Top 5 Tips for Providing Emotional Support to Pregnant or Expecting Mothers

hello my name is Samantha Mont Alegre and welcome to the maternity mentor today we are going to be talking about the top five things dads or partners can do in the first trimester to emotionally support their partner [Music] [Music] thanks for joining us today's topic is the top five things dad's or partners can do in the first trimester to emotionally support their partner for anyone who doesn't know me I have been a registered nurse since 2009 I've spent my entire career working in the maternal newborn nursing area including mother baby postpartum NICU antepartum and labor and delivery I have practices in IBCLC since 2012 and have been maternal newborn nursing certified since 2013 I have also received specialized training in perinatal mood and anxiety disorders as well as perinatal bereavement the first trimester is an exciting time this is often felt by new parents and experienced parents alike once the positive pregnancy test has happened there are many things you can do to prepare for your role as dad or partner in this video we will explore the top five things dads or partners can do in the first trimester to emotionally support their partners if you stay until the end of the video we will also give you a bonus suggestion as well I would like to take a moment to acknowledge that families look very different all over the world I am aware that not all supportive partners are husbands or dad's partners can be sisters mother's cousins friends wives boyfriends girlfriends grandparents partners include any gender or any role that makes up your family unit we may refer to dad throughout this video this is not intended to exclude other partners it is simply for the ease of speaking and presenting the information whatever your role is this information applies to you as well let's start with your baby's development it helps to connect you with your baby and your partner's pregnancy if you know more about what is happening and how your baby is developing during the first trimester your baby is growing and changing in amazing ways the first trimester starts at the moment of conception and ends on the sixth day of the 13th week your baby starts as a fertilized egg that implants itself in the uterus and begins to transform rapidly in the first few weeks the baby's heart can usually be seen by week 7 during a vaginal ultrasound face hands feet arms and legs develop by week 9 by week 11 your baby already has fingernails and is moving around inside its mother your baby even starts to pee at the end of this trimester now let's talk about how your pregnant partner feels your pregnant partner has a lot going on during the first trimester her body has to rapidly adjust to growing a new baby and that causes a lot of changes some changes which might be expected and some which might be surprising common first trimester physical symptoms include extreme fatigue nausea and vomiting painful or tender breasts bloating food aversions and frequent urination emotionally she can be all over the place with irritability joy sadness and even fear the most important thing for you to understand is that these changes can be overwhelming lots of support and patience are needed in order to help your partner adjust to her new role now here is our list of the top five things dads or partners can do in the first trimester to emotionally support their partner please remember these are in no particular order you may have been trying to get pregnant or this may have been a complete surprise either way your partner is probably feeling a little overwhelmed and she will be looking to you for your reaction you may also be feeling a little overwhelmed feeling overwhelmed and even scared is normal however it's extremely important for you to celebrate this moment with your partner this is a time to come together and solidify your base as a couple enjoy the moment the worries and the plans can come later remember to celebrate the way she wants to meaning let her make the plans it's not because your input is not important it is let her decide because she may already not be feeling well due to the pregnancy and the certain activities may not actually be celebratory for her and instead be sickening once your little one arrives life will change forever this does not mean you will never enjoy a night out alone with your partner again but there will be logistics to deal with including babysitters budgets and the occasional illness that makes it a little more challenging to accomplish take this time now to enjoy some nights out on the town our activities not conducive to bringing an infant or toddler be patient with your partner she may initially agree and then back out at the last minute due to illness understand a lot is going on with her right now plan some nights in as well all of this will show her how close you feel to her and strengthen the bond and relationship you both enjoy mood swings are very real part of the first trimester women are often overwhelmed by the flood of emotions they feel during this time emotions can often change from minute to minute the most important thing you can do is stay calm and don't take anything too personally and keep your sense of humor about everything that's going on make her laugh but don't laugh at her that will definitely backfire be close remind her that you were there for remember she may not want you to be close physically keep in mind she may be a key or nauseous or just plain tired from lack of sleep however if she wants you close offer to rub her back her feet hug her and kiss her show her your love often reinforce the bonds of your relationship with compliments and trips down memory lane listen to her and let her know that you're here for the good the bad and the ugly including letting her throw up in front of you even go so far as to hold her hair while it's happening these actions and words will speak volumes to her even when she does not always say it and this is one of the best ways to help her cope with the myriad of feelings and moods she may be experiencing finally be ready to compromise ask yourself if what's going on or the illogical stance she may be taking is really worth an argument she may just as quickly change her mind and agree with you soon enough compromise can be key during this tumultuous time once you find out your partner is pregnant she is not the only one who needs to visit the doctor schedule yourself for a physical if you are due you can't support your partner or your baby if you are unwell yourself make sure you're in good health and update your vaccines newborns are susceptible to infection and contracting the flu or pertussis can be very serious or even deadly to your baby so get vaccinated in addition to your physical health start seeking out emotional support talk with your friends who have already had babies find out their tips and tricks and what keeps them sane here their war stories it's important for you to realize that you are not alone remember to take everything you hear with a grain of salt fatherhood is a very rewarding experience and you will serve a very important role in your child's life your journey will be different than every single one of your friends journeys however you're joining a very special Club so embrace it finally make sure you're getting enough quality sleep and enjoy some of your favorite hobbies now while you have a little extra time even go out with your friends if your partner is supportive pretty soon you will be very busy with your little one your partner will need to be going to the doctor on a regular basis this can be a chore to say the least especially in the first trimester so going with her can show your support and be a big help there may be many occasions we're driving to the appointment itself can be exhausting or impossible due to nausea additionally the first appointment is special because the doctor may perform a vaginal ultrasound and you will be able to see your baby around 12 weeks you will be able to start hearing the baby's heartbeat at the appointments and at around 20 weeks a comprehensive ultrasound will be performed where you can see different parts of your growing baby attending appointments also allows you to meet your partner's healthcare provider you can ask questions and help your partner remember the questions she has please note you may not always be as comfortable with her provider as she is giving birth is a very intimate experience and she is the boss in this area she needs to have full confidence in her provider and their ability to respect and take care of her often women have been with their provider for years before pregnancy for well women checks meaning their relationship is well established and full of trust your job is to support her decision on a provider and respect their relationship ask your partner about preferences when it comes to you attending appointments she may want you at every appointment or only a few appointments can come with different procedures like vaginal ultrasound and she may feel more comfortable with you there or she may not want you there at all let her know how you feel too if you want more or less presence at the appointments talk with her and explain why you feel the way you do together as a couple you can make a decision that works best for both of you finally you should be aware that you are entitled to time off to attend at least two prenatal visits with your partner by law most employers will be supportive of this but you can provide them with the information if necessary time off does not mean paid time off if your financial situation does not support you going to every prenatal visit try to hit the big ones like the 20-week ultrasound and help your partner out by finding rides and support persons to take your place if she desires this help thanks so much for sticking with us here's the bonus item we promised you when to tell people you are pregnant this is a very personal choice and many new parents struggle when to tell others of the pregnancy some choose to tell everyone right away some choose to tell no one and some are somewhere in the middle an estimated 1 in 8 pregnancies end in miscarriage many times the cause of this is unknown 75% of these miscarriages will occur in the first trimester providers will perform genetic blood test screenings and ultrasounds in the first trimester to help rule out certain conditions so talk with your partner figure out where you both stand on telling people and make a time frame for telling people together there's no right or wrong way to do this just be flexible one or both of you may change your mind as the days or weeks go on that's okay while you're waiting to tell people get imaginative there's tons of ideas on the Internet of creative fun announcements you can choose when you are ready to tell people once you find out your partner is pregnant there are many things you can do to support your partner and get yourself off to a great start towards Parenthood taking these steps can help you feel better both mentally and physically mental and physical health goes a long way to a healthy and fulfilling pregnancy journey and a healthy relationship with your partner we hope this video has helped you find what is right for you please share your comments and let us know what topics you would like to hear more about if you like this content please remember to hit that like button and subscribe so you can be the first to receive this information remember to share this channel with your friends and family and follow us on Facebook Instagram and Twitter for additional content we will link those in the description below thank you so much for joining us at the maternity mentor

Channel: The Maternity Mentor

Views: 25,437

Keywords: Antepartum, Baby, Becoming a Mother, Birth, Birth Support, Breastfeeding, Child Bearing, Child Birth, Doula, Expecting, Family Support, First Baby, Formula Feeding, Gestation, High Risk Pregnancy, Labor, Labor & Delivery, Labor and Delivery, Labor Support, Lactation, Maternal Support, Maternity, Mental Health, Midwife, Neonatal, NICU, NICU Baby, OBGYN, Obstetrician, Paternal Support, Perinatal Education, Perinatal Mood Disorders, Postpartum Anxiety, Postpartum Depression, Pregnancy, Pregnant

Id: SN7GjYfLHzM

Length: 14min 37sec (877 seconds)

Published: Sun Jun 21 2020