Tilda Swinton’s unique and androgenous looks
have given her the label of “Hollywood’s Most Intoxicating Weirdo”. The actress who admitted
that she tried to kill her baby brother, has a knack for playing the most villainous roles
amongst other interesting characters in film, from the devious White Witch in Narnia, to the
all knowledgeable Ancient One in Dr. Strange.
But what you might not know is that it’s not
just her looks that are unconventional, but her relationships too. The actress was rumoured to
have an open relationship with the father of her children, and her boyfriend. While that might
not strike you as odd, they all seem to live very happily under the SAME ROOF. To add to her
very complicated love life, Swinton shocked fans by coming out as “queer” at almost 60-years-old.
Buckle your seats Juicers, cause what we’re about to tell you today, will have you thinking about
relationships in a completely different way.
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The actress met artist and playwright John Byrne back in the eighties, and the two fell in love. It
wasn't long after that their relationship brought a set of twins into the world. Although the
actress kept much of their personal life private, their long-lasting relationship left many
wondering whether they had secretly married and were now building a family together.
But when the two broke up, it was clear that they had never tied the knot and just
happened to have what many considered a strange relationship. Tilda was spotted with
another man who was nineteen years younger than she is. Soon it was confirmed that Swinton
was dating German-born artist Sandro Kopp.
The news left fans shocked as it seemed as though
the actress was having an affair with Kopp.
Tilda was away from her family filming The
Chronicles of Narnia when she and Sandro began seeing each other. The pair
may have found love but it came at the cost of someone else’s heartbreak. Sandro’s
then-girlfriend of four years, Emma Williamson, revealed that the artist brutally broke
up with her via email from the Narnia set, after being mesmerised from meeting Tilda.
"It was awful. I was on my knees on the banks of the Nile, sobbing, with my sister holding
me. At least he could have ended it with me, even on the phone, before he cheated with her."
Sandro’s ex said, adding that he begged her not to tell anyone as he desperately wanted to protect
Tilda’s children and career from such a scandal.
So what about Tilda’s long life partner,
John? How did he cope with the news?
It turns out he took it pretty well. Just
moments into dating, it was revealed that Tilda's new boyfriend had moved into the
family home that she shared with John, father of her children. This isn’t something you
hear everyday, and Tilda’s reaction to the whole situation left even more jaws hanging.
"We are all a family," she has said. "What you must also know is that
we are all very happy."
As awkward as it may have been, it was necessary
for them to share the same home. She and John were co-parenting, and had their children to
think of. This arrangement also came in handy when the actress traveled with Kopp for her
career as John would stay home with the kids.
One can only imagine how the children felt in
that type of situation. Did they have to call Sandro dad too? Whatever the kid’s thoughts, their
mother did what she thought was best for them.
Since having to make such changes and adjustments
for her kids, the actress discovered that there is a lot that she has to sacrifice for her
children. And time is one of those things, even if it meant living out the most
uncomfortable double date scenario.
Swinton grew up in boarding schools and recalled
it being one of the worst experiences of her life, and it's for that reason that she is not a Harry
Potter fan. The boarding school experience and harsh bullying, which the actress says movies
like that romanticize, left her scarred for years. The torment and loneliness that formed
from being away from her family broke something inside her which caused her not to speak
for almost five years when she was younger.
So if she has to withstand smooching her boyfriend
in front of her ex lover just so her children have both their parents around, then so be it.
It’s pretty clear that three is not a crowd in this family… Fans can’t help but
wonder, where do they draw the line?
Just as Tilda had Sandro, John
later found love with a lighting director who also joined the family.
"We have not hidden away and Jeanine is very much part of my life. Tilda knows all about
it and is more than happy with the situation." John shared about his new relationship.
It seems the only people who were rattled by Swinton's living situation at the time was
the public. However, those close to the pair had been filled in on the arrangement. John
shared that his new lover had not only met his own family but Swinton and her lover too.
"I wouldn't say we all socialized together but she has met Sandro and we have all been under one roof
together", he revealed. "I know some people will struggle to understand it, but it works for us."
So, does that mean she would sleep over too?
John has since moved out of their cohabiting
household, so we’ll never know, but he is still a frequent visitor. Swinton shared that she never
thought it was taboo for him to be around and still stands by it. When reporters tried to press
the actress about her relationship, concluding that her previous living arrangement was an open
marriage, she quickly debunked the rumours.
"I don't have a husband, I've never been married,"
She told reporters. "I have children with someone else, with whom I'm bringing up my children,
and I've lived with someone else, my sweetheart for the last three years, and maybe it's
extraordinary that we're really all friends."
She added that life does not have to be
complicated, and people tend to complicate things that could be so simple—urging people
to be compassionate and to not be hard on themselves when things do get complicated.
So it was no wonder when the actress came out as queer now at sixty years old without the worry
of it complicating her life or relationship.
The actress revealed in an interview with
British Vogue that though she may be well on her way to her senior years, this
was not a new discovery for Swinton.
"I'm very clear that queer is actually, for
me anyway, to do with sensibility. I always felt I was queer – I was just looking
for my queer circus, and I found it. And having found it, it's my world."
And it seems like the whole world knew it too. After Swinton's coming out news made
headlines, many took to Twitter to express their reaction - with most saying that the news
was "unsurprising". Her androgynous looks and non-conforming lifestyle led many to believe that
the actress was just private about her identity.
Nonetheless, fans were still over the moon for
the actress. One user joked that it's "Incredibly problematic of Tilda Swinton to come out as
queer without also personally proposing to me".
The actress shared that since coming
out, she has found other creatives, the likes of Wes Anderson and Bong Joon- Ho,
that have formed as part of her family.
Swinton was never one to be put into a box. Her
life is a testament to her peculiar nature. An article even considered the actress "Hollywood's
Most Intoxicating Weirdo" because she lives her life boldly and is unapologetic about it. In
fact, the only box the actress has ever been in was one that she voluntarily put herself in.
Back in the nineties, Tilda who also expressed herself as a model and performance artist
hosted an exhibition where she slept in a glass box in a London museum the entire night.
The performance piece was just made up of her sleeping on a white mattress, which the audience
glared at through the through glass walls.
Yes, Swinton is that alternatively cool
kid who turned publicly dozing off into an art. Who wouldn’t pay to see that?
From taking a nap in front of strangers to confessing that she contemplated murdering her own
brother, Tilda is not one to go with the crowd.
One of the strangest things Swinton ever admitted
in an interview was a memory she recalled of wanting to end her baby brother's life. At just
four years old, the actress was frustrated with the sibling rivalry that forms when there
is a newborn. But instead of the malicious intent the actress had, after a turn of events,
she was praised for being her brother's hero.
"I remembered when I was four or five, I tried to
kill my own brother," she said in the interview. "I went into his room to kill him, saw some
ribbons from a bonnet going into his mouth, and began to pull them out. And I was
discovered saving his life. So I had this strange reputation - my brother's savior
- and no one knew I wanted to kill him."
Now we understand how she lands those
villainous roles. It was in her all along.
Tilda Swinton does not live her life through a
textbook. The actress creates her own reality, which she is very much content and happy in. She
may be scrutinized for her lifestyle and choices, but it's better to embrace who you
are than pretend to be someone else for the sake of what others will think.
If anything, Swinton's peculiar nature is encouragement for everyone out
there to just be themselves.
