Uptown Girls is an Underrated Masterpiece on Healing Your Inner Child

foreign hello and welcome or welcome back um today I'm going to be talking about one of the best films of the early 2000s Uptown Girls I'm gonna say it Uptown Girls is better than the Godfather and the only reason it was rated so low on Rotten Tomatoes is because the men who reviewed it didn't understand it so growing up this film was one of the only films I had on DVD so I'm not going to lie there is some obvious Nostalgia bias in my assessment of this film however there are many films I did enjoy in my childhood that have a huge Nostalgia value but when I re-watched them as an adult they just don't hold up and are honestly a little boring to watch but this summer I put this film on with the full intention of only watching a little bit of it to kill some time and I found myself completely unable to turn it off because I was just so sucked into the story and I was enjoying it so much for those who are unfamiliar with the film Uptown Girls is a 2003 American Comedy drama film directed by Boaz yukin and written by Julia doll and Moe agrodnick and Lisa davowitz this film is adapted from a story by Allison Jacobs Molly Gunn the freewheeling daughter of a deceased rock legend is forced to get a job when her manager steals her money me as a nanny for precocious Rey the oft ignored daughter of a music executive she learns what it means to be an adult while teaching Rey to be a child I genuinely believe that there is a phenomenon within film where where dramedy films centering female leads are not assessed fairly nor are they taken seriously especially films that star women and don't Center the Romantic relationships as the main or Central plot point I can't help but feel like the majority of male movie critics merely didn't understand this film enough to find it entertaining a few critics cited the characters as unlikable yet I don't believe this to be true the characters are flawed and that is intentional I found these characters not only likable but also deeply relatable as they navigate their feelings of grief and abandonment so today I wanted to delve into this film and its main themes and what I love about it so let's get started my tails are true most of their stories we make up to help us deal with real life it all depends on your point of view but here are the facts there was once a princess who lived in a castle high above the streets of an enchanted kingdom the king and queen were long gone but they left her with their treasure so that she could stay a princess forever on the eve of her 22nd birthday a great celebration was planned Molly's machine Huey and I are just sitting here waiting you better be on your way Molly money down she's still asleep Molly wake up so the film begins with Molly asleep in her bed her phone going off with people trying to wish her a happy birthday Molly awakens quickly and gets ready as she is late for her own birthday party as she leaves her apartment the hallway is filled with flowers sent to her as a gift as she reaches the lobby the lobby is likewise filled with presents within minutes Molly's character is clear she is a rich socialite New York it girl she embodies a sort of careless fun youthfulness once Molly arrives late to her own birthday party she is thrusted into a series of conversations that begin to make her feel self-conscious about her age at the ripe age of 22 she is held captive in a conversation with women telling her she should get BOTOX to fix the worry lines on her forehead if you know out you can get botox injections for that forehead wrinkle face Factory no appointment necessary Molly manages to find refuge in the bathroom though she is now faced with her own reflection as she meticulously scans her face for signs of aging suddenly an eight-year-old girl emerges from one of the bathroom stalls and Molly and the girl engage in some Woody quips at each other mostly surrounding the maturity or lack thereof of the other I had shoes like yours once when I was five and that was what like three days ago try three years oh excuse me Thumbelina but you're still a little underage to be going out clubbing aren't you you're a little over age be wearing a lampshade in your hair bright idea you brought your own personal stuff hey you want to pick up bacterial meningitis or polio you go ahead and be my guest whatever diseases you're already carrying probably make those sound like a joke anyway little did she know this little girl would have immense impact on her life as she would hers later on in the film Molly's best friend Ingrid finds Molly in the middle of a depressive episode over a boy and when she arrives she discovers that Molly's electricity and gas have been turned off because her bills have not been paid what are all these final notices I'm gonna call him I think now's a good time to call him would you hand me the phone please I'm gonna call it right now Molly Focus for one second your electric has been canceled and so has your gas who pays your bills [Music] Bob Bob who oh my parents guy Bob laughs your phone's dead it is revealed that Bob has stolen millions of dollars from Mali amongst his other clients and fled the country leaving Mali completely broke she's encouraged to get a job and grow up thus Molly is now thrust into a new version of adulthood that she has never experienced before this film does a fantastic job of representing That Awkward stage in young adulthood where you don't quite feel like an adult but you also don't quite feel like a kid either being in your early 20s as a young woman is weird because all of your teeth haven't grown in but you're still worried about getting wrinkles hey am I hideous what as my best friend it is your duty not to lie to me please tell me am I turning into a hideous head Molly asks panicked on her 22nd birthday you hardly know how to take care of yourself yet you feel like your life is passing you by and fear you may be peeking your brain isn't fully developed and yet you feel like there is this pressure to have everything figured out and you feel like you're falling behind suddenly not having a blueprint of where you should be at in order to be successful because some of your friends are still in college some have dropped out some are having babies and getting married some have started a business some are still living with their parents and some are moving abroad Molly finds herself surrounded by people who are telling her to grow up and act her age to get her life together I'll be honest before I re-watched this film based on memory I expected the character Molly to be in her late 20s based on how people in the film spoke about her need to grow up and get her life together I'm not sure if it's because when you watch older people people in films as a kid they feel so much more adult than you could ever be and so my inner child can't fathom being approximately the same age as Molly now but I just found it shocking how adamant people in Molly's life were about Molly's need to grow up when she's only 22. Molly has lived a very uniquely privileged and yet traumatic life her parents were famous rock stars who died suddenly in a plane crash when she was eight leaving her orphaned she has lived a life without any Financial burdens though without the main thing she truly wants and needs sturdy parental figures with the sudden loss of her finances Molly is now forced out of her apartment learn how to do her own laundry and find a job this sequence of the film although from an outside perspective would seem unrelatable if you hadn't grown up in a life-sleeping privilege I found surprisingly relatable as Molly navigates the city as a young woman in her 20s from A New Perspective hopelessly attempting to find her footing in this new and unfamiliar life style it reminded me of when I had first moved to the city and away from my family home young naive and a little clueless trying desperately to find my place feeling slightly embarrassed when I had to call my mom and ask her simple questions about doing laundry or cleaning the toilet likewise Molly is young naive and desperately trying to find her place until she lands a job as a nanny to an eight-year-old girl named Ray oh my God you're my new Nanny hi Lorraine when Molly begins Nanny and Rey they immediately Clash they are simultaneously exact opposites and yet more alike than they would like to admit Rey is an uptight controlling High Strung eight-year-old who acts very mature for her age while Molly is a Carefree childlike fun-loving 22 year old who refuses to grow up at your age not your shoe size the two immediately try and change the other attempting to get the other to act their own age it is evident that the two girls are unable to act their age due to coping mechanisms they have developed in order to process their trauma relating to their parents what was that nobody what's wrong with them look at your bi business shoes it is revealed that Rey's father has been in a coma for years while her mother is largely absent hardly ever speaking to her daughter as she is busy with work and parties as she works in the music industry as a result of her father being sick Rey has developed hypochondria developing my skills as a people person [Music] foreign accomplished [Music] fruit punch my sister drink cyanide at least it's quick got your your drool of my plastic to go [Music] kid have you ever been to a shrink since I was three she is extremely paranoid about germs and illness she refuses to try meat out of fear of developing mad cow disease and dries the dishes with paper towels because she's paranoid of the potential germs on the towel and you don't know how to dry without destroying the environment for every single roll of paper towels that you waste a tree in the rainforest dies and I'm gonna die of botulism from the germs like gunky tally tree loving hippie at least I don't prefer tofu to normal hamburgers my little friend and I'm not the one that's going to get mad cow disease and go nuts though you don't seem to have a brain to fry in the first place oh Ray behaves like this as a response to her father being ill she was raised hardly knowing her father watching him as he lay in a hospital bed in their home lifeless as nurses come in and out to care for him that man in the library in your house nurse said he's in a coma from a massive stroke that's your father huh was he's a vegetable now soon hoping nothing that's kind of harsh it's a harsh world in addition Rey's overachieving nature is a response to her mother's emotional absence her mother is always busy and seemingly could care less about anything to do with her daughter as a response to this Rey has developed the expectation to be perfect in an attempt to Garner her mother's attention she is intelligent disciplined and thrives in her ballet studies she has created a sense of order as a coping mechanism for the chaos of her life Molly however has learned to cope with her trauma of absent parents in an almost opposite way when Molly's parents died she was the same age as Rey in the film just eight years old sometimes when very traumatic events happen to us our brain locks in at the age we are during the trauma as a coping mechanism Molly has lacked the parental discipline throughout her life to develop the skills needed to function as a normal adult there are clues that Molly is a Serial dater and unable to commit to long-term relationships when she becomes infatuated with the musician and her best friend Ingrid says hey we said this guy's practically a monk Molly what the hell are you trying to prove the only reason you're even looking at this guys because you know you can't have him he's a rock and roll poet sex god helps please he'll toss him in a week implying that this is a pattern when Molly eventually brings the musician Neil to her home we later see her laying in the bathtub on the phone with Ingrid hiding from Neil because she declares him to be clingy despite her infatuation with him merely hours ago [Music] guy is still there you always do this when are you gonna grow up [ __ ] help me please you've gotta help me I don't know how to get rid of this poor guy without breaking his heart Molly just a minute Molly [Music] yeah can you take those off I think yeah baby um I'm not a love machine no my boxers can I have them back yeah please thanks what's going on listen I've got to go go away go home Molly the place where I live where I have a life where I do my laundry get sleep try to make music that sort of thing yeah why can't you make me take care this is like the world gone mad like I've stepped through the the looking glass or something there's a week's worth of leftovers a month of laundry I mean come on look at this place no no no you can call the Main Service I've got to go rejoin the human race no no uh I don't understand listen I just feel like I'm suffocating I need some air we can open the window because it's it's not about the windows I just I need my shirt back Neil says that he needs to leave and Molly immediately switches questioning why he would want to leave and asking him not to Neil just says that he needs to go home and work on music and eventually manages to leave speaking as someone who is in this cycle myself it seems as though Molly begins to lose interest in men as soon as they show interest in her though when they leave or are uninterested she is infatuated this is likely a direct result of the trauma she experienced due to her parents dying she equates absence with love yet at the same time she is deeply afraid of people leaving her on the night her parents died it was the first time Molly's parents left to go on tour without her they didn't want her missing any more school but Molly didn't understand and was upset they were leaving her behind she refused to say goodbye to them and eventually fall asleep later that night she was awoken by a maid explaining her parents plane had crashed and they were dead Molly's panicked reaction to Neil leaving seems unwarranted without this context though when you put into perspective her subconscious mind equates the people she loves leaving with death it makes more sense this also explains why she pushes people away and loses interest in men when they begin to have feelings for her her subconscious mind is protecting her from getting hurt by not letting people get too close to her in some ways Rey represents Molly's inner child the scared little girl that lives inside of her who is desperate to be loved and nurtured as Molly helps Rey navigate the trauma inflicted by Rey's parents she is also healing her own wounded inner child Molly nurtures her gray in a way that Rey has never been nurtured before on Molly's first day as Rey's Nanny Molly and Rey begin to argue and Molly begins to leave the house to which Rey says when you work for me you leave when I say you can leave for your information I do not work for you I am employed by your mother oh yeah take a look around do you see her anywhere news flash you're not gonna unless you make an appointment with her assistant or hang around her bedroom door at three o'clock in the morning in the meantime you're working for me on a surface level the scene makes it seem as though Rey is just a bratty bossy spoiled little girl but the heartbreaking reality is when Ray declares Molly will not see Rey's mother unless she makes an appointment with her assistant or hangs around her bedroom door at obscene hours she's actually speaking from experience revealing that this is the only time when Rey can see her own mother in this moment Rey may not realize it but her facade of having everything together begins to crack as Molly and Rey begin to bond Molly eventually opens up to Rey and shares the story of how her parents died last time I saw my mom and dad I was eight going on nine eight years six months and three days almost as old as you are they were going on tour and they were leaving me behind for the first time because they didn't want me missing any more school when they came to my room to say goodbye I wouldn't open the door so they left I fell asleep and then the next thing I knew my nanny was waking me up in the middle of the night telling me their plane had crashed when Molly admits that she had gotten into a fight with her parents before they died Ray responds you're lucky that you were mad see when you're mad you don't miss people and if you stay mad like you never knew them at all that way you don't have to feel sucky about it you're lucky this moment once again reveals the wall that Rey has built up around herself why she is so serious and angry she has built up this wall to protect herself from getting hurt there is one point later on in the film where Rey admits to Molly that at times she likes to go into the library where her father is and read beside him where are you going yeah I don't know maybe the library is that where you went last night I'm not gonna bother him you know I'm just gonna sit there quietly and read or something you can read out loud I think you might like he's a vegetable Molly chatting it up with my dad isn't gonna do anyone any good at all you're the doctor it's not gonna do any good you know I saw this show on TV it was about all these sick people and the ones where their friends and families talk to them they held on 10 times longer than the ones that were left all along that where I swear pinky promise however Rey's father dies the next day when Molly hears the news she rushes over to the house though when she enters Rey's room Molly finds Ray diligently practicing her ballet and Rey refuses to speak to her eventually Rey presses a buzzer that alerts a maid to come to her room the May escorts Molly out explaining Rey's mother Roma would like to speak to her it is revealed that Roma is firing Molly by Rey's request I'm so sorry Mrs shine thanks for coming Miss gun are you kidding nothing could keep me away at a time like this last week's pay and amongst severance severance we're letting you go we that's right me and Ray we good night Miss Gunn I'm sorry but I'm not leaving without an explanation I don't know what's been going on between you and my daughter but she has made it clear she never wants to see you again she must be going in actually she's taking it rather well I was at my afternoon staff meeting when I got the news about my husband I came home to find Ray finishing her homework she's been very calm and level-headed about this whole affair you call that taking it well do you know how to Taj your daughters at in ballet Mrs schlein or that she was banned from her science class for stealing a formaldehyde Pig so that she could give it a proper burial in Central Park and the tea set you got her it's Exquisite and beautiful but do you know how she likes to have her tea how many lumps one lump two cream sugar and the point of your little tirade is that you're right you don't know what goes on between me and Ray because you don't know very much about your own daughter I know my daughter well enough to respect her wishes you don't give her respect you give her whatever she asks for so that you don't have to deal with her she's eight years old she's not 28. the next time you show her some respect the scene demonstrates the deep understanding that Molly has for Rey where others would see Rey's discipline and hard work upon hearing the news of her father's passing as taking it well Molly sees this for what it is a coping mechanism Rey clings to what order and control she has in moments where her life feels out of control and Molly understands this and relates to it and though Rey still has her mother and isn't an orphan like Molly the scene highlights the way in which Rey's mother is emotionally absent from her life later that day Molly receives a phone call from Roma who was panicked because Rey has run away from home Molly says that she hasn't heard from Rey but that she will let her know if she finds her after Molly hangs up the phone she has a feeling she knows where Rey is and immediately heads for Coney Island when Molly arrives at Coney Island she spots Rey sitting on a teacup ride the exact same ride Molly fled to when she discovered her own parents had died [Music] foreign [Music] [Music] [Applause] foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] foreign [Music] to me this is the most beautiful scene in the film The Moment represents Rey finally surrendering to her emotions in this moment she is for the first time unable to control herself and her environment she has no choice but to succumb to her emotions and I believe this is partially because Molly has created an environment of mutual vulnerability in which Rey feels safe enough to collapse and let her guard down I found this quote by Jasmine Lee Corey from the emotionally absent mother how to heal and recognize the invisible effects of childhood neglect that I felt applied to Rey's character so perfectly if you don't have good skills for regulating your emotions as is the case for many who are emotionally neglected or abused you've got a very big stake in avoiding setting off emotions that can lead you to not Venture into life and also avoid going inside it it leaves you with a small emotional range perhaps living primarily in your head the need to avoid can also feed addictions Molly is likely the first person in Rey's life to make an effort to understand her and to get to know her she is the first person to nurture Rey in a way she can feel safe and relaxed and through nurturing Rey Molly allows herself and her inner child to heal I wasn't mad Ray I was confused everyone was talking to me talking talking talking and I couldn't understand a word they were saying I know their voices became a blur and soon I couldn't even recognize their faces they were like these blobs and then they started to grow fangs [Music] and their eyes became green and I knew I had to run away so I packed my knapsack got on the train looked up at the map and decided that I wanted to live in Coney Island I thought it was going to be enough a real Island and I could hide away there like Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn well imagine my surprise the teacups was the only ride they let me on by myself so I got on it and I started spinning myself round and round and round and I feel like I'm still there Spinning Round and Round and Round And The Ride won't stop [Music] this film beautifully tackles grief and abandonment through these two characters Rey and Molly represent coping with trauma in almost opposite ways having all defenses up against your trauma versus being so attached to it that you cannot grow out of it Molly cannot grow up because if she does she must admit to herself that she is not a little girl anymore and that her parents really aren't coming back Rey cannot Release Control from her environment because if she does she fears her entire world will spiral out of control though in each other these two find an anchor you're right Ray I am scared but you're scared too you're as scared as I am and I thought maybe I thought maybe if we could go together Molly says when telling Rey the story of her parents dying at the end of the film Molly is shown applying for fashion School the interviewer for the school says she is confused as to why Molly would want to attend the school seems to me you could skip school and find work with one of your designer friends it would be a lot more fun than toiling away here for four years fundamentals are the building blocks of fun moments later Molly is rushing to make it to raise ballet recital Ray performs a special performance and suddenly several ballerinas appear and they are holding a guitar that belonged to Molly's father the guitar collection that only days ago Molly reluctantly had to sell in order to afford rent is revealed to have been bought by Neil who is on stage with Rey playing the song Molly's father wrote about her called Molly smile Rey dances to the song and combines traditional ballet with more childlike freestyle movements at the end of the performance the audience claps and Molly and Rey stare at each other smiling knowing they have changed each other's lives forever every story has an end but in life every ending is just a new beginning the dynamic between Molly and Rey is an important Dynamic that is not represented enough in film I have rarely if ever seen another film that explores the kinship and bond between a young girl and an older woman who is not related to you the idea of an older woman who is not your mother playing an integral role in your development I am blessed to have a great relationship with my mother but I have also been blessed to be surrounded by various women in my life who were not my relatives though they were necessary figures in my life I have met many women in my life growing up whom I would refer to as second mothers aunties or older sisters there is a moment at the end of the film after Ray and Molly have reconciled after their fight and Rey says you can have your job back you know I think so you and I we're gonna be friends okay grown-ups never stay friends with kids I don't see any grown-ups around here I do in many ways I feel as though I relate to both Rey and Molly they represent the dichotomous aspects of myself on one hand I am Molly childish and fun loving not wanting to grow up and on another hand I am Rey disciplined and hardworking in order to give myself the illusion of control I think many of us can see ourselves represented in both Rey and Molly I think these two are both such beautifully written characters flawed in many ways but deeply relatable in conclusion Molly and Rey are my favorite nepotism babies I also just wanted to note how brilliant the performances by both Dakota Fanning and Brittany were in this film both of these actresses exuded such unwavering honesty in their portrayal of these characters these two actresses delivered such a perfect balance of comedic timing and raw heart-wrenching moments which I feel is very hard and rare especially at Dakota Fanning's age and there was a very clear real love that Dakota and Brittany had for each other in real life as well and I feel as though this real love translated so well onto screen I need to share these behind the scenes photos of Dakota and Brittany because when I saw them they just made my heart melt they are so cute and that is all for this video thank you so much for watching and joining me in this conversation about Uptown Girls bye

Channel: Final Girl Studios

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Id: qxai1ZBcTmI

Length: 33min 22sec (2002 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 04 2022