This is what really happened between Gabbie Hanna and me, from my side. (receipts shown, not read)

before I start I want to show you how Gabi has characterized this video before seeing it before he was even made - Gabi this isn't just us telling our sides to a story according to her this is war thus I will not accept that sending a hate mob on me was less than an attack these discord messages tell me that 8 she either expects me to tell lies without any evidence that I would or be she has told so many lies that she knows the truth will sound twisted compared to her story she's telling her fans to spread truth when the only people who know what happened are me and her I'm not asking you to blindly believe me please don't my supporters I'm speaking to you - I only ask that you pay attention to what makes sense nothing else and to my supporters there's no need to spread truth the truth speaks for itself and thus there's no need to address Gabi or her stands on my behalf there's no need to defend me because the story is there the facts are there and beyond what we're able to show you the rest is speculation her word verse mine again you can only make your best guess based on what makes sense do not spread truth before you seek truth and - Gabi supporters asking any questions if you're only asking to debunk what I'm saying that simply won't happen unless there are holes in my story which there aren't whereas there are holes in every single one of hers so ask me questions but only if you are in fact seeking truth again pay attention to what actually makes sense hey there um so yesterday Gabi Hannah took to livestream to talk about me for about an hour and a half to her fans and really characterized me in a way that was very negative and very Mis representative of Who I am and how our interactions have gone over the past couple of days as you may know during this live stream she did SiC her fans on me by giving them permission to defend her as they saw fit even though this is something that she never really encourages them to do a lot of people were confused by that live stream a lot of people have been confused because they've seen evidence that Gabi and I have been interacting with her negatively or positively and that's what this video set out to do I originally said that I was going to address my subscribers and let them know what has been going on between me and Gabi the past couple of days to explain why I've seemed to go from hot to cold to quiet and now hot again mostly on Twitter in regards to Gabi I thought I did the right thing by giving Gabi a heads up to let her know that I would be talking to my subscribers about this and from there she quickly hopped on livestream to speak on this before I could have a chance because according to her this is war so I wanted to make sure that I was calm and collected before I talk to you guys about what's been going on and I really just want to tell you guys from my perspective you got one perspective now from my perspective what actually happened what may have been misunderstood completely misrepresented or flat-out lied about and so I started watching this live stream and taking notes of different points she was making that were very untrue or twisted or what have you in addition to a handful of points that people have reached out to me about asking can you clarify this this doesn't seem right or something that's off about this can you talk about this so between those two lists I don't even know how long this video will be and I will try to be as concise as possible but if you've been here before you know that concise is not my strong point but I do want to go down this list of these points these points that I just feel need either to be righted or clarified and then from there I would like to tell you guys from my perspective how this past week has played out how I actually feel and provide you guys with this many receipts as possible um this video was meant to be more broad it was supposed to be a more vague explanation without bringing in receipts because I was just going to explain briefly to my audience would have been going on but now because Gabi took to livestream and said a lot about me I have to take this route but before I go into this list and this narrative about what happened I do want to make something clear I am NOT the victim in this situation I will say I was a victim of being attacked by thousands of fans of Gabi as a result of her endorsement to do so that I was completely the victim of but otherwise I engaged in these conversations with Gabi I played a role in this and so I'm not going to give you guys a sob story about how she victimized me and anything or anything like that I know that's what she expects it's not how I roll and it's not what I've ever intended to do so getting to this list that I started to compile just running through these points this is what we will be touching on and as I tell the story but I may go back to through this list of kind of clarify further so Gabi characterized me as saying why does Gabi insist I hate her Gabi said that I was only angry about a messy situation with the mutual friend she said that I was taking everything she said that wasn't specific to me so personally she said that I felt lied to that her friend was lying when in fact nobody was talking about me she said that I told her that she crossed a line this is more of a misunderstanding but we'll get to that she talked about an issue around a Content claim as far as I remember there were no lies there I just would like to give further context she said that I think she's talking about me all the time she said that on our phone call I was crying because her fans were sponding to me on Twitter and because she responded to me on Twitter and that I didn't expect her to she says that I called her a narcissist she says that I think and I told her that I think that one of her song lyrics is about me specifically and the things other people pointed out to me she said that I threatened to expose her she said that once I made a video the narrative would be that Gabi Hanna manipulates small channels to get them to make positive videos about her she said that I'm oddly into or like Payton and that I'm jealous of Payton and Irene there's definitely an explanation for that and more or less she referred to me as a massive fan and told this story that really I believe and my fans and patrons and viewers believe painted this picture of me as this deranged fan that has taken everything so personally that was not about me and now I'm so hurt that I didn't receive enough attention from her so I do want to talk about all of this but I will say that I posted a video on Monday um where I talked about really where this all started so but actually I want to go back to before Monday it was sometime last weekend I believe Saturday it was I was walking home from the grocery store I checked Twitter I don't I've never really tweeted much but I was starting to check it a little more often and I saw a DM from a guy and his DM said something along the lines of hey I don't know how I came across your video but the this girl that you're bashing in your video is somebody that I started talking to I'm not like a stand of hers but she's just this girl whose tweets I thought were funny and I think you're being unfair to her she's in a really rough spot right now I didn't take issue with what he said in fact I thanked him for his feedback as I usually do um I explained a little bit about why um I think my tone seems this way at times but at the same time I'm not going to tell somebody that they're wrong in how I come across because that's up to each person to decide um and I had an inkling that he was talking about Gabi Hannah and so I I looked at his profile briefly and saw that he was followed by Gabi Hannah and jokingly said something like oh she's followed she's following you you're like famous right and he's like oh stop but I will say that we continued to talk about me and my experiences and where I'm coming from in my videos he was very complimentary of me I was very complimentary of him but I will say that over the course of the past week he is almost exclusively stood up for Gabi which I respected and I do respect still he seemed to be a very kind guy a very compassionate guy and one who just felt for Gabi in the situation that she's been going through over the past week so that's been fine but we he he has reached up so he initially reached out to me I want to make that clear and since then every day has reached out to me no I can't say that with complete confidence that there wasn't a single day passed a couple of days that I reached out to him first but it was where he reached out to me I think on Saturday initially and then on Sunday he's like hey hello and then Monday and you know I didn't been at him and it's been a while since I have made my regular content I finally was getting on the ball I've been keeping consistent with the podcast but it had been a while since I've worked on my history of scandals in controversy series which I added apart coming up and so I got around to finishing the podcast of filming that part for that series and then I filmed a commentary talking about something to do with Gabi Hannah this was Sunday that felt great I was finally getting back in the swing of things and making regular content again however when I stopped recording I received a lot of messages from people saying do you see Gabi on live I'm very concerned things don't seem okay she doesn't seem okay and I didn't know what was going on and I didn't immediately go check it out because although I've been interested in her in her life it wasn't to that degree but it wasn't until I was speaking to this friend I'm just gonna call him Jim at this point so that I don't keep saying friend um Jim and I were speaking in DMS and he said I'm not quoting verbatim but paraphrasing but very much to the sentiment of oh no she's talking about my conversations with her on her video I don't like this I didn't want to be involved in this so at that point I did decide to go and see what was going on in this live stream that various people were talking to me about and I saw that she was super super distraught that you know something didn't go right with her music video that she released that she was not seeing the numbers that made sense and thus believed that something was going on on YouTube side whether it be by a mistake or a conspiracy something was going on and to this day I'm not discrediting her and the possibility that any of that could be true but the other side of this is that part of her frustration was that not only that she feel YouTube was affecting her view counts her subscribers being unsubscribe to their channels which as a side note somebody did tell me the same things happened to me that she didn't make trending when typically that is the case with her music videos but also what was important to me was that she noted that people or were I think this may have been fixed to some extent she noted that people were being served nothing but hate videos about her which I really wouldn't have taken personally or would not have spoken out about if it weren't for the fact that she referred to this friend Jim and their conversations and said that she was speaking to this friend and that initially they were talking about music she sent him a few of her music videos and then when he opened his youtube again it was nothing but hate videos about Gabby and she made it very clear that it was nothing every single video was a hate video about her and so thus because Jim reached out to me to talk about my video that he came across by I suppose transitive property it makes very much sense that my video or at least the one he saw would fall under this umbrella of hate of which she was speaking at no point did I think that she was specifically talking about me and at no point did I really think that she knew who I was so certainly I never thought that that statement or anything like it in the coming days was specifically aimed at me let's be clear about that I just considered myself somebody who fell under this umbrella and I spoke up about that unfortunately I spoke up at a time when I was falling asleep and did not express myself well I didn't say anything bad I didn't say anything that was entirely untrue I was just confusing in my video it's about a 12-minute video that I recorded after not even after finishing a life it was during the life I said that watching this live was I was getting more anxious as Gabby was getting more anxious but I wanted to speak to this concept that these videos are all hate and I briefly alluded to the reason I'm including myself in this is because of a conversation I had with this mutual friend Jim however in the morning I woke up to see comments where people were generally confused about what I was getting at and which when my own subscribers are confused by my message that's when I know that I need to take that down and explain myself like it or not that's how I operate so I did once I you know was fully awake and refreshed and collected I made another video which is up on my channel during which I explained where I was coming from the night before and how I actually feel about this stuff and I'll probably include a couple of Clips here but I posted this on Twitter she deserves for somebody to sit down with her and look through the data and talk about whether or not this has happened and show some damn receipts so just kind of glossed over that and that one little detail was really all the reason that I made that video I jumped the gun in just hopping on camera and being like guy she's talking about me like oh I don't want to sound like that but I had reason to believe that's not the case and that's what I didn't explain to you guys didn't explain well enough maybe I was trying to protect someone but I'm not going to anymore I don't I don't think that I'm that important I'm no I am not that important I made it very clear I do not think that somebody like me especially with the platform of my size her platform is 200 times the size of mine so let's keep that in mind I said that there is no way that I thought Gabby was speaking to me specifically I even sarcastically said who the hell do I think I am to think that this would be about me because I didn't I didn't think it was about me and in fact in the video well let me finish on this one um I went on to speak about this and clarify that I probably was trying to protect Jim a little too much which wasn't necessary because he was never named so I went ahead and explained this is why I put myself under that umbrella of hate it is because of what Jim said to me what Jim said to Gabby and then what Gabby told her audience and looking back on it that's a lot of telephone right so it's really not something for me to take very personally I think I was just kind of like sick of hearing things referred to as hate that in my opinion and a lot of people's opinions are not hate so whether she was talking about me or not I do believe that a lot of what she refers to as hate is not it just simply isn't and it was maybe that day somebody posted on Twitter that it was under a thread I guess that was under Dustin Daley somebody said that I made a video covering um Gabby's eye I called it a non-apology expose video she didn't really seem to like that but if I say that I think you guys know which video I mean it was kind of her explanation for addressing various youtubers and Beyonce and so somebody said in that thread that Hello leash made a video responding to this and it was very fair and I think that was referring to Gabby's notion that once she told her side of the story that all of the other channels were crickets crickets meaning that nobody addressed her side and so this person pointed out like hey you might want to go watch how Alicia's video is very fair in my opinion and I replied to that I said yeah but I don't agree with everything she says so I am hateful and I totally owned that that is a a snarky remark and is very representative of some of the things I say about Gabby whether that be on Twitter or on my youtube channel there are other times that I say very kind and complimentary things um I think I just recently watched the bad karma video and I talked about how this was the best quarantine production I had ever seen and will stand the test of time I have encouraged her when she has felt confident and posted pictures where she feels good about herself and I have stood up for her when I felt people were mistreating her so there's a mix oh you guys know I've been critical but at the same time I've been compassion where I feel it's necessary so this tweet that I said it really I don't think it was anything crazy or hateful it was a little bit snarky and and that's it and then I forgot about that of that tweet and kind of went about my life until later that evening I checked Twitter and saw all kinds of responses from Gabby Hanna on this tweet somehow it got split up into different threads so it's a little confusing but essentially she kept asking me why do you think that I hate you um or when did I call you hateful why do you keep saying that I think you're hateful I don't know you I've never watched one of your videos I never I never spoke about you I never addressed you and in response to those tweets I started to explain again in the thread here and a thread here I said something very close to I think that things just got messy in these conversations between our us and our mutual friend and then in another thread I said I think lines just got crossed when we were speaking through a mutual friend and I want to clarify something because like I said Gabby did point out and said that I accused her of crossing a line she said I crossed the line I want to clarify to anybody that took that that way and to Gabby I want to make it very clear because you deserve to know that I didn't that in the sense that you crossed a boundary I meant that in the way that in the telephone sense let me let me see if I can find an explanation of the idiom because I'm I'm wondering if it's really not that commonly used as I thought it was okay so I just googled lines got crossed and the first response says get one's lines crossed to have a misunderstanding or miscommunication with someone else I'm sorry I'm late I thought we were getting here at 8:00 we must have gotten our lines crossed my mom and I got our lines crossed and now there's no one here to babysit the kids so it's really a reference to the old days when literally phone lines would get crust and then people would get connected to people they weren't actually intending to call or weren't talking to originally so it's it's an idiom the point is to say that I said lines got crossed Gaby took that to mean that I that I believe she crossed a boundary and that it's not what I meant another thing I want to point out before I forget going back to that video I made on Monday explaining what I meant the night before I mentioned that I had recorded a video the day before about Gaby and now that I saw the emotional state she was in the night before I wasn't sure posting that video would be the right thing to do I asked my subscribers to tell me what they thought but ultimately regardless of what they thought I didn't think I didn't decide it over the course of the week that I would post it doesn't mean that I'm not going to know but we'll get to that but I do say in that video and I did post a clip of this to Twitter and I'll probably insert it here everybody knows that if you put my name in the title if you put my face in the thumbnail you're gonna grow your channel you're gonna get clicks you're gonna get views and a couple things I know if she's not speaking to me but she's not not speaking to me you know what I mean I think of course first and foremost she's probably talking to people like Jessie smiles Alex James and Jellicle holes but I'm pretty sure she's noticed me and that whether she has or hasn't I think I fall under that umbrella especially because because of the her stance a in my comments frankly but I make it very clear in that video as well that when Gabi says certain things I don't think that she's speaking directly to me there are just some things that I think she's I say she's not not speaking to me because she does speak generally about behaviors general behaviors and if you display those general behaviors you are a certain way so again making very clear I little old me with just under 27 K subscribers do not and have never thought that Gabi was ever speaking directly to me and in fact will get to a point where she is speaking to me and I didn't think she was talking to me or at least it's very highly speculated that she was speaking about me we'll get there so Gabi and I are going back and forth in tweets about what's going on Utah who's this friend who is Jim what was said what lines crossed what's messy but and I said if you want to go into DM z-- I can tell you that his name and we can talk about it so we did we went into DMS I tried to clarify this story I think it still took some time and a phone call to really understand um what was going on but I explained to her Jim reached out to me Jim told me that I was bashing you in my video Jim told me I should be nicer to you and then Jim told you that he saw nothing but hate videos so that's why I considered myself somebody under this umbrella and her response said something like way so he's my friend and he he defended me and I said yeah this also was spoken about on the phone so I apologize I may be confusing what I said what we said over Twitter with what we said on the phone call but I'll go back and see which was where what was on Twitter but yeah I made it very clear yes he was defending you he seems like a really nice guy I didn't have a problem with him defending you she explained to me that she really she's never seen any of my videos but all that she knew about me was that I was somebody that she didn't like or trust because of what happened over a Content claim or a copyright claim from a month or two ago it was the video where I talked about how Jeffrey Stehr and Gabby Hanna are youtubers who can't take criticism and most of that video focused on Gabby talking about her poetry books that was copyright claimed by awesomeness TV which is Gabby's MCN so when I saw this I was livid we know how Gabby has spoken of drama channels and commentary channels and tea channels and we lump them all in together right hate channels that's what they are so I was livid that she would copyright playing my video so I publicly tweeted I said at Gabby Hanna I again if I can find this I'll show you I am characterizing myself as angry and mean in this moment so if I don't find that tweet hopefully you believe me when I say I was not very nice in this tweet but I said something along the lines that I think I should screenshot or something like that of being copyright claimed and said something to the effect of she was tweeting very angrily that I falsely claimed her YouTube videos and how I'm trying to kill smaller channels from commenting on me which has never been the fact and she very promptly replied to me and was though she did not apologize for the copyright claim and we will note that she at no point says sorry for anything that happened in any of our interactions that I'm sure Gabby if you're watching this you're gonna say because you never owed me an apology and that's fine I just think it's interesting that that is a war that I don't know if I've ever heard out of her mouth maybe she said it in that explanation video but she did explain to me that wasn't me that was my MCN they use this software that scans for our content Papa blah I'll go ahead and talk to them and make sure they take it down but also if this ever happens again in the future feel free to reach out let me know which was so kind of her the way she spoke to me and I thanked her and I also said by the way I'm sorry for how I tweeted I was angry tweeting that's not usually how I speak so I'm sorry and she took it well she was like no big deal no problem she later brought this up in this in these Twitter messages this week that that is how that's all she knew of me she didn't like me the next time I reached out to her about a copyright claim she forwarded it to her MCN but she didn't respond to me because she didn't like me because I should have deleted that tweet and I don't blame her I don't blame her for saying that I should have I just it legitimately never crossed my mind like I said I rarely went on Twitter however I did I was very vocal across the internet to say Gaby Hannah was actually very nice to me about a copyright claim I think I spoke to Rachael Oates about it because she had the same issue and here recently Kat Blaque made a post about how Micah Shaffer copyright claim to her video which was actually done by awesomenesstv the same MCN and I posted on Kat black's post like I don't remember exactly what I said but I said really try reaching out to them directly I did this with Gabby Hannah and she took care of it for me right away so I've been pretty complimentary about her I'm sorry I didn't take down the tweet I really do not delete things off of social media I know that some people do they tweet and delete and tweet you delete and all sorts of stuff it's not something I do and it's not something I thought to do I will be more thoughtful of things like that in the future however had so little to do with the rest of the story and I'm already half an hour in so the conversation kind of started getting quicker and quicker and I can only speculate the reason Gabby said do you want to call is because we were just typing so fast and so fast of course at this point I was so over typing and trying to keep up with her and trying to keep up with my own thoughts that I said short she gave me her phone number I gave her mine called me we got on the phone and initially things started off with her being pretty nice to me I will say it was odd she divulged a lot to me that I didn't feel was any of my business and it definitely had nothing to do with the situation now I know Gabby thinks that I am here to make an expose video about her but again Gabby if you are watching this I have no intention of telling anybody about those things that you expressed to me I don't think that it was my place to hear but or rather as such it is not my place to tell anybody that stuff so no I don't care to expose you I only care to talk about what happened between us and clear my name of some of the many untruths that you said about me so that was part of the beginning of our conversation in the beginning of the conversation - she could tell that I was really upset um we'd already been like furiously tweeting at each other so by the time we got on the phone you you guys that have been on my channel or watched my videos know that I refer to like being in limbic mode being already heated up that you wonder if like you cannot produce a productive conversation in that state so I did tell her I was like I am like already heated up and so so I'm not sure what to say entirely and she asked why I was so upset and I told her that it was a lot I was overwhelmed by how we were going back and forth on Twitter and the other part I said that she didn't share with you guys I I'm also very concerned because I've seen your live streams and how you've expressed the kind of anxiety you've been going through and particularly the part that hit home for me was where you said that Peyton has been by your side while you've been puking through anxiety attacks and because I know anxiety so well I felt so so hard for you when I heard that and now that I'm talking to you on the phone I feel like now I am part of this very painful experience and it's really hard to just not get emotional um while all of this is going on she we talked about the tweet and her response and she asked why did I tweet that and I might have I don't know exactly why I said but I do know that I said well I mean I didn't think that you were gonna see it and which that's not why I said that I said that because I felt that I said that because somebody brought me up and that is how I felt as a response by telling Gaby I didn't think you'd see it that was more me kind of saying like I don't understand why you're upset again 27k 6,000,000 I think the point to really drive home here is why is Gaby Hannah tweeting back and forth with a creator with a platform so small just like she was going back and forth and DMS with a fan or an X fan a fifteen-year-old and now me somebody who's got such a smaller platform why is she so hung up on what I had to say about her so on one hand I never think that she's going to see my tweets or whatever and this is where there's a lot of irony and contradiction in this narrative that she's spun correct is that I think she's obsessed with me on one hand right but on the other hand I'm telling her that I never thought that you would see the tweet and that's why I tweeted it so let's just point out but that doesn't really make sense so as you guys know because I've clarified already I don't think the Gabi notices me or at least well now she does but I didn't think Gabi noticed me and that's not to say that because she didn't notice me I went ahead and I was emboldened to say whatever because I wasn't afraid of a response if I were afraid of her finding out seeing responding why would I make videos criticizing her in the first place yes I expressed in my express in my videos that I'm a fan but I'm pretty damn critical so if I were that worried that Gabi is going to come at me and make a response then I wouldn't make the videos I make so this little tweet that is by the way not hateful snarky at worst I said I don't agree with everything she says therefore I'm hateful so this has been going on and on and on and I don't know that she's going to see the distinction but for me to say I didn't think you were going to see it was more me wondering why you care or why I'm why I didn't think it was a problem to post that it wasn't as mean in my opinion as she saw it and I thought the chances of her seeing it were pretty low anyway she wasn't check her @ mentions she doesn't look for her name she doesn't look for the stuff in and furthermore she's 6 million strong I I'm nothing compared to that this is a David and Goliath situation thing if she's trying to say it was wrong with me to respond to her multiple tweets so to be clear Gabi I have no problem with your personal clap facts I don't just because I didn't expect you to clap back doesn't mean that I was afraid of a clap back so let's be clear why I posted that was just because that's how I felt in the moment but yes I didn't expect you to see it so I think that that's another thing that I think that's another part of the story that really needs to be laid rest there are a couple really like big things that she's harping on that need to be laid to rest one I don't think that she is talking to me directly in these videos where she's being paid no I did not think that she knew who I was or cared to talk to me directly and two I was not afraid of her responding to my tweet yes I was overwhelmed when she responded like I said in rapid-fire fashion I was overwhelmed but I don't have a problem with her responding to my tweets I'm not going to put things public that are critical or whatever if I'm afraid of how somebody might respond so continuing on this conversation we talked about Jim I think I think it was still unclear to Gabby what his involvement was in this link between me and Gabby and why I considered myself to be a hate channel by definition from Gabby so I retold her the story that I told you guys a bunch of times about who Jim is and the role he played still maintained nice guy like he's great he's there's nothing wrong with the guy but he did say these things bubble blah you guys already know I've already expressed it several times to you and to her um she what she took issue with what she said that I said that it was a messy situation with a friend and she said and here more recently she described it as well I'll get there it was a messy situation with a friend and she was like why would you say something like that and Here I am I don't understand what what what the issue is what do you mean what's the problem I said the communication was messy that lines were crossed and she said something to be effective do you know how many times I have been accused of having messy friendships and being messy and friendships and do you know how many channels are out there just waiting to hear something like this to pick it up as a story and what can I say to that you know I while I can understand where she's coming from I think she needs to understand that I can't possibly know every nuance of her reputation and her relationship her relationships with YouTube and other channels and what they might see as a thing when what I said was not incriminating in my opinion but the communication got messy that's it so at some point I talked to her about how her fans have been so hateful to me in comments and that that probably plays into a lot of this I I continue to go on and say you know it's not every Gabby fan but like you know the stands you know we know who I'm talking about I said they are the meanest nastiest commenters on YouTube I've seen and she stopped me and she said no no no we are not gonna talk about my fans that way those people are very important to me they are some of the best people I've ever met and they've gotten me through so much she's got very firm with me and then I took a step back and I realized even though I feel this way about about these fans I understood it I stopped or something yeah I get it these are your fans of course you're gonna want to protect them and and stand up for them so never mind that was one thing I I told her that I am NOT somebody who is hateful or mean or anything like that and said in fact I said I I so sympathize with what you're going through right now that when you were on your live stream I was recording a video about you that I have since decided I'm not going to post I don't know if she asked me what the video was about but I went ahead and told her and I was like it's about this this line that I hear you say so much in tweets in videos in song lyrics and in your fans and your fans comments and she asked what that line was and I said you know something along the lines with the the only reason people use your name is because makes their money or clicks views cloud etc and she stopped me and again no no no no no no that is not what I said and I said come on Gaby it's one of your song lyrics and she said that is not my song lyric I have never said that that's the only reason people use my name and I said okay okay um I understand that there's a distinction here for you between what I said and what your lyric is which is not only you know people only use it so I said I get that the wording that I'm using here is important to you and I respect that but I'm probably you know kind of mashing up what you've said with also what your comments what your fans have said in my comments a lot in fact I told her that I've heard it from other fandoms too that you're only using Trish's name for views you're only using and Geoffrey's name for views I'm sure I've heard that before and then she stopped me and she was like I thought you said that only my fans talked to you like that and I said not only I just overwhelmingly your fans talk to me like that when any other fandom really does not does not come close and she was like okay she got it um but but yeah we I said that I understood that this distinction in how I quoted this sentiment I said it's really the sentiment it wasn't about the verbatim verbage that I used which I can tell is very important to you and so and she said find where I said that and I said I'm not gonna do that Gaby because I believe you so I believe you fully so I'm not going to go look for quotes and dig through your Twitter to try to find receipts that I believe you are not there what's the point so that was on the list of things that she pointed out that things something she said to Irene which Irene seemed kind of flabbergasted over which in context I don't know if you're seeing this Irene but if you'd heard me say I'm not going to do that Gabi because I believe you and if I believe you it's not going to be there I think that a reasonable person would understand that there that was there was nothing wrong with me saying that that was actually pretty supportive of me and admitting that Gabi very well could be in the right there I think she's used to people being just sarcastic when they say that she could be right I don't know I tell people when I could be wrong so I honestly don't remember how this conversation started to go because it became a blur because we both started to get very heated a couple of things I do remember during that heated time was that she said it's kind of weird that you know my lyrics and I was just kind of like why is that weird like I told you I'm a fan I know some of your music but also clearly I don't know usually her ex because I just quoted I miss quoted them so I don't know what that was about it's fine I do think that it feeds into this notion that I'm like weird um obsessive and stuff like that so none of it really makes sense to me um the conversation got more and more heated so I don't remember specifically what she and I were saying back and forth at the same time I don't think that it matters because I think she's told you guys this it's a phone call we don't have it recorded so it's only like you know her word versus mine and very well um she may see this and say actually yeah she didn't correct some of the things she said yes Alicia did say these things I believe that some of the things I said she probably didn't hear um I did tell her that she talks so much so at length so quickly and so intimidatingly she's very she's very quick with the response it's almost like every single thing I say she's already had this fight before so she's ready with something right away so by the time I got a chance to speak I was dumbfounded I had nothing to say so I did point that out to her and at one point I raised my voice too much to the point where I think I yelled briefly and I stopped because I wanted to apologize to her this has happened to me a couple of times in my life where I've yelled at somebody and said oh no I don't do that I need to apologize which is funny because as she was finishing what she was saying I don't know what she was asking for an apology for but she said so don't you think you owe me an apology and I said well that's kind of funny because I was waiting for you to stop talking so that I could say hey I'm sorry for yelling at you just now and she thanked me for that I don't know if that was what she was asking for an apology for but she did thank me and and then at one point she called Peyton into the conversation and she was like hey babe babe babe babe come here you've been on speaker anyway and I said I said cabbie please are you really going to bring oh let me go back she did say while things were getting heated several times that I was being abusive manipulative gaslighting I have a list of all the words that she's used to describe me I don't have it on this phone but yeah abusive gaslighting manipulative victim playing narcissistic I'll maybe roll all the the names that she's called me here so then she calls Peyton and babe babe babe come here I said please don't bring somebody else into this and make this as a 2 versus one and she said no no Peyton's Peyton's good about this stuff he calls me on my [ __ ] I don't like fine that's whatever and she proceeded to tell him Peyton can you believe this she is accusing me of having a messy friendship with this person that we know with that friend that I just made not true and she said that I said the only way people make money is by using my name and when I asked her to show me proof she said no Gabby I'm not gonna do that and I'm like at this point I'm starting to get to the point of Tears because I am so frustrated and I was saying Gabby that's not Gabby stop that's not what I said please Gabby let me let me finish when I'm trying to say that's not what I said she would not let me finish she would not and of course what I was trying to get across to her was to remind her that I said I'm pointing right here cuz I remember where I was sitting when I said I'm not going to do that Gabby because I believe you so brought Payton into it I don't remember what Payton said to me she can tell you what Payton said to me all I remember is him using the words what you're trying to do and again at this point I'm already in tears and so I kept begging the both of them what am I trying to do Gabby what is it that you think I'm trying to do Payton what is it you think I'm trying to do like Gabby you think that that I am this like this conniving manipulative person and I've never been told this I don't think this way I don't even know what I'd be trying to manipulate you do I don't know what I'm trying I don't know what I'm trying to do please explain to me and I don't I don't know that they did explain to me what I was trying to do but it was getting late and she was like listen it's getting late you know we've already probably talked enough rent for now maybe we can hash the rest of this out later but it's getting late you need some rest I need to go you know I need to go also deal with my own stuff and it said some time with my man and jokingly as I was like wiping up my tears I don't know if this came directly before or after what I'm about to say but I said both it doesn't matter I said jokingly I was like that was so hard because I like Payton so I didn't want to hear him be mad at me and you know we both kind of laughed and that's because I liked Payton just like you watch a TV show and you like a character she's got two characters in her videos and I liked both of them so oh and she called Payton and and she said that they wanted to say something to me so what they expressed to me towards the end of this conversation when things were getting nicer was that they were probably coming from a place of PTSD that they have dealt with so many haters and so many people that were trying to manipulate situations they've had to defend themselves so much that it might very well be that that's what was coming off and I said I understand and along the similar vein I have dealt so much with a lot of your fans and my comments not being very nice so it could very well be that that's what a place I was coming from as well and before I ended the conversation in tears I said now that now that the conversation is just about over can you please just let me finish what I was trying to say earlier and she said sure and I made it clear again I said I didn't tell you I wasn't going to go find those receipts I didn't say Gabby I'm not going to do that to be mean or dismissive I said that because I believed you because I believed you I didn't think it was necessary to go look for something that wasn't I said show me where I said that and she was I'm not gonna go try and find it I said because I didn't say it and she said yes you absolutely did and I said no I absolutely did not and then she was like okay well then because you said you didn't I guess we're just gonna have to go ahead and believe you because you're always right or something along those lines and she let that be and ended the conversation by saying more or less look and if you ever want to talk you've got my phone number now feel free to text whether you want to talk about YouTube or just whatever and I said okay thank you and you know we hung up and I immediately got on the phone with one of my friends on FaceTime and she asked me how do you feel how do you feel that conversation went and I said well I'm not sure because it started out nice it ended nice and but I still feel really icky about it all and I don't know what to make of it and I don't know how what to do moving forward and so she was my friend was dumped she was like I don't know what to tell you and I said well she's texting me right now and she's being very nice so maybe I could give it a couple days like see how our interactions go maybe we'll finish like clearing the air between us and any confusion or anything like that and you know if we become friends or friendly that's great I've you know I've always liked her like I said like I don't like how she deals with drama but um I I like her personality so if we get along fine um but I but I'm not sure because it didn't this conversation something just didn't feel right off about it and I didn't feel heard frankly so as the next couple days are going by Gabby and I were texting each other here and there just friendly things um I think Oh at one point I did say I think it might've been that night maybe it's the next night I did I did talk again about Peyton and Irene I said sometimes I watch you and Peyton and I get so jealous because it just seems so easy between you guys and so natural and she totally got it she talked to Peyton up she talked about how wonderful he is and I don't know if it was in that same conversation but I did at some point say I'm jealous of you that you get to be friends with Irene and her response was Irene is perfect with the big teary eyes Irene is perfect and I was like I know I mean I can tell she seems wonderful and I think everybody thinks that so that was my weird jealousy and obsession about Irene and Peyton and I did tell her that they talked about something I was like yeah that's what I love about box of thoughts and she was confused she was like you watched the podcast Mellie yeah of course I do it's funny stuff she's a massive fan of me you Payton watches all the podcasts and she actually you know what she would just say the name like so that's weird to her for some reason it's weird to her at 6 million followers on her main channel and me saying I was a fan it's weird to her that I would listen to her podcast and no anything to do with her lyrics um that makes me deranged and or a massive fan or whatever she called me but anyway the conversations were pretty friendly then Wednesday oh and and keep in mind that as things are progressing between me and Gabi I'm still talking to our mutual friend Jim and I'm like hey by the way Gabi and I hashed this stuff out we're cool he's like that's great that's amazing I'm glad something positive came out of this and then as time progressed as you will hear the story I kept him in the loop about these things too so at one point I was on Twitter and somebody mentioned to me and said she's talking about you right now and at first I got defensive because I thought that that was some sort of joke about like me thinking that guy he's always talking about me and I said what does this mean exactly and she said hold up I'll find you a time stamp and I thought oh she's maybe Gabi actually is talking about me so I saw that she was live this woman sent me a time stamp I went to it and Gabi was talking about how this is what's happening she puts out a message she says something and then these channels they take it personally even though I didn't I don't mention anyone my name and then I'm getting all these messages about why are you talking about me why are you talking about me and and she says that when we do that we're outing ourselves that we're self incriminating because she didn't call anybody by name so if you come forward and say anything to hurt then clearly you're doing that thing she's accusing you of what's wrong with that logic is that if Gabby says something like about that posting hate videos and one of us reaches out and says hey why are you talking about us close to hate videos it doesn't mean yes we're posting hate videos it means yes we know we qualify as whatever you've described as this thing that should be clarified to um so I said to this person I was like well Gabby and I already squashed um we squash what we were talking about yesterday so I think she's probably talking about somebody else and this person was like oh I'm sorry I didn't mean to like rile anyone if I was like no it's fine she and I'm fine but then somebody brought to my attention that she really was talking about me later in that stream so I watched that clip and in that clip she said something like um I've been talking to this person and and then she started to talk about what happened she was like but but just by the way like things are fine we're cool I'm cool with this person but it started out she said something on Twitter that I was tagged in she said something hateful and then I responded to her and when I got on the phone with her and saw and saw that she was very upset I asked her what she was very upset about and she was upset because she didn't think I would see it and then behind camera you hear Payton say yep just like they all like to do they all want to run their mouths and think that you're not gonna say anything and that at that point I feel like Payton and Gabby were doing this whole like yup they don't think that I can step up and pop a bite and respond and again that is not why said that I'm not afraid of a response from Gabby Hanna I've already dealt with her fans all sicked on me and now here I am standing calm collected but at first I didn't think much of that I was just like it's not too bad I was like kind of kind of sucks that Peyton said what he did and also sucks it she still seems to not understand what I meant by being upset and what I meant by her responding to my tweet but then I gave her the benefit of the doubt I said you know when we not to her but I was thinking when we hash this out it was a very emotional phone call so maybe she didn't understand where I was coming from so I texted her it was a long text and I but to hit on the main points I just said hey this is not a huge deal but I did see where he spoke about me in your livestream and I have to be honest it stung a little to hear Peyton and talk about people running their mouths thinking you're not going to respond and me being the example or maybe you know like the launching point for why you would say that and I am I am so confused as to why Peyton keeps getting dragged into her arguments with me I don't know if other people have experienced this that I've never seen him involved in all this and but I also went to explain what I would I meant by I didn't think you would respond right I didn't think you would see I said it really has more to do with the magnitude of your platform and who you are and I said kind of like as an example if I went on Twitter and said I'm the kind of person that Brad Pitt finds hateful I wouldn't expect Brad Pitt to like see that Kerr retaliate etc like you know you're just throwing comments out in the void so it was really that I still don't think she sees the distinction and that's fine but I kind of read it again like also like again I'm sure it's no big deal I just wanted to clarify that since you know a very emotional conversation now before prior to this she had been responding to all of my texts right away which is fine that's how I text um but she didn't respond right away and I thought you know it was a long text that I sent she's got a lot of other things that are far more important than this going on I recognize that and so give it some time let her wait let's wait until she's in a place where she can respond or at the very least acknowledge this and say I will respond to this later and by the way if she doesn't respond at all that's fine but I reserve the right to not want to be her friend so but I gave it time and a few hours later she still hadn't responded and I honestly there was a little part of me that I don't want to say worried but wondered if perhaps somebody finally pulled her away from the internet for a little while like let's go on a hike leave your phone at home type of deal or perhaps she went somewhere to get help I don't know because she had been in a very bad place that she expressed to us and so there was part of me that wondered about that I later checked Twitter again and saw that she was actively tweeting again and she still hadn't responded to my text but again I didn't feel important enough for her to quickly respond to me so I said I'm gonna give it a day I think that's fair give it a good like 24 hours ish and over the course of these 24 hours that those things that bothered me about that live stream not only started to bother me more and more because I just don't think that that is how you speak to and of people that you are now friendly with I don't think they get that I don't think sHIIP Aton get that and that and that even if you don't name my name doesn't mean I'm not going to get hurt like that's important to that you still could be kind of talking trash about me like but yeah it just doesn't feel good and on top of that and I was seeing how she was continually bickering with people on Twitter I posted support for her I said something like I don't f with people in their mental health when something like that is going on like I don't like a mockery of it I don't support this and I was getting a lot of backlash from people saying yeah but mental health is shouldn't be an excuse for mistreating people and a lot of I was getting a lot of messages at going that sentiment and what didn't sit well with me is that I have said that several times on my channel I am somebody who struggles with mental illness I speak a good bit about mental health on my channel but I've always said that mental health is not an excuse for bad behavior so I understood where those comments are coming from I continued to see Gabi be mean to other people online and what really I think put the nail in the coffin for me was seeing how her fans were speaking to people particularly Dustin daily now I understand she and Dustin go back and forth and they're mean to each other but these things that Dustin showed us that are the way her fans talk to him are so vile so vile I have never seen anybody else's fandom talk like that again so and and no you're not entirely responsible for how your fans behaved but speak up and this is what I started to think this is so I also should mention where this is personal for me my brother died a little less than four years ago when I read this like flippant comment about your dead sister that you'd guilt trip guilt trip people with that struck a chord in me because if so if somebody said that about my brother here three and a half four years later I would take serious serious issue with that person and then the second thing that he showed was just so much more disgusting and vile and so the fact that she does not speak up very clearly maybe she says things on patreon she says so she says but how do we know those of us who see that and get offended by it how do we know that you are denouncing this behavior in your fans so this just really all started to not sit well with me over the course of the day Wednesday and so by the time Thursday came around um Thursday afternoon ish I thought okay you know it's been it's been about 24 hours and frankly my life these past few days has been nothing but Gabby Hannah and I'm done like I don't want to be talking and thinking about Gabby Hannah constantly anymore so asking if I should like respond because she started threatening me this morning I reached out to her and I posted these texts and you guys can see them but the gist of my message was hey I still don't feel great about these things that you didn't respond to and as well as things that have been going on on Twitter I I do feel that I need to explain to my subscribers what's been going on because I have seemed confused and erratic in the way that I have supported you and not supported you et cetera um but um however I want to step away from this line of communication and as much as you know a lot of us want to like in that moment we're nervous like maybe I should just block her eyes I've already said on my channel the right thing to do before you block somebody is to tell them what you're gonna do and give them a chance to speak so I said I would like to end this line of communication unless you have something important to say then she responds right away so that's why I'm sorry like whatever reason Gabby that you gave me for not responding for 24 hours to me saying it's that they heard I I don't buy because you could have acknowledged it or was it just magic that you happen to return to your phone and have the capacity to respond when you saw what I said then when potentially it hurt you doesn't matter what it hurt when it hurts me but when it hurts you even though I was very tactful about it and I didn't need to tell Gabi Hannah that I was going to speak to my subscribers publicly about what happened but I felt that that was the right thing to do was to give her a heads up and that's what she used against me so again you guys see the text she went off she sent me a couple of about one minute each voice messages where she's going off and in which one of them she got again goes Payton hey babe come here can you believe it she's saying that and I'm like again again bringing Payton into this why what is this I don't get this why because at the beginning of this I said no I liked him like I don't get it um but she's just like going up and like okay if this is the kind of person you are then this is what we'll do and I sent to voice messages back to her there were each about a minute and in one of them I tried again to explain myself in these misconceptions about what I meant about this and what I meant about that that was the first one and in the second one I said I still this is not verbatim but nobody knows at this point because it's a phone conversation these audio messages are gone and so take my order don't but the second message was me saying something like but do know that I continue to stand by you when it comes to any injustice 'as against you whether that be you know because of YouTube having a glitch or something happening over there anything that is just not right I support you in that and I also support you still against people who are making a mockery of your mental health because that's not okay and she was as I was leaving those she was like I'm not gonna loser that I'm training right now I told you I'm still not gonna listen to those voice messages sure she's at the gym I'm it's great that she could leave me voice messages but couldn't listen to mine it wasn't I'm gonna have to listen to this later it wasn't let me step outside or it wasn't even I know it's unfair that I send them to you for you to listen to but I won't listen to yours back it's fine fine um but as you guys saw the converse fizzled out with her gearing up to fight she was ready to fight according to her she's not gonna stop fighting for herself Peyton's not gonna stop fighting for her that she was gonna tell her side whatever um and I blocked her I told I think I believe I told her as well before that happened I did I did ask her again you guys can see all this pause and if you want to read them I did say something to the effect of you know I don't have these kinds of conversations with people in my life I don't have these kinds of fights and I think I asked her do you have these kinds of fights a lot it seems like you do and she said only with monsters on the Internet to which I got offended and from what I understand from the live stream she wasn't talking about she wasn't calling me a monster again this is something I'm taking personally however I said the way you talked do you talk to people like this the way you're speaking to me and if what you say that the way you're speaking to me is reserved for monsters on the internet then that's not even transitive property that equals I am a monster so I said monster cool let me go be really nice to you on the internet and then she said you called me a monster and it got confusing I've never called her a monster I've also never called her a narcissist this person feels so entitled to my life and wants to call me a narcissist blocked her ended that conversation thought everything was gonna be fine I'll explain this to my subscribers and and I'll probably make a video um that I'm where I try to be as fair as possible and we'll go on and continue to make the content that I like and just not have to worry about any personal lines of communication between me and Gabby like it's gonna be over however shortly thereafter I got a ton of message well and I started to get a ton of comments on Twitter so I had a feeling something was up and some people alerted me to the fact that Gabby was not only on livestream but she was targeting in her livestream to talk about our conversations I need to back up a little we were in deep I blocked her sorry I blocked her on my phone and then went to Twitter and saw that she was DMing me and during these Danns is where she called me a narcissist again um where she called me two-faced because I changed my mind about her and then she said something like don't think you don't think I don't know that you told Jim that I convinced you to do something or you commit it's like one of us convinced the other to do something and told somebody I did not know what she was talking about and I said please explain I am so confused and she said Jim showed me your conversations so I thought I didn't say anything in those conversations that I can't stand behind but Wow Wow when somebody shares your personal conversations with somebody else and I did say um okay well I wonder oh I don't know if I told you guys this much I told I told you that it kind of kept this Jim in the loop about everything that had been going on and he always sided with Gaby that he supported her like okay we'll try to be nice to her she's going through a lot she's going to a lot she's going through a lot when I finally told him about this phone conversation and why I was having mixed feelings about whether or not to go on supporting her I don't know if I said earlier I'm sorry I over the course of these those two days where Gaby and I were talking um I wanted to go to bat for her because of the way some people were treating her mental health through all this and I but I needed to find a way I felt to bring it up to my subscribers that I was supporting her through this without sounding like I'm oddly like changing my tune about her but she asked me during that phone conversation not to tell anybody that we spoke because then people would say that Gaby Hannah spoke to hello leash just like she always does to you laid her in to being on her side and I was like okay I don't usually I don't keep secrets or like lie but I'll do my best not to tell them that we had this conversation yet but I wanted to think of a way that I could support her and so over the course of a couple of days I had an idea and I was like look I don't agree with how people are treating you your mental health some of these videos so I want to make a video since I do commentary anyway speaking out against treating people like this and then from there I can throw out the idea that I've asked you which I have I've asked you if you'd like to address some of the criticisms I've given you and her response to that was that sounds lovely and so in these conversations with Jim where you see me say she convinced me to make a video in her favor but now I'm just not sure um I believe that Gabby and a good bit of her fans took that to mean that she pressured me into making a video she didn't she definitely like really went to bat for herself and I do think tried her best to get me on her side but I'm an adult and I decide which side to take and it was my idea to make a video like that which I'm not gonna do I've spoken out against that enough I don't agree with people making a mockery of her mental health I'm not gonna make a video of that it though at this point but that was my decision when I said she convinced me to it was more just like with our conversations with her personality with the stories she told me I'm convinced I was convinced to make a video but now I'm not sure and he asked me about how that conversation the phone conversation went he said what was the tone of the conversation and I told him what I told you guys step-by-step this is how it went and these are some things that were said and his response was it sounds to me I'll show you guys it sounds to me like you were bullied and I have a hard time believing Gabby Hanna would do that to you you're the kindest most soft-spoken person on YouTube so suffice it to say Jim and I have not spoken a whole lot since then honestly I think probably because he was embarrassed that I found out that he shared our conversations he did tell me I said you know this is getting me into some sort of drama that I don't want and he said yeah me neither and just for the record I'm not going to say anything about Gaby Hanna moving forward unless it's positive and I told him this is a problem I don't know how to tell this part of my story while protecting you bearing in mind that I am trying to figure out how to protect somebody who outed me to somebody who has it in her to send thousands of people to attack me bear that in mind I'm trying to protect this guy and then I thought you know what I can't like just like I was trying to protect him before I'm not I'm not gonna do that and so that's where I said I told Gaby like I don't know if he told you that he thought you were bullying me and then I shared that with with you guys on Twitter so I know I might have kind of been like all over the map with this day and trust me it felt it felt that way but this was around the time that Gaby the top Don lied and I was getting all kinds of comments from people I didn't really look at most of them I've really I've changed my settings and all that so I only get certain kinds of notifications and even then I don't acknowledge most of them for my own sanity right now but you can't I can't escape all of the questions and all people asking if I'm okay and thankfully I have some really really amazing wonderful people in my camp that were there for me all day yesterday I'm not gonna act like it didn't hurt I'm not gonna act like I wasn't affected I was really affected the thing is with me is that I kept that meltdown that I was having over being sick Don I kept that private with the people that I trust and I let them talk me through it and weighed it and decided early on that I'm not gonna speak on this until I'm calm again and here we are despite hearing all of these lies and and just twisted stories and name-calling all of that that I was hearing about I just I I decided to give it some time so and as far as I know that's where we are I've blocked Gabby on Twitter um so if she is tweeting anything about me I don't know about it I'm not looking for it some people think that my patrons Twitter handle is me in disguise like go on thinking that I guess if you want but I'm the kind of person that if I want to engage I will engage I will engage as me but I just want to go run through these points again just to make sure that I covered them you um so I do want to make it clear it was during that live that she gave her fans permission to defend her however they see fit and so here's an issue that I take with that I want to make this very clear I said in a video in that my last video about Gabby and you know her addressing her drama with people I said that it seemed to me that when people walk Gabby Gabby takes that as an attack she's not the only person that I've known who feels that way she takes that as an attack in my opinion people need to use the block feature responsibly but they should use it more because it is a means of protection it is a boundary in a wall that a person can put up to protect themselves and Gabby sees that as an attack so that's problem one problem two is that she can send fleets of thousands of angry young fans who will just tear into a person and the nastiest most vile ways and to hurt that's defense that's defending herself that's not defense Gabby that's offense and according to you what you called war it was an attack so to go through these quick points well go through these points quickly um why does Gabby insist I hate her never did I never did I never thought she was speaking to me specifically so therefore also the point about she's taking this so personally no I didn't even though somebody said to her on the livestream earlier like Gabby this isn't personal and she got so up in arms with them and said not personal this is not personal this is personal and I'll tell you how so I guess you know according to Gabby you get to decide when something is personal that aside I didn't take it that personally I just felt that I was spoken to in a very broad sense the her saying that I'm only angry about a messy situation with a mutual friend no I said that that with these tweets going on I that there was a confusion because the city because the communication with this mutual friend was messy if I can find the direct quote I will but I said that things got messy with us talking to this mutual friend that's all he said we weren't having any messy situations me and him nor do I think he and she were she said that that I felt lied to that her friend was lying nobody's talking about her when in fact like I said he came to me he approached me he approached me and he said that he came across my video that he didn't look for it that it was served to him or something like that then he tells Gabby that YouTube was serving him nothing but hate videos so when you say only hate videos only hate videos and my video is included in those only hate videos and then you're saying it's not about me for one that doesn't add up for two I thought he said that once he went and searched Gabby's name all that came up were hate videos so that was something she and I talked about and she corrected me about two things she said no this was on the phone she said no he said when he opened his YouTube up again that it was only hate videos about me and then I said okay but oh oh the other thing was - I said but you also told us that he said he didn't watch them and she said Noah no I didn't say that I said he didn't want to watch them he said he didn't want to watch them so I went back and I'll tell you where I was wrong and where I was right she was right and that she did say when he opened his YouTube again that's what he was served so I was wrong he didn't go searching and so he really did probably stumble upon my video however he did watch my video so do I feel lied to a little bit like it's not a huge one but yeah somebody's lying or maybe Gabi was the one who was lied to who knows somebody lied somewhere oh yeah I said that Gabi thinks I said she crossed a line and when really I meant I said lines were crossed meaning like telephone lines were crossed meaning confusion miscommunication the content claim I think I explained all of that to you guys she was correct I did angry tweet at her she did fix it right away I didn't take down the tweet I continued to say nice things about her I didn't think to delete between I'm sorry that I didn't delete the tweet I it's a it's legitimately not something I thought about she also said you think I'm talking about you all the time I literally do not do I think you were talking about me mate maybe too much or concerned with about me way too much yesterday yeah again 27k six million and you went in front of all of them to talk about me I don't think Gabi Ana understands not only the magnitude of her platform but the kind of power that comes along with that and so I'm not gonna say much more about that I'm a small Channel she's a big channel but I don't think she understands the dynamics and the optics it's one thing for me at 27k who had an experience with somebody at 6 million to put up a video about it that makes more sense than a creator with 6 million to go on to to go on for an hour and a half very emotionally about a creator with 27k and sick her fans on them and to do so so emotionally so erratically and with so many lies and yet here me the little creator I took time I took my time and waited till I was calm to put together a fair video so I want everybody to take note of that I especially I don't think Gabi will take note of that I hope with the people around her understand that that's what's happening here I don't have an army of 6 million or at least thousands of people who are gonna go attack and attack an attack to defend me but furthermore my fans are not the type of people who do that and you can say that you've told your fans this but I have made it very clear that I do not want any of my viewers to go and act nasty with anybody else and be on behalf of me because I'm not gonna let them misrepresent me so the power imbalance here is so off the charts and so unfair and so and such disgusting behavior from Gabby Anna that I still don't know I can wrap my head around the situation and yet I'm still more composed about this than she is and I'm still willing to share facts and tell you guys where I was wrong or where I could have been better moving along I was crying because her fans were responding to me know we've already talked about that I was upset because I was overwhelmed by this rapid-fire Twitter conversation and the fact that I was getting now involved and you were very very highly anxious and distraught situation the fact that she thinks she's on my mind for me to be called a narcissist by this person which will get there called her a narcissist again where Daddy I've told my viewers my patrons never to call you that we don't call you that I'm not I can't lie and say that I've never liked a comment that might have mentioned you calling you that because early on I used to heart every comment and then I would heart every comment that just said anything nice to me but I have been very careful here lately the more I've grown and the more criticism I get to make sure that I am Harding the right kinds of comments and in fact Gabby there have been a couple of people who left really nasty comments on my videos about you that I do think are below the belt and they involve that word and I delete those comments so no I don't call you that I'm not not only am I not I say hi a psychiatrist a psychologist a therapist anybody who can diagnose you not only is that the case but also if I were those things I'm not your psychiatrist so it would be unethical of me to call you a narcissist and so by that logic by the way you don't reserve the right to call me a narcissist you don't get to decide my diagnosis and the thing where she said I thought the lyric was about her it's like there's that's just that would be probably the most insane insane part of all of this all of your fans keep saying it's kind of funny because her name brings you lots of money and you said that in your song about me and I was like whoa you don't actually really think and I said this on the phone papers right there my witness you don't think I wrote a lyric about you Oh like you're gonna grow your channel you're gonna get clicks you're gonna get views and a couple things I know if she's not speaking to me of course first and foremost she's probably talking about people like Jessie smiles Alex James and jela Cole's I can imagine her thinking I called her a narcissist just because so many people have and all the words that she called me abusive manipulative toxic gaslighting victim playing all that stuff she's she's heard those words so many times thrown at her it is the new your mama like people don't throw around the same insults they did before they throw around these psychology terms and I did not use them on her um but the song weird thing that was just that was bananas am I just like no I did not I never ever said that that was about me I didn't even know the lyric clearly I said that that sentiment could apply to me that your fans have applied that sentiment to me so get that right and so again threatened to expose Gabi told her what happen in this situation I don't think I told you guys anything that wasn't relevant to this situation so no I didn't expose Gaby do I know more yes am I gonna say it no sono Gaby I'm not gonna expose you but once I make a video the narrative is going to be the Gaby Hannah manipulated small channels to get them to make positive it nope told you guys that I made that decision on my own that she was nice to me that I started to like her that I fell for her and that I made the decision that I wanted to make that video I'm 34 years old and I have my head on straight so no I'm not gonna act like I'm such a victim that you manipulated it no not spending that narrative either do I think you lied yeah do I think that you believe your lies a good bit yeah do I think you stepped out of line oh hell yeah do I think that you did wrong by sending your fans to attack me yes that is one of the worst things that that a content creator can do in terms of how they manage their relationships with other content creators and their fans that's what you've done but I am oddly into Payton and jealous Irene and talked to you guys about that and then just the funny part about how how either she's spinning this narrative or people her fans are taking it this way but that I'm this massive fan that I got my feelings hurt because she goes to me and like didn't respond to me in such a timely fashion or whatever no I felt that somebody was talking to me stopped responding to me the moment I said I was hurt and if I were so obsessed with Gabby and needing her attention why is it that I'm the one who had to ask to please walk away from this line of communication why is it that I'm the one who had to block her why is it that she came to me in d-ends and then I had to block her Indy answer I'd to block her on Twitter and then on top of that then Gabby goes to her live stream so really at least in the scope of the past couple of days like I'm sorry but who's obsessed with whom I part of the big reason I asked to step away from that is I am done with be involved in Gabi Hanna drama am I going to go back to make my usual content where if she does something and III want to talk about it I'm going to talk about it but in terms of being personally involved with her no I gave that a go um you know I wondered how that might go I wondered if it might be like how everybody describes and I gave I gave it the benefit of the doubt I didn't have a good time so that said that's what happened from my perspective 100% truth I don't know that I'm gonna see your comments but if there's anything that I should clarify feel free to try to ask me if you're just genuinely asking out of respect try to find a way to ask me I will clarify whatever um but as it stands I think that Gabby Hanna is in dire need of some more guidance I do think that I'm not going to play any sort of mental health professional here just as somebody who was a friend for two days or so I think that if I were close to you I would do more to ask you to step away and to get whatever you need to feel better because people have said this and I I hold I hold true to this is that what you're going through is very difficult to watch like you or not it's difficult to watch I don't want to see you in pain Gabby I don't know how much of this is true about this conspiracy about YouTube you know trying to sabotage your career I don't know how much of that is true but I have supported you every step of the way and saying that there's evidence that it's true and so I said I told you that I hope I'm so happy for you when you said you found some evidence and I said this makes me happy and that I hope that this comes with a side of karmic retribution never you never shone the light on that but I said that publicly and tagged you but I hold true to that I do hope that if this is going on then it is rectified and you get what you deserve in in the good way in the best way I'm not saying that as a mean person I hope you get what you deserve if you deserve better and the other part too is that I maintain that I disagree with anybody who is making a mockery of your mental health right now and anybody who is reveling in your pain right now because as as angry as I am with you I don't revel in your pain I don't take joy in thinking that this might that this video might hurt you but I also cannot go on to enable you by allowing you to silence me I have to speak this side of the truth because I am NOT going to lie on the tracks next to somebody who is gonna throw I'm mixing metaphors but who's gonna throw the rug out from underneath me so not trying to worsen your situation I do hope that things start to look up very soon I really hope that people treat you fairly and all I can say is that I did my best to do that here to everybody who heard me out I know this is probably the longest video I've ever made but I know that it was important to a lot of people to hear my side of this so thank you to those of you who genuinely heard me out to decide whatever is there and at this point that's up to you thank you

Channel: helloleesh

Views: 261,758

Rating: 4.4347038 out of 5

Keywords: gabbie hanna, alicia, leesh, helloleesh, drama, trisha paytas, shane dawson, jeffree star

Id: F2yzsBL6-ck

Length: 96min 21sec (5781 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 20 2020