Ukrainian Girl Opens Up About Dating In Sweden

okay guys today we're gonna tap into a mysterious part of the Swedish dating world with a fresh perspective from my friend Alina and where are you from Molina I'm from Ukraine I'm so fascinated with cultural differences and Sweden has such a unique dating culture I mean they've even written books about how strange the dating culture is in Scandinavia so I'm really curious from your side have you noticed the difference between like uh making the first move because this is something in the U.S and Sweden is so different that like girls will approach you here in Sweden at least from what I've experienced whereas there's like a lot more pressure on the guide to like take the lead in the US what is that experience okay then it's quite similar in Ukraine like in the States because in Ukraine for a girl to approach first that would be kind of like a red flag or it would be counted as the girl is like desperate read or she really like wants family he is like she's kind of like on her last coach on the train or whatever you you say the last coach or she's trying to jump on the last coach or on the train we got it so it's like frowned upon if a girl approaches a guy yeah it's like it's just like we don't do it yeah it's just it's just not a horse example is both not my culture and it's not my character so once I got here and my friends like for example you were like if you like the guy you just need to go and approach him or like show him that you're interested and I was like what like how do you even do that I mean I've never dated Swedish guys before but from what I've like picked up from talking to my friends is that they are a bit more reserved so there's nothing wrong about like taking the first move as a woman whereas in like other countries it's it's less likely it seems like one thing I notice is very different between Sweden and other countries is that Swedish people in general do not hold eye contact for very long like if you go to Germany for example you feel like everyone's staring at you but it's just like the culture of that people lock eyes a bit longer in the eye contacts there it's the same in the U.S and it sort of opens up the door to small talk and opens up the door for people to make an approach whereas in Sweden it's hard to make an approach because as soon as somebody looks that you they like look away very quickly because they want to respect your personal space in a way so it's not as inviting for a guy to maybe make the approach here yeah I think it depends actually Where You Are if you come to a bar and like you're with some friends and like you just look at the guy like that can be fine but I mean like in everyday life maybe like I do notice sometimes guys like just like looking at me but I do not like respond I can't say again that I'm very like um certain girl I'm not looking for a man how often would you say you would get approached in in person in Ukraine like I'd say that there is someone like making a compliment or just like saying something or like you know like looking or just yeah doing something every day the guys are quite um initiative they're more taken that's maybe yeah the thing that they are willing and wanting and like they are taught to do the first move so it's like if you do not do the first move like the girl will not know that you actually like her like you want to find out more about her how often would guys make the first move with you in Sweden would you say since you've been here only only I'd say like if for example in the street or like in a grocery it's mostly like man like 50 or 60 plus okay like very cute grandpas who are just like very nice and like they are they have no problem talking like for example just right now when I was coming to you I I came in and there was a a man like maybe 65 years old and he was like holding the elevator for me and he was like do you wanna you know come into the elevator do you want to join I was like yeah sure yeah so I ran into the elevator and then like we had a small talk which I know doesn't really happen in Sweden that often so I do feel like man like over 50 let's say they are more open and approachable and which is like nice like kind of like in Germany it doesn't mean anything like you know you I will probably never see him again but it just it was a nice experience and it doesn't really mean anything so this is this is kind of interesting because I just started watching the Swedish Bachelorette with my girlfriend I'd never seen The Bachelorette in Sweden so one girl and like I don't know 20 guys in this house and I felt like because I'd seen The Bachelorette in the US I felt like the Swedish guys were like sort of kind of awkward like when they would go out on dates or like spend time with the girl it would be the the girl the woman who was like initiating the conversation like Lee taking the lead driving asking them the questions and like a lot of times they like come to hang out while I want and they just kind of like stand there and she's like yeah how's everything going they're like yeah it's good and then they just kind of like wait for her to like take the next step where I was like I felt like in the American Bachelorette like the guys were like doing crazy stunts and fighting for the attention and the drama I mean America is just like a very dramatic place in general I would say which is not always a good thing but I mean it makes the TV really interesting so but I can say that it's quite similar in Ukraine that and the guys are I I don't know I don't want to say that they are expected to do certain things but it's just more of a culture let's say and this is a common theme that the guy like makes the first move and he like shows it to the girl that he cares that he like he wants to have a relationship with a girl by like doing certain actions and like for example in the beginning especially there is a lot of romance and a lot of beautiful dates Beautiful Moments the guy shows that he has serious intentions rather than just like you know um I don't know messing around for a while yeah and just like not having anything we do not jump into the relationship or like you know intimate relationship right away so we do need time to get to know the person first like to get to know you as a person rather than like you know getting physical yeah first two things I think are really interesting is like the Scandinavian Community like people that live here they have a lot of trust with each other so maybe it's easier when like casually dating because there's so much trust within like the community and the society like in general that there's not as much like pressure or like this this sort of uneasiness but also at the same time I feel like people have a harder time committing to a relationship like I was so shocked coming from my background and my upbringing maybe it's like a big city Stockholm thing I feel like a lot of people would like have core course or like basically friends with benefits and be sleeping around with multiple people and maybe that's just me being older and recognizing it more because I was pretty young when I moved here I do think that there's less like pressure on getting physically intimate with somebody here compared to what I was used to back home in the US and so like what you're saying like once you start to get physical with somebody it starts to signify okay this is a more serious this is like the relationship track and it's like this book that I just read called sex you should give it to me before coffee you need to read this book actually I'm going to link this book Down Below in the description I'm in this book a few times because I was interviewed for this book uh sex before coffee it's the book about dating in Scandinavia and very very interesting because like the name of the book signifies a lot of times you go out in Scandinavia you meet somebody at a party or something and then you hook up and if the sex is good then you go up the next day and you have a coffee together or you go out for a fika date whereas in most countries that's backwards use see if you like each other first and then you get physical but here it's like you test the merchandise and something that you want to continue with so completely backwards yeah it's completely outside of at least my box but it's interesting and it is a lot to do with the history there is always a reason why one or another culture is that or the other way it's just the way it is and it's interesting just to see and to compare the cultures and to try to understand another culture I think it's really important to be open-minded and to be accepted right acceptive and just like try to understand other person's point of view and I think with different cultures there can be something beautiful and new coming out so for example once I got back here and I went out on a date with a Swedish guy it was very special because he made an effort to prepare before meeting me and he was very very cute by like telling me that he actually like read but on on Google and he found like some videos on YouTube for example like how it is today the Ukrainian girl or how do you a product research yes he did every word and it was so so cute like nobody has ever done that like at least I haven't heard that you know that swedes do that before meeting like someone from another culture he he drove me back home after our date he he was like on the way in the car he was like there is one thing I want to do but I am so afraid to forget about that so please let me like remind me if I forget by the end of the ride okay feel like you know it's like what can it be like you know what is he have it on his mind he brought me home and then he was like okay please don't don't move don't do anything just give me a minute I was like okay and then he goes around the car and he opens the door in front of me and I don't remember if he actually like what do you say like um open the door no but you put the hat like you yeah okay you don't do that you don't know how to say it offered his hand yeah okay offered uh his his hand I didn't remember if he did that but he opened the door and he was like I read it on the internet that you do that in Ukraine like guys do that and I was like yeah sure like they do but it was so cute like in his interpretation because he's he was like I've never done it in my life before but I am willing to do it for you that is pretty cute so he was cute and my point was that you know by learning and by being open to other cultures we can create something beautiful and new together and there could be something really special coming out yeah I have one last question for you okay what is your one of the almost two years that you've spent in Sweden what is like your top number one favorite thing about like Swedish guys good looking yeah good looking would you say they're good looking yes they are definitely okay yes then that's a good one and I know it's all you Swedish guys in the comments section you're good looking you heard it here first all right they've probably heard that before or or actually I like always say to my girlfriends once we meet up like here like Swedish girlfriends and other cultures like I say the Swedish guys have all the potential to be at Most Wanted man in the world so go out there and use your potential we believe in you see you guys

Channel: Stefan Thyron

Views: 26,939

Keywords:

Id: 4ADhYaVkHlw

Length: 12min 5sec (725 seconds)

Published: Thu Jan 26 2023