incentive to punish them that dishing any help my way of thinking I have a work during a comedy show and have a shell eventually opens some community members show them came in watch the show is that there should be facility for these guys to get help because it's better to them getting help not hurting children then hate them so much that and they will be running the streets yeah ain't getting no it's not a it's not a very popular thing to say and I'm always in the minority and stuff like this but I think in the long run I'm I have a faith in that my way of think is probably better than not doing anything about it and thinking that you know they're enough you know but believe me I have her earful from people does it rehabilitation work in Germany it seems like it I mean I've read several circusy now go there obviously like porn in six culture and prostitution things like that right right isn't that your favorite spot where didn't you say Frankfurt was your favorite one in the best place yeah and for for prostitution and prostitution and Jewish burger is another good one is it because it's just like well regulated as well regulated it it's legal and is it like the Amsterdam where it's like in booths and stuff like that or no it's um I forgot it's it's it's in the building so it's now open in public in Belgium and Netherlands it's like one of those open door open window so you see prostitute but um I much prefer inside the building so there's a building that you know to go to go in and you'll protect them better I'm a little concerned with Netherlands and Belgium places like that even today they protect them very well just open in public with cameras and stuff I'm just not sure about that yeah but so wait how do you like so you get to when you get to Frankfurt you know where to go at this point sure and then is that building like every time you go in and quite enough do you have to go stairs to the second floor and usually they're between four to five floors in each flow I have multiple doors with the prostitute in there and then do you go do you do you look at a menu do you talk to like a madam or something no there's no madam in in Frankfurt there are madam in Athens it's a different system but well how would you know if you're in Germany which door to like do you just randomly open a door you you you know where the red-light districts are right but I'm saying how do you say thank you because they're usually if the doors are closed that usually means there's no one there or they're busy with the customer uh-huh and if there were so often usually a girl is sitting on the chair stand in front of it oh so you're getting a - oh yeah you can see her all right like she stands yes so and I think if you're going to do something like that it seemed to talk to them of how much it is hollowing it is yeah a negotiation in Frankfurt it's it's it's I guess that's how lowest twenty euros two fifty and but you tell them do you tell them straight up you're like I want to eat the booty like you tell them straight up sure if you want to do that that day I'm talking about you yeah your favorite yeah well yeah I guess so [ __ ] too but right but you're like daddy's hungry I don't see it daddy but yeah yeah and do they ever say oh I have to use protection your protection but um so you use like a dental dam or something mm-hmm Oh what do you use what do you mean well she's saying protection like when you're going down on I don't I don't put anything okay Wow and also they don't make you use protection for oral stuff I think maybe I had like one or two girls offer that and in that case I said then nevermind but you like to go yes I'm like that guy from Sacramento you know that mountain climber that he doesn't use any rope yeah yes wearing ropes is so gay yeah you don't have too much safety that's right right nature need you just said lived in I can't imagine I mean if you're gonna do the old mouth down downtown be like oh there's a plastic guard there yeah what's the yeah it is silly yeah but I did this medical study and Dale was checked my blood only reason I qualified because he's completely clean it's unbelievable no deep you're a medical marvel I mean when you think about you have you told me that you've been [ __ ] prostitutes and or whatever hooking doing things with them I never get anything that's what I'm saying right now it's like I'm breakable you know what I mean like and then you're getting like crazy injections and pills and you're taking all thank you superhuman like what so let's go ready to go you know what's funny a rosy trend keep asking me if I put here anything my hair cuz it she says it's dark ah Jesus look at you how old are you I fifteen few months so it's gotta be all the chemicals and stuff I was losing hair I'm not joking I was losing here three years ago I don't know what what I took it's all that [ __ ] you eat for sure it's gotta be the drunker [ __ ] yeah makes your hair grow back it doesn't make any sense cuz no all my family male is all loose hair by like late 40s you know you look great well I'm coffee now your coffee I ask you another question and God the prostitute thing do you do do you vaginal intercourse with them yeah I mean ain't no cost more and how much more mm-hmm it depends on the girl every everything's negotiable but when I was in Athens I was kind of shocked because this girl just let me put in a vagina without a condom what yeah a hooker did yeah I think it's just crazy it's just like oh okay I'm not gonna complain like you have 40 bucks right yeah no it was 20 euros oh honey is so cheap in Athens cool no where did you meet this there's a true area like where so that there's a ghetto section Athens where the hookers at 10 euros that's like 12 13 dollars Wow right and rich heiress like 20 euros right and I don't know how many times I went to the 20 euros like only Greeks only and they'll kick me out cuz I'm not white Greek or something are you serious I'm very serious so you would go to the place and they'd be like you gotta go yeah oh they do this this finger thing and then they told me leave that means Asian yeah I think so oh my god sign language is this is this is an Asian of thing yeah I'm guessing yeah it doesn't bother me you know no you're not very bothered by those types of no joke surfing people who usually like me comedy-wise they're white and drunk and slightly racist doesn't like girls being like get out of here or was it like no no it's it's it's in Athens what's funny it's my friend let's working it's not funny but my friend was working refugee camp in Athens so I went there you know AIDS refugee so I went through what else I would like 20 G's I got so he was working refugee camps I went there and like in a donate buy food and give talk about the kids or whatever fine and during the day I was born I wonder what's sex industry like in Athens I wasn't expecting any it's pretty interesting that some there's so much every since 10 years ago with the financial crisis you know unemployment is very high still sure yeah yeah so so like I go to prostitution it's it's it's very different like you you see a girl do you like the Madam's there can I ask you this yeah how do you start like when you're in a pinch like I want you start just asking around like they're not just Google like red light district Athens and I okay and I wasn't expecting and there was one so had prostitutes Madam's there yeah so you go to this area you go in and there's a madam and she said they always say this I all know you know I don't speak English but they always say like you know [ __ ] suck that a normal sex 20 euros or whatever okay then they bring to grow out and then you say yes or no and you don't want it you just leave but I I was really really shocked by Athens the quality of girls are just unbelievable high quality which is amazing when your own Greek girls are go or it's they're like Russian polish yeah wow I don't know like a [ __ ] whisperer yeah thank you yeah no I tell you how I know because I when I was in the UAE yeah I what this marine took us to a bar across from the hotel and it was for I wasn't Dubai - oh yeah I think I was in Dubai it was nearby and and he goes yeah these are all prostitutes I'm like what because they were all like white polish or Easter eastern blockers like me yeah not like me but me my tribe and they all that's how they yeah so that girl that you slept with oh yeah oh they're all great I mean you only have ten minutes you got to do better see that's how they turn it's turnover just like waiting tables are [ __ ] a lot yeah I'm ask you one question back to Frankfort so you're negotiating with a girl yeah go in and you're like I would like to go down on you yeah and then I want to have vaginal sex with you yeah and she goes okay so what would that cost let's say sometimes it's the same price other than 30 euro yeah or they will add more money and if you want bareback [ __ ] then they say like it's fifty or hundred whatever and then and then so and then you go and I also want anal how much more is anal is what I'm wondering I'm once again dependent girl but I think average probably fifty more or something fifty that seems fair to me I would pay 50 more backdoor fifty-year-old wanna go on a trip together man yeah yeah do I go where should I go with you where should we go you got to do these term many words for people you go Germany connoisseur now what you know people got America's I was pitching this travel idea and originally my travel up show idea was star in South Africa I'm traveling to all the way to Norway and the only way I could move from one African country to another I have to [ __ ] one prostitute each time yeah and you move up all the way this is brilliant northern Africa yeah and then the goal wrong Middle East you need to talk to my business manager after this yeah let's start the documentary yes I love this Africa I maybe want to end in Africa but so is the idea that you would spread everything throughout the whole journey should your journey get HIV and then you're like I'll give it to everybody but I don't like these shows where the reporters say I'm an X Y & Z red-light district but I never have sex with them like I don't want to [ __ ] listen to you I know she do you know that HIV is rampant yes okay yes and it's even higher in Botswana which will be your next stop yes right after I'll wear a condom okay but would you have sex there with a knowingly hiv-positive prostitute if they're like I'll just wear a condom thinking about it really know me I mean I'm eating about it if it's one of those weird situations if it wasn't a weird system somebody will give me a million dollars to have sex with somebody with a chai oh yeah the offer is just this this girl's gorgeous she's your type but this little thing she's got me a week I mean it wouldn't bother me if I'm getting [ __ ] from her okay but that you would even think about it it's very difficult for men to get it for a woman though unless she's bleeding out of her body and I know check for open sores or anything yeah I mean I know it just sounds really weird thing to say but I know a lot of people with HIV and I have this conversation with them it's amazing like people a couple who are both HIV positive and have a child and she's she or he is HIV negative I don't understand it but the mother nature having credibility you protect children and I know plenty of people I'm sorry but I have news for you America men with HIV with a lot of money their standard in sex with women and they know they have HIV so that doesn't mean they like the sheen he was throwing yeah oh yeah so if you're careful you could have intimate meaningful relationship with somebody with HIV you can yeah but that's not something that I actively look for someone let's talk about this money offer so you um you know you do these medical tests for money yeah if somebody were to offer you yeah ten thousand dollars okay to give a man a [ __ ] no what about fifteen thousand no that's that cash that's not that's ridiculous okay I have higher self-esteem than that okay how about 40 grand now come on I want you to do a refit some millions a melee millions let's beat my wait a minute let's think this through Yoshi because okay how much do you get pissed off like a trick okay it's very sincere how much do you get paid let's say to do your medical testing like to put yourself what's a good one your body and Google jeopardy and I mean like you're injecting yourself full of chemicals nobody knows the repercussions of and psychic I maybe I don't have the number right but I think I think I got 12 14 grand for one month I can leave for like a one month that's good money what what did you do what did you have to do they inject medication right into my stomach every other day man I can't leave and and you know what I hear is no it's a lot of scratch I'm used to needles it doesn't scare me yeah but what I hate is some [ __ ] rookie getting like internship getting chance to practice and like oh no because they don't like they don't put the needle in the right spot so they have to pulled it out like almost like rivers parking in inna until they get that right never you know Jesus and like [ __ ] you know in that experience one will get in the first time everything's cool all right let's let's rephrase this okay let's say yeah for this proposal the guy's clean he's not diseased or anything okay you have to blow him for five minutes uh-huh $50,000 cash I wouldn't do that for that kind of money hold on okay act if he comes you get another 50 grand cash I don't want to do it so it have to be you know sometimes somebody's offering you a job to you and you don't care so only way you might take it you make some ridiculous like demand yeah so I'm not I'm not I'm not into second eggs and I'm not against anyone doing it I got you would you would you ever be a prostitute but for women there's no way they're been interested in me that's not true 100% that's not true would you you don't think there's women that are attracted to handsome Asian men they want somebody way younger than me do you look xxx you could hold way apart crazy rich Asians being Asian to put you in right now nice suit yeah glasses and you could be like I am a professor I can't take that stuff seriously I couldn't ya know oh what's Oh so yes blue band our producer said he has a clip of you here from the last days of August I guess oh yeah the podcast so they found something yeah so here's a you know I don't want to hear on the podcast here it is I have not actually heard my voice in the conversation or nearly free yeah I know wow that's not behind the sing yes okay thank you Wow we also wanted to do this so here's our game okay okay definitely we're really excited about this so here's the thing we know that you you know you're like the porn Whisperer your app up and out of it for seven years yeah but I don't know that knowledge never leaves your mind so here's what we did we pulled on now the audio of certain strong performers and we wanted to see if whether you just listening to them for a clip if you could identify oh no way oh really hey I thought that you might be able to do this confidence okay Yoshi okay well you just listen and we'll do the guy gonna give me multiple choice or something no I'm just gonna say can you tell by this audio and I'm gonna play this clip for you okay and we'll just let you guess okay ready here we go now these people before 2012 know this person's still after this person but this person has been in the business probably now whereas well the female voices right right yeah you don't know who that is they're all current the current what I mean like they're not like brand-new we'd like to hear the audio again yeah Wow okay digging for that I see that I see your mind work does that sound vaginal or anal to you is she faking it good question can't shake a me sounds familiar but yeah take a wild guess who do you think that is I don't know right really Evie yes yes no you're joking are you making that up I'm not making out we have the picture right there oh my god when I heard it first take us through yeah her face popped in my head for some reason but I haven't seen her skating like 2012 that's how connected you know that's a wild guess that is a while that's a wild perfect guest yo she is 1 for 1 let's go to our number 2 here that was really something let's see if you can tell what a gift are you sure you're not making that up I know here's number 2 you ready close those eyes it is okay Wow huh I'm gonna guess vaginal on that one - I think so - I think you're about that can you play it yeah with pleasure man if you get this one I don't know why but she sounds really tiny girl uh-huh ah I like it you're in the right place walk us through it this is like almost like going any working very prime heard this person - that's the Sapphire it's very quiet right yeah he knows it's like a porn spelling bee it is you like to hear the audio one more time sure wow this is really something oh my god this one he's really digging and digging through can you get me tipped what's the letter of the first name you want a first letter yeah well it's not really in the but I'll yeah so I'll tell you it starts the letter K Hey [Music] he's really digging I've never seen Yoshi this focused before I'm probably wrong but Cristiano Road it's not it Carly grey oh I think that's be after my time Hey look you got your first one right out the gate though you're just you're one I'm METEC IMDb I'm pretty sure I've never seen her oh really why I don't recognize that name do you want to try the next one so you don't get this one okay let's see if you know this one here but because you can hear the the bed squeaking you're thinking that maybe she weighs a bit more I mean when I say big meets she's taller right stature can you play it again sure sure why not that sounds anal to me oh pretty good you sure this is pretty new or old that I wouldn't I mean I don't think she's old we know relative oh I don't know anything I don't really pay attention since 2012 so Wow well what's the first layer yes that's the letter J and relatively new relatively new one last night it's at one let's just think through them it sounds like it's painful right it sounds a little anal it sounds like aggressive yes start with the J does she have a secondary name like you know how the first is can we give him a little hint starts to letter J she I've got a clue from blue band didn't know this is from okay anyway no J I can't even think any porn agreement than they J right now just to who's in your mind first names a lot of J's right they're only name popped up is Ariana Jolie but that that's not her that's not her no you knew that it's it's Janis Griffith oh yeah that's another new girl another new girl yeah sorry I'm just living because I mean those it's okay but there's a chance you could finish 50-50 here cuz this last girl is not new okay she's been in the business that's what I'm being told okay here so I'll give you that the audio okay and you can tell me if you can get this one alright I would love for you to go to and - okay here we go oh my god that was beautiful huh I'm completely this can you play it again sorry sure that's vaginal yeah I gotta take a hint what is it letter again a J oh my god and she's been around yeah I'll give you the last name initial - okay are [Applause] No um no guess no there it is oh she was wrong my time yesö where there's no there's no excuse for that one there's no excuse for you we're deeply disappointed but luckily for you the other two I I think they're new let's play the same game with men all now here we go ha ha somebody that you should definitely know are you ready for it - listen yes here we go here we go that was a great flip look I think yo she knows she's digging through that wall god Kenny motivates the y ou black I would assume he's a white guy good yes european- Oh white America I mean is that America that he does that oh yeah you can hear that IG's American you know he sounds old guy is he big no he doesn't he's no no no all right it's white mm-hmm American mm-hmm but not old right but you definitely would know who it is he's not old he's not old not super young either not super young and look at that look at those words it's like asking Fred I know quantum physics should stop it equation or something I don't white go ahead and take a swing at it tell us who you think let him guess don't show him yet let him guess what just give us the first thought yeah oh Sh I don't know why James Dean popped up I don't think let's see let's reveal who is it you know you're making that up no fancy Wednesday gotta rush it so they didn't it didn't sound right to me because it kind of sound him it would sound like that somebody really old like cruncher felt like he was having a passionate moment but sometimes your voice will change when that I'm little taken back by that yeah but guess what you nailed it Wow I'm usually good about showing me dick you know if we're it's but sound I don't know about you got to show you a dick and you'll know who it is you owe me no prior to 2012 yes really you just knew them like that right yeah I've seen them nine ten hours a day you know so come on right you're saying as an editor Wow yeah okay so you're not give me me like a [ __ ] a hill right here this is no no it's really surprised I don't know my keys oh my bad I just had to make that everybody okay so hi mom I am so amazed yeah he knew who you got you want to try the next one yeah okay let's see you can get this one [Music] is this six-time male performer year Manuel Frey oh no oh no play it again play it don't know don't show oh it's right yeah oh that's fine Bill Bailey oh did you know that did you know Bill Bailey's work yeah yeah hmm sorry what have you been in your guessing trove or no no no okay there's one more don't show them let's see let's see if you can get the last one okay oops let's see here here we go [Music] play that again Wow really good I'm sorry why don't you b'gok like that I can working on it wait really dramatic I need help on this one is this person American or European man booth sounds like in a mirror I'm gonna go American yeah blue bands yep Potter says American why don't walk Oh looks like what late again sorry I really about no I'm not probably I'll get it right not again any guests wild guess last get is this a really big guy a little little white dude kinda tiny who's in your mind I'm probably wrong Tommy Tommy pistol mmm Oh brah Bryan ghazal well I like Bryan first of all I haven't watched anything by him okay so I don't know him but he's got don't care tattooed on his yeah kind of like that he's cool I'm sorry I thought that a job stopper I'm surprised he works because he I don't know a lot about him but he's really pushing it pushing it pushing it how so Wow I don't know what you mean there's no way I would have guessed him because I don't want you stuff but I thought what I what I've been hearing from people is they call him like wannabe max hardcore type of movies oh he's he's really pushing the women yeah aggressive aggressive and like there was always talk like it's it might be a little problematic for studia to carry his product because really he he pushed to the point where you might get invitation from the government and things like that Oh what I mean that's the rumor you know and about this guy yeah I might have seen someone a couple of things I didn't really care for his stuff but um okay you don't have to you don't have to humiliate the girl yeah have a nice scene you know right because that sounded very aggressive I didn't like the sound it sounds like this guy's kind of having a hard core fun yeah like when I used to listen because you know of course I'm comic first but when I'm when they tell me stuff like they grab the girl's head mm-hmm put it down the toilet flush the toilet and then all that guys that that's hot like I don't like god I'm talking to myself like guys it's okay to like the girl you know you don't have to do that [ __ ] you know yeah that's kind of my up my problem with some of the pornography today to like I don't really like the aggressive stuff if it doesn't feel consensual it's not exciting yeah and I think this is something you'll hear in that podcast last day of August sometimes girls I gotta be careful because I'm trying I'm trying to be fair with them but if you'll check depends on you having a good time or pretend you had a good time right you know you're gonna pretend like everything's cool ya know she can I ask you something always what did you have for breakfast today why Oh curious I have did I have what have you eaten today I had orange banana yogurt and toast oh that's pretty good breakfast it's not bad yeah is this a trick question no I know it's curious about you do you watch television shows yes I do what do you watch um I like I just so true detective season three how is it fantastic it is and went back to the classic form of season one highly recommended okay I'm gonna watch it it's it's great Tommy you'll love the documentary on Ted Ted Bundy no he tried watching it in bed the other night and I strictly no I snuck away and watched a couple episodes you did ya I've watched a few episodes obviously I love that and because I usually live in Tacoma Washington am I my uncle a lot of people still think he did it [ __ ] man it's a good guy and he's live in Tacoma Washington my uncle used to be attorney there so I have to go downtown and deliver documents to the court and sometimes have to deliver divorce paper which is not fun you know but somebody told me his mother still lives in Tacoma Washington so this is undies yeah the early 90s it may be a late 80s early night so whenever I had to deliver stuff I used to drive her neighborhood kind of sieve I saw her once walking out of the house it's creepy it's like good to but I just drove out of there they don't have you know what they don't have on the documentary I haven't finished it but the story because they they have it from when that when that journalist interviewed him and it was yeah in 80 you know so it's like going into trial stuff still appealing but in 89 right before they executed him when he realized the peels were all yeah he told them stories like in the in the in the documentary he's doing this like what if like yeah j-style thing like if I did it he's speaking in hypothetical terms they were able to convince him to talk about a finding as third person as third person yeah but in 89 when he realized I'm about to be executed right yeah he did the worst thing cuz you know I understand why there's so many serial killers up in Pacific Northwest because you almost running out of the place to run you're in a very corner of it and and you know there's tons of them over there and I think when he was fleeing from all the murders in Utah and Colorado and Washington stays Oh Manny he went other extreme to Florida but Florida it's a big on capital punishment so he made a mistake and what's crazy because he has a legal training yeah he's smart he had an option to just accept life sentence and he would have been you know but he I think he was delusional he really thought he could super narcissist yeah and get out of it so really was like the ultimate narcissist would you rather have hung out with Ted Bundy or oshi well you two are like Psychopaths buddies who you and Yosh major psycho no no Tom I told Christina before the show last year and a half people keep asking me who's bigger sociopaths a psycho you or Tom I'm not joking the [ __ ] makes sense yeah I beat up my stepmother everybody think I'm a psycho now yeah yeah she was a [ __ ] she had that coming though yeah from what I understand yeah but Tom's not a psycho sociopath cool see he hasn't hurt anybody yet but the the inclinations there you know fair enough are you going to big trouble for saying that word [ __ ] during the show no I am NOT do you know every where do you sign how do you sleep do you sleep at night it's it's tough yeah it's tough to sleep yeah I do that uh-oh you're are you up very perceptive I'm just trying to figure out what your what your day-to-day life yeah or do you what are you eating are you brushing your teeth twice a day yeah one of them I don't remember which podcast I said I need a place to stay and my friend realm run you know my friend well he's from now but hey you could stay for a couple days and there are being like for years Sadat and they lost July so lockout surfing you know yeah but it's it's really rare because in a way I have so much freedom because soon as I make money medical testing I go overseas do shows and like Scandinavian London I mean I don't make a lot of money but I travel a lot and I don't really worry about seeing something horrible to somebody because I don't have to worry about people swimming because I have no money to sue you know in a really weird way a lot of my friends with a lot of money and homes and family I guess I'm I'm envious of them sometime cuz it's nice to have right but family and Christmas hangout what you're saying you're free and and there's a certain joy in freedom to young untethered to those things yeah and you know sometimes I'll say I'm gonna go go to another city to do something do send me money like this guy sent me couple hundred bucks because I say I want to go Denver in April because it's the 20th anniversary and Columbine shootings I want to be I want to go there somebody for the anniversary yeah so whenever I sing a cool trip whenever whenever I plan a trip I don't want to go usual tour she plays you know like what would you do down the anniversary though okay I got to be careful don't miss your trip from I'm saying I'm helping my friend Alex Maier she's a writer in England I'm helping them with the project had something to do with mass shooting so I'm working on project so last 15 years whenever they're security in some gig I'm going there just happened to be shooting I'll go visit Sandy Hook or when I was in do annual what report on it to her I'm just kind of cure to check out what what was the scenario read up on it when I was in Denver last year I went to see a New England Patriots played the Broncos so I was there so I went to jump and they Ramsey's home I went to Columbine shooting I went to the Aurora snow theater Aurora a movie theater but most important I went to Greeley Colorado that the very place where modern terrorism started so I went there and check it out where Greeley Colorado yeah which is the location of what what happened was there with this mullah this political dissident from Egypt he was there trying to get him in Egypt so he fled he was visiting United States and 50s and he was so offended by young people dancing with each other in Greeley Colorado and he became he hated America because of that pop culture and things like that so he wrote his experience live in the United States in Greeley Colorado he became the father of modern terrorism he's the figurehead for al-qaeda Egyptian Brotherhood Isis and English I let's not say that stuff okay okay okay it's not welcome any if you are completely [ __ ] okay so anyways it therefore that that sounds sounds like a real good time yeah so there's any where you have dates coming up yeah where people find you yeah anywhere I'm doing this show in Brooklyn at the pipe full platform to saturday 8:30 p.m. no 1170 and Bushwick Avenue this is when this Saturday this out of there yeah okay go see oh she yes and I don't want to put you in a spot but it'll be cool if I could guess about one of your shows I'll be around but that you're doing it well yeah yeah well let us know when you're in what town yeah well when you're doing Tempe and when you do in Vegas happy that's those two shows up between my birthday let's see oh can we maybe get some prostitutes in Vegas or something all right anybody oh and the last days of August is on audible it's also gonna be available to the general public in April April or debbik is available in Showtime right now okay and I'm looking for female comedians if they want to work at Sunny Acres where I show wonderful call to action there yeah mm good luck shredders plenty of women they wanted is that that's that okay Yoshi thank you for stopping by can I do sorry I'm gonna be in Boston Sunday so if there's a place I could watch that Super Bowl let me know and then I want to tastic I want to thank my friend Mari Ravi kress even Joe they were very kind to me and it's nice that they're and where can somebody let you know on Twitter yeah Yoshi of Aichi Instagram it may be slow that down Yoshi obayashi do I spell that for the Arkansas since heart Y Oh Shi ole biessing boy aya Shi at Twitter and Instagram and want to thank my friend Johnny Darko Evo angel they're very kind hey Darko yeah yeah and Adrian [ __ ] check all right you know it's so lovely I'm so you seem happy and and I'm glad things are going well for you doing all these projects and thank you for coming back yeah thanks for your fans are great I'm not joking they're very very they're great they're green they're always don't any money you know you know they don't need to but very nice thanks guys it's great to see you Yoshi alright guys thank you to getting physical after this quick break so excited to bring back the og producer a podcast originator a pioneer if you will the one and only red band I love you so much because I feel like you're so juvenile and that you and I laugh and as Homme - but I don't know I like your Sensibility you're so juvenile you're the only guys that I don't feel bad talking about poop and stuff with ya you don't make me feel bad you shouldn't care like we were talking earlier in the we were in the conference room about the Seinfeld thing I think you guys are the only ones that really love we look we're on my side about that carbon our for people that don't know Seinfeld had not been to the Comedy Store in like 30 years and so he came to town he was out to dinner with Sebastian because they're buddies right and Sebastian was like do you want to do a spot like you must stop in the store and sign if it was like all right so Sebastian calls the club and is like Seinfeld coming and they're you know of course flipping out Jerry Seinfeld pops in does a spot an unannounced spot place goes bananas and then Seinfeld's like I'll do a little QA up here people start asking the most famous comedian of our time all these questions and then Brian well all the questions people were asking and like what's your favorite kind of socks you know like Oh white socks yeah yeah [ __ ] like that and then people around me were like dude somebody has something crazy you know it was kind of buzz I mean this was like 1:00 in the morning yeah and I was like all right fine and so ice I go hey Jerry do you wipe your butt standing or sitting down you guys what what'd you say about my wife you know like like he could hear me uh-huh and then I got a yell it again and he goes I'm right next to you you don't have to yo and I'm like oh you're not hearing what I'm saying that finally I said like the third time and he goes oh I wipe standing up of course and then I walk around like you could like all everyone like Sebastian like I think like everyone at The Comedy Store that work there was so upset with me yes I can't believe your ass didn't you wrap it up after your question no there was like one or two more questions okay but what was great is somebody recorded it and sent it to me the next day I have it somewhere in like an email somewhere but I mean you have to know as a big comedian that offering to take questions from the audience is a loaded weapon right you know you're gonna get a wild card you know someone's gonna try it on you like that do you like q and A's no yeah not really do you not do you know I never I don't I did I did one as part of a you know an organized QA in Toronto one at the festival there where they interview you and then the audience allowed to ask questions no I'm not into it yeah I always feel that within comics do that Q&A in like the middle of the sets they just not material so they're kind of just like well had Seinfeld done material yeah he did right after it was yeah yeah at least we know the answer I think that's kind of cool you know yeah wipes his butt standing up that you know people don't do that no and you go oh I don't you got that out of him yeah well I don't know I I think that the more I I mean this is probably gonna be horrible and you're probably gonna hate me for saying this yeah but I feel like the older I get and the more I realize we're all just humans the less hero-worship I have and the more I'm just like yeah whatever like I don't who's gonna give up loadable I feel like because I feel like you're a little my you would be more respectful towards Seinfeld's like I think that's really funny and I'm like yeah he's just a comic like nothing he's not very talented and super awesome obviously but I don't know I mean why were people upset with you is what I'm trying to understand cuz it's immature I talked about poop yeah I'm a comic and I'm like you know I'm almost like heckling and like it's Jerry and they're they're putting him on like a high pedestal now I probably know I would I guess I would do Steve Martin like I want to know that answer what Steve Martin you know but when I do it to Steve Martin probably not God probably like maybe it's in the hallway or something you know I'm not a yell you're gonna ask him in the hallway they see real quick what's that buddy do you wipe standing up or sitting down like I feel like you're more respectful than I am in that regard in that regard um I don't know I mean that's interesting I'm trying to think of like I don't an example doesn't come to mind you know yeah we got to ask that question to Jerry Seinfeld I would not have had the balls to know but if I were in the same room is that wouldn't happen as you I would have laughed really hard yeah I'd be like just like but I'm also the kind that laughed at the class clown you know why there was a guy from Tennessee who farted it during one of my lectures when I was studying at Oxford and nobody laughed except for me and like two other people one of the professor's recorded none of us we were in a lecture and this guy from Tennessee a friend of mine next to me he goes I Christina you dare me to fart and I was like [ __ ] yeah I did and he ripped one in the middle of this lecture is loud and it was loud in it it reverberated off the plastic chair yeah yeah and like only like a handful of people laughed and everyone else just ignored it and I was like how we got not gonna laugh yeah I mean I think you got a laugh of that in that case yeah yeah for sure a guy farting during a lecture yeah everyone has to laugh at that yeah if you don't laugh at that you something's wrong with you yeah yeah you're like British or something right yeah I've dated a girl though that was against farts and against hope and like my girlfriend now loves it it's her favorite thing when I fart like she doesn't get gross favourite things but she thinks it's hilarious like like if we're spooning and I fart on her crotch you know she's laughing her ass off instead of like most girls Blake are you [ __ ] kidding me yeah I like [ __ ] like that we saw a girl who would eat the farts yeah yeah yeah I know a girl in Orange County that that's just us fart porn and fart stuff you know a girl yeah I met her avian like three years ago and I was just going they have like all these booths yeah in Vegas like adult Video Awards whatever and she had fart porn and like I forget her name but God bless my butt yeah and that's all she does is farts in like like farts woof sex like farting dirty panty farts yeah it's a real lane that is that is a Elaine yeah yeah and it's like you're doing it already why not get paid for it right there's there's a market there too I don't understand why people don't think that because like poop emoji is one of the biggest things in the road right now like if I went to the grocery store and they were selling poop emoji like a stuffed animal type thing sure we have a pillow at our house yep emoji yeah that's ridiculous that my mom is going to a grocery store and seeing poop every yeah that's I think that great yeah I think so too take that stigma away now your girlfriend how long have you been together three years oh wow do you think you will get married well yeah absolutely I mean we're not in a rush though there's no reason to do it like god that's what could fart on these [ __ ] swiss case wow it sounds like we're maturing a little out well you're gonna marry her [ __ ] yeah yeah I like that answer she's like she's we haven't even had her first fight yet you know in three years I've never dated anyone where we haven't like gotten fights like at least once a month or you know that what does she think of your uh you know you're dating your ex-girlfriends is she well that's the best thing about her because I've met her and she was kind of a fan like she's seen every single Rogan podcast every single your mom's house death squad like she knew me through the women thyroid yeah and then I met her and when we first started meeting like I was like kind of nervous like about my past you know and she goes oh I know everything about you and I'm like that's right you do know everything about like everything about me more than people would that I've been friends with for ten years you know you ever think about what a remarkable like what a remarkable journey and story yours is how crazy it is where you are like yeah I mean oh yeah I mean cuz I because from what I remember like wasn't it that you had met Stanhope then you were doing some like vlogging or something for him yeah I I met Stanhope first before Rogan I believe yeah and I used to do his website I designed his website and then you're living still in Ohio Ohio yeah this was just me because I learned I learned how to do websites like the first year a AOL came out you know okay and well and no one knew how to make websites back then you know how old are you just uh this was probably when I was like 25 24 maybe less earlier than that and yeah so I would like reach out to people I like like Doug Stanhope and Rogan and like hey you know if I can help you in any way and so I would go to shows and film Doug Stanhope and make little videos for which are really good at yeah that is and this was before YouTube that like yeah I know but I've said like what you're editing rhythm and tone and choices it's bear your you have a skill in thanks man but yeah and so back then you didn't have like videos on your website like it was unheard of because right everyone had modems so I was really good at shrinking video so really small so you could have him on websites so I did it for Stan hoping that Rogan saw him I was like I want you to do my videos you know so then Rogan started flying me out and then one day you know Rogan just hired me and moved me out to California to do it full-time yeah the videos at first videos so you do a few of them he's like this is good yeah yeah yeah and it was great because you I don't if you remembered a story I was working at Gateway computers at the time and when I got when Rogan hired me I would had to put my two-week notice in and I was like hey you know can I talk to you I need to talk to you to my general manager and he goes you know actually I need to talk to you all so I'm like oh what the [ __ ] and he goes uh gateways closing so here's a severance package here's three thousand dollars and like I'm like what he's like what do you want to talk about nothing you know it was just how it lined up it was really magical is magical you know and then moved out here with the girl I dated for 11 years you know and then what yeah I was engaged and then you know it was weird like I did you know that right like no I know I I didn't know you prior to like I only knew LA red band well I don't know your history this is actually really funny so I moved up with this girl and you know we've been dating so long she moved to California with me she started give me an ultimatum like hey you know we've been dating ten years we got to get married um you know right because in Ohio years that's like a lifetime yeah yeah but Rogan was so anti-marriage yeah who isn't married you didn't you know like he was against marriage so I had to hide mine he's probably had like bits all those bids and about having kids we don't need any more kids you know going to free go in the 405 at five o'clock in the afternoon do you need duplicates you know he used to have like all his whole material was about not getting married and having kids have fun and so I had to hide it and then we ended up breaking up because she's like funny she's like I know you're hiding it from Rogan like you're not you're like ashamed and and and then like how I got how we got engaged was embarrassing because like she knew it was coming so I wanted to try to like hide it so she didn't like was surprised because she knew I was going to ask her to marry me or marry you know at any moment did you put in your bud no more embarrassing I went to a PF Changs we went to PF Chang's I just like anytime expect it if we're just going to PF Changs alright and so I'm in the car and we're about to go inside I'm like hey you want a piece of gum and she goes no we're about to eat and I'm like no no you want a piece of gum Arang she goes no let's go and then I'm like will you marry me like in the car with a parking lot of PF Changs and she's like really yeah okay alright and then there was like an hour wait and she's like my boyfriend popped the question the PF Changs parking lot how romantic romance I was just thinking of like shocking her yeah when you break up so you that engagement ends you get that ring back usually don't but she gave it back to me a nice girl and yeah I but except that like you know I had to borrow all this money that buy I was making at when I first moved out here I wasn't ready making any money at all I was living in Calabasas because I was like Joe we're shy to move he goes you really like Calabasas do you know and so and then when I gave to my mom she's like I like mom you know got the ring back and you hold it cuz I think I'll lose it did you ask your mom if she would marry you no but I my mom's house got broken into like a year later and they stole the ring so you're doing that and you're doing like kind of website stuff with him and then you don't you suggest the podcast well or how does that work well we were really into doing this thing called Justin TV like back in the days before you use no before it's twitch now yeah and they reached out to us and go hey we got this new thing where you could like stream live video and I was like this is sweet so I used to put the laptop in the green room to try to get Jo and Joey Diaz to like talk on it and stuff like that and Joe was kind of into it like he liked it Joey Diaz hated it like like one time Joey bent my finger backwards he's like okay you know like he hated it for some reason and then like me and Rogan were like we should just like do this like you know like once a week at Joe's house and so we did it like three or four times and then people are like you should like make this a podcast and so we just started taking the audio from like these Ustream videos and would make him a podcast and then like after like episode 10 we're like we should have invest in microphones and like like yeah yes sirs so like every week would buy new equipment yeah that's why like if the first maybe 30 episodes every week sounded different yeah and I had no idea how to do audio [ __ ] I mean I'm definitely on one of the first ten yeah yeah and I remember sitting on that couch in his office hey do you remember you were with us in San Francisco when we did one of the live streams in the green room I think probably yeah like the first time I met you yeah what year is this like oh nine yeah oh yeah yeah and I remember a member sitting on Joe's couch I always tell him because uh he'd be like come on sit forward man I'm looking my back yeah sit back right and then I was like I remember walking I would walk out with Brian I'd be like what the [ __ ] was that like why are we why are you guys doing this it's so weird for me yeah he's like yeah you know just I go are people listening this you he's like yeah I think so yeah because it was just starting right but it went fast though I'd probably say every week we're getting like 10,000 new people though and then yes pin it around like episode 10 or 20 it's just well this is serious you know yeah it was crazy how fast it happened though but the whole time I mean for years I would be on the road with Joe and every time we were in radio doing radio stations like morning radio every time he would just sit there for like three hours usually go in do your dates get the [ __ ] out of there and every time he was having so much fun although the DJ's we're like this is the best episode we've ever done of you know a radio program yeah we used to always go you need to do this you know where it lives he was really yeah he can talk he could talk that'sthat's the thing talk you can engage in conversation yeah yeah yeah yeah that's true that's true y-you saw also you know we would be there when I would do those shows you know he's there Joe's famous now for like the famously long podcast right and I would always be like you know like after like that 80 minute mark I'd be like are we still going yeah you know and then you'd end up doing sometimes these three hour podcasts but it's always because he could drive it right that loan yeah there was many episodes where I just sat cross-eyed like after like the second hour like now how are we still going yeah yeah but then when you're on his show it just goes by so fast yeah so engaging and like you get sucked into like warm now I mean I feel like back then you I don't know it's like a comedy podcast and now it's like a serious and that's a conversation that's just hot like I feel like the way it's done now is the way to do it and some of those early years are about figuring it out how to do it you know yeah like I was I used to feel like we were more trying to put something on for it and like now I just feel like we're just talking yeah yeah those are the best one yeah yeah were you so were you always a techy kid growing up well my dad was an engineer and so like I grew up instead of playing with toys a lot just playing with my dad's like electronics like circuit boards and soldering irons yeah [ __ ] like that and so I think because my dad he made me techie and then he bought me a computer like when they first came out and so I always had computers and I was always trying to learn how to do everything and to me it was fun it was because I was such a videogame guy that when computers got big like building my own computer and stuff I just yeah I guess I've always been a techie guy and now it's just out of control like I have like an addiction to technology it's ridiculous you're all we'd like since I've known you you're the guy who day one you're unboxing the new [ __ ] yeah yeah yeah now I what's the hottest [ __ ] which we'd be buying right now hottest [ __ ] right now yeah one of my friends just showed us Google home that was pretty cool Google home school I mean I have I have all the other ones like I have the Amazon alexa's and those I have the home pod home pod and I use that thing like twice yeah it's not the best I don't like serious stupid but Alexis smart yeah yeah the only bad thing I don't like is that I have one next to my bed and I didn't know how to camera it and then one day I just came into my room and the camera was on I'm like why is there's a camera why is this camera on so now I'm it kind of freaked out did you hear about the like what's going on right now with FaceTime on your phone no there's a bug where if I FaceTime you and before you answer if I add a second person if I add myself to it like if you type in your own phone number it will turn on your phone and you could listen in to whatever is on the phone or the camera will pop up and you can see what's going on without even the person doing anything I know it's kind of a serious book it's a really apples getting sued because I guess somebody did it while like in court and heard like the other person's like Jesus and they just just they just they stopped it somehow like Apple stopped it but it's so you can't do it now but for like weeks you could do that that's really creepy yeah well what's the future red man what's the next big thing well the arc VR yeah that needs to catch up a little bit more but being able to like you know feel like you're sitting right next to me during out this podcast and just like look over here you know Wow but you can kind of do it now we've tried so many times with like kill Tony and other podcasts I've tried but it's you know it's not there yet where it feels like you're really sitting there kill Tony blew up man you guys are killing it with that yeah yeah it's it's getting real real crazy yeah that's great you guys are gonna do a European tour yeah we're next in two weeks we're going to Ireland Manchester London doing that whole thing it's awesome in yeah okay I've never have you ever been over there yeah yeah how bad is that flight though that's ok cos annex I'm a sandy guy doctor guy really oh yeah I could yeah just sleep you wake up you're there have a drink watch some movies yeah he's an edible actually I wouldn't recommend you know I I had a bad a table right a bad edible on the way to Australia ones that is a long like you start you have a full panic yeah and you're like I only have 14 more hours yeah it's rough I wouldn't do that but ideas gave me a couple edibles once and I thought it would be a good idea like how to knock out I was in the middle seat it kicked in I thought was panicky dying going to the bathroom every 10 minutes excuse me can I good the bathroom yeah no good lashing water on my face terrible that was a nightmare yeah you don't do that but you do you can sleeping pill yeah alcohol a little wine some nyquil there you go yeah yeah it's not that bad man yeah how long will the whole trip be for you guys I think I'm there for like five days man yeah well I was going to I booked all these other shows and I was gonna stay there and I another week and in Edinburgh or whatever oh yeah but then at the last moments like you know what I'm already gone for five days I'll just come back you know in the summer or something like that cool yeah yeah you propose to your girlfriend are you thinking are you taking propecia why do you have such a nice girl I've always had this I just using their hats I mean what are you hiding this [ __ ] for I don't like to be noticed I don't know like I always like to have my hat on I don't know if you ever noticed I always have my head I always like to try to hide him why why what's the harder you're hiding feeling oh it's been that way I don't know why I've always been like the outsider look at this hair I know it's so lush too much full are you you're hairy right hairy back and everything the back is not that bad chest is full yeah red is splotchy it's a lot I have a question for you how soon after you make a bowel movement can you get into sexual play well I mean I've no I don't think I've ever done it or like I think right away I mean wet wipes wet wipes pretty much yeah you know whoa you're still on wet wipes well what are you guys yes are you kidding me you know I know I don't have the fancy the total wash leg a watch that's what you need to get I was gonna by the way the fire I texted you the other day if you had a squatty potty yeah I was gonna buy you guys one but then I remembered it you had this toilet and I was like they're not gonna they're just gonna throw it away well no we have a squatty potty in addition to the Toto wash let go working on into it yeah you know we have we have one yeah and it's you don't get you don't like that I don't like it I don't mind it I I mean it's cool it's not my favorite thing but I mean I've used it I'm addicted to it if I'm in a hotel room and I go [ __ ] I don't have my squatty potty have to make one out of the trash can and put those feet up yeah I bought squatty potty's for like five different comics you know like like dombarris and yeah it's Sandro and like I just buy him if I find out they don't have people don't have them yeah that's real nice that watch let is the way to go man how are you doing well I actually was looking into it but then I found out you have to put power to it yeah I get like a electrician and yeah I mean it's just a lot it's not own the place so it's like why my it's true but I mean once you have that sweet stream of warm water and cleaning up your beautiful raisin cake you're ready I love it so you don't even use wet wipes anymore right now no and I actually I kind of get [ __ ] to shower more now because I will dump and then just let that stream run mm-hm for like two minutes which is essentially the [ __ ] to shower concept yeah yeah and then like you wipe and there's nothing there yeah I still do [ __ ] the shower but I total wash let first oh yeah a lot but then I don't even go to wipe I just know that the todos taking care wow that is a bold and brazen yeah feel like I'm sure there's no charger there's no chocolate well because I've run it for a good amount of time and I feel confident that it's out so you're speaking away have you masturbated with your because you know women oh sorry Tom no women likes it in the bathtub and have like water sure yeah I always wondered and people just you know when Ryan my toilet is splattered with his Browns like there's [ __ ] cakes on the upper inner rim long it's not a good place that's not a fair it is true there's not cake okay it's cake for Kaka's yeah how many how many times a week do or how many times a week do you have diarrhea me yes are like we're never never never it's been months since I've had diarrhea go ahead well now I would say I'm good for a couple of week yeah really yeah week well back in the day I would say okay back in the day I would say like five or six days a week oh okay and then when I really started eating more like cutting much more sugar out big change big effect yeah now I Jill I'm not a big drinker I still will you know like I got sick a week but that's not I'm not always sick right so I got sick that was [ __ ] just torrential down like a tropical forest of [ __ ] but tropical shower but this is I would say on a regular week there's a couple like whoa what was that yeah but that's you know a few a week I'm sorry Jana I forgot yeah I had Korean food for lunch one day and then for dinner Japanese you had that in a bag and I had a messy Brown the next day but it wasn't diarrhea it was just really hot and messy yeah I have I have I think I'm good for at least two a week Oh what about you well I drink so you have to put that sure and I say like for a week maybe and they usually the morning after like a big booze night or something yeah usually that and it's like like fart like it just explodes like a bomb like that I get almost it almost feels like a turd scumming out and then a fart goes in the middle and blows it apart the whole thing goes away but your suicide bombers yeah is that what you sound like it's more violent than that more violent than I'll record it for you I think I really think I have IBS is that what's going yeah because I mean it's it's it's power like you want to check that out or no I I kind of like it kind of like IBS know I kind of like just having it come out really fast you know poof and really like this idea yeah but it's probably the drinking I'm gonna go yeah what are you drinking did you find did you feel like real you know beef when you met blue band always thought he was just that evil well yeah a person takes a representation of them yeah that's cool yeah Metamucil I don't know if you ever taken that did you talk about Metamucil before I'm sure we have okay cuz I couldn't remember who told me about it and then one day I was like I saw at the store I'm like I think Tom and Christina talked about this and I bought it it is it's magical it is great yeah the only thing with Metamucil is that when you have to go it's an emergency you better be near a toilet right you can't hold it in right so you got to kind of plan your day you know plan like eight hours after you take it yeah you know what I haven't had lately though like maybe a year is a lochness [ __ ] you know like one of the ones that you're like how is this not broken apart you know like I used to get those at least once a model is those are but those are for healthy need to be angry I think it's healthy don't you wait blok messed up where he's saying it's like the lock monster yeah real long one you're like how is this so good oh yeah those don't come that often either yeah I used to get him a lot though really yeah I think it when you if your diets clean you'll see that more yeah it's good eating yeah no drinking some salads yeah and I found it's also if I really get jacked on caffeine if I drink like white lightning like I get real weird and then I hold in the duty for a while and then it'll be like a long way oh really it's a really nice story too how many times you guys go to bathroom per day because I think - my out of control I'm going to go back what's your average day I would say seven times the [ __ ] [ __ ] no your everyday you need to go to a doctor really yeah yeah yeah are you being truth I've been truthful how much blood not as much anymore but when I started keto that kind of went away so I'd probably say once a month no like three times a month you have some serious blood yep it's all in a row like cuz it's it's a hemorrhoid yeah sure you see the red on the paper it's over your hand it's soaking through the hand it's good to recycle your blood though I thought if you haven't seen a doctor have you had have you had no self care you know that now they changed its they change the American Medical Association changed the suggested age for a colonoscopy yeah you know that yeah they moved it to 45 well I had one like four years ago what and they were like things are cool yeah they said everything you'd like like I got a full physical gots a bit like you got a colonoscopy or like yeah what fingered me I don't know that's not cool what's closed that's when the the GI specialist goes in with and checks you out with a camera and like this is the one where they put like some kind of weird thing to open up my butt and they look inside and what yeah the physician didn't do that to you yeah that's when they found out at an internal hemorrhoid and they did that with rubber band litigation or whatever it's called wear their tie a rubber band really yeah that was the worst thing that's to kill the hemorrhoids yeah and you're supposed to come back like two more times but after the first time I was like no I'm never doing that again we still much pain I ever had in my life really it felt like somebody was pinching the inside of my [ __ ] like like just like non-stop and there was nothing you could put on it like I tried doing pain ring uh-uh it was just like getting a titty twister in your [ __ ] where was this doctor was this in Koreatown more special okay okay here's a funny sight so you ever do those like 24mm or night 24 seven times a day you're [ __ ] yeah yeah you're sick no yes it's healthy to poop not seven times a day something's wrong really every day's like this yeah really yeah yeah I got there a wet wipe every two days like a package wait speaking of wait let me what do you think of this what do you think's going on with this wiping technique right here okay pull this up what was this guy doing just if you can watch it's all in the shadow work look look how he's going back and forth back and forth oh my god back and forth right that is weird maybe smelling I think I think he's doing back and forth and back I think he's passing the paper around left hand right hand Oh like a basketball or like a ball it's it's hard to see maybe it's just a crazy person - I think he's doing rapid checking what he's like is there still chocolate there and he looks he looks and he looks back oh that was a multiple that's crazy so I have a local I have low blood pressure yeah and I got one of those sounds like there's a lot of good things yeah healthy as a horse no like my physical is like you just need vitamin D that's it and but I have a little blood pressure they've always told me I had a low blood pressure and so I tried to do one though it's like DNA test where you have to prick your finger and then put five spots on that piece of paper and I couldn't get any blood out in like a mini squeezing it and squeezing it you couldn't get blood I couldn't like it like and I tried multiple fingers I try to give my finger warm so then I just waited - I had a blood toilet thing and then I just used that you use your [ __ ] blood damaged you used your ass yeah it's ever there was a lot I mean like when you wipe it's all over your hands I just like took its wipe you it's all over your head sometimes it's really bad pools of blood it's like my whole hand like the whole paper towel is just red I think you need a psychiatrist now I've talked to Ari everything's fine do you live at a shelter now yeah what is come with you yeah do you guys don't have internal hemorrhoids no I know I've seen I've seen a little like a streak before paper where you're like oh I think that's just dry wiping or something maybe I put pools of blood when I got my hands soaked Ematic I murdered somebody my hemorrhoid some some are bigger some stops my girlfriend she calls her hemorrhoid pinkie it's disgusting I hate okay she went to go get it checked out and they're like oh no you have a very small one you could just keep that one mine is like that one mine is a pretty decent sized one why are you getting these are is your diet so bad that you're pushing a lot or is that hard I feel like my hemorrhoids went away because I don't eat I eat a great a pretty decent diet and I don't push out the Browns I don't think they go away I think you're gonna track they don't and if you're eating clean though it would definitely help way less right now my guy he's cool you know but like in like maybe a month he'll come back out you'll get fill like a bubble inside of me God just takes a heart turd to pop it okay okay how about can we do the updated physical again can we yeah I need to I guess I mean the IBS [ __ ] well yeah and like at now like once you're in your forties it's you should do a yearly physical that's the normal sit right that's the healthy thing to do yeah please yeah I will all right God promise man you guys know you'll be grown-ups yep that you're an adult ish you got it act yeah you grow man guys got pools of blood I know what the [ __ ] every day just once you know me Ari does it to all the time he's got a problem Ari ghosts the doctor doesn't he I don't I think he goes about as much as me no I think oh yeah actually deals with the problem he sends me texts photos of his wipes and it's just like blood it's really crazy yeah we used to always send each other back and forth whenever we had her at Blood Moon and yeah to see if we were synced up and sometimes we both had it at the same time wow that's really neat I feel like you know red band really he put it out he had a he was a he's got a prolific dating history there's a lot of girls that were like like like special girls poor girls are you doing some porn girls yeah what was that like for you porn girls well they were lesbian porn girls so it was a little bit better oh yeah how's that because they're not getting drilled by god yeah exactly and it was kind of hot you know so you were turned on by it yeah now but but did you because the whole thing about like it when you really get into that world as you you kind of discover that like this is their job so did it feel like it was robotic that they're like I shot a scene with this girl today yeah it was so I never sent like that so it wasn't like this oh my god that's so hot because it's a like a show they put on yeah and there was nothing sex like you think you have in your head like a lot porn stars like this and that and then when you actually see what they do you're like wow this is really [ __ ] and fake you know like like they like you they they barely ever come or like but they act like they're coming you know and [ __ ] like that I mean and it wasn't that but like I I thought it would be really jealous and crazy about it but it wasn't as bad as I thought at no time I ever got jealous is when like she's like well I have a photo shoot with this dude on top of a building I'm like who's this guy you know yeah that kind of stuff well what was why would the guy be there if she's doing lesbian or he would be the photographer oh you know because those guys are always trying to [ __ ] the girl of course and so that's the only part that I hated about the whole thing yeah I know it's pretty cool I mean I ended up dating a couple of them and then I dated a boy girl porn star and that that was hard that you mean and so yeah how does that go well I'll tell you one of the worst things that yeah yeah okay yeah so she was known for getting drilled like bad in like just national and anal are ya what this is an anal day well let me ask you this before you even get to the story mm-hmm would you would there be like is it the kind of thing where like Sunday you know that she's working Tuesday and Thursday that week you know I mean like was there build-up to things would you know tomorrow you worked every day every day this girl I don't want to say who she is anymore but this girl was one of the top girls and she was working multiple movies every single day god I'm still doing it no now she's out of it now that's why I don't talk about it but that's but she was known for getting drilled she was known as one of the more extreme girls like yeah kind of like a nossek here you know type girl okay so she had an anal day and usually I know this today before no I think I knew this that day like like I was like what happened tonight no I got [ __ ] announced by two guys and then I saw them really but I was caught so dead inside that like in this relationship like I don't even know how I did this but and usually she would come home and like shower she had like a thing in her shower to actually just cleaned her [ __ ] out and like kind of like a douche stick I don't you know what it was called it was just connected to the shower was weird and she got off and she's like she's like I'm ready pick me up I got a cool party we're gonna go to and so we went to slash US House of Guns & Roses and because she was friends with his wife at the time okay where they got divorced okay in /this house is this huge mansion half of it is just a nightclub it's just like being in a nightclub they have full bouncers bartenders deejay he's like 60 right yes yeah it was ridiculous and we decided to do Molly she had never done for him like ecstasy before you know so she's like let's do X D and go to his parties and let's see what happens with all he's rock star right right yeah so uh so we we do ecstasy she's never done it before she is God she's just like I wanna [ __ ] so bad so horny and I was like let's go outside we go outside and there's a sign like do not go past this gate you know that party wasn't you're not allowed going up this yeah so we go past the gate and it's his pool area and there's this big Bush by the pool and we go in the bush to hide and I just start eating her ass out and I'm forgot about the the the what she did that day before right [Music] and I'm eating her boy is she's uh oh my god I can't feel my butt and I can't feel my mouth and she accidentally [ __ ] farts a [ __ ] into my mouth I go mom and I taste it like you like you know how like how you like it I mean it's in my mouth at this point and I'm like I don't want her to know that she did this so I blew it into her butt and then I start wiping my face off on her butt and I remember her she just had smears all over her play she couldn't feel that I blew it back into her and then I drank pool water because I was so disgusting oh I'm traumatized all right well thanks for stopping by just when you think the show can't get you thought Uncle Terry bring Brian I didn't think the bar could go high you thought we would like the story yeah of the woman into your mouth and then you pushed it back into her [ __ ] yeah was there you're sure what say was there see um on the poo what oh I I couldn't see cuz it was so dark but I knew it do you taste it that was the weird thing oh I'm gonna [ __ ] don't even know you're like how do I know it like maybe I had a bad wife and I itch to my nose at one point or in my lip and I tasted before like I I remember I was like this is a familiar taste and what did Brown taste like goddammit that might have been the most perfect drop ever at this moment I can't remember what table what does brown t he never told her the rest that you never to list I've never told her this story and she put her she had to know something happy know who it is had to know what something happened cuz she put on her clothes and her butt had like I mean I wiped my [ __ ] you know but I did [ __ ] and then you know I win but after that oh yeah at that moment at that moment I grabbed some pool water who switched my mouth out and started [ __ ] her and damn in her butt no no guys you are a savage yeah I was on Molly man I had no idea what I was doing so you forgot about drugs yeah and then you guys went back to the party yeah that [ __ ] [ __ ] all those smeared all over her yeah not on there outside of her pants I don't think right I don't really check I just remember when she put it up I was like that's a lot yeah I think morton's might pull out a sponsor [Laughter] I'm like I'm wiped from that story I think I need a nap after that I'm pretty tired call my therapist I mean have you never I guess never mind I don't know let's talk about you guys have any general updates I need to go to the dentist it's been a while actually I have to get a cleaning dad yeah I gotta get a couple teeth replace huh my two front my two front teeth are fake and yeah mine too and because of all my IBS acid reflux I'm sure like that it's just burnt teeth I think it is it acid reflux or reflux I don't know whatever it's reflux Duran Duran elementary so your two fronts are they totally fake or their veneer their half totally fake one of them my right one is supposed to get replace like 20 years ago it was like this is a temporary do you have a 20 year old temp - yeah how is that thing lasted gentle it doesn't I don't know he'd see us like [ __ ] it falls really small just show me she's shy that once attempt yeah either one it just looks like bra yeah you got a go I don't have dental insurance I should six-pack nobody does [ __ ] pay for it why does no one have dental insurance it's kind of a rip yeah often do you need it that's true you can pay you just skip a new [ __ ] yeah just pay for that that's true yeah yeah go the doctors and dentists everything yeah and we want you to tell the doctor that cool story like in shock right now I feel bad don't feel bad no it's a great story yeah it's neat it's real beautiful did you watch the fire fest Doc's I watched both of them I only seen the Netflix one it's I highly recommend watching the who the one the who the ones way more interesting in my really slay the hula ones the only one that actually interviewed the main guy throughout the whole thing yeah yeah and it's very interesting seeing his side of it and it is it hurt he's a total [ __ ] psycho he is but it's still kind of it's cool because the other one you just see clips of him walking in doors and yeah yeah or this one you're actually like he kind of talks about it and it still makes you hate ja Rule though like well that was my question is that how did he come out of this pretty unscathed I feel like that guy took the rap on all of it yeah yeah I don't get I don't get that part but Java I don't have you been following Joe everyone it's Twitter though it's kind of interesting what's he saying I don't know he's been posting things and then deleting him I think he's like a stuff fraud memories like it's not fraud just like false advertisement for exposure boy no yeah a little bit like he starts selling all these like like he pretty much went to this Web site where you can buy like these fake like video game consoles they're not fake but they they play stolen software like you can buy one that has like every single Nintendo game on it right yeah and it's like 20 bucks on this like Chinese website you know buy out got 100 of them if you want so he bought all bunch of them slapped his name on it and called like the Soulja Boy video game system charges like 150 250 dollars I mean it's just so imperative software on them and like Nintendo is like is suing him or something like two weeks but he's selling all this crap on his website that's just all these knockoffs like he's sucking like a fake apple watch he's like yeah it's happening so I'm thinking like how is he selling all this stuff like it doesn't he have money and then I realized like he's always holding up stacks of money on the same website you could buy fake stacks of money and you know it's not illegal to buy it it's illegal to try to use it but you can like walk around and hold these all this money all you want so that's a big thing now though just holding the stacks stacks of money and you the phone call with the staff yeah absolutely idea yeah well there was a we've all seen it now but for people that haven't there's a great part in this film where they're talking about for people that don't know fire fast was this this catastrophic failure of a music festival that was that they job role was a partner in it and they attempted to host this on a Bahamian island with no infrastructure and bring in some of the top music acts and that you know they they promoted the hell out of it they sold out tickets in advance millions of dollars in revenue and basically nothing was ready of course for this because they tried to make it happen in just a few months and one of the things as everything was falling apart they realized some of the basic needs weren't ready to go for instance there was a huge semi full of bottled water that was like stuck at a port or you know some customs person and I guess word was that the guy in charge was gay so the guy who was running this fest asked one of his consultants to actually go and visit him I think this is a clip we have of that did Andy ever tell you how he had to get the water huh oh yeah did he tell you about I ought to get the water out yeah it was like [ __ ] crazy I'm not gonna talk about that let me tell you something we had four containers fill four team wheeler trucks filled with Evian water but I had left the week before for two days to go to meetings in Bermuda for the America's Cup and when I came back I'd missed the big meeting with customs and of course customs had said to Billy in the gang do you need to pay us a hundred and seventy five thousand dollars in cash today for us to release the water I went down well Billy called me I'm gonna speak completely you know this won't go that far I'm sure but they called and said Andy we need you to take one big thing for the team and I said oh my gosh I've been taking something for the team every day said well you're our wonderful gay leader and we need you to go down will you suck dick to fix this water problem and I said Billy what they said Andy if you will go down and suck Cunningham's dick who's the head of combat the customs and get him to clear all of the containers with water you will save this festival and I literally drove home took a shower I I drank some mouthwash I'm like oh my gosh I'm really and I got into my car to drive across the island to take one for the team and I got to his office fully prepared to suck his dick but he couldn't have been nicer names like Andy listen I will release all the water I will let you serve it but I want to want to be one of the first people to be paid this import fee for what you're doing and I said okay great and I got back and I had all the water that we need it best clip ever I mean yeah that guy for my customs I'm sure is happy to have that out there of course yesterday he was like you want me to what remember he doesn't seem to hesitate too much oh yeah yeah well yeah I mean this he was he didn't even have at least in this story he's not like I was deeply troubled yeah he's just like suck a dick all right just go down and suck a stranger like you wanted to do what what time is it like totally just like I went home I took a shower put some mouthwash I went there to suck you guys do what's a big what would you would you suck at someone's dick oh well hold on all right there's a lot of money involved now well hold on how much 20 grand now 25 grand now serious not know $100,000 whoa no no you could watch that - who's not much money man 100 grand and cash no that's not much money that's a lot of money you could buy it why are you saying 100 grand is not a lot of money because 100 grand is not a lot of money what are you talking about you have a hundred grand sitting around yeah Rockefeller know but to me that's not enough money to suck a dick oh I would say will you jack a guy off for a hundred grand no Jesus man what you know but it's not like maybe but I mean I mean two hundred thousand to suck a guy's dick now Jesus I would say maybe a million but probably not [ __ ] no you jack a guy offered and that's how much - fifty grand No oh yeah that's your hand yeah I don't want to even be there so you don't want to be there but he's gonna reward a million dollars cheap gay for me man I don't like that gay [ __ ] you Jack the guy off onto the back of your knee look I don't I don't even like being in the locker room at 24 hour fitness you know like I don't like it you're that homophobic I'm not homophobic I just like open yeah I probably been like that like in gym class like in like old like elementary school or high school and stuff I skipped the whole locker room Eric like I never you know I'm not like Bert Kreischer I'm taking off my shirt you know I sit like that no one but yeah yeah so if I might the CEO guy or whatever like I don't think he needed the gig that bad like you know what I mean he was an established person in his career he's not like a young this guy yeah I miss the dick sucks ya know ya know that's kind of weird yeah I know that's like I know but it's like it's like this question my there's the the person who's like all right is like 1819 right Nutella just young and reckless this is like a gentleman you know this guy it's like well I think honestly he's just playing a little character right there they got back he has a boyfriend or something but to him he was like [ __ ] you I'll suck a guy's dick I think I think it's just it's also permission to do something like that you know it's like well I'm doing it for the my business like for the click the boss man asked me like he thought that guy was cute anyways maybe it was like all right maybe wow I can't believe right bands like nah I won't Jack a guy off for a quarter million dollars I barely like you now would you for $250,000 jack a guy on job tom you would not do that no but I mean you would not do that why would you I know Burt would oh yeah yeah Burt likes hanging out with guys that's his whole thing like your parties and you know I barely like hanging out with guys you know like would you jack a guy for half a million dollars five hundred thousand dollars to Jack a guy up cash it's not that serious you Jack yourself off what's the difference yeah put your hand on another dudes thing I probably do it for $500,000 Jack Jack a guy off night yeah put your mouth on it right you guys spit you just spit your hand obviously but that's not like yeah yeah five hundred thousand be fine all right and then you just rub the there's not gonna be a guy that's gonna walk in this room right now I hope it's our new sponsor you wouldn't you you rub it in like you rub the jizz into like your stomach but then you're done rummages and here's them yeah that's a different level that's not tapping it that's not definitely the deal yeah you're not eating fine your eyes is it filmed no no do I get to pick the guy well you get a pic out of you get it you have options there's like five options well you know I've been I met Brad Pitt the other day I've been hanging out with Brad Pitt yeah I've been hanging out with it no I if I had two options if I had like one of each race and I could really yeah you're going on racial yeah because I'd rather I'd rather do an Asian guy why because I could look at him and think my girlfriend and a problem I got to his office fully prepared to suck his dick okay yeah I would you you would blow or jack off the Asian Jack off an Asian guy your ranged that we just have to get a sponsor no it's weird cuz like I mean if it's an Asian guy like a Korean eight I could probably do it wait he's or in if it was like a white guy or a black yeah easier did you hear it I just fired a little one it was we had Zankou again for lunch yet a good part no it wasn't good it was little we are the fart supremacist you won't try the fart Mike at all times I try all the time that's true I wish I had one right now I know so do I you could be the first guest ever to use the fart Mike yeah lay on your side to make it come out it gets guaranteed if I if when am I in bed if I flip from like the right to the left yeah you make art yeah you're [ __ ] seven times a day yeah how can you not produce a fart at that I've said twice already today and I woke up at 10 a.m. telling your life I have some would you rather x' for a Brian Redman let's do it are you ready okay what was that was that that was Terry no Terry I'll slow down stop would you would you jack a guy off for 500,000 no oh come on that's half a million dollar occasion you crazy mm-hmm well not like hiyoshi - I'm talking about like a clean one a nice Asian guy mm-hmm $500,000 I mean the only reason I would do is just I can move yeah that's pretty you can move on $100,000 you can't um where are you moving to you you can't there's a house right next to my like there's a rundown house it's a 2-bedroom 1-bath rundown house the woman had Alzheimer's it was all nasty they kind of remodeled it a little just repainted it and I was like it's for sale I'm like that house can't be that expensive it's just a small little shack 1.4 million dollars right okay but you're saying to buy a house yeah I'm just saying to move and rent that's doable and yeah this guy's gotta be Asian now in the scenario no no you could choose the race I just chose Asian cuz I ever first cuz chose you I think would be easier why would it be easier because no I'm not just trying to hear your rationale for it now I just think that would be easier than doing it what would you what racer jeez I'm just saying like you wouldn't do the black I know that would be my least of all the races half a million because that's too scary for me a black guy yeah that's it but it's a hand jam you know you know how like hairless this asian guy would probably be and then what is the black guy covering off you know yeah purple veins and [ __ ] oh that's great you get it we heard it but we weren't on you yeah which race would you choose I mean I don't think I would do something like that five hundred thousand dollars you wouldn't seriously I don't think so she's just a [ __ ] I know but I mean this theater tours going pretty well yeah but no it's not films yeah that is half a million dollars for it's [ __ ] five minutes of your life and then you talk about it in therapy and you're done yeah okay I don't even think he would have to go to therapy I think I would you know for a [ __ ] or you're getting all this money you're like yeah that was worth it yeah making it I would jack all those five dicks all the races for five hundred thousand wait now you've given out free ones no a hundred thousand per race he arrived races what I'm saying you can get five hundred thousand per race oh okay yeah where are you giving out flyer I didn't know that isout do all five how much would it cost for you to go down on Amy Schumer Oh forgot after a workout where's Dobbs she's pregnant all right okay so now Leslie Jones after workout how much would it cost what are you doing other comedians it's not fair any woman I don't any woman oh but that's going down is different than hand jobs that's way more intimate right yeah that's pretty interesting a lot it's a lot all right how much would it cost mmm what about Stu who do it who's the person do I get to pick I choose the person I get to control their height just over 70 oh it's not [ __ ] up okay I'm gonna do would you rather just for you right yeah let's do it custom-made for you Brian red band okay would you rather you're gonna go into the Marine Corps active duty okay and we're gonna station you in Afghanistan and not like a nice marine base like leather neck or Bagram like you're on a Forward Operating Base a fob and there's no cement it's just dirt and you're [ __ ] into wag bags and throwing your bags of [ __ ] into fire and you're out patrolling maybe you know you go on foot patrols to come back but here's the upside okay every now and then you get a nice MRE with some treat in there you know your foods okay maybe you get to go to like a nicer base and have like at a British base where they have like lad mags and the PX so you get to like choke your chicken whenever you want so like there's that kind of benefit okay so it's it's that or you live as a Buddhist monk it is not that's it yeah why you even sounds more relaxing more peaceful interesting definitely you know what you're doing all day you're waking up at 4:00 in the morning and you're just meditating sounds awesome seriously you're making mandalas you're eating a bowl of rice a day oh stop it I could easily be a Buddhist monk Isle of meditation and route like sleeping you know you're not people at ism I like their food they don't sleep a lot you're waking up at the crack of dawn you're meditating you're helping the poor maybe sweeping up the whatever you're having an awesome garden and stuff like that it's great oh you are a would I think that sounds I make you'd be on base yeah you would put asking you I'm asking you you would take between Afghanistan or the the monastery the monk thing they're two different forms of torture is what I'm saying yeah internal battles do you sit around meditating and with your own thoughts one is a literal war zone and the other one is a little fun you getting war he gets shot at now what no I'm just kidding you just see action in one when is an external threat and the other is an internal threat that's a good way of putting it I think Buddhists are adorable so I would choose that okay when you see them at the airport like they're the only religion that I'm like oh what are you be talking about over there have you ever tried meditating yeah I meditate all the time real yeah why are you doing this all right what would you take Tom Salaam I mean in this scenario it's like I think it's without question okay monk you're not gonna be able to bang listen guys and we're standing this like it's a little cloistered life you're not going to have women there's no choke in your chin anyone's butter there's no eating but there's no video games when you're a Buddhist monk could still masturbate with no one you're in a [ __ ] room with other monks dude they don't do that stuff oh this bathroom you know into it in the bathroom he's gonna find a way to check off babe yeah they all jerk-off but it's an entire life of service to other people and there's no girlfriends there's no silliness there's no I get what you're saying you know what I mean it's a serious life Brian yeah I'd rather did he's ready live this life man yeah seriously I've already I mean I've ate [ __ ] I don't want to do any more of that like I'm I'm a totally different person than I was like five years ago I wouldn't I believe you I believe you and Tom what did you say I'm yeah I know I might do a tour in Afghanistan [ __ ] but then it's over and then you get your life okay really understand that kill some Hajis the enemy tom okay here you go would you rather never have an orgasm again but you get to eat whatever you want oh and what happened or you get to have orgasms but you only eat a vegan gluten-free organic diet sugar free dairy free no alcohol no cigarettes I'm talking carob chips maybe some kale chips for snacks like it's a pretty grim eating and lifestyle existence and you have to exercise this one's really particular to when you're processing the question because right basically your does your sexual needs decline as you there's an age where you're gonna be like the diet right Brian is really mulling this over because know what his needs are you said you said too much weight I wouldn't want to have that diet you know right and I wouldn't want to have cigarettes or alcohol like I would not want to do all that [ __ ] and so I'd probably do whatever would I don't want to do that one whatever that is okay so you're saying that you would rather choose never to have an orgasm ever again what you want yeah yeah yeah that's what I'm saying well that's because you're of this age if I ask you when you're 23 oh no no I still come like four times a day so it's like okay I'm saying in this ridiculous hypothetical but it's not necessary yeah you come four times a day yeah usually really depends my girlfriend's working right now yeah every day yeah okay I have a huge sex drive style definitely that's what I'm saying I know he's all driven wait so if your sex drive is that is that high right now then how could you possibly give it because it's like the the masturbating thing is more alike you compulsively masturbate still yeah like I'll just be like and boy oh I can masturbate yeah and that's happening multiple times multiple times a day I mean my penis is calm is pretty sweet you will have that cam web site I always go to is pretty sweet you need therapy so much there it's so much help yeah yeah I'd love to sit in on one of your sessions oh my god I'd love to sit in on a session with you oh yeah listen to your hey maybe you could come on dr. Drew's new show oh love to yeah would you would you be open and honest about heck yeah yeah that's pretty good I'd like that I would love that let's arrange that okay and I've always wanted to meet him I love that guy let's do that all right yeah he should talk to him yeah I'm doing it so you choose sorry you would choose no she's not coming eating what I want Wow interesting yeah I think that's way I mean you live once you can't just have a [ __ ] vegan crap diet the rest of your life and they'll gluten and be super healthy yeah no but there's a point where it's like okay yeah I can see myself accepting that one in like a few years and I I would like be like nah not right but like if you if you're like do you think in ten years yeah I'd be like different dude don't take this yeah clean diet yeah maybe in ten years in ten years yeah I mean I had beet chips the other day oh good you're at beet chips no get him now okay another one fresh beats you know I have a filler up sealer shut really yeah we haven't done it in think we have that and he's been a while the new filler up just got to play it a little faster yeah that's how I get away with [ __ ] on a kill Tony now really I play it just like 25% faster and no one note you hasn't even ever said anything about it like hey what's that song you just played you know that directs well I'm doing a filler up seal her shut cool guys edition which means we're only doing males cuz there's no female cool guys yet okay so what we'll explain it in a minute so fill er up celosia which one would you rather I guess have filled this person would fill you up and seal you shut um yeah usually would you rather get it done by Terry Uncle Terry okay or the four stroke guy that's who we're gonna debate here yeah okay I will consider I don't know if you can even pull those up but I will consider I would have to go definitely with Terry Terry was fun Terry's fun he is he's upbeat he is yeah he's like I think he's always like he if you had a party and he lived in a complex you'd invite Terry to come over yeah he's a very fun-loving here's Terry Terry right here so I wanted to use this vibrating toy that I bought that's new and I thought I'd try that in and then I also wanted to try this Devlin did flex leave that has these like massive bullets in them I haven't used it of course and then I went to look and they didn't send any batteries so bad I'm not gonna be able to use the vibrating part but and then I got this cool ice a friend of mine he had one and he [ __ ] it with his boyfriend and it's a double-ended dude so I really want to try this but first I'm gonna try and get this in my butt and then turn it down and it's getting got this cool little free ball control and just see what happens okay it's got a nice texture to it no it'll be easy to go in foot it's always the foot in his face it's got a nice built-in back frame which I thought was kind of cool that's call but it does have kind of a good sized head take me a minute we got to eat it yeah I haven't had anything in my butt since my last but toy video okay all right you get the gist yeah so wait what so would you rather have that guy do you right or the guy who smokes meth with his brother you don't need Lube we don't need speed yeah guys seems pretty clean which one come in four strokes this guy eject oven forged wrote this is him I don't know so this guy is also an option for you if you've had any kind of erectile this order problems I'm here to say get that bag forget about South let's forget that dick and plants and all that stuff so I don't know if you believe me or not but if you like to see me smoke cement with a small limp dick didn't get hardening it away and watch it you're harder and harder more I've smoked harder my dick Gibbs it's unbelievable your [ __ ] becomes so sensitive that you don't need Lube you don't need spit you just stroke that [ __ ] just up and down four times it's better to do it and you'll shoot an enormous amount a very thick dick okay so now here's what you gotta weigh like the other guy is very open bright you know he's got like a well lit up place here a cleaner he's naked and he's just like hey I like toys in my ass he's kind of you know puts it out there this guy's a little more about that kind of that dungeon life no more hidden dirty dick this guy's there's math involved and you're gonna go for Terry Uncle Terry sure they're both gonna come pretty fast you said Terry okay guys yeah yeah if you have to choose one then you choose the first guy obviously no I might choose the math guy no you wouldn't what I would just cuz it's more interesting and interesting well I mean he's on drugs so it'll be funny aids and stuff oh well we'll use protection it's fine yeah you would I know you would know I wouldn't find you draw eject open for yeah yeah there you go just for you Brian thanks guys I hear welcomes we would love to see you do that know what you're gonna get a bunch of money I swear to God you heard you got some kind of alternative motive right now what are you talking about what do you mean cuz you you you doing all this gay stuff on oh no I just happen to go that way where I didn't yeah it's not intentional totally man have you ever seen a guy finger his penis hole okay Rob Rob Rob you ever see a guy [ __ ] a girl's [ __ ] like hole people oh my god all right an actual thing um this is uh really neat now it's so fun to hang out with you man it's been too long thank you guys wait working is anything on sale that's not sold out I know you have all these shows coming up anything we can engine yeah if you just go to death squad TV click on tour dates we have a bunch of shows that are being added all the time great I would just sort out filly but they're adding a new second shovel what are you doing there kill to kill Tony's in a row and then great yeah we have we're going all over where you guys doing it Helia yeah that's William Philly's one of the best man yeah I love I love that that's a great clip racer they're all good but yeah doing a lot of that doing a lot of other shows but yeah awesome red band our original producer creator the sorry for crossing you guys out I feel like I really had disappointed you and not at all really you know not a lot phases you guys saw ghost this is fun but when you come back I do want a doctor update all right yeah we'd really like for you to get checked out yeah so don't forget death squad TV for that Christina added a midnight show in Denver at Comedy Works downtown Saturday Saturday make sure to get that I put what's the newest one we added that show the 28th of April in Boston at the chevalier and there's a shows coming up in Long Beach shanty nez and Reno all the shows for me are Tom cigar.com slash tour and for Christine yes there's Tina P online all right dot-com today it was a lot of fun don't forget oh here we go with closing song this week is it's called I'm trying to see the name it's called Julia it's me and by Nathan B thanks so much for listening we'll see you guys next week [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Applause] [Music] then from jail homeless [Music] I'm your mom and you're my son and I I'm your mom and you're my son and I I'm your mom and you're my son and night just like the gate is there you know yes I would longer read everything [Music] along with their own everything [Music] [Music] [Music]

Channel: YourMomsHousePodcast

Views: 851,039

Keywords: ymh, your mom's house, your moms house, tom segura, christina pazsitzky, christina p, mommies, jeans, up, high and tight, what's with the jeans, denim on denim, podcast, redban, brian redban, yoshi, obayashi, strong performer, jerry seinfeld, comedians

Id: tpe4C4SCgMc

Length: 215min 52sec (12952 seconds)

Published: Thu Jan 31 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/Natura70]

Redband looks like the leprechaun from those shity 90's movies grew up lol