Tim Minchin So Live - Part 1

so if you gave expecting a burlesque show with girls and nipple tassels and a flying trapeze sorry but I'm gonna have to disappoint you you should read your program not dancing with you interpretation the story sorry buddy disappointed you made an error during the booking process but if you can't see me in the valley is it water if you wanna read Chicago maybe have some savings when your god am i walking wrong I work very hard for my rock'n'roll hair I get it chemically straight and then I started four hours I went very hard for October all face I've got the cookie on hand lenses and the girl Apsara but Claire is something inside stopping about this mask right well I I made lots of money ball this big piano and the fancy fancy likes to make me look like Michael Jackson I made lots of money for this bohemian Cove and the fact I don't wear shoes is just an affectation there is something because I found this costume something probably and I I found Oh Oh on you all so Rock I am so goddamn Rock I am so Rock don't get any water rock rock rock it lays it all the ladies in the house come on and let me hear you say hey all the fellas in the house come on and let me hear you say all the ladies in the house come on let me hear you say I'm not good with maps but I have a highly developed emotional intelligence this is a love song your love for me is not debatable your sexual appetites insatiable you never ever make me wait able delectable inflatable you you don't have problems with your weight at all you never steal food off my plate at all I never have to masturbate all unstoppable inflatable you you never seem to menstruate at all so you're not angry when I'm late at all I feel permanently for later bull unpoppable and inflatable you whether you win my arms I feel we could just fly away with the right kind of gas I might even try it sometime in this ocean of life I'm never afraid on my drown we could just float forever I have the web to whenever my tablet of our love is arrived your thighs and buttocks are so holdable you always do just what you're told about and if we argue you just foldable controllable consolable you my mate so reckon you are suitable i took you around to watch the beautiful and stephen gary said you're root able for a beautiful commutable you yon have the sensitive are tickly when I rub you masking goes prettily it's known a static electricity Felicity when I'm kissing you your skin is so smooth I couldn't afford you with hair you have all the holes real girls have gone +1 for thee your problems are simple life don't need my masters in sight - now if you get down I just perk you right up with a couple of squirts right - pump up my fight and I'll go wake up when I snore it all at rate which I find quite adorable you have a box and you are storable ignore abode back dorable you any sexual positions feasible although you don't bend at the knees at all Yahoo chiz are so firm and squeezable increase of o1 crease of bio you don't complain about my hairy back about the inches that downstairs I lack you're not disgusted by my furry crack the Bacharach jack kerouac ooh now birth control is not an issue I clean it all off with it I bet my jealous friends all wish you were insatiably inflated leaders don't I don't know me don't let me down and I won't let you down Hey hello hi what's your name how y'all doing oh thank you relate I thought for a second there you hadn't elected a leader anarchy I'm fine thank you what's your name leader Abbey huh look a little Church generous like a church thanks for asking I'm fine good I'm Tim for those of you who just sort of popped down taking a punt on the small newspaper advertisement or something I just give you a bit of background I'm Mayim person I grew I I grew up I've got born and born and bred in Perth Western Australia well thank you I I did I did next to nothing to that privilege but uh thanks anyway uh I now live in London in the United Kingdom which is a great Perth as you guys from Perth yeah all right well as you know it's quite a quiet place those of you or visit it's quite a small place London's very busy it's got a real sense of excitement and I love Perth that London's got this sort of sense of urban danger which is very seductive you know where I live in the north light for example an ambulance seems to go past my house with it sirens blaring like once every three minutes seems to be a statistically improbable number of North Londoners requiring urgent medical attention at any given time and and you can't help but feel excited because odds are you can't help but feel one of these days one of those ambulances is going to come for you and it's different over there even though and I mean the ambulances for example every time they go past my house I noticed they have their writings green for one that's weird and that says on the side in big letters emergency ambulance which is that surely the adjective is kind of implied by the noun but then I figured it was probably just to distinguish them from our ones over here they're just normal ambulances you know a little bit more laid-back I don't really emerge I just kind of amble a hang out in parks like massively over a quick mr. whippy vans everything is more complicated their taxis there you know in Australia just have taxis you just ring one you get in it and you go somewhere they've got all the different types of taxis um the main one of course that the famous are black cab you know the English cabin and their you know proper and they've got proper English cabbies and then there's got this whole other set of taxis called minicabs you guys heard a mini cabs been to London a bit and well they just look like normal cars but they have a special sticker and the driver has a special license and is allowed to act as a taxi and then this is whole other group of public transport vehicles that I hadn't heard about when I moved there and they're called illegal minicabs and they're just dudes in cars and and there are only cab drivers in the same sense that my mate Pete is the pharmacist and as the name suggests they are illegal and are though they're a bit of a sort of scary thing in London I'd never heard of them but when I first got there I was staying um near old Street Station which is on the northern those Londoners you know old straight I'll stay on new North Road just near old Street and I was walking down new North Road when I first got there towards old Street and I came across a bus stop with a bus stop advertisement you know it's on six foot high and it said if you want to know how much an illegal mini cab could cost you same things ask a rape victim that's how that I felt shocked I was like well I look I get the point you're trying to get across the Mint's very important but in the middle of the street a child could realize I just thought that's not necessary that sort of thing but I sure learned my lesson because a couple of nights later after I saw this sign I was in Soho having it having a drink with some friends I went to the bar and I met a girl you understand good no what are you getting that sort of meeting and I got talking to this girl she's a really great girl we got chatting and we talked all night but we got pretty drunk and eventually it got sort of heavy the conversation and she disclosed to me that she had been the victim of a sexual assault so I asked her how much an illegal mini cab would cost from Soho to new North Road near old Street where I was staying I'll never forget what she said she said about eight pounds fifty I mean it was closer than a nine but I'm surprised the system works at all but apart from the sort of ham dancers and the dangerous public transport London is great as definitely the place for me because to be honest um I'm trying to try to get famous and and you know celebrities belong in London I think it's a great place for them to bring up the kids they've bought off poor people who live in less great places and and I'm not doing great but I have met some famous people I've got to tell you about his gigs it was really exciting I did a charity gig and I had to go on stage after Mariah Carey it was I can't camel straight after her and played inflatable you I wasn't deliberate but it sure resonated with the poignancy that I hadn't before um while staying I was really nervous as you can imagine I mean this I was standing backstage watching this woman this the one of the greatest pop voices of all time just tearing it to shreds on stage and this tiny little dress going well and I was just thinking what how can I go on after that you know that's amazing and it's do this backstage dude came up to me and said she's lip-syncing I thought what a you know that subtly the magic that is Mariah Carey kind of disappeared and as it felt like I was watching a sort of cheap drag show but without the intrigue of trans mysticism to my knowledge and also I thought sure Mariah you're a professional you have your reasons lip-sync if you want to but if you're gonna lip-sync why would you do a Mariah Carey song this is a song about the music industry trying to get famous and having no death he doesn't have a problem with drugs he just doesn't do them he's fine that his mates have tattoos but he reckons they'll rue them he likes going to pubs but he hates it when the music's too loud he tends not to go to rock concerts cuz he can't stand the crowd but all he's ever wanted to be is a rock style and rage or MTV but he knows that it's not likely he just turned 30 he knows that he will always be a rock n roll nerd he'll keep writing songs the world will never heal and do they want me hurt he'll just keep writing oh yeah him but you see the problem is he always dreamed of being a star but he learned piano instead of guitar which in the 90s didn't get you very far so while the other kids were learning stairway he was the piano to their 14 body was convinced one day he'd Rock their asses and be an icon for the disenfranchised masses the growers here long and rebel against the state but just for now that adapt away to Klaus he's running late for his morning class we'll always be playin geeks that no one knows about do it sounds out turtle just keep playing oh yeah let us see the problem is there's not much depth in what he's sing him he's a victim of his upper middle class upbringing so he can't write about the hood or bling-bling so he sits and imagines his girlfriend is dead - trying to vote some angst in his middle-class head but the is always fine at half-past nine when he go to bed but he's not spent a single night in prison he has no issues with nutrition he has no drinking problem and no drug addiction unless you count the drugs they bought and chicken no rat never wonder always tends to make him cough he doesn't look God with his t-shirt off or when he tries to act up you can tell he's tricking Duncan while his mates go out late but pop and pals Anaheim and fauna he goes home and showers who gets a good eight hours he gets his thrills from his morning run a while his mates will go on dates I've taken speed and drinking hands of Jim Beam and please these home cooks curls up with a book where the garlic's happened to t 117a cause you never really been part of the scene while the other kids laugh commas he like clean there's more in the Beatles and the stones he's more Stevie Wonder then Ramones and it never round a panel man he never shot a pant about them you don't know the difference between metal and trash you couldn't tell you nothing about Axl little slash you liked Pan falls and the Jackson 5 he knows all the work to serve and though he wants to be a bungee and cool at a profit school so it don't matter how we try you can all hide behind his rock'n'roll why's he got to be the goddess are you dumb da Li the rocket are you wanna save me the guitar daily the rocket are you out but he knows that his music lacks depth but it just can't be helped he has nothing interesting to say so he writes about himself but he doesn't want to see himself obsessed so he writes in third person in an attempt to seem more rock and roll but he suspects it's not work and deep in is hard he knows he will never be bono or Bowie and even if he was quite pretty small pants like Kylie he knows that he don't care about sounds outside sound body bunkai he wants to walk and he will never be neater but it'll always be a fucked-up little tryhard wannabe rock'n'roll nerd rocky wrong hey thanks thanks have a problem with stockbrokers and it's not it's a stockbrokers in the audience I don't know upsetting on it's not I don't have a problem with the job you do I'm not even not even entirely sure what it is but my problem is a grammatical issue because broke is the past tense a break so strictly I don't you can have a broker but I'd I don't call myself a singer this is a song about the conversation I had with a stockbroker in a pub once it's actually a fait poem cool huh it's called Mitsubishi Colt he looks at me intensely eyes sparkle contact lens green with artificial Envy his head and fixes me with a condescending stare flicks his bleached blond hip hair and theorizes thus you know what I reckon pause for effect adjust his tackle as if it's semi erect I figure I better give him what I know he expects what do you reckon hand on the shoulder and a bunk yella wink sips his lemon drink spits out the pips hands on hips licks his lips like a wolf near a flock and yet again adjusting this fantasy he delivers his philosophy eirick in a don't matter it don't mean squat yn or what you got or the style of your hair or what you wear and that is not I mean what do you care that I live on a hill with views of the beach that magic sand my dogs have an ensuite bathroom each that I've already reached my first 10 million and I'm only 36 the era Snickers two bricks if you think you can fix what is broken your life with money and the funny thing is and I you not I would give it a lot like that and you leave me to ponder his wisdom for a bit and with a click of his fingers he beckons the blondest bimbo Escobar made and grinning ridiculously orders a G&T and a beer for me and before I can escape these back saying cuz make the thing is all that crap it's all superficial it's all just a front I mean anyone can be a rich but the thing we all want be bought with gosh you know what I mean boss cuz not like you give a toss that when I want to get slim I've got my own private gym and a personal trainer call Danielle or Darlene she's got tits like those chicks in Playboy magazine it's not like you care that I own a controlling share of an overseas company that builds accounting software it matters not one bit I mean who gives a if I earn six hundred grand and drive a brand new Land Rover you know I hand it all over like that he pauses for a bita long enough for me to retreat to a seat and sit elbow on bar and contemplate this guru with his white teeth in his big car ponder silently my belief that genius comes in many forms and that this postulating Tarak sided pornstar prick ain't one of them my speculation cut short as he reforms like Terminator 2 before I have time to abort he descends upon me and snorts I guess what I'm trying to say in my own little way is that Huracan muses and Addyson that or I reckon they're great I know some people who reckon you guys just sit on your bums and don't get out of bed til the pizza man comes and smoked bones take Iraq and wank off all day but I don't care what they say and I don't listen to people who say all actors are gay not that I don't think that's ok I mean as far as I'm concerned although it's not my bag if you want to be a bag do be a you know I mean Who am I to say where you're coming where you go in the privacy of your own home haha me now my eyes start to glaze and through the haze of my anger I notice his GMT is gone and he started to dribble as he dribbles on and on beanies Oh sir I don't know much about music but another life and I reckon I'll give it all into belie you Jim - because you might be poor in monetary terms but what you earn spiritually what makes you what you are just means so much more than what you'll get from a really nice car or a tennis court or holidays in Greece or a house on the beach or stock market shares or 31 pairs of gallon Klein underwear do you understand you are a wealthy wealthy man and my I don't wanna piss in your pockets but I'm gonna say before I get over way that honestly and I'm not having you on work in one day you could play piano as good as Elton John the cops are still mingling though the crowd shuffled out I've got ice on my hand when my fists met his mouth and although I explained that it wasn't my fault have an 800 baht fine for aggravated assault so before it gets worse I reckon I'll bolt a wealthy wealthy man in a 1981 Mitsubishi Colt ha there are several unrelaxed so um I've been um I've been uh I've got this little personal confession I've been um I've been going to see a psychologist recently I know well Pete I know I know it's weird because obviously on stage I look like totally well-adjusted and so it comes as a surprise but I've been um speaking to this site is it's not a big deal just talking about stuff few little things that I think I you know could probably just make my life a bit easier one of the issues I have is um with anger so I don't get I don't get angry um so these shoes not really an anger issue it's that I don't know how to express anger which is nice yeah I'm basically it's nice to be diplomatic and stuff but I comes from a fear of confrontation I think so um so I've been talking to this because I worry about what's happening to all that anger that latent anger that I'm not expressing you know so anyway he reckons what I should do is write my feelings down there by expressing myself without having to confront anyone so that I don't you know um bottle it up and so I've been doing that I've been doing some writing and I've written a poem which is really helpful to write um I think it might be even more helpful to sort of do in in front of a sympathetic non-judgmental kinda neutral crowd like you guys so this is um this is my poem it's called I've given a title that's called angry or in brackets feet bit nervous because of it it's that bit more personal sometimes I get a bit angry but you couldn't tell no you couldn't tell unless you looked real closely sometimes I get a bit angry but it's alright yes it's alright because I keep it out of sight inside deep inside I breastfed till I was nine which Michael back doctor says is fine and he also says I deal with anger better if I wrote about myself in a poem or a letter my mother was a caring lady she taught me all I know all I was a little slow she never gave up she never let me slap down although she's spent a lot of time at the neighbor's house when my dad was out of town I didn't walk till I was 7 or talk till I was 10 but neither did Napoleon according to Michael what doctor who has certificates in frames to substantiate his dodgy frakkin claims my father left my mother for the love of a birthday mother and I have a bastard brother who I've never really known because my dad moved up to Sydney and he doesn't have a bull you fat telephone in primary school I had trouble making ashtrays friends an issue which has become somewhat of a trend the origin of which I cannot pretend does not flex me although Macbook back doctor says it's cool and that loads of fat bridge kids at school have problems with communication and that a course of medication would be wise and combined with more honest self-expression could help me with my issues with emotional repression and a 200 bucks a session I think I'll take the feeding vasty chaps advice so I quite like porn photography and books on guns history and I'd like to be a poo I'd like to be a politician vet and I feel as I get older or more in control of my violent tendencies and then when I die die I'll have no regrets and I feel that all this writing is really Buffy exciting and my doctor would be proud because I feel a lot less angry and I'm saying stuff out loud and I'm letting anger out like today in our last session when I taught the quack a lesson cuz he said I'm not progressing said I wasn't moving forward so I said well let's see how you move without your legs and I tied him to his chair and I pulled out my machete and I listened to him beg and then I cut his feet off and while he lay there bleeding I used his feet to kick him in the head thank you eating I hope that was that help that was very hot that yeah I feel a lot better yes thank you thank you um Abby another man just asked a question you a leader or what I think um it's funny actually I sometimes it's a bit of language in there um in that piece and I got a letter recently from a woman when I when I was performing Perth saying that she didn't see why I had to use such a crash language and I wrote back sort of explaining that language changes you know that whole vernacular is different in the moral standards change and and and that these words are in common usage now and I cited this um true story I saw on the front page of The Australian newspaper um the word on the front page of the paper I mean things have changed and all I had to do to get away with it was Bella F asterisk asterisk a really weird that a little star could be enough to soothe our fickle outrage you know it's a name and anyway because the F asterisk asterisk a is so commonly used these days it actually these days means more than means it's almost a counterproductive disguise it's like am like a pedophile wearing brown tinted aviator glasses when he goes to the pool if anything makes him look more like a pedophile strangely and also pointed this out my letter um the protection afforded the the word fact by the humble asterisk does not necessarily apply to all words even seemingly innocuous perfectly harmless words like any word like take take the word finger very example perfectly harmless word but when used in a sentence such as and I want to finger your mum unless a could be construed by some senses as deemed offensive now you have to say that the offensive word in that sentence is the word finger used in this case as a verb or a doing word but you would not get that sentence on the front page of the Australian newspaper by spelling F asterisk asterisk ger and that's because it's the context in which the word is used that makes it offensive in which case you might be better off spelling the sentence I want to finger you're in asterisk in I guess the reason I brought that up I guess I'm saying is if anyone has been offended so far by any anything if you're the sort of person that finds any of that sort of stuff objectionable or for that matter if you're quite a religious if you're a religious person might want to pop out for about five minutes this is a song about anal sex in God it's sir it's called ten-foot and a few hundred Persians so you're gonna live in paradise with a 10-foot and a few hundred virgins so you're gonna live in paradise with the temple and a few hundred burdens so you're gonna sacrifice your life for a ride on a UFO and when the Lord comes down in his shimmering chariot of salvation we are gonna be the first turn now and so if God was there from the very beginning he invented men and women then he also invented wanking then he said when King was sending son away from feeling Randy I'm not a lap and Shandi but having sex with my family that is just great it's all there in Ezekiel eight just the four you up on top his big pearly gate and says that it's a sin to take it up the date even if it's great even with your cowboy mate so I gotta live in bad eyes you be the ten-foot talkin of you hundred pageants so you're gonna sacrifice your life apart shot at the greener grass and when the Lord comes down with his shiny rod of judgment he's gonna kick my heat on us so if you cover the bodies of your women everybody is grinning because black is so slim and low it's not great for swimming Medicus you an erection with the increased sexual tension what would the UV protection that is second to none you'll find it all in that corner just next to the bit of justifies guns and says that it's a sin to take it up the bomber even if it's fun leaving with permission from your mom but NATO so you got a little paradise with him Papa gonna be Wonder battles so you're gonna sacrifice your life for a shot at eternity and when the Lord comes down and I haven't done my penance he's gonna disembowel me oh you say that if I stumbled on a watch I'd assumed it had a watchmaker that a muffin presupposes a baker so we must agree sooner or later that this proves there's a creator so if I put a foot in a stinker it assumed the distance of a swing tap plus you don't need to be a great thinker toodle-blue that gods among which the gates the word the Genesis one which bring him out of be so much fun until Adam succumb to temptation but then his healthy son got mail to gum all Middle Eastern equivalent which suggests that God's omniscience is nullified by his ambivalence unless it turns out that is impotent and if God can get a boner I guess that explains the plethora a few directions in his honor cuz we all know steeples just a subconscious commentator a manifestation of a huge Tim penis and still eat ours as a Latinas to stick a penis up your anus even if you're famous even if you're good at tennis my bar ride on a UFO and when the Lord comes down with his big stiff slippery run up judge man I'm gonna be the first to go he's gonna send me no he's gonna whip me like you're leaving so I'm gonna be the faster um I think thank you sons sometimes um sometimes because material like that doesn't necessarily respect entirely some of the idiosyncrasies of a couple of the major monotheistic doctrines um people make the assumption upon listening to such material that I'm not religious myself which is pretty spot-on but it's sort of beside the point I don't want to be divisive you know and besides I think I think you can be spiritual I think I think you can have a deep sense of spirituality without actually adhering to any other major religions um as it turns out I'm not at all spiritual I just got this real sense of emptiness but I believe in things you know I believe in rocks and gravity and and I have like a relativist morality which I can manipulate to suit my worldview so that I can justify group sex for example whilst of whoring group prayer works for me but yeah you have to admit really ironically I guess given all the religious violence in the world one of the things that actually binds us all that that we all have in common across all cultures and indeed all time since the beginning of recorded thought is this tendency to invoke the supernatural to help us explain those things in our lives which we find difficult to explain using only the evidence of hand you know a modern example of this I saw on telly recently a show about I was called I think it was miracles in the womb or um or extreme wounds or sided changing wounds it wasn't that it was about it was about multiple births and a woman had given birth to naturally conceived identical quadruplets which is very rare and she said um the doctors told me there was a one in 64 million chance that this could happen it's a miracle of course as we know it's not because um because things that have a 1 in 64 million chance of happening happen time to presume that you're one in 64 million chance thing is a miracle is to significantly underestimate the total number of things that there are maths it's interesting actually now that I live overseas it struck me anew when I when I came back to Australia this time that here we've seen this compulsion towards the supernatural new mystical seems to manifest itself mostly in Australia in in the presence of bumper stickers you know the ones I'm talking about there they're usually purple and they generally imply the existence of a benevolent spirit of some sort that looking after us all and especially the people who bothered to put the sticker on their bumper that they say things like the goddess is dancing them my favorite probably is a don't drive faster than your angel can fly as if of all the possible restrictions an angel might face speed unless that is proposing the possibility of the existence of unfit angels and probably the one that annoys me most because it's most common I think is I'm sure you've all seen it magic happens magic happens they usually Sparkle I just don't know what it is about magic happens stickers on cars but every time I see one I want to count my permanent marker and sneak over and right underneath it so does cot death under which a spiritual person were they're slightly more ephemeral marker might choose to write something like um yeah but sometimes the magician has to do bad magic in order to a test out a or B for the purpose of a greater good under which someone like me with their permanent marker might choose to write something along the lines of off that's ending and otherwise perfectly sensible bumper based philosophical argument I have a particular religious friend I go head-to-head with and get very boring at dinner parties with on these sort of big questions and um he always sort of seems to think that to be skeptical is to be cynical and that my view of the world sees no beauty which which I always argue is not the case I mean I find the world a really exciting place there are ideas that are a bit more sciency and that of just as exciting as the kind of magicky ones you know like like that one of the greatest ideas of all time evolution the theory of natural selection you know not only is it um how do you say right and I'm just practicing my timing for my American tour pause right and duck ah I mean not only as a good science but it's also really thrilling don't you think this idea that an individual of a species can be born sort of mutated in a good way and in the moment of that individuals birth that holds within its genetic code the potential for its entire species to take a huge evolutionary leap forward it's amazing and I always think what would life have been like being one of those individual mutant freaks you know what are the other kids think imagine being the first dude ever to have feet I reckon that would be really tough and also what I wonder is how did these individuals with their new bits like how did they figure out how to use them do they just stumble upon their potential purpose one day just accidentally you know imagine you're you're a fish and you're just swimming in the ocean with your school and you're just hanging out swimming same as always because your fish and and suddenly out of nowhere um Tony I can Tony Tony just goes oh I'm getting out yeah I'm a freezing you're a fish Tony yeah well I'm a cold fish I just want to pop out for a bit you know maybe lion Mattel bring you an ice cream yeah don't bother tiny you're a freak come on school let's go that's Oscar sighs him for being different yeah let's ostracize Tony's a frequent ostracizing for being different no don't ostracize me I'm just a little bit different Oh buggier then I'll show you guys me those are gonna come in here and imagine what Tony would think standing there on his brand-new feet on the brink of the beginnings of mankind as we know it if if he could look forward just a few short hundreds of millions of years to see one of his descendants an Israeli Jew by the name of Zeus having a nail hammered through his feet the very feet that Tony provided him with as a punishment for having a sort of schizophrenic discourse with a God who was created by man to explain the existence of feet in the absence of the knowledge of the existence of Tony I think that would blow his little fishy mind um this religious friend of mine our arguments often end with him telling me that I'm not very open-minded and because he's my friend and I respect him I've written and my song it's called if you open your mind too much your brain will fall out which I think brilliant is so so clever unfortunately I didn't come up with myself I read that in a book so to avoid copyright issues I've given it a subtitle which is take my wife if anyone can show me one example in the history of the world of a single psychic who's been able to prove under reasonable experimental conditions that they are able to read minds and if anyone can show me one example in the history of the world of a single last religious been able to prove under reasonable experimental conditions that they can predict future human events by interpreting celestial signs and if anyone can show me one example in the history of the world of a single homeopathic practitioner who's been able to prove under reasonable experimental conditions that solutions made up of infinitely tiny particles of good stuff dissolved repeatedly into relatively huge quantities of water have a consistently higher medicinal value than a similarly administered placebo and if anyone can show me one example in the history of the world of a single spiritual person who's been able to show either empirically or logically the existence of a higher power with any consciousness or interest in the human race or ability to punish or reward humans for their moral choices or that there is any reason other than fear to believe in any version of an afterlife I will give you my piano one of my legs and my wife I think it's important I think it's important that even if you know one's job as it is in my cases is to is to entertain it's such an honor to have an audience like you watching me for hours and hours and and and I think sometimes that I should respect that honor I guess by by trying to do something with a bit of a message in it so it's not purely entertainment but but there's something that you guys can take away and in some way it's a grand aim but in some way that maybe I could contribute to the betterment of the world you know so I'm not this song she addresses an environmental issue about which I feel very strongly and I'd love to perform it for you now in the hope that maybe we can contribute to the resolution of this issue um hit it take your canvas bags we're gone to the supermarket why use plastic bags when you know you know the world can't take it take your canvas bags when you go to the silver market Maidan mock a hanging yawn don't you use those plastic ones no no no don't you know that you'll feel better for it take your canvas bags take your canvas bags take your canvas bags to the supermarket take your canvas bags take your canvas bags take your canvas bag to the supermarket take your canvas bags take your canvas bags take your canvas bags to the supermarket take your canvas bags take your canvas bags to the supermarket break it down take your campus take your campus but you can dispatch to trouble market all the ladies in the house coming here saying canvass all cells in the house come on take a bus route get rid of all the plastic we just need to get Susie a shtick organize a competition gymnastic or a band making comp in your school bucket they get into Scholastic canvas is for everyone will you be rebellious on iconoclastic what conservative or ecclesiastic I don't care if you're loud and bombastic or quiet or virtually monastic solo on the wall fasting are yoga master to play an elastic I'm not trying to be ironical sarcastic do something dressy mom's back so my my kids up cuz it all in this interval so - that's Angelo without the interval

Channel: UberScouse

Views: 987,300

Keywords: Tim, Minchin, So, Live, Part

Id: 2C9-MNKWNaI

Length: 62min 53sec (3773 seconds)

Published: Tue Dec 27 2011

Reddit Comments

[u/maniacallore]

Minchin is the man