Wade O'Neill & Christina Boudreau / Suicide Awareness

the ryan reese show from southern california this is the ryan reese show post your questions using ryan reese on his instagram twitter or facebook are you ready all right ready going down it is uh it's suicide prevention month and i figured it would be smart to bring in some of my friends that have not only uh been down that road but also um have a lot of experience in and meeting with people and counseling with people that are dealing with suicide and depression and stuff like that so i have christina beaudreau did i say it right say and everyone that listens to the show and every time i have her on i think the conversation goes exactly like pretty much yeah well you know christina she's one of the ambassadors of the whosoever she's been on the show several times um you've seen her uh on the show and she has a powerful story so it's always good to have her on and have her insight as she travels around and speaks in front of thousands of high school students she works very closely with a lot of young girls and and and women in their uh their you know their quest and journey through their their faith walk so it's good to have her perspective then i got wade uh wade o'neal from calvary chapel diamondbar he's been on the show several times as well you guys you guys will know him once he starts talking but um his story is he's uh went through this road of suicide and depression and god pulled him through and he's here at the church and wade you counsel with so many people you do funerals for exactly this subject so both of you guys welcome to the show why don't you just let the listeners uh know just kind of laid out from what kind of stories you've been hearing from funerals you've been doing from families you've been meeting with what is the pulse what is going on right now in 2020 with suicide well there it seems like there's always been this theme over the past these 10 years it seems as depression and suicide amongst young people has really been rampant and over the course of these last few months though we hear a lot of younger people have this feeling because of quarantine because of the the really lack of of hope in this in this world right now um feeling pressed in and trapped and so we're getting a lot of calls of younger people struggling with depression the first funeral i did during this covid uh pandemic was for a young girl who committed suicide and so we're seeing not only now we're also seeing not only young people who are battling with severe depression or who were battling with severe depression and now they're really deep in it but also older people who have never battled depression that are raising young children they don't see a hope for their children in this world perhaps because of the economic problems they're facing they've lost their job they've lost careers we're facing different challenges today than ever than we ever have before and so i think a lot of people from whether you're younger or older or this broad range of ages are experiencing some maybe some for the first time despondency despair depression and then those younger people who are have had so much taken away from them right now by means of just a normal life are dealing with battles that they've never have gone through right now so we got a great task i have a question for you so that girl how young was she uh she was 18. so she just became an adult she's considered young um we know that the cdc came out with a an interview on fox news and probably some other channels as well saying that um suicide and drug overdose is higher than ever with with teens but as you were saying this is uh this isn't affecting everyone because the the job loss of jobs people are also because the pandemic people are at home with their families and if you don't get along with your spouse uh or you know if you're not a christian you're living with your girlfriend or boyfriend um now you're you're stuck at home in the in this situation and you're stuck with all your kids and maybe you don't even like your kids and this could cause literally two fights and depression and drug overdose and drinking and all these things and um it's and then you have also with the media you know what like i'm just i guess what i'm trying to do is unpeel the onion like why suicide you have the media pushing all this fear you know you're scared of of to go out your doors and there's all these different things that can attribute to to depression and then just say man i can't live like this i don't want to live like this the world's coming to an end i mean there's fires out there right now you know when i walked in i'm like all we need is the alien ship to show up and you know over the over la and and then it would be like okay this is it you know and i'd say that lightly but you know there is a lot of things happening right now in 2020 like i was literally just driving here because i'm staying at my parents right now and i'm driving down the hill um my phone doesn't even get reception right now for some reason the wi-fi went out at my dad's house like because the fires and everything that's going on like i'm literally going like like i i'm a christian i have peace i i know what's going on i read the bible i'm not worried about what's going on but i'm literally going mad if i was not a christian right now just looking outside watching the news everything that's going on with the riots with racism um um um we're in the middle of about to have a civil war um uh the uh politics i mean politics all these things it's so bizarre like even when you're watching the news right now you're watching the two sides of what's going on and one side you're going how could you even believe this stuff like these people aren't even answering questions they're pushing riots like when you really look at how crazy it is right now and then you don't have hope in jesus christ this could literally cause you to go like why we why we're stuck at our houses why are we even here what is going on there's nothing good that seems that could even happen right now yeah for sure i think you hit the nail on the head it's that the feeling of again hopelessness that's what that's really what depression is whether it's truth or a lie when you're in christ there's never a hopeless situation the lord has a purpose for all things and is working in all things and desires to minister to you and use you in the midst of all things but if you don't have christ all the plans of the people that were walking according to this world are and the lord wiped them out completely in a matter of months and so hopefully people are going to turn to the lord and i believe the harvest is right now more than ever before so we'll see what the lord does um james james talks about going through tr having joy in trials with the book yeah you know there's it's a lot of hard times it talks about just going through really uh hard times in in your life but there is there is joy when you're when you're walking with god and i would encourage people to read that that book of james it's really short it's like five or six chapters but um you know god doesn't promise us um you know this this great life as in like everything's gonna work out there's mountaintop experiences there's joy but then there's also hard difficult trials and i would look at 2020 as a big trial right and and you could either press in or like my wife would say hunker down and and press into the storm and and look for because god's in the storms he's everywhere or you could just lose it and just give up and become hopeless and find yourself in a situation where you feel like it's never going to get better storms come and they go right they come and go but but your your faith will endure during this can endure during this time and there is hope in jesus christ and you can get through and this storm will pass is it hard yes it's very hard but don't don't lose hope christina what would you have to say about everything that's that you know we've been talking about and just from your perspective of what's going on yeah you know as i was just kind of praying about just what you know just where like kind of what wade said you know it's like right now i read a statistic that said like one in four young adults are dealing have contemplated suicide this is a cdc statistic have contemplated suicide because of the pandemic and i think when you when we think about suicide no one wakes up one day and i'm sure wade you know this too and thinks to themselves i'm depressed and i want to commit suicide today and a lot of what i feel like to just like talk about today is what it what it's like to be in a situation where there's extreme loss despair and hopelessness and choose that path versus being in a situation where you're experiencing those same things but choosing like victory um just want to share briefly like take your time yeah yeah an hour yeah for sure so um a couple years ago in 2018 i was experiencing just a lot of um a lot of loss kind of a lot of people are experiencing now a lot of loss um my home for a couple years was very toxic there was a lot of violence the cops were in and out a lot of drug addiction which craft a lot of stuff was happening and i was going from that to doing ministry with in pretty crazy situations you know like ministering to people who are going through hard things and so naturally like i like i had a lot of those emotions of like sadness and hopelessness you know and a lot of those things because of my circumstances and started dealing with like panic attacks and anxiety at the beginning of 2018 and had experienced more loss towards the middle 2018 i had lost a church family and i got without giving a lot of details i got adopted by another church family out of the state of california and when i originally went there i went there to get away i went there to heal i went there to kind of have a safe place because my home wasn't a safe place and what i experienced there was more abuse and more trauma and so and i think who i was inside like my house literally my my life felt like like i don't know my soul just felt really empty you know my spirit just felt really tired like emotionally i was so tapped out and my i started developing depression towards the end of 2018 and basically to um i flew back down to california to do a ted talk and then when i flew back up to where i was staying at the time i pretty much i was working 13 hour days for like six days straight and i pretty much had a nervous breakdown where i lost my mind for about a week dealt with severe panic attacks a lot of depression extreme suicidal thoughts and in that moment i was where a lot of people are today experiencing a lot of loss a lot of hopelessness a lot of despair a lot of really feeling like abandoned or really not knowing what my life was going to look like because i was like if this is all my life is going from one abusive trauma situation to next like i don't know if i want to live this life anymore and at that point like i was a christian i was in ministry i was experiencing i had experienced the faithfulness of the lord but in that moment all i wanted was for the pain to end i wasn't thinking about my family i wasn't thinking about my friends i wasn't thinking about what my actions like the repercussions of my actions i just remember literally thinking to myself my life feels like a house that's empty with no furniture it feels so empty and i just want the emptiness to go away and so i went to the corner store got some pills and i was gonna overdose just out of state out you know whatever and in that moment of really feeling like completely out of myself like my mind was racing so fast and all i remember was the peace of the lord come upon me and the lord just speaking in my heart like christine i love you and i felt a peace i hadn't experienced in a long time and the lord that day encountered me and it wasn't like this moment where like the angel showed up to mary and was like you're gonna have the son of god you know it was just a moment where i felt so don't look for that big bone yeah yeah it was just their simple reminder from the good shepherd that he loved me and he saw my pain he sought my loss and he saw my circumstance and from that point i actually spent three months in florida last year at calvary chapel bible fellowship at jairus's church you know he's one of our ambassadors i spent three months just healing taking bible classes i was like i would vacuum the church after church on sundays like i just would like lay in the church sanctuary in the middle of the day and just have my devils with the lord because i needed a season with my shepherd where i needed him to restore my soul and that's really what the lord did and when i came home last year from florida i came home to a family member who had just gotten out of jail who my parents were trying to rehab at the time but this family member was also the family member that raped me growing up and was fully involved in witchcraft so i came home to an environment once again where there was witchcraft having to look into the face of my abuser every day and um and honestly feeling like a season where i literally remember coming home and being like is this some kind of sick joke you know yeah but but i'm listening to this story and i've heard it before and i'm thinking like like i'm thinking like what if i was in that situation right that's so gnarly yeah yeah it was so gnarly yeah yeah like i wouldn't wish that i don't know yeah i wouldn't wish that circumstance upon my worst enemy and i don't have very many enemies and long story short three months later the same global organization ministry that was located outside of california that had adopted me shut down because of the abuse that myself and over 150 young people had experienced and so in a day i lost the only place that i thought was safe i lost all of my stuff that i had moved up there like 29 years worth of stuff like i had just gotten back from india and i had like a suitcase of like tunics and like some jeans and t-shirts with me i lost all my stuff i lost my monthly income which was basically i was on their missionary support i lost two people in my life that i believed were good at the time who were like parents to me i lost those people i lost a community i lost so much in one day and i remember and it was all because of this like global abuse scandal and it was like such a gnarly situation and so i remember like getting a phone call that day after like everything happened and literally looking at my life ryan like i literally remember being at home i had just gotten back from india and literally being like my story of abuse is now all over these news outlets my i'm looking at my home situation at the person that abused me growing up i'm looking at my house and having to be having to battle like gnarly spiritual warfare every day because of the witchcraft that was happening in my house and literally like i could have chosen one of two paths i could have chosen the path of like my life is done like i experienced a level of hopelessness and sadness and despair and abandonment and betrayal that day that i had never experienced in my life but it was a choice that day to choose the path of depression and defeat and hopelessness or to choose the path that would ultimately lead to victory and that day i remember looking back at my time that i had with the lord in florida of how faithful he was to me i looked back at all of the times in the word that i had when i was in florida of literally reading the story of shadrach meshach and abednego and how when they're in the fire the lord reminded them like you are unbound in the fire so stop acting like you're bound and and really taking that word to heart and the lord reminding me that like just like how job experienced so much lost in one day like he literally lost everything in one day and that was the same thing with me i lost everything in one day and it wasn't because he did anything wrong but because he did everything right and satan asked the lord to sift him and you know whatever and job's response to loss was worship and i remember that day going in my room and going on my knees and just worshiping the lord and i was like dude this is nuts i feel like my life was a doll house that just got turned upside down but i was like i'm gonna i'm gonna work through this and i'm not going to end up where i was so i remember calling my best friend to go to florida for two weeks i remember calling ryan i remember calling um a couple other people in my life and really saying like dude like i need you guys to hold my feet to the fire because this is really nuts but i'm not going to allow this this loss and despair and hopelessness to take me out and practically it was a long year of healing like this family remember by the grace of god no longer lives with my family they're back on the street but like i literally had to not allow myself to be a victim of my circumstance to not allow myself no a lot not to allow my circumstances to become my identity like how a lot of people are looking at their life right now like a lot of people are like i've lost my job i can't provide for my family i've lost my mental health like i can't go to school like everything that has ever defined everyone has been completely stripped away now they're the victim yeah and now the victim that's interesting that you say that first of all as you're talking about i'm just thinking job job all day it's just gone yeah but then also the the verse that i thought of was um in uh matthew when it talks about you know the road yeah the road to heaven is narrow and few find it yeah the highway to hell is broad and many changes that way well the road the difficult road to heaven says it's difficult it's narrow and it's it's a difficult road because why is it difficult because amongst all the circumstance and all the stuff that's going on the easy way was just be like i'm just going to off myself and do drugs or yeah yeah or i'm going to just kill myself and that's just the easy thing to do yeah but the hard part the narrow road is difficult i mean and few find it because it's all about faith and endurance through these times yeah and god doesn't uh god doesn't he's not giving you all this stuff it's just we live in a fallen world and things happen and things fall apart i've heard stories of a you know a guy that you know he lost his job started losing his wealth obviously when you lose your job in your wealth and you're trying to provide for your family all those things that you're talking about you know mortgage and gas and car payment and food and you know all the basic things that you need to just operate plus your family that all connects to all that stuff and i remember him just saying you know what i'm just i was just gonna i'm just gonna commit suicide and he's like i'm just gonna end it all because of the circumstances but god intervened and god took him on a long road a journey of healing a process it wasn't like immediately but he had to like put the time in that difficult narrow road to the kingdom he had to bear his cross and god took him from one really desperate empty place in his life and literally rebuild his life and restored his life david arroyo yeah yeah we know yeah and then from that point now is god has blessed his life his kids are like a scholarship to stanford and to uh uh for wrestling and one's got uh a full ride to rave zechariah's school and he graduated top of his class at chapman and got some crazy award that they ever got in 40 years and he's going to be a doctor but but think about him in this time and this relates to you in that time where you're at he was in this desperate place yeah empty and if he would have done that he would have never seen what god was about to do yeah on the flip side of his life because that would that suicide all that would have completely destroyed the family yeah operation who knows how the kids would have been affected and the wife and everyone yeah but even with you and i'm like wade wade's going to chime into this as well but now going back to you where you were at and now what god has done since that time and how long ago was that yeah that was like yeah it was a year ago a year ago you know she's talking about that yeah yeah it was that yeah and all that back in the day yeah but but um now but what god has done has been this journey he's healing you know he's watching this and he's still working out his stuff yeah yeah and there's and i think that's what a lot of people like i just want to validate for a lot of people is that when hard stuff happens like like healing is hard work like when i had to go to physical therapy for my foot like when i had a torn ligament like dude it was hard work to strengthen that muscle again and physical therapy yeah and i had and honestly i think that's the biggest thing that i want to share today is that a lot of you guys are probably where i was last year where all you think about with life right now is that is that in life in this world right now there's darkness there's hopelessness and despair but what i've experienced with the lord as the good shepherd when you read the shepherds look at psalm 23 and when it says like he will lead us through the valley of the shadow of you know he lead us through the valley shout out death will for no evil and it says you know he leads us like sorry that's a different verse you believe yeah yeah yeah and but when a shepherd talks about when a shepherd leads the sheep through the valley it's to the purpose of leading them to the mountaintop and that's what a shepherds look at psalm 23 is and that's what god did in my life was really taking me through the valley not to leave me there not to leave me in a broken place but to lead me to the mountaintop where there's greener pastures and what god has done over this last year in my life is that he has literally done what he did in the life of job like he has restored he has given me double of what i had before and it might not be in like physical things but it has been he's restored my soul double fold like emotionally spiritually mentally physically he has walked i literally backtracked with the lord of this last year of how he took me to like i'm really good with like pastor rob mccoy calvary thousand oaks and the linguists there they hosted me for two weeks and just counseled me for two weeks with everything that happened last year i went to india twice like god took me to mexico i went to malaysia to visit my family for a month like god has literally brought so many amazing people in my life i have seen so much beauty in the body of christ he's restored my trust in people like i bel there is so much beauty and life and hope in this world and i think at the time i didn't see that obviously but i chose to cling on to what i believed was good about god and i think a lot of people you think that there is no good left in this world you think there's no light you think there's no hope but what i've experienced over this last year despite my circumstances when i literally remember looking at god and there was a day that i literally said god why would a loving god allow this to happen to me that i was like i got that honest with the lord and the lord literally just took my hand took me through that season and i look back now and i thank the lord for that season like i thank the lord for that because i have that's a part of my testimony that god is now using and i and if i could do it again i would so with all that said you're listening right now and you might be in this situation i think everything that she said would add up to a situation where you could be suicidal yeah and i think there's a lot of different elements in your life that can relate to so many different people that are listening to the show right now and this is the this is the uh the story this is the good news of christ of what he does it's not going to be easy it's going to be a journey the road's difficult but god is faithful with his grace and he will see you through and he will heal you and he will carry you through these these cr the most crazy these some of these most difficult times in your life you'll look back and you're like how in the heck did i make it through and literally it's just god's grace i'm gonna let uh wade chime in now um so what would you how would you like to add uh to that and and um just kind of think of that a lot of what she shared right now is is so important and just praying through this show come before this i think there's just i know the lord was just leading me in the direction of everything she just said of a choice needs to be made and i would like to say that i've only battled depression once in my life but that's that's not true it's it comes in seasons and it comes and it goes but in those seasons there's always a choice to be made and sometimes it's it's daily sometimes it's moment by moment i'm not going to live in this i've experienced god's grace in the past i know how to walk through this now and the bite of it isn't as gnarly any longer but there are certain disciplines you have to instill into your life and there are things that you have to do the bible talks about not giving satan a foothold talk about that in the um in the world we live in right now especially the there's there's so much at our fingertips and a feeling of wanting to get out of a situation or i can't ever get out of this situation is is often in the minds of people that are battling despair and depression and a lot of times we distract ourselves from the feelings that we're going through social media try to numb yourself medicate yourself but you have to own it if you're a believer you have to take up your cross and you have to go through this and for me i can speak for myself in dealing with these things i know the things in my life the footholds that i can allow into my life that will lead me down that path and i know there's things that i need to be super disciplined in um that if i when you're when you're going through a difficult season there's a sense of everything's out of your control and so for the key the awards can't and never i'll never get out of this situation it's always going to be like this i'm always going to feel like this it's not true but as christina was saying you're you're in the fire but you're not bound in the fire um i've developed this mindset of like wanting to master the things that are in my control in the midst of a difficult situation so it's not so much of getting out of it but it's it's walking through it gaining what the lord has for me in it um and it's as simple as disciplining discipline in your spiritual life discipline and even taking care of yourself physically um a lot of things in your life that you need to examine your own heart and examine your own mind and ask the lord to go before you in those challenges so whatever you're going through right now in your life i pray throughout this show we can give you some opportunities to really i guess some tangible things to take home and to learn how to walk this walk in because it's you will get through it if you're walking through it with the lord you will get through it this this temptation of satan to tell you that this is never going to change so just end it that's it's not true it's it's deception it's a lie but the peace comes within it when you surrender to it and say okay lord this is the lot that you've given me in my life right now this is what you've allowed into my life right now how do you want me to walk through this and when you begin to walk through it with the lord um that changes everything and when we get back from the break in a couple minutes um i want to talk about you know because you said i wish i could say i'd ever dealt with it once and you're a pastor you're a christian and people say well how can christians deal with that i want to talk about that and i want to expand on the footholes because i got some things to say about the footholds as well we'll be back in two minutes right after the break but i also want to plug that we are touring montana and idaho uh this month so contact us we have a few dates that are open we are coming to florida the month of november for our tour and we are working on booking more dates around the world so please contact us at the whosoever's dot com and we will come and bring the gospel peace more of the ryan reece show coming up post your questions at ryan reese on his instagram twitter and or facebook [Music] now back back to the ryan reese show all right we're back then i got wade and christina in studio weber it's uh suicide um suicide awareness month and at the first top of the show christina was talking about her story about uh the difference between victory and defeat you would say and it's very powerful so if you missed it tuned back in but what before the breaks wait you were you were talking about you said a comment you go you know i dealt with depression um and i wish i could say it was only one time in my life but it was a couple different times you're a pastor at calvary chapel and um you were also talking about these footholes that we allow satan to get a hold of us and you know it causes this depression and anxiety and all this stuff in our life unbelief and all these things and i want to i want to unpack both of those things and dig into them a little bit more so like for start with christian dealing with depression people would say well the bible says whoever the son of god sets free is free indeed so how would you take that verse and compare it to you a christian and you going through hard times and and uh battling bouts of depression uh once in a while how would you i would just say that um no one is going to know how you feel and so that feeling that you have that no one knows that you how you feel it's true and it's not true right the bible says that there's no temptation that's not common to man right the lord i mean we've all gone through through battles in our lives but the truth of your feeling that you feel that no one understands um is is true to a degree because you can't effectively when you're going through this this despair and depression you can't you can't effectively put words to what you're thinking and how you're feeling and when you try to explain it to somebody and that you're trying to make them understand it leads you into more frustration because they don't understand because they're not there and so even though they're trying their best too um and i would even say this i'm married i love my wife i have a great wife a spiritual woman loves the lord with all of her heart but to a large degree apart from her prayers she's of no value in its bouts of depression to me so by god's grace i've learned how to go through it to where she she doesn't know like i'm going through it as gnarly as i am but i just communicate to her look like this is what's going on boom we move forward um but because the lord has been gracious to to teach me how to go through this and it's really been his and i'll say this it's really his his grace it's really instead of it being the enemy's hand it's it's the lord's hand of preparation in my life the lord's hand of molding me and shaping me in my life so when my eyes and my heart get off of what i think needs to happen or my or my eyes get off of myself or get off the enemy and on to the lord and say okay lord what are you seeking to do in my life in this season and there's surrender to it and working through it then there's peace in the midst of it because now i know like okay lord forgive me when i get when i get out everything i need to get out and i get alone with the lord and say lord i know exactly what you're doing and so i think a lot of people who maybe this is your first time going through this or maybe you've lived in this and you're a believer and you really haven't pressed into the lord and the lord is using this to mold you and shape you and sand off the rough edges in your life and to humble you allow it to be done and allow the lord to to do his work and as christina was saying on the first half of this show she made a choice she made a choice you've got to make a choice yep and say i'm not living in this yes this is true this is real i'm feeling and i'm and this is not like this is not like self-help stuff no this is like life or death stuff i'm going to make a choice and i'm not going to live in this i'm going to choose to walk with the lord through it because you might try to say okay i'm not going to do this anymore okay it works for five minutes and then you're back into it you have to own this the season you have to surrender you have to put off getting out of it you have to put off what's going to happen tomorrow you've got to put off what your future is going to look like and just surrender and accept and rest in christ and choose to say okay lord work on me we were talking about the strongholds the footholds we can allow into our life really quick because we're going to go into the footholds but it would be safe to say and i truly believe it is that when you're in these these um um situations where you feel anxiety or panic attacks or depressed or anything like that it's so easy to get stuck in this zone and not to get like to get plugged into the word it's just almost like you just kind of live you just live in these areas like i think a lot of people get stuck and they just they just feed into what the enemy's saying and they don't like literally pick up their bible they literally start praying they just kind of like let the enemy just kind of get that foothold and just run wild with with the thought process yeah depression and getting through it and getting ultimately out of it it's not easy but it's very simple tell us like i think if you listen to the beginning the show with christina everything she she did was simple very simple i made a choice i'm going to set myself aside and i'm going to seek the lord and you're gonna just trust i remember when the lord talks that's it that's my point is like totally just get out of that mindset not mindset that's about it because you're getting oppressed by the enemy but you have to make that decision and you have to literally take yourself out of that little zone you're living in that little bubble and you got to get out of that and and go sit with the lord totally you have to change the whole atmosphere or the whole environment should i say i remember the lord teaching me like what providence really means that god is really in control of my life and when you surrender and trust in the lord and surrender and submit to his providence then like what he's going to do in the future or what he's going to do tomorrow or how he's going to work a situation out becomes irrelevant because it's going to happen and so your only focus that the lord has given you is to seek him seek first the kingdom of god and his righteousness and all these things will be added unto you and you say well it can't be that simple no it's really that simple you are really that weak when you feel mentally weak you you really are that weak but in christ you are strong in the lord the lord leads us up to that point to teach us that simple lesson that we are weak but he is strong and in his strength we can do all things and the only way you're going to know what he says is that if you read the bible and it's like some people and i used to think like this and you know you would say well you're going through all this crazy stuff and it's like if i read the bible i'm reading a book like it ain't going to do nothing to me that reading that book is not going to fix my problems like think about like it is kind of like stupid it's a stupid thought think about it like really foolishness to the world it's foolishness like wait so i'm depressed or i feel anxiety or i'm just going through bad things and i'm going to go read a book and if i read that book all of a sudden my i'm going to feel better it's going gonna fix my problems that book is supernatural you know and when you have the holy spirit in you and you read that book you're connecting it's god's words there's a supernatural event that happens when you open the bible and you read the word of god it just i can't explain it but when you get done you're like i'll send you like i feel peace like there's something that happens supernaturally it's the work of the holy spirit it's the power of god that is operating between the words on that page and you reading in your soul being impacted by it you're being filled up and it's coming alive and it's sharper than a two-edged sword the bible says and it's it's truth everything all of our enemies especially in the midst of uh depression the world the flesh and the unknown and that's all lies and you are your own worst enemy you are a liar your heart deceives you the world is deceiving satan is deceiving and so what you're doing is you're you're coming to that place besides psalm 23 you're coming beside the still waters and you're allowing your soul to be restored and you're focusing on truth and now a lot and we're going to come back to you uh christina anway we'll go back and forth but basically you know all that stuff that that's going on in your mind sometimes especially in that state it's a bunch of lies i saw this post a while ago it says don't believe everything you think don't believe everything you think and how do you get what you're thinking how do you find out what is going on in your mind is it truth because you understand the bi jesus says that the eye is the light to the body we're looking at screen time we all we're all guilty of looking at screen time and do you know how much fake or untruthful stuff we're putting in to our eyes that it's going into our soul so there's a lot of thought process stuff going on in your mind and the only way you can compare it to find out what is true is you bounce it off the word of god and that's a supernatural event when you open the scriptures and you start reading it and the truth jesus says i am the way the truth and the life there's no way to the father god but through him and the bible is his word he became flesh so when you're reading that he's giving through the work of the holy spirit he's giving truth the holy spirit that is in you is confirming the truth and it's bound and it could show you what are lies and what is truth and that's how we live our life because if you're in this place and you're depressed and you're suicidal and you feel like you just can't do it anymore and you just can't live with your you pretty much can't live with your mind at that point right i mean that's why people do drugs i mean i was a drug i used to like to do drugs and drinking why because there was so i was never suicidal um i would get very depressed from the amount of substance i would do in the life i was living but i always knew that there was a hell and i was like i'm not going to do that i'm not going to go out that way but the the the truth is that god when you read the bible he would he'll bring truth to your life and what i was saying is i got lost in my my thought process there but basically what happened is um i would use drugs and alcohol to numb the pain and basically should i say just to turn my mind off yeah because i do honestly i couldn't live and i know this has to go with suicidal stuff okay cause i was never suicidal but the the my thought process of what i hear in my mind and everything that i've done in the situations i put myself in and things that i've done i literally i couldn't live with with that thought with those thoughts so the way i dealt with it not suicide but i would deal with it through turning off my mind through drugs and alcohol yeah and just being in a dazed dazed and confused mindset and that's how i dealt with a lot of my stuff yeah but then if you don't do that or if you do or not and it's real your mind's really hunting you have everything that's going on you're like i want this off forever yeah that's where suicide comes in yeah but there's a way out yeah through jesus christ you got anything anything else you want to say about uh anything you want to read over there yeah so um one of the things that i think a lot of people when they're going through depression especially in this time like every time you turn the news every time you turn on social media it's like negative negative negative and one of the things that i did last year that was a very practical thing was that i remember telling my parents like because there was a lot of people that wanted to talk to me about what happened because people just wanted to know like the circumstances of what i walked out of and i was like dude i'm not going to sit there like a tape recorder and tell these people because there's no point you know and but i said every conversation i have every step that i take is going to be a conversation moving forward and i made that that resolve in my life that every person i was going to talk to it was going to be a healthy person every conversation i was going to have i wanted it to be a healing conversation every place i went to church you know i started going to the young adult study at at our church you know with wade like um and i was like i want it to be a healthy place and and when you look at the life of job when in the midst of everything that was happening like he had friends that were like that negative tape recorder that were just like you should just curse god and die like you know his wife was just like doom and gloom and there came a point right before god restored job that the lord told job that he needed to go and basically hold his friends accountable for misrepresenting god in his life you know he had to offer a sacrifice or whatever and and in my life one of the things that got me through was actually in philippians 4 um verse 8 it says finally brothers whatever is true whatever is honorable whatever is just whatever is pure whatever is lovely whatever is commendable if there is any excellence if there's anything worthy of praise think about these things and and one thing that i did was that i literally resolved in my life that i was going to cut out any negative person any negative thing social media i literally went on my instagram and i unfollowed like literally 500 people i'm following why did you follow me know that one day accidentally yeah no um she did no i did no i didn't no but there was just a lot of like negative people and yeah they will drag you down they'll drag you down and so i literally was like god i'm just gonna focus i literally was like worship music positive people people that were literally going to pull me like imagine like people like climbing a staircase since every person helping you take a step up like i cut out all the negative and i was like everything needs to be a moving forward motion and to this day some people still want to like hear the tape recorder version and i'm like no dude because that's a step back i don't need to talk about the details of what happened like everything i need to do is moving forward every book every sermon every bible study every friend every time of prayer and there was obviously a time where i met with my counselor where i talked about the details and there was times that i met with my mentors and i talked about the details and i still do that but it's all to move forward and not dwell on the past and i think to everyone like when you read philippians 4 8 it's like why does paul say like focus on things that are true and just and admirable because the things you focus on like you will become what you behold if all i would have if all i would have focused on was the negatives about my life circumstance because if i were to look at the facts of my life i could have been a victim if i looked at the facts of my life i could have lived in that shame but i chose that i was not going to live in that place and i chose to focus on the goodness of god like i literally woke up every day and i said you know what lord and to this day i do this i say thank you for what you've done in my life thank you for what i have thank you for my family thank you for the whosoevers you know thank you that i have amazing and amazing church family and friends and the more i think to god the more i god restored my mind that a year later i have more joy more peace more wholeness than i've ever had because i resolved to do what philippians 4 8 says and focus on good things no i'm going to let you read right now uh wade uh so you know it's interesting as i had because you were just talking about how god healed your mind yeah you know and i had mike mcintosh on here i don't know a couple weeks ago or something like that i don't know i'm old time flies it could have been a couple months ago and mike on there and a lot of people like that show but he was talking about how uh you know he thought he blew his brains out he thought he was walking around with half of his face blown off he went crazy from lsd and a gunshot that with all these like demon work the devil worshipers whatever happened to him um basically he was fried to the max and he was in church he was speaking i think lonnie frisbie basically looked over to him and said god's healing you right now or something like that and bam he said like saw like lightning shoot through his mind and like a flash and boom he was healed and that's what god does my point is god can heal the man that thinks he's looking at the mirror and his face is halfway gone blown off from our shotgun or someone that's dealing with depression he could heal anyone and do anything he wants but it all goes down to what was mike mcintosh at the time he was going to church even though he thought his brain was blown out going to church going to church reading the bible going to church going to church and hearing the study and then by god's sovereign grace he just touched them and healed him one day and in the same way what'd you do you got alone with god and you just kept doing it over and over and over and god healed you in that process yeah we're as believers we're called to a life of victory and it's typified in the book of joshua in you know the children of israel going into the promised land really stepping out a generation stepping out of unbelief into belief into a life of faith and in the promised land there is a bunch of giants in battles battle after battle and that's the entire book of joshua is all battles but the lord promised before they went into the promised land everywhere the soul of your foot touches joshua i've given it all to you and the sad thing is that the children of israel didn't take all of the land but all he had to say all the law all they all he had it started with one step believing the promise and then putting your foot into the jordan the jordan didn't part until joshua put his foot in the jordan that sounds crazy right you got to think about this yeah yeah it's like reading the bible and you're going to feel better take it the lord speaks to me he's like yeah you you want to say like oh that's not going to do anything that's not going to fix anything oh really put your foot in the jordan what and like step by step this battle just make a choice open your bible read it cut out people of your life stop delete instagram for until this battle's over at least it's worth your life it's worth your your mind because the mind is the arena of all spiritual warfare and heck yeah the bible says he will keep you in perfect peace if your mind is stayed on him not like you can't distract yourself and that's that's what the enemy wants to do he wants you to distract yourself little alertments here and there maybe if i do this i can get out of this and then it's it's never true you're in the season of depression i'll tell you emphatically you won't be in it forever but you have to walk with the lord through it it's not easy it's a battle there's gonna be good days there's going to be bad days there's going to be good moments there's going to be really really gnarly moments yeah but you have to retreat to the simple things worship the word of god in prayer and just believing that because god said it he will do it just choose to believe so going off what you just said when we're worshiping we have to turn off our phone we have to disconnect worship is not to be distracted and to be texting on your phone trying to read the bible remember we were talking about open the bible and read there's something supernatural that happens there as your body uh as your spirit gets fed by the by the living word um if you're all distracted you're not you're not you're not worshiping god i mean imagine if i'm talking to you and i'm over here and i'm like yeah wait so you know we're talking and i'm texting and i'm like put my skateboard together and you know like that's the way like okay you're talking to god you're hearing him talk to you when you read the bible it's like him talking to you and you're like texting and you're doing other things you're not the true way to worship god is to bow your will and to submit to him and listen and if we're completely distracted by instagram and all this stuff you're putting in all this garbage you're allowing satan to get these footholds in your life through all this stuff and this is why there's no victory yeah i have a daughter that's a zero victory yeah one of my daughters is very like in her mind a lot thinker and there's times where i'll just let her i'll watch her i'll just let her spin her wills for a little bit until she's just like so frustrated and then she'll come to me and she'll say daddy how do i do this and then it's like boom done i like that so we get to this point of like the lord just like you want to spin your wheels bro i'm gonna let you be broken i'm gonna let you be frustrated i'm gonna let you run yourself into the ground and i'm watching you but i need you to come to me broken and ready to let me show you how to do this or let me do this for you and so i just want to live a life of surrender okay lord i don't want to have to be like worn out or broken i want to stay broken so you can just do what you got to do and stay dependent uh break down that verse come to me are you our weary and heavy lady and for all of you peace and rest for your soul that's an amazing verse because jesus he there there's always an invitation to come he says come to me all you who are weary and heavy laden he says and learn from me he says all you everybody that's everybody no matter what you're going through he says and and learn and learn of me let me teach you and there you will find rest for yourself for my yoke is easy and my burden is light so we place these like heavy burdens of like your life was never yours to direct so don't try just obey today rest in him trust in him and there's a quiet surrender when you when you obey god you know people may say man oh submit to god that sucks no honestly it's like when you obey god and you just submit to him and like god i want you to do what you want to do in my life because you know the best because he's a loving father that sounds so christianized and so cliche but honestly it's true and and you know me i don't talk christianise but he wants to bless you as well and and when you do submit to him it's literally like to you you get so your life is literally it's full and you're like you're having fun and you feel peace and yeah you go through trials and tribulations and storms and all that stuff yes yes but honestly you start doing stuff that you had no idea that god wanted you to do and you're so happy doing it it's like what you think you like oh i love this piece of paper but god's like oh you're gonna love this laptop you're gonna love this iphone and you're gonna love this computer and you're gonna love this camera and i'm not saying these items i'm just saying these things he puts into your life and you're like dude my gosh i had no idea i used to think i used to just love writing you know writing on paper you know uh letters or whatever he's like well wait till you get the laptop you're gonna be able to like write and you're gonna be able to design you're gonna be able to video edit you'll be able to you know do photos and all this stuff like he's like i have so much more for you like you're stoked on this piece of paper in this pin wait till you see the g5 laptop you know what i mean and that's honestly like a rad illustration of just what god he has so much more from you don't settle for what you think you like he has so much more yeah so i would end it here listen wherever you're at in your life or wherever you're at right now you're driving you're watching this on youtube or one of our other platforms or on our app or on our you know website god loves you ask him in your life all you have to do is literally he he says come to me all you that's everyone every race wherever you're at in the world come to me now and just ask for forgiveness just say jesus forgive me of my sins i'm a dirty sinner and i've i haven't given my life to you i haven't surrendered i haven't bowed my will i my my eye has opened up to all this darkness i'm just feeding myself all this garbage and i'm tired of feeling the way i want flood me with the holy spirit fill me with the holy spirit baptize me with the holy spirit with the blood that was shot on the cross forgive me of all my sins wash me white as snow and lord use my life and show me who i am in you my identity in you and teach me how to walk with you just say that prayer and he'll do it right now and i said pray in jesus name holy spirit fall on them fill them baptize them jesus forgive them and show them and prove that you're real right now through this screen or through this audio encounter encounter them in a powerful way in jesus name well you guys that's the end of the show thank you christina thank you uh beau drew boudreau boudreaux i'm over it all right well hey go to the hoosterwebbers.com invite us uh to your city we're doing school events park events juvenile detentions anywhere there's youth we're there peace [Music] this has been the ryan reese show to connect and find out more about ryan click on ryan reese.com check us out next saturday at 9 pm for the ryan reece show [Music]

Channel: Ryan Ries

Views: 359

Rating: 5 out of 5

Keywords: The Whosoevers, Ryan Ries, Irvine, California, Answering, Listeners, Questions, On, The Ryan Ries Show, Christina Boudreau, Wade O'Neill, Suicide Awareness, Suicide, Healing, Power, of, Jesus Christ, Holy Spirit, New Creation, Defeating Suicide

Id: paYPk1VfoTY

Length: 58min 3sec (3483 seconds)

Published: Sat Sep 11 2021