Tyson Fury VS The Gypsy King: My FULL UNTOLD Story

I have two different very different lives I have Tyson Fury who I was born and then I have the Gypsy King I couldn't tell him apart this week on high performance see a new side to the Gypsy King Tyson Fury I'd always set myself to be heavyweight champion of the world there was a lot of trauma and [ __ ] that went on this is not going to sink in because I've got Klitschko to be there wasn't one day that went by that I didn't want to die or wish death upon myself I even asked God to kill me how are people around you responding yeah they thought depression was this word they would just say man up pull yourself together all the [ __ ] that you don't want to wear your dad said to me you've got the whole world in your hand you're still not happy people out there ain't got bread toy what brought you out of it but I heard a voice and it said think about your kids and I heard it say pull over and that was the moment that I knew I had to go see these doctors it was pretty scary not scary as heading towards that bridge bang it this big eye curb and break up jumping out the car and throwing the keys down the road it was terrifying frightening experienced I've ever had in my life could imagine my dad here in that bipolar disorder anxiety was it good for you for the first time in your home to have Clarity for someone to say this is what you've got this is it I felt like the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders tomorrow we start the regain Mission this career is going to be so much different to before and I've actually grew an obsession with time farewell goodbye forever Adele this is the end the punch that finished that fight 94 000 at Wembley it was an epic moment to go why not stop then so here's what happened why am I back what is high performance in your mind Tyson high performance to me is high octane full energy full attack Victory and everything that comes of it that's what high performance is to me so how do you develop a mindset that allows you to be at that level and we will talk in depth in these podcasts about the fact that it isn't always plain sailing for you but I think self-belief is probably at the core of your own version of high performance right self-belief um from a very very early age now I want to go quite deep into this so the listeners can sort of get to know how I've become such a high performance fat man and I would put it down to my mental health OCD addictive behavior that I have um obsessive compulsive disorder so if you're obsessive about anything it can be unhealthy but if you're obsessive about your job that will equal usually success and I have been and still am very obsessive about my job um from a little kid I've outworked everybody I've ever been with and for a heavyweight that takes a lot of doing I'm a man 20 stone I can I can outwork people nine Stone featherweights in the gym which is unumanly impossible however I've managed to do it over the years um just with the attitude of no retreat and no surrender and just keep going and pushing yourself and I have actually found a very comfortable seat in my most uncomfortable areas and if you can do that if he can run at the level of finding a comfortable position in your mouth uncomfortable circumstances that's where you're going to be successful or or high performance in your area and I have found that I can find solace in the hardest toughest darkest places but I've managed to do that from experience and practice and you know I test myself a lot all the time I'm always testing I'm always testing the Gypsy King Tyson Fury the man will test the Gypsy King to the utmost point where explain that so the way I have sort of structured my life in able to cope with stuff like I have two different very different lives like I have Tyson Fury who I was born and named who is a husband a father a son a mental health patient about a guy who's interested in boxing boxing fun a very flawed character very flawed very normal fat bald lazy at times um and then I have the Gypsy King who has never ever suffered with any problems who has never had any complications in his life who was just mental concrete and that person is what I believe unbeatable so tell us about the origins of that then because you've grown I'm interested in this one a couple of areas one is we know your dad you know he's very notable figure but they're probably a mum never really gets mentioned and I'm interested in that for Tyson Fury yeah the man but then I'm also interested in when you develop this mask or this cloak of invincibility of the Gypsy King so if we can take it in turn to talk to us about your mum so before we start talking about the mother I just want to go start going like the first book I wrote was called behind the mask so in around about 2013 14 15 16. I got lost in between these two characters Tyson Fury and Gypsy King got entangled and I couldn't tell him apart I couldn't live different lives it was just one life rolled into one and I knew that that was very unhealthy allowed to get back to being myself and split these two things how did that manifest itself I don't know a long time of of doing the same thing and being so super confident and like I say these characters have always been separate and then all of a sudden emerged what happened then like were you just being I just I just couldn't snap out of character I had to just even at home with Paris even at home even behind the scenes anything I just couldn't couldn't um to find the two men it was very very hard for me and I was it was almost like I was lost in in a movie script and I couldn't get out of it um I had to be this big Brash confident um outspoken controversial figure all the time yeah yeah and it was unrecognizable for me wife like someone was this this person she knew from being 15 16 years old to seeing like how I'd become this badass character in a movie and even like I'm thinking like this is not me really and I knew if I was ever gonna have a happy life I had to get back to being the person I was in the beginning and try and separate these two things and it was pretty difficult it was just to a process of all these things coming together and then emerging but I believe it it had to happen to me this had to happen in order for me to get through to something and be who I am today so at one point in my career there was always the expectation of oh don't worry about anything because Tyson's going to come and he's going to publicize everything and the show's going to be run on his back I was just like one of those little circus monkeys that you wind up and he's going to go to work and he's got everything's going to be fine and I almost took that responsibility don't worry I will do everything just sit back and relax Watch Me Go and I become like a performing Act and there was just no filter there was no switch off there was no there was no being me and being not me I was this performer and I was going to live up to it you taught really movingly in the book about this actually the phrase you use you say I compartmentalize my mental health like Odd Socks being shoved in a drawer explain that to us you know you just get on with it you I took that responsibility on and it was almost like a manifestation over time and just put it all into practice put it into play on a daily basis until it got to the point where I couldn't be myself anymore I didn't know what was me and what wasn't I didn't know how I was before until I obviously had the mental breakdown and then I finally realized that to try and live up that that that pace for such a long time is very unhealthy with every big high there's always an even bigger low for me so this character will morph like a Power Ranger or a an anime character I'll morph into this this guy and then there's always massive lows afterwards like big depressions and anxiety and everything after these big events even now even now yeah so after the Wembley fight obviously was the higher the highs the lower the lows will always be for me but I've figured out how to manage this over time so what I like to do now is I know it's coming after these big events I'm going to be down most of the times I have Suicidal Thoughts which is kind of crazy even to sit here and admit today after all these big events and these these big successes I'm like proper suicidal for a few days what do you mean by that like the like how how seriously are these just like want to die type of thing but I know from experience now that this is going to move in a few days a week I always say to Paris like after these fights just let me have a bit of space try not give me too much tasks to do and I'll be back in a week I'll be I'll be back to normal in a week or so and do you stay with the family stay with the family and what I like to do is I like to get myself straight back to Grassroots straight away like the day after the fight I'll go out of a few beers of the boys type of thing but I'll be back doing my jobs like I'll be back doing the bins and tip runs and people say sorry on Saturday yesterday fighting in London like and I'm at the tip the next day on Sunday in Morecambe with loads of rubbish and stuff and let's get myself straight back to normal stuff like back Monday morning dropping the kids off and people it brings me back to normal it brings me back to normal being who I am I know I have to be a provider a carer that sort of person this is such a valuable conversation for us to be having because people as people see the Gypsy King right because he's the guy that's on the Telly he's the guy that has the fights he's the guy in the press conferences they very rarely see this which is Tyson Fury the man talking in this way and people assume if you're successful everything's easy I really want you to if you can explain what you've learned about why your brain does this because there will be people listening to this who have the same thing but it scares the life out of them they haven't learned to deal with it and they may well be on the edge and this may well be the conversation that makes the difference for them what would you say to those people they haven't yet found the clarity to learn to live with it you know the first thing that I would say to anybody is After experiencing all these things like you can't do on your own communication is the key like I was so long I come from a big tough family of all fighters and nobody shows emotion or no one everyone just like keeps everything to themselves oh everything's great and that sort of stuff so I know what it's like not to have anybody to speak to about anything and I know what it's like to be almost ashamed of saying like I'm severely unwellia and I need need help because needing help for me has been it's almost like I don't need help from anything I'm Tyson Fury I fight my way out of anything but the sooner I realized I couldn't do it on my own the sooner I got back well again and I think admitting to yourself that you've got a problem whether you've got an alcohol problem or a drug problem or whatever problem you may have acceptance is the key first you can all see it but if I don't accept that I've got a problem that needs working out then I'll be in denial forever but the sooner I can come to grips and admit to myself I've got a problem I can start to recover from it and my advice to anyone suffering with any sort of mental health or any sort of issue is get straight to the seek medical advice immediately because the sooner you go and do that sooner you figure [ __ ] out like that then soon you can get back to what is normal for you and and I remember I I've been suffering with these mental health problems from being a little boy like all my life I remember what I now know as anxiety I didn't know back then when I was kid why young like small enough to hide in a wardrobe and be anxious inside a dark wardrobe um five years old six years old I'd have these feelings of like I'm going to be left behind but no one we wasn't going anywhere it was I didn't understand that I had no education on Mental Health and up until a few years ago like it wasn't this big open widespread thing throughout the world and there was no world mental health days and there wasn't no it's okay not to be okay and all that it was like no it was all hush hush under the carpet stuff and I didn't I didn't understand like all the way through my life I had this down one day up the next up and down up and down up and down anxious anxious anxious but didn't know what it was and I suppose I I learned how to sort of handle it with focusing on a certain goal and the gold that I had the goal I had was an unreachable goal and to give myself this unreachable goal give me Focus right beyond the problems that I was going through on a daily basis I I'd always set myself to be heavyweight champion of the world so there's seven billion people in the world so you're a newborn baby what's the odds in becoming this Impossible Dream which is an Impossible Dream you take a newborn baby today and say right whatever it is right I'm gonna be the World Heavyweight Champion it's very unlikely it's an enrichable unreachable dream and I give myself that dream and focused on it that much I wasn't I didn't allow myself to get caught up with all the mental health stuff along the way because I always had Klitschko on my mind from being 14 years old klitschko's world heavyweight champion or right up there you know what I mean I was used to watching him on TV and always my plan was always to beat Vladimir and I always thought to myself whoever beats Vladimir it's going to become a legend in this game such a long Reign so I had a lot of trauma going in my life from being that age too becoming champion I was very close to my uncle you died um I was actually in a training camp when he was when he was when he I was about to fight I was about to go to a weigh-in and yeah we got the news that he died and it was just like oh my God he injured himself hadn't he in a had an accident yeah he had an accident he ended up getting a blood clot in his leg and and died um he was a diabetic type type one or two I can't remember but he um he died and at the same time he was in in a coma my wife was in um the hospital the same the the Women's Hospital next door have given birth to a dead child so there was a lot of unhappiness going on in my life and so it was uh and I always like put it always to the back of my mind because I was thinking I don't have time now to be upset about this I need to be upset when I beat Klitschko if that makes any sense yes so there was a lot of a lot of trauma and [ __ ] that went on that I put to the back of my mind and I was like I can't focus on any of this now this wasn't that wasn't the only stuff there was a lot of other stuff as well that went on but I was like nope nothing I can't this is not going to sink in because I've got Klitschko to be and until that day I will not focus on anything other than beating Klitschko and it was all a process even if it wasn't fighting Klitschko which I wasn't at that time I was fighting the final Eliminator to fight glitch coaches Ora too yeah but I was wasn't thinking about chisora or any of these other guys it was always about becoming World Heavyweight Champion or nothing and did you ever plan for after beating Cleveland no because that was Everest and I remember just laying there thinking I hope this is not a dream please don't wake up in a minute I'm thinking like and after that that feeling thinking like I was just lying there when my eyes are open and I couldn't sleep and I was thinking like I I will be fulfilled if I die in her right now like I'm very happy with what I've done and I'm thinking like I don't have any more purpose in my life anymore like I was thinking right I die now I'm just that's it I'm happy but at the time I started two kids my wife just told me the day before she was pregnant with our third child and I've just won the world title and everything was hunky-dory but for me it was like that's it I've achieved my lifelong dream like I'm gonna die now that's it I was 27. had everything that was possible to have had a family I had achievement I had money I had Fame I had everything but at that moment from about 16 months I'd say there wasn't one day that went by that I didn't want to die or wish death upon myself I even asked God to kill me I'm being religious person as well someone who's feared Gordon yeah and had that in my life forever I'd pray and say why have I woke up today so here's the question right not having not having purpose we can all understand that and all of us have had moments in our lives where we feel yeah I'm lacking a bit of direction here that's a long way away from not wanting to be on the on the earth so what what was the reason for for wanting to be dead now that is the billion dollar question my friend so if I could answer that question I wouldn't be a boxer would I be a multi-billionaire because if I could pinpoint a moment in everyone's life where that's what went wrong let's move that I raise it a little bit explain it to him and everything's great now then it won't be it wouldn't be but did you know it was irrational like that this wasn't normal it was like I said earlier on it was this buildup of all these shitty events that went on in my life and everything that I'd been I'd been bottling up over the years and at that moment everything that I put to the back of the queue I was now thinking about and mourning for and all that sort of stuff and I always try to explain it like if you get a bottle of champagne and Shake It Up it's going to explode sooner or later in it than to pop the Cork's gonna pop off but I can't really figure out there wasn't one single moment in my life that made that happen it was years and years and years of wanting something so much that nothing else mattered and being very very obsessed with this goal and then achieving it and it was like okay that's it now I'm happy with that but now I'm ready to die I suppose I had that feeling of when you're an old man and you're retired and you've achieved everything and you're a grandparent maybe a great grandparent and you you're ready to just move on and I must have had those emotions and Valence because I was really ready to maybe make a like 27 I had everything to live for I even had kids how selfish was I thinking I suppose when you're very mentally unwell you don't think about anything else other than self-destruct and other than yourself because it's a very selfish thing um no matter what I've tried to think about like think about my kids think about me why I think about everything that it didn't matter to me because a normal straight thinking person would say this is madness you've got all this family going on even you don't want a box to get boxing live for your family you have everything going on for someone who's not thinking well can't put that into reason that doesn't it's not a a thought that I would I would take on board and process so how's mental health viewed from the people around you so you describe now growing up people didn't talk about this kind of thing so when they're hearing you have these conversations or talk about I'm going to finish I could die tomorrow if I needed to how are people around you responding yeah again no experience on it they didn't understand they wasn't educated on it they were just like guys he's a silly person he's like wanting attention or he's like he's got me dad said to me even in a circle guard me Brothers No One understood what I was going through didn't know what Depression was or so what were they saying he thought depression was this word or whatever they would just saying man up pull yourself together all the [ __ ] that you don't want to wear yep think about this you got this going on your dad said to me you've got the whole world in your hand and you're still not happy there's people out there who haven't got bread to eat you can see how that makes you feel worse though and what was the effects on you when you're hearing that you're looking around yeah I was thinking like why can't I shake this off like yeah I should be able to I should be able to blow it out my nose of this and I was making myself worse thinking why can't I shift this why not I'm trying to get rid of it all the time and he just went from bad to worse people will never really understand the extent of how bad I was I was pretty [ __ ] up um and what was the worst moment yeah the lowest point the lowest points obviously is the attempting suicide but before that was in the car was it yeah but before this for quite a long time I was hearing voices in my mind clear as day and that is a frightening experience so tell us about that what do you mean by that what that whose voice was it I don't know what they're saying I don't know whose voice it was but it was a clear voice and it would be telling me to kill myself on all sorts it was like I was possessed by a demon or something without sounding like a crazy person on someone who's watched a horror movie right it was a terrifying experience I can tell you that it was absolutely horrifying so where were you I'd be letting me bed and I could hear all these voices and I could hear screams and all sorts of [ __ ] going on I was like oh my God it got to a point where I couldn't go to bed anymore sober because when I was absolutely steaming I didn't hear these voices right and during like my my normal moments sanest moments in life I I do not fear anything I don't feel dying I don't fear anything is not a scary thing to me I don't give a [ __ ] about nothing really however at this moment I was scared like a little child had been in bed like this all anxious and holding my hands tight and grinding me to oh I was on a right state and I figured out like if I go and have a few drinks I can just like sort of knock out and go to bed and and not not feel yeah not hear these voices and not feel anxious and can I ask like were you abuser before this when you're on the journey up to classical no you'd never you were a big drinker no no well I had a couple of drinks in that but it wasn't a big a big drinker yeah so good I figured out that that's how to make this problem go away short time but I have to keep doing that for a long period of time obviously it's a mask it only masks the problem for a minute and then you wake up the next day or the week later and you're even worser deeper in a darker hole and at this time I was getting fatter by the day as well and I believe a lot of my problems are Eating Disorders as well and I'm always ballooning up in weight all the time if I don't concentrate on it forever every day then I just get fatter by the day even today like I can go from like 19 Stone 10 to I'd say I'd be 30 Stone in one year if I didn't eat train every day like a lunatic and he tried try to be sensible as well so I'm getting fatter by the day I'm drinking every day I'm hearing voices in my mind I don't want to live anymore I don't care about anything I'll tell him in a dark place people say to me oh you lost 10 stone and you come back weight loss is a very easy thing for me like I've even in before I fought Klitschko I walked into camp at 24 Stone 10 pounds and I thought glitch got 18 stone three 12 weeks later so I've always been able to get weight on and off can I jump out though sorry I don't mean to be rude but I'm intrigued like you diagnosing a lot of this stuff now like eating disorders and some of these mental health issues but I want to go right back to the start of your journey you've referenced some of the trauma you had like Huey and Paris having a stillborn baby what's happened to you in that period that now you can look back and see some of these seeds of dysfunction was starting to be sown is there anything you can identify what do you mean like the moment that I I could realize what was going on but just growing up you know you described in that moment of like locking yourself in a wardrobe and fighting you're going to get left behind you know yeah and so the seeds of these kinds of dysfunctions are often sold in childhood something happens I truly believe that all of these these things start from a childhood well you tell me what a five or six year old like I've got a five or six year old at home what has he got to be anxious about but that's what I'm asking is it Dad I don't think there was a trigger point no right could it be possible that you're born with this and it's developed over time right I've like I think so so I have an anxious daughter and she's nine years old now and she exactly sure it's very interesting you're describing from an adult perspective knowing it's irrational people saying you'll be fine making it worse she's she she's exactly the same we leave the house and it's a totally irrational fear that we're going out and then when we say you'll be fine she's another makes me feel worse because I know I'll be fine but I have this feeling in my stomach like I know I'll be fine dad but I'm scared I'm scared witless because you're leaving the house and I believe that it is these are things we're born with but I also believe right that everything has a price so I think there's a very good case here that without all of the emotional challenges that you've been through there's no way we're sitting here talking to you now it was the heavyweight champion of the world I think that you don't get one without the other do you believe yeah I do believe you're um probably correct because everything we have to experience is all a part of our journey like a jigsaw piece but I'm just trying to go back now I'm searching the mind for traumatic moments as a child and I can go back to 1997 we had a sister born I mean mother had 14 kids and 10 of them died and forth okay now yeah that's horrific isn't it so imagine like all these miscarriages some of them were born some of them were still born and these these after you're born so you're like in between after before all this sort of stuff yeah and I remember like me that she said oh they were all boys and and when she was finally pregnant with her daughter the last one and this this daughter was like ah we can't wait we're getting a sister finally after all these years and um so my mother was like fully pregnant like heavily like nine months ready because well she went into the hospital she had the baby and the baby was unwell he had she had like lung problems and underdeveloped lungs and whatever anyway she ended up living for a few days and I'm dying and it was a was a horrible sort of experience so so nine years old that's quite a horrific moment isn't it but yeah yeah I always remember that so that might have been a could have been a trigger trigger moment in my life but was that the beginning of it I don't think so but what I mean I believe I remember being in that wardrobe before all this so maybe that was a an adjective to it all as well yeah however I can't pinpoint Acura see what was the event or moment that made this happen so what are you doing different than with your kids than what maybe you experienced as a child that you think might help them avoid some of these mental health challenges so yeah like with our kids like we've had I think we've had like four miscarriages and we've sort of kept that away from the kids kids don't need to know about all that sort of stuff right so if we have a problem like adult problems I I don't let the kids know about it um how old's your oldest my oldest she's 13 today happy birthday to her yeah have you shared with her what you're sharing with us does she know about her dad's struggles she knows about that struggles but not I don't think she really understands in-depth problems so we had this little moment the other night like I go all my kids in and me and Paris sat down on the bed and we asked them like do you ever say he was arguing or but well when's the last time you saw Mom and Dad fighting and we were surprised at the results of this quote they couldn't remember Venezuela remembered it a time about four or five years ago decent and other than that they haven't really they couldn't mention anything that they've seen such as I was very proud of that moment and yeah I like that's a very good thing for me because the last thing that I want my kids to experience is is their parents problems like all relationships of arguments and ups and downs and packs and forwards well that's should be private from the kids and was it for you for me it wasn't no right for me as a kid it was my dad was up and down it was arguments you know what I mean my dad was a bit of a party animal back in his day a bit of a Jack to Lad boxer up and down Jack about town and all that yeah so you'd be going on Benders for two days and coming back I mean mother would be screaming and you can imagine yeah so I suppose that might have had a an effect on it all as well and and I just didn't want that for my kids now I know if I'm listening to this conversation I'm thinking well I've Just Seen Tyson fight recently I know that there's talk about him carrying on fighting or maybe not carrying on fighting but he seems okay yeah so we've talked about the darkest moments and you know you've gone on record of saying that you were in your sports car you looked at a bridge and you thought I'm going to kill myself yeah what brought you out of it again this is going to sound strange but I heard a voice again and it said don't do this think about your kids growing up with an old dad and you're going to be labeled as a weak piece of [ __ ] for taking an easy way out and leaving everybody and abandoning everybody and I heard it say pull over and I pulled over and at that time my heart was beating at me but it was in the zone the death zone and I [ __ ] I feel all the tears coming down and I was like I was hyperventilating everything and that was the moment that I knew I had to go see these doctors straight away regardless of what anybody thought of me and whatever it was going to be I had to go and find my way back to to the light and how scary it was going to seek help it was pretty scary not scary as heading towards that bridge 180 miles an hour however it was pretty scary because this was going to be the first time that I was going to go seek medical advice and tell some strange manner in my mind at the time was just going to go and tell his mates in the pub later just thought every Weight champion of the world he's the right [ __ ] you've told me all these problems having a few beers not thinking this man's a professional doctor private confidentiality like this is how irrational I was thinking thinking this doctor's gonna go out of his piles later and divulge all my private business so I'm thinking this is going to be crazy so I just thought you know what I don't give a [ __ ] what he's gonna do I'm gonna go there I've done some research about places to go and people to see and I started going to these to the I don't know if they call them psychiatrists no it's Americans or psychologists or psychiatrists yeah and my dad won't remember the shame but maybe the little brother you were with me at the time after this car situation my dad and my brothers were living with me in my house in Morgan Lancaster because they thought like he's gonna do something bad to himself and [Music] before that a little bit before this I had this first time ever had this anxiety attack and a panic attack at the same time and I 100 thought I was gonna die that day before the everything else this was a day that I was going to die for sure like I thought it was on a heart attack where were you I was I went out with me mate Dave all day we're just doing normal jobs because at this time I wasn't boxing I was fat as anything I was I was unwell so we made David come down and take me out for the day and just like he he does like uh windows and doors and conservatories and stuff and we just drive around and like he'd go like giving his uh quotations and stuff and seeing the customers and whatever and I'd just go around for the for the banter with him for the day and I remember we went out and I I dropped him back off at ease and Paris had told me he said right it is five minutes away so I thought he made Davis he was only he lives two miles from mine and as I left him this is gonna sound crazy the whole world went into Postman Pat like a cartoon and I was thinking what the [ __ ] is this like I was thinking I can't make it back home I'm not gonna make this home and like everything was like in cartoon type world yeah and I was thinking wow I've got to pull over I've got I was thinking like I've gotta pull over I can't see and then me my may I vision went to like looking through a tube like this so I I was in a in the car I pulled it over and I'm right in the middle of the road it was a big high curb like that and I tried pulling him banging this big eye curb and if I can't pull over here gotta pull over a bit further so I've got got past the like the McDonald's I drive past pulled into the first lay-by I remember pulling up and break up jumping out the car and throwing the keys down the road I like her set off running I'm like what the [ __ ] is going on this is this is the crazy Moment by the way I pulled this car over still moving I pulled down break up jumped out the door type of thing as it's still going he's out threw him down the street and set off running down the footpath away and I'm thinking [ __ ] you doing go get your keys you've left your keys in the middle of Road run back got the keys and then I'm running down the road again and I can feel my heart like I've had a heart attack I've had a stroke may I have my vision's gone I can't breathe I'm dying and I'm thinking I'm walking I'm I'm literally waiting to die and I've been calling to God I said please God forgive me and me sins I'm thinking like I'm about to make me make a this was hit like this was it a snow coming back let's just say I'm dying and at that moment after I'd set down prayers like forgive me of these sins I was about to to put dead yeah after that moment the only thing I thought about was my kids there was no like life flashing before me and I saw all my childhood and all that shite this was like imminent death 100 I'm gonna die and the only thing I thought about before death was how many kids are going to survive on their own and I've really [ __ ] things up and I'm thinking why have I not died why haven't I died I'm not I'm having a heart attack but I'm not dying and I said to people walking down the streets I'm having an attack please call an ambulance sweater God this is the truth you were in such a that this is a real Mental Health crisis this is a breakdown yes but at the time I'm having a heart attack I've gone blind I can't see hardly I phoned David said Dave come and get me quick I'm having a heart attack and you'd had a good day with him you'd have yeah normal day like normal and I don't know what brought on or what happened and he said where are you I said I'm just around the corner from yours come and get me I'm on the main road he come in the car but I'd already flagged the van down and I said to the guy the driver please take me to the hospital I'm having a heart attack so jumps in this build as well and he's like what the [ __ ] was going on mate I'm taking Josh but I said whoa there's me I'm jumping out with him jumped out of that van got in his van and I'm thinking he knew what was going on because he knew he knew about panic attacks and stuff Dave yeah and he said to me calm down you're having a panic attack and he was driving slow and I said why the [ __ ] are you driving storm of an attack you silly bastard get to the [ __ ] hospital he's like you're not having a heart attack you're having a panic attack I said I'm Gonna Knock You spark out driving his wheel I said get me to the [ __ ] hospital I said if I asked you my best mate I said if you tell me you're on heart attack I'm gonna get you straight there he's doing 30 miles an hour he goes you don't need Hospital you need to go for a walk which is not what you want to hear and I'm like okay this is it then you're involved in this plot to kill me too then are you oh wow you went there so then I'm thinking right this is my best mate in the world been my best mate for the last 10 years uh before this as well yeah now I'm thinking right this is the plot now he's trying to kill me so I was thinking right he's going to pull this fan up I'm just gonna have to knock him out cold and I'm gonna have to run away because he's obviously trying to kill me he's going to try and push me in a river or when he takes me on this walk he's gonna try and do me so I'm thinking all these things I said Dave I said do you know he'd try anything out on me I said I'm gonna do you he's like what are you talking about I said I've told you to take me to the hospital and you want to take me on a walk I said you are trying to kill me and it's like right I'm taking to the hospital anyway he's putting the radio on I'm thinking I can hear voices in the radio speaking to me I was like proper gun I got to the hospital I don't run into the hospital and I said to the people I said check me out I said someone's drugged me or I've had a heart attack I said take me blood now I said I might have Anthrax in my system so this is what I'm thinking all these crazy things see but see I'm struck when you describe it as crazy because that to me as you describe it it's just somebody's seriously unwell yeah you know like you won't describe somebody with cancer as being crazy do you know what I mean like this was the most terrifying experience yes I've ever ever experienced I've ran into a hospital full of people the heavyweight champion of the world people know everybody knows me in the room I don't like asking them up to check my system because I think I've ever had a heart attack or I've been drugged seriously drugged because it nothing made sense it was so only rational yeah yeah erratic I didn't know what was going on and this all happened before you then had the incident where you considered driving into the bridge around about the same kind of time yeah but this is before actually before you've sought this is after that bridge I believe yeah yeah before you've gone to ask for help yeah yeah this is after that bridge moment and the doctors said sit down check me blood checked everything out monitors on EG whatever they are all over me he said you've not had a heart attack you're totally fine there's no drugs in your system but you need to calm down the heartbeat was going like 300 some a minute and he said you're gonna you don't count that you are gonna have a heart attack so whenever you give me these pills to take calm down you're totally fine and the doctor had doctor come in and spoke to me and he said like have you got a lot of stress going on in your life I said yeah this on the other loads of things going on at the time it was like I was supposed to be preparing for Vladimir let's go rematch imagine going in the ring with him after this while this is all going on they're trying to take me belts off me they want me to fight and I'm trying to barely survive to survive to live I've got my managers and all that yeah people around me trying to get me to go back fighting and I'm I'm trying to fight to breathe fresh area yeah and so I had a lot of stuff going on I had court cases going on people trying to sue me because I'm out the ring and I'm not fighting and the doctor said look prescribe me with these medications [Music] um and I've always been against like taking medication and stuff like my granddad was always on pills all his life and I don't think it helped him to be fair and anyway they give me this bag full of pills and anyway went back to the house and I said to me dad look I still wasn't I wasn't right I said I've someone's tried to kill me today I said someone is trying to kill me I said I've heard all voices in the radio my dad's like oh my God oh my God he's he's concentrating on what I'm saying but obviously he thinks scary for them as well he's scary for them yeah and we all sat downstairs in the front room on the floor this is our scam heavyweight champion for the world 27 years old and I'm sleeping downstairs in the house with me Dad and me brothers because I'm absolutely terrified I'd go to all the windows and doors and check them all bolt and everything and barricade all the door um why are you doing this like who are you afraid of who's coming he doesn't like thinking someone might be coming for him but he's in there when you're describing it like like the fact that you've repeated this out was the heavyweight champion of the world and you go that's the Gypsy King talking yeah you're actually a 27 year old seriously yeah so this time I'm still don't know what's going on like I think I'm having a heart attack a stroke I was in a severely very bad part of my life and the last thing on my mind was boxing or anything like that um and from then it was like I need to I need to see some doctors if they're gonna have I'm gonna have to go on medication I'm gonna have to do it whatever's gonna be the remedy for this I have to do hmm and I remember that like a few days had gone by and I felt back not 100 but I felt back like not Panic attacker node and I remember like saying parasol let's just book a little holiday away for the family me and you and the kids let's go away for a few days a week let's go to my favorite place south of France it's always been like a special place for me I remember going there and as soon as I got there it started again anxiety like mad was after two days and she's at this car up and we have to go I was dead against taking these pills but she was carrying them with her yeah and I was out two two nights two days I'd not slept I was like maybe like looking through the windows and stuff checking the doors and so scared and on that the third day of having no sleep I was so tired but I wouldn't go to sleep wouldn't it wouldn't let me switch I was praying to God I said please let me go to sleep please let me go to sleep two days two nights no sleeping just like constantly working man going all through the night I said to Paris give me them pills and I took these pills and I just went push out like I like and it felt like the best sleep ever and I'll win the next day we flew back and that was that was it that was when I went and got the I got some people to got meet them so tell us about what moment that surrender then when you've decided you've hit rock bottom and you know that you need you need help you can't do it on your own you're not Superman tell us about that moment when you go like what did you ask for I just wanted I just wanted knowledge I started researching on the internet outside watching videos I I spoke to some um quite a few people Dr psychiatrists all these people and like I said the first day one day with me darling Brothers and I think to myself this is not going to be for me that's telling this man all my problem me Dad's there listening to me as well and I'm I'm like why did you feel the need to go with them as opposed to going on your own I just felt like I didn't know what to expect and like they wasn't going to leave me it was just like this was a problem like something's going to happen with him I imagine how scared they was like having the responsibility of having this giant person who's very unwell and about to do some damage to himself right so I went there um that sort of explained it over a period of time that a normal person's life might be like this on a graph but your life is like this and anyway after speaking to him and going back and forth after the first day I was like I'm probably not going to go back there but by the time Friday it was coming I was like I can't wait to go back here now I'm looking forward to this it was like I was going on holiday or something and what was it that was happening in those meetings that that moved you to that it was just I suppose the education of what was going on and they explained to me what was happening and it was so refreshing to know that I wasn't on my own up there and this wasn't some disease that only I had yeah and that it was controllable because I thought I was only on my way to a padded room and nothing else ever was ever going to happen to me I thought I was gonna have a straight jacket on in a padded room somewhere and I was gonna go like cuckoo cuckoo that sort of feeling and I was terrified I'm not a barbarous or ashamed to say that I was more scared than a four-year-old girl um at these moments and it was the most terrifying frightening experience I've ever had in my life and I hope to God I never have to go back there and I'm not quite in a short I'm not quite any short I've got plenty of time same time I went um we seeked out the best psychologist in this country yep so we drove there made me Dad we weren't seen this lady um she had a big file of papers like that we spent like two hours in a room she was asking me questions taking Mark and all this sort of stuff um when it had finished she said oh that's done now Tyson can I have a world with you John and she said to me dad he's very high suicide risk and she said because he's got faith in God if he didn't have that he would have killed himself already and he needs watching at all times type of thing so can you imagine that and in that about a couple of days goes by and we got this like report back and everything to do all the tests I mean all sort of stuff and I come back with bipolar disorder um anxiety paranoia or there was a load of other things LCD uh was it good for you for the first time in your whole Clarity for someone to say this is what you've got this is it like these are going to be your medication forever type of thing I was thinking I also could think of was my Grandad who had to take these blue pills every day forever right I'm done thinking I'm [ __ ] [ __ ] here I don't know what's going to happen I'm gonna be drooling on the mouth in a rocking chair back and forward [Music] and anyway that wasn't the turning point for me this is gonna sound mud but after all it's even seen these doctors going and being assessed by the leading person in the country and downloading all the information in my mind and all that I suppose the turning point was this all are the big influence on the turning point I would say because after having this Clarity and understanding a bit more what was going on and knowing that there's a lot of people out there in this boat too this is an effect yeah so the turning point was I speak about it in my first book and I spoke about it very clear and very openly and I was out I went out after all this I still decided to go out because I wasn't right I still was very unwell and I went out for beers because believe it or not every time I'd had four or five pints I didn't have any problems there was no ailments I was I felt fine I didn't have any mental health didn't have depression and I wasn't anxious so I'm not feeling good I'm going to go out I'm going to have a few beers I'm gonna come back and get to bed how soon is this after this diagnosis in good this was like suppose a good one would have been earlier on um like late maybe September August September and when the Philippines late September and this night it was Halloween night 2017 right 31st of October I goes out here in Lancaster and as Yates says it was not yates's anymore and I went out dressed as a skeleton glow in the dark because I was embarrassed of people had a full face mask on as if people wasn't gonna know it was me seven foot guy walking around Morgan yeah I was embarrassed I wouldn't take my mask off I was drinking it through a mask there's beer and I looked around myself and I saw all these young people at the beginning of their life because Lancaster's a University Town and all these students all dressed up as as whatever they was fancy dress at this moment I only had this much off the top of a pint I've had this Moment of clarity and Sanity and everything was like so crystal clear to me I was like wow it's like I'd been asleep and I'd woke up and I said what the [ __ ] are you doing here with all these kids I've probably only been 28 myself at the time you've had the world in your arms you prick I just want thinking to myself I hope you don't mind swearing on this podcast I know you've chucked it all away to come and drink a beer in Yates as in Morecambe Lancaster go home right now this is I'm thinking myself in my mind put the panda bear down straight home comes in about nine o'clock Paris is thinking he's gonna go out all night and coming back type of thing so don't she said who's that said it's me went upstairs took my skeleton suit off I remember getting down on my knees praying to God I remember reading George Foreman's automography years ago oh yeah and he said in it like when he's his nephew got diagnosed ill with illness he got down on his knees and he prayed to God and it helped it worked so I thought I'm going to do that I've always been a believer in Christianity and stuff like I've always practiced it and always followed it and all that sort of stuff and any tiny time trouble would happen I'd always turn to God for help and I remember getting upstairs I was in The Underpants fat as [ __ ] 28 stone Plus and I remember calling out to God I was crying again I'm a proper crier um I could feel all my chest all wet and I felt like I was down there for an eternity but I probably wasn't I've probably only down there for like 10 minutes and I got up to me fee and I just felt like a Welter away I felt like I was 10 stone in weight I felt like the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders and for the first time in nearly three years I knew what I was gonna do and I called out to Paris like a child at Christmas Paris she said what tomorrow we start the regain mission and she wasn't she didn't believe me because I talked about this every time I had a few beers and I come back and be Heavyweight Championship because I wasn't unwell one had a few beers I was totally fine just drunk but obviously the boy who cried wolf a million times nobody believes it and the next day I'd get up and obviously not do it well this time I wasn't drunk and I meant it and I knew but all the obstacles in my life were about to be moved I remember saying to God I said please God I said if there's a way back to boxing for me I said this is where I want to be I want to come back to boxing if there's any possible way that you can bring me back to boxing that's what I want to be and at that time I had I was 10 nil down before kickoff I had a drug case going on where you cut which turned out to be a lot of [ __ ] is that the bullmate one yeah yeah I had I elevated levels and angelon in my system right another shot I also had suspension from the boxing border control RIT off by the top woman in the country absolutely disabled nearly what were those huh what were the what were they good enough they suspended me license my license was gone under mental health right right you couldn't legally fight in this situation it was done so our that the the case where you cut I had no license from the boxer border control I'm I'm deemed medically unfit by the leading woman in the country 28 stone in weight hearing voices in my mind still at that moment that time yeah and couldn't sleep at night without the lights on in the bedroom even then even then but I woke after that day after that moment I knew that all them obstacles were going to be moved gone and umpire said you can't box even if you wanted to even if he was 18 Stone right now he got box there's too much going on I said everything's gonna be all right don't worry I'm going to become World Heavyweight Champion again the next day I've got I even got the video on my phone and I'm going to show you in a minute yeah I'd love to see it the next day the video of what the video of the Turning Point can we well I'll show you in a minute yeah um I guess means right suit on and I was gonna go for a run down the canal near mine obviously I couldn't run I was too heavy I didn't know that at the time and I couldn't run half a mile so I started walking and I'm scrolling down Instagram as I was walking and I saw a video of Deontay Wilder saying I saw Tyson Fury recently and he's a mess he's a fat whatever and he's never coming back and it's such a travesty that this fight didn't happen I was thinking you know what mate I'm going back and I'm knocking you out and I remember calling Ben Davidson on that day because I worked with Ben earlier on before the panic attack for one of Billy Joe's fights in Spain and I called Ben and I said Ben I said I want you to train me and I'm going to come back and I'm going to get my license and I'm gonna think it's going to be all right and he was like you've got all this going on in your life like probably not a good time I said I promise you it's all gonna go away quite quickly and everything's gonna be all right and I'm going to get back and I'm going to get back boxing and I did yeah now can I ask you here because I'm I see your career in two parts the first part and then the second one two careers but you've described how on that first career you were obsessive about becoming the heavyweight champion of the world and you almost ignored all these mental health challenges and all the other stuff that eventually caused this crash so you've had this sense of Mission to get there and yet it's the same sense of mission that you now decide and he's going to lift you out of the dark place you're in yeah what were you doing differently on the second mission then that was going to avoid the same crash I felt like I had the experience and the know-how to overcome the challenges and this is gonna sound strange as if this fall interview wasn't already while I Was preparing to fight Safa Safari in Manchester he's back we'll get I've sort of skipped a little bit anyway the boxing border control before this they said to me right you want to come back great if you can get made medically fit Again by the same person he wrote you off before we'll give you a license but I was thinking never in a million years so I had to get all that the court case went away they decided it wasn't gonna fulfill it any longer and so overnight bang within a week no court case went sold psychiatrist person again and I was totally fine stamped approved the boxing border control revoked reinstated me license then I also needed to do was lose some weight sort of in a short space of time I'd gone from having no hope at all to being just fat and mentally unwell still and skipping forward again back to the Safa Safari fight like I was still very unwell but I knew I had a mission to do and I knew that the only way back to happiness for me was through training and unboxing and the more I trained the better I felt and every day that went by was I was going to get better and better and better and I'd have very good days and very very bad days and if you ever get Ben Davidson ask him and he'll tell you like one day I'd be great in the next three days I'd be down and I remember saying like we need to go over somewhere where it's got sunshine because Sunshine makes you feel happy and being in Morgan in the winter is sad and we said right Paris was pregnant with a alcoholic I don't know how many kids we've got like I think she was like fourth child Valencia and she was born on the 4th of December we'd been training in Morcom for about a month I'd say then obviously Paris was gonna have their baby and we said right as soon as she has the baby Christmas out the way will go to Spain training with a guy better son on us and that will help with the weight loss positivity everything so we had the baby three or four days later we're all in the car on the way to Spain Paris as well Paris as well with the baby full family is going I mean brother you he's coming with his new wife he made Matthew James's coming with his full family we meet Dave and he's full family we've got a right team all coming to support this this be a training company yeah lovely but I was still 26 Stone 10. because I've not lost that much weight I've had Christmas I've had [ __ ] I had a lot of weight to shift and we went over to Spain we got there on uh 27th of December and we started camp and I lost so much weight I lost like just under five Stone in a few months being over there but on the way there it was so hard because I wanted to quit so many times a sad phone them and say right polophy now boys let's just go to Disneyland I'll pay you for what you've done and at the same for me I don't want a box like I can't do this I knew what was coming the hard journey so why did you do that I had so why didn't you stop talking me into it like once you get there it's gonna be all right and you're going to train and everything's gonna be better again and it was a team effort a real team effort like I remember Ben saying to people like if I could just came to Spain we're gonna get there but whatever we got I must have found 10 times on the way there to say let's turn back I can't be bothered Boston as I saw the sunshine come up like I got down right to the south of Spain and started coming up the sunshine I was like I'm happy I found him up right we're gonna do this guys they're like oh my God this guy's lunatic so he gets there and every day I'm happy sad happy sad perseverance perseverance and I'm thinking right just gonna get through the day one day at a time one day at a time one day at a time I'm seeing the scale come down come down and the whole time I was I was training for that fight I was sleeping with the lights on still anxious [Music] medication was training at this moment right and eating well training drinking plenty of water and vitamins and all that and I started to feel better and better every day that went by I felt better and better and better um and it come I I think it was like the end of December until the 15th of June I'd lost all the weight I was back down to like 19 Stone odd and I was having my first fight back in Manchester um in 30 31 months or something like that it was a long long period of time and I remember thinking right this career is going to be so much different to before I'm going to enjoy it before it wasn't enjoyable like pre-clitschko it was wasn't an enjoyable career it was just so much pressure on me to deliver what I was saying become heavyweight champion of the world everyone's looking up to me wait to the world of my shoulders I'm carrying it for everybody and it was just so much pressure and it wasn't enjoyable it was it was horrible climb Elevate to the top yeah but for the second career I've got a new trainer who's Young I've got a new team everyone's on the same it's not like slug slugs like it's about being happy and everyone's laughing and it's so good and camps and stuff and I'm gonna take every moment in and I'm going to enjoy every single minute of it and I have done I have done it's almost like that first career was all about the outcome it was all about the Klitschko fight yeah it was all about scaling the mountain yeah and maybe you've now realized particularly after the journey you've been through and the things you've experienced that it isn't about the outcome it isn't about the destination it is about the process it's about the journey the journey this is it like this is what it's what life is us sitting here having this conversation this is all part of the journey is the best thing have you ever like been on a road trip on the way there it's fantastic when you get there you're there and you know you're coming back and on the way back it's terrible isn't it yeah all about the journey also who is more likely to get to the destination the person who loves the journey and loves what they're doing or the person who's only fixated on that moment in the distance of course the person that loves the journey completes the journey don't know I have to disagree do you think because I think something's only achievable if you've got a destination Target like if you're just going along for the Bulls are like oh whatever happens happens in your life I think it's very hard to hit something the dangerous if you don't you did get the target you got the Klitschko fight yeah the risk is if you for someone that doesn't get what they want to get if they also don't enjoy the journey and the view isn't worth the climb like what are you left with then well the way I like to explain this is if you know what you want in your life first of all right you've got to figure out what you want if you know what you want no matter how far you are away from this target eventually you're going to hit this target or you're going to get very close to it if I've got a gun and I'm trying to shoot a Target it's a mile away and I'm sniperating and I'm miles off but I keep shooting towards that Target bang bang bang bang bang eventually ping I'm gonna wit it but imagine I'm just shooting over there I'm shooting nothing what am I gonna ever eat [ __ ] off so you got you gotta have a Target so what's your Target now my Target now is to enjoy every every single day that comes like I don't have a Target anymore like I've done everything I wanted to do in my life times a million and does that worry you because that was part of the source of your mental health struggles yeah so now I'm fixated I'm fascinated on taking one day at a time and living every moment because I know once I walk out of that door This Moment's gone forever located back on the TV but like we lived here today yeah and we enjoyed it and this was our time and I've actually grew an obsession with time gone absolutely obsessed with time and owning it and living it and and being very very very In This Moment because I know I've lived a lot of my life focusing on a future event and I know I've missed out on a lot of stuff that was happening that was a reality that I had no interest in I didn't pay any attention to because I was only fascinated fixated on Klitschko and beating him become an heavyweight champion since then it's all about living in this moment for the journey yeah and being in being here right now I'm not thinking about going to the gym in a bit I'm not thinking about what's going to happen next week or going on holiday next year or Christmas I'm thinking about what I'm doing right now and I'm enjoying it and that's how I live my life now short-term goals being present is being present for sure short-term goals no matter what it is how small they are or how big they are so how do you set your day up now then talk us through a typical day now for Tyson so I have a very structured routine life and I find that works for me being a mental health patient and one I've got nothing to do no targets no short-term goals no nothing it's like pissing in the wind for me it's a disastrous moment so I know every single day I'm getting up at six o'clock in the morning I'm gonna get showered and messed around do all that sort of stuff I'm getting the kids apart of bed I'm taking them to school I'm going to feed the dog take him for a walk and after the school I'm gonna go for a run and the Promenade three or four mile I'm gonna come back I'm gonna have some breakfast I'm gonna do me daily jobs whether it's taking the bins or paying some bills or tidying up and doing some weeding whatever I'm doing and then I'm going to pick the kids up from school and then I'm going to go to the gym at four o'clock I'm going to train for maybe an hour and a half two hours come back shower up get me tea relax get to bed early nine o'clock half nine I'm out cold that's every day and then weekends I'll do the training alternate trainings and stuff like that on the the other days it's Tuesday Wednesday but it's very routine mundane lifestyle and on the weekend Saturday I'll do a nice long run in the morning six mile or maybe a hill run or something and I'll I'll take the family out of something to eat or whatever and then Sunday is a horrible day for me like I have no routine on a Sunday you know it's me day off of eating writing all up so I can basically eat what I want and we like to go out for a Sunday dinner or or go to church but after that after that one o'clock ish two o'clock time it's very boring for me and I cannot wait to get back to that Millstone on Monday morning I mean Dad says to me the other day he's like after everything you've achieved in your life and everything you could do in your life and how hard you've worked the only thing you like to do is stay here in morecam and train train train train train and do the same thing every day I said yes that's exactly what I love to do because it makes you happy because it makes me happy and you know when I have to go out of my comfort zone like going going somewhere or doing a tour or going going away from Morgan it takes me out of my routine me training twice a day be eating the same things go in the same places I'm like um The Truman Show everything's the same I'm being filmed at the moment by Netflix for a 10 part 10 series docue series with my old friend Demi Doyle yeah Dave for our first job and Telly you know a long time ago did you yeah yeah it's great [Music] and these people are like this man lives very basic hold on a minute they've paid all this money for a dog series they're thinking yeah where's where's the story this is the money in your account here before you even be with us however hey guys we're doing the same as yesterday it's like they're gonna film me in the gym they're going to film me on a run they're gonna film me taking the kids to school walking the dog but it's interesting for these because I think the viewing people I was going to watch this I think in like oh the World Heavyweight Champion is famous boxer who everybody knows everywhere he goes must be living this big luxurious life and and all of a sudden they see me picking up dog [ __ ] and taking the bins up and down and messing around doing all these things and living this very very normal life um it's got to be an experience but again I I live a very basic routine life because I know what the other side's like so I know if I have feel at stake every day and go out for cocktails how long is that going to last before I'm absolutely sick and suicidal of it yeah people say oh if I want the lottery I do this and do that but they don't think of the consequences that it's all gonna take the effect is coming off on the individual and the effects are shocking how long can you go on a holiday for an all-inclusive holiday until you're absolutely sick of looking at it me two days and I can't wait to get out of there well some people might be able to do it for a week two weeks even but imagine a bit and having nothing to do in your life and just doing that every single day like I have to live routined it brings happiness and I don't know how long my body will be able to pull up with a wear and tear like I sit here today as a battered person to bits and operation elbows I mean joints are wore out with all the training over the years and a heavyweight battering the roads and punching things to pieces and all the fights I've had on all the sparring on all the camps and everything but I know that I have to continue I have to continue because the day I stopped training the day I die see but that's where for me like there's warning lights here Tyson that like because you've been around it like I have you've seen loads and lots that have said um when I get out that's me doing I'm never gonna look back I've just experienced it and how many do you get that then get tempted when the you know when the when the spotlight moves to somebody else when the the circus moves to a new town and you're there then in that routine Netflix or not filming you you're stuck in that routine and you're thinking I could do one more fight I've got one more person taking me on how are you going to avoid that well I I've obviously failed drastically because I retired back in April and I would have passed any polygraph test in the world any lie detector I wholeheartedly meant it so this wasn't another Gypsy King no stunt this was a genuine this was genuine hand on heart swear to God in Jesus name I meant retirement I did not want a box I in fact I don't want a box now I'm going to get to that in a minute I did not want to fight on anymore like I wanted to retire after a while to three like coming out of that ring and feeling like I was gonna have a brain injury had lumps on the side of my head like Fists memory loss you had didn't you memory loss can't remember anything didn't know how many times I've been down didn't know and that was the first time that's happened yeah didn't know where I was yeah that's a warning sign not to ignore isn't it I was in Vegas I didn't know what hotel I was in didn't know where I was staying nothing and then I said to parents like this is it babe no more and I won't put you through this I'm looking outside the ring I'm my wife's looks like she's gonna have an heart attack my brothers are like you know just everyone's terrified like going on the floor getting up all these things getting battered to [ __ ] you just never know what's going to happen yeah and I said like that's it now she said thank God for that I'm very very happy that this is done and I meant it then as well and I got back home and I thought to myself like after a week of of contemplateness then it's in case I gotta fight again Paris she said why I said because I owe it to the fans in the UK to fight back home I've been away since 2018. all these people have traveled to Las Vegas and watched a pay-per-view five o'clock in the morning wouldn't it be nice I said to have one more fight back at home and give everybody an opportunity to come and see it live one more time she said if this is going to be the last one I said I promise you maybe this is the last one no more so I called it Frank Frank Warren is as a Frank uh I know you're going to wake me for this but like I want to fight again so anyway we sort out a deal with the uh the mandatory Dylan white and anyway it went on to be the biggest biggest boxing event in in history this country 94 000 people and that was it farewell goodbye forever Adele this is the end the punch that finished that fight it was with two spinning out on it but 94 000 at Wembley it was an epic moment to go why not stop then well this I'm going to get to that now but can I just jump in cool like I don't believe yeah with our due respect when you tell me about the about I want to do it for the fans well like why would you care do you know what I mean these are the same fans that like in your world you've got to tie it in a circle who you listen to you have to yeah the fans are nice and it's nice to play the game of engaging with the fans and things like that but that's that wasn't the real reason I'm struggling to 100 the reason there is no other reason why though and then come back for money because I made a lot of money out of that trilogy but why would you care about the fan Center because when you go out that door and walk down the street with me and you've got people crying their eyes out suffering with mental health problems and all this stuff that's going on right and they look at me like a hero I'm a Shining Light to them and like I say these people spend hard earn money traveling across the Atlantic Ocean to Las Vegas I'm waiting up all night to see me fight in America why not owe it to the fans and give them what they want one last time why don't you let them just come in for free then and do it that way because I would do that I've offered to fight Joshua for free and I swear to God in Jesus name I'll do it but you've got promoters and everybody else around you that are not willing to do that so that's why however that that is the only reason I came back people in my mind at that time that was it like 100 billion percent I was happy I vacated my ring magazine belt I was 100 certainly I I text Mauricio suleim on the head of the WBC he must think I'm a raver because he must have eight messages from me retirement messages for the WBC vacating it they're starting the other like I had no intention of ever fighting again shh so here's what happened why am I back so I thought myself I've been away a long time and missed a lot of my kids growing up I thought I'm going to spend time with my kids I'm going to be happy with driving around more come I'm going to be very happy going to me gym doing a bit of training and I just want to live a normal life I just want to be left alone and that lasted I'd say for about two months and then I started thinking I need boxing I need that fight I'm going to the gym twice a day training anyway running in the morning boxing at night and waits the next morning box that night trying to keep my weight down trying to keep positive and how long are that are you gonna do before you're ready to fight again I'm seeing Joseph Parker in my gym fight camps everyone's gearing up for big fights and it's like I have an addiction I've got addictive personality and I'm clearly addicted to boxing and I can't let it go and I always said to myself like how do these greats come back and end up losing five six ten fights at the end of the career why didn't you just walk away now I know why because you can't walk away you know the cost though the physical and I know the physical risks and all the costs I know everything however I can't live alone I'm addicted to fighting and it's not even about anything now it's not about titles it's not about achievements it's not about goals money thank God I've worked hard enough and I'm in a position where money is not an object anymore but I must be sick in the mind because I love getting punched I love punching but that's where the damage is it's in like the sparring where this memory loss isn't that fight with wild that that memory loss is in the camps over the years where you've been taking shots and things like that so that's the cumulative effect you know it yeah so like the image I have I know in your heart that you should walk away 100 I know that I shouldn't be boxing I should walk away because the image I've got in my head is is Muhammad Ali fighting Larry Helms when he's taking diet pills and and it was tragic wasn't it oh Trevor burbick in that car park in Bermuda well you know what that last fight yeah so a couple of questions for you how do you reconcile that eventually father time is going to beat you it won't be an opponent and and why don't you use a common sense no no mystery no no but not common sense but I'm asking you why don't you use the same methods that you did to get over your mental health challenges that you're still doing I've tried to help with the addiction to boxing I can't let it won't go away from me no matter I can sit here today and say I don't want a box boxing like actual fights competitiveness against an opponent is it that is it the actual addiction to the boxing game actual being involved myself because I've been around it yeah for years and and helping out with coaching but that doesn't give me the same effect I don't think there's any any drug or alcohol or anything in the world that can give you the same effect as going one-on-one with another trained athlete and it's the feeling of scared happy sad frightened anxiety everything rolled in one so how powerful is that compared to how you felt that day when you thinking I'm gonna drive into a bridge like like give us a comparison of the addiction you're describing for boxing compared to when you're in that dark hole of not being able to see a way out yeah that that dark place not being able to see a way out is is a horrible terrifying place to be but how powerful is it compared to this the diction you describe this addiction to boxing is I would say is equally as powerful as well the dark deep holes on him with mental health right and it must be how addictive is it well I'm sitting here today saying I've got everything to lose and nothing to gain including my mind I mean brain damage and whatever else could happen to me I'm actually saying that I know I shouldn't be fighting anymore but I'm still fighting and I still want to fight so how powerful is it incredibly I like and I've tried to walk away 20 times yeah and wholeheartedly meant it but what have you done but what steps have you taken because you eventually surrendered you went to a psychiatrist you you told people I need help here and you found it you know what I mean so you actually took some tangible steps to do that and I'm interested to say I need to replace this addicts with something else I mean I I'll to identify a new purpose a new sense of mission of you know what I can normalize mental health here and I can become a spokesman for that I can train your boxers I can like like you could do so many amazing outside of a boxing ring I'm always talking about mental health anyway the journey is the mental health Journey from where I've been to where I am today and it's all been well documented and well there's a lot of evidence out there back in it all um that'll always be there um and it's just what steps have I taken I've literally tried everything I've talked up golf I've talked up clay pigeon shooting I've took up four-wheel driving I've took up buying and selling properties I I I'm addicted to buying and selling cars I've always done it all my life the problem is though I you know I I get the sense you're trying to replace the thrill with another thrill it's almost like you have to take steps to accept you have to live without the thrill yeah and how it's all started it's like all right I don't want a box because I know the consequences yeah well then all right I'll do some exhibitions but it's all just leading back to the fight game you know what I mean I just I've literally tried everything I've vacated my belts I told the promoters please leave me alone I don't want to fight anymore and then the next day I'm like no I want to fight no I don't yes I do no don't yes I do but I know that I need this and I'm going to get to that why I went to Iceland recently a few months ago before the Joshua rousek fight uh all for a bit of banter with the film crew and to call out Thor and have a big old bit of a scrap in the ring and all that sort of stuff with with the Game of Thrones guy I'm always over there I really realized that that was when we Darden with me makes Pence and I felt like I do not want to be involved in boxing like this is it so I phoned up Mauricio Suleiman sent him a nice message and he facetimed me and he said Chuck my dear champion this is fantastic you're going out on top as a champion I I um support anything you want to do and I officially retired I vacated the Ring magazine Bell I officially vacated a WBC belt the next thing I normally I mean I'm in the pub having a beer um sees it all come across the TV screens in Iceland heavyweight champion of the world retires everyone's congratulating me I don't think what the [ __ ] I've just done I felt the emptiness of being mentally unwell again I felt down I felt depressed this is not the beat I only had one beer at this moment and even before even went to the pub I was sat outside on a bench with my dad and Ben's thinking like finally now this is it and I was down again I was already depressed I was depressed straight what is the Klitschko moment Mark II then isn't it you scaled that mountain and saw The Emptiness on the other side yeah on it on here I am retiring again and you see the emptiness and there it is empty and Hollow again I'm sat there thinking what now and I come back home and I was home for two weeks and every day that that came that two weeks I was down and it was a gray day and I couldn't shake it and I was going to the gym I was lifting weights I was doing a run and it wasn't it wasn't doing anything for me for the first time in years and then as soon as I made up my mind I'm gonna come back and fight USAC or Joshua I feel great again so you're a boxing connoisseur yeah two names for you then Marciano and Hagler yeah two fighters that when they've got out never came back have you studied them have you explored how they did it I'm not gonna sit here and lie how did they do it I haven't I know Hagler was very pissed off with the result of um him and her uh Leonard and he had a bad taste in his mouth about boxing he didn't want to be around it because he thought he was cheated so he walked away yeah feeling terrible about it all but remember that did a book on him where we where we wrote about him and he eventually went gave himself a new challenge like I think the issue here is you can't compare any other boxer to this story because no other books are has been so low so sad so painful exactly it's pretty different it's a different story it was interesting this isn't about what he what he did did he accept no but so I'm not comparing it what I'm saying is these are people that have had an addiction to you like you've had that they've had they've been addicted to the pain in the spotlight the training and yet they still got out and never came back that's the key why I mentioned them so hugler went to give himself a new challenge so we moved to Milan where he didn't speak the language he pursued a career in films for a while that gave him that it was almost like the methadone treatment you know of like he was still in the spotlight but he was having to learn lots of other new challenges to do that you know Marciano did something similar in terms of pursued a career still in the spotlight but without having to do the hard yards of the training and the cumulative effects of the damage that was done then 100 percent but again they probably wasn't mentally unwell was I I think you're less addicted to boxing and more you can't allow yourself to go where you were when you were sitting in your sports car that day or when you were in that's that's a scary moment that I think I think that's what's happening here and the only way that you will ever be able to walk away from boxing is if you can be mentally happy not being a boxer if you know we spoke at the very start of this conversation yeah Tyson Fury is this person the Gypsy King is the is the guy in the in the boxing ring I think we've probably ended it by realizing that to the public they're two people for you they're exactly the same person and you have to be able to remove the Gypsy King from your life yeah to let him go forever let him go forever and just and to realize that Tyson Fury is not weak because he had mental health problems he's strong because he got through them he's not lacking focus in his life because he's got numerous children and a wife that loves him yeah he isn't lacking support because he's got an amazing Network around him and he still mates with the people he was at school with somehow you've got to realize that you are way stronger than you are weaker and the fact you've been through a mental health struggle shows how strong you are and if you can get there yeah I think you can sit on the sofa with Paris you can watch someone else have a world heavyweight fight and you can smile knowing that very few people have walked on this Earth and Achieve what you've achieved that's very very good assessment of it and if I could do that that'd be like fantastic you might be able to though don't think you can't look what you've done with your life you understand all that but what made me better and well again was this what I'm doing today and all the time that I wasn't doing this I was sad and I sit here today I'm fitting healthy and everything's great I still love my days the Hotel California song you can check out anytime you want but you can never leave can I ever leave we can check out get well okay you're gonna come back and see in in a bit mush he'll be back and I face this all the time and every time I walk away from boxing back in the hotel California and I'm really afraid yeah of what's coming you know like you watch Game of Thrones The Winter's come in the Darkness that's me sat here today and everything's great I want my dog go to the gym I used to having treatment I used to sing psychiatrists no no I'm not saying anybody but odd days I feel up and down but most days like I say I've got this little method I do short-term goals set myself a weight Target make sure I bet you there's a person on this Earth if you went and found them that could work with you and solve this problem in exactly the same way that you couldn't be a professional boxer for 20 years without a coach you need to find the coach for the next part of your life and they are there 100 this help out there like I said I just got to take it out like I did before and you say keep busy with other stuff and the most busiest person on the planet at the moment I've signed up to like 60 tour dates from now in the country I've had to cancel like the 20 of them because I'm supposed to be going back into camp I'm singing a song I'm writing my third book I'm doing a 10 part not that Netflix documentary with an option to do another two seasons if I want to how much stuff can I do to keep busy but there's busyness but look at again as I'm listening to it that you're the economic engine for lots of other people that are not gonna say to you they'll get on the ad look after yourself I'm worried about you in 20 years time not you in two years how many people are around you that right that actually would go against their own economic advantage and say to you just go and live a happy life we'll find a way we're good like go and get that treatment that is going to help you uncouple the Gypsy King concise and Fury versus go and do that documentary come on I'm going to promote you on the tour I've got a new book for you to sell yeah that it sounds to me like I've seen it like you know in terms of growing up in that world yeah I always think that on your way up nobody wants to know you then you hit a peak level of Fame and then everybody wants to know you and on your way down nobody wants to know you ever nobody wants to know you again so at the minute you're at that stage where everyone wants to know you because there's a there's an advantage to knowing you but there's nobody else here saying to it but will those same people want to know you in 25 years it'll be Paris and it'll be the people around you 100 are actually saying to you like he said before I don't have a big crew of people I have the same people today around me die hard when I first started boxing right and what are they saying my wife me Brothers right and they'll still be there in 20 years time of No Doubt except what are they saying to you they said to me forget about boxing walk away right you've done what you've done you don't need anything else now get out of it and it's it's mainly just me and it's my mood changes and and changing my mind every two minutes I'm in very indecisive sure but there's lots of incentives of people then that when you change it a lot of people have said just walk away retire no no but there's a there's also that other siren call on your other shoulder people go in stay in it because you're relevant at the minute yeah Netflix are not coming to you when you're long retired then you've not got that title do you see what I mean of course yeah while while the hot they're trying to get everything in aren't they yeah but no you've made a very valid point like five years they're the people you've got to listen to them in Huddersfield again I'm hearing it and I'm seeing the same stream of people walking in saying knock his [ __ ] head off so I said rather than listen to your coaches stick to the game plan get behind the Jab keep slipping it's people walking in that have an opinion rather than empathy there's always been no like I don't think I can retire today because I need that Joshua fight we have been trying to make that fight for years right why do you need that fight because it's like it's the fight that people want to see it's the fact that I want to see but then they'll be oh I need Joshua too because I the result he wasn't happy with or I wasn't happy with it I just fear they'll always be an Anthony I've already said that the law like the Roman general said and we'll beat everybody now he said yep there'll always be somebody else in the beginning of the Gladiator movie yeah remember it yeah yeah Ray guys we've conquered the world and he goes there'll always be somebody else to fight there'll always be another War yeah and there's it's going to be somebody else like before the last four or five years there's been this three-headed monster me Wilder Joshua Joshua and Wilder have been slain and I'm the last one standing all of a sudden you've got some new people coming up now you've got Joe Joyce coming Daniel Dubois usex gatecruster party so now there's loads of new blood that wasn't there five years ago and it's like well can you meet this person can you beat that person but I think it would be an absolute day in travesty if me and Joshua didn't fight in this era we've already seen big heavyweights that didn't fight before like Mike Tyson versus Riddick Beau Mike Lennox Lewis and Bo um we didn't see the junior winter Ricky Hutton fight we didn't see Carl frotch versus uh Joe Carl zaggy there's been so many good fights that we didn't get to see and lock him back and I'm now like does anyone really care that you didn't see him but it seems so important to me now living in the moment but lot we're pretty much out of time but what I would say is for you to come and talk like this and share this with us um in the way you have we'll do so much for people that are struggling in a real place where you were and what I would finally say is we're both boxing fans right there's nothing on the earth that we would love to see more than Tyson Fury Auntie Joshua but above all of that there's nothing I'd like to see more than that than at the end of that fight I read somewhere that you found the serenity to walk away from boxing so you know please speak to people look for those answers they're not within you and they're probably not within the immediate circle around you right they are almost certainly the answer to your problem is with someone you've never met in your life so it's time to open the door and see who's outside I think so well boys it's been a fascinating very uh interesting how was it for you it's been good you know it's been up and down round and round the round it's been a typical Tyson Fury moment I believe but like I say things like this like you've just said there they will people will watch us people who are probably well and whatever they can take from it positive might help them and our life might just save someone's life I I've watched this you you guys before and you you always say like what three things your three non-negotiable behaviors that you and the people around you have to buy into well my free non-negotiable behaviors or three things that makes me high performances fish fingers chips and beans and that we've never had before come on let's explain that fish fingers chips and beans it's me deferral meal and that's what makes me high performance no more explanation I have it before everybody and that's what makes me high performance is that what you had even when he was a kid for your first amateur fight that's my favorite favorite favorite meal in the world you can go to all the big fancy restaurants in the world have you ever asked for it in a big fancy restaurant of course obviously so what was the first time you asked it in a Posh Restaurant when you thought that's heavyweight champion of the world status when they did it without I was in America in a big fancy restaurant in New York yeah and everyone was having lobsters and all this fancy truffle and whatever else all these fancy fish things I don't even like any of this like seafood and all that I'm not a seafood person so I said oh I know she said well what what can we meet you got a chef would make anything you want like I said I'll tell you what I'll have fish fingers chips and beans and a bit like beans like green beans I'm like no um like breakfast beans and she's like what is this because I don't have beans for breakfast today in America in Spains yeah and uh so I got a picture up and she's like oh like barbecue beans because they haven't were like barbecue and stuff like yep that's what I want fish fingers not crisps I want like chunky fries yeah and barbecue beans barbecue beans no that's power I don't know about that people are looking at me like this guy's crazy can we go for a little quick right um what advice would you give to a teenage Tyson just starting out be prepared for a whirlwind of a roller coaster life coming home what is your biggest strength what is your greatest weakness my biggest strength is my ability to overcome problems and my biggest weakness is not knowing what to do when it's when I should if you could go back to one moment of your life what would it be or why One Moment In My Life go back it would probably be the moment that me in Paris had beneath the trees in 2006 we're having a picnic I wasn't amateur boxer and I told her I was going to marry her after going out with her for about three months and I told her I was going to be every title I ever won I named it more off and I told her that I was going to marry him we're going to have kids and I'm going to be heavy at jump into the world and it was one of those epic moments in my life that I would relive it I love that and finally this is your kind of departing message really for the people that have listened to this podcast um what you'd love to leave them thinking about and it's your one Golden Rule to living a high performance life the golden rule for me would be a Folly heart follow your dreams because you never know where it might take you I'll never listen to all the naysayers and all the dream Crushers because along the journey that I've had I've had so many people telling me that I can't do this and won't do that and will won't be possible and I didn't believe any of them and I made it to the top anyway so if you follow your dream and you've got a goal probably gonna reach it thank you so much for your time today I really hope you enjoyed this episode of high performance if you can just do one thing before you go I would love you to subscribe to our Channel you know almost 80 percent of the people that come on here and watch our videos don't subscribe and the more subscribers we get the bigger our Channel becomes the bigger the channel becomes the bigger the guests become the bigger the guests and the more amazing things they've done and the more it impacts your life because we can have incredible conversations with the most remarkable people so if you can spare me just seconds right now I would love you just to subscribe to high performance thanks so much and keep coming back for more good stuff from our Channel

Channel: High Performance

Views: 783,123

Keywords: Podcast, The High Performance Podcast, Jake Humphrey, Damian Hughes, Liquid thinker, Tyson Fury, The Gypsy King, The Gypsy King Podcast, Tyson Fury Podcast, Tommy Fury Podcast, Fury Family Podcat, Tyson Fury Boxing, Boxing, Boxer, Tyson Fury Press Confrence, world heavyweight champion, heavyweight boxing, tyson fury returns, deontay wilder, derek chisora, anthonyjoshua, joshua fury, chisora fury, usyk fury, Tyson Fury Fight, The BBC Guy, High Performance, Performance Boxer

Id: rQHVe9ogasg

Length: 104min 32sec (6272 seconds)

Published: Mon Nov 14 2022